This Whole Thing Is A Bad Idea! (Your Son Is A Parasite!) 

Her silence every time they said something negative about her son shows that he’s been coddled his entire life and that’s why he’s in the same place he was 16 yrs ago.

The son had three children in a one bedroom apartment BEFORE the parents bought the house for them. That was already a sign the son was not going to get his financial act together.

Her son will probably sell the house, buy a bigger one, and end up in foreclosure anyway. What a loser.

As soon as she said he’s our “only child” nothing else surprised me about this call.

"An eagle that doesn't leave the nest is eventually known as a turkey".🤣🤣

Love Dave's line "a safety net is fine -- a safety hammock is not"

Did anyone else notice that the woman was completely silent when Dave said the son was a parasite and a mess? She couldn't bring herself to admit it out loud.

This is my parents. Am one of 5 children. My parents are blindly enabling my sister for not only her rent, but a new car, private school tuition all while the both she & husband refuses to get a job, not give up smoking and weekly friday nights at the pub getting so drunk, he doesnt come home. My sister just had baby no.4 when they couldnt even afford 3. I cut my parents off when they said i was the problem.

Best thing my parents ever did was to let my wife and I struggle through $100k of debt. It nearly broke us, but we had to learn to stand on our own so we'd never make the same mistakes. Now we're debt free besides the house and so much better for it

Who else is binge watching this channel right now?

It makes me sick to my stomach just to hear a mom talking like this, thinking she is helping her son and she is just helping him to be a parasite.

She created this mess. This is the result of giving your children everything in life with them having no skin in the game. You are not helping your kids when you hand then everything. You create an entitled worthless adult.

I totally agree. My grandparents were enablers for a long time and I was never good with money until they cut me off. After they did I ended up falling on my face and learning my way. I own my house and I have a large 401K retirement on my own.

This asset should have been settled during the divorce.

your son deserves a mess because he is a mess. Dave cut her off before she got a chance to say that her son is worried his dad is going into a nursing home and the house will go to pay the nursing home, the son called Mommy to fix it just like she has fixed every other problem in his life.

This is exactly why when my kids throw a fit over “being accountable for their chores” I smile-I’m not going to let my children think they will not be held accountable in life.

Her 'only son' was trained and raised by his mom to be her dependent pet. Keeping him close by raising him to be helpless and needing her rescuing through life has kept him tied to her like in chains. She crippled his spirit to be inadequate and needing mom to helicopter in for a quick rescue again and again. All rescuers need a victim to save, all victims need a rescuer to save them. A sick relationship mom created but she did it well.

Hardest thing I did as a parent was watch my children fall flat on their face. They are both grown, independent, and good parents now. I saw so many spoiled rotten mean girls growing up in SoCal. I would never do that to my own kids.

I'd give him the house i.e. 30K but I would remove him from my will and he would inherit nothing because of his mismanagement. He will literally waste all money left to him and still end up bankrupt. Someone in this family should have manned up a long time ago.

My BIL lived like this with his Mother up until 50 years old. Didn't pay any rent, hardly did any of the so called caregiving he was supposed to. For years we tried to persuade his Mother to throw him out. He drank himself to death last year! What a freaking waste! Whats more she was going to leave him her entire estate because he was "special!"

My parents told me their responsibility was to raise me to be an independent, self supporting adult,and that’s exactly what I am. I’ve seen too many people who don’t want their kinds to be independent.

This woman is worth several million yet doesn't have professional legal counsel to walk her through this? Something doesn't add up.

If the son has kids the inheritance should bypass the son and be invested until those children come to 21 years old.

Best advice my dad ever gave me was "Nobody owes you anything. You got nothing coming!" This simple advice gave me a super hardworking mindset that set me apart and served me very well over the years.

Why do people keep popping out kids they can't afford? 😳😳😳 👏👏👏STOP.

Never do for someone else what they could do for themselves. 💯

I wish I had parents that bought me a house... Some people are very lucky.

Sell the house and tell them surprise!! Reality check!! Use the money in your retirement. And this is coming from a 20 something that barley has life together haha. I would never do this to my parent, they shouldn’t either.

Dave is 100% right here and it amazes me how quick he picked up on the situation. Mommy takes a guess the home is around $100k. Junior's been paying on this "100k" for 16 years. 100k divided by 16yrs is 6250/yr and 520.83/mo. HOW IS THIS THING NOT PAID OFF?!! Kudos to Dave for realizing this and creating a longer video on this "taboo" subject. Definitely, a topic that needs to be discussed more often!

I needed to watch this. I've been giving a drunk a drink the past 2yrs. Actually 32. Now I have to spend money and time to take this person to court, to get them out of my house. It's a nightmare. I've not done more for anyone else in my family as much as i have for her, and this is what I get. The one thing she's accomplished is I'll never be this helpful, or enabling, to anyone in my family again. And it's really sad bc I just wanted to help her.

Sounds like Your son needs to go homeless to get his act together. Often times, people don’t wake up until they have no option.

She's going to end up paying even more to keep him from losing the house when he doesn't pay the property taxes.

I disagree all enablers are always kind, sweet people. They may seem that way. But alot of them are mentally sick and codependent.

This is a parent who did THE WRONG THING by her child. The proof is in the pudding. She treated the son like a baby and did the hard work for him. SURPRISE! Sixteen years later the son is no better off and the situation is way more complicated. SMDH. 🙄

Very grateful to have found this channel and the principles in my 20s. Some people in very sad situations later in life due to financial mismanagement.

So many young 20 somethings now feel entitled. They expect you to drop everything and give them what they want!

Wow. I wish my parents would have been that generous

I'm seeing more and young couples moving into parents' homes and THEN having babies while there. All so hubby can coast on a minimum wage job and wifey doesn't have to work at all. It's one thing to move in and hustle for a couple of years and then get out. It's completely another to move in and become squatters.

She's the literal definition of an enabler. Wooooow. Her kids are gross, but they raised them entitled and with no responsibility....sooo

Sign the house over without giving the 30K and let the chips fall where they may.

The mother actually said “she was doing right by him” Meaning her son. She actually ruined him by handing him a house he had no idea how to afford or manage and which he could not get on his own. What’s gonna happen when both of these Parents have passed? Will they leave their son who has no idea how to manage money, all the money they have left? In this situation where the adult child has no idea how to manage money I would put everything in a trust for my grand children’s education. I would give everything else to good charities. I can almost guarantee you that the Adult son is not worried about anything because he’s counting on his inheritance. I’ve worked for estate lawyers for a long time and I’ve seen a lot of the worst of people that money brings out, and how entitled adult children are.

The son is never going to change and there is no way I would pay the house off and give it to him. I grew up poor and my parents didn't help me at all once I left home at 18 to go to college. I'm glad that they didn't because I learned how to make it on my own and do what it took to better my life. I have never asked my mom or any other family member for anything and I never will.

She needs to sell out her interest in the house and let the kid figure it out.

Nothing wrong with living with your parents as long as you're maturing and working towards your future. There are many benefits to having shared expenses and close family.

Love that comment on the end. Soooo true. We aren't raising kids! We are raising adults who are going through childhood.

Sell the son

A safety net is fine, a safety hammock is not. I love that. I also laughed out loud when he said I love you so much I'm going to help you move the couch And when he said that you're going to know what a callus is except for on your thumbs Ramsey was on fire with really funny statements in this call

Every time this woman said "um", an angel got its wings.

In my opinion they are feeling guilty for failing their son early on in life and he is milking their guilt.

Give you grown child notice and sell the house. As bad as he has done he will not keep up the house. 10+/- years they will be evicted from the house for not paying taxes.

"You entertain a clow you join the circus" love it! Clean and neat with a bow on it, very well said.

This is fabulous. Tell-it-like-it-is Dave Ramsay is handing out tough love in the best way! I need a good dose of that! Thanks Dave & team.

I don't think the dad is going to give up his half. He's been paying for a deadbeat son for 16 years and doesn't have the cushion the mom has from what she said. If he has health problems I could see him refinancing his half..

This is great advice to parents and many parents need to hear it. Thank you for the honesty! Being a parent is the hardest job and sometimes people don't realize what they're doing until someone points it out. God bless.

Sell the house so the ex has money. He's older and has probably worked his whole life, has health issues and doesn't have a good money situation. The kid is young and needs to bust his *** for a change. Quit having kids.

One of the biggest misconceptions of my youth was that all wealthy people were more intelligent than me.

I am 32 and live at home. I make 75k a year, and pay my family rent monthly. I am building wealth. I do not understand the shaming of living with family as long as both parties are mutually benefitting.

Uncle Dave is so real. 🔥

My sweet, financially savvy mom did quite a bit to help out my siblings and me in our young adult years. I would not advocate for every mom to help every young-adult child financially, but boy am I grateful.

"Your son deserves a mess...because he is a mess."

If I were in the caller’s situation, I would pay off the house & set up something like a trust fund for the four grandchildren & have the house part of that trust. Their son & wife are obviously incompetent financially so any money going their way would just be wasted. At least there’s still hope for the grandkids.

16 years and they don’t have enough credit to finance $30K?????? That’s less than most new cars these days!!!!!!!1

My dad always told me and my brother and sister growing up that you can only help someone that is willing to help themselves or his other saying was help is a hand up not a handout he was always willing to help us as long as we held up our end of the agreement there was always conditions on getting his help on something

Finally a co-host contributed to the conversation other than disrupt it. And he is nice add-on. Keep it up!

God Bless you Dave Ramsey for dealing with such irresponsible people. Love how honest you are 🙌🏻

I’ll be her son. I promise to be responsible.

I’m a closing agent in Chicago and they could remove either the mom or dad & add the son & DIL onto the deed w/o a credit check & put that house in a living trust with the DIL &Son as beneficiaries so whenever the parent who’s still on the deed passes the son & DIL can keep it. PROBLEM SOLVED

After the house is gifted to the loser son, he's going out and getting a heloc and buying a new truck.

Good parents want to see their kids suffer a bit because they appreciate the character it builds.

When I bought a house for my daughter there was 1 condition she paid all lawyers fee and mortgage .could not miss more then 2 payment . When she missed the 2 payment I sold the the house and she had to move to a apartment

The 3:02 son has been making all the house payments, it's just not in his name. So he's not a loser, he just doesn't have his crap together

Wouldn't it just be simpler if she just bought out her ex? Then she can just rent to her son for the time being. All the while develop a strategy to sell it or gift it to the son.

Raising children is hard work..... unless you take the easy road and spoil them.

In the first two minutes i heard two issues one they had SIXTEEN YEARS to fix their credit. Two it’s in Daddys name and he is dying but they seem more worried about them losing their house than their dad dying even when dad bought them a house. What a piece of work couple.

I like the way she casually said “a couple million” when Dave asked her what her net worth is. She is my hero (minus the parasite son) 😛

Oh my goodness. It is crystal clear how her son ended up as helpless and unaccountable as he did. They raised him to end up this way. At this point Lady - just pay the house off for him and out it in his name. He can’t do anything himself. You and his father have failed him and he doesn’t have it in himself to grow up.

Her silence after, "I wouldn't deed it and neither should your ex." This woman has no idea that she and her ex are the problem and she is clearly going to keep enabling him.

Helping someone in a tough spot is good, but in general, people don’t value what they don’t work for; so it’s not surprising that he doesn’t appreciate what his parents had to do to give him that house.

Don't participate in someone else's crazy! Amen!

Before the ink dries, the son will take out home equity leans and live the good life. Eventually, they will sell the home or it will go in default.

Thank you for leaving this entitled man- child for society to deal with now.

I used to tell my teenagers, "I love your affection and approval. But I won't risk your future to get WHAT I NEED/WANT right now,

A tree in a windy location grows stronger than a tree in a sheltered location. I was spoilt a lot as a child but I quickly realised that the only way I was gonna be able to become a strong adult was by breaking away from my parents generosity.

investing requires good experience and knowledge to carry out a good and successful trade, I have lost a lot trying to trade all by myself May I ask which investments are good?......

Even if this all works out "well" and the son gets the house free and clear, it sounds like he's going to lose it in the next 10 years defaulting on a HELOC. If she feels sorry for him, pay it off and put it in a trust to protect him from his own stupidity.

What I got from my physically and mentally abusive dad was I was welcome to stay at home for as long as necessary, but once I left, I was not to come home for anything longer than a meal. I left at 18 (1968) and came home for Christmas and Thanksgiving until my mother died (1972), then there was no reason to go home. I didn't see my father for many years, I did run into him at a funeral once, and when he died in a roll-over accident I went to his funeral; my duty as a daughter was done.

Find these videos very enlightening! Thank you!

She has created a looser!

If I were this lady, I would disinherit the son and his wife. The house would be all they’d get. The inheritance would go to the grandchildren but there be something in the will where her son and wife wouldn’t be able to touch that.

Gotta love when irresponsible people have children and then get to use them for emotional extortion.

Thanks for your important financial insights. God bless.

I've had to learn many hard lessons from debt to finding my true love. My life was never easy because first, I have a learning disability, but I've learned to work hard and power through. 2nd, I got myself into debt, but I'm almost out. So I always say to myself and others, "Keep Moving Forward."

I can tell a memorable story: When mom was doing 50-60 hours of work-weeks, her little daughter was often in grandma's care, had her own bed, all necessary things and a corner for her own play-things. A little girl, a BFF, came to visit and marvelled at so very few toys. - Don't you have more? the visiting girl asked tring to shame the grandkid a little. - Not here, I have more toys at Mom's, but my Nanny loves me so much, that I only have these favourites here, because that is best for me. This was surely precocious and echoed Grandma's own words, but the thing is the relationship and the days at Grandma's were totally harmonious. Grandma was absolutely kind and patient, but also sure of her values, able to say "no" and the little girl could 100% rely on her steadfast Nanny, and her love, like being her second Mom. Grandma had a profound philosophy behind this. You can only deeply love a few dolls (people), you best develop your phantasy without an overload of ready made things, and children need to be engaged in continuous playing that they've invested in, plays that goes on for weeks and months and years, developing with the child, not being distracted all the time. Children can learn about long haul and resourcefulness in their playing. Children should be protected from overwhelm. If they have more things than they easily can put away in their right places, then they have too much things. Right places are for example that dolls know where to sleep, cars in their garages, plush toys in their cosy corners. Everything has to have their proper place so that mess can easily be cleaned up.

Their enabling behavior could be a direct relation to the health issues: makes your heart sick!

Worse thing my parents did put of the kindness of their heart was give me money when i was struggling (because of my own stupidity) once they stopped helping me i learned. Now ive fixed my stupid money problems. Self supportive, successful at work. Best thing parents can do for their children is let them figure out how to get out of their own pickle

Sell the house out from underneath them.

SELL THE HOUSE AND KICK THEM OUT.

This was a great episode I loved it

I would be embarrassed if my parents did this for me.

This podcast is 1000% truth!!