Tim Dillon Show: Tim's Depressing Thanksgiving (Audio) 

Anyone who says “let me tell you something” while lighting a cigarette is going through it. LMAO

Thanksgiving is a real knife fight

One Thanksgiving when I was a teenager they scheduled me to work but when I got there they told me they didn't need me. So I got a family meal with turkey and sides from Boston Market went home got as high as Elon musk on a rocket and ate the entire meal. The rest of my family had gone to some family members house. The only Thanksgiving I've had alone and it was the best one.

To Tim's point, my family and I went to a very good Thanksgiving buffet at a hotel one year because my dad was in surgery in the hospital across the street. He died a month later. Had we not gone out for dinner, he may have lived. Life in the Big City.

Epic rant. Dude you need to go live in mainland China for a little bit. The stories you would comeback with would priceless.

This happened at my restaurant. A guy had a seizure at the beginning of Easter brunch and the family waited for him to be stretchered out into an ambulance before coming back in and ordering their food and eating.

"Rogan loves it" 🤣

ARMIN! WHERE ARE YOU?!

I needed this one today. Thanks Tim.

Tim pitching the plot to one of those weird 90s comedies.

"Armeen, i'm wet!!"

Love Tim. He may name drop Rogan every show. But I love his stuff!

Tim Dillon is my Paul Harvey

I lived in calabasas and my girl worked at that restaurant she told me so many crazy stories. Food is alright not worth the drive and especially not worth the price. Boa is way better or was at least I’m poor now so I don’t know

I was in clackamas county jail a few years back Thanksgiving and I'm not kidding when I say that I daydream about how good that whole meal was.. I had never been so grateful for a good meal in my life. In america the prison system is mandated to celebrate Thanksgiving and they honestly spare no expense. In contrast some of the food they eat everyday come in a box CLEARLY labeled "not for human consumption...

the funniest story i've ever heard

You are just the funniest comedian, but bet your fucking hard work to live with, so because we don’t live with you, we love you.

Armene!!!!!! 😂😂

I be damned!!!

Best Thanksgiving story ever. I once went out to dinner for Halloween & it was the most depressing thing ever. I thought it would be a good change. Instead of partying lets have a nice meal with a good friend. But everyone around us looked depressed. Especially one couple. They looked like 2 nerds. They didn't even talk to each other. He was a lame Dracula & she was a unhealthy looking Medusa. Even hear snakes on the head were limp.

Woulda been betteh at bahstin mahkit

Taco Bell gettin tough...😂

🤣