Friend of mine went up to a fat bird in a pub He said, 'Excuse me pet, do you have a pen'? With a smile she replied 'Sure I have'. 'Well', he said, 'Does the farmer know you've escaped from it'?
I was a professional church musician for 60 years. What strikes terror into any organist's heart is when the bride says "O, by the way, I have this friend who sings."
Guys, HERE is Our TRUE Savior YaH The Heavenly FATHER HIMSELF was Who they Crucified for our sins and “HERE IS THE PROOF” From the Ancient Egyptian Semitic: "Yad He Vav He" is what Moshe (Moses) wrote, when Moses asked YaH His Name (Exodus 3) Ancient Egyptian Semitic Direct Translation Yad - "Behold The Hand" He - "Behold the Breath" Vav - "Behold The NAIL"
I went to a wedding a few years ago in Indonesia and to prove how good his English was, the DJ sang Please Release Me by Englebert Humperdink. Most of the Indonesians were really impressed with his English but I was almost on the floor cracking up
I just listened to it. It gets worse with every line, going from “I don’t love you anymore” to “her lips are warm while yours are cold” then “you’d be a fool to cling to me” 💀
True Story. I got married in 1987. We hired a friend's band to play the reception. We wanted our first dance to be to "Almost Paradise". Our friend assured us they could play it. Fast forward to the wedding day, we go to have our first dance, and the band starts playing a different song than what we asked for. My first dance at my wedding was to "Help Me Make it Through the Night".
@@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr2823 They were actually a really good band. In retrospect, I think he just wasn't paying much attention when I was talking about wanting that song and forgot all about it.
I had the organist play "The Final Countdown" right before everyone walked in. This was in 2000...he didn't know the song, and I had to do some serious searching to find that sheet music back then so he could play it.
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I had a band with a drummer I've known so long, the guy asked us how long we'd been married. Nope, we were smart. Just wait til you really want to divorce them, save some time.
I'm a wedding DJ... I just about died laughing. The words I dread hearing is "we just don't want to do what everyone else does".....oh the song choices. lol
ROFLMAOx10!!!!!! I got flashbacks to December 1993 and met the man who became my husband. When the conversation started to lag, he said his side job was working as a D.J. and spent about 20 minutes telling me some of his experiences at wedding receptions.
"Yesterday... all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it seems as though they're here to stay, oh I believe in yesterday." My ex-wife actually suggested that for a wedding. Probably would actually have been good for a laugh.
I'd go for it. Lol Btw, really funny movie about that called "Yesterday." Somehow the Beatles never existed. But one guy knows all their stuff. So he tries to play it for his parents to constant interruptions. Lol
Many years ago I was asked to create a tape for a coworker's wedding. He and his bride to be came over to my house one night and picked out all of the music that was to be played. As they turnerd to face the congregation and start back down the aisle....Olivia Newton-John's "Physical"! THAT had everybody laughing like crazy.
The best wedding song ever written? “If you wanna be happy For the rest of your life, Never make a pretty woman your wife, So from my personal point of view, Get an ugly girl to marry you.”- Get An Ugly Girl To Marry You
My mom played this at her wedding, as she had a constant joke about it when she was trying to find a guy. I think she's beautiful, but at the time, she couldn't find a guy, so she vowed she would play this at her wedding.
I told a college girlfriend about this song because it's funny. She was not amused and got mad at me. I didn't marry her (or anybody else). I now have the song on the rotation of MP3s that I play in my car.
3 года назад
@@MikeV8652 Marrying her would've been a BIG mistake. Sounds like a typical feminazi.
@ She wasn't a feminazi. She was a traditionalist who thought that women were "sugar and spice and everything nice," meaning above any honest evaluation.
True story: My brother was DJ for a wedding in the late 80's. He had a little too much Champagne before the ceremony and played "Puff the Magic Dragon" as the Bride walked down the aisle. I kid you not it was the most hilarious moment never caught on film.
I saw a dog trying to jump on young cows and a donkey came in from.WAY WAY off in the fields, just walked up to the dog...and he came over, and then the donkey brayed right in his face! I've taken care of dogs for 35 years. I've never seen one move so quickly. Under the fence like it wasn't there and under the porch.
@@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr2823 I want to believe you, really I do. But you forgot to start your comment with "True story". That failure renders the entire comment dubious and suspect. Signed, Random guy
@@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr2823 Donkeys are actually brought in to protect csttle from wild dogs as they can crush them with their front legs. They are very protective and can live upwards of 60 years. One of the most understated creatures on a farm.
Bride walks down the aisle "Here i go again on my own. Goin down the only road ive ever known. like a dreamer i was born to walk alone, and i've made up my mind!!!! "
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"HA-HA!!! HEE-HEE!!!!! HO-HO!!!!! To the FUNNY FARM!!!!! Where life is beautiful ALL THE TIME!!!!! And I'll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats and their COMING TO TAKE ME AWAY HA-HA!!!!!" BWAHAHAHAAHHAAAA!!!!!
"I can't get no satisfaction!" "I wish that I had Jessie's girl!" "She's a super freak!!!!" "Hey, you're a crazy b!t¢h" "Hello darkness, my old friend"
"I want you. I need you, but there ain't no way I'm ever ganna love you, so don't be sad, 'cause two out of three ain't bad!" True story...DJ played this at a friend's wedding.
Guys, HERE is Our TRUE Savior YaH The Heavenly FATHER HIMSELF was Who they Crucified for our sins and “HERE IS THE PROOF” From the Ancient Egyptian Semitic: "Yad He Vav He" is what Moshe (Moses) wrote, when Moses asked YaH His Name (Exodus 3) Ancient Egyptian Semitic Direct Translation Yad - "Behold The Hand" He - "Behold the Breath" Vav - "Behold The NAIL"
@bigray1999 aw, you’re offended that some of us can laugh without crude humor? This is coming from someone who watches both kinds of comedians. Grow up! Not everyone has the same taste. What a miserable existence you lead.
True story: Went to a wedding reception featuring a DJ for music. He played some current tunes, but dialed up Frank Sinatra for background. Just before the bride was to address the gathering, Frank slid into "The lady is a tramp". Three people fell over each other trying to reach the mixing console while the crowd collapsed laughing.
Rawk4Life: At my wedding (assuming I find Miss Right someday), I've got a contingency plan if an ex-girlfriend shows up. I'll ask my bride to walk down the aisle to "Love Bites (So Do I)" by Halestorm. (Look it up; it actually would work pretty well in that situation, lol!)
@@shadow_ax "Love Bites" by Def Leppard would also work...at least at those weddings where everyone in the pews is wondering, "What the h... are they thinkin'..?" :-)
It’s shocking how often weddings feature “Marry You” by Bruno Mars. “We’re looking for something dumb to do, hey baby, I think I wanna marry you…If we wake up and you Wanna break up, that's cool No, I won't blame you It was fun, girl” So romantic 😬
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@@nctpti2073 I HATE that song because it makes NO sense. "I would do anything for love, but I won't cheat on you" is a sentence that only makes sense if you change the word "but" to "and". Why can't people understand this? Now, let's say your partner is into receiving oral anal sex, which you find disgusting (loosely based on a true story, lol)... in that case, the song lyrics would make total sense. The difference being it's something your partner WANTS you to do, but you won't do it, no matter how much you love them. Unless Meatloaf's lady DOES actually want him to cheat on her and he doesn't want to... that's the only way the song makes sense... but I'm pretty sure that's not the case. Otherwise, I have much respect for Meatloaf's talent, and even this song is great musically and vocally, it's just the lyrics that drive me insane.
@@TieDyeVikki You are making the mistake of assuming a person is only capable of loving one person at a time and that love is some sort of completely conscious choice. When you accept that a person can love more than one person at a time, then it makes sense. He loves her and will be true to her, no matter how he may feel about anyone else. Someone else he loves might want him to be with them instead of the woman he is with, whom he is singing to, but, even though he also loves that second person, he won't do that.
Make it a medley. Add Golden Ring by Tammy Wynette and George Jones. Followed up by You're the Reason Our Kids Are Ugly by Conway Twitty and Loretta Lynn.
My band played Steve Miller’s “Mary Lou” at a friend’s wedding. That the marriage did not last 18 months is not because we played the song; we played the song because it was obvious the marriage was not gonna last 18 months
Played a lot of weddings in the late 70's and there were two songs that people must have chosen by the titles without ever listening to the words: "Isn't She Lovely?" (which is about a newborn baby), and "Looks Like We Made It" (which is about a couple that split up.)
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Oh my god!! I can’t believe I’m getting this guy in my recommended videos!! My teachers used to show videos of this guy when I was in elementary school!! God those were the days.
"Lord, I was born a Ramblin' Man Tryna make a livin' and doin' the best I can And when it's time for leavin', I hope you'll understand That I was born a Ramblin' Man"
Or bad husband. I've known a few of em as my brothers in law, who abused my sisters, lived double lives, cheated, had secret kids, and abandoned their own kids. Highway to hell would been a good song for them.
I was at a wedding when the first song the band played for slow dancing was... Yesterday. Yesterday all my troubles seemed so far away now it looks as though they're here to stay Oh I believe in Yesterday... On a dare maybe??
I was at a wedding where they played Free Bird by Lynyrd Skynyrd as one of the dance songs... "If I leave here tomorrow, would you still remember me?" It lasted a couple of years...
@@ednutter7653 omg at my baby sister's funeral, they played Free Bird, but forgot to edit out the gunshot in the end! Holey majoley, we just about fainted, then started laughing. My baby sis would have LOVED it! LOL
I once played a wedding where the bride and groom requested I sing their favorite songs as they separately approached the altar. Her favorite was "My Way", which starts out "And now, the end is near." The groom's favorite was "Release Me" (Please release me let me go, for I don't love you anymore). No idea if they're still married or not.
At my own wedding, I had gone for a piss, and standing at the urinal, the DJ played his first song... "Release Me." It was followed by 18 years of abuse, and a divorce that went on for seven years, and cost me personally $150k. I haven't spoken to her since she called the cops alleging IPV. I remember it as "our song."
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I actually started choking, and I wasn't drinking anything!!! All Tim Hawkins videos should have this at the beginning..... WARNING Choking Hazard: Do not eat or drink anything while watching the following clip.