We moved into a new, slightly larger home three years ago. Upon meeting the neighbor, she wanted a tour. I hadn't yet bought other things to take up the extra space. She said, "It's like a hotel." I took it as a huge compliment, as hotels are relaxing, just for the reasons you two mentioned. I'm trying to get back that feeling. But this time, as I declutter, I'm not shopping to replace the empty space. I'm just reaching the point of being ready to make a few purchases, to set up my 'landing zone' and paper handling center. You two are so inspiring that I did more decluttering as I listened to the podcast :) Cas, I'm thrilled to have found you, and happy you decided to make a channel dedicated to the podcast.
We will be doing that soon! I look forward to our new space looking less cluttered!! (The biggest mess is my craft room!?) We’re not planning on buying to fill it, either!?
I’ve become really good at using things I buy and have. I don’t spend anymore - only on groceries. But I have clutter from hobbies, home repair, collections, reselling items. I think most of the hoarding happens when you have hobbies that you don’t make time for. It ultimately comes down to making firm decisions and asking yourself “Do I really plan on reading these books again?” and just say no and take action by getting rid of them asap to see the space cleared out.
My home is not that cluttered on the how serious is the clutter scale. My issues for the stuck items is decision fatigue. I had 2 chairs that prevented me from putting my car in the garage. I finally pulled the trigger and had a truck hall it away.i have a car that needs to go to the junkyard. I pulled the trigger on getting rid of it. It is a lack of decision making for me. Now I am challenging myself to make hard decions on a daily basis. There was always a reason, or an excuse, or lack of information, or not knowing how to solve the issue. There was an attachment issue but also a helpless/ hopeless aspect of it. I am pushing through one decisions at a time. My home is just messy enough to feel ashamed to have people over into my cave. It is the motivation to stay messy. The minute I downsize and organize, I pull a ton of stuff out and start over with a new mess to keep people out.
Your comments really sparked some soul-searching of my own clutter habits. Thank you!! And congratulations for getting those 2 chairs out of the way! 😊
"A hard decision a day" sounds so wise, and so brave. That's probably what I need to do next, kill one excuse maker task a day until I feel free. Thank you for such an insightful comment!
I’m 52 & have come to realise I am really not good at problem solving either or persevering until I get the result I want. I feel helpless and hopeless as well. I think its a pattern from childhood. I am trying to retrain myself and tell myself I can solve problems as well as the next person and to persevere until I come up with a solution and then see it through with action.
Yass! My house was not over cluttered for most people. I had a below average amount of things in ALLL areas. However, it is way over my clutter threshold for my season of life and it took taking out 50-60 bags of stuff to really make some change in how well day to day functioning happens here. I wasn't really aware I had that much "extra" but we did and it was impeding everything in ways I wasn't aware of until after it was gone.
Oh Cas, you are probably going to get sick of me commenting. Lol. Tracy just spoke about being triggered and going shopping. (Sheepishly raising my hand) My way of combating this, I have lists on my Amazon and Walmart accounts. I perurse and add things to my different lists. I don't buy. I just add them to a list. When I declutter my accounts, emails etc on my phone...9/10 items that I've added to lists, are deleted. 1. I didn't waste money. 2. I got it out of my system in the moment. 3. Yes, it may seem like I wasted time. So it's not for everyone. But...4. when I declutter my phone, it helps to see, "Oh that's actually a good idea" or what was I thinking. Deleting a shopping list, doesn't affect you financially, emotionally. It does take time. But 5. When you physically aren't up to dealing with actual stuff, decluttering digitally is an accomplishment too!
I also do this,with this method you own the item in your mind, you completely feel that and when you have totally loved it, you just start to delete, delete, delete and 2-3 items remain at the end and either you buy them or you delete them too 😅
I'm one of those who would 'organized', and even declutter. But then I'd buy and bring new things into my home. A wonderful book is helping me: To Buy Or Not To Buy, author April Lane Benson, PhD. It is written for compulsive shoppers, and has a lot of insight.
If you can't de-clutter for yourself, at least do it for your children, so they don't have to sort through junk along with everything else when you're gone.
@@vanessabogaert2104Me also! They are interstate and have been in the same home since after the first of four children. My sister in law is 62! That's a lot of clutter!!!!
Thanks for sharing the podcasts here. I'm not much of a podcast listener but to watch while being motivated to do other things at the same time is great! Keep them coming!
Back in dec 2020 my Landlord decided to need the apartments for family use - I had to pack up quickly and made fast decisions on: donate and keep and few storage boxes ! so by May 2021 I moved into a beautiful spacious 1 Bedroom apartment- the old place was so tiny that I had stored a lot of my belongings- when I moved in and sat with my new bedroom set - I felt calm and peaceful- … but I still missed ‘my stuff’ which is part of me and who I am - I missed books and craft supplies I had to finally dissolve the storage unit since I couldn’t afford it - since my new place was $300 more Now 2 years later I’m still working on decluttering- I’m feeling confident that I’ll get there as I’m growing‘decluttering muscle’ but with fibromyalgia I know my limits- when I know I’m gearing up for a session on weekends- I always rev up my engine by listening to you Cas and Dana and Dawn etc - thank you❤
Im minimalist, but to keep it minimal, decluttering has to be a lifestile. Especialy with children... I always have a donation box or bag in my closest, once is full, its gone.
I really relate to the clutter magnet concept. I have no problem decluttering and have minimized our home to a place that I’m happy with. But I still find myself over buying.
🌸🌺🌸you said it I am getting less overwhelmed as I do what you all are teaching me, love listening to you all, pushing through is hard, my husband is now listening, he going to push me, can’t wait to see what 2024 Goals we accomplished 🙏🙏🙏🤗🤗🤗💕💕💕
Thank you for this life-changing, affirming interview, Cas & Tracy!! Why is that until I started following you, and the Take Back Your House crew, that I had no idea it was all about having too much STUFF and clnging too hard.
Great video Cas and Tracy! Any suggestions for a lot, a lot of magazines? All country, mags. Decorating the vintage way, I just love French Country Antiques Shabby Chic etc. lol they make me happy and I actually pray that I can have this kind of house. My problem is that I just love pretty things! 🫢 ty both my appreciated Linda, Pa.
I think it was the minimalists who I just heard say that just because I like it doesn't mean I have to own it. Maybe enjoy the experience of going to antique stores or flea markets with friends to look at things that make you happy and then walk away.
Agree with the window shopping without buying, AND having a curated collection to make your home more like an art gallery instead of a hoard. Unfortunately if a room is stuffed with pretty things they all get lost, vs picking out a few key treasures to really shine 💗
🌸🌺🌸I hate shopping, so glad I don’t shop, I just buy the good things for our body better foods or use my money on eating out, I still wear hand me downs
My brain so wants to declutter everything. But my daughter went off to college and everything seems important to keep. The thought of getting rid of her artwork makes me feel like a bad mom. It’s so complicated I can’t find the words to explain it. My house is neat, things have their spaces, but it still feels like too much, but I can’t give the things away b/c it feels like another loss. Does that make sense?
I need to find a balance between empty & full. I don't like the echo that happens when rooms in my home are empty. I try to fill them. But it gets too full. Balance
May I ask what should I say to myself when I want to decide whether to keep or toss/donate a item. when I think I have it ready when I need it (I was always on my own and don’t a lot of disposal money). Beside, feeling good to save money. the reward to save that amount of money by keeping those items to use. Saving money is one of top principle / guidance in life. So getting rid of stuff goes agonist the principle. What can I say to myself to move forward? Or more efficient in getting rid of excess pls.
Many questions depending on what the item is. Different angles of thinking and advice will resonate with you the more you listen read and watch about decluttering. Your situation usually directs what you acquire too much of, for instance, tinned food if you worry about the weather preventing you to get more food. A scarcity mindset can be inherited. There's always a reason for bringing stuff in and if it's bulk buying to get a deal sometimes you just can't use it up fast enough so it actually is not a deal. A bulk pack of 6 pair of socks might wear out faster than one pair of expensive socks. When your house gets overwhelming the saying "Use it up, wear it out, make do or do without" only helps with bringing more in but does not help with clearing stuff out. Money wise- You spent the money when you bought the thing, so if it does not serve you; you are no poorer without it and no richer by donating/tossing it. It's always better to donate than garbage it, yet EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY ends up as landfill. I ask myself if a stranger could be more happy with this thing than the happiness it gives me. I also now ask myself if I'm being SELFISH by hanging onto something somebody else could benefit from. Mice or bugs or water damage or sunlight fading can ruin stuff we hang onto when somebody else could have benefitted. Things get musty when they are jammed into cupboards. Do you feel like a good steward of your things? Practical things can "spark joy" even if they are not beautiful so you have to ask what value is this thing giving me. Things are not neutral, they are either giving value to you or taking away from you. Sometimes we have things for such a long time we think they are worth more than they are currently selling for. Definitely look at eBay and the like to compare items similar to your own. If you list items give yourself a time limit of selling then donate. Ask yourself what you actually want your home to feel like inside. The question is so simple that it is really hard: Do you need space to getaround? More light? Relaxed spaciousness? Ease of cleaning is usually key. If anything for whatever reason is difficult to wipe off/wipe down/ vaccuum under then the space is too congested. Do you know every single item in your inventory? If saving money is your top principle ask the 5 why's each time- why is it your top principle then why is that reason your reason, try to ask why 5 layers deep and the end conclusion is usually the real issue or heart of the matter. If the whole place burned down what would you actually replace? Does the stuff you have serve you or are you serving it? Blessing or burden? I wanted to walk in my front door and feel relaxed about what I see but my idea of identity sabotaged it for 23 years. I didn't need to have a piano and an art cupboard to be a good Mom, or 7 book shelves because I'm a reader, antiques because I like the style, or all the things that displayed who I am. My house does not need to be a museum of who I am. My house does not need to be a mini supermarket or a hardware store. Fear is over rated.
⚫ Do I use this / have multiple of them? ⚫ Would somebody else benefit more from this than me? ⚫ What's this item actually worth now? (A fraction of what you paid for it, so it may be easier to let go) ⚫ What is this item costing me? (Storage space, any bad emotions, heating/cooling etc. AKA Would you pay for a storage locker in order to keep it? If not, why keep it in your home?) I hope these help 😊
Decor is aesthetic - and can make you happy - whether you have the Christian/Pagan beliefs behind it or not. How many kids/people do you know that love colouring eggs and eating chocolate whether they get the meanings or not 🤷♀️
@@cherylkalsch5107 Easter is also a secular "yay for chocolate" festival, likewise Christmas with new toys. I don't bash on the Christians for stealing all the Pagan holidays every time they wanna celebrate too 🤷♀️ Just let each to their own, and if you are a Christian, "turn the other cheek". Jesus had so many teachings of tolerance and being a good person, yet so many seem to forget them with their actions as they nitpick others. I was raised going to church and Sunday school, and reading the bible and praying before bed. It just wasn't the right path for me. I'd rather marvel at nature and science, and try to be a kind human. (Which is ironically more in line with various religions' teachings 🤔). When you find yourself angry, look inwards at "what insecurity of mine has caused this reaction?" It's very telling and has put me in my place many times. We all stand to learn a lot of life lessons. 😊
It's not the stuff that makes you feel certain way. it's your perception of the stuff and the thoughts you think about the stuff. Houses but don't have the anxiety that you're talkin about. The differences when they see all their stuff they don't tell themselves bad things about themselves.
