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trad wives are indentured servants? - life after trad wife [broke, homeless, regret] 

Manifestelle
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In this episode, Elle discusses the real experiences of women who made the choice to become tradwives, only to find themselves facing financial and emotional struggles. Elle brings attention to stories of women who ended up regretting their decisions to drop out of college, give up their careers, and become financially dependent on their partners. She highlights the importance of financial autonomy and the potential pitfalls of rushing into marriage and motherhood without a backup plan. Elle encourages listeners to continue their education, develop their careers, and secure their financial independence regardless of their relationship status. Elle also addresses societal pressures that rush women into early marriage and motherhood, advising her listeners not to believe in the fear of 'expiration'. She emphasizes that education and autonomous decision-making should not be sacrificed in the race against time. She touches upon the options available for non-working spouses in terms of financial planning, such as Spousal IRAs and Spousal Lifetime Access Trusts (SLATs), urging her listeners to always secure their financial futures. Elle also brings up the harsh reality of how some women are forced to walk away from their marriages with nothing due to cultural, subcultural, and familial expectations and pressures. In conclusion, Elle encourages her listeners to stay alert, make informed decisions, and always prioritize their personal growth and financial independence.

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12 мар 2024

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Комментарии : 2,2 тыс.   
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
Click here sbird.co/47UFiaJ and use my code MANIFESTELLE to get 55% OFF your first month at Scentbird. What's your favorite fragrance? Comment below!
@GoddessG4ng
@GoddessG4ng 2 месяца назад
It doesn’t show the ingredients, unless the ingredients are what’s listed such as coconut. I have very sensitive skin and have to avoid chemicals aka anything that says “fragrance”
@cathylake9072
@cathylake9072 2 месяца назад
So true where is Kate???. What happened to Diana??? Never depend on a man.
@ari3lz3pp
@ari3lz3pp 2 месяца назад
If you're smart and mindful about who you partner with as a wife you won't be caught in trouble like this.
@ifyouknowyouknow6964
@ifyouknowyouknow6964 2 месяца назад
Let’s say the truth here…. Cuz I was in the same situation… there were 100 percent warning signs but these women including myself ignored tf out of them… do not and this is in relation to the other video of being in feminine energy. The moment you feel masculine or like you are taking care of a child get the fuuuuuuh out. The second you feel ugly around that person leeeeaaave, because they are going to tell you they will change but they won’t. Usually these people will suck you dry and or poison you in some way, stop the sex, stop sleeping next to each other and although you might have to go masculine for a while in order to protect yourself , you have to. And you gotta go. The other video you had about finding the right men and how they are out there is true…men always know how to figure shit out if he expects you to figure shit out of asks what you bring to the table dip tf out .
@vogtrina
@vogtrina Месяц назад
College will NOT always be there for you my grandma is 70 at 60 she got her degree no one wants to hire her she is too old to work
@7Mushrooms7
@7Mushrooms7 2 месяца назад
People forget that the influencer trad wife arent traditional trad wives. They are influencers, that's their job and how they make their money.
@wyleecoyotee4252
@wyleecoyotee4252 2 месяца назад
They just cosplay
@sbfairy
@sbfairy 2 месяца назад
Yes! This!
@Nashae-kz5bc
@Nashae-kz5bc 2 месяца назад
Facts!!!
@Tigerlily242
@Tigerlily242 2 месяца назад
Alt right influencers at that
@emzuli7432
@emzuli7432 2 месяца назад
Phyllis Schlafly, the original tradwife influencer, was a raging hypocrite. She not only never gave up her career as an attorney, she galavanted all over the country telling women to do the exact opposite of what she was doing.
@valeriab4100
@valeriab4100 2 месяца назад
Not only the husband can cheat or leave, because there are amazing husbands and beautiful men out there, but they could get sick, disabled, fired, bankrupt, or God forbid, pass away. I hate when someone tells women to ALWAYS have a B plan or financial security and people scream "you think all men are bad!! feminist agenda!!"" blah blah, no it's just common sense
@PinkyMcPinksAlot
@PinkyMcPinksAlot 2 месяца назад
Exactly! Apparently very few people stop and think about why various forms of insurance even exist. Its because we cannot prevent life's problems with wishful thinking! So why not provide your family w resources such as life insurance should life not go as planned?? But the fairytale propaganda around marriage encourages immature people to think they are at the finish line of "happily ever after."
@ah5721
@ah5721 2 месяца назад
I agree , your man may not cheat or leave. my husband is type one diabetic insulin dependent his health is a balancing act . I'm trying to get a better paying job so in case something bad happens to him I won't have to live with family for a while. One gal I know had her husband pass away of cancer at only 30 she has only worked one job. she has 4 kids, her husband was a good man and friend of mine .
@electricpocky5493
@electricpocky5493 2 месяца назад
Exactly! My family's going through the worse case scenario with my brother and his wife. She stopped her education, and decided to stay home to be a trad wife while my brother promised to take care of everything. My other siblings and I wanted her to at least look into taking classes or getting some side income just in case, but they thought everything would be fine forever. My brother is now entirely paralyzed from ALS, and we have to help my sister-in-law take care of the kids, and sign-up for assistance. It's a nightmare.
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
My dad just died but thank God my mom is a nurse. We would have been homeless if she was a trad wife with no career and prospects. Even when my dad was going through his disease in the hospital her income is what helped him live longer than expected too. Men die faster so women no doubt have to have a job and be financially literate.
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
​@@PinkyMcPinksAlotEven with some insurance widow relief isn't enough to pay the bills unless the widow has extra income from their career
@hippie1252
@hippie1252 2 месяца назад
There's a reason the women before us fought so hard for divorce. Remember that.
@MrsSurrealista
@MrsSurrealista 2 месяца назад
THIS.
@gorannashreen2822
@gorannashreen2822 2 месяца назад
FAX
@MakiPcr
@MakiPcr 2 месяца назад
And owning property
@14omoon
@14omoon 2 месяца назад
Right! The older I get, the more I realize how important the women's liberation movement was
@creengton8594
@creengton8594 2 месяца назад
Also after divorce was legalised, husband poisonings suspiciously went down 👀
@dj_bae
@dj_bae 2 месяца назад
The man you divorce will be a completely different person than the man you married. Believe it and protect yourself.
@HumairaAfra-qx5tv
@HumairaAfra-qx5tv 2 месяца назад
This is so true.
@sarahlpw
@sarahlpw 2 месяца назад
Underrated comment!
@KOKOKOKfjeij
@KOKOKOKfjeij 2 месяца назад
+ He'll be everything he never was for you for the woman that comes after
@kiwiwooq
@kiwiwooq 2 месяца назад
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
@summersultra
@summersultra 2 месяца назад
Yikes.
@crystocious6715
@crystocious6715 2 месяца назад
Trad-wife is cosplay. It’s not how women actually lived in the 50s. If it was so great, why was the 60s such a movement? They weren’t happy with their roles.
@wyleecoyotee4252
@wyleecoyotee4252 2 месяца назад
She wouldn't have a credit card .
@TheShamuraja
@TheShamuraja 2 месяца назад
Yeah 😄💅🏻 A great show about this is: "Why women kill".
@_politefrog_8892
@_politefrog_8892 2 месяца назад
A huge amount had to be drugged up on coke and opioids to get through it mentally
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe 2 месяца назад
There are jokes and memes on TikTok about trad wives in the 1800s-1900s celebrating the deaths of their abusive husbands (whether from war or disease). Like I don’t understand how anti-feminist women hate on feminists for giving them the autonomy to choose traditional roles and to speak up about it when women aren’t even allowed to speak at work meetings in other countries
@decoraqueena6413
@decoraqueena6413 2 месяца назад
The women that are cos playing trad wives on tiktok are imitating the ideal 50s housewife as promoted by the adverts of that time. You know, the adverts that were totally unrealistic and in no way reflected the real housewives of that time.
@daebak_hana
@daebak_hana 2 месяца назад
My mom was a trad wife. She had a degree and a very good seamstress. My dad decided he wanted a woman 20 yrs younger after being married for almost 25 yrs. My mom got nothing in the divorce because she was always a doormat and just signed the papers. Shes been broke ever since. I learned a harsh life lesson from that. Ive always have my own money and career no matter my relationship status.
@ragsrare3771
@ragsrare3771 2 месяца назад
I’m always hear these men say that they wouldn’t leave or cheat yet I turn to reality and see other things. I always value reality over these lying hypocrites men.
@ifinditinteresting.8709
@ifinditinteresting.8709 2 месяца назад
@@ragsrare3771 they would just victim blame.
@ihanakaunotar2741
@ihanakaunotar2741 2 месяца назад
Funny is the men say that women need to choose their partners better, yet when woman screws them over they’re all about how laws are crap etc.
@Mira-gu6we
@Mira-gu6we 2 месяца назад
He will get his karma.
@redleeks6253
@redleeks6253 2 месяца назад
​@@Mira-gu6we he really wont. He lived his best years by using a woman for 25 years and then using other. Men see women as objects and all men will eventually replace their spouse for a better younger version if they can afford it. Sometimes they'll keep both the old wife who's still serving and the young one as mistress. Whatever 'karma' he gets doesn't change the damage he caused. His first wife is already being 'punished' and he's out there waiting for karma
@pri.sci.lla.
@pri.sci.lla. 2 месяца назад
Giving someone the power to feed you is also giving them the power to starve you. I refuse to be in such a dependent and vulnerable position. Financial independence is in so many ways the only independence that matters.
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
Don't marry someone you can't trust then
@caissafrass6631
@caissafrass6631 2 месяца назад
@@Someone-qi1rrno, never ever go in without a backup plan. People who you think you can trust can betray you. They can also lose their livelihoods, or die. Another person is not a life plan. You absolutely need to have your own shit and your own plans.
@saltedcharm8656
@saltedcharm8656 2 месяца назад
Many of you saying this would give the government the same control. The irony.
@xsophia22x
@xsophia22x 2 месяца назад
@@saltedcharm8656would you be willing to do a prenup for your wife that in case of divorce she would get a house and 24 month of paid expenses for her to get on her feet after divorce? My hubby did it,word on the street is that 99% of man refused to prove that they are indeed are trust worthy. What a irony😅
@nairamatsolo8590
@nairamatsolo8590 2 месяца назад
Government will not say they love u and then leave u and ur kids homeless why they have another woman​@@saltedcharm8656
@ashwinidhamodharan9694
@ashwinidhamodharan9694 2 месяца назад
I agree. I’m Indian and a common theme in Indian movies is men go for these modern girls (western clothes, educated, independent) and after marriage she’s expected to give that all up and only wear sarees and traditional clothes. I think it’s so unfair. If you want a traditional girl date a traditional girl. Don’t go for modern girls and expect them to be traditional. If we do they same thing (go for a broke, skinny guy and expect him to be rich and buff right after marriage), we’d be called dumb. I know women with masters in tech but after 20 years of being a housewife they can’t work for their degree anymore. I think it’s dumb to completely depend on a guy
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
I liked hearing your insight from India! I will have to watch some of these movies.
@LoXena
@LoXena 2 месяца назад
Even the traditional women are miserable. I used to live in a traditional Christian community and it did NOT looked good. I could sense that as a teenager how bitter they were while simultaneously shaming teenagers and younger women. It is an act. The cognitive dissonance is strong. And the husbands are either cheating, either closeted, either violent.
@arivrindazhakshura9529
@arivrindazhakshura9529 2 месяца назад
​@EasyPeasyVegan such themes are insanely normalised in India. Girls who don't switch to the traditional values are often portrayed as antagonists/Villaness. Even if the heroine is a working woman, she wakes up early in the morning, does all the housework, cooks and cleans for a joint family, isn't opinionated, very soft spoken, views and serves her husband as her God. She also does her job well lol, but she isnt in any high position. The only redeeming part is that the husband may not be abusive and respects his wife as a person, but the relationship dynamic is still very patriarchal, husband makes the decisions.
@boxingelfis1499
@boxingelfis1499 2 месяца назад
I think it's the aspect of not caring about whom you are marrying and just focusing on how attracted to her you are. Some of us dudes, unfortunately, forego reservations or red flags that we may have when dating ladies we find very attractive. When marriage happens, that's when you find these reservations coming into play as uncrossable boundaries and attempts to change wives into their own ideal wife because they weren't thinking about who they were marrying let alone dating.
@michelleh.5225
@michelleh.5225 2 месяца назад
So true, there was actually a Muslim guy saying this exact thing on Twitter ages ago. Like... it doesn't make logical sense. Men like that are just resentful of independent women because they know that they are not a desirable romantic partner and so they have to shame a valuable woman into being with them.
@spikey0245
@spikey0245 2 месяца назад
The very dangerous thing about trad wive influencers is that they aren’t even dependent on their husband. They live on that influencer income but cosplay as unemployed house wives and try to promote it to young women without talking about back up plans.🙄
@oluwakemitoluwanimi7203
@oluwakemitoluwanimi7203 2 месяца назад
Candance Owen ran back to you tube immediately she had her baby. She couldn't even take time to nurse her baby. That means her child is with a baby sitter. Before her last pregnancy she talked about her gen z baby sitter. Yet she is encouraging women to become stay at home mum and shun career while she clutch to her career as an influencer.
@zigzig9938
@zigzig9938 2 месяца назад
I think they aren’t honest that a man has to earn enough money. Many of those trad influencers obviously live in a wealthy environment and owns big kitchens. My husband is the main Warner for now, but I do part time tutoring to earn extra money, because most couples need a dual income to survive.
@summersultra
@summersultra 2 месяца назад
​@@oluwakemitoluwanimi7203 Can we just talk about Candace? There is so much to unpack there.
@suzy1750
@suzy1750 2 месяца назад
@@oluwakemitoluwanimi7203 So funny (and true!) I was thinking about her when I was watching this!
@janicefinch3563
@janicefinch3563 2 месяца назад
Estee Williams doesn't even make money from her social media. Also most of them aren't telling women not to make any money at all. They acknowledge that many traditional women in the past have had at home businesses. It's about prioritizing the family.
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe 2 месяца назад
These men who want to cut the wings of the free birds remind me of a f**kboy’s affinity to choosing a girl who wants a committed relationship versus a girl who’s only in it for something casual…even though he only wants something casual 😭
@summersultra
@summersultra 2 месяца назад
Cassie, behave!
@Chillikilli
@Chillikilli 2 месяца назад
This!!
@pixelhunter0
@pixelhunter0 2 месяца назад
😂This is some wise ass shit Cassie
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe
@CassieTranthesuperfitbabe 2 месяца назад
@@summersultra "well behaved women seldom make history" - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
@helenapayne3414
@helenapayne3414 Месяц назад
Yes! What’s up with that!? I really don’t get it😅
@katarinacestmoi
@katarinacestmoi 2 месяца назад
The part about men wanting me to give up something for them is so accurate and it’s usually the exact thing that attracted them to me. For example, I’m super fit but they hate how much time I spend at the gym. So … you want a hot girlfriend with a great body, but she can’t go to the gym? Make it make sense.
@giovana4121
@giovana4121 2 месяца назад
Is almost like they want to destroy us, piece by piece.
@ihanakaunotar2741
@ihanakaunotar2741 2 месяца назад
Yep, they have complete unrealistic expectations of women.
@katarinacestmoi
@katarinacestmoi 2 месяца назад
Exactly… I’m supposed to go to bars , eat gross food, and sit and watch sports but still be attractive… hard pass. So glad I learned to love and take care of myself over listening to others.
@canesugar911
@canesugar911 2 месяца назад
Gone girl
@realglutenfree
@realglutenfree 2 месяца назад
Yep, it's like they expect us to just throw up all the food after eating junk food and sitting on the couch with them all day to watch their games.
@boomboomclang
@boomboomclang 2 месяца назад
I used to be a social worker and the tradwife to poverty pipeline is all too real
@ggbellz
@ggbellz 2 месяца назад
wow
@Mana-xd2tp
@Mana-xd2tp Месяц назад
Play stupid games - Win stupid prizes
@lelamaciolek1166
@lelamaciolek1166 Месяц назад
Yikes
@Melly16yr10
@Melly16yr10 17 дней назад
Fucking Hell 😱😡🤬
@adoramae5436
@adoramae5436 2 месяца назад
Here's what confuses me. Are we (millennials to Zennials) not the divorce baby generation? Was the message "never ever ever depend on a man to support you" not drilled into all of us from basically infancy???? I am so confused by this new rise in the idea that you should depend on your spouse with no back up plan because "I can keep them happy, and they won't leave me if i fulfill my role" Don't be a fool. Learn from your foremothers.
@asimpnamedval4950
@asimpnamedval4950 2 месяца назад
I agree with this. It was also something I grew up hearing and something I want to live by. However, I also see that, since a lot of people crave that "perfect nuclear family" they lacked. Even if we grew up hearing about being independent, we also grew up being reminded that OUR house was broken and se were "the odd ones out" So a lot of people try to "make it right" bcs they think they could break that curse without realising they are repeating cycles.
@RaqueLauren
@RaqueLauren 2 месяца назад
The message was actually "women can have it all" which meant trapping us into doing it all. Raising the kids, managing the home, working full time. That dream is a nightmare and women all over are still doing it to this day (50/50 relationships). This explains the going back trying to figure out a better way to live i.e. trad wife or childfree lifestyles etc... Basically women still haven't found the answer yet.
@99stranger99
@99stranger99 2 месяца назад
Omg, thank you and THIS! I feel like we are living in twilight zone, I literally grew up knowing I'd be working and having a career. Since when did the narrative change from make your own future to let it go and be subservient???
@qesther1241
@qesther1241 2 месяца назад
I’m a Jones’s generation (it’s between boomers and millennials;too late for boomers too early for millennials) my parents were boomers and married for life. But both my parents always reminded the girls (only one boy) to always have their own and not depend on a man 100%. My mom worked and so did my dad. But my dad was my mom’s 3rd husband. The first 2 were Tyrones.
@emiliabolsas
@emiliabolsas 2 месяца назад
@@qesther1241… so Gen X? 🤔
@diannholland
@diannholland 2 месяца назад
Ladies, EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT with a rich man, and just a generous man (like My dad), Look up trusts. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! Look up trusts, Study them! Look up IRAs, Study them, and GET YOUR FINANCIAL house in order. Because he may be the greatest guy that ever lived. But if you all did not set this up for yourselves, Because no one lives forever, You could be in danger. Words from my grandmother to you all, (Using the terminology our girl does here.) NOTHING scares a Below-bare-minimum man away from you quicker than a lady who knows how to manage her own finances! And NOTHING attracts Great and worthy men to you faster than a lady who already knows how to handle her finances.
@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534
@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534 2 месяца назад
Look up trust fraud and how to prosecute those who steal you families assets
@jmkwm
@jmkwm 2 месяца назад
Thank you and thanks to your gran for those wise words 🙌
@diannholland
@diannholland 2 месяца назад
@@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534 Agreed on this as well. If you understand trusts and IRAs BEFORE visiting with a financial advisor, you will be SO much better able to know when a snake sits in front of you.
@jessitabonita
@jessitabonita 2 месяца назад
THIS. When I told an XY that I work at an investment firm, he started rambling about day trading like a typical crypto-bro. I smiled and nodded, while internally screaming/scoffing/laughing that day trading and what I do are not the same thing and 90% of daytraders lose money. Because of my education, experience, and FINRA licenses: he lost all credibility and all my respect/desire. 😂
@winning3329
@winning3329 2 месяца назад
Thank bestie
@readin_ritin_rithmetic
@readin_ritin_rithmetic 2 месяца назад
Historically Trad Wife was always a privilege reserved for the elite/upper middle class; it also depended on having a lower class that could be exploited.
@zigzig9938
@zigzig9938 2 месяца назад
I would say in most parts of the world only the wealthy wives could be trad. Most couples can’t afford to survive on one income.
@behawiorystka98
@behawiorystka98 2 месяца назад
And trad wife often had servants, maids and cooks at disposal.
@spiritsafe-ko4ee
@spiritsafe-ko4ee 2 месяца назад
100% there were no black trad wife's in the 50s. The feminists pushing for the right to go to work were all white because the black women were already working.
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
Yeah but even those weathy women can lose everything if she has no sons to inherit her husband's estate, property, mansion, ect. Wealthy trad wives in say the victorian era didn't have it good especially if there was no sons because in many cases only men can inherit property, ect. back then. Women's lives have been held under men's hands for the longest time that even many wise grandmas today will tell their daughters and grand daughters to at least have a career to fall back on.
@tonieja8814
@tonieja8814 2 месяца назад
don't forget that in the past social bonds and observance of certain norms were important, in the past a husband who left his wife was doomed to social ostratism, people did not want to associate with such a person or do business, and it was very difficult to move to another city or state. today a guy doesn't even have the fear of "what people will say about him" he can do whatever he wants
@afrofaeries
@afrofaeries 2 месяца назад
Maybe it's my autism, but for the life of me, I can't understand why some women become stay-at-home wives, girlfriends, or mothers without a backup plan. What if your husband dies in an accident? What if he lost his job and it takes months to get a new one? What if he cheats and it surfaces? What if he turns out to be abusive to you or your loved ones? Ladies, having a backup plan IS NOT masculine, it's being smart. Life doesn't go our way, and sometimes God/the Universe throws unexpected trials. You must always be prepared for everything and trust your gut.
@Hay_Bay
@Hay_Bay 2 месяца назад
Sometimes ppl have mental health issues that keep them in ruts and at home. Most ppl infact
@tan89284
@tan89284 2 месяца назад
It’s not your autism, my autistic friend loves the idea of being a home maker and being 100% reliant on her boyfriend for everything. She laughs and looks down on single women and women who question marriage/children.
@etcwhatever
@etcwhatever 2 месяца назад
Im autistic and i work from home because thats where i feel safe and not going nuts from sensory overload. I also agree with having backup plans (i go a bit overboard with planning 🤣) But i dont trust men at all. My relationships werent good and i didnt understand what was going on half the time. On the other half of the time everything was thrown on me because "im a woman". No thanks
@mako3951
@mako3951 2 месяца назад
​@@tan89284 so she wants to be a pet? I feel like there's no way to look down on others while on a leash 🤔
@afrofaeries
@afrofaeries 2 месяца назад
@@Hay_BayShouldn’t they not be in relationships at all if they have mental health issues?
@AmyJLiang
@AmyJLiang 2 месяца назад
The cage metaphor is so important. So many guys want an accomplished woman only bc they want to be the one who shoots her down. Kinda like how a hunter will brag about the size of the deer he killed but someone who actually loved the deer would build a deer sanctuary. It's not enough to have them be impressed or compliment your accomplishments, they HAVE to nurture your growth. That's where it matters.
@Nitra813
@Nitra813 2 месяца назад
🎯 💯
@noumiiidia
@noumiiidia 2 месяца назад
God that's totally right !!
@adinal1958
@adinal1958 2 месяца назад
Exactly!
@goddammitalana
@goddammitalana Месяц назад
"Deer sanctuary" are you not aware of the massive overpopulation of deer/elk and the impact on the environment that has if it goes unchecked? Are you aware of where the vast majority of the funds that go to national parks & maintaining public wilderness areas? IT COMES FROM HUNTERS.
@rubyrootless7324
@rubyrootless7324 Месяц назад
​@@goddammitalanaalana, have you heard of this neat thing called a metaphor
@DragonRose610
@DragonRose610 2 месяца назад
Am I the only person who doesn’t want to live staying home all day everyday? Gen Z, whether woman or man always seem to say that all women would want to stay home if they could, but that sounds like a nightmare to me.
@abor1males
@abor1males 2 месяца назад
Sounds like a trap no social interaction with others only with your spouse and children if you have any.
@JennyferPepin
@JennyferPepin 2 месяца назад
I love my job and wouldn't quit it for staying home. I like to go to work, it fulfills my social needs while also allowing me to clock out at the end of the day. Go home and relax. It's my comfort space. Being stuck in a house all day everyday would make me depressed. And my home wouldn't be a comfort space, would feel more like a cage.
@abor1males
@abor1males 2 месяца назад
@@kattell5183 Male sure you have a back up account or income somewhere if things go left. ❤️❤️
@Mary-rp2re
@Mary-rp2re 2 месяца назад
Nah I like having a job, I’d want my husband to cover the big bills and keep me stress free and I’d do majority of the household stuff and obviously birth kids if we wanted them but I couldn’t marry a dude who doesn’t secure us financially cuz no way am I working while pregnant or sending my kids to daycare or marrying a man who I cant depend on kids or no kids, wether I work or not the bills will always be on him or I’ll stay single
@Viegas07
@Viegas07 2 месяца назад
I was all day with my baby, no help and barely could walk when I was outside, feeling dizzy and lost …it was 4 years, enough, my ex said to me “ You had a great life…how could you leave!” 🤡
@anastasia7
@anastasia7 2 месяца назад
10:00 men love free birds who give up a lot to be with them because it INCREASES THEIR SELF ESTEEM and EGO. "She's all that and she's giving everything up for me? I must be a big deal, she sees my potential, look at me, I'm all important and manly" 🙄
@noumiiidia
@noumiiidia 2 месяца назад
That's their mindset everyone in the globe , that's why girls and women should just never give up on their life's for someone
@thiefonthecross7552
@thiefonthecross7552 2 месяца назад
They inflate SO quickly.
@Crazyashley42
@Crazyashley42 2 месяца назад
And if the woman doesn't give up everything for him he gets all pissy. Look at Jonah Hill and Sarah Brady. She's a top tier surfer when they meet but he starts feeling "uncomfortable" with her doing the exact same job once they're together? Pitiful lack of esteem on his part.
@anastasia7
@anastasia7 2 месяца назад
@@Crazyashley42 good example! I don't know all the details but I've heard about that. He's ridiculous. As far as I remember, he was the one to slide into her DMs when he liked her PROFESSIONAL pictures (as a surfer in a bikini). After they split for whatever reason, she continues to do her job and he loses weight and suddenly is qualified to speak on what she is supposed to do? Or that he was not comfortable with her doing HER JOB at the beach and other men looking at her? And THAT made him a new redpill hero? Pffff 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️ It really proves what Manifestelle said: "Liberal men think women's bodies are public property, conservative men think women's bodies are private property".
@moonyaan
@moonyaan 2 месяца назад
exactly 😢
@user-rg7ds1bi3t
@user-rg7ds1bi3t 2 месяца назад
My husband left me while I was pregnant with our 4th baby. I kept having children with him and staying home as he climbed the career ladder. He left me with four kids, no career skills for a 21 year old. It was so hard and it is still a struggle. It was a mistake to trust him
@namkia205
@namkia205 2 месяца назад
Men would always leave you for a barely legal girl and treat her the same once she's 30 it's sad this happened to you and no other woman told you the truth about men
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
I am so sorry you were done so horribly wrong this way. You deserve so much help and support.
@cutebasooma
@cutebasooma 2 месяца назад
​@namkia205 believe it or not, this is a small percentage of men. Promoting this as the norm will make men feel okay about it and women depressed before even getting into a relationship.
@AsucaTheBLUBB
@AsucaTheBLUBB 2 месяца назад
I don't unterstand how the young women dating this type of man don't see the massive red flag.
@cutebasooma
@cutebasooma 2 месяца назад
@AsucaTheBLUBB it's either because they have daddy issues or because they want money.
@kindabent3275
@kindabent3275 2 месяца назад
This is why i feel like even if you want to be a trad-wife, its important to have a back up plan. I come from an arab background, and we have this "trad" style, ie men provide, women stay at home. BUT my grandparents made sure all their kids got education and went to university, and got at least a degree. They believe you shouldnt be dependent on just one person, the future is unpredictable and uncertain. Your husband could be ill, get in an accident, pass away, or just straight up leave you. Then what? Stay in education everyone!! or at least be able to work for yourself :)
@noumiiidia
@noumiiidia 2 месяца назад
Yes exactly, I have like the same background as you , but women and everyone generally need a backup plan, and never be dependent on one person , I heard stories of men who Abandoned their trad wifes to marry strong independent women (who they hate so much en the Internet...) because trad wifes just seemed boring for them , like imagine sacrificing you whole life and you know in our society even going out is by permission so that in the end you get... nothing
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
Thank you for sharing 🫶🏽🫶🏽
@kindabent3275
@kindabent3275 2 месяца назад
@@7rino896 whats wrong with the video? she said everything i did, but with given examples
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
Why even marry a man you don't trust? Marriage is sign of a trust and real connection. If I have a feeling that he may betray me in future, then why would I even bother being with him?
@margueritedepompadour7031
@margueritedepompadour7031 2 месяца назад
@@Someone-qi1rr You shouldn´t marry someone you don´t trust but you can obviously not 100% predict anyone´s future actions.
@MrsTruthTeller
@MrsTruthTeller 2 месяца назад
I used to feel bad that I was the girl who focused on my career and education over men and marriage. People really tried to make me feel bad about it. Today, at 35, I am BEYOND grateful for my choices. Because I'm an attorney, all of my friends who dropped out of college, got married, and had multiple kids are now calling me, crying about how to get a divorce. They are living in poverty, struggle with getting jobs, and have no way to start life over on their own. It is heartbreaking and I absolutely HATE how much society sells this false dream to young women. Literally ruining their lives for the benefit of self-serving men.
@EdgyIntellect
@EdgyIntellect Месяц назад
Girl I’m a 25F getting her masters degree in mental health counseling. I graduate in the fall. You have no idea how much I needed this!!!! Even at 25 I’ve never been in a relationship with anyone (I like girls) but I’m focused on getting myself together and stable. BUT even logically knowing that what I’m doing is for myself and my future I STILL feel like a loser and failure because I don’t have a house, relationship, etc like everyone else around me. I AM SO GLAD I READ YOUR COMMENT!!!!😭💜
@MrsTruthTeller
@MrsTruthTeller Месяц назад
@@EdgyIntellect Trust me, you are doing it the right way! Get your education and career in order before you add on any major liabilities to your life. Even buying a house right now is a huge liability that could set you back. Build your foundation and make sure it’s strong enough to withstand anything. Congratulations on your educational achievements! 🎉
@gustericaaa
@gustericaaa 2 месяца назад
My neighbours husband died in car crash leaving her with a 5yr old and 3 month old. Luckily we have a good community here so she wasn't left jobless and penniless.
@selrox879
@selrox879 2 месяца назад
@4ElementGirl
@4ElementGirl 2 месяца назад
Yeah that's the thing, even if your husband is perfect they can still pass away.
@spiritsafe-ko4ee
@spiritsafe-ko4ee 2 месяца назад
Abandon coitus, embrace community.
@nathang2465
@nathang2465 2 месяца назад
Life insurance and good financial planning could help a situation like this. If your husband isn’t high earning obviously being a SAH wife is not a good idea.
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
​​@@nathang2465 Not all widow relief is enough to pay the bills. Not all insurance end up paying you well. I lost my dad but my mom is a nurse. What she gets from his insurance isn't enough to cover everything. Her career is literally what keeps us from being homeless
@monicaa0508
@monicaa0508 2 месяца назад
I grew up Mormon and only speak of my own experience. The message of “your most important role will always be in the home”was DRILLED into my mind starting at age 8. EIGHT. When I was 22 and had my first big girl job, church members (men and women but mostly men) started asking me why I wasn’t married. When I turned 30 and bought my first home, members told me a house is not a home without a family. The conditioning starts so young and if you don’t conform, they remind you. Instead, I chose to leave the church. Choosing my peace over the pressure of the patriarchy that many religions push- especially to live under the obedience to a man, with little to no back up plan. My heart breaks for that creator and hope all who feel like she does find some peace soon. ❤
@GosuTenshi
@GosuTenshi Месяц назад
I also grew up Mormon. But I always hated that message and knew I would put a career first, even as a kid. Fortunately I did very well in school and had parents who were proud of that. Now I can say I am very glad I never listened to their constant lessons about getting married young to another church member and having kids as fast as possible as the ultimate goal. It would have killed me to live like a "good Mormon wife" and I would have hated it.
@rkae282
@rkae282 Месяц назад
I’ve had a different Mormon experience. I did marry young and we do have a few kids (my choice, I love children) but my husband also prioritised my education and dreams. With his support (and my own hard work, lol) I have multiple qualifications including a law degree and a PhD, and an academic career. I know lots of Mormon women who work and pursue careers. The Church doesn’t frown on it. My name is on the house deed and my husbands business as a part owner and no one has ever suggested it shouldn’t be. There are lots of ways to be LDS and lots of different LDS experiences. I feel for the woman in the video though, hers was clearly a very negative one.
@sleepyvessel1848
@sleepyvessel1848 23 дня назад
As a little girl who was raised Mormon, I would be pressuring by other members telling me that I should get married and have kids early. My mom told me to never listen. She always told me that I could have a family when I had a career and education. I’d tell other members and they’d give me this look and just say “yeahh, okay. Just remember what your sacred duty is.” They’d almost judge my mom for instilling this lesson in me. Only as I’ve gotten older have I realized WHY my mom went against the grain of her faith. She had been caught in the same trap that many trad wives found themselves in. My father was a bum who refused to work, and when he did he would do whatever he could to get fired. My mom raised 4 kids + a husband by learning new skills and starting her own business. Keep in mind she was a brown immigrant who had to fight for the respect of a white town in the 1970s. I’ve left the church a long time ago, my mother hasn’t though. She did divorce my dad, though. My stepdad is incredibly supportive and is currently helping her work off the debt my dad left her.
@pingu3984
@pingu3984 20 дней назад
Best decision I ever made was to leave the church. It is drenched with misogyny. Leaving saved my life. I wish more people spoke about this.
@shadowhunterartemis
@shadowhunterartemis 2 месяца назад
As someone who was once engaged at 19 and promptly replaced with another teenager when I hit 22, this.
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
This. Is. Vile. You are heard and listened to. Wow, I'm really sorry you were discarded. He did you THE Largest favor
@Taylor086
@Taylor086 2 месяца назад
I'm sorry this happened to you. But it's a blessing in disguise. Better than it's youe fiance who broke up with you after 3 years together. Than for your husband to leave you after 30 years and 3 kids, and leave you in debt, and give you diseases that he got from other women. You doged a bullet with that ex. You deserve much better than a man who can't commit to one woman
@irenes8689
@irenes8689 2 месяца назад
What! OMG I'm sorry to hear that you went through that. It's okay Karma will get them.
@danaso2567
@danaso2567 Месяц назад
22? That's...something else
@blessedwhitney
@blessedwhitney 2 месяца назад
I notice that when trads describe trad wife, they describe many things that the tradwife does, but rarely describe what the tradhusband is supposed to be doing. Providing? Hardly, as they aren't providing for retirement. Protecting? From what, the poverty that could come if tradhusband becomes disabled from a work injury? No, they aren't talking about disability insurance.
@carlycrays2831
@carlycrays2831 2 месяца назад
What's weird is that you actually do hear about this from, like, norma stay-at-home spouces. They do tend to talk about what the guy does and how the work is distributed. Not from the trad wives
@rosannarichardson7951
@rosannarichardson7951 2 месяца назад
The man’s life literally does not change with marriage. In fact it gets easier on the home front and he can focus more on work and excel ($) there vs if he was single. Add in he becomes a father ($$), lot of social perks. MEN WILL WORK IF MARRIED OR SINGLE. So when I hear men complain about being tired coming home from work and that we should expect nothing from him, like excuse me sir you’d have to do these household things if YOU WERE SINGLE. It’s like these men never left their moms and pretend to not know how to be independent. Either he’s a liar or he’s playing you, and I don’t want to be with either.
@cryaboutit7499
@cryaboutit7499 2 месяца назад
I never understood the “protect” thing 😂 women are mostly murdered by their husbands
@janicefinch3563
@janicefinch3563 2 месяца назад
@@cryaboutit7499 What a dumb argument. Children face the highest risk of homicide by parents, but that doesn't make most parents murderers or change the fact that parents are supposed to love and protect their kids.
@fatemad4012
@fatemad4012 2 месяца назад
​@@janicefinch3563husband is stranger not your blood children are protected because they are the blood line of family so husband and also wives are more dangerous than blood relative
@healingpoisonbreak9984
@healingpoisonbreak9984 2 месяца назад
My mom sacrificed so much for my father, she even worked two jobs, when he got sick and reconstructed our house. When they divorced, what did she get? NOTHING. Got nothing of all those years of care and loyalty and hard work and investment on the house. Was left without a house, and she is still renting to this day.Learned a hard lesson from that.
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
You are heard. I am so so so sorry for your wonderful mother. I will keep her story in mind. Is she doing well enough to be okay currently? I hope.
@rachelreii5952
@rachelreii5952 2 месяца назад
After nearly losing me (me passing potentially) he finally said he wanted marriage like nooo you should have known this at least two years ago. If I'm giving up all that. I gain nothing but him expecting me to work like a dog and then come home to raise my children. Without marriage so if he decides to go I'm fckd. Thankfully I didn't go for it.
@trevnti
@trevnti Месяц назад
How did she end up with nothing? Even with a prenup the law states one partner can’t leave the other destitute.
@star3catcherSEQUEL
@star3catcherSEQUEL 2 месяца назад
The rush to get married young "because women expire" is especially stupid because as you said, women age regardless, it's not like marriage is a magic spell that preserves your youth. If he would leave you without marriage, why wouldn't he leave you after marriage? It happens all the time.
@duckyh9712
@duckyh9712 2 месяца назад
This is deflection logic. There are dumb men but most know a women will get old and unappealing by 35. If you build your life with us and not wait in the finish line men will reward you with loyalty. If you see the divorce stats men are willing to make that compromise. If your already old a man by then would have put in the work and doesn’t want a woman he doesn’t know in her decline so he deserves younger.
@furballrage595
@furballrage595 2 месяца назад
If anything, marriage makes women age faster, because of the stress of being with men.
@duckyh9712
@duckyh9712 2 месяца назад
@@furballrage595 fake news married men and married women are the happiest possible people. Go actually look up real stats instead of fake men hate propaganda
@oddi-trea6099
@oddi-trea6099 2 месяца назад
​​@@duckyh9712These are the same men who try to bully female content creators vaguely defending women by telling them that no one will want them by the time they're 35, only for the creator to say she's actually older. Many aren't actually able to tell what a 35-year-old (still a relatively young person) looks like, much less judge that they're not as appealing, and it's always delicious when it happens.
@charis6311
@charis6311 Месяц назад
@@duckyh9712 OMG I can only hope you are being ironic.
@sarahharvey7844
@sarahharvey7844 2 месяца назад
i only know one couple that has a real traditional marriage and that is my Aunt and Uncle who are in their 70's. They have 7 children, she stayed home, he was a plumber and supported the whole family and she stayed home. She has never pumped her own gas nor taken the garbage out, or done any manual work whatsoever. My uncle is a good man that only had eyes for his wife. NOw they travel to ARizona and Hawaii multiple times a year and he has set her up to be financially secure if he were to die before her. They are very reliant on each other. Since that is the only real traditional marriage I've seen the statistics aren't good that any one else can have one.
@ihanakaunotar2741
@ihanakaunotar2741 2 месяца назад
Yeah, it takes both to actually want the best to each other instead of controlling which often comes from insecurity.
@HolisticLady-kh2im
@HolisticLady-kh2im 2 месяца назад
I've personally never known a real traditional marriage that has worked.
@Shaphat
@Shaphat 2 месяца назад
Imo , it's different being an average house wife than being the type of tradwife those TikTok women are promoting. A house wife still manages her home and has her own ideas on how to handle the house hold, a trad wife influenced by TikTok can only be submissive and be happy with what the husband is willing to give even if it's not what she actually needs. Because they are expected to be stepford wives and not actual women. So no, I don't think that example counts, even the tik tok influencers are not examples of that lifestyle working cuz they are still young and pretty (plus making money off from TikTok). So anyway, traditional marriage role is different from the tradwife trend. That's my opinion tho
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
She's lucky he is still alive. It would be a different story if he wasn't.
@sarahharvey7844
@sarahharvey7844 2 месяца назад
@@bmona7550 actually I think she would live the rest of her days happy if he were to pass… now if she does before him that would be a different story. He doesn’t cook for himself so he’s probably starve 🤪
@snehasaha7259
@snehasaha7259 2 месяца назад
Trad-wife life is one hell of a risky life. As women we should never put yourselves in such vulnerable places ever.
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
It's not if you know how to choose. Nothing bad about wanting a provider man.
@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534
@datingandlifeadvicechannel7534 2 месяца назад
Agreed
@BenziitOfemme
@BenziitOfemme 2 месяца назад
NEVER
@leveticus1461
@leveticus1461 2 месяца назад
​@@Someone-qi1rr 🦍🌬
@emzuli7432
@emzuli7432 2 месяца назад
😂​@@Someone-qi1rr
@DyaOrWhateva
@DyaOrWhateva 2 месяца назад
My dad chased my mom all her teenagehood because she was smart and high achieving. She even ended up providing for us for a few years before while pursuing a lot of small degrees to get in better and better positions (with three kids). But the moment he got on his feet, he caged her. Gaslight her into thinking that she wanted to rest and be fully dependent on him. Then he just turned into one of the worst people all around and she can’t leave him anymore because she is fully financially dependent on him. :/ weirdest part is that he likes bringing up how many jobs she’s had and how good she was at all of them. This is not a narrative. That’s a pattern. Every single boy that married in my family is like that. Add to that the culture of polygamy and sister-wives. This is all I’ve ever seen and I’m running so fucking far away from that. No.
@Nesquik908
@Nesquik908 2 месяца назад
Yes run for your life 👌
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
Holy Terrifying! Is your family Mormon?? I'm guessing this based off the polygamy and sister wives part?
@ah5721
@ah5721 2 месяца назад
the offshoots do the sister wife thing , that's the AUB , the Order and the FLDS . Mainstream Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints doesn't practice living polygamy .@@EasyPeasyVegan
@Maya_hee
@Maya_hee 2 месяца назад
@@EasyPeasyVegan Could be Muslim too. We also have a culture of treating women like shit and disposable
@EasyPeasyVegan
@EasyPeasyVegan 2 месяца назад
@@Maya_hee Wow, sickening. We have got to gather together and share our information to keep one another safe via these platforms.
@blessedwhitney
@blessedwhitney 2 месяца назад
A man who loves you (love being "wanting the best for another person") will be happy for you to finish college, knowing that one day he may be gone. Sometimes people die. Sometimes people are injured and become paralyzed. If he's claiming to provide and "protect", he needs to protect you from difficult hardships like that.
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
That's why he's financially stable and gives you an allowance. With that, you are safe
@Ineverusemychannel
@Ineverusemychannel 2 месяца назад
⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠@@Someone-qi1rrThat allowance ends when his relationship to you does, and sometimes even before then. His financial stability also relies in part on external factors that he does not control. Lunch money and a pat on the head is not protection and certainly not a back up plan.
@kanikakumari7219
@kanikakumari7219 2 месяца назад
​@@Someone-qi1rrwhy are you so against women working and having their own money?
@daRich_X
@daRich_X 2 месяца назад
@@Someone-qi1rr That allowance equates to at least a full-time wage I assume?
@arodemidive6195
@arodemidive6195 2 месяца назад
Right! A man who loves you is so proud to tell others about your degree, your small business, your promotion at work, your awesome accomplishments. A man who wants to take that away from you and have you solely depend on them is iffy. And if he wants to have you depend on him without putting any money aside for your provision, he's an absolute "no".
@SheDetective
@SheDetective 2 месяца назад
My ex turned very abusive, after we split I followed my dreams and make 80k+ a year, and met a new man who loves and supports me mentally. He also has a good career and already owns property, we plan to start a family in the next year or two. We will both contribute to our family, we both enjoy having a career!
@ifinditinteresting.8709
@ifinditinteresting.8709 2 месяца назад
Oh wow. So happy for you
@irenes8689
@irenes8689 2 месяца назад
Good for you! 😊
@sofiabravo1994
@sofiabravo1994 Месяц назад
your babies are going to be first its also biological, men dont carry humans for 9 months and nurse which adds more work as a mom....you may be able to do it but your children will lack, its vital the first 3 years.
@MrsTruthTeller
@MrsTruthTeller 2 месяца назад
OMG I try to tell women this ALL the time. If a man thinks older women are expired goods, why would you marry him and risk him leaving you for younger women when you get older? If a man doesn't value older women then OBVIOUSLY he won't value you when you get older. Its common sense!
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
Absolutely. The answer to "older women are expired damaged goods" is "I WILL BE AN OLDER WOMAN SOMEDAY." And then walking out the door to go find a real man.
@D64nz
@D64nz 20 дней назад
When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
@karenabrams8986
@karenabrams8986 2 месяца назад
“A man is not a plan” is pure gold.
@coolbreeze5683
@coolbreeze5683 2 месяца назад
As a woman in her late 40s, I'm so happy that this message is becoming more mainstream. If you're a woman wanting to do what's best for herself, you'd get so many people calling you selfish, narcissistic, etc. Don't listen to those people. They're just angry and jealous of you because you're doing what they wish they could do. If a guy says he will leave if you don't want to do what he want, let him walk. These are the same guys who will leave you eventually anyway. Always live for yourself, your peace, your adventure and your knowledge because that is the right life for you.
@ggbellz
@ggbellz 2 месяца назад
💜
@andrealeon3979
@andrealeon3979 18 дней назад
Yesssssssss ❤🎉
@mariapaz6379
@mariapaz6379 2 месяца назад
if anyone who says "you will expire" run! people dont expire that person probably doesnt consider you a person, they consider you a resource. And they will do what they have to do to consume you.
@duckyh9712
@duckyh9712 2 месяца назад
Hate to break it to you but most men think like that. Most won’t say it out loud thiugh
@LuxNovuz
@LuxNovuz 2 месяца назад
@@duckyh9712with this mindset are you still confused as to why women don’t want to be in relationships anymore?
@duckyh9712
@duckyh9712 2 месяца назад
@@LuxNovuz. If you actually looks at the stats. Women are in more relationships than men by a lot. Welcome to reality.girls have it easy to get a man while young and men get it easier when older. Blame god
@idontcare1102
@idontcare1102 2 месяца назад
@@duckyh9712 Well duh! Their actions speak louder than words. It has been observed and recorded. 🙄
@just1desi
@just1desi 2 месяца назад
Men view women as appliances as another Creator says when the Wife Appliance is broken they get a replacement
@donotme8061
@donotme8061 2 месяца назад
I haven’t finished the video but I was listening to a podcast yesterday where a man married his housekeeper because he was stingy and didn’t want to pay her anymore. And the podcasters made a joke (I could tell they were being sarcastic) but even the male podcasters saying “oh yeah - I married my wife for free labor” hit really hard. And I am single and unmarried.
@vikki8699
@vikki8699 2 месяца назад
This is why I refuse to clean up after men or do any of their laundry. They make the mess, they can clean it up. I just do my own. The moment a man expect free labour and hit him with an invoice for the chore he wants me to do or him. They hate it and I remind them NOTHING IN LIFE IS FREE!
@mae7532
@mae7532 2 месяца назад
They really stay telling on themselves
@JennyferPepin
@JennyferPepin 2 месяца назад
The fact there are people like that who would use others for their benefit is absolutely sickening. And they are calling women selfish for choosing to stay single.
@faree8532
@faree8532 2 месяца назад
I met a lady once who told me her husband was getting married to their housemaid! It was wild! The lady gave up work for a few years to take care of her kids. Because her husband wasn't providing enough, she decided to go back to work when the youngest was in preschool. This set her some years behind her peers, but work is work. Now because work was tasking, and she needed someone to care for the kids, she got a live in maid (it's very common in my country, Nigeria). She's starting to do well at work, then boom! Husband says he is taking a second wife. (Yes, polygamy is also a thing).She is shocked, and tries to fight it, till she discovers who her husband is getting married to - her housemaid! There's no disrespect worse than this. At this point, she would have rather he married another woman, but to have him marry her housemaid, and insist the maid will live in the same house with them?! Gosh! I gave my own piece of advice, leave with your kids. I really hope she was able to do that. Anybody who understands the dynamics knows that that was a harrowing experience for her.
@LisaSoulLevelHealing
@LisaSoulLevelHealing 2 месяца назад
​@faree8532 why would you take the kids? This is weird. Be the weekend parent - you can get a job easier, back on your feet, go to school easier. Also, he would also appreciate your value. As long as he isn't abusive or criminal. Let him have those kids.
@tambariw
@tambariw 2 месяца назад
Another piece of advice I'd give trad wives/SAHMs whose husbands are filing for divorce...1) Fight for alimony AND child support 2) If the man isn't violent, go for 50/50 physical custody. Make that man be responsible for his children. Plus you'll have time to get your life back together while the kids are with him.
@LeoDBW
@LeoDBW 2 месяца назад
I've personally witnessed many fathers who refused to pay child support, and still wanted to see their kids occasionally or on weekends. Yeah, you're right John, you leave your working ex wife alone with two young kids 80% of the time but GOD FORBID she ask for child support, you're already doing SO MUCH taking them on weekends she should be grateful! /s 🙄
@tambariw
@tambariw 2 месяца назад
@@LeoDBW yeah, I know of some fathers like that. They chose to not physically be in their children's lives AND then will not pay child support. It's despicable. But there are ways around it. Going to court and having a good lawyer is helpful. You can actually have the child support automatically taken out from paychecks so that they actually cannot withhold. In some states, if a father is behind in child support or doesn't fulfill his physical custody, he can actually get fined and/or arrested.
@cryaboutit7499
@cryaboutit7499 2 месяца назад
@@LeoDBW my sisters baby daddy doesn’t pay child support and he has 8 others kids with many other women. He literally comes to take out my sister’s kids once every month, it feels like. Idk why women put with with that, that’s not being a father 💀 especially with men who have many baby mamas, he doesn’t respect women.
@ah5721
@ah5721 2 месяца назад
some states steal child support. I just read an article on it 😮‍💨@@tambariw
@EmyEgy31
@EmyEgy31 2 месяца назад
this is so true, in my country Egypt many women end in the streets homeless after husband kick her out, they suffer so much. and others forced to stay in abusive marriage for the kids. my friend mother was doctor who left her job to be Trad wife, he left 16 years later for his widow coworker. she tried to work again, but its not the same after wasting many years not working.
@ragsrare3771
@ragsrare3771 2 месяца назад
Good to see other women from Arabia here. Our countries simps for men even if they were wrong
@EmyEgy31
@EmyEgy31 2 месяца назад
@@ragsrare3771I saw one in my country simp for men online, she got married, he abused her, stole her money and now she is divorce, they will learn to wake up one way or another. many of us brainwashed from young age to simp by society, but wake up by reality.
@ah5721
@ah5721 2 месяца назад
I wasted 8 years of my life not going to school and working to raise my family of two . I eventually went back to school and can't find work now my kids are in school and im only 34 . Luckily my husband is a provider and a good caring man who lets me manage the money .. but if he were to become disabled or dead we would be homeless.
@gateway2hell
@gateway2hell 2 месяца назад
@@ragsrare3771And it’s very infuriating! You bet i’m out there giving them shit on their little sexist facebook posts. you guys should do the same
@bmona7550
@bmona7550 2 месяца назад
​@@ah5721 In suggest you look into nursing or any healthcare careers.
@Veronica24296
@Veronica24296 2 месяца назад
Take out “love” which is a fleeting *feeling* that can change in a heartbeat and a feeling that men in particular aren’t exactly known to be swayed by- and make this partnership make financial or logical sense. You cannot. Women who fall for the trad wife scam are actually, unfortunately, delulu. With peace and love, not trying to blame the victim. Besties- wake up!!!
@mae7532
@mae7532 2 месяца назад
💯
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
It's not a scam as long as the men they marry are good ones. Feminism is literally made up of men so they can use women even more. Sorry if I want to completely trust my husband and be dependent on him even tho I am the one who's gonna give birth multiple times.
@intentionalparenting2605
@intentionalparenting2605 2 месяца назад
Depending on your situation financially it does make sense. I have 6 children and homeschool them. Everyone perspective is different. I’d do anything to be the one caring for my children than to work all day, send them to school and barely raising them. I’ve lived both lives. If you can work from home and still take care of your family while being at at home mom/wife. It’s best! But the truth of the matter is..:security is an illusion no matter how you try to “make it make sense “
@briskettacos
@briskettacos 2 месяца назад
They're delulu, but not in the good way 😅
@Veronica24296
@Veronica24296 2 месяца назад
@@intentionalparenting2605 Choosing to prioritize family over financial security and independence is a personal decision, but relying solely on a spouse for financial support can be risky. It's important to have some level of independence and financial security in case things change, like a divorce or other unforeseen circumstances. So, while being a stay-at-home parent can be valuable, having skills or a backup plan is wise for everyone's peace of mind.
@Theloveinabubble
@Theloveinabubble 2 месяца назад
My grandma lived the tradwife dream until my grandpa left her with the kids (and he was a violent alcoholic of course). She raised her 5 kids working on kitchens. She always told me to never depend financially on a man, no matter what I do, always have money for your survival
@user-sl1ec2mf6r
@user-sl1ec2mf6r 2 месяца назад
Many women would put it on fate.At least she warned.
@maymay.freitas
@maymay.freitas 2 месяца назад
THE GOOD MAN AREN'T ONLINE❤❤❤ you nailed it
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
I mean when you think about it 🥰🫶🏽
@clauaome25
@clauaome25 2 месяца назад
@@therealmanifestelle so true
@etcwhatever
@etcwhatever 2 месяца назад
I deleted everything except instagram (i only post landscape pics and animals) and youtube (lots of useful advice and dyi tutorials).
@etcwhatever
@etcwhatever 2 месяца назад
@@Someone-qi1rr this channel isnt about you. It isnt about any man.
@stephanieg8545
@stephanieg8545 2 месяца назад
But where do you find them?😩
@afrinaaest
@afrinaaest 2 месяца назад
Give your husband 40% of your love save 60% for yourself. Otherwise, you'll feel drained
@ifinditinteresting.8709
@ifinditinteresting.8709 2 месяца назад
THIS!!! I NEED TO WRITE THIS DOWN SOMEWHERE
@mariedeloine7734
@mariedeloine7734 2 месяца назад
yes, i was in a relationship with a man and I gave him all my love. He was addict. He cheated on me and treat me like sheet because he knew I was in love with him. He was violent and I was scared of him.
@agathag8985
@agathag8985 2 месяца назад
👏👏👏👏
@hayleyshearer9631
@hayleyshearer9631 2 месяца назад
30% of your love, 70% for yourself
@thatgoodthing
@thatgoodthing 2 месяца назад
10% to him, 90% for me
@SS-cu8se
@SS-cu8se 2 месяца назад
As someone who was raised by a single mom, I will always have my own money. Nobody cares about you when you got kids. They are your responsibility, so make sure you are being RESPONSIBLE for them by ensuring your finances are in order, independent of whether you have a man or not.
@actually_curious4773
@actually_curious4773 2 месяца назад
so true
@Selonie
@Selonie 2 месяца назад
Ever seen or heard of women who were married in the 1950s, 60s, 70s, saying that being a traditional wife or being a stahm made them happy? My grandmother was a traditional wife with no income, whenever I asked her about how it feels to be like that, she always said that her whole life was very controlled and there was a huge lack of freedom. Us spoiled girlies don't deserve to live a life like that. Always put your education first and be financially self reliant or at least financially stable. The sad reality is a man can easily replace a traditional wife, like all she does is cooking and cleaning so yeah.
@ah5721
@ah5721 2 месяца назад
my mom was a a 90s wife. it was still the same. She was financially and verbally abused , baby trapped with 5 kids. she didn't know how to make enough money to take care of all of us without help so she stayed. she now is on disability at the young age of 54 becasue of the lack of medical care and lives in a moldy apartment because she won't move because its to exspensive to try and find another place that will take SS money .
@Selonie
@Selonie 2 месяца назад
@@ah5721 omg poor women. at least our generation women should learn from their mistakes and not fall into traps like these.
@mamaseesa3122
@mamaseesa3122 Месяц назад
My mom was born in the 40s. Her first husband was a jerk, somewhat controlling, and died when their boys were 2 and 4. She supported them as a single mom for 13 years before she met my dad. They married in the mid 80s. They had ups and downs but were very happy for 38 years. She passed from brain cancer on their anniversary. Her first husband was that old stereotype of the man controlling his wife, she didn't have a job, a car, even a driver's license. She was lucky, he was a police officer and she ended up with widow's benefits to help support her sons. But in the end when she met my dad she had a job, a car, a house, etc. And during their marriage he let her have whatever she wanted. He was raised in the same environment that produced her first husband, but he came out different. Are we products of our society? Sure. But we are also products of our parents. Raise your kids right and maybe that will fix some of society's problems.
@rosannarichardson7951
@rosannarichardson7951 2 месяца назад
The man’s life literally does not change with marriage. In fact it gets easier on the home front and he can focus more on work and excel ($) there vs if he was single. Add in he becomes a father ($$), lot of social perks. MEN WILL WORK IF MARRIED OR SINGLE. So when I hear men complain about being tired coming home from work and that we should expect nothing from him, like excuse me sir you’d have to do these household things if YOU WERE SINGLE. Either way they are working and bringing in money. However they want endless thanks for it when they get a wife, and use it as a crutch or worse as an excuse in mistreatment? It’s like these men never left their moms and pretend to not know how to be independent. Either he’s a liar, an incompetent dumb person, or he’s playing you, and I don’t want to be with any version of that.
@ggbellz
@ggbellz 2 месяца назад
🎯💯👏🏼
@lostintranslation57
@lostintranslation57 2 месяца назад
There are lots of videos of child free women in their 60s, 70’s and 80’s that have no regrets and are very happy and proud of their choices. Yet every older trad wife says don’t do it.
@Catn255
@Catn255 2 месяца назад
Many happily divorced women too!
@danaso2567
@danaso2567 Месяц назад
This is anecdotal, but I have noticed that single older women who are financially ok are happier than older women in marriages. Not even in bad marriages, they can be married with decent men, but as most men live less their health declines faster than women's in the final years and they end up taking care of them.
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@danaso2567 Part of why I'm in a relationship with a mature younger man. He's nicer than most men my age, more respectful, doesn't have financial burdens or children from past relationships to drag us both down... sure, he had less experience, but that just means less bad habits to unlearn both in bed and in the relationship. Younger men, shy men, sensitive men who aren't afraid to cry--all underrated. When a man is prepared to take care of you when you're old, and smiles tenderly just thinking about it, or gets choked up thinking about how you'll probably die first, you found a keeper.
@2livenoob
@2livenoob Месяц назад
@@Catn255 So you are looking at one subset of happy women and saying it is wrong for anyone to look at another subset of happy women?
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot Месяц назад
lol I don’t want a husband at this point, I just want children 💀 I feel like I have nothing to live for unless I have a kid
@luw5244
@luw5244 2 месяца назад
My mum was a ‘trad wife’ for 8 years. It left her broke, depressed and down bad until she had had enough and got a job.
@_kaleido
@_kaleido 2 месяца назад
If a man ever approaches you wanting you to be a tradwife, tell him you expect him to be a tradhusband i.e. put aside a portion of his paycheck for you so you can go shopping... if he reacts badly to that he didn't want a tradlife in the first place I think.
@MichelleCacais
@MichelleCacais 2 месяца назад
Behind every unsuccessful woman, there is a man
@nairamatsolo8590
@nairamatsolo8590 2 месяца назад
Same goes for man
@MegaMarVerde
@MegaMarVerde 2 месяца назад
@@nairamatsolo8590 nah
@nairamatsolo8590
@nairamatsolo8590 2 месяца назад
@@MegaMarVerde it is true,not always is a man behind a woman success and not always there is a woman begind a mans sucess
@MichelleCacais
@MichelleCacais 2 месяца назад
@@nairamatsolo8590 usually, it's the woman who gives up on her career to take care of the children and support her husband. We don't see a lot of examples when the man is the one who gives up his career for a woman
@bishop51807
@bishop51807 2 месяца назад
LOL no take some responsibility and give yourself some power.
@blunttalkingoffspring
@blunttalkingoffspring 2 месяца назад
Before you get married.. get a prenuptial agreement..I got a divorce..I lost my cars..all my things..my health insurance..he just used me..
@Usagi393
@Usagi393 Месяц назад
For those interested in being a trad wife based solely on social media: 1.) These women are not trad wives. They have a job as influencers. They make their own money 2.) Ask yourself why you never see middle age women selling this lifestyle
@the_agate_gate3782
@the_agate_gate3782 2 месяца назад
Yes. Marriage for women is indentured servitude. I realized that a long time ago. And it’s actually funny that a lot of people just want to stay home, considering that the effect of doing so was clearly shown by the pandemic- Isolation, listlessness, anxiety, depression. As much as not having to work is nice, my mental health has always been at its worst when I had no job.
@Grendygirl
@Grendygirl 2 месяца назад
My brain works better when I have something to look forward to or a pending engagement
@trevnti
@trevnti Месяц назад
I’m a stay at home mom. My life is work. No days off. I don’t think ppl realize that.
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot Месяц назад
@@trevntiLITERALLY!!! I want to be a stay at home mom so bad. I don’t trust anyone with my children
@kp361
@kp361 2 месяца назад
"It's always people born at the wall threatening women that we're going to hit the wall." - True words right here!
@noona514
@noona514 2 месяца назад
Certain men in this online space are really angry that women want equality in relationships; women are putting their careers first and that makes them not so vulnerable in a relationship. I'm tired of them shaming or trying to scare women to settle down before 25. It's not about who gets married and has kids first. It's about who does it right!
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot
@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot Месяц назад
I don’t want equality, I want to be a stay at home mom like I was made to be😔
@calidafeuersichel1515
@calidafeuersichel1515 29 дней назад
@@teamchrisisrllyrllyhot Good for you, if that's what you love. Still you need to make plans for the future. You can have the best hubby and awesome kids, when he gets in an acident you need to be the strong one for your family. You can still live traditionally and have a backup plan :) Like my grandma had emergency saveings and a lot of small gold coins and jewlery. In case she fell on hard times, she had those things to sell and get food for her family. With my mom and dad, she was looking for us kids, and he tended to the farm. But mum would get paid by the hour, when she helped on the farm plus got money to buy food for the family. On the other hand, we life in a world, where it's ok to not be, what we are "meant" to be ^^ you don't have to get married and have kids in order to help society.
@wellknown1204
@wellknown1204 2 месяца назад
Mom always said, got your own degree and work. Shits even my dad spent so much money to pay my tuitions just to end up a stay home wife who works 24/7 for a room and board😂. Girly, I can work as apartment maintainnce person😂, so i got room and board and get paid too
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
EXACTLY
@amberarzuaga6426
@amberarzuaga6426 2 месяца назад
Even as a small child I never saw being a trad wife as ideal. As a kid whenever I asked for something and my parents said no or " We don't have the money for that." My thought process was "I can't wait to get older so I can have a job and get it myself." Ever since then, I never want to go back to being in that childlike state of having to ask for anything I want or need.
@antoinettemralasi1425
@antoinettemralasi1425 2 месяца назад
After Elle said "Every woman needs FUN money and RUN money" I have been saying it to myself and other women over and over❤ BurbNBougie also said that every woman needs a "Go Bag" 🏃‍♀️
@4ElementGirl
@4ElementGirl 2 месяца назад
Yup, never put all your eggs in 1 basket. Have backup banks, backup funds, all of that. @donk8105
@nikkih4692
@nikkih4692 2 месяца назад
"A man is not a plan"
@Someone-qi1rr
@Someone-qi1rr 2 месяца назад
It is
@halimahabubakar-sidiq142
@halimahabubakar-sidiq142 2 месяца назад
​@@Someone-qi1rr No it's not
@ageofaquarius8309
@ageofaquarius8309 2 месяца назад
It's your demise
@furballrage595
@furballrage595 2 месяца назад
​@@Someone-qi1rrYou ain't a plan, bro.
@chelseajknapp
@chelseajknapp 2 месяца назад
Another thought on why men like to "cage free birds", men love through suffering and sacrifice. When a man makes YOU suffer and sacrifice THEN he feels you actually love him, and when he thinks that then he thinks he has control over you. What is love?
@namkia205
@namkia205 2 месяца назад
Love is something men don't know.
@TechnoScorpion2137
@TechnoScorpion2137 2 месяца назад
Baby don't hurt me No more
@annalieff-saxby568
@annalieff-saxby568 2 месяца назад
If your idea of love is suffering and sacrifice, you need a new dictionary.
@user-qx1om2wj1h
@user-qx1om2wj1h Месяц назад
The type men in these situations are usually narcissists who pray on others weaknesses.
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@TechnoScorpion2137 You said what I was thinking.
@noumiiidia
@noumiiidia 2 месяца назад
Well , if women in the west who are trad wifes ends up like this , i will sure go finish my homeworks 😅😂😂 (3rd worlg girl here 😅)
@alwaysyouramanda
@alwaysyouramanda 2 месяца назад
🥹❤️ never give up on yourself or your dreams-! Whatever they may be!
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
Get that bag bestie 🫶🏽
@schuylergeery-zink1923
@schuylergeery-zink1923 2 месяца назад
Invest in your education 💖 also if you WANT kids as Elle has covered the woman’s education is correlated with her children’s education and success NOT the man. And marry for lifestyle and values, if you want marriage. I’m a lawyer and don’t even regret the student loans it took for my skill set, education, and network.
@glassycreek1991
@glassycreek1991 2 месяца назад
Yes please focus on yourself no matter how strong the USD is in your country's economy. Because even if you succeed in getting the green card and immigrate to a first world country, you would have to deal with the cost of living at first world standards. In the USA the cost of raising a family is extremely expensive and our men are not as understanding of economic responsibilities a family demands. American women understand this and this is why these Pbros complain about us being too picky, too burnt out and too masculine.
@mialeroux2943
@mialeroux2943 2 месяца назад
Do it! Also from a 3rd world country but admittedly I am privileged. Still, don't give away your autonomy and education is a BIG one x
@SoVidushi
@SoVidushi 2 месяца назад
I found myself romanticising this lifestyle when I was depressed, I liked the idea of taking care of people and looking pretty and having all my decisions taken for me. I still struggle with being passionate and ambitious but I know I want to do more with my life, reach my full potential and give back to my community.
@ia7072
@ia7072 2 месяца назад
Don't worry girl, I was like that, but in my house my step dad harassing me, so it boosted me to work and leave the house, when I got my driver's license and my beloved work I felt so strong that I became ambitious because I knew my potential and what I was capable of !
@SoVidushi
@SoVidushi 2 месяца назад
@@ia7072 happy for you girl, stay awesome
@SoVidushi
@SoVidushi 2 месяца назад
@@haventchangedmypfpsince2009 I'm sorry about that, take care. Rooting for you to find the right person for you and have a nice life :)
@optimalscore
@optimalscore 16 дней назад
Believe me I was in that depressive state when I was younger, and made the stupid decision to marry & have kids. It's just a phase, your neediness is a way of telling yourself that there's more for you to accomplish in this life, but it's not just being a trad wife & definitely not what society sees as normal place for a woman. I had such big dreams & high hopes for myself, now looking back I know I would've been unstoppable! But alas, here I am 17yrs later with 3kids still looking back at what could've been. I'm grateful for my kids, that is definitely something I don't regret, but the marriage part was not necessary. Oh I do have my Bachelors degree & I work full time, so I'm holding on to my autonomy that way. Goodluck sis!
@julrin7122
@julrin7122 2 месяца назад
As a married woman with kids, I can genuinely say this shit is not for everyone and male partners are intrinsically disappointing. Whatever decisions you make, make sure they are your own. Marry someone who at the very least makes your life easier.
@kristens8718
@kristens8718 2 месяца назад
My mom always told me to never depend on a man and I never will. I also learned from observing her 2 marriages to never marry a lazy man that doesn't cook or clean so you're stuck doing 95% of the housework while also working full time.
@haileeyyy-hm3sr
@haileeyyy-hm3sr 2 месяца назад
My aunt had 3 kids from her first husband, who was a criminal. Then she got into a relationship with another guy. He was abusive. She was a stay at home mom, who didn't speak english and never completed high school. she's an immigrant from Mexico, so she literally had no idea what to do. My family ended up helping her but her situation reminds me to never rely on a man to live. She got a job & lives in a duplex now, but to this day she relies heavily on her 19 year old son to help her navigate through life.
@garfieldroscharch
@garfieldroscharch 2 месяца назад
My grandmother was a traditional woman, she stayed at home taking care of her children and guess what my grandfather did? He beat her and all her children, he arrived drunk and never gave them money. Poverty teaches you the hardest lessons.
@AalayahTamera
@AalayahTamera 2 месяца назад
I am an introvert, so my job helps me to open up and socialize with strangers. I love coming home to my little cocoon, but if I was home 24/7 it would start feeling like 2020 again…”he that shall not be named”👀🤣
@grant0012
@grant0012 2 месяца назад
Sounds like a cute puppy 😭
@AalayahTamera
@AalayahTamera 2 месяца назад
@@grant0012 thanks?
@grant0012
@grant0012 2 месяца назад
@@AalayahTamera Well I meant the way you are describing him sounds that way 😊 Sorry if it came out rude
@MayaMaya-tj7kw
@MayaMaya-tj7kw 2 месяца назад
Staying home and cleaning sounds like something I would do if the weather outside was too bad not a lifestyle.
@obscuraxxxx
@obscuraxxxx 2 месяца назад
My mother was a traditional wife, and she divorced my dad after he gambled away our money, our home, put us in dangerous situations with dangerous people, and was abusive to my mother. It was rough, it's still rough. As fluffy as these lives look, I learned to not put my livelihood in the hands of others. Too many men show their true colours.
@hellokaumea8315
@hellokaumea8315 2 месяца назад
Women in the USA are taking big decision at such a young age from an European point of vue, how are you married, sahm with multiple kids before even reach the age of 25?? Sounds so crazy to me
@glassycreek1991
@glassycreek1991 2 месяца назад
This why there's American men traveling looking for a fresh wife while complaining that American women are burnt out.
@sundown6748
@sundown6748 2 месяца назад
This is me but I’m happy that I was a young married mother because I get to have my children in my life longer and I have great relationships with them. I will start a bad boss career in a few years when they’re all in college.
@suzy1750
@suzy1750 2 месяца назад
It's not 'women in the USA' but SOME women in the USA, who usually come from very conservative, religious backgrounds. People in other parts of the world don't comprehend the size and diversity of the United States - it's huge, not just a country but a continent containing vastly different cultures. In much of the USA, particularly among the middle classes (and above) though, girls are expected to go to college and get a degree before working and then marrying/having kids. Getting married and having kids at 18/19/20 is considered very strange to those raised outside those very conservative areas..
@Bardes82
@Bardes82 Месяц назад
When that's the mindset that you're raised to believe is right, of course you're going to think that's how it should be.
@driley5004
@driley5004 Месяц назад
Not me! My mom has 3 girls. I'm the only one married, none of us have kids. I just got married at 38. I never let anyone tell me I have to conform.
@flyandshy00
@flyandshy00 2 месяца назад
To me trad wife should get allowence from a man, the amount she used to make at her job. If she made 3K, he should give her that every month. If not then you're a free scort, maid, nanny, And he WILL LEAVE YOU anyway, because men love thril of the chase a new attractiveness object, etc.
@wyleecoyotee4252
@wyleecoyotee4252 2 месяца назад
Compensate her for lost wages.
@pauka9470
@pauka9470 2 месяца назад
Dont call it allowance, it gives power trip vibes, it is a part of his paycheck
@user-ie7vo1hj3j
@user-ie7vo1hj3j 2 месяца назад
The real "traditional" wives were the ones who gave their husbands an allowance. Bc traditionally women (in a healthy and well-working marriage obv - the ones that being used as an example, an ideal, something we should stive for) were the ones to control finances of the household, making sure the house in not only warm and clean but also doesn't lacks anything needed. Men earned money, gave them to their wives and recieved allowance - he gets to treat himself within a reason and she doesn't have to starve herself and her kids bc her man had too many glasses and gambled a year worth of money 😅
@LuxNovuz
@LuxNovuz 2 месяца назад
@@user-ie7vo1hj3jyou’re 100 percent correct. Since the Tudor times women have been the main bookkeepers of money. They’re the ones who kept it set up for the men to use for business, the ones who stated where that money was going to go. When why where who when. It all went through the woman of the house first.
@HolisticManifesting
@HolisticManifesting 2 месяца назад
So grateful i hightailed it out of my ridiculous marriage. My daughters were 1 and 3 and now 15 and 17. I've not struggled like this because i saw early on that it was a sham. I have a phd now and am very successful and he barely keeps a job. Our oldest daughter is currently on a school trip in Spain, something that would have never happened with him trying to constantly conquer and best me. Dont fall for it ladies. ❤
@catarinasousa1815
@catarinasousa1815 2 месяца назад
As an European, I can't help but wonder.. where is the state? How aren't these women with kids provided the proper help to take care of them? Also the men should be forced to pay child support if they have money
@isabellat.7011
@isabellat.7011 2 месяца назад
yes and also where are their families? here in Europe, mom and dad would never leave you and your children homeless and penniless…
@tjones3393
@tjones3393 2 месяца назад
All guys really have to do is either work jobs that pay cash or leave the state or live on an Indian reservation. They have a few options which they don't want y'all to know about but I've seen it sooo many times.
@idontcare1102
@idontcare1102 2 месяца назад
that's blasphemy you're speaking right now because in the US that's communism and that's bad according to the US.
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@idontcare1102 Yeah, ugh. This is why I was so happy to move to Europe from the US. The same sane social and labor protections we used to have are now "communism."
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@isabellat.7011 People in the US are being drained of generational wealth by predatory laws. Like if you accidentally overspend by a tiny amount--gasoline, a gallon of milk, a coffee and bagel--you can be fined hundreds and hundreds of dollars by the bank even if you deposit a paycheck that same day. Happened to me personally. Then there's Medicare, which is constantly under attack while medical charges are absolutely absurd like 2k dollars for a single short ambulance ride, which ensures that my mother being in the hospital means my dad can barely eat. America is abusive to its entire populace... and then people are surprised at the short tempers and ignorance.
@jian6569
@jian6569 2 месяца назад
Men used to go to the mines/war but now they try to act tough on a podcast :')
@briskettacos
@briskettacos 2 месяца назад
Always have a backup plan. Even if your husband is perfect in every way now, he can still cheat later, die, develop an injury that prevents him from working, get jailed, develop mental illness, or have a midlife crisis so severe that he becomes unrecognizable. Do NOT lay your entire future hopes and dreams on one person. You have to take care of you.
@janel.8921
@janel.8921 2 месяца назад
Ivana Trump worked in her husband’s business. He didn’t pay with cash; he paid her in dresses. He could have given her jewelry or paintings, but he didn’t want her to be able to sell these items.
@janel.8921
@janel.8921 2 месяца назад
@@donk8105 Imagine Ivana having a garage sale.
@RaisingMyWildflowers
@RaisingMyWildflowers 2 месяца назад
And in the end, he buried her on a golf course to avoid taxes. . . after she died of abdominal trauma falling down the stairs.
@livwake
@livwake 18 дней назад
@@RaisingMyWildflowerswait she’s dead??
@WhispyWinters
@WhispyWinters 2 месяца назад
'Don't depend on [anyone] for money because it can possibly pave the way for abuse, manipulation, and blackmail.' Ooh how my parents were so right. Teachings about finance and dependency should start from home. I was 15 and I thought I was so grown. Lil miss 'I'll learn this info in school. Can I go chill with my friends now?' PFT. They were looking at me like 'if you don't sit your behind down rn & come learn about money & effective ways to make it.'
@user-sl1ec2mf6r
@user-sl1ec2mf6r 2 месяца назад
Claps for your parents
@theinfinitebeingg
@theinfinitebeingg 2 месяца назад
Wake up the queen just posted
@therealmanifestelle
@therealmanifestelle 2 месяца назад
Bestie wake up 👏🏽
@theinfinitebeingg
@theinfinitebeingg 2 месяца назад
@@therealmanifestelle i love youuuu
@Zuzzamma
@Zuzzamma 2 месяца назад
I am one of these women that were easily manipulated into thinking that "trad life" or a "trad wife" is the best way to live and benefit, and I am so happy that people like YOU, ELLE made that bubble of illusion pop, cause that in fact might be even worst than 50/50 life, not an upgrade but a trap...
@user-dc4cm8nz1f
@user-dc4cm8nz1f 2 месяца назад
It's the trad trap!
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@user-dc4cm8nz1f We need to normalize the phrase "trap wife."
@miaross7314
@miaross7314 2 месяца назад
These are the reasons women fought to work and have their own things.
@__Liza__
@__Liza__ 2 месяца назад
I never depended on a man and never will. I used to dream about caring for a family but there is no one alive who deserves my love and care. EVERYTHING I make will be invested into ME and me only. I will sleep peacefully for many many years knowing that I can have wrinkles and grey hair at 50 without being replaced.
@EagleBoxx
@EagleBoxx 2 месяца назад
My mother was a stay at home wife. She got cheated on multiple times by my father, was depressed and angry all the time. But she couldn't leave, she knew she couldn't bear it finacially. She stayed but there was no love in the marriage, it was horrible and traumatizing for me to witness. My worst nightmare would be to be like my mother, trapped with a man you hate.
@Iam_Celene
@Iam_Celene 2 месяца назад
I’m not Mormon I’m a Christian and in a lot of Christian circles it’s very common especially in very strict circles it’s common that a woman doesn’t have a job even before she’s married or goes to college and a woman not getting married at 19/20 is seen as bad. I’m from the country side like a lot of these girls who have very religious families see getting educated as the devil and making your own money and being self sufficient. I would often bring up to these girls that if something happened like your husband died or whatever you are gonna need to have your own money to support you and your children
@iceprincess2134
@iceprincess2134 2 месяца назад
What I don't understand about this whole thing, especially with the religious families, is that the convention is supposed to be that if the man leaves, abuses you, etc. your family is suppised to take you back. Where are these women's families?! I know not everyone can afford it, but many, especially Mormons, absolutely can.
@Anarchangel349
@Anarchangel349 2 месяца назад
These communities are extremely patriarchal. They see ending a marriage as a failure on the woman’s part, even if the man was the one who engaged in harmful behavior.
@soulfulgeocatcher
@soulfulgeocatcher 2 месяца назад
My grandmother had seven kids and always told her girls have your own no matter what. She is religious and always brought up biblical business women .who had their own. If u don't like asking a man for money then work, invest, or start ur own business. Imagine asking for money at 40 and he is telling u to figure it out
@angelanotes
@angelanotes 2 месяца назад
If I am going to be a Trad Wife, I want to be a Trad Andorian wife (Star Trek). Females enjoy an equal position in Andorian society, and they are the ones that initiate an intimate relationship.
@tinycatfromhell
@tinycatfromhell 2 месяца назад
Aside from the absolute vulnerability of depending solely on a man that can leave you whenever he wants, I couldn't imagine something more boring in life than staying at home all day and putting everyone else's needs before you. Even beyond dull, it sounds miserable.
@judelee9156
@judelee9156 2 месяца назад
This reality was clear to me when I first felt tempted by the trad-wife life. I'm lucky I didn't fall for it, this video is necessary for those who might not be as lucky.
@LoveAndSnapple
@LoveAndSnapple 2 месяца назад
And what I hate about women being persuaded to leave college is that both the man and woman could be in college and he somehow convinces her to leave while HE gets to stay in school while she “gets started on the family”. MFKR, why can’t *I* go first and THEN you go? Reminds me of that doctor couple who were both going to med school but he told her not to go. Two kids later he Leaves her to be with a woman…HE MET IN MED SCHOOL. More men should be grateful we don’t take them out in their sleep.
@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living
@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living 2 месяца назад
I get why some of these young, impressionable women fall for this okey-doke. The economy sucks, and people are working extra hard for less. The prices are high due to greedflation, but the wages are stagnant. To compare, when I graduated university at 20 years old in 1992, my starting salary was $45K, which is the equivalent of $99K in today’s money. For today’s graduates, the starting salary is STILL $45-50K. On social media, the tradwife looks so glamorous. They think that they can have “the soft life” without “working so hard”. HOWEVER, what they don’t realize is that these tradwife influencers are as real as pro wrestling. The REAL life as a SAH woman can be great, but it can also have a dark side, AND it can leave a woman in financial dire straits if she didn’t protect herself from when things go wrong. I like the stories from the real tradwives (as well as feminist educators) who tell the truth about what it’s REALLY like to be a tradwife, because it opens the viewers’ eyes.
@iceprincess2134
@iceprincess2134 2 месяца назад
As a SAHM and being of a more traditional background I can understand adding your husband to your business and have him run it if your priority is the home/kids, but BUT WHY WOULD YOU TAKE YOUR NAME *OFF*?! 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
@pinkpugginz
@pinkpugginz 2 месяца назад
hope you have money tucked away
@iceprincess2134
@iceprincess2134 2 месяца назад
@@pinkpugginz Lol! I'll be fine, thanks.
@suzy1750
@suzy1750 2 месяца назад
I suspect she might have felt intimidated - she mentioned he could be abusive. The threat of violence, even if it doesn't actually happen, is often enough to keep someone in line. Plus everyone around her was probably telling her that she should just trust him, let him lead, the usual sort of garbage...
@xletragedyx
@xletragedyx 2 месяца назад
I was a SAHM for 2 years. I already have an education, but my husband made sure I could take training in a new field because we move a lot (military). Our kid goes to part-time daycare so I can work in my field. I owned a house before we married and rent it out, and I mentioned putting his name on it. He said there's no need, it's mine. I have my own investment account (mostly tbh from my first marriage). My husband still pays for almost everything, because he can afford it. He's generous and kind. I don't have to work if I don't want to, but I'm allowed to lol. If we divorced, I would be okay. If he died tomorrow, I would be okay, even without family help. Oh and after our second child is born (that I'm carrying now), I'm closed for business. Marrying at 32 isn't bad 😂
@user-br3eo6xs8v
@user-br3eo6xs8v 2 месяца назад
Good for you :)
@pearlstar1427
@pearlstar1427 2 месяца назад
You're living the dream! Love that for you ❤ Do you have any tips for the single ladies?
@addieclark2026
@addieclark2026 2 месяца назад
I feel like being a tradwife is more of a kink/total power exchange thing
@KantoCafe715
@KantoCafe715 2 месяца назад
No, it’s definitely real , I don’t know about the dynamics in the US. But around the world, it’s just real , not a kink, especially when children are involved. If it was a kink, the wives wouldn’t be miserable .
@missxmarvel
@missxmarvel 2 месяца назад
" Why didn't anyone told me to leave money in a bank account, why didn't anyone told me to wait until I had an education" Well because you would have chewed these people out and call them jealous.
@rachelreii5952
@rachelreii5952 2 месяца назад
This is why I stopped giving my opinion you can say the most compassionate thing and someone will take it the wrong way. Now me not saying anything is problematic. 😂
@missxmarvel
@missxmarvel 2 месяца назад
@@rachelreii5952Oh I agree, I told a person that her career, money and education are golden doors that never closes in your face, most men are F boys who want to be on a husband privilege plan so make sure your career and money is your first provider. I was told I'm jealous, Now shes pregnant at 18 and within the first year of giving birth the baby daddy left her behind, Now she reached out several times to reconnect with me, Im like nope I'm too jealous to hang out with baby mama's.
@WynneL
@WynneL Месяц назад
@@rachelreii5952 Better to say something. Even if the person gets upset at the time, they may well end up thanking you soon enough. Had that happen to me lots of times.
@LorienzoDeGarcia
@LorienzoDeGarcia 2 месяца назад
I will NEVER agree with this "trad wife" thing no matter how rosy people on Twitter make it sound. My point has always been locus of power. If one party holds too much power, it's immediately a no-no for me. "Trad wife" life means literally everything is dependant on her husband. Including money and that means freedom. At the very least DON'T GIVE UP MAKING YOUR OWN MONEY when you're married as a woman. I truly believe this.
@sundown6748
@sundown6748 2 месяца назад
Ladies I am a stay at home mom. I have been with my husband 25 years this year. I do not work but I have a retirement account that my husband puts in the same amount of money as his retirement account. Also I have a college education and trust myself that I will be able to support myself if needed. In fact I know I can take care of myself. In a few years I’ll be an empty nester and I plan to get a job. I wanted to be there for my children and it was worth it and worth the risk to me. No regrets
@lauralinden6840
@lauralinden6840 2 месяца назад
I’m glad it worked out for you, but for too many women it doesn’t. The key word in your statement is “risk,” which most-literally-can’t afford to take.
@HolisticLady-kh2im
@HolisticLady-kh2im 2 месяца назад
You only have no regrets because nothing bad ever happened. Like your husband getting sick or injured or leaving you or going bankrupt etc.
@Worrior12462
@Worrior12462 2 месяца назад
Nothing wrong with . Being a stay at home mother is wonderful. Just like you lay down all the options of what ifs we can do that with career women. I see countless women crying over the fact that they chose their careers over marriage and children. We can bring those vids and make a videos like the girl in this video. _where I am from divorced or single women who don't have a job have the payment of their fathers ( if they are dead) Even widowers ( if her husband didn't have a job, she has the money of her father) This seems all like the problem of certain countries . I have a degree, ( just like thousands of people out there , and it is hard to find a job it isn't like jobs are waiting for us ) But the government still gives jobless people monthly salary ( till they find us jobs) Also the fact that where I am from, we ain't pressured to live alone . Also it isn't free labor, your husband is literally taking care of everything and working his Butt off . Saying that what stay at home moms do for their kids and spouses is free labor is false and unfair . Overall, I guess I understand their point but still I had to point out those .
@furballrage595
@furballrage595 2 месяца назад
​@@Worrior12462 Men have to work regardless if he's married or single. He isn't doing anything special. A married man with kids is more likely to get bonus/promotion, and he can come home to cooked meals, washed clothes and cleaned, arranged house. As far as i know, men don't lift a finger in raising and feeding their children, or being involved in their education.
@davyrantucci
@davyrantucci Месяц назад
I’m raising 9 kids and have been happily married for 20+ years to my high school sweetheart. Life is good. We have had so many ups and downs and I wouldn’t trade this for any job where it keeps me away from my family. I’m with you. ❤
@MeandmySara
@MeandmySara 2 месяца назад
I used to dream about trad wife life (with an actually respectful partner) and I still do, but now I’ve decided I’m getting my psychologist’s licence beforehand :)
@artlover3120
@artlover3120 2 месяца назад
You got this❤
@suzy1750
@suzy1750 2 месяца назад
Smart!
@MeandmySara
@MeandmySara 2 месяца назад
@@suzy1750 :) took me a while to realise, but I’m getting on track
@merlinsreturn
@merlinsreturn 2 месяца назад
Elle, it's not about quantity. It's about quality. There may be lots of podcast bros and millions of bottom feeder makes following them. But the small number of women who are speaking up are tuned in, tapped in to the rhythms of this planet. Our monthly cycles are synced with the moon cycle. The 4 seasons of many regions are divided into 1/4 of the year. The menstrual cycle can be divided into 1/4ths as well. During the winter months there is an ingression of energy with hibernation. The menstrual cycle also has that kind of hibernation/ ingression period. During this time we are regenerating for the next phase of creation. So women are more powerful naturally because we are supported by natural rhythms. We regenerate each month physically, mentally and emotionally if we are deeply in tune with our bodies. In any movement, the tipping point is ~15% if the population. We are reaching that number in terms of women waking up to the psyop that has been done on women. So it doesn't matter that there are podcast bros saying whatever. Women are refusing to confirm. The tide us turning.
@Lolita2.0
@Lolita2.0 2 месяца назад
For me it was never an option. I'm the first person in my family to go to college and the second generation of women working in the family. The traditional life has never crossed my mind since growing up I was bombered by my parents to go to school and live an independent life. Here in my country things have reversed. It used to be boys who were encouraged and supported to go to school but after realising how smart women are , every parent want their daughter to go to school and earn good money. This resulted in many women being educated and independent. So the traditional lifestyle collapsed. Many men became jealous since women earn more than men so they turned violent which resulted in my home countries high femicide rate.
@swarali1365
@swarali1365 2 месяца назад
thank you for breaking the chain bestie, youre doing your descendants a huge favor!
@Elrewin59
@Elrewin59 2 месяца назад
What is your country?
@Lolita2.0
@Lolita2.0 2 месяца назад
@@Elrewin59 South Africa
@uvaverd
@uvaverd 2 месяца назад
A man who say to you abandon your work abandon your school, this man it's not a good man
@uvaverd
@uvaverd 2 месяца назад
@@LeandroSalazar5447 but I like man, i just don't like a man who don't let a woman work
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