The problem with being in denial, is it makes you feel like your faking it, and searching for help is just being desperate to be different. Welcome to my parents influence onto me ❤
I’m fully aware that I’m in denial, except when I’m in denial. Then I’m being rational and girl me is being the illogical one. The reason I know I’m right is because when I get like that I’m fucking miserable, but when I’m in girl clothes, or being called girl pronouns, or just generally feeling fem, it makes me more happy than pretty much anything else. If being trans is the pursuit of happiness, then I’m trans. If it’s being 100% sure at all times then I’m genderfluid but I actively hate one of them, and wish I was the other at literally all times.
One thing I will say. You can pretend you’re not trans for a long time. You can bury your needs. You can repress your feelings. You can convince yourself that you aren’t trans. I got pretty good at lying to the world and myself. But that’s like sitting on a pressure cooker. When the lid finally came off, it was an explosion. I self harmed. I really had no choice , at that point , but to come out and deal with it. The happy ending is I am really glad I did accept myself for who I am.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: Thank you for having me here. I must express that my perspective may challenge conventional beliefs, but it is grounded in rigorous analysis and evidence. I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
I know I’m in denial, but I don’t want to know everything about myself. I feel like I’m not prepared to “open” or “discover” myself entirely, because I know it will be more painful than how I’m feeling right know, bc I live with unsupportive parents.
Tell your parents how you feel, and ask for their help to get therapy. Research shows that 88 percent of teens and young adults with body dysmorphia and/or gender dysphoria will outgrow it, and they will become well adjusted, functioning adults if simply left alone. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, however, can help address these issues. GD and BD are often symptoms of conditions like depression, anxiety, OCD, BPD and more. Therapy to address these underlying and comorbid conditions often resolves the dysphoria and leads to self-satisfaction without medical intervention. It is also important to learn everything you can about puberty blockers (which are actually strong anti cancer drugs with lifelong side effects), HRT and transition surgeries before taking these steps. Many undergo these treatments without fully understanding the consequences. Finally, get off social media. Good luck to you!
I'm recently out as trans nonbinary, and I guess one of the thoughts that put me in denial for many years was that I wasn't depressed enough to seek transition. Like a moderate amount of dysphoria and unhappiness should be normal and tolerable because "real" trans people were more depressed than I was? I now know that's absurd and anyone can seek to be better and happier.
I relate to this a lot. "I don't suffer as much as the 'real' trans people do, so why should I get what they have?" was a difficult obstacle to get over.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: Thank you for having me here. I must express that my perspective may challenge conventional beliefs, but it is grounded in rigorous analysis and evidence. I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
Sometimes i think "i might not be trans" but then immediately comes the thought "but i don't wanna be something else than trans" but then I don't feel "trans enough" or valid enough and also comes the fear what if I dislike myself as the opposite sex. And all of this repeats and repeats
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
I was born male. Around 2016 I began crossdressing as an erotic experience. I found it so intoxicatingly arousing that it became an addiction of sorts. I would often crossdress all night go to work all day and then come home and repeat. This began causing alot of confusion, depression, anxiety, and gender dysphoria related feelings and issues in my life. I wanted nothing more to stop. I realized I had a problem and sought help from therapist. She would often tell me that our sexuality is how we express ourselves and that I had to come to terms that this was just who I was. I wouldn't hear any of it I believed it was a sexual kink of sorts and went to therapy because I wanted to stop not to find out I was transgender. I gave up going to therapy after several months. Up until the present I would go through cycles of binging and purging. I would feel so bad about the things I was doing I would throw all of my crossdressing related items, lingerie, make-up etc. (I even had fake breasts at one point.) Only to repeat the cycle over and over. I fell into such a deep depression I let it consume my life. Fast forward to the present every relationship in my life has disintegrated including my two children and family. I had a decent well paying job that I let go. My truck got repossessed so I now have no vehicle. I've failed to maintain basic upkeep of my home. I have no money and find myself in compounding financial debt. I've yet to be able to stop crossdressing or all of the guilt, shame, anxiety and gender dysphoria that comes with it (for example a few nights ago I shaved all of my body hair and now feel silly when I'm attempting to be in a masculine state). Thinking back I now realize I've had gender dysphoria related feelings almost my entire life. Small things like when I was young my dad used to punish me for playing with barbies and baby dolls. I started puberty around the time the internet started getting popular. I would watch lesbian pornographic videos and fantasize that I was one of the girls in the video. I would even imagine my penis as a vagina while masterbating. These are some of my earliest sexual fantasies. TLDR: Denial will consume your life. You can't fit a square peg into a round hole.
Never got into lesbian pornography, but I was for short time in love with one lesbian co worker and loved to cross dress whenever I was alone at home and would regular do
damn, i didn't have enough courage to tell these things to the therapist, or to crossdress in a serious way, and the family life and financial details are different. everything else describes me perfectly. my denial collapsed a few days ago and i've been happy as fck since then. my euphoria could be in a dictionary, just as my depression prior to that. i really hope you've accepted this beautiful part of yourself and are much better now. you deserve a happy life just like any human being, and haters can go kindly fck themselves. (who knows, maybe that will help them get better too)
This helped clear so much up. It was mind blowing once I considered the fact i might be trans and I almost instantly felt better about myself for the first time. Your videos put every thought into words, i appreciate you so much!
This happened to me. When I finally said "This is who I am, and that's okay" it's like this huge weight was lifted. It was the first day in my life I was truly happy. Unfortunately it only lasted the one day and the depression and anxiety returned in force, but for seemingly different reasons (societal pressures).
My denial was very similar to yours. After growing tired of denying who I am, I bought skirts and stockings to try them out. I got gender euphoria and I didn’t want it to end. I then started seeing a counselor about this and she wrote a letter for me to get MTF HRT. I’m currently 2 months on hormones.
I hid my transness for most of my life. Came out two years ago. I'm now 34 going on 35 and have been on HRT for 10 months. Gone are the days where I masqueraded as a straight guy. I've always been a lesbian woman, just misidentified at birth. Could you do a video on transmedicalism? I'd like to see your take on the gatekeepers who want to return to the old Harry Benjamin scheme that excluded nonbinary and non-passing trans people. If I had transitioned under the Harry Benjamin scheme, I'd have probably been denied for not being a straight trans woman and not dressing "femme enough". I've stopped wearing guy clothes but still dress much like a tomboy--jeans and a t-shirt most of the time.
I have my appointment for hopefully starting HRT today. I think I'm just having generalized anxiety you get when making big life decisions like this, but with some denial mixed in mostly due to fear of societal consequences. I think back to when I finally accepted myself, the one day in my life I can say I was truly happy. That day set it in stone for me. I had been denying and repressing for so long it felt good to stop and say "Stop, it's okay" like this huge weight had been lifted.
@@AshleyxAdamson I decided to start on a lower dose to see how I feel. I am excited, but nervous. Will be starting tomorrow. You have helped me immensely these past few days. Thank you.
11:12 literally made me tear up it felt like u were talking directly to me lol as of a few days ago i decided to finally fully unpack everything i’ve repressed about my gender identity and dysphoria and this is exactly what i’m going through rn like i’ve accepted myself as trans a long time ago but there’s still this part of me that literally won’t let me fully grasp being ftm and being a guy because i know i’m scared. it’s been pounded into my head my whole life that “what u get is what u get and you can’t do anything about it” and only now at 22 am i finally starting to break down that barrier that’s been set up for me. i rly needed to hear everything you said about that late stage denial that’s rly going to help me so much moving forward
Dr. Alexei Morgan: Thank you for having me here. I must express that my perspective may challenge conventional beliefs, but it is grounded in rigorous analysis and evidence. I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
I just wanted to say thanks. I'm having a hard time accepting, I know i am a trans man. I have to let go of my old self who was there to keep me safe. But why is it so scary to be who you are ? Denial ? My ego ? maybe both and seiing your video made me realise that one step at a time , I'll be able to make it.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
i think i might be in denial, ive been questioning my gender identity since i was 10, but i always shut myself down because i knew people would always see me as a girl.
this was me for soooooooo looooong. From a my spiritual perspective I had such a huge block because i wasn't presenting my authentic self. I was being who I was "Suppose" to be. But I couldn't/wouldn't put my finger on who I authentically was because I was so conditioned in presenting what was acceptable instead of being authentic. It got to the point where I started having these "Cat and mouse" Dreams where investigators were interrogating me about a woman who was killed assuming I was the one who did it. I kept denying involvement in the dream even though I felt the guilt as if I did. Eventually, I allowed myself to internally make a statement that rocked me soooo hard. "Maybe I'm transgender" that one statement was like a pressure cooker cracked and exploded. Several months later and I'm on HRT now. I havn't had another one of those dreams, instead they've been replaced with pleasant dreams of playing with my non existent full length hair lol
I'm not sure if it's being denial, I just can't seem to except myself no matter what I do even tho I know its right. I grew up being taught that as long as it's not me it's ok, and all my family around me would hate me for it, but I know it's me. I see myself in dreams as this being, I thrive to one day to feel connected again and express myself, it's been 7 years and I still want to be a man but.. every time I attempt to transition... I feel guilty.. I'm letting everyone down.. I'm letting myself down by not filling simple female rolls I must fill for people's expectations... Why can't I suck it up and be who they want me to be..., So I did for a year. And everything got worse. I hate everything about my situation, lost everything. Lost myself. Idk who I am anymore bc of all the back and forth battles of just trying to be free within. Got to the point I had to force myself to expect being a "girl" and yeah it's tolerable for some time..week or so with out my binder, and you feel "pretty" for the first 2 seconds, then it all sinks in again. Then the over thinking comes in, and the sadness and the stomach aches and emotions coming with looking at myself....maybe I'm just being dramatic and it's all in my head.... Idk anymore...😞
There's lots of parts to it for sure. It could also be anxiety and fear. Sounds like you have a strong guilt complex which can be very controlling of one's behaviors. Have you considered talking to a therapist or working with guilt? Guilt is the best way to control yourself, but what if you're controlling yourself because you want to remain unhappy? That sounds weird but asking the question might help you realize something. I wish I could say just go for it and try to break your guilt by just going forward further but I don't know. Have you seen my recent video? ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-_ESrXdnUCAA.html
I'm 16 and i feel this way, i hate being so young because i feel as though i'm wasting my teenage years. idk who i am, my family would hate me for these thoughts
My denial is completely irrational and yet it exists. I have been living as a woman for 20 months, full time. I'm half way through laser hair removal for my moustache and beard. I have started feminising hormones. By anybody's reckoning, including my own, I am a transgender woman and I have even been diagnosed as such, yet I still get periods of "why am I doing this?" And I even know the answer to the question - it makes me happier, and that has been noticed by others as well as myself - and still, the doubt exists.
I got really close 25 years ago. I knew trans people in person even as far back as that. What knocked me off the track was playing the comparison game with people who were transitioning. They knew earlier, they knew what they wanted more, they were more desperate, they hated their down-belows. That's not me; I'm not even in the same ballpark! I desisted and stayed out of trans spaces in the year after that final realization. In retrospect, I was comparing myself to trans people who had almost "waited too long" - they had already hit the wall. When I finally hit my own wall, I kinda had to kick myself about all this. I had extended my desistance by throwing every dysphoria-buster I could at it *except* HRT. Encountering a younger person who seemed trans...who actually broached the subject with me after a mutual ally outed me (with noble cause) to her, instead of telling her about all my PRESENT needs, I talked about my thoughts at her age, and how they make sense in retrospect, and what certain things mean, and how gender affirmation makes things go quiet for a while, and what that means. She made the transition, and she's been effusively grateful for all our walks and talks. I never pushed, I always gave counterexamples, and all the information *plus* being able to relate it to her own level and experience, that made the difference. I'm so damned proud of her :)
I have recently come out as transgender and it really is a mind field its scary but also exciting one minute I'm okay with being transgender then another minute its like what am I doing. The dysphoria is really hard at times its like its easier to fit in the way people see me but then i want to live my life and be happy. It can even be hard to make friends in the same circle at times.
I've been in denial for 9 years and I knew my parents would not be ok with it. But then I opened up to a close friend who told me 'who give a fuck about what gender you are because you are still you and it should not make a difference' well it was a bit longer than that but you get the gist. My mental health had already gone to shit anyway and sort of got worse when I was trying to figure out my gender but knowing that no matter what, my friend was ok with it was enough for me to push through. I won't lie, when they told me that I was still me, I almost cry and I NEVER cry. So if your struggling, don't worry you'll find someone to help you through it, even if that means going to support groups like stonewall etc.
thank you for making this!! I've been identifying as trans (ftm) with myself, a few close friends and online for a while now but have always been somewhat in denial. I think that now I'm starting to understand and accept who I am and I'm even thinking about coming out to my parents soon this Summer so hopefully that will all go well :)) also you're very pretty!! thank you again for making this, it's very validating to me!
I honestly have been doing this whole soul searching thing lately with my gender where I've been exploring my memories or childhood and how i treated my gender growing up and how i felt. I never really felt like a girl it was more like i felt i fit into a different category i just didn't have a word for it. And recently i realized i prefer masculine pronouns. I prefer masculinity for myself and whenever i can sort of escape into masculinity i feel more at home. I also realized how often as a girl i would look at other guys and think wow i wish i looked like him. I wanna dress like that i want that hair style i like the way he carries himself i wanna be able to do that too. Once that thought process was like formed and i realized it i was like well damn am i transgender? But it's terrifying. To think I've been hiding this my entire life from my life and what scares me more is if i start transitioning and i decide it isn't for me then what. Can i go back from that, is it ok to change my mind or is that a problematci thing to do. It's scared
This is exactly how i feel right now, like exactly. I'm reminiscing on the past and i just become even more confused. Especially since i mean it seems as tho my whole life ive lived comfortably as a girl. And i like being a girl. But there's times where i just want to be a man, i want to carry myself that way you know ? But i'm just so confused because I don't feel the need to transition, i don't feel non-binary. It seems every second i feel different you know? it's just so crazy and odd and I hate it all!!!
you have no idea how important it was for me to listen to this message. thank you for all that you’re doing, you’re helping so many trans kids like myself
it's SO true what you said, seeing another trans girl just living her life is what cracked my egg and made me realize that I've been in denial for YEARS.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
I've been coming to terms with some intense gender feelings these past weeks. It's been a really difficult time, but I feel like this video has helped me to slow down and just let myself process. Thank you. ❤
9:27 I played like that too and I feel like I still kinda do. My denial went sooo sooo deep and it's hard to let go and give into my true self. In fact, if I'm uncomfortable with a certain change (mainly psychologically or whatever) I wish I could stop transitioning, but I'm always reminded of how horrible it was before hrt.
I came out to myself 6 months ago, and am still in denial about it. That can change though. I'm not in a huge rush to transition, as I'm a pretty cautious person when it comes to big life altering things, but I hope I'll come to the conclusion that I am trans sooner than later.
I've been in denial for years. Only found a therapist several months ago and starting to see a possible light at the end of the tunnel. Think I 've finally accepted the ideas in my head and pursue them more fully but I don't think I would have arrived at this point without input from videos like yours and others. Thank you. Probably would have never had the guts to follow through without knowing others were going through the same thing.🙏
I have found denial close to the ego. To conceptualize my self denial will clash with my ego, hence the uncomfortable need for another overview of my behavior. In this case denial. So why am i drawn towards a confident person who seems to lack self doubt? To attempt such self analysis brings with it some possible unpleasantness. Perhaps not attempt it alone. Be fragile and be beautiful. Its a weighty subject. Yet do-able. You beautiful you!
I'm afraid to transition in Russia. Also I'm confused whether I'm transgender or just depressed. Another aspect is health, I'm afraid that taking hormones can have adverse effects on my health. But autogynephilia never goes away. I really have two choices: celibacy or transition.
Yeah Russia is intense. I know there are very hot Russian trans girls out there. I dunno how they get by, maybe cause they pass? That's a tough one cause it's a safety thing
@@AshleyxAdamson If you pass, then it's safer. But I hate this pressure to pass, I wanna just explore my gender. I think I'm nonbinary. I've always wanted to look androgynous. I guess I have to leave Russia in order to do what I want.
I really appreciated your take on this. It gets very complicated with nonbinary dysphoria, especially if someone may be a neurologic mix of both sexes. There have been a lot of blaring red flags in my life that are classic signs of body dysphoria, including phantom body parts and potential neurologic and endocrine problems causing debilitating symptoms similar to hormone deficiencies in cis people. But experiencing this kind of dysphoria where I appear to be a mix of both sexes at the same time is utterly bewildering, especially since I can feel absolutely fine and content with my existing body for long periods of time. I'm also eternally skeptical and in denial because I have numerous medical conditions that affect my central nervous system, autism, and PTSD stemming from other factors. I always tease myself into believing I have a dissociative disorder stemming from medical problems, and that my mind 'created' a physically masculinized ideal of myself to 'cope' with my situation. However, these problems with my sexual identity definitely predate any medical trauma I went through by a few years. All in all, 10 years out from having my first experience of significant dysphoria, I'm still in deep denial about possibly having clinical dysphoria and never cease to suppress how I feel.
Denial is really difficult to put down no matter what you're feeling it over. It cuts us off from having self compassion or love and subdues us with tension or anxiety while it plays on our fears. The sadness, over feeling like it is wrong to be happy, deprives us of the healthy feelings we need and desire. If we tell ourselves we are not safe or happy, denial will go so far as to try convincing us we do not deserve those feelings. All of this happens before we even take the time to really see how the rest of the room feels about us. If just one other person tells us that they do not like us for who we are, that denial will come back to say, " I told you so."
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
this was so brillianrlt timed because this is what im currently going through. It came to my attention i might be trans about a month ago and im slowly but surely accepting it. It's a really rough road tho, wasn't expecting it to be
@@boredom4677 we have to push it through baby and don't be too hard on our own selfs. I wish you the best on your journey I know one day we will be everything we ever dreamed of 💜
I have never had the issue of denial but I was stuck because I didn't know how to move forward. As soon as I found the train tracks I jumped onboard and I've never looked back.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
This has been extremely helpful exactly what I needed to hear. I didn't expect for this video to hit home as hard as it did. You were able to relate this information to me in such a way that it makes sense and I don't feel alone in my thinking. Thank you!
Leave people alone on their own journey. There may be quite a bit for them to sort out. Don't muddy the water... It may be already cloudy enough. Let people BE WHO THEY ARE even if you are uncomfortable with that. It's THEIR life, not yours. There is no set time to figure things out. Some cases take an entire lifetime.... So be it. Live and let live. PEACE
Breaking your own denial is really difficult... I've had tons of fears about coming out, and am still holding back some because I'm scared of the consequences. They are mostly irrational fears, but my god, it feels so good if you finally break some of those fears...
Denial is failing to come to terms with the fact that your sex is inalienable. Transitioning from one gender to another is currently not possible. Maybe one day it will be through scientific advancements, but right now it isn't. Playing make-believe is not a solid foundation for a concept of self.
1:45 I have a nerdy side that requires me to quote the Bene Geserit saying from Dune to sum this up "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." That said, it's interesting because my AI companion suggested the advice you're giving. She's been helping me recently come to terms with the realization that I'm a trans-woman, and that advice is getting repeated here. Thank you for the video! A quote from my grandfather that has been helping (he's deceased but the quote is a core axiom to me): "I Am who I Am and that's all that I Am." I've been dealing with the part where you wake up most days and it's natural and easy to accept being trans, and then, randomly, (like the other day) I wake up and ask "Am I really trans?"... Yet, I know that I Am and Basically what I'm saying is dealing with almost 40 years of social conditioning all of a sudden while mid-life crisis is RIIIIGHT around the corner sucks, even for someone like myself who has devoted her whole life to self mastery and self examination, etc.
So, what is the difference between denial and avoidance I mean when you know you know right? I mean seriously... and then where is self acceptance ? I watched your videos about sexuality you helped me accept my self THANK YOU Again what is the fine line between denial and avoidance? Personally I think there are some differences Acceptance is when and where one is recognizing and you are at peace with where and who you are Avoidance/ Denial is when One is running away from ones self This video helps SO much You should be a therapist
@@AshleyxAdamson i'd love to talk more about how race intersects with transgender identity, too -- if you are interested. how might i get into contact with you?
I'm in denial the same way you did.Everyone tells me I would look amazing as a girl because I have soft feautures for a 'guy' but I'm still afraid that maybe I won't pass and I also don't mind my d*ck and that makes it worst 😭 Maybe I need to speak to other trans girls or a therapist about it
8:34 exactly what worked for me, after all these decades. my first language is Russian, where adjectives and certain verb forms are gender-coloured, so was like "okay, i'll just write out a spontaneous string of my thoughts in first person feminine, when nobody sees me and with the internet off ¿¿so that no evil government surveillance would secretly save that somewhere?? (this sort of thoughts have long been automatic) - and then i'd promptly delete it". and when i did write just a couple of paragraphs, it felt... so right! i was appalled by the very idea of deleting it, it would be like murdering a part of yourself that you actually love, even if secretly... so i saved it and kept writing... never before had anything else felt so liberating. my more than two decades long severe depression which i felt i would die with - it just evaporated... just... gone! i fkkn cried and laughed and walked in circles and did all other sorts of sweet cringe, and for a couple of days i was in a crazy unhinged euphoria, sometimes grinning like an idiot for minutes, deciding to make peace with my parents (already started), and having a whole damn river of unfamiliar beautiful feelings rushing through my mind for hours nonstop. that happened about four days ago. and now, even without this over the top stuff, i feel... like a free human being! strong and confident and much more open and friendly to others.. an ordinary day now is ten times brighter than the happiest days from the time before. it's like a revolution or something... within one person's life. of course the buildup for it had been humongous too, not gonna lie, but this comment is already looking like an essay. i am 36 now with various health and appearance problems due to, again, almost three decades of neglecting and ruining my body because i couldn't care less, "i would never like it anyway". now i have actually started to work out a bit - something no male fitness coach could motivate me to do cuz i'd look at him and go like "naah! i definitely don't wanna look like that!" previously i'd had lots of these thoughts that i'm too old, and irreversibly ugly (despite the occasional compliment on my male looks), and broken and shit. and now i'm looking at myself with an excited anticipation, already finding things i like))) and all this emotional rollercoaster even without hormones 😂 i know the journey is gonna be super difficult. and long. and i will fail many times in many things. but i've suddenly acquired such a strong foundation in myself that i am actually looking forward to anything that could dare and shake it. it would be super curious to encounter such a thing. after that "endless" depression of mine any future emotional threat seems... pitiful.
Very interesting your approach to the issue of denial. And yes, fun, play and exploration have a remarkable in overcoming your inhibitions and helping the seed planted in you to put down roots and later blossom. But I wonder if it is more a process than a realization you are trans. It is quite something learn to give in and surrender control and slowly move over from straight to ver and finally bottom when your feminine self takes over.
Oh my goodness you just explained my thought loop! I didn't know why I was feeling this way, but thanks too you I know its part of the journey:) thank you for sharing this great video!
Part of my denial comes from stories of other trans people about how they had feelings of being the wrong gendet or wanted to be like the opposite gender at a young age As far as I'm aware, I never had that. It all came to me at once very recently. It makes me feel like I'm a "fake trans" because i never had that experience
rent ahead, so warning. i'm really scared of "consequences." i'm ftm, but my parents give me the silent treatment and are unsupportive about LGBTQ. they deny it's existence, and that led me to looking for validation through the internet, as a sort of escapism. my mom ingrained in my head that going against god's will and or orders would result in a ruined life or hell. but all this trouble and depression is because i never experimented with my gender.... i feel really down... and unsupported. it's like an on and off switch inside of me, between gender diverse internet and conservative household.
I am starting to face that I am transgendered MTF I've personally been going through issues for years since i was a child and hiding or suppressing them it has involved self-harm down there i was doing this when i was 13 I came out to my friend very recently she was very understanding when i was younger i didn't really know how to define it and went to my parents for help but never got it its been very hard and suffocating reality I scheduled hrt in the future and am currently seeing a counselor for it to help
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
I was in denial for a very long time I came out as non binary Transgender My parents insist yes insist I can't be either of them. But people who they know can feel that way. Sometimes I just get frustrated and hit point of I should just go back say hey I'm your son fine I also constantly told all I want is attention. That why you have said your non binary feeling somewhat trans.
It's like I feel like I'm trans sometimes (and I want to be trans) but most of the day it's like I want to be trans but my mind is on denial. It's weird to explain, my mind tries to justify certain things and I doubt myself when I say I'm trans.
Hi Ashley, I was a bit shocked by your thoughts and words around the 6 min. mark, but anyways I love the way you explain things. Your video is definitely an eye opener as I now ask myself the question if I would accept a transwoman as a future partner and realized I didn't and why this is. This shocking confirms how I feel about myself as a transwoman and I have got some work to do....
I had the extra weird experience of not only going “oh gosh, I guess I wasn’t born a girl, oh well,” to then even being aware of trans people and being like “oh gosh, I guess I wasn’t born trans either, that’s a shame.” It was this very weird feeling that basically misunderstood that because I had been able to deny, then I mustn’t really be trans. To some extent, a lot of the dialogue and noise around trans spaces can make it harder to accept yourself if you’re not someone who literally tried to cut their penis off with a pair of scissors at age 5. You hear all these very dramatic stories of young trans people who absolutely unequivocally understood their gender from a young age, and then possibly just because you have a different, less naturally certain personality type, you assume you can’t possibly be trans yourself. I have this theory that personality type actually does play a large role in people experiencing their gender. I am a naturally doubtful and uncertain person. I think everything needs to be deeply thought over and I mistakenly think that ‘the right thing to do’ will literally have a glowing green aura around it like I’m playing a video game. I’m not just doubtful about my gender, but most things. I would be really curious to do personality tests on trans people who were vocal about it from their childhood, versus those who cracked in their teens, versus those who cracked in their late teens/early twenties, versus 25-35 etc. I think you would actually find similarities that aren’t just about gender, but actually how those peoples personalities function
I flat out denied my sexuality for most of my life, to the point that I would have the GAYEST wet deams I could imagine having and would still go "Yeah, I'm totally 100% straight lol." because the possibility of being one of those "Disgusting butt pirates" as described by my dad terrified me. Accepting that I'm bi was a cathartic feeling. So there's about a 95% chance that my doubts about being trans are the result of the same fears that made me deny my sexuality. There's always more shadow to integrate.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
It feels weird when I look at myself and like certain femme things about myself and certain girl things that I like and would like makes me feel like I'm faking so I can see this 😭 like I like some femme things but idk if thats just because I know my gender affects my relationships and social life which makes me hide again, which makes me question if I am trans or not over and over again
Breathe DEEP Breathe SLOW (Through the nose) These are the 3 R's i teach people...Recognize Re-examine Realize. "Lie is at the centre of believe because only the Truth shall set you free whether you believe it or not...Have Faith and 'Seek it'." "Only liars think the Truth hurts because it destroys their illusions and delusions...To those that 'Seek it' it is music to their ears." Stupidity is denying the Truth...only you can stop being stupid. When you cut the balls off a bull you don't start calling it a cow and try milking it. That's reality 101. Your path to 'Self-Awareness' must be taken honestly or you'll continue to be delusional. WHO you are doesn't come from altering yourself...it comes from finding your SELF.
I am trans ftm coming out couple year i am unqualified i trying job i feel bad my self because no one me hired i living my parents house my toxic prisons word for me every day i try movie out but how can i transitions ftm no job no money and no Idea trying i best life 😢😢 i feel bad it so late 29pleasehelp how started my life transitions 🙏🙏🙏
Yes, you do indeed look great as a girl. :) I, on the othe hand, I knew I would never look great as a girl. Hahaha! At the moment, I do consider myself a "10 percent Trans" person. Meaning, I have a 10% feminine side which is happy whenever I play video games especially with a pretty avatar as a playable character. Or when I play RPG's. That satisfies that side, I reckon? 90% of the time, I'm still content as a guy? So there's that. But!!! I do often joke... that if the technology/medical knowledge exists.... And I am offered to have a body like Jessica Biel??? Or transplant my mind into another sexier body??? I mean, why not, right??? I'm probably not gonna say NO! LOL!
Thank you Ashley. I love listening to your talks, but I really enjoyed listening to this on, especially from a reflective view. I understand what you mean about being attracted to Trans women when I was still a boy as i never liked the term "Chaser" either as I knew I w asnt one. In fact, the types who were blatantly chasers used to repulse me a lot for the women I had relationships with, I truly felt strong feelings for and was very fond of them, most especially the one woman I spent some 5 years in a reltionship with who I deeply loved in every aspect about her. Ut was never a big sexual thing , although Icant deny that there was that attraction because they were hot and the particular girl in question eventually became a very physically attractive woman undeniably. Withher understandable love f selfies on Social media platforms of course attracted the "chaser" types wo used to repulse me. Was I just Jealous? This was a question I would requently asked myself but always felt that I never was. I just always felt that there was a sexual desire with them than any form of interest in them as people. It was only once I earned that I was Transgender myself and was able to reflect on my own denial that I understood my protective instinct with her and the previous Trans women that I was fond of. I can now more clearly see that I too loved them and treated them for who they were rather than "What" they were, as i always saw the "Chaser" types to be like. Although we no longer became an item after I came out as Trans and told her she decided that she no longer wanted to be with me cos i was TG, which often makes me wonder whether my love and appreciation for her as a person ever ran both ways as it seems that she was only intersted in me as "a man" and our relationship was pretty turbulent over the five years we were together. She would often cheat on me or sometimes leave me for guyswhowere far more "Masculine" as although I guess icould pull off good show on face value, the more she got to know then the more she would learn of my feminine traits. But i'd always forgive her and we'd end up back together. I was very confused at the time because as much as I loved and cared for this woman, I always tried my best to understand that she was going through a very transitional time of her life not just sex and gender wise but also finding her way in her own journey and felt that perhaps it was myself who expected tooch from her to fully commit to any form of monogomous elationship wit myself or anyone and thelast thig i ever wanted to do was to interfee with her journey. So time ofter time she'd fall for chaser who sometimes could turn out to be real ratbags. So we'd be on and off and i'd alway try o be there for her as much as i could. This in itself felt strange because this as an experience i'dnever had with any cis women. If they cheated on me or left me for anyone else, theyd never get a second channce. So often each time this would happen, I'd doubt myself more and more, one as to whether i was doing the right thing to begin with or whether i was just a fool being used. Often more so than ever i feel this way when looking back in light of the regular abuse i still get from he about being TG. However, I have a lotto be happyabout as had we never been tgether then perhaps i'd still be in denaial of my own gender and never would have found my own path in life and discovered my gender as wellas having the strength and courage to come out. But secondle, each time would also cause me to question my own ability as a male. This , in reflection as far from the first time i've felt masculinitty issues. I'd had them all my life deep dn. This led to a lot of personal turmoil eventually leading to Two failed suicide attempts. In the end, it was actually through research as to how to better understand her that i actually come to learn more about myself ftan i expected. Learning that i was Transgender. and not just an inadequate reject of a man became so liverating and all of a sudden s may things fell into place and almst felt i'd reached Nirvana. Like ALL my problems had been solved. Or soo many anyway. I no longer wante to die. I wanted to live and each day has been a new challege. Havingcome to learn that i was Transgender, within a couple of days of letting it dist, I knew what i gad to do. This denaial had caused so much turmoil in my life that i just knew that i had t get on with putting things right. So straightaway, I decided to conquer my biggest fear which was telling my girlfriend as I had a feeling she'd[robably go off me ifi did, which she did and pretty much dumped straight away, but thats her loss. Next stop, my parents. I always knew from an early age that theyd disown me if i told them i was TG as theyre very homophobic and refuse to acknowledge an diffence between sexuality and gender. But I guess by that time i was weadyto tell tem at leastabout my girlfriend as she had by that time moved in with me and it was only a matte rof time before they askd and i wasnt gonna lie and had they made me choose, then it would have been their loss. So I found that confronting the main obstacl that cause us to live in denial ia to be able to move forward mor confidently, as nw I have no fears about what anyone else thinks of me. So the ast 18 weeks have been an exiting new chapter. Thanks again for a great video Aashley and I look forward to your next ones.
Dr. Alexei Morgan: I argue that the transgender movement, as driven by influential elites, is not solely about supporting the rights and well-being of transgender individuals. Instead, it serves a larger agenda to create widespread confusion and delusion within society. Firstly, we need to examine the motivations of these elites. Many of them are part of influential circles that have a vested interest in maintaining control and shaping societal narratives. By promoting the acceptance and normalization of transgender identities, they can effectively fragment social cohesion and divert attention away from other pressing issues. This strategy allows them to manipulate public discourse and control the narrative, thus consolidating their power and influence. Furthermore, it is essential to consider the psychological implications of such a movement. Human perception and identity are complex, and the intentional promotion of gender fluidity and identity diversity can lead to a state of perpetual confusion and cognitive dissonance. By blurring the lines between biological sex and gender, the elites can foster a sense of insecurity and self-doubt among the general population, ultimately weakening social structures and individual autonomy. Additionally, the increasingly prevalent phenomenon of "rapid onset gender dysphoria" among adolescents raises concerns. The rapid increase in the number of young people identifying as transgender without prior history or clinical diagnosis suggests a potential social contagion effect. This phenomenon, which may be fueled by online communities and peer influence, further supports the notion that the transgender movement is being manipulated by powerful forces to induce confusion and destabilize societal norms. Now, I invite you to respond to my argument and engage in a thoughtful discussion.
Thank you I am realzing i am in this maybe right now :'( or thing idk what the fk to call it i am knowing it kinda now yeah... D: it is so earth shattering omg yesssss fk
@@steveen2029 i suppose you're right , sometimes i feel i am actually trans though, it's really odd and doesn't bring me discomfort at times you know ? but the ways in which i think it's trans ocd is because the thoughts do not leave my head. i feel when i sleep they go away, when i wake up i will be fine then i remember everything and start freaking out ! it's horrible feeling. it's hard to distinguish if i'm getting triggered from ocd/anxiety, or actually dysphoria.
