I was born a girl with the name Taylor. I grew up very sexist towards guys, and thinking back, I was jealous. In elementary, we were seperated by boys and girls. I had more guy friends, so I tagged along with them. 5th grade came around, and the movie was ready for the boys and girls. At this time, my closest friends were two girls. We were all in the same classroom. As we watched the video I felt weird and akward. It wasn't right. Throughout this time period I refused to play with girl tous and hated anything remotely girly. 6th grade I identified as Panromantic and my parents divorced. That summer, I went to summer camp. I felt REALLY uncomfortable and anxiety settled in. I came home and stayed in my room for WEEKS. I came to terms with my gender. I am Male. 7th grade came and I went by Toby. Like Ticci Toby. ( Bc I look like him ) I got my hair cut, and got the pronouns down. The school was horrible and very abusive towards the lgbt+ community. Word gets around fast and I was forced to uncloset to my dad on Nov. 3rd 2016. He said I can make more choices when I'm 16. I'm moving schools on the 20th. I am not a girl. I am not Taylor. I am a boy. I am Toby.
SAME like I thought it was so dumb that boy scouts did all this cool shit and girl scouts sold cookies. I didn't want to join girl scouts I wanted to join boy scouts. I thought the boy scouts were the shit I was so jealous
I remember I was 9, I ran into my room and cried. I remember saying "I wish I was a boy". I don't remember anything after that. Now I'm 14 and have come out to one friend.
holy shit i’m actually so proud of myself. i forgot that i commented on this. now i’m 16 and a half, and literally most of my family knows and all of my friends know. everyone has been supportive (except for my grandma on my dad’s side oof oh well she’s annoying as shit anyways). i’m kind of struggling with a friend rn, because her father is transphobic and she said she can’t tell him because i won’t be allowed over then. annddd he knew me before i came out so i was introduced to him as a girl.
When I was younger (about maybe six or seven) I desperately wanted a beard. it got to the point where I would cry hysterically everytime my dad shaved because I was so jealous of it. so he would put shaving cream on my face and hand me a razor (he took the blades out though...handing a first grader a razor with blades isn't exactly safe) and showed me how to "shave my face". ten years later, I realized I was genderfluid
The past year I've been questioning my gender. at first i thought i was a Demi Girl, then i thought i was Gender Fluid, and now I'm starting to think I'm just transgender. But looking back on my childhood, i was very feminine. I liked having long hair, wearing dresses, having friends that were girls, i seemed like all the other girls. The last few years have been different though. I hate feminine things. I still shop in the girls section, but every once in a while i buy some guy cloches and it makes me really happy. I've been wanting to cut my hair too, but im scared to tell my mom. I feel uncomfortable with my boobs and i know I'd be happier if they weren't there. Most of these stories i hear always have people knowing they we're different from a early age, but for me that doesn't seem like the case.
Thank you for sharing :) All trans narratives are different. There are so many trans people who don't know they're trans or "different" until later in life. Just know that your identity is valid :)
That's actually been a very similar situation to me. Except it just started slowly after puberty? I became less girly, then it was a tomboy and I hated anything that was very feminine.
Looking back , i remember when i was around 4 years old, I put shaving foam on my face and pretended to shave in the mirror with a card. It felt normal in a way. When I was 6 my mother brought me a tinker bell toy and I cried at her because I wanted a dr who sonic screwdriver like my brother had- my mother swapped the toy. I quit swimming when I started puberty because I felt so self conscious and uncomfortable. Always refused to wear a dress. I've never really had any girl friends because I've always gotten along with the guys better. I came out last year as trans on the 4th sept to my mum. She was really supportive and let me cut my hair short this past summer. I definitely feel like a boy, but I'm quite androgynous with what I wear.
DUDEEEEE ik this comment is old but you just made me vaguely remember when I used to do the same thing. I always wanted to be just like my grandfather growing up (he raised me) and I would go to the bathroom and pretend to shave my face and things like that. Thank you so much.
As long as I can remember, I secretly wanted to be a boy but As a kid I never thought that I could be what I wanted to be so desperately. I was a girl and was always going to be a girl. I had it stuck in my head that this is what I had to be. I tried to hard to change it though don't get me wrong. I played sports, hung out with the guys, went hunting, always had short hair. My step mom told me I had to be more feminine so I made an effort to try to grow out my hair and ware dresses although I hate it. I want to be me again but I am afraid that they will say " but you ware dresses, have long hair." And even if I tell them the truth, that I only did it to make them happy, that they will think it's just a phase. What do I do?
Just finished watching your video. Your childhood stories are extremely similar to mine. I remember the uncomfortable feeling of going to sleep overs with girls who were brushing each other's hair and doing "feminine" things and I would be super uncomfortable and awkward. I also remember the "sex ed" videos from elementary school and I remember how disgusted I was. haha. I usually don't sit through many videos all the way through but yours really hit home for me. I can relate, a lot. Now, I identify as trans, I've been on T for over 2 months, and I am very happy and i fully accept and express being trans. I understand how confusing it is to figure out whether your trans or not, so if you ever need to talk, hit me up. I have some groups on Facebook that I follow that are helpful too!
+MattInBetween Hey man, thanks for watching my videos! I'm glad someone connected with some of my stories haha. For real, though, elementary "sex ed" videos lol.... I just sent you an inbox message on RU-vid :D
When I was younger I also hated girlscouts for the same reasons I wanted to go camping and I tried to convince my mom to let me shave my head and go undercover as a guy to get in. This was before I figured out I was trans
I've been very "tomboy" all growing up, but I've only over about the past year started to learn more about other genders. I look back at my past until now and some things do stand out to me like I've never ever felt "feminine" I don't like most stereotypical female things. I prefer my clothes to be loose, baggy sweaters are the shize nips. Dresses and skirts make me severely uncomfortable. I don't really like makeup (occasionally wear it if the mood suits me, very rare) and I don't like painting my nails. I was misgendered once. STORY TIME! It was Halloween, I was a zombie of course. SIDE NOTE: my poor mother wanted me to be a princess, no joke lol. I was misgendered because my zombie costume had a mask that covered my hair and an older woman asked me "what's your costume, son?", it didn't bother me one bit it even kind of sounded nice and it put a smile on my little 7 year old face. The thing is though, I don't mind being called she either. All this considered, although I don't feel all that feminine and I like more masculine things I don't think i'm quite a guy either. I think I might be somewhere in the middle. Sooo that's my story I guess. P.S. Your hair looks great short, you totally pull it off your mom didn't know what she was talking about lol and heck yes i'll be your friend, BUDDY! ;D
Thanks for this awesome comment!! I love hearing other people's stories :) I love the Zombie thing, that's so cute! Genderwise, I know a lot of people who fall somewhere in the middle or off the grid completely! Thanks about the hair, and SWAG about being friends :D
mate your story is kinda like me. im super confused about my gender, i feel more masc then fem but at the same time i dont mind she/her pronouns. i dont feel like a girl, but at the same time i dont think im that masc either? i more confortable being friends with girls, i dont really mind having my period (but if i could choose, i wouldnt want it), and i also dont really mind having boobs. at the same time, i dont know if i do want a boy. ive never liked wearing dresses, skirt, etc and would much rather wear a suit rather than a dress. im just not sure about who i am anymore-
I used to always try to pee standing up outside in the woods with my brothers 😂 and I would try to play football, lift weights, and I wore a lot of tomboy clothes and then went into depression when puberty hit
I remember me being the strongest kid in school. I hated dresses and always played with the guys. I learned about transgender people when I was like 6 and I didn't want to be trans because of my mom. When I hit puberty I hated it and was scared. I tried to burn my boobs off like they did in Africa, though my mom tried first. I was into fashion and stuff but I would choose the gym over the salon anyday. I'm still not out but I told my teachers and friends and a few were accepting.
i just wanna thank you for sharing that. Your stories sound very similar to my own experiences and i have been questioning my gender recently as well. you helped a lot of puzzle pieces fall into place for me, and it really helped hearing your story. it's very brave for you to put yourself out there like that. good luck on your journey!
i feel it. all of my oc's are boys and theyre all part of me, i dressed up as boys for every costume and cosplay event including halloween, i always wanted the boys toys at mcdonalds, and god did i wanna join the boy scouts. Theyre finally letting us in now, but im too old :(
I just finished watching all three of your videos and I wanted to tell you that I am in almost the exact same position as you. I was born female and have lived female my whole life but grew up very boy-ish and dressing like a boy and having my shirt off and doing boy activities and everything you said in your videos. The last few months I too have been watching hours of FTM videos and constantly going back and forth in my head. One day I am so sure that I am FTM and then another day I am unsure. I know most of my uncertainty is probably fear, but I just don't know what to do. I'm afraid of telling my family or girlfriend or anyone really. It's nice to see your videos and know that someone is in the same position! Sorry for such a long comment!
+vansskate26 Hey! Thanks for the comment and watching my videos! I feel you! I'm an over thinker and that leads to utter frustration! I'm also a people pleaser- I tend to live my life how others want me to live it. And, I'm private, so I don't like talking about my inner feelings and thoughts with my friends and family. So, that's no fun haha. If you ever need/want to talk, inbox me anytime!!
I started trying to fool people into thinking I was a boy at around about halfway thru 2015. I never really questioned my gender but Now I'm really questioning it. I would never really fit in amongst any girly girls I would always hang around with tomboys because none of the boys wanted to know me.at every chance I got if I got asked to create an avatar for a game or something I would always make it male .Recently I got a hair cut to look like a guy .when people call me a boy it just feels natural. I'm confused but my mum kind of hints at me being a boy.I really like the Idea of being a boy tho.
The idea that there are boy scouts and girl scouts in the US is crazy to me, in Ireland my scout troop and all scout troops are all girls and boys. Edit: the kind of stuff we do is pioneering, map work, compass work, knots and navigation. We go camping once a month, in winter we sleep in other scout dens and in summer we sleep in tents. On camps we do all of the above plus putting up icelandic tents (spring and summer), hiking, cooking. Sonetimes we rock climbing, kayaking, swimming, archery ect.
I had the exact same experience with boy/girl scouts. By brother was a boy scout and I envied that so much, but when I joined girl scouts we did nothing cool.
when I was 4, I was in a nativity play as a shepherd, and I went around saying I was a king. Also, I tried to stand peeing up, shave my face, I hung out with all the boys, played with boys toys. I was also uncomfortable with the girl puberty film, and I desperately wanted to watch the boys one. I walked around with my shirt off as well. I was so uncomfortable when I started having Shark Weeks. It has always been irregular though. I always preferred baggy t-shirts and basketball shorts. But yeah, family, i was always a super feminine person!!!
I was kind of feminine when I was little. I liked long hair and wanted pierced ears. I liked princesses. But I also liked boy things. I always hung out with the guys, liked to wear boy clothes. Instead of baby dolls, I had cars. I thought my parents were lying to me and that I was actually a guy. When I was a toddler, I expected my vagina to grow into a penis. Other preteen girls were hoping for big boobs, and I, who was a late bloomer, didn't even want boobs. When I began to question my gender identity, I thought I was genderfluid because I seemed like both male and female. But now I'm not so sure. Any help or advice you can give me?
I would research some lists of gender identities and see if anything fits. Walk around for a few days thinking in your head "I'm gender fluid." And then another gender, like "I'm FTM transgender"... On and on... See if any feel right. Saying it in the mirror, also could help. And, also just watching a bunch of RU-vid videos of different gendered people :)
when i was younger i really wanted to be a boy just like my older brother mostly cause i was literally just like him and when i was like 4 or 5 i went in my parents bathroom and used my dads razor and i came out with one cut on my face above my lip for a mustache and all throughout Kindergarten to 5th i would wear some boy clothes and would not want to watch the movie and i would try to hang out with guys but they just said one thing no you are a girl so i made some girl friends who seem to be like me but i always tired to hang out with guys and now in middle school i have all guys clothes cause my mom allows me to shop in the guy section and throughout school i tired to make the football team and this year i made it and i felt so comfortable with the guys but the sad thing is i don't get to dress out with them i have to go somewhere else and all i want to do is dress out with them so the whole time i knew who i was i always said i want to be a boy and i don't want boobs i want a flat chest and this summer i had convince my mom to allow me to cut my hair short but its to my ear and i would like it shorter but i have to convince her more
I can only think of 3 "How did I not know I was trans?" signs 1. As a kid, I always wanted to be better than the boys at everything. I have a very vivid memory of being in a pink-and-yellow dress with snap-back pumps being in front of a church where I was climbing a tree in front of all the other kids (There were two girls and maybe five or six boys. It was a small youth group). My mom told me, and I quote, "Get down from there! When will you learn that girls don't climb in dresses?" 2. I've never minded wearing dresses or skirts because I thought I looked good in them, but I couldn't stand wearing them without tights or leggings. And I still don't mind lifted shoes as long as they're not heels. 3. When I thought it didn't matter what kinds of characters I would pick, I used to always play a male character. My family's kind of forgotten about that now, so since I started doing it again my dad's surprised and my brother has a hard time getting the pronouns down when we roleplay. I think I would probably have more signs if I felt some kind of gender pressure as a kid. I went to 3 poor elementary schools so I always had to bring my own toys which were just androgynous stuffed animals my dad got for my brother and I to share and I've never been to a school that separated the girls from the boys in class. It was either several random teams or which side of the room you're on. Edit: BTW, I did get the puberty talk and my class was separated for that. I stayed in the class because the friend I was sitting with was a girl and I wanted to stay with her. I never even heard them dismiss the boys because I was still processing that we were going to talk about puberty. We didn't need permission slips, so I didn't know it was coming
I was born a girl and growing up I always loved competing and playing with the boys rather then the girls. I would try to play with the girls but we would always end up playing dress up and with dolls( which I hated) I would much rather go on a fishing trip with my dad like we always do. And like you, I went shirtless till I was 8 or so. I joined a swim team and my favorite part was competing with all the boys, but one of the girls got mad that I was better than a lot of the teens there and she held me under the water for a little while playing sharks and Minos(scariest moment of my life) but with my personality I brushed it off but I wasn’t friends with her anymore. When my period came I hated myself because I was so grossed out with my body and to this day it still makes me so uncomfortable. When I was 14 I would be frustrated non stop all day at everything I just couldn’t stand to look like a girl, have long hair, be called sweetie and girl all day everyday by my family, at the time I hadn’t figured out I was trans. When I turned 15 I started crying myself to sleep because of how I felt and starting cutting, and I started binding with ace bandages( I know I know BAD!!!) I didn’t have a reason to bind it just made me feel good. And I figured out I was trans from a random recommended video of a transgender RU-vidr, Part of me knew I was trans from when I was 13 but I just didn’t want to admit it. I became a very happy person and got my bubbly personality back for a few months just knowing who I was and why I felt those ways. But.. now I’m 16 years old and I’ve gotten depressed because now I have to find a way to come out to my family. I feel disgusted at myself because i wish I could change, I wish I could be a boy. Sorry it’s so long and this video is years old but I just needed to vent 🙁 if your still reading, thank you for being interested in a very very short version of these little moments in my life. If your stiiillllllll reading, do you have any tips on coming out to your mom?
I remember watching the “movie” in 5th grade. The entire 5th grade class watched it altogether, boys in the gym and girls in the cafeteria. I wasn’t entirely sure what I was going to see, but I knew deep down I didn’t belong there. Most of the experience with the girl video, I was in denial because there was no way these things were happening to me. They sounded ridiculous. But then it hit me that they were going to happen to me. Instead of crying, sometimes I laugh when I feel awkward or uncomfortable. My cousin said that apparently I was laughing through most of the video.
I had some similar problems to you, although not quite as masculine. I always hated girls toys, makeup and I was always jealous of my brother for getting all the cool monsters, trucks and building blocks. I remember I carried a Spider-Man doll to pre school instead of a barbie doll and I hated the girls clothes as well, that always got me to hate gender roles. I wanted to wear a cool overall outfit like the boys did, so I asked my mum to get me some clothes like that but instead o the boys, we went to the girls section and got an ugly pink shirt with flowers on it. I used to hang around different genders not just boys or just girls, I felt like there shouldn't be a rule where you hang out with the same gender. I hated the whole puberty thing as well, the whole idea growing breasts and making babies was so overwhelming but I learned to accept that I will get my periods no matter how much I cry out that I'm ace (a sexual). My puberty also taught me that I wasn't attracted to guys, I was more into the idea of having a girlfriend. To this day I always wear a jacket over the top of everything because I'm self conscious. Although, I have also learned that I am feminine as well as masculine, I always fan girl when watching movies, I always feel comfortable when being on the girls side when being sort out by genders, I quite like my name and probably won't change it etc. I could go on and on but i have come to the conclusion, I am not a girl, nor transgender. I am gender fluid
I always felt like the gay guy or brother going to girls night. I've always liked girly things but I hated being referred to as a girl and I was always jealous of the boys too. It would bother me that I was categorized as female despite not feeling that way.
When I was eight I asked my dad to let me do Boy Scouts he said no... When I was 12 I asked if I could wear a suit for a field trip at school, he said no. He also said,"boys wear suits girls wear dresses! You will wear a dress!" When I was 13 I started going to church with my grandpa. This was the conversation we had... Me: can I wear a suit Him: like a pantsuit Me: no... Like a man suit Him: *laughing hysterically Me: so can I....? Him: ....no.... Me: oh ok then Him: grandma will get you a nice dress.
I've always connected with guys the most and I never wanted to grow boobs either. I've always been insecure about my body. I had liked the look of dresses... On other people but I didn't like them on myself. I also never liked the monthly thing and when someone would say it my heart would drop and my anxiety would kick in. When I was about 5/6 I went to Disney with my family my half cousins were girls and they wanted to see the princesses I liked that they were pretty on the animations but I felt like everyone liked them the way I did I never payed attention to the story but how pretty they were but that day at Disney I was told to take a picture with them and I refused they offered ice cream (it was gold to me when I was five) but I burst into tears and I couldn't do it. I hated the girly stores like forever twenty one and all those places so I went to hot topic and Spenser's a lot, where the clothes weren't gender stereotypical. I hated the way I looked in 'girl' swimsuits and I would usually wear clothes over them. I'd come out to my parents but they always make jokes about lgbt people and I'm the only girl by blood on my dads side (my moms family have all passed) and I'm not sure if I should do it, also if I came out I'm not sure if I'd be agender or ftm I'm also panromantic and demisexual which might come off as a lot to my family
when i was really little like 3 or 4 all my stuffed animals were boys. i would sometimes project my emotions through them for example i would say teddy is sad when i was sad. so now it makes sense to me why i made them all boys. then one day someone possibly my mom asked me why none of them were girls so i started to make some of my stuffed animals girls because i didn't want her to think i was weird. when i was still around 3 or 4 i really really wanted to be a boy but i knew that i couldn't. i would have these moments throughout my childhood until now (I'm 14 almost 15 now) where i would think to myself, this is so not me. and this horrible feeling would run through my mind. when i was 10 almost 11 i noticed my body starting to change. immediately i felt like i had to hide my chest. i remember wishing i would get breast cancer so i could get them removed. i didn't understand how other girls were excited about puberty. when i was 13 i got my monthly thing. it was the worst day of my life. before it happened i always thought well at least i don't have a monthly thing yet so I'm still not completely a woman. but then it came and i stayed up all night talking to my mom about it and just crying and crying. to this day i get terrible anxiety and dysphoria whenever it comes. i still haven't come out yet and I've known that I'm trans since i was 11 or 12.
oh and i forgot to add that i was looking through my old family pictures and in like 60% of them I'm shirtless lol. even when i was 8 or 9. my brother always thought it was weird and i never understood why. one of my favorite pictures of me is when i was dressed up as a super hero but it was home made so i was wearing black leggings a white mask no shirt towels tied around my wrists and a big towel as a cape. i looked crazy but looking back i can see how happy i was.
Thanks for sharing all of this dude! I love hearing other people's stories :) All of my stuffed animals were boys too!! And, I relate to all of that dysphoria :/ Stay strong bro!
ever since i could pick out my own clothing i would have my mom buy me boy clothing and i would wear it and think nothing of it. but when i came time for pictures my mom made me wear girl clothing to look nice i hated it. but it wasn't the having to dress up and look nice that made me upset it was what i was wearing. i wanted a suit and tie so bad and we would walk past some all the time. so for the next family picture my mom found a outfit that had a tie. i hated it a little less but it still didn't feel right. i had mostly male friends and did mostly "boy" activity's. when i grew up i found out what a tom boy was and that's what i thought i was. and i would always say i just like boy clothing cause it fits me better and I'm just a tom boy. but many years later i am realizing i lied to myself. all those feelings i had of not wanting to wear feminine clothing and wanting a suit and tie was not because i just liked how bot clothing fit i wanted to be a boy. so now i am 15 and still trying figure out how to know what i am truly feeling. i am a closeted confused but pretty sure trans person. idk what my name is yet i have a fairly boyish name but still not sure if i like it or what. i do wish my name was Wyatt but my aunt and uncle used the name after i was born so that's can't be my name. (also little tip for ftm people that still get their period try period underwear)
Many girls go through this growing up. It’s because society makes girls ashamed of their bodies not because they are trans. We need to change society not our bodies
We had really similar childhoods except I didn't much mind girls clothes at a young age because I was homeschooled and had only sisters so I didn't really know boys and boys clothes existed.
It's almost going to be a whole year since I found out what transgender was. Last summer was the best but worst summer ever because I realized (but was in denial) that I was trans. As a kid I didn't even know what gender roles were but I knew my mom believed in acting like a girl. Which didn't really stop me from being a tomboy anyway LOL. I refused to wear dresses and skirts and only wore sneakers, jeans, and graphic tees. And I always wanted to be friends with the boys. And when I went through my emo phase I wanted to be an emo boy instead of an emo girl and wished I could change just so I could look like an emo boy(weird but true) makes me laugh but makes sense when I think back on it.
I feel you on the emo phase- wanting to be an emo boy rather than an emo girl! In 9th grade, most of my friends thought I was an emo rocker boy when they first saw me in the hallways. They meant it as a joke, but it made me smile :)
Growing up as a kid I hated wearing dresses, make up, or doing my hair in a bun with bows and shit like that. I always liked “boy stuff” and “boy toys”, I pretend to shave, would say I wanted to be a boy constantly, and never wanted boobs. As the years went by I started to be in control of what I could wear because I never thought to wear boy clothes and from there on I dressed more like a boy and would even wear ties to school. However I did want bigger boobs cuz I wanted my crush to like me cuz she was just into that it but always made me uncomfortable to shop for girls lingerie. What was even a bigger warning sign was that I wanted to be called Hunter in 7th grade and I would fantasize about having a dick constantly. As some more years went by I figured out I could be trans because before I’d never take it into consideration until I befriended a guy who had just started testosterone and a was kinda jealous that he was.
I've been questioning my gender for maybe three years now? I identified as agenderflux for a while because sometimes I'd feel more masculine and sometimes I'd feel like nothing at all. Not sure if the latter was because of my gender or my mental state, but it was a thing. Lately though, I've been constantly feeling masculine. The idea of transitioning seems more and more appealing to me, especially since my gender dysphoria has been increasing (haven't been professionally diagnosed with gender dysphoria by the way). I cut my hair short, I bought a binder, I asked some friends to use he/him pronouns for me and it all just feels _right,_ but I'm still scared that I'm wrong about this. I can't stop overthinking and questioning. Especially because I wasn't aware of any of this until I was 14 or 15 (though looking back at my childhood it makes sense, I was raised pretty gender-neutral and even the female friends I had were pretty masculine. It wasn't until college that I was actually treated like a girl and thats when the dysphoria and questions really kicked in) when most transgender people I've heard talking about their experiences already knew in early childhood. I know it's not the case for everyone but it makes the fear that I might be wrong a lot stronger. Sorry for dropping this entire essay on you, haha, I just don't have anyone to talk to about this and writing it out makes me feel a bit more valid ^^"
You are totally valid! Thanks for sharing :) I was very similar to you. It's maddening when you're constantly questioning yourself. What really has helped me, at least accept my gender and figure it out, was seeing a therapist. I'd look for therapists specializing in gender dysphoria in your area :)
I am a ftm 13 year old boy my name is originally Ayla but I go by james or paul. My mother is homibofibic and tramsphobic but i am both transgender and bisexual. I only have 3 friends and one family member who knows and are supportive. None of which are my parents. I wish I was in an excepting family. My mother and father shut me down telling me it was just a phase. It hurts me inside to know mom and dad dont except.💔💔
When I was way younger, I always called myself a tomboy. I always thought that you're forced to be with the gender you were born with. One time when I was like 4, I was hanging out with this girl and I suggested we cut our hair. I ended up cutting my hair boy short but then my mom started freaking out. I was confused because I actually liked short hair. My mom told me girls are supposed to have long hair. That's when I started growing my hair out. To be more like the "other girls". I still called myself a tomboy and hated wearing dresses or earrings. I didn't mind makeup that much because I thought it was just another way of art. Then I visited my cousin around the age of 9. He (he's trans too) told me about lesbians, bisexuals, and gay people. We kept in touch. Because of how I was raised, I thought that was wrong. I grew to realize I'm pansexual. I've honestly never cared about what gender you are. And I learned I liked girls because in kindergarten I kissed a girl and enjoyed it. I started to realize I was trans the summer before middle school. First I thought I was non-binary. This went on for a while but it just didn't feel right. Then I identified as genderfluid. I told people to call me Janey. But then it also didn't feel right. I just never felt like a girl. Then I identified as a trans guy. It felt right. I thought trans guys weren't allowed to like feminine stuff but I saw a post on tumblr that changed everything. I now identify as a trans guy and even my friends noticed how happy I've become after learning that I am male. I'm closeted at moment because of my parents own beliefs and struggle dysphoria a lot because of it. But I'm going to make myself look like a male as soon as I can.
I was born a girl and my name is Mea. When I was a toddler I would go to this place called glitter bugs and there was lots of costumes there. There would be costumes like princesses fairies and stuff which the girls would obviously wear but I would run to the pirate or superhero costumes or fireman costumes etc. Me and my cousin Ella ( this was up to being a toddler up to like 10 years old when we played games ) whilst we payed games she would be a princess and I would be like the dragon or hero. When ever my sis or cousin or friend would say oh let me do your hair! I would say nooo or hey would say do mine but I would say no mostly cuz I didn’t know how to do girl hairstyles cuz I never did my hair I would just keep it down. When I was eight I always begged my mum to cut my hair short. I also would always wear boys clothes and pyjamas. I am twelve now and all my friends talk about there period and I was squirming and they said Mea stop that’s mean! And I said no I’m sorry it just grossed me out that’s all I’m just weird and they all gave me a dirty look so I said sorry again. I hate the thought of me getting a period and growing boobs and hate talking about vaginas YUCK. When I would make insta accounts involving role play I would always be a boy character. I need to come out to my Mum. Then some others. Before at around Christmas time I saw Santa and he gave me a gift of a doll and cuz I got so offended my mum returned it and got me a boys toy. All my toys are in the attic and there’s no girl toys up there. I feel like I am a gay boy.
I was jealous of my nephew, the guys on TV, Always boy characters (still of course), jealous of what the boys did and could do in kindergarten and beyond with everything about them (looks and personality), my crushes winded up liking my boyish side probably cos they said they weren't (lesbian) and one of them for sure winded up telling me she kinda liked me in primary and I was shocked and in denial . she moved away so we couldnt discuss it, (we were kids so idk how that would happen lol). I kind of hated puberty, didnt know in what way tbh. just felt weirded out and thought it was norma but turned out most girls didnt make it such a problem like I did.
I remember how I loved to play crazy games but both girls and guys in my school in primary were very fun and we always made stories and did exploring. with my other nephews, we'd hunt for insects and stuff. It was just fun but I never thought it was gendered. But highschool was a mess... I wanted to play and up til the third year, I tried to have some fun and be comfy with baggy clothes. I tried 'some more feminine' clothes, but as soon as I got it on, didnt take me long or it was off.... I had my hair short from sixteen years old, came to realize it wasnt enough til four years later: I'm a man, not a ffing woman. Never felt degraded as a woman, just restricted somehow.
When I was younger, I was always looking at ways to prove that I actually wasn't a girl. I always felt more masculine, and that if I cut my hair, wore guys clothing, changed my name and showed up to school the next day I could be a man. I always told myself "if I get boobs I'm actually female" and then I got them and I told myself "no, there's no way I'm female if I don't have my period. If I get it I'm definitely female" and then I got it a couple years later and told myself that I was meant to be female because everything was like it was supposed to, and that my feelings didn't really matter if I was "supposed to be female". A few years went by, with wanting to cut my hair again, and feeling weird when people call me she or her, but just ignoring it until now. Recently I learned what transgender was, and thought to myself that maybe I could feel male. I told myself that I was already LGBT (I'm pansexual) and that coming out as trans would not work and I should just keep it to myself. But I started using my name (Carter, which is not my birth name) online and decided I needed to tell someone that I wasn't female, and told a genderqueer friend. I slowly started telling more friends, and they accepted me as who I was. I decided I wanted to look more masculine, so I cut off all my hair and have slowly started dressing and acting more masculine, and that's how I am today. Sorry about this being so long, but I wanted to tell someone :)
when I was younger I was girly but I always remember wanting to be one of the guys and when I was in gr5 we had to watch "the movie" and I just didn't show up cuz I couldn't handle it and only now am I starting to figure that I'm ftm
Dude I'm crying this is so fuckin relatable!! I'm not out yet and I go to the only girls college and I have difficulty making female friends cause I can't relate to them at all and I pretty much stay alone And I wish I was with boys and had guys friends so much! 🤕
I'm crying bc I realized my situation is so much better then it could be. I have friends who helped me realize myself, and stared using he him pronouns without me telling them. One of my guy friend invited me to a party and said its an all boys party. Im so lucky.
Oh God Same thing happened to me when I tried convincing my mom to let me cut my hair last year(10th grade) and honestly I am still trying to convince her so. -_-
basically the same but I'm 13 now and yes my parent have tried to convince me to wear girls clothes but I didn't and my parents let me get my hair short and wait boys clothes. but eventho I can relate to everything in this vid I'm still not sure if I'm trans. I lived my life like a guy kinda but idk
Whenever I was around eight or nine I remember saying to myself I hate everything about being a girl but I don’t wanna be a boy....... I’m 14 now and I’m a trans male
Ok I'm only 11 years old but I haven't told anyone I'm transgender but when I was younger instead of playing with dolls I would play with cars I didn't think anything of it when I was about 7-8 years old I started wearing baggy clothes because I had boobs and I didn't want anyone to see them at the age of 9-10 I started wearing black clothes (I'm not goth) now at the age of 11 I want to dye my hair brown and cut it short. It's so hard keeping a secret because if I don't tell there will be no chance of me being able to be who I want to be
If you feel comfortable telling your parents (only if you will be safe: they won't hurt you or kick you out of the house), then telling them might be a good idea. They might be able to help you with coming out to everyone else. Telling some close friends you really trust might also be helpful.
i remember when i was like 9 or 8 i went camping with my parents and my brother and my brother needed to go pee so he did it in a bucket in the tent and i needed to pee too so i stood up and peed and my mom walked in and made this face she looked so shook LMFAO
Gender and attraction are very complexed issue. My take on that is you should be yourself. If your calling is being transgender, then be it. If your calling is being a woman who loves woman, being that. With that said, it does not mean it is easy to be who you are..Yet we only live once, be true to yourself is best way to live it.
when I was younger I was a tomboy but never really cared as much about my body in particular? Recently I've been considering that I could be transgender but I feel like I'm not valid enough to be transgender idk anymore
I'd do more research and maybe get a gender therapist. That's what helped me! If you realize you ARE trans, then you ARE valid. Even if you like things outside the "gender norms" etc.
I remember my brother telling me when I started saying things, so around 2 years old I would cry,punch and do anything because I have to wear a dress, I was the only girl in my family and I’ve wanted to wear like my older brother, I got my younger brother few months after that incident, I wore my brothers clothing even tho they are big and small😂 I would refuse to wear anything girly but my parents still forced me, as I grew up around 5th grade I wore a lot of boy clothings because I got to wear the clothings that were small for my older brother I really enjoyed it even tho my fashion type was horrible, I loved wearing boy clothings and in 8th grade I got my hair short and I FRICKIN loved it!!! But obviously as the months past ur hair grows😭 I hate my hair so much because it makes me look like a girl and I fuckin hate it...... I am depressed, I selfharm, I have suicidal thoughts everyday...... I came out to everyone in my family of last year of July 7th and they still don’t support me😭 And I’m too scared to come out to school because I’m scared that my parents are going to figure out..... I am NOT a girl I am a B O Y named Elijah (Btw my account says “Fluid kid” because I made this account when I identified my self as gender fluid)
Hey! I hope you're doing okay right now, and that you're still alive to see this. There's always a community out there for you. Sometimes random people can make better family than your real one. You gotta take care of yourself, man. Know that you are valid the way you are, even if other people don't see it right. *internet hugs* You'll always be you, no matter how you present yourself, and that's something I've been trying to accept in myself since I realized I was a boy too. You'll be living your best life soon enough, even if it doesn't seem like it now. I dunno if you're religious or not, but I'll be praying tonight that all of us can find acceptance and love. 🤍
im kinda glad i deal with stomach pain but kinda not but i got to miss all sorst of sex ed or period stuff BECAUSE IM A DUDE NOT A CHICK but now im going into 8th grade but for the first 2 quarters we are gonna be doing it online due to the pandemic so im probaly gonna have to email my pricipal and my teachers but im going to my doctors cus im going to turn 13 soon on august 3rd so im gonna tell my doctor im trans ftm so im gonna write some sort of script to memorize but he will probaly accept me caus he is a really nice doctor but im still nervous so wish me luck
MY FAMILY THINKS I'M TRANSGENDER AND WON'T LET ME BUY ANYTHING REMOTELY GUY-ISH. Anyone know what I can do or say? I still like guy-ish stuff because I'm a tomboy.
My first friend and only friend in preschool was a boy. My best friend right now is a boy and I've known him since kindergarten. I only hung out with guys in 7th and 8th grade. People kept shipping my best friend and I since 5th grade and into 9th grade. I was so pissed that I couldn't have a boy bests friend without dating him. I'm not into guys. People suck ;) #transpride
I like wearing both women and men's clothes since I looked good in both when I was young. It is such a fun thing to try both clothing and looking good in both. I have no particular expectation for breast or no breast. I go with the flow. Either way is good look to me. I am not seeking a male appearance. I am who I am. A woman who loves woman.
Im 10 and im going through all this stuff and my mom, I think she knows I want to be a boy but she hasnt asked me yet but she is starting to buy me more boy stuff , by the way im not on my period and plus I look more like a.boy than a girl , so I guess I just came out to like a thousand people
Before i tell u this I am still a girl and i am 11 now :/ I have wanted to be a boy since i was about 9 and the wanting to be a boy escalated throughout 3rd 4th and 5th grade and now im telling my mom i want to be a boy ssooooo badly and shes all "god made you this way for a reason" i 100% disagree with her tho. I really want your hair and i have curly hair too and your face shape. Every single day at school i look at all of the skinny more fit boys in my school and wish so hard that i was them and i am doing all that i can to look like a boy now so if you have any advice mind telling me? Thanks for this video bro! :)
Hi! Just so you know, being trans is not a choice. Not something you "want." It's something you "are." Something you were born with. If that makes sense haha. If you do happen to be ftm transgender, you indeed would want to be a boy because your mind was born as male - and your body female... Have you Googled other gender identities too? There are things like trans masculine, gender fluid, gender queer, demi boy... It might help to research a little bit :) Do you feel safe telling your parents? You don't want to tell them if you think they will hurt you. But, if you think they would be cool, tell them how you feel. Ask them if they can help you research what it means to be trans. And, ask them to find you a gender therapist. Best of luck!
I'm a gay male and when I was growing up I LOVED dressing up in women's clothes and exploring make up. Loved it! But... NEVER, EVER, EVER did I want to be a 'female' or consider myself trans or anything contrary to what I was...a male. And, yes, I use that gender word male..I have no issue with it. Just because someone wants to explore the 'other side' of sexual identity, doesn't mean that they want to be that forever, or a person's life is so tragic that they have to change their appearance to the other gender. I love being a male...I'm venus with a penis...I have no desire to be female. Everyone is different I suppose, but remember when you are growing up the whole world fascinates you, but it doesn't mean that you need to change everything about yourself, and children are very influenced by their surroundings.
I have friends I tell everything to and I was a normal ordinary girl who wanted boobs once I hit puberty I HATED having boobs around 10 years I cried myself silently to sleep and prayed I didn't want boobs. I am still trying to cornice my mom to get me short haircuts so I can look like a boy and she scolds me and forces me I have to wear bows and I hate it. My mom still doesn't know why I wear my jacket everyday to school it's because I need to hide my body. I've been wearing baggy jackets science 3rd grade and still do. I've been trying to wear simple homemade binders and for the past few days I have felt more comfortable and had my jacket unzipped the whole week. My friend told me she was proud and she told me the other day her mom was going to get her a binder for her birthday I was jealous and didn't talk to her the whole day. I'm just wondering how she came out to her mom and I recently got my phone taken away for talking about sexuality and your binder video is urging me to come out to my mom, I am absolutely terrified of my mom I think it's better till I wait till I go to college to start.
