Two-strike strikeouts, three-ball walks, and other counting failures | Dorktown 

Yeah, uhh... ...I'm going to need a "You're in San Diego and I'm in Hell" sweatshirt in the Secret Base merch shop immediately.

This can be baseball’s version of scorigami. Imagine an account tweeting once a year saying “3 BALL WALK 🚨”

"ohh look this fastball is 77 mph, that's gotta be a record, anyway like i was saying it's 3-2"

I love the Mariners Special cameo. The Dorktown Extended Universe is really stretching it's legs.

The two takeaways from this: 1) baseball announcers literally have no object permanence. 2) umpires refuse to admit when they're wrong, because they're afraid the baseball players will launch a Spartacus-esque uprising.

I completely brainfarted once in middle school baseball and ran to 1st on a passed ball, except that pitch only made the count 3-2. Made it to 1st, sold it like a WWE champion, and the umpire called me safe and kept the game moving. Biggest finesse of my youth sports career.

"You're in San Diego and I'm in hell" sounds like a quote from the Charger's front office to its 8 remaining fans.

“...We don’t need a sweatshirt! You’re in San Diego, and I’m in hell.” Top quality Jon quote there.

Jon Bois having a mini-meltdown is epic.

Stephen Strasburg pitched an immaculate inning that only the radio booth realized was an immaculate inning

A few years ago, I scored a college game in which the umpire issued an apparent three-ball walk. Batter tosses the bat toward the dugout and trots down to first. There were runners on first and second, so both of them move up. But the pitching team's coaching staff questions the count, the umpires convene and they realize the error. Plate ump says, "My mistake, ball three, batter you're still up." Thus, the batter returned to the plate as instructed. But here's the goofy part: the two runners got to stay at second and third. And best yet, their advances officially counted as STOLEN BASES.

Subtitled: "You will never forget the word for 'chyron' ever again."

The best advice I ever got in my career in television was “as long as you walk in like you’re supposed to be there, no one will ask what you’re doing.” I’ve entered so many events and buildings in this way. Never once questioned.

we now know that you can’t make a Dorktown video without making a short amendment to the Mariners video

"There's the Ump, doing his very best Richard Nixon impression" got me so bad 😂😂😂

This is it. This is why I love baseball. By sheer volume of plate appearances, the improbable becomes inevitable.

Why were they even drawing a heart on Logan Foursythe in the first place

21:37 The game actually did have some implications, with regards to the 2012 MLB draft. If the Padres had lost that game, they would've picked at 5 instead of 7. Instead of being tied with the Royals and Cubs, they would have a worse record than both and pick in front of both of them. With the 7th pick, the Padres selected Max Fried, which they might not have if they were 2 spots higher. In that case, Fried might have been selected by a different team and never traded to the Braves, which means a crucial part of that World Series run would've never been on the team, and possibly the World Series would've been much different.

Me, watching this while eating: "Stupid umps. They count to 4 all the time and it's so easy. If something is easy and you do it all the time, how could you possibly make a mistake?" Also me: "Damn, I just bit the inside of my own cheek!"

You can’t fool me. This is just the second epilogue of your Mariners doc

A 3-BALL WALK JUST HAPPENED AT TONIGHT'S MARINERS-ANGELS GAME the mariners finally caught a break even though the announcers noticed it edit: batter was carlos santana and he ended up scoring to put the Ms up 4-2 in the top of the 9th another edit: took advantage of the extra out to make it 5-2 on a groundout with 1 away

I’m convinced this is the greatest series on RU-vid

Secret Base: **Uploads a new baseball video** Seattle Mariners: "Ah shit, here we go again."

One trick is to have plate appearances that don't go anywhere. Like the time I walked on only 3 balls. I needed to get on base, so I decided to go to closest base, which is what they called first base in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to get a bat costs a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on them. "Give me five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now, where were we? Oh, yeah. The important this was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have white onions because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big, yellow ones.

Because of dorktown I now want a child called bob that plays for the Mariners and I’m gonna bet him 50 bucks that he can do this in a game.

I'm just here for the day we get the holy grail: The One Pitch Strikeout

9:19 Loving the "Mariners' estimated win probability" chart that just there and is never acknowledged.

It’s always a good day when they upload before Sunday

Yordan Alvarez has just achieved a four-strike strikeout

I love how every time Jon says “Long-time viewers may remember...” I know exactly what he’s talking about.

Jon Bois the man that can turn boring into electric with a touch of jazz

"You're in San Diego and I'm in Hell" is a fantastic quote

I present this video as evidence: you can make content on any topic and as long as it is presented well enough people will watch/listen. Also, I wouldn’t be surprised if SB pulled a fast one on us to show how easy it is to get away with an undeserved WALK on three balls

I mean, of COURSE it's the Mariners who gets hit with two 3-ball walks in a week. Why am I even surprised?

So what I'm getting from this video is that lots of guys get bored and mess up sometimes, but also that Chris Stewart, specifically, probably just can't count.

OOH! A Jon Bois Saturday special is on the menu boys

I'm glad that this channel has helped the world know what I have known for 24 years as a lifelong Mariners Fan. We're a meme. We're the universe's dumping ground for chaos and confusion.

Even the guy runnin the scoreboard says he was out, and he’s way up in the mezzanine!!!

So, I want to mention cricket for a minute.. Bear with me. In cricket we have a division of time called an "over". An over is 6 legal balls (pitches). Overs (along with clocks) are then used to measure time in the game. eg. length of a game, innings, or time played between breaks, etc. There are 2 umpires on the field in cricket and both are counting. To aide this they use a simple counter. The typical design is an oval shaped piece of plastic that has 4 wheels that display 3 different things. At the top is a wheel with the numbers 0-6 on it for counting balls (pitches) in an over. There is a wheel on each side numbered 0-9 for counting total number of overs. Lastly there's a wheel at the bottom numbers 0-9 for counting the outs (there's 10 outs in an innings of cricket). These wheels require deliberate effort to move, make an audible click, and lock into place, requiring another deliberate effort to move again. Standard practice is that after 4 balls (pitches), the umpires look to each other and show 2 fingers to indicate 2 balls (pitches) remaining and confirm they're both at the same number. With all of this, we still get it wrong all the time. Apparently counting is hard.

"Just act like you're supposed to be there. Act like you're doing what you're supposed to be doing. It works. I would know." Cool to know Jon Bois steals hotel breakfasts just like me!

Carlos Santana just got a 3-ball walk against Aaron Loup in the top of the 9th inning, Mariners at Angels, August 15th 2022

I nearly cried when the Mariners chart showed up. Look Jon, it's summer in San Diego, everyone is just killing time between the zoo and In-N-Out.

"Just act like you're supposed to be there. It works. I would know." Jon. Dude. You're one of the greatest storytellers working today. Don't sell yourself short.

I will always appreciate Jon Bois for bringing the Mariners into the light.

Anyone else come back to this video after Yordan Alvarez got away with a 4-strike groundout against the Red Sox?

I just had a HS baseball game last night, there was a terrible umpire who really didn't know what to do. our team just kept walking to first after ball 3, and it works twice before the other coaches began to notice what we were up to. it was hilarious.

We now have a 3 strike non-strikeout to add to the list!

May I take a moment to say how much I love the work that goes into this and all Dorktown videos . I have literally zero interest in baseball, yet I have watched them all many times.

The Chiron on the Padres/Giants actually reset because it’s controller was so confused. The batter flew out with Chiron stating 0-1

I never realize how much I miss this series until I see a new episode posted. And now I'm fully invested in seeing Jon and Alex pointing out other people's mistakes.

Hey, even super bowl MVPs struggle to count to 4 sometimes.

I work on college sports broadcasts and "put up the pitch speed to hide that we're skipping 2" moments happen in every single game

Imaging watching every game that you choose to watch with a lazer focus, now imaging seeing something like this... you might be the only one who noticed, and yeah you could tweat about or make a rant about it on youtube. But do you really want to? Wouldnt you prefer to save the memory and keep it secret? Maybe dm the guy who did the thing and say "hey i know". That moment in baseball is now yours and yours alone as a fan. And I fucking love that.

Funny enough that old man with his wife at the Marlins game (22:47) is a life long season ticket holder and has been to almost every game in idk how many years. I know this because I’ve been to many Marlins games and they always put him on the big screen. He’s also on every kiss cam they do. All of this to say that he might notice a wrong count lol. Thanks for another great video!

As a kid, one time the batter after me had a one pitch walk. The last ball to me was a wildpitch with a play at the plate and some commotion ensued. The ump forgot to update his clicker in all that so when the first pitch to the next batter was a ball, the umpire's clicker said ball four and he sent the runner on his way. I know some people noticed but my team werent saying anything and the other team was too confused and didnt say anything until it was to late.

Alex: “I hope the Yankees go 0-162 every year.” Me, a Mets fan: 😍

The Cameron maybin one is the one I always remembered. I’m not even a Mariners fan and that one made me so mad

This reminds me of that Rangers/Padres game on June 18, 2012 where the Rangers' announcer proclaimed the go ahead run was at fifth on a botched robbery. Dude wasn't having a stroke, he was just following the scoreboard.

I love secret base but theres a certain feeling I get when I see a thumbnail that has a blue background and some weird graphics. It’s indescribable

Whenever SB mentions the never ending plight of my Mariners, the vein in my temple twitches ever so slightly.

The last line of the video is making me think Jon’s hiding something

I can already tell I'll watch this video at least six times

You're bang on with the "other sports get it wrong too..." thing. 1995-96 Australian cricket season, one day match, Queensland vs South Australia. Umpire Parker allows an over of 11 legal balls (a wicket on the 5th ball was followed by a drinks break, and he restarted from zero...) This is in a sport where 6 legal deliveries from one end constitute an over, and the bowling must then change to the other end. A miscount of 1 either way is not unusual; a miscount of 5 is, as far as I am aware, unique.

I think one of the big reasons most have happened in the past Decade is that now most people have the ability to pause and rewind live TV. It used to be that if you thought they got something wrong you just had to accept that you're wrong but now you can rewind and check for yourself

Who else is back here after the 3 pitch not strike out by Yordan Alvarez

I wish there had been at least once where the only person who noticed was one announcer, going “wait, was that not ball 4?”

I could listen to these two talk about anything for hours... how you managed to keep my undivided attention about counting to 4 for nearly a half-hour... you have a gift.

I love that Dorktown is growing. Pretty soon it’s gonna be Dorkcity.

4, never heard of her.

The thing about a 2-strike strikeout is that you really only need to count to 2, not 3. As long as you can count to 2, you will realize that after the last pitch, there were 2 strikes. You might not know too much about 3, but you know it's not 2, so the batter shouldn't be out yet. It's literally the dumbest possible counting error, since you don't exactly "count" to 1.

Ancient Vin Scully didn't miss a trick a few years ago in an Astros-Dodgers game. The batter worked the count to 4-2 but stayed in the box to hit. "Here comes the 4-2 pitch", cracked Scully, and it was fouled off. Another three pitches were fouled off until the batter popped out. This was sometime during the 100-loss years for Houston (2011-2013) and tells you why they lost over 100 games.

dorktown and baseball bits on the same day within a few minutes of each other? this might be the best day ever

very glad this is still a series

"This guy's off in his own universe, and good for him"

Given that ending line, I like to imagine Jon rocked up at SB in a suit and just sat down at a desk next to Alex and said "so how you going with that multi part video about the history of professional fighting?" and everyone was too confused and intimidated by Jon's terrifying presence that they went with it

On Jomboy they made their version of back alley baseball: no running, just hit and throw, one inning a piece. 4 games in, they already lost count of an at-bat. It's endemic, whenever baseball is invented, people forget how to count.

Need a sequel to “The Browns Live in Hell” now that they made the playoffs!

"We made an intern watch every at-bat in Major League history."

Also the music is always spectacular in these videos. I'm eternally grateful you put a list of tracks at the end

I love that Dorktown just goes back to the Mariners all the time. Appreciate it guys

“I never realized how boring this game is” -sober Homer Simpson

although an outlandish scenario, we may one day see an 8 pitch immaculate inning due to a 2 pitch strikeout

the music for this series is like home for me. Thank you so much for keeping this going. It's amazing and I love you.

Incredible as always sb

Oh gosh a new Dorktown AND a new Baseball Bits on the same day? How are we so lucky?

"How hard is it to count to four?" Neither of you know too many drummers, do you? :P

Saw the upload and got really excited

The colorado 5th down was especially interesting because the distraction was most likely caused by a fan having a fatal heart attack behind the buffs’ bench

Foolish and Bois at the same time? Let’s go?

I love that this happened to the Mariners twice in a week

"Act like you're supposed to be there and do what you're supposed to be doing. It works, I would know. " That line is too perfect

I dont know if this was intentional, but I love that the information from the other Dorktown episodes is kept there with all the new information, like each episode adds more little "houses" or "buildings" which is what the information boxes are, truly creating a "Dorktown". If so, super neat concept!

New update: Gio Urshela with a 3-ball walk last night against the Tigers. Another update: Yordan Alvarez with a 3-strike non-strikeout.

"I hope the Yankees go 0-162 every single season. But how're you gonna let this 2 strike soul just walk away without even trying to get his attention?" Love this channel

17:33 something even crazier happened in 1972 in California Angels versus Detroit tigers. At the end of the game, with one out left to go in a no-hitter by Nolan ryan. Norm cash, a former batting champion, was the last man up. He took a leg off of a clubhouse table and used it as a bat in the final play appearance he had that night. He essentially gave up the at bat as a strikeout before he even took it, because Nolan Ryan stuff that night was so damn good.

these videos are so relaxing to watch

Fans: 👀 Players: 😰 Umps: 😴 Padres announcers: ❤️

Collapse: how AC Milan fell off as a top tier club in Europe after winning the champions league

i havent really been in to sports since i was in high school. but your channel is awesome. i like hearing about the math and statistics you guys point out as well as the oddball rules. keep up the great work.

I like to imagine that at some point in history this happened and the batter looked back to the ump to tell him he’s got it wrong, only for the catcher to say “nah he’s full of it” and the ump siding with the catcher.