Waiting until marriage was a STRUGGLE | Matt & Abby 

I agree with y’all! Another great thing about waiting is you know that person you are dating isn’t just here for the intimacy, they want you, not just what they can get from you. It definitely shows people’s true colors.

My hubby and I waited! I highly recommend 😊 Zero regrets, we are so stable and our marriage has been a dream. Our relationship is really different from other’s relationships around us who didn’t wait, so waiting has proven to be so beneficial and truly a blessing.

I waited till my wedding night. My husband knew I was a virgin and was totally supportive. I think all we did before marriage was kiss…a lot.

I’m waiting for marriage and I want a man who is as well. I’m willing to wait for the man God has for me as long as God wants.

My husband and I waited also. It was very tough the last couple months before the wedding. By the grace of God we were able to stay pure. God is so good and marriage is a tremendous blessing.

We waited fully before marriage. I kissed my husband but nothing else. Not even touching anywhere but shoulders and back. Completely waited because that’s what I believe from scripture that God created it for marriage only. 😊❤

My bride and I dated for 2 years no sex; we only did peck kisses and held hands. No making out or nothing. No alone time. And it was SO HARD (literally). The wedding night was AMAZING because we waited.

I will be waiting until marriage, and I really admire others who do that because it really does make the marriage more special and it shows the true commitment of the couple.

I personally am soo glad I never waited for marriage. But that being said I really admire the self control and dedication it takes and I'm happy for you guys that you did that and were happy.

I didn’t wait, did things with people I didn’t end up marrying and regretted it. My now husband and I did wait, we didn’t even kiss till a week or so before the wedding (just to practice, I felt it would be awkward to have our first kiss is in front of everyone 😆). We just celebrated our 10 year anniversary and I really appreciate the sense of safety and permanence that comes from being married to a good man who keeps himself for me ❤

Thanks Matt and Abby for your story, an inspiration to the young to have boundaries and wait til marriage though it's a struggle.

Honestly I feel it's not as hard if you set up hard boundaries on what's not allowed and if your familes are heavily involved. Me and my girl are going on our second year and we're waiting until marriage too. It hasn't been that hard since we don't spend alone time in secluded areas and the farthest we set to go is kissing. We had a sit down and talk about what the boundaries would be pretty early into the relationship, so that definitely helped.

I am an orthodox Jew and we wait till marriage. However, we don't even touch or spend time alone in a secluded area until we are married because it's too easy and very natural to "mess up" even when you want to wait. We also have super short engagement periods and don't see each other a ton once engaged for the same reason. It is so hard though and I can't believe you guy's were able to wait even while touching- thats got to make it so much harder! For us, the not touching takes away some of the unavoidable sexual tension so it makes it easier in that sense but still so hard! My husband and I dated for 6 weeks and were engaged for 2 months. It sounds crazy short but we're just super focused when dating (making sure we're on the same page with values, goals, ect, know that we're both dating for marriage...) our communies tend to have above average successful, happy marriages and much lower divorce rates so it seems to be working :) Definitely waiting for the right person is in the best interest of both people. I don't know any married person who is like "yeah, I really wish I messed around more with other partners before getting married..."

I think I’m gonna wait till marriage I’ve always thought of my first time as a very special thing

We did everything before we got married and ended up getting pregnant about 2 years into our relationship. We got married at that point and just celebrated our 47th anniversary on May 30, 2023. We still act like newlyweds and still love each other to this day. Because we had a "shot gun" wedding we didn't have a honeymoon at all but I am hoping we can have the honeymoon on our 50th anniversary just three years from now. He was 19 and i was 16 when we married, we were 17 and 14 when we met and started dating.

Had 2 kids and been with my partner 11 years before we got married 😂😂. Met him at 17 moved in with him at 17. Waited 6 years before our first child. Been together 20 years this year and married for 9.

It’s always fascinated me that people wait until marriage. I have so many questions lol

The stories I hear from my grandparents, parents, and in-laws! My husband and I moved at a glacial pace in comparison, and my own parents immediately moved from the US to Japan after they got married; talk about big life changes! I think the secret sauce is really more about waiting until it has meaning, being able to be fully present, and an honest expression. For some that’s a moment that naturally comes up within a relationship, and for some it’s a moment reserved for after marriage.

“It’s freaking hard as freak” -Matt 2023

Love this! Funny to listen to you guys. Thank you for speaking out in support of waiting until marriage!

3:00 bless your heart. The lack of experience really shows in this clip

I cannot see how waiting until marriage makes any difference to how devoted or in love a couple is. Our eldest daughters have children (all planned) with their partners and are extremely happy and devoted, we couldn’t be happier for them. If they decide to get married one day we’ll also be very happy for them, but it will make zero difference to how they feel about each other. They’ve already made a huge commitment by having children together.

We waited until marriage, and it was very difficult. We have been married 23 years.

I did wait till marriage. They ended up not being good to me . I don’t regret waiting bc in the end I did the right thing but I wish the person I waited for was different. I’m now re married to someone else

I was going to save it for marriage, until I met someone and we were together (on and off but still) a few years before trying that and he didn’t manipulate me or pressure me either. Eventually I told him I was interested in going further than what we did before, and even everything before that I didn’t do right away either. Basically, I think I’ve found someone who is interested in me as a person cause he was totally cool waiting for me.

Lol, “Oh, it felt different.”😂 Yep, if you waited until your wedding night, it sure does!😘🤭

I will not touch them before I get married. Personal choices

Abby is glowing😍😍

Honestly being married before sex was something I'm proud of. But having met so many other couples, its really just up to the both of you!

Purity Culture doesn't do anything - no hugging, no hand holding, no nothing. Those things are just normal intimacy and are important in a relationship. Waiting until wedding night for intercourse is another matter. It's difficult and takes alot of discipline. I couldn't do it though

My husband and I waited until marriage. I think it was harder for me then for him because I was married before, and have had sex before. It was ROUGH. We had a short dating period/engagement lol

Here in New Zealand its not a big deal having casual sex. Its entirely up to the individuals and we encourage our young people to talk about it first and go into it educated. Im 49yr with two grown up children and their dad and i have never married but still have a loving relationship. I dont need religion or society to pressure me into a way of living that i dont want or need. Each to their own.

Regarding the "you don't buy the cow if you can get the milk for free"-comparison: if someone just wants sex (the milk), they should not be the one you marry anyway. The goal is to find someone who "drinks the milk and still buys the cow" in my opinion (though I find that comparison a bit disturbing tbh.)😅

Is anybody else waiting till marriage for non-religious reasons? I am and it's soo hard to find others w the same values

No, seriously. Before the act, you just make out for hours and it’s so hard to get back to that after finally doing the act- whether it’s the same person or not- bc you make out for hours bc you can’t do the act and once you’ve done it, it’s much easier to give in to the temptation and just rip off the bandaid than let it build bc there’s no more like… fear of the “what if.” It would def take a lot of discipline to not do it when making out for hours

I think waiting or not waiting are valid choices. But the whole “cow” saying is ridiculous. You choose to stay with someone and marry them because you love them, you like their company, admire them, you have common goals and so on, not to just finally gain “access” to their body to have sex with. Reducing anyone to a a cow that gives/doesn’t give milk -> person that gives/ doesn’t give you sexual pleasure is not it.

Kissed for the first time at the alter. And got pregnant wedding night after our first time doing it.

60s here i never cared about marriage , therefore free to live how I choose.. This married life was never for me.

For the single ladies out there, stay firm to your own values. My husband told me that he's grateful that we waited until we're married and we didn't even date like other people do.. Some of his friends who do things prior to marriage have complained to him that the spark is gone months after marriage as they've done 'everything ' before the wedding. so I'm glad that we stick to our Islamic values. Now 11 years ,we're still going strong with 3 kids. 😊

America is for sure one crazy country

I'm so glad to have found this video. Love your channel by the way. So, me and my fiance were childhood sweethearts, but things got difficult and we grew apart, met other people, did "it' with others; didnt have faith or religion back then. It made us both feel.. not great. I rediscovered God (was raised by a hardcore atheist father and a devout Catholic mother, so navigating that confused me and made me turn away from God/not really understand the whole concept, we went to church on Sunday, and I was taught to pray every night, wasn't encouraged to read or study the Bible. Fiance was raised Amish as a boy, until he got a little older and his parents left the community. So that was a lot for him. Lost faith, and so we both lived worldly lives for 30+ years.) Fast forward, I rediscovered (reallt discovered for the first time) Christianity and God, by studying Physics. I feel that if you intensely study the sciences with an eye for only the most factual, irrefutable points, it inevitably leads to proof of a Creator. The top 1% of physicists usually end up turning towards God by the end of their careers and/or lives. Started reading the Bible, and encouraged my fiance (and father of my two children! We had one child together, and one from his previous relationship; we wanted to get married before the baby was born, but it was exactly when Covid hit and no one would or could marry us to do it in the "right" order) to get into Physics too, and it lead him also to convert to Christianity and a life of faith in God. I know we can't put the cat back in the bag, but we have been waiting till marriage for months. It's as a sign of respect for the Lord, and a symbol of our love for God and respect for each other, too. Hardest thing ever! We had no idea! It's brought us even closer together though, and we've learned how to be physical and loving to each other without being sexual or having that intent. It's actually been really beautiful and intimate and sweet. Having said that, we are now 12 days away and officially losing it but hanging in there! Lots of jokes and memes and making fun of each other. He really is my best friend.

Me and my husband did not wait till we got married 🤪 we are going on 6 years and our marriage is locked in

Love you guys ❤❤

Used to be private AND SACRED used to be sad

But Sexual in/compatibility is a real thing 🤔

it was really hard to wait til marriage and I wound up just giving in to it. tbh I didn't feel guilty. it was surprising that I didn't feel that way

So hard to stay pure! What kept you from doing it, in the moment when you were feeling all rhetorical heat and all the feels? I too am pure, and need all the advice I can get on how you overcame temptation in the moment

Question is : why?

we're waiting till marriage too!

Is a long story but the run down is me and my now wife where togueter for 4 years then we split up and fmgot back togueter almost 10 years later I was more in compromise with my faith and had taken a vote of chastity and boy let me tell you those 2 years we dated without having sex it was insane and after living thru that I feel there's nothing we Can't go thru together as long as we stay close to God.

I dont understand this but you do you

Dated for for two got engaged after two moves in together and then two years married . Sex came about four months later

U guys got married at 20 not that hard to be fair

I don’t get the point after engagement. Once you know it’s an extremely committed relationship what’s the difference?

Home run 6-months in, been married 4 years and together 12 ❤️

Cow and milk seriously!!

Matt is right. When people said “I wait until married”, ok I get it but, how far did you went before you married? Because, I think, people forget there are plenty ways of having sex without penetration. Seriously you wait all that time only kissing or even not kissing at all? Wow should be hard!

Solution, don’t wait 10 years to get married

Stupid to wait

Soo as a 21 year old man from India and I, am in the 1% According to Matt, and yea that might have some truth to it but I know many people like me from Saudi, India, Qatar too but I guess we're rare these days. And if am living in the west 🥴. Masha'allah Allah decided to put me to a poor family from India, and now we're an upper middle class I think , soo masha'allah 🤲. Like people from my parents time were only doing the deed after marriage but this generation is fkd soo I'll teach my kids something soo they won't have time to think about it,

My first time was at 14💀

You guys please reply. You said you waited three years. You guys got married age 20/21 and that would make it 7 years, no? Did you guys do it the first four? Also, you guys were each other's only romantical relationship but did you guys have had sex with anyone else?

Yeah, no.... Definitely did not wait. Glad we didn't. 😂🤷‍♀️ But that's cute how you guys did that. I respect that. 😁💜

Abby seems to have a better clarity on keeping intimacy for marriage. The struggle this couple seem to be grappling with is the fact that they are not born again Christians because that gives clear instructions from the Bible that sex outside of marriage is wrong but when you wait, like Matt said you are demonstrating self control And Matt said you don’t live with regrets but ultimately you are obeying God’s word which the Bible says sex out of marriage is fornication when you don’t have a biblical standard to build your marriage on then you fumble with what is right or wrong this does not give clarity to those who are Looking for answers or direction about appropriate behaviour while dating. Look to the Bible God created marriage and he created sex. His word will protect you and guide you in choosing a healthy spouse and building a lasting marriage.

I think that there is nothing to "admire" about people who wait until marriage. Some do it, some don't, do whatever _you_ feel comfortable with and do not let this depend on what other people tell or show you but solely on how you feel. I will say though that I think that in most cases it is not very sensible to wait until marriage to do intimate stuff (all from kissing to sex) because it is such an important and also sensitive topic. You definitely should have tried if your relationship works in this aspect and if you can trust each other and want the same things in this aspect before you tie youself to a person forever.

This podcast is really toxic

This can work only if you marry at 20, if you marry at 30 or older I think its quite controversial and unhealthy too

People wait until marriage to sleep together?!?! That’s so old fashioned! Very wholesome though. I probably should’ve made my husband wait too…I’m sure he would’ve proposed a lot sooner. 😅

Ha! My husband & I moved in together after 2 weeks. We married two years later. Been married 24 years.

Some people aren’t sexually compatible 🤷🏼‍♂️ waiting can waste all that time when you could not be compatible.

Are they believers

Making out is the best. Do it regularly

you both were making out when you weren't even dating?? sorry but what does it even mean? 😂 And in my opinion, I don't think waiting till the marriage is necessary. Because if both are mature and willing to do it, then there's nothing wrong with it. And the funny thing is, you guys didn't wait till marriage, but you guys got married because you couldn't wait, you weren't even earning well or having any career.

I find it super to wait. Are you Christians?

Are they mormon?

Youll get bored

😂min 4:00

Do people still wait before mariage ? Like, it's still a thing ?😂

I lost my virginity at 16 to a 20 yr old and it was crooked so it hurt it was in the front seat of a Nissan and ugh not fun dated fir a while till I was 17 or 18 I met 2 serious boyfriend we did have six he was a few yrs older but really great guy we lived with his parents for a while his x was prego with his baby and it just got weird like his mom had our homecoming pictures on the wall and theirs like wtf I just couldn't found out he was cheating with her before I left . But I do think it helps to live with someone before you get married and date or be engaged for a few yrs to make sure it's gonna work

I think people should live together before Marriage, and have sex before marriage. It is 2023.

😛😛😛

Never met a women who has never been married that is a virgin

are you guys have Jesus too you just pray. ..........

JESUS loves you!!! Pray to end abortion!!!

This is the most toxic podcast ever Stop living

I think he might be gay. Just sayin. 😂

My husband and I waited until marriage but it was hard at times. We prayed together a lot, and when things got too heated, we separated for a minute or two to catch our breath and remember why it was so important that we waited. I'm really glad that we did because it made our first time that much sweeter.🩷