Marriage is just a contract that exposes your assets and it all get taken away because woman have that privilege for the divorce option. Basicaly marriage is just a quick cash grab for woman and I’m only 14 years old and im starting to see what the world is like.
If you live in the United States just got a girlfriend but tell her you're not planning on getting married if you don't live in United States look that your country's rules cuz some countries like Canada consider if you live with a girl long enough like 6 months is considered a common-law marriage even though you never actually got married what is considered a common-law marriage and you have to pay her money
Yo bro just a quick question. I’m hearing wat ur saying right but like where tf should I even go to get married so I can prevent the risks of getting fucked over 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
+jazminelovenicki I don't thin that's necessarily true, just like I don't necessarily think spousal support is needed in every case. But if you're a stay at home mom and you have no job or no income are you saying its ok that she figure out what to do with 1+ kids that she had with her husband straight out the gate? Especially if THEY were wealthy? I think spousal support should come in hand only to get the women on her feet so that she can adjust to a new life with her children. Unfortunately some women take full advantage which is wrong but It has nothing to do with living off a man IN EVERY CASE.. I hope this finds you well.
jazminelovenicki thats not the same ! thing.... if ppl arent married or havent been idk y they comment n engage n these conversations.. because they dnt no anything.. u gotta live something to actually no what ull do , n how it goes. because its easy to say things when u havent been there yet..
@Dave , and your reply was the most 7th grade thing to say. Who was talking to you? Oh, that's right, no one lmao but keep @ing me. It makes you look so much "better".
as if emotionally abusive marriages don't exist. as if you don't try to hold out hope if you've been with someone for 10+ years. if you've ever been in a relationship for like 2 years and you don't feel fulfilled in it, im sure you took AT LEAST a month contemplating whether y'all should break it off. imagine being MARRIED to someone for 10+ years, especially if you're not financially independent..leaving isn't as easy as you want to put it.
I think Loni and Tamera are offering realistic insight here. Even though I'm kind of iffy on the whole spousal support issue, I think it's necessary for stay-at-home moms and dads, who have devoted their lives to taking care of their families, to have some kind of reimbursement. I am not saying they should have total support, but a decent amount of support would be nice.
+Empressive i doubt they would agree if antonio was the stay at home dad and he was talking money away from melanie. women want equality when it benefits them
+Empressive reimbursement for what? They decided to say home and take care of their family knowing fully well that they won't be making money. They took a gamble and it didn't work out. Now someone else has to work daily to take care of someone they're not even married to anymore? It literally makes no sense.
+MJ Rod Hence why I said some support, not TOTAL support. Imagine going from financial stability to being broke. With some support, they should be able to make an easier transition and find a job (or go back to school to pursue a career). I've actually witnessed this happen to someone I know, so I understand what the spouses go through when they're left to hang out to dry.
They all got this energy, but when Adele's situation came round, people are talking about "what did he do to deserve it", "it's not fair", all kinds of stuff
@@davidallen6170 you're assuming all men make more than women, or that men are the main providers. It's definitely not true nowadays. But, regardless alimony is awarded to the person who makes less and still women DONT need men to marry them.
@@nancy4207 who created this app you're using to discredit males regarding earning status?, a male. Also, 57% of women 20 and up are employed are less likely to regain work after the pandemic vs 71% of males 20 and up, in the US alone, women need to stop talking out of emotion. Understand, You don't run anything here except a fragile man.
@@JVASZE oh someone got upset over me saying the TRUTH. Just say it's small and no one wants to be with you. It's OK, you can go pay for someone to talk to you.
"She's used to living a certain lifestyle." So is he. What the hell does that have to do with anything? Basically, she's getting paid for sleeping with him.
Yet they say men to Accustomed to privalege . While winning about 80cents.. that doesn't affect standards of living . While New Jersey Ended life alimony and Rated Number1 in ending Chronic Homelessnes. Show really is to blame .and sure ain't the Billionaires
you are all disgusting. as if stay-at-home mothers don't put in equally, if not more, hard work as the full-time employed man to take care of the kids. he prob recommended to her that she stays at home & now she has a huge gap in her resume bc of those 18yrs she spent holding down the household. she's getting paid for that. and the same goes for stay-at-home fathers. but y'all wouldn't say that household husbands are just transactional sex objects tho right?
soulsocietyprincess 🤔is that a, I think it is! Another comment that won’t change anyone’s mind. If you really cared, you would try to change their mind and calling them disgusting is the worst way to do that.
Shaka Kufu Not every contemporary 20-65 yr old man lives in post-“modern” industrialized ‘Western’ countries tbh. Although ‘Western’ styled leftist feminism and all this other bullshit has been spreading to various other non-“Western White” countries and/or regions unfortunately. Mexico, other Latin American countries, the Korean Peninsula, India, Nigeria, former Soviet bloc states, et al....all have little cliques of “woke feminists” causing a ruckus now.
so they must be happy that the singer ADELE is paying huge spousal support as well giving close to 100 million to her ex-husband. I wish they talk about that
$65,000 a month is no joke. The black women response didn't even make sense. "He made a bunch of money from a movie before so he should pay...because he just should"
I won't blame all these people here blabbing. As a woman I have always sort for my own source of income. I think if most women out there realize that they could just make money on their own without depending on any man then we could gain some self respect at least.
I do not think it is wrong to expect some token from broken marriage. I mean at some point in the marriage income were spent so I do not think its wrong to seek support.
@@williamsandrew9521 Everyone is entitled to their various opinion but I would say getting yourself a source of income after such incidence could be really helpful and it also protects your self worth.
@@johnnorbert2408 Absolutely. I agree firmly to this . I kicked off an investment in index funds by the help of this financial expert, Mrs. Trish Tyler just after my ex husband and I got divorced. I was left with nothing from the marriage. This is unfair but it made me understand the merits of independency. So far I have made good profits from this investments and I have been able to take care of my kids and myself.
@@catiamatias6290 I love your courage. Funny how these men think so low of us. I learnt about this index funds and how profitable it can be especially the btc and eth. I also follow the news and I see millions of people make profits from it. I want to invest some money into this index funds but I do not know of a reliable licensed trader . With your experience in the market I would appreciate if you can recommend one to me.
@@ryanjones9498 soo you're saying that women need to be independent & not receive a man's money, right? but i bet u think that women should also take care of the children & the household? men are ashamed when we're the breadwinner & encourage us to stay at home but as soon as we do, they're also not satisfied when we use their $$ and then we're called gold-diggers. women are expected to be everything in a bag of chips but men can just get away with being a deadbeat dad as long as they provide for the family..but that's not considered "sponging" off of women tho right? smh
So Melanie needs to be paid for putting up with Antonio? Who's paying him for the years he put up with her drug problem? I wonder what Loni would say if the tables were turned and the man had to get spousal support.
I agree with that. There should be a flat rate he gives her. I'm sure she had access to his bank account and was making withdrawals to main the life she had "become accustomed to". Give her $5-10 million and call it a day. It's not as if she doesn't have a name in Hollywood and can't get gigs.
Exactly, and Loni is being biased just because she knows her....but who's to say he didn't cheat because her ass was on drugs....we don't know because we weren't there and I hate that Loni would even agree with something sooo ridiculous and she's the oldest one at the table! Smh booooooo on that one Loni....
4:30 the amount of entitlement What happens to the guy that loses his house. HUH? The house he worked for. The house he put in 40+ hour weeks for. Sorry, but that's just dumb. Dudes literally commit suicide after divorces, because of how HARD, they got DRAGGED through THE COALS.
Have your own money. If you are mentally and physically capable of going to work, GO GET A JOB! Yes, people want a happily ever after but the truth is, LIFE HAPPENS. Always have your own. There's nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom, but you better start a RU-vid channel or blog and start making some coins for yourself.
unless your a man u won't know what it is raising your kids. u will only know how good it feel to have your cloths washed cleaning and put up. n having hot meals when u get home. if u get a wife that works and does everything around the house W out paying anyone to help her n has everything perfect good luck
+lifewithmysupermann No. I'm a woman. I believe it's still important to have your own. Blogging and Vlogging were just examples of jobs women can do from the comfort of their home with children. A lot of women stay with men because they don't have the money to leave. Plus if anything goes wrong with his job and/or he can't work, there's another income. As much as we'd like to depend on someone, people are human and naturally disappoint others. Having your own income is important to independence in my opinion.
You need to be able to take care of yourself as an adult, period. What if your ex goes bankrupt or dies or whatever and can no longer take care of you, do all your responsibilities disappear? No. So you need to be able to take care of yourself and your responsibilities with or without another person
Exactly! If you're gonna call yourself a strong independent person then you shouldn't be a dependent. That's what alimony is. Alimony is what makes marriage a dirty world. To me if you want to be with me then you're with me. Don't leave me and then expect me to still take care of you. To me it's just childish. And the idea with the kids part? Do they want brownie points to raise your kids? Should the father get brownie points for paying child support? No! They're your kids and they're your responsibility.
If I wanted my partner to work less to be more available around my schedule, I'd tell her to still work part time and save the money from that job in her own separate untouchable account for in case I disappear. Also in divorce court, I'd point out the account and say since she has that, I should not have to pay as much or any alimony.
That's when women go on welfare. The truth is that women have been taught since the beginning of time from the women in their lives to depend on others... Chris rock jokes that when a woman tells her female friends she's seeing a new guy the first question they ask is what does he do? As if a mans job equates to how good that man is.
0:42 - She had to "put up with him" for 18 years. Yes, being married to a movie star and living a life of luxury in S. Cali.......... The horror of it all!!!
They always make it seem as if they didn't have personal assistants, maids, nannies, cooks, personal trainers, butlers, security, etc. Those bitches probably spent most of their time at the nail/hair salon, spa, starbucks, expenive restaurants, and on vacation every chance they got. All the while receiving receiving vip access to literally everything. These women are not in touch with reality and this is all a mind game/hustle for them.
These are some strong feminists preaching equality.... if those two are equal, why is one of them paying the other one every month? That doesn’t sound very equal
These women have tons of money for speaking about "woman issues". They aren't helping any feminist movement they are just selling their show for views.
I hate the phrase, 'I've become accustomed to a certain type of life." That lifestyle was possible because of the marriage, a person shouldn't be able to continue to live a certain lifestyle...if said person can't personally afford to...on someone else's dime. If there's no kids involved a person shouldn't be in a former spouse's pocket/bank account. If you want to keep a certain lifestyle after a divorce you need to have some things in place that will allow you to do so. I agree with Adrienne if you're a stay at home parent get compensated for it, but don't rely on someone else to take care of you AFTER a divorce. Now if you and your spouse have an agreement in place where someone is going to support the other after a divorce by all means get that money.
+Victor Ochoa Not necessarily. There are people who gave up a succesful career and a high-paying job to be a full-time stay-at-home parent, while their partner continued their own succesful career and kept their high-paying job.
+mon julianna man, duh. Based on the few comments of yours that I've had the pleasure of reading, you seem to have a "victim" mentality. Dude, grow some balls and "man up." *Generally speaking* Steve Harvey said it best "Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man." In the midst of a divorce your soon to be former spouse isn't looking to make anything easier for you. Use your brain and make sure you and maybe your kids are taken care of. Don't expect someone or a judge to give/award you with spousal support. #ShavantiOut
Shavanti i don't have a victim mentality because i have experienced a lot and it seems to me that u need some life lesson. i would never let a man do everything for me. because i have my own. i stand on my own two feet. but this is real life, u never know a situation to u experience it and i will never wish bad luck on anyone. but i have seen so much and u never know until u are in that type of situation. 'act like a lady think like a man' really people like u would not understand some certain predicament until u experience real life changes.
Couldn't disagree more with the first speaker. I'm a woman and I do NOT expect to be entitled to half my future husband's earnings if we divorce. I'm his EQUAL, right? So I can take care of myself. It would be another thing if women like me couldn't care for ourselves (no education, no skills...), but we can. A few nights ago some girlfriends were talking about a female (ex-)professor of ours who got divorced after 20 years of marriage. The courts awarded HER HUSBAND (who's a baker & makes MUCH less than her) alimony. EVERY SINGLE PERSON AT THE TABLE called the husband a "parasite." I was like W-T-F?!!! If I were a man, I would NEVER get married. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
i cant do this yall, i am a lady and everyday i see comments saying men and women should have equality in the way they live, why is he giving her his money and he aint getting none of hers...
I've noticed a lot of women, some I know, believe that a woman's money is her money and a man's money is his AND hers. which is lame should be both ways
If it was a man taking money from a woman because he's accustomed to a certain lifestyle it would have been a whole different story with Loni... smh I can't with women like her. Double standard at its finest.
I thought the same. It would have made the item far more interesting. But sadly, it's because it would challenge their infantile mentality to examine anything consequential or from the other side of the argument. If it doesn't advantage women, it's off the topic list.
I'm with Adrienne. I was that girl who always said "I'm not working, it's my husband's job to take care of me" and then when it was in my best interest to leave my husband I was totally stuck for 10 long years coz I couldn't support myself. I lived an absolute horrendous life. And I kept saying "God I wish I had a job, I wish I had my own money" Always have a back up plan. Always have a game plan to take care of yourself. If you can't do it now, have ambition to do it for yourself 1 day. You owe yourself that much.
4:52 "When you get into a marriage, you don´t plan on divorcing" And yet almost 50 % of ALL marriages in the USA end up in a divorce or a separation. 😂😂😂 That should be a reason enough to include divorce and as a "what if" question in your planning.
Hear the last comment "When you marry you don't plan on divorcing" statistically proven WRONG-->Why then do women bring most of the divorces and why more than 50% get divorced
@@anthonyperkins5856 I used to be the law that you could duck an accused witch in a river to test if she was a witch or not. If she drowned, she was not guilty. The LAW is an ASS.
I think the point of spousal support is based on the law of partnership. The two are seen as one entity and splitting a partnership of 18 years shouldn’t leave one person broke, depending on the wealth in the partnership, both parties should be well taken care of. After 18 years regardless of how you choose to look at it, the lady does have a stake in wealth. Whether paid monthly or in a lump sum, it shouldn’t matter. The loss of a partner should be weightier.
+Irene Nwankpa Only stupid people go through life with rose coloured glasses. What if the other person is unfaithful or he asks for a divorce and replaces you with a hot, young thing? You better understand that life doesn't go how you want it and prepare for the worst while doing your best. #reallife
Cassandra Muzik I'm yet to get your point? I'm sure what I said is real life. I'm entitled to my opinion as you are to yours so have several seats ok dear.
They would have been gender neutral when discussing the hypothetical examples, but no, it was about ‘her’ spending her time with ‘him’ that should be financially compensated somehow
@@a.sydney5036 Jeannie was upset because he comes from a wealthy family. He asked for spousal support and was granted it because Jeannie out-earned him during their marriage But ... he's from a rich family and didn't deserve any support from her. Not to mention it's not like he had any real support or say-so in her financial endeavors. She was basically a self-made woman despite being married. That was the issue. Personally I think spousal support/alimony is BS no matter who is paying it.
Jesus Christ! Matthew 19:10 "His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” Stay single my friends! The bible has warned you!
I read that about 3% of men get spousal. I was curious so I looked up female celebs that had to pay and Janet Jackson, Madonna, Roseanne, Britney Spears, and Jennifer Lopez were among some of the celeb women who have paid.
My opinion may stem from my limited knowledge of spousal support, but it just seems wrong. Why should any adult be responsible for funding the life of another adult? At at certain age even your parents are no longer financially responsible for you so why should your ex-spouse be? If you want to continue whatever lifestyle you had when you were married then work for it.
+StingingwithqueenC People tend to forget marriage is a legal contract. If you break a contract, there should be some consequences. That's why you should think through very carefully who you get married to, and ask yourself, 'is this a person i'm willing to go broke for?' :P
+StingingwithqueenC divorce used to be a thing never heard before.... then divorce went on the rise and you ended up with women in their 30s-40s, having been married outta high school and raising babies, never had a job, no skills no experience, and now no husband to take care of her.... *that's* why spousal support became a thing.... of course now times have changed, we have working women, working mothers, etc etc etc.... so should a man automatically pay spousal support when divorced? IMHO, no... however, you have to consider the women who actually need it to live, and not to necessarily "maintain a certain lifestyle", like is done with all these rich divorces.....
firebaby7 Well it doesn't quite work like that. The spouse who makes more money pays spousal support, therefore, in this day, with women having the opportunity to earn more money than in the past, the woman could very well be the spouse who pays. e.g. Megan Fox
I'm gonna be honest, I'm not a mother nor was ever in a divorce, but I can't grasp the idea of "compensation" for being a mother or a wife. You weren't held at gunpoint, you didn't sign up for something and didn't read the fine print--why should someone have to "compensate" for your decision? And why do some women feel the need to get money for the time they "stroked a man's ego"? They are MARRIED. They love the OTHER PERSON. Isn't it normal and expected for both spouses to care for each even when they don't feel up to it? Also, isn't it a mother's job to care for her own child? Why should a husband give her compensation because she chose not to hire a nanny? That is THEIR child. THEIR decision. THEIR marriage. It's not just one person... Again, I'm not a mother or divorced person, but I don;t understand how ANY OF THIS would make sense even if I was married and had kids.
Thank you God.. most women are so unreasonable when it comes to this topic .. they know deep down it's wrong but who wouldn't wanna hit the lotto just for being married
Tanila G And no one forces you women to make those “sacrifices”. These are choices women made and men should not have to pay for them. Any woman who claims spousal support are lazy
@@junaldinho100 so, if a woman chooses to raise her child instead of working and having the child raised by another, she's considered lazy? How about if the child is disabled and the father chooses to leave the household, the womans "choice" to sacrifice a career and care for that child, is "lazy". Clearly you are biased and do not live in that reality.
As a feminist I am against spousal support , it's not feminist at all to take money from your ex husband. Unless it's for the kid... No woman should agree with that
Alimony is inherently sexist in itself, it’s basically saying the poor little helpless women can’t take care of herself so the man has to pay for her to live.
Loni’s attitude is why many men are simply saying “no” to marriage. I am not responsible for 1) your inability to CREATE the lifestyle you want, 2) your mistaken belief that marriage is a financial arrangement that continues into perpetuity. How filthy is that? “I married Steven Spielberg, so if we divorce, I’m not going back to lifestyle I had BEFORE. He must maintain that”. Not much incentive there for a successful marriage. It’s like a prize fight with a huge payday, regardless of the outcome. No thanks.
I can't stand them interrupting each other and saying "no no no" and making faces when someone else is talking. It's okay to disagree but be quiet until it's your turn then speak your peace lol
Steve Harvey Says Every Married Couple Should Have 4 Bank Accounts 1) Account for all necessary items The first account that Harvey says a married couple needs is one account with shared money. This takes care of things that need to be paid, like car notes, mortgage, electric bill gas bill, food, etc. "Everything that maintains your lifestyle," he says. 2) Savings account Harvey says that a second essential account is a savings account, and one that requires two signatures to move. "Out of every check-I don't care if it's $5, $10, $100-you've got to agree to put something in that savings account." 3 and 4) Personal accounts for each party Harvey then advocates that each party have their own accounts, filled with money that they solely decide what to do with.
Adrienne contradicted herself, wasn't she the same one preaching about you shouldn't have prenups because it's basically planning your divorce? Having a "backup plan" would be doing exactly that. In reality both are just "incase" plans so you're prepared IF you do end up getting divorced.
I think a back up plan is what one personally will do and could say "I have a back up plan" if something went wrong in the marriage a prenup is legalized and all
Kashief Mc no having a prenuptial agreement sign and contracted w ur spouse as soon as u get married n say i do , is not the same as saving some of own money jst n case u may need it one day.. or makin sure u have a career of ur own so u arent not relying on someone else to take care of u when things get to tht point n ur marriage..
ANNA ROSE ya or anything or can get sick n hey hes out of work n now she has to step up n provide .. so nothing wrong w havin ur own aside. my pastor got sick w cancer went thru kimo n all .. his wife stayed home n didnt ever work but whn he was sick n couldnt she had to do something to hlp.
"I'm used to a certain lifestyle" seriously? The life style package came WITH the man, if you up and leave him you are not ENTITLED to that lifestyle anymore. Jesus, it's no wonder marriage rates are dropping.
***** I love the fact that she seems like the free-spirit, adventurer-type. But like you said, she sometimes says some off-the-wall crazy things that just makes her seem... uncaring.
I agree with Adrienne and Tamera, like have your own money because sadly life happens. Maybe you'll be fine for the next 20 years, but when push comes to shove. You'll be glad you saved up for 20 years, and have the satisfaction to say: "I need nobody else but myself." !
"sometimes the man is the kid as well" but she's arguing for this "kid" to support you after you're divorced. "I'm a strong independent women, until I have to live on my own, then a man needs to pay for me to live"
This is strange. On one side, they say women should have their own money. Yet on the other hand, they are advocating for taking spousal support from men.
I'm sorry, coming from a guy: If I'm working, that's money that I have earned and you are not a charity case. Get a job and work for your own money. If I happen to make more, for whatever reason, yes I'll cover certain costs like he house or whatever, but I'm not loaning or "giving" you anything. If you want something, work for it. If you don't want to get a job and stay home, that's great. But, don't expect me to buy you anything you want or to support you if we get divorced.
I think Adrienne felt some sort of shade from Jeannie... Since Adrienne is saying her opinion and is not even married.. But hey I agree with Adrienne!!!
+Donovan Nelson Well, I took Adrienne's expression more as, "damn, I didn't realize Jeannie's makeup was that jacked up today" than anything else..haha!
Well, this really helped me make up my mind as to not get married...ever! I've shacked up before and I'll continue to do so. Of course while I'm in the 'arrangement' I'll contribute my fair share of the financial responsibilities and other duties around the house. To get married, then divorce if things don't work out, doesn't make sense anymore. Remember marriages have a 50% of success. And of those who remain married life isn't puppies and kittens! It's more like I tolerate you. By the way, why was the prettiest of them all who sided with Melanie Griffith completely?
I agree a man should support his children financially if he’s not with their mother, but if you’re not his wife anymore, you are no longer his spouse to support. It’s then up to you to make your own lifestyle!
1. If you can work, WORK 2. IF YOU REALLY NEED the support you should reccive it for a short amount of time 3. As Chris Rock says a long time ago: "Men shoulds start to say I'm used to have sex 3 times a week" so because they are accustomed they should recived. 4. If we are done, we are done I dont want or need anything from you and you should do to 5. Let's start doing this in the other, women would be SO ANGRY they would understand. 6. . Equality is in both ways.
I have mixed feelings about spousal support only because there are people who truly need it or have given a certain level of sacrifice during the marriage that does not allow them to be as lucrative after the marriage, but there are also those who abuse this. I think ultimately it should be a case by case basis determined by influential factors rather than solely income.
I hear the Australian system is better. You pay for 1 year some fraction of your income. That 1 year is the time in which the woman should get back into work market and if she doesn't then too bad for her.
@Ben Tennyson I'd say one year is good enough. The person who's been "stay at home" has to make a portfolio and apply for new jobs and all that. One year is just ok. Enough time to get back in market. But forcing to pay beyond that is just rewarding stupid behaviour. People make your husbands and wives work, even if most of it gets spent on crèches or nannies.
“When you get married you don’t plan on divorcing…” Yeah, well when I get into my car I don’t plan on getting into a car accident, but I still put on my seat belt.
@Sabine Mouton I never said she didn't do anything wrong. Just that, from her perspective, he was in fact hard to live with. You got an issue, take it up with the OP or Loni
@@writerspen010 in his perspective, she was the one who's hard to live with, so that balances out. Also, you were the one who commented on op's thread. If u dont want to get a reply, dont comment.
so why does the man have to continue with alimony, I understand maybe for a few years but lifetime alimony is BS. I women should be able to support herself and let go of the marriage. Living the lifestyle she is used to is also BS, while the man suffers in EVERYWAY. It's a life sentence for him. Shame on these judges for allowing women to take advantage of there ex. Paying alimony only keeps 2 people that do not want to be together connected in a way that keeps them from moving on to have a chance at happiness. Divorce means that is your X, that's your past life, How can a man move on when he has a rope around his neck financially. Women let it go... move on and let him have a life. My boyfriend is a good man and does not deserve to have a future with no light at the end. sad. I wish i could change the NJ laws.
