they got back together 16 years ago after he cheated on her. She put him on a pedestal so high that I do not understand this woman. Low self-respect in my opinion.
@@dvdgalutube perhaps he made up for it in some way. We don't know their whole relationship from one short clip. Are you the same person you were 16 years ago? Maybe he's a better person now.
My first love broke up with me at the direction of his religious and controlling mother, and I was devastated. We married other people and 30 years after the breakup I finally got my apology, and that unresolved pain finally went away. He is divorced and living with his mother and I am married to a wonderful man now 24 years. Trusting life is hard but things do work out for a reason.
I don't believe in God because anyone who has to "teach us a lesson to not trust our hearts with duplicitous predators" is such a d*ck move for an omniscient being.
This is a great lesson that soothing music in background doesn't make a horrible story beautiful. This clip needed background music from the movie called IT.
sadly not everyone can do it. most probably she left him for another he got the kids wanted revenge and a nanny.she was there waiting the whole time. so sad. later he might cheat again once the kids are on their own..
I can tell she loves him more than she loves herself, maybe she couldn’t move on because she didn’t know how to, because there’s just no way this was ok
In my 10 year relationship I was cheated on once (as far as I know) and other than that this person was entirely perfect, loving, kind, sweet, amazing. Left him obviously, his last words to me were a few compliments and "I've never been more depressed in my life." I tell people we grew apart because I'm not interested in being bitter or telling the story that once broke my heart all the time. Despite how amazing and good he was to me, despite how much we grew together, despite how much I once loved him and vice versa, there will never, I repeat, *never* be a day that goes by where I will ever want him back. Love does not conquer all because it doesn't have to.
In this case, no. In order to love somebody you have to trust that person, and when you cheat on someone, you can never trust them again, no matter how hard you try, and that of which I actually did (something I chose not to mention before). You might *think* you love that person after they cheat, but when it actually happens to you, and if you choose to try and work it out, you'll slowly come to realize that you will become a shell of your previous self. You will act out the loving things you did before but there will always be a hole in your heart and continues to open for as long as you're with them, especially knowing that every time they go out or are away from you that you cannot trust where they claim they are. There will always be a deceit factor in the back of your mind no matter how hard you try to push it away. That is not love, that is torture. To allow your partner to continue on with that is not love, it's carelessness. Caring is the first step to love. I chose to leave in the end, it was the best choice for me, *true* love could not be restored. The damage was done.@@Gingerblaze
@@Gingerblaze Yeah, it can. But let's be honest, not everyone wants to go through all that, they'd rather have a fresh start. Can't really blame them but it does shatter the childhood idea of love.
He got back to you after exploring other options… it’s not a beautiful story it’s somehow heartbreaking that this beautiful lady couldn’t get over that toxic person in her life and didn’t find a true love that she deserves
@@peaceofmindofpeace1650 Yes, low self-esteem will often trigger a person to compromise themselves in unrecognizable ways. Very similar to Stockholm syndrome
I met him in college, we were together all four years...when I graduated, he went to California for vacation by himself. I found out through friends that he had come back 2 weeks later, without telling me. He said he didn't miss me at all. To say I was devastated was an understatement. Last I heard he got married...life is hard when you fall in love with the wrong person 😢
As Cliche as it sounds you dodged a bullet. You can’t miss a life you never had. The red flags were probably there and you were to infatuated to see them. It’s for the best.
The reason I think this is dumb is because he cheated on her. It would’ve been different if they grew apart and then ended up making their way back to each other.
This is not dumb and no thats not true they don’t always cheat the guy will not cheat once he meets the one. Aah the part i bet these people that made these comments you have not lived through much. You say think based on what ? I say it’s not dumb because i have lived through all of this myself.
@@princessaurora9735I can agree with you. A long time ago, my bf and I made a commitment to each other but we were both young and dumb and he had trust issues. When it happened, of course I was upset because he broke a promise but I still love him so we sat down and talked. We talked about why it happened, how much it hurt…we talked about our relationship and what we wanted it to look like, what we needed it to look like if we were going to stay together. We made a list of everything we needed from each other such as complete honesty and we decided that if either of us ever felt the need to cheat, we would tell each other first and that would be the end. We worked through the trust issues together despite the pain. Love can still be there after someone cheats…if you’re willing to forgive and work on those underlying issues together. It’s been almost 10 years and my bf and I are utterly devoted to one another. It was definitely hard and there were many nights full of tears and doubt, but he went out of his way to earn my trust and I showed him mercy. Together we overcame the pain and we’re stronger for it. We worked through it but this isn’t something everyone can do nor is it something you should do. If your partner has hurt you in a way you believe is not redeemable then it’s ok to walk away. For my partner and I, a mistake happened but we were both willing to fix things because we loved each other.
As a therapist i would say a heart thing to do here is to have a confrontation with him get your answers, then leave. You heal at your own timing but makes healing from that loss easier
People in the comments are crazy. Comparing him in his 20' to probably 40's...of course people can change. And look how happy she talks about the last 16 years
The “one who got away” was a family friend so I continued to hear about him for 30 years. I rarely saw him over these 30 years but I often dreamed about him, sad dreams that left me depressed for days. His father died and I went to the funeral and realized he had grown into someone I would not want to be with. It was so freeing! I knew I had picked the right husband. And I never dream about him anymore.
No she isn't 😅😅😅, how can you listen to this and say that. There is no doubt that guy is a POS but she isn't great herself - she led another guy on for over a decade whiles still yearning for the POS that cheated on her. Imagine being with a person who got with you because the one she truly wanted to be with didn't want her and as soon as he came back for her, she threw herself back into his arm leaving you behind.
Nothing good can happen taking back a man that cheated on you and had three kids with another woman, chosing her over you. I hope she lives a good life and is happy, but this is definitely no ispiration, no couple goals
My grandmother has an ex fiancé who is just like this. Broke up with her after her dad died, just weeks before their wedding day and married another woman. This was over 50 yeas ago and this man TO THIS DAY sends messages to her. Turns out the wife left him after 10 years and he remarried 2 times, none of the relationships worked out. My grandma married my grandpa and was happy for 40 years until he passsed. She still ignores her ex pleads to get back together. Some men are pathetic and this lady just got caught in this pathetic dude's web.
I agree. I had a guy who left me when I was going through a difficult personal time. Years later he wrote me a letter wanting to get back together. I tore that letter up!!! Hell no
@@kinndah2519 Did did he really know that? She left him as soon without even confronting him about cheating. Couldn't it be that he still remembered and missed her and come to realise that she would have been the better choice? People change yknow.
She probably drove him away. If she was better he would have kept her. Sounds like he enjoyed the women that played soccer. Maybe she should have showed more interest in soccer instead of sitting on her but all day.
I have that guy that occasionally pops in my dreams, but what helps me is remembering all the crap he put me through and that he really wasn’t a nice guy. When I start to daydream about those good times I have to stop and remind myself their were clear red flags and signs that he wasn’t for me. I loved the idea of him but I really didn’t love him. I was infatuated with him. I have dreams about a life that we never had, and so what’s the point in dwelling on that? I wanted to live the life I have now. I have a wonderful husband, two beautiful children, and I don’t want to dwell on a life I never have and never will have. God is the one who took that man out of my life and I trust that God has a sovereign plan for my life and it doesn’t include him. I love him as a human and I pray the best for him but that’s about it. It’s been over 10 years and we’re not the same people anymore.
Cheater for life cheated on her then left mom of 3 to cheat again and reunite with ex lover.GREAT!!!🙄🙄🙄 Don’t do this ever again… millions out there for you… let them go forever.
We don’t know if he left her for his ex, they likely divorced. The old saying of “once a cheater, always a cheater” is actually rarely true. I’m not giving him a pass by any means, and I couldn’t ever get past that, but hopefully he was young and stupid and eventually matured and now spends every day making sure he’s the man this woman deserves.
@@ts3063 Attachment theory helps us understand behaviours and reactions in relationships. I don’t believe it’s the complete picture to understand others and ourselves, but it helps. I find Internal Family Systems to be a more complete way to understand. In this specific case, we may say the lady has a particular attachment style that means she is happy to be with someone who has cheated on her in the past. Attachment theory may also help us understand why the man cheated. Hope that helps.
@@cinny_ Yeah, I don't really want to give my direct opinion on people's relationships. If someone wants to try to understand what I meant, they can read about the theory.
Wow!!! This should be a movie!! I wonder how she forgave him for cheating on her !!! And how did she learn to trust him again after he broke her heart!
He chose her , and not you at that moment. Again when she left her he came back to you only for you to take him back like wha? Lady you need to see therapist. What a great manipulator the man will be . Be safe lady
The single women for years in the chats are going crazy. She been with now for another 16 years while you still using peanut butter to get attention from your cats.
You don’t know if the guy recognised his mistake or not or there was clearly something he needed to walk through. Y’all be so judgemental yet not even perfect in your lives. People CAN change, mature, be better. If they can’t, they will clearly show you. But if they can, it’s absolutely useless to live in the past.
@@amyqb117yep we grow up and change realize that love always return in a new way and the worldis bigger than High School. The problem is not the cheating, there is nothing new about it. The issue here is bring the gf and the side piece in a picnic together while chilling and playing soccer. That's borderline psychopathic.
@@gostavoadolfos2023 okay and still so what? Cheating itself is psychotic too. If you can accept that he has grown up from cheating, how are the other actions above growing up from? I’m talking about ALL and everything that he did wrong to her. And if Ofcourse he hasn’t grown from it, she should dump him.
Nah, if the dudes I grew up around were in her shoes, they wouldn’t look back because they all have self respect. “Can’t make a hoe a housewife, time to move on.”
Because when you get older you realize life is too short .... And again did you hear her say they were young a lot of people when they're young they make mistakes they cheat it's not like he gave her some horrible STD LOL and clearly he ended up not working out with the lady he cheated with and now they get to be together if he would have stayed with her maybe they would have ended up hating each other and you know now she gets him when he's older and more mature she doesn't have any kids so it's kind of cool and now she gets to have kids in her life I don't see the problem here you can't help who you love in the heart wants what it wants and I really think people are meant to be
Even if you leave a partner that cheated on you , you are likely to meet another partner that has cheated on another. It's a cycle. None is better than the other. It's better to work on one relationship than multiple relationships. Love is eternal. It can come and go. It is never lost. Only humans are temporary.
@@JessicaL-wf3et No. Cheating is the symptom of deep rooted issues within yourself. It’s a true character flaw. He could choose not to cheat because he experienced the destruction and pain it causes but he will always struggle with staying faithful just like a recovering alcoholic will always struggle to stay sober. Just like a recovering addict will always struggle to not use his choice of drug, a cheater will always struggle to not cheat. Just my opinion. It’s too risky to invest in such a person. I’d rather invest in a person that has deep rooted moral convictions against cheating such that it would destroy him if he ever went against those convictions.
Love is made up of two very good forgiving people. She isn’t delulu or wrong for her choice, she chose to forgive him after healing and that’s beautiful
she didn't heal. She obsessed over him and then fawned when he popped back into her life, after he was done being a 304 and producing children with someone else, but still needed a mommy to raise them on his weekend.
She never mentioned being with anyone else since him, until she " met up" with him again. She's mentioned step kids, not any of her own. I think he sought her out, to get back with her. She seems overly happy in a not so healthy way. Like she knows she's not his first choice. Like a consolation prize and she accepted it as "love" coming back to her. That's not how love works.
@@shereebuckley7208 absolutely. She never got over him. Sometimes when you can't, you have to work towards it and she didn't. She was always obsessed and now she's making it seem like some sort of a deep love story.
Glad they got back together and are in love as long as it's healthy that's a blessing it's remarkable how love can connect people after several years apart 🙏
This is despicable. I would never want a relationship with someone who cheated on me. Their morals are screwed up, thinking that having sex with someone else while you have a relationship is OK. The person hasn't changed. He just got his way a second time, but as long as she doesn't understand what she's done, she will probably be OK. She is extremely insecure, and he prayed on that. It's her life I guess.
A third time. He had three kids from the woman he had an affair with, but now they have five step-kids. The math doesn't add up unless he had kids with a second woman, then convinced her to help raise all of them.
I don't defend cheaters but it does sound like the man was young and stupid. When years pass, and one has brought chikdren to the world, sex does not play such an important role as when we are young. Companionship, compatibility, etc. are just as important and people do change with age if they want to 🤔
@@charisma-hornum-fries well that's true, but one thing is definitely true for me is that, I can never ever compromise on my principles, I might be extremely sad in his absence but my dignity wouldn't allow me to live in that grief for 16 years, and even after 16 years of intelligence to be wid a cheater, but again as I said to each their own ❤️
He was ONLY VERY YOUNG.. and it's hard to settle down with someone you've knows from a teenager... not everyone can do that...but their love brought thwm back together.. and they are together now for 16 years!! That's everything. Thisnhas happened to my adult child... I k ow he will one day come back to his great love of 10 yr 1st girlfriend... but it will take time. Sometimes life seperates you for a while ..❤
@@sarahmurphy-nf4yl nah mate, but u don't cheat on your partner, I have seen so many teens owning up that they don't want to continue wid them and break up and just move on, but u can't cheat😭 How do u cheat on someone, that's extremely low, if your son cheated on his gf, then I'm sorry to say no matter how grt his love is, u failed as parent, cause teens know better !!!
The comment here... many doesnt undersrand that Love is in God's hand... we cant control it when it comes and when it goes... we can only experience the joy, the pain and learn the lessons... May we all stay strong in His Mercy ❤❤❤
I used to work with this guy and one day he’s talking about his ex and the way he was talking and reminiscing about her. His face changed and the look in his eyes almost tender. He was about to get married to another girl who was lovely and I asked him why didn’t he marry the girl he loved so much and was perfect for him. I’ll never forget this he said men marry when they are ready not when they find the one 💔
Guys, it's never too late. Sometimes we're young, and we make stupid decisions. Even if they aren't stupid, they really were meant for each other, you can tell she adores her stepchildren. Absolutely love that for her
She reunited with the man who was unfaithful to her, obviously childless as a result of the separation, and then sees his return with his children as a blissful ever after??? Ugh. There's really no fairytale ending after that truly tragic beginning, except in her own mind.
So while with her he found who he really wanted, married and had children with the other woman, gave her his best years. When things went south, he "ran" into this woman; made more children (or she already had children) and now he's giving his "leftovers" life with his safety net woman, got it. I could be wrong but that's how it looks to me.
@@iridescentraindrops so you are assuming that she takes care of him? And he does nothing? Wouldn’t he also take care of her too? They have been together 17 years now.
@@mowgli7_ You're also assuming that he cares about her in some way. Being with someone for many years doesn't automatically mean they both contribute equally in the relationship. And taking into consideration that he chose to cheat on her behind her back, it means he never respected or loved her that much.
She said, " I dreamt about them EVERYNIGHT for YEARS". Oh my, she was left heartbroken and waking up sad and crying everytime night for years. She cant let go of him even after the anguish he put her through. I know this by heart, been seeing him in my dreams and woke up crying for 7 years. I still loved him even years after he betrayed me. But when I am reminded how he gaslighted me, lied constantly and cheated on me, I realized I needed to be kind to myself. I can never take back the 6 years I've spent with him and 7 years of pain after the breakup. Its been 11 years now, I still deal with the trauma, trust issues and all. I started dating recently. But taking back a guy who left me hurting for years? NO. Sometimes the cheater just slowed down, a changed man when they are old but he just settled with someone who is ready and willing to take him in. There is no competition because he run out of options or he can't deal being an option. Her face speaks delusion.
We often torture ourselves. She is courageous to take that risk again she is brave. We let people and love control us from the grave. 16 years shes living her best life with this man I say cheers to her.
you should all seek therapy bc it's not normal to let this thing drag with you for years. not very healthy. were you married or lived in adultery I wonder? bc with half his money I m sure you would heal faster. with nothing , hmmm well.....
I just want to put positivity in this comment section. She seems happy, the kids had [at least] two parents to raise them, and the man has a family. I personally don’t think I could reconnect with an unfaithful partner. *People can and often do grow after sixteen years.* This isn’t to defend his action, just to focus on the seemingly happy outcome. I don’t think a ~18-22 year old cheating on his girlfriend immediately equates to never being able to have a happy marriage nor make amends ever again.
I was all "wow! That's a magical story" and then I read the comments. Boy, the music and the way she told the story got me thinking good about her story.
My ex did the same! We got back together after 15 yrs. He was not a good man back then. Drugs, drinking, prison, you name it. He left our marriage truthfully to be with someone who he was a better match with at that time. He told me when we reconnect that he couldn’t face me anymore with all the bad stuff he was doing bc I was a decent person who did the right things and she just didn’t care. I always say she deserved the man he was and I deserve the man he is now who is literally the most wonderful man ever❤ People can change!
A good reminder that not everyone is meant to be in your life at all times. And sometimes you set them free and they come back to you, if they are meant to.
I am sorry for you that you cant see the beauty of forgiveness, patience, acceptance in her joyful eyes... sometimes life test is not abt the ideal life we imagine... but more to the quality of ur soul facing such hardships that is out of our ideal....@@eurekamreum5458
@@eurekamreum5458 They have been together and happy for 16 years. It's not always black and white. Also realistically, it doesn't matter as much when you're older. You recognise that people make mistakes, had to travel a different paths and you are grateful for things working out.
I thought my one had gotten away, and I regretted pushing him away in high school. We got back together years later and were engaged for five years. I realized I loved the idea of him and what we could be more than who we really were together and I think he’d admit the same. It ended and I realized how much time I spent on regret that I don’t have now and never should’ve to begin with. Let go of the memory of who they were, because even if you find each other again, it’s a new relationship, and they’re a new person too, just like you. I’ve had those dreams/nightmares too. They get less vivid with time. Keep giving it time. You are worth waiting for, just as much as your one is worth finding.
I personally wouldn’t get back with a cheater but you know what? People grow up and you never know someone’s situations, trauma or pains in life. I’m not going to judge him and hope that he’s been nothing but good to her❤
This is so sad 😢 There are men like him getting women who truly love them from bottom of their heart and soul And cheat with other woman And then there are majority of Men species as whole just wanting and literally dreaming about this kind of love from women till they are old like for decades majority of men just hold on hope
Bro nurses and medical staff in oncology department are trained to prepare for the sick wife getting abandoned by the husband and even him bringing the new woman to meet her. That fact speaks about men species more than this vidéo 😅
@@cynthiacrawford6147 It isn't true. That info is based on a stupid study which had too small of a sample size. It was taught to us in the first day in stats that stats can often be used to lie and this is a great example. Anyway, there are more concrete explanations other than "men bad" which explains this even if it is true. Men generally are not able to process and express emotions as women do, they often just shut down or try to ignore the emotions altogether. A romantic partner suffering from a chronic illness could be too much and they try to run from it. That is true not just when others are suffering but for their own selves too, That's why the rate of men unaliving themselves and being addicts is much higher.
This lady is sooo beautiful. Why? Use your gut feeling, eyes, ears, skin, heart. She is a woman you should never ever leave, cheat on, hurt her. Instead, be grateful, joyful, enamoured you met someone like her. As a woman, i can tell...❤
No, this is sad. I met a lady who told me kinda a similar story but I don’t understand how someone can leave the person they’re supposed to be with marry someone else have kids be unhappy obviously because they got divorced and then go back with the one they were supposed to always be with Idk 🤷🏽♀️ that makes me sad 😔 and I can’t understand it.
Getting to this level of comfort and commitment, compassion, confidence.. Takes one hell of a pain 😔 I'm sincerely so happy that in the end she had her part of love and time.. ❤
I still feel sad for this woman. She seems to be a very sweet soul, no vengeance, selling herself short. But as long as she is happy I guess that makes it aright. What makes her even more heartbreakingly beautiful is that fact that she doesn’t have kids of her own and still happy person. God bless her.
I feel her story so strong. I really liked this boy when i was 12/13 but i was the ugly friend nobody wanted, so i set him up with my best friend. It broke me, so i lost contact with him. I lost my friends i left school had a baby at 16 but i got in contact with him again when my daughter was 6 months old. Her dad was abusive to me and i was with a new boy who was cheating but it didnt matter my bestfriend was back. I started to look forward to his messages everyday it felt good in a dark time. We got together when my daughter was 9 months old weve been together 9 years and have a 5 year old son together. Im crying while typing this because i was the ugly friend but i won in the end. Do not give up ❤
People with low emotional intelligence often get swept away of their feet when they meet someonw gorgeous. Don't make your life such a low priority that your life revolves around someone else. Even when that someone else has done nothing for you.
