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What Do Enneagram Fives Secretly Want in Relationships?

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Enneagram Fives, a type who can feel invaded and overwhelmed by other people’s feelings and energy, need to find a way to walk that line. Before they invite anyone into their space, Fives will assess how much energy that person will demand and whether the price of connection is worth paying.
Yet secretly, Fives want connection. They want someone to share their mental curiosities with and to enjoy life with, but who also will be okay with their need for privacy and contained expression of emotion.
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Опубликовано:

17 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 27

@landrydowdy2396 2 года назад

Is it weird that this kind of sounds like a 1950's lesson for women to deal with husbands lol

@MyCenterPeace 2 года назад

This confirms it… I’m going to die alone. I can’t think of any man that would care to do any of these 3 steps 😕

@donnathedead7554 2 года назад

No, only a woman would be stupid enough to do all this crap just to be in a relationship.

@ladyydinah 2 года назад

Me too😂😂

@mattblom3990 2 года назад

I'm 7w8 who's just starting to date a 5. It takes certain person to have the right temperment for you 5s, but we exist.

@donnathedead7554 2 года назад

@@mattblom3990 Well the good news is, you don't actually need to do any of this. Most 5s don't even want this, let alone need it. Space sure but, I have never in my life asked a partner for more space or felt I wasn't given enough. Most people have a life outside of the relationship and that provides all the space needed by any normal person.

@mattblom3990 2 года назад

@@donnathedead7554 Are you a 5? Can I ask you some questions?

@generalrendar7290 Год назад

With the control, it could be as simple as asking for their help or knowledge. You don't have to go full their way or the highway. If something I did or an idea I came up with contributed to us having a good time that makes my day. Being asked to contribute makes me feel so valued as a partner, I do not have to run the whole show. The physical touch description is spot on. It's not that we can't embrace for a long time, we just need to warm up to it. My ex would often give me a passionate kiss and hug when I got to the apartment and then we would either cook dinner, go out and do something, or one of us would have a task we needed to get done so we'd occupy ourselves until we were both ready to hang out. I knew that my ex wanted more but she was very understanding and really appreciated the intimacy of our physical contact. The fact that she would give me space for a bit really helped, almost like a reboot for the evening or day.

@generalrendar7290 Год назад

@YemimaHutapea our families didn't mix was the biggest reason we broke up. She would also lie when she didn't have to. Mostly to save herself embarrassment, but she did it to the point of making it uncomfortable to force her to finish trickle truthing her. Her mom was always in a crisis or needed help. She had a terrible relationship with her dad, and her friends liked to drink and party and were slutty. It still hurt to end it, though. If he does go back, it's because the relationship was familiar, but 5s are fairly decisive. The biggest reason that we got back together a couple times was because of how persistent she was, and the fact that my family had given me an ultimatum to break up with her. The rest of my exes I've never spoken to again.

@donnathedead7554 11 месяцев назад

@YemimaHutapea It may interest you to know many 5s have something called phantom ex syndrome, where they maintain a mental space for a singular past love, often their entire lives. In theory, they would return to the phantom ex (there is usually something preventing them from doing so, like death of the phantom ex). Other than that, they would never return although they are susceptible to hoovering like anyone else, but they would never initiate contact and in general would prefer to move on. If you did anything bad or hurtful to them or were very inconsistent with you character, you are not the phantom ex. It's usually a first love, first crush, etc., the one that got away, a generally positive experience with little to no drama that left them wanting more. If they have a dead lover, that is the phantom ex.

@KendrixTermina 2 года назад

i would never ask anyone to do that sort of ridiculous hoop-jumping dance on my account, much less someone I loved. It's a bad joke, really, I want to be as unobstrusive & low maintenance as possible, but I'm apparently cursed to be so weird people seem to need an instruction manual.

@is1dre Год назад

You're reading my mind. I feel exactly like this. Crazy!

@8teillumin 2 года назад

Yes all three of these BUT my recent ex and I had started to grow apart and she felt separated from me as I wasn’t attentive enough and couplers with my low moods….

@8teillumin 2 года назад

Yes all three of these BUT my recent ex and I had started to grow apart and she felt separated from me as I wasn’t attentive enough and couplers with my low moods…. Hmm talks about emotions now that’s the hard part.

@mikahlactpo 2 года назад

Very useful information tjanks

@donnathedead7554 2 года назад

In other words, we don't actually want a relationship.

@luizbcosta Год назад

exactly 😂😂😂

@badpoetry33 11 месяцев назад

😂 ☠️

@EmmysCoolVids123 Год назад

Can 5s truly love someone?

@TruityLabs Год назад

Of course. But how they express love, care and affections going to look different the other types. Fives are very sensitive to connection, it's actually incredibly important to them, even though it doesn't look that way from the outside.

@EmmysCoolVids123 Год назад

@@TruityLabs would a 5 marriage to a 6 work?

@TruityLabs Год назад

@@EmmysCoolVids123 Of course. It helps if you take time to learn about each others approach to relationships and develop your own communication style, and type can help you recognise each others patterns and understand what's behind them. A successful marriage or relationship has more to do with the ability to communicate with each other than with a specific type combination. Although relationships that do work well are where both couples have a similar level of self-awareness and maturity.