What INFPs Need in a Partner 

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my way of opening up to people is oversharing and then regretting it for years

"INFPs would often rather just spend time in their imaginations than the real world." I mean...have you seen the real world?!

- Isolate yourself - finally open up to someone - overshare - be ashamed of yourself - repeat

As an INFP, I love being friends with extroverts, cause they can awake a extrovert side of me that I can't awake on my own. So the perspective of having a partner that helps me socialize is actually very pleasant. Is not like I don't want to be social, I just don't know how. I end up overthinking every social interaction to a point were it doesn't make sense anymore.

The best and most accurate thing I've heard about INFPs: We don't get angry at people. We get angry at what they are doing and then just imagine ourselves roasting them in our head but never actually say anything because we don't wanna bother them

"the INFPs personally is probably if not the most unique, the uniquest if you will, of the 16 personalities" wow I felt important

I'm INFP A and my husband is INFP T. We love each other tremendously, and we are best friends. You don't always need someone to change you. More often you need someone who understands and loves and respects you for who you are.

As an INFP, I have concluded that no partner is "needed". Thank you.

One thing not explored in depth here is that INFP needs someone who will truly listen, even to the most insignificant stories or ideas. We don’t always choose to share things because we assume others might think they are stupid, so when we do share and don’t receive validation, we tend to shut down.

If an INFP shares something with you it's important to them. Even if it's just a meme about dog in a hot dog bun. It's important to them. We tend to value things in a really weird hierarchy

Being an INFP while being autistic and also having social anxiety is a whole warzone... the last time a person interacted with me I began physically shaking and then went home and cried out of embarrassment... this is exactly why I get my daily dose of social interaction through book characters. 😂

When I found out I was an INFP, I was like damn. I always felt like I could never relate to anyone and that no one had the same thoughts and dreams and desires as me, and now I know why, BECAUSE I REALLY AM DIFFERENT FROM THE PEOPLE AROUND ME. It’s exhausting but rewarding, because I truly love the unique person that I am.

as an infp you will approach me and think “hm they see quiet and innocent” and then when you get to know us... we are loud and cant stop talking lol

“They feel like the connection at Starbucks with the barista is special” Okay enough is enough mane

"Everyone else might think that you only care about yourself" I resonate with this so well. People think I'm self centered and it really hurts, like they *tell* me.

I'm an INFJ in a fairly new relationship with an INFP and hearing how important this is to you all is definitely helpful! This person LOVES learning/sharing random, off the wall things they're intrigued by and I love to learn as well so I totally dig it, but also enjoy how excited they are to share. I'm glad to know that, just by being my curious self, listening and responding with my genuine, matched excitement is helping them feel heard and appreciated. You INFPs, when you open up and feel loved and trusted, damn, you love hard. I'm here for it! Keep being your intense, authentic selves! 😙

*Stranger holds door open for me* Me in my head: Wow. It means so much to me that a complete stranger took time out of their day to do something nice for me. That's so nice of them, time is valuable but they chose to use it by being nice to a complete stranger. 🥺🤧❤️ Me out loud: thanks :)

As an INFP, it’s hard to live with people misunderstanding me and then feeling completely lonely most times. I live in my daydreams 80% of the time.

Infps are the reason I still have hope in humanity ilysm :’) (enfj :D

Ever since I've taken my MBTI test, I've been utterly shocked. I never knew there was a whole personality type that hits so close to home, let alone having a large community of people who are just like me. it's honestly very emotional because I thought I was just a weirdo who was the only one who experienced these things for as long as I can remember, but knowing I'm not alone is kinda comforting. My relationships and even friendships have been hindered because I'm so misunderstood by other people (including myself) because they don't do not know how to manage me and my emotions so this is definitely a breath of fresh air knowing that there is some hope lol. watching and researching videos and other information is making me really self-aware and is helping me be more mindful which is so helpful. It's almost like having a mirror or your inner self. I will continue researching infp-t personality types, trying to go deeper and deeper, but this was definitely a good start!

We don't need a partner. Cause a partner break our hearts and expectations, so we just imagine having a partner. Let's start from there.

“INFP’s love to explore. They’re naturally adventurous even just in their mind.” LOL I felt that! 🤣

My closest friend is INFP and I am an ENFP. Best combo ever. I always challenge her to go beyond and curse people out for mistreating her. She calls me on my bullshit, cheer me on in my projects and the mutual respect, support and honesty is the best ever. The connection is deep as hell. We always seem to be able to appreciate eachother and raise eachothers spirit 😄 we understand eachothers idealism and imagination and both are wery kind. I can get way more cynical than her though, and that balances out. She needs to stop idealising shitheads, and I need to let go of anger.

I'm an INFP who just got out of a 16 year relationship with an INTJ. It wasn't all bad but he was the most emotionally invalidating person and once even straight up told me "your feelings are stupid". I knew 14 years ago that he wasn't the one for me and broke up with him, but came running back because I was lonely and my self-esteem was nonexistent. I convinced myself I could live a life without deep connection or affection from my own partner. What a pathetic dumbass I am. Now I'm 33 and recently divorced without kids and feel like I have no reason to even go on anymore. My mind is too screwed up and my issues run DEEP.

Me, an INFP, rewinding 10 seconds every so often because I missed what he said because I was daydreaming..

Me: yOu CaN't TeLl mE wHaT i NeEd! Frank: ~tells me I'm the uniquest and quotes David Bowie~ Me: ok homie we good

I am an INFP - and most of the time I am a very easy going type of person - unless someone attacks my deeply held convictions, beliefs, and faith - and then, I have no problem standing up for myself and what I have come to deeply believe in. I also have a tendency to somehow actually "feel" what other people are feeling and be able to talk to them and hopefully help them. My feelings ARE very intense. If someone yells at me without good reason - I completely withdraw emotionally and will never trust that person completely again - I will seal the most sensitive part of myself off from that person, and the relationship (IF there is still one left) will most likely never be the same. I also have a deep need to know the truth about many things and will research for hours and hours until I reach a place where I feel i've looked at all sides of things and then make a decision - and then, I will stick to that and not budge. I do not tend to believe something based on what popular opinion is, or what is touted in the news, or what Joe, down the street says, etc etc. It has to be something that I discover through many different avenues and turn over every stone to find. I think for many deeply sensitive people - they self -isolate because they are afraid of the world and are well aware of the cruelty of others, and this makes them very sad. I feel INFPs are most likely very altruistic and feel happiest when they are around other people who are idealistic like themselves and loving and compassionate. For myself, as an INFP - Trust and truth are deeply important. INFPs DO need a buffer to protect themselves from all of the bad things in the world so that they can feel safe.

My partner's an ENTJ. It feels like he is guiding me through the day hand in hand, leading the way while I am dreamily following. He keeps me grounded, validates my emotions but also makes sure to not dwell on those emotions for too long. Loving him is easy and life is too with him around. Couldn't be happier ☺

when you said “fear of judgment” you hit the nail on the head!!! i don’t hate people. in fact i yearn for human connection, i’m just really really afraid of being disliked

I swear we INFP's would rule the world, if only we had that one person who'd listen. 😭

My partner is an INFJ. I am an INFP. Feeling like an outsider, freak and invisible all my life it feels so good to be finally understood, seen and heard in my relationship with him. With extroverted people I tend to shut down. However, it's difficult for me to not just focus on my relationship, but also on friendships. Because being social takes so much energy.

I am an INFJ and my girlfriend is an INFP ^^ we're new in a relationship but it amazes me how we handle our own little thing and still connects it in each other's world. And what the Vid said is relatable, which makes me understand her deep thoughts and love her more.

What do we need? Only undying devotion and the mutual feeling of being as necessary to each other as another arm. No pressure or anything.

Me, an INFP, whenever Frank describes an INFP: oh my god I do that how'd he know

My husband is totally the grounded one in our marriage. 😆 He likes repetition and keeping life predictable, so we're a great team. He tends to go along with my crazy ideas, because he enjoys it, yet he drags me along to be more social! I'm not sure what his personality type is, but he's definitely my person after 18 years.

We're high maintenance but don't wanna be!! Yes, we need someone 1) grounded. 2) social. 3) understanding of our need for solitude. 4) explore partner. 5) someone who can go deep. 6) someone to challenge us to get out of our head. And... GL with all that, I say!

I am such an INFP that when he said not everyone has the need to feel their connection to their partner is deep and special, I just couldn’t fathom how anyone wouldn’t need that from their significant other. I’d rather be alone than to be with someone I have a meh average connection with.

Frank: “Their emotions are like an iceberg” Me: pauses video and stares at screen Me: whispers “I am an iceberg...”

I want someone who'll accept everything in me but who'll also make me a better version of myself

As a sexual assault survivor (and INFP) that ad terrifies me. It takes me a while before I tell someone my full legal name. Once they know, then they can also know your address etc. Also, several years ago I had a date (within a few minutes of meeting) look me up and show me my address on his phone. Absolutely terrifying. I refuse to use my legal name on LinkedIn or social media or anywhere because people can use things like that to find you. I realize it's typically marketed as a way to keep us safer but that has not been my experience.

Being an infp while having social anxiety... yeah, it's not great

Are there any other INFP’s that are introverted but want to have a social life and be more open? I don’t want to just be silent and at home, I want to explore it and meet many cool people, it’s just that I need a little time to be comfortable with someone :)

i’m an INFP but through therapy i find i’ve become a lot better at being social, it’s to do with growing my confidence for sure but also just caring less what other people think and trusting my own gut and desires.

I'm an ENTJ, and I don't like to make them feel intimidated. On the opposite, im interested in their creative imagination and their connection with the fantasy inside they heads that let them recover from anything that could be troublesome from the real world. I found that as a great skill, that I feel that I would love to explore and help to come again to the real world and share their imagination with us. (If that makes sense, unfortunately I'm not fluent so.. my ideas may be not clearly as I want)

The ideal partner : their imaginary friends

Frank: "INFPs would often rather just spend time in their imaginations than in the real world" Me: 👁👄👁

So basically I married the perfect match for me. 😊💕💕 I can cry in the shower after socialising too much (for me) and he somehow gets it. He’ll take our kids and be like “just chill, we’ll be back later.” He is totally my social buffer. After 20 years of marriage I can tell you Frank James has hit the nail on the head!

I am an INFJ married to an INFP. All these things are very true from my experience. I'm having to learn to adventure, help push us both to social connection (not EITHER of our strengths 😄), and figure out when to push vs let off, ground vs explore, offer solutions vs comfort, etc.

When I was younger I liked to go to sleep one hour before I would actually sleep just to lay in my bed in my dark room and create stories in my head. Well, now I know why.

I'm sorry but I have a connection with the barista from Starbucks, other people just don't see/understand it

Exploring my personality type, INFP, has really helped me understand that much of the pain I feel is because I think the world is an evil place, and that the world is not, in fact, cruel just because not everyone shares my idealistic values and my extremely high standard of politeness.

I'm an INFP and you described me to a T. And David Bowie is my favorite musical artist of all time, Space Oddity was a perfect bit to work into this. INFPs are always floating in a most peculiar way

"INFPs are one of the most unique, if not uniquest, personalities." I just sat here for a solid minute or two trying to figure out if that was sarcasm 😂 ~an INFP

*”INFPs are DEEPLY EMOTIONAL but the irony is they don’t often SHOW IT”* A sentence has never described me so perfectly before. *”And lots of times they also don’t even like taking about it.”* This one too!

As an INFP, I really struggle with keeping up with my chores and doing practical things. And this can get really frustrating because, at the same time, I'm a dreamer so I want to pursue these things. This has led me to create a "life hack" where whenever I need to get something done, I ask someone else to *tell me* to do the task. It's helpful because it switches me to following that command rather than thinking about what needs to be done... and eventually concluding that I'll do it tomorrow

I think we can be very social, but only when we’re in the mood. I know my social anxiety holds me back at times from finding relationships. Though the social anxiety isn’t that extreme to where every social encounter is a nightmare. Only the important encounters are.

What INFP needs in a partner Probably like organs.

“They feel like the connection at Starbucks with the barista is special” Cries at self because I *am* the barista at Starbucks

I just love those "space oddity" metaphors so much, I'm an INFP and I feel extremely associated with this song

I'm an INFP and my boyfriend is an INTJ It's really interesting how we function together. It's like we get along too well lol. Like we both need out alone times when we need it. It's like we have a really deep understanding of each other. He keeps me grounded for sure.

FJ: - Says infps are (probably) the most unique - Carefully explains what goes on in our minds - Keeps quoting David Bowie for the whole video I want to hug you so badly right now 😁

But when we find that someone. We don't even have guts to talk to them and just freak out. Not just partner. But even a friend. 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

I don't know man, as an INFP, being reserved, and not liking people being full of themselves, I really deeply appreciated the first few seconds where you say we're the most unique people. It makes me proud and happy and recognised

The thing is We love to share a deep connection with people And whenever we share something to them We want them to value what we said because it took us a lot of courage to open up And also because it means that we are comfortable with them

...you guys are getting partners?!!

Me, an INFP: I need to recharge and be alone for a little while. The rest of the world: Oh, okay. We are not friends anymore. BYE!

Hello!! I am an ENFJ who has just befriended an INFP. Honestly this video gave me so much to consider in supporting this friend and I can’t wait to see what life has in store for us!

I'M SO GLAD I found your channel. I can usually only listen to content. Yours - I have to watch! 😂😂😂

I feel personally attacked but it is true. As an INFP I would rather spend time in my thoughts and building deep connections with people or nothing at all. It's really hard to get out of my own bubble and I usually need another person to help me with socializing. From my experience INFJ's and ISFP's have always been the people I turn to.

Being an INFP, for some reason I feel free-er when I'm traveling out of the country. It's that feeling that no one knows who I am, have no cultural expectations from me other than politeness and respect, most probably not related to anyone I know. It's the lightness and I always feel less awkward when locals started conversations with me. I prefer being on my own during travels, but I don't feel as awkward then.

As an ENFP this is somewhat funny to listen to. Its kind of like: Hey, that's relatable only... ever so slightly really different.

Exploring, adventure, someone to challenge them to grow. I emphasize that! I often get a sense that people think that INFPs need somebody to just babysit them and tame their silly fairytale mind but actually (at least for me and at this point in life) we need someone who encourages us to live our life weirdly irl and not to settle for our imagination.

As an INFP someone telling me to "get over something" is one of my biggest pet peeves. Even if I was about to get over that thing anyways, I'll immediately start the "getting over it" process all over again and be upset again but even more this time and also at you😀😂

as an INFP i just want to sit in my room all day reading, watching movies and creating my own imaginary world

Every sentence he said is so true and I’m so fascinated by the thought that so many people who are INFP are as same as me wow this feels amazing and I don’t feel lonely and this makes me strong and feel understood

I'm and INTJ and my sister is an INFP. We are adults now, but I still visit and sometime we don't talk. We will just hang out in silence, and then out of nowhere we are talking about some super deep subject like two crazy people. Hahaha!

"INFPs let the practical day to day things pile up until they're overwhelmed" Well....you didn't need to insult me to get your point across 😑😂

"they feel like their connection with the barista at Starbucks is special" hits hard. and now i feel embarrassed bcs if my INTP ex-colleague doesn't miss me as much as i miss him.. this is very bad and i might have to yeet myself from existence bcs of the letter i wrote to him when he left

I’m gonna show this to my partner, just to show him, that I am not the only one who is like this. We’re together for 10 years now, but I think him seeing this video when we started dating would have helped a lot, because he didn’t get the shutdown things I do every once in a while and it left him upset, because he felt rejected. We talked a lot about what we need in our relationship and he understands me now very well. But it was complicated for a while. I wish I could have just sent this video back then. 😁

I love all the "Space Oddity" quotes!

is it weird that I fell in love with him in the first 5 minutes just because he understands me so much /infp struggle

FJ: INFP really care about what everyone else thinks about them, more so than is typical. Suggestion pops up: Are INFPs dumb? Me: is FJ trolling us?

I've tested as INFP for 25 years, retaking the test every few. I used to say I was always bored but after years of personal work now I can say I'm always happy but the consistency is still there. My favorite people are chaotic in a good way, they're exciting and help me do more things beyond staying at home.

I have learned so much about myself since my divorce. I discovered that I am an INFP and it is has been so eye-opening! And painful. As an INFP it is hard to be alone. But INFPs are good at being alone!

INFP female here with an ENTJ husband. He does all these things. When we did the MBTI test for him it showed he was like 51/49 in the extroverted/introverted spectrum. He helps me get out and keep up my relationships with friends but also understands that I don't like party situations as much as he does so I usually tell him when I want to leave and he let's everyone know we're leaving so I dont have to. He doesn't necessarily understand my emotions but he knows he doesn't understand it and will listen to me anyways. He also helps me take my fantasy life in my head and apply it to real life. He showed me I dont have to be overwhelmed by my emotions all the time and I showed him that he doesn't have to push all his emotions away.

"a commercial to those of us who don't have premium" quality content

I grew up as an INFP and my best friend, an ESFJ, took me under his wing to socialize me at 14 years old. The next year I became one of the most popular kids in my school, got the lead part in the school play, etc. But it was a bit too much mainly because I didn’t really value superficial friends. I was only interested in close intimate friends, so I sabotaged my popularity in one quick swoop and only maintained my closest friendships. Fast forward, I did mirror therapy in my 20s which set the foundation for becoming a fearless social butterfly. I made a video about what I did, and it’s on my channel, called How to Love Yourself. I found everything you said in this video spot on. Great job 👍

Love the Space Oddity references lol. Great video, thank you!

The thing about INFPs are we’re not normal. And we don’t want to be. We try to stray as far as the norm as possible. We are also very private, that’s why we don’t talk about what’s going on in our minds.

I think my spaceship knows which way to go, but I do appreciate the added guidance from you. 😊

I am an INFP and my partner is a traveling performer. He is very sensitive to my feels and randomly says sweet things that means so much. This is all accurate, he fills most of these needs.

All your references to Space Oddity crack me up. I cover that song, which may be odd for a woman, but then INFPs are a bit odd, I guess.

Is it my imagination, or do all of us INFPs look a little bit alike? Like we share some kind of ancient bloodline? Or am I just sounding really INFP?

I like connecting on a deep level and I can't be with someone who brushes things off that are important to me or invalidates my feelings. I also don't want lukewarm love, because I love so deeply, I want my partner to mirror that.

i like it when a person appreciate that I'm a good listener but i can get very hurt when i FINALLY tell them something personal and they don't do the same for me. It already takes A LOT for me to tell them a struggle or emotion I've been dealing with and if they are not focused on the thing I'm trying to tell them or if they are putting words or feelings in my mouth i immediately can feel very offended or feel totally misunderstood. When i was younger I came to realize that i sometimes if not most of the time, finish their lines when they where trying to express themself. I did exactly that, that what i hated when people did this to me. so I always have to hold myself back when people are describing their own feelings to me and i actually already know what and can explain it better in detail and words than they can themself, haha. In some situations it can be helpful to them but sometimes it's better just to let them express it themself in their own words than to always finish and describe it for them. There even was a point in the past when they started to call me Dr.Phill... back then, I really could not see the yoke or compliment.. hahaha to compare me with Dr.Phill, tsss what where they thinking!! hahaha I really hate it when someone tries to describe my personality, and it can be extra hurtful if they have known me for some time and are wrong about even the SMALLEST thing when they describe me, even if it is a positive description, because i am so true to myself and what i stand for. this faulty description they have given of me can stay with me for a long time and i can really drown in all kinds of reasons why and how they are so far off and if i did something that made them think in a certain way. I used to struggle when people try to give me some good advise or try to tell me how to handle certain things. not because i thought that their advise was stupid or that i felt to good to listen to anything they had to say, but more because the advise they had given me, i already thought of and a thousand other ways and solutions. the problem was/is to actually handle and do the solutions you come up with for yourself. i did appreciate their opinion though, but probably was more looking for someone to just listen than give me solutions even if given within all the goodness of their hart. It is kinda funny when i hear things as "an INFP is very stubborn" because that's one thing i'm actually kind of proud of. You can try to say everything you want to get me to change me mind, but when the answer is no.. it will most likely stay 'NO' haha A lot of my youth friends had a hard time accepting this because the average person will probably give in when presented with something positive... but stubborn young me wouldn't change his mind even if offered money. It was not to prove my point or whatever.. but more because the answer i had given them was well overthought or had, for me personal, a meaning. The friends that known me for this and (sort of) accepted this from me, are still my friends till this day 25yrs later. I appreciate their friendship everyday. if i have the chance to talk to my younger self growing up, it would probably tell myself: that sometimes it's better to let people know when something is bothering me than to just assume they will know because i'm acting different. Always be careful of who you open up to. Don't assume everybody has a kind and loving character by nature just because you can't wrap your head around the How and Why some of the evil and selfish things people do just out of greed or to gain something small for themself. Oh, and i would kick my behind, to start do a little more and dream a little less

Love the Space Oddity - David Bowie reference, and, if I may, the subtle judgement it relates regarding the INFP type. My ex was INFP and I’m *probably* INFJ, and I agree with the content of this video. Just wanted to shout out the really interesting take on the song.

"they feel like the connection with the barista at starbucks is special" me: has fond feelings towards people i don't even know and spent like 10 mins in a gaming lobby together no, i don't feel called out at all. why do you ask?

One of the few friends in my life is an INFP, and I have a brother that is an INFP too. In my experience, they have very high moral/ethical principles but, at the same time, they are very concerned about the welfare of others. Because they fear that their words will hurt or offend, they tend to keep their complaints about people/the world to themselves, which then get all bottled up inside. You can't stifle the complaining voice in yourself without also stifling the loving voice in yourself, so unfortunately the bottling up of so-called negative feelings by the INFP causes them to have more difficulty in expressing their loving feelings - which they have A LOT of. What they need is someone who can let the INFP get on their soap box for a bit and listen to their criticisms of people or the world - without being personally offended or hurt by their rant. A good friend is someone who will genuinely listen to the INFP's complaints and see it as a beautiful expression of the INFP's inner strength and ethical principles.

As an INFP I subscribed to your channel just for the fact that you told an advertisement was on its way. İt made me laugh like 50 minutes only in 2 seconds. A part of me will keep laughing about it quietely in my brain for a year at least. Thanks man.