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What the New Zealand Air Force Don't Want You to Know - Javier Jarquin 

ThisJavier
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Comedian Javier Jarquin talks about why New Zealand is ripe for the taking. Including a true story about the New Zealand Air Force

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27 апр 2020

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Комментарии : 100   
@nukutauruaraihania2857
@nukutauruaraihania2857 3 года назад
It's a big flex when you take a bag of lolly jets to an airforce base a knowing you have more jets then them
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
😂😂😂😂
@planespotter4494
@planespotter4494 2 года назад
What did they call jet plane lollies before World War 2? Ducks Feet
@JackKrivan
@JackKrivan 11 месяцев назад
Lol true
@user-ii1iy8fz1d
@user-ii1iy8fz1d Месяц назад
❤😂
@sreddy250
@sreddy250 3 года назад
Can't understand why this guy isn't more famous yet, he's fucking hilarious! 😂🤣
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
Come on, FAME!
@NoYoutubeName1
@NoYoutubeName1 10 месяцев назад
Wdym? His other channels, Filthy Frank and Joji are massive
@sreddy250
@sreddy250 Год назад
I'm just cracking up, imagining Jacinda Adern running down the beach and yelling 'F*ck off!' It would seem so out of character! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier Год назад
Well, technically not anymore but I get you 🤣
@sreddy250
@sreddy250 Год назад
@ThisJavier I couldn't remember the new bloke's name, I was just laughing my arse off at the mental image of the very lovely and sedate Jacinda Ardern running down a beach and yelling 'F*ck off!' at the sea... 😀 🤣🤣🤣
@argustuft2394
@argustuft2394 3 года назад
The NZ Air Force logo is a flightless bird? That was another great idea from Col. Monty Python.
@edenbeechey2037
@edenbeechey2037 8 месяцев назад
And the RAAF logo is a kangaroo?? When have you seen a kangaroo flying apart from when its punted by a hilux doing 100kmh?
@argustuft2394
@argustuft2394 8 месяцев назад
The last time anyone saw a New Zealand military aircraft or naval vessel?@@edenbeechey2037
@amsuther
@amsuther 5 месяцев назад
@@edenbeechey2037 still jumps further than than a kiwi can fly...!
@hokulea8655
@hokulea8655 2 года назад
It always amuses my heart when i hear how much truth comes out of comedians lol bravo😎👏👏👏
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 2 года назад
thanks! the kid from the story actually got in touch with me after he saw this and we had a good laugh remembering it.
@-MaBallz
@-MaBallz 3 года назад
Your at school and your friend pulls out an Apple Me: EVERY BODY GET DOWN HE’S GOT AN APPLE. Teacher: call the Air Force oh wait there’s no Air Force.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
@scootergrant8683
@scootergrant8683 2 года назад
**cough** transport force **cough**
@williamroberts8470
@williamroberts8470 3 года назад
I found this searching for CAC Boomerang. I'm satisfied.
@tomraw4893
@tomraw4893 3 года назад
One look at Helen Clark would cause the most fierce enemy to turn tail and flee.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
and I thought MY jokes were old.
@ericbleasel5907
@ericbleasel5907 3 года назад
Leave her alone,how would you feel eating barbed wire for breakfast every morning the poor thing?
@Gman290a
@Gman290a 4 года назад
Very funny!! Took me back a few years! Cheers.
@michaelmisczuk1188
@michaelmisczuk1188 7 месяцев назад
Great, funny bit. I knew there'd be trouble when the word "apple" was said.
@linuskarlsson9449
@linuskarlsson9449 4 года назад
How are we gonna defeat the New Zealand Air Force? Just use does apples!
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
Nooooo! It's our achilles heel!
@stealthtomcat4739
@stealthtomcat4739 3 года назад
@@ThisJavier New Zealand should at least buy air defense systems like S-400 if not fighter planes
@amsuther
@amsuther 5 месяцев назад
@@ThisJavier Granny Smiths..locked and loaded...!
@22_ice_isaac85
@22_ice_isaac85 3 года назад
It’s strategically impossible to attack NZ with out a country having aircraft carriers
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
I wonder if anyone has seriously thought that far
@22_ice_isaac85
@22_ice_isaac85 3 года назад
@@ThisJavier I mean our biggest threat is Indonesia or China and they would most likely cross Australian waters first to get to NZLD waters so that would mean that it’s actually Australia’s problem first witch also means that AUS, USA would go to war with China and then because NZLD isn’t really suposed to be a combat military they would most likely be sent to provide humanitarian aid to small islands that would be attacked during China or Indonesia’s “killing spree” or NZ would go directly into the battle as there very close allies with AUS and the USA anyways. But I highly doubt any country like Indonesia or China would have the balls to attack anyone because that means it would be them VS the world and I definitely wouldn’t wanna be the world cause that’s a lot of man power and weapons hammering one country it would probably be a simmiler situation to WW2 where Germany goal was to take the whole of Europe but they didn’t take actual Britain witch in this case would be NZ and AUSTRALIA but either way it should be fine and I also have some family members in the NZ army who told me that NZ has just got a 20 billion dollar plan for some new RNZAF ( royal New Zealand Air Force) planes but I’m pretty sure those are just a bunch of Transport planes but either way there’s nothing to worry about
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
@@22_ice_isaac85 Was NOT expecting this comment when I posted this video.
@shermanator87
@shermanator87 3 года назад
It's not like an enemy would ever think to sail an armada far out to see and then tack back towards the east coast of NZ.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
@@shermanator87 what would they go out so far to see?
@imbetterthanyouis
@imbetterthanyouis 5 месяцев назад
at least the kiwis half paid attention to the assignment , sure its flightless but its still a bird , we got a cranky mutant rat that can jump really well for ours , but seriously it was a massive shame what happened to the rnzaf strike wing , back when they existed they were one of the best strike units on the planet and they were doing it in 50s era jets sometimes against f 16s and f15s and more often than not magically appear over the target on exercises leaving the yanks scratching their heads going where the effing hell did they come from ,,,,, such a shame
@user-ii1iy8fz1d
@user-ii1iy8fz1d Месяц назад
❤😂
@josephnatana5305
@josephnatana5305 3 года назад
Yep. I never did like not having an Airwing. We had a strong Airway as with all NZ Military.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
Since this video has been posted I've heard that all NZ Aircraft have been apple-proofed.
@regregan6852
@regregan6852 8 месяцев назад
Sure
@stealthtomcat4739
@stealthtomcat4739 3 года назад
It means nobody can become a fighter pilot in New Zealand
@tomraw4893
@tomraw4893 3 года назад
That's right. Nobody at all. It's too violent an occupation for a pacifist prime minister to contemplate.
@stealthtomcat4739
@stealthtomcat4739 3 года назад
@@tomraw4893 It's okay to not have fighter planes but at least air defense systems like S-400 should be there.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
@@stealthtomcat4739 Nah mate, we're good. We got apples.
@stealthtomcat4739
@stealthtomcat4739 3 года назад
@@ThisJavier Yeah haha
@davidgreen9342
@davidgreen9342 5 месяцев назад
Ya they have P-8A and also getting the FA-18.
@BettyBettyBoBetty
@BettyBettyBoBetty 3 месяца назад
actually your not
@IC3XR
@IC3XR 6 месяцев назад
Australia has ya covered
@geoffh784
@geoffh784 3 месяца назад
Australia's combat jets don't have the range to fly to New Zealand without in-air refueling by tanker (which Australia has). But even with refueling they won't have much mission time over New Zealand. Realistically a single air craft carrier could sorty enough fast jets to keep the Aussie airforce mostly out of the picture (at NZ ie). You'd need a US carrier group to rescue you...
@IC3XR
@IC3XR 3 месяца назад
@@geoffh784 by the time an enemy had a carrier group stationed near New Zealand, multiple radar stations and 5EYES satellites would know about it - ergo, Australia or the U.S would have plenty of time to base F-35s at pre-existing airfields in NZ. No air-refuelling needed. Australia has ya covered.
@tedheath9018
@tedheath9018 3 дня назад
The Iroquois engine has fine wire screens on the engine intake then a particle removing system where the air is routed 180 degrees and and any debris goes straight ahead and dumped so your apple story is bs.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier День назад
I don't know what to tell you Ted. He threw the apple and then they were poking round the engine for a long time.
@P0L2109
@P0L2109 3 года назад
even deadlier than a nuke watermelon might not look like much but it can level auckland
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
omg. don't get Aucklanders started on avocado toast.
@eoinj3929
@eoinj3929 4 месяца назад
Ireland is the same , no jets !
@1tnt833
@1tnt833 3 года назад
Hmmm really??? Wowww....well I guess they will be the first to be taken over then in any given situation...its incredible they dont have any viable defence
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
Our defence is our nice image. I mean, what kind of bully would try and take us over??
@da22070
@da22070 9 дней назад
Luckily most nternar
@axel665
@axel665 3 года назад
Wait isn't the new Zealand the country which invented Bob sample tank
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
Oh yes. I forgot about that 80 year old tank design made out of bits of shed. We're completely safe. Carry on!
@amsuther
@amsuther 2 месяца назад
hate to break it to ya... Bob Semple was an Aussie too... ;-)
@classtilton871
@classtilton871 Месяц назад
Honestly i almost joined the nz air force, but the fact that i dont want to fly helicopters or a boeing means it aint for me 😂
@jaredholley3937
@jaredholley3937 3 месяца назад
Shaun Holbrook is my actual buddy. I know this to be real fact. Shaun. 😅
@1tnt833
@1tnt833 3 года назад
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 funny comedian tho
@kathrynmolesa1641
@kathrynmolesa1641 7 месяцев назад
Funny guy
@calpurniabruchi5742
@calpurniabruchi5742 Год назад
Do you have a gun? Yes we have one but the New Zealand Army has it.
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier Год назад
I'm stealing this 👏
@nickthx1138
@nickthx1138 10 месяцев назад
So true! NZ get yr jets back!
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 10 месяцев назад
We spent all our money on the All Blacks 😭
@nickthx1138
@nickthx1138 10 месяцев назад
@@ThisJavier 😂😂😂 And with that result against SA!
@teokoitutaoro7850
@teokoitutaoro7850 7 месяцев назад
Funny bastards😂😂😂
@cnrspiller3549
@cnrspiller3549 7 месяцев назад
Hilarious
@richardchatfield5984
@richardchatfield5984 3 года назад
Its not a bird its a marsupial 🦘 🐰🦖
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 3 года назад
What are you talking about?
@you7253
@you7253 2 года назад
Haha,
@stedmansolomona7569
@stedmansolomona7569 Год назад
🫣😂
@joethebro9281
@joethebro9281 4 года назад
I am 14 years old born in New Zealand and the New Zealand Military is not able to provide a decent enough salary to live on and there is servere budget cuts causing new zealand troops to be unhappy with their jobs because of how inactive and useless they feel and their service isn’t even appreciated by the military, government and country.I would much rather serve in the US military which would be able to offer me a job in which my contribution and service is appreciated and the US military actually has the funding and morale to do their job properly.I would also love to live in the USA which is one of my main reasons and I feel It would be better if I earnt my way into the US via military service and become an American. 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
@Michael-eh9hy
@Michael-eh9hy 3 года назад
How do you plan on getting a green card? I am also from New Zealand thinking about joining US military.
@binnah6656
@binnah6656 3 года назад
The salary for RNZDF is alg idk what ur talking about?
@allgood6760
@allgood6760 Год назад
Yo u can blame the half man half woman Helen Clark for getting rid of our Strike Wing... our flyers got out and went across the ditch ✈️🇳🇿
@jamiesaunders1819
@jamiesaunders1819 8 месяцев назад
Because Australia has been taking as a joke...they basically subsidies N.Z in expats getting decent wages and paying for there defence...Than want too go off about there rugby team...guys grow up develop an economy and defend yourselves..
@ThisJavier
@ThisJavier 8 месяцев назад
I'd like to subsidise some English classes for you.
@SimonM5
@SimonM5 7 месяцев назад
​@@ThisJavier😂
@patrickgragg5602
@patrickgragg5602 7 месяцев назад
I WAS UNAWARE N.Z. EVEN HAS AN AIR FORCE, THOSE CANDY ASSES DISALLOWED OUR NAVY TO PORT WITH NUKES ON THE BOARD!
@vernonhurley1300
@vernonhurley1300 7 месяцев назад
Yes you do. You count on Americans just like the rest of the free world. So respect us thank you.
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