What women DON'T GET about the men they love 

When I worked as a teacher I realized very quickly that boys and girls are motivated very differently. The boys needed a challenge to rise to. The best way to turn around a misbehaving boy is to give him a meaningful task. And then appreciate his efforts. The girls on the other hand want to be praised and admired. Most of them behave already, so little prizes and kind words are enough to keep them feeling great. The girls naturally police each other and are more cooperation oriented. It’s tricky running both strategies in the same classroom. but if you can pull it off it’s wonderful.

my gosh this made me cry like a baby because I realized how I make my husband feel like a nothing when in fact he is my everything.... thank you for helping me to understand and now I will go tell him how much I need him ... wow.

When a human being is treated as if they were nothing by someone important to them, particularly in childhood, they will feel as though they are nothing. Talk to women who had been neglected in childhood and really listen to them. This experience is not unique to men, we all share it.

My dad treated me like I was nothing and now as an adult I can't shake the emotional belief that it's true, even though I can rationally offer counterarguments to that deeply seated feeling.

As an adult living man (non-religious), this 'monologue' moved me to many tears. For so many years I struggled to understand 'why' I felt like an empty void inside. Hearing the words structured this way has allowed me to release a lot of that 'yuck'. My inner light just got a bit brighter 🙏 Thank you so very much for posting this.

Men rate women’s looks on a scale of 1-10. How’s that for feeling judged, and like nothing. It works both ways.

110%. My biggest fear is rejection. Not being needed or useful. Ask me what i want i mostly have no idea. However, I have an absolute amazing wife who treats me as an equal and vice versa. You can have the happiest relationship and still have this feeling is where i am getting at.

As a woman, I have been depressed and in very dark places. However, I never felt like nothing. And yes, my reaction to rejection is more like 'how come' as he says. I am not even vain, not at all. I just kind of know that if I have emotions or even problems, it is because I am definitely SOMETHING ❤ God is great

It took me a long time to figure this out, the male ego. But there is one point I would disagree on-it wasn't solely the feminism movement that made some of us independent. My ex husband made me feel like I had to do things on my own to prove my worth. For 10 years, that's what I've been doing. 3 years of marriage set me up for years of failure at relationships.

Thank you, Rabbi. I have sobbed through most of this teaching. I had no idea what I have been doing to my husband and All men in my life except my Daddy. I adored him even knowing his imperfections.

Brilliant conversation. Thank you. ....we women will always need our men. ❤️ 🙏 ❤️

Im a wonan, I work in osychistry. My experience with victims of all sorts of abuse, men and women do experience feelings of nothingness. They become comolitely crushed, thats why many stay. Im very much a woman and Ive very much have felt like nothing, so much so that I felt like a minus, burdening the world and spendt a long time in very dark places.

I suffered a lot in childhood and i definitely felt at "zero" through most of it. My experiences in school and at home - the neglect, alienation, humiliation (the humiliation was entirely from adult women aka school teachers) left me feeling completely worthless, completely. I did not relate to other girls at all. When it comes to feelings ...It wasnt the women around me who spoke honestly and sincerely about their feelings - oh they talked A LOT, but it was all glib, insincere talk. I learned to understand, not be ashamed of, and talk about my emotions from an unlikely place. It was the year 2000 (i was 10) when i discovered rock music (the bands i resonated with were all male bands) and it was men screaming about their emotions and i felt soooo validated for the first time in my life. Mind you, at the time i didnt have the analytical abilities to note and make something out of this fact , i honestly didnt really consciously note "oh hey all these bands im listening to are male", i just thought of them as awesome HUMANS who were validating my emotions and i felt empowered. What im saying is two-fold -- its incorrect to think as society thinks that women are more emotional...some of the greatest love songs and poetry were written by men; and to the Rabbi's point that women dont feel like zero, i can assure you some of us have felt that way.

All of the above applies to women just as much. Women are also very sensitive to criticism. Let’s normalise not treating men like children. Women are just as much sensitive.

This has been such an interesting analysis and I can honestly admit that I probably discouraged so many men/boys when I expressed how childish and/or immature they were when they couldn't handle "constructive" criticism. I also find it extremely tiring to "baby" big old men... but now I understand better why they behave that way. I will be more sensitive to my choice of words and expressions going forward. Thanks for sharing.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING YOUR WISDOM ♥️♥️♥️

My husband agrees with all of this. I'm never knew any of it. Now I do, and will adjust accordingly.

Actually I needed a man, I dont believe in feminism, but unfortunately my husband left me in a position where I have to find something to do in order to support my self at least.. Hello from Lebanon, I am a muslim. He also took away the kids from me, I see them but it’s not the life I wanted. 💔

But our Creator lives inside of us ❤ No one is nothing and never could be

That was awsome! You really gave me a huge piece of advice, as I am a single mother of a son, hows father disappeared. And I never had a father myself. The only way I see men as fathers, is like from the outside, through a window. Admiring it, but not really able to get it. You are great, thank you 🥰

I've listened to so many of Rabbi Manis Friedman's teachings and this is by far one of his most beautiful and insightful of lectures!

So glad I ran across this information. We’ve been married 5 years and I don’t want my husband to lose the swagger confidence that I find so attractive. Doesn’t Torah say the woman is to help to provide a calm loving home for the man?!

Here is the compliment for Rabbi. You're very wise and kind man. You enlighten our life with your wisdom. It's been years that me and my husband listen your talks, and I feel like we've became better people. Thank you very much for that, and may God bless you and your family!

Men need to realize these things and be conscious of changing that mindset. Its really not healthy. It destroys relationships, all their relationships except with other men perhaps. So it ends up coming out as small minded and selfish. Also Running women down for handling our emotions differently like they dont have any. But they are there. They have them. And hiding them away in a box is not healthy

If you feel as though you are nothing, remember that you were created in G-d's image, and use that awareness to fuel your self-esteem. Looking for other people in the world to make you feel like something will usually end in disaster.

I knew we couldn't make to the end of a video about men without bringing up feminism. But after all - I think that's the dirty truth that explains why feminism is so hated by men (and some women as well). It reveals the truth of men's deepest fears -that women don't really need them, and a lot of that "need" was manufactured by social oppression in order for men to avoid dealing with this primal fear. And a lot of other women are also in the business of protecting men from this fear, which is part of the reason why so many women also reject feminism. They prioritize protecting the feelings of the men in their lives over the rights of women and girls globally. I'm not trying to be mean to men by saying any of this - but I do believe that it's true. Nothing else but the most primal of all fears could explain the vitriol that gets directed at feminism.

Thank you! I'm happy to hear your lessons. It is amaizing how your words effects my life.

As a man you're a social construct, but on a deeper level you're divine being, as is women.everything and nothing at the same time, fulness of creation . May you be graced to live this experience and knowledge in this lifetime 🙏

This is such a funny but truthful way to understand how men think, it’s a nice way to fill in the gap of what it’s like for you guys

Thank you Rabbi Friedman!! ✡️🙏♥️🔥 Wish you and everybody here a wonderful Wednesday!! 💪🙂👍

Rabbi, you are so right. Our minds and egos are so powerful in self-preservation. Ironically, God tells us that we are dust. So, what’s the problem with being nothing, we are.

When a man steps up and recognizes his innate worth to this realm in love and balanced energy he will open his arms to many in suppport. When we are strong, nurtured and supported we give Our ALL. It is how we are made. The challenge is to find this balance within ones self and not seek the validation, permission or praise for accomplishment. The differences in wiring are true and real, yet we must overcome this and find it within ourselves. Blessings to ALL.

I never wanted to get married or have kids. I have watched a few of his videos about men and they have solidify my decision not too. Dealing with guys seems to be worse than dealing with kids. Guys require WAY too much energy. Now I see why married women always look so drained and old. Its like the guys suck the life out of them.

Feminism started to give women rights, right to vote, right to own property, a right to have the key to the mailbox, a right to speak at their own Dr's appointment and not have their husband speak for them, a right to have equal pay for equal work. And this is just the start of why equal rights were fought for. Women still need men and are always going to need them rather they realize it or not. Just because women have the rights they should have had all along does not mean they do not need men. I do understand what he is saying, men need to feel needed and appreciated and not put down.

Thank you for this reminder that sometimes I need to zip it. I learn so much from your wisdom. Appreciate u sharing.

I understand bc I often feel like I'm nothing and I'm a woman

But we do need them. We all know deep down that we can not exist without them. we NEED them - and being made to feel ‘needy’ and pathetic and less than ‘nothing’ for that, an imposition, a burden, etc., especially by the man you need the most, is the fastest way to destroy a woman. this is the deepest knowing that every woman has that men can not understand. This is why feminism was born. Not because we don’t need men, but because we do - and that has become increasingly painful and dangerous, for us.

I have to say I’m that I’m not Jewish I am Roman Catholic but I really enjoy and take to heart all that is said in these talks, I love hearing your wisdom and you have taught me so much. 💕 Thank You for sharing your wisdom.

Rabbi, that is genius. Thank God for Him gifting you to see all of these foundational differences. Thank you for living a holy life so that He can impart that into your inner being. And thank you for taking the time to explain it and put it onto RU-vid.

I don't lose sleep over the possibility of being nothing. That's more than enough material for God to worth with.

My wife said the funniest thing the other day. I was showing her one of Rabbi Friedman's videos and she rolled her eyes and said "oh great and he talks about how bad women are " 😂😂😂 I said I don't remember the Rabbi ever saying anything bad about women. I explained to her about one video where you spoke about Eve and from what I took from it that Eve was the one that remembered why they were here and what they were meant to do. "Not a quote of the Rabbi "

How true rabbi ! My mother RIP had that very bad habit ! I think it was her own self esteem to say very sad !

Ungodly. We are made in the image of All Mighty God, formed by his will from the dust he created. The Image of God, is that not awesome? Ladies you were made as a help mate to man and without you we miss out on one of God's most wonderful, caring and loving creations ever. A mother's love is never forgotten.

If only you would not have ended it with "you really don't need us", I would be sharing this. God created man and woman. To complement each other. In order to be a mother, a woman needs a man. To have a functional family, as God designed it, it needs a father, a mother, and at least one child. For the rest of the video, I thank you. It is fantastic. So much order and sense. And as a Catholic man, I ask God to bless you, protect you, and always guide you.

Once again, genius shiur from Rabbi Friedman. Thanks

I desperately want to die. I'm in hell with no escape. 44 years of suffering with only intermittent fleeting windows of relief. I beg to die. HE REPLACED ME. HE SHATTERED MY HEART. I loved him. He raped my soul: brutally viciously violently maliciously. Every night: nightmares. Every day: panic attacks. Every morning I wake up in despair, desperately praying to die. I can no longer bear the pain. I could die from the pain of missing my best friend. He betrayed and abandoned me, discarded me like garbage. I'm so fucking traumatized and terrorized and terrified. God, as I walk through this hell and heartache and grief, I pray you guide me and direct me and hold me and love me and heal me... AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER: I'm in love. In love with a special person, in love with myself, in love with life, in love with God, in love with all that I AM, in love with all that is. I love life. I've spent my whole life in a suicidal hell, and that's all permanently shifting NOW. I pray I stay on this trajectory of MILLIONS of miracles, forever!

So much wisdom🙏

Thank you

I wonder maybe this is why many men are serial killers, users and abusers, sex addicts, drug addicts etc; When you feel like you're nothing, it's like being in a bottomless pit, nothing but low vibrational energy and that's when darkness starts to seep in, and people like this tend to do things to fill that void. Anyone that's going through this, I wish you nothing but healing.

@1:25 : best response healthy and acknowledging those laughing in the audience. I will listen to the end an subscribe to all of your videos. You seem to hit accurate so far (@3:05) and they laugh at that too. Quite sad. I pray those laughing get the power of God upon them and that they are never the same 🙏🏽🌺

I do thank and compliment my husband as often as possible. But he gets very focused on his own projects and I am left to do most things like replacing light bulbs myself. If it seems I don't "need" him, it's out of being left on my own to get things done. Still, good insight into the male perpective.

Bravo! Such wonderful wisdom.

Very interesting, However i am a woman and felt like nothing in my life. Not because close to one's to me have made me feel like that. But because of philosophical thoughts on life at a young age, and bullying that girls do... But good is the creator and he did not create anything for nothing... So that is why i am something.

That is why both men and women should strive to get away from their ego based, society - conditioned roles. Both genders are divine beings on a deeper level, both come from ultimate source. The one who read this, may you realize and feel that you are fulness of creation,no matter woman or man❤

APPRECIATION..GOES A LONG WAY for a Man/ MEN

I enjoy your Insight 💯 Thank you

I so enjoyed your wisdom with a light humor...Thank you

Soul deep and scintillating. Psychology + spiritualality ... good for your mind, spirit, and soul.

What a great video. Truly life changing. Thank you so much.

I made eggs more than you know. I produce them fast and you can help me get more eggs from the barn so we can enjoy them togetger. You are useful and special.

The point of Criticism constructive criticism is to encourage men to grow and improve.

Woman are the same way. If a man treats a woman like they are nothing they also will think bas of themselves. Men usually love themselves.

U are right rabbi !

😊❤ amazing teaching and insight. Thank you!!

From Adam's Ashen rib. Indian Prana is when Andy spits out fire for a full day. I dodged the motion and projectile.

I recently lost my partner to cancer. I cared for her for months before she went to hospital. Did everything I could before she died. I feel so devalued since her passing. Men without a task really do feel devalued. The burning light within me has been extinguished.

Wow - WISDOM Ladies. Been saying for yrs - 'Ladies, You say You don't need a Man. And THATS why You don't have one.' One of the first things God did was realize Man needed Someone to talk to, to Live with and share Life, and to multiply with ON HIS LEVEL. Women were created from a part of Man. She's His MISSING part. Think about that...GREAT GREAT TALK - THANK YOU RABBI FRIEDMAN!!!!

My grandmother told me you will never be beautiful so you better be interesting. Words to live by

What men DON'T GET about the women they love THATS WHAT WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT OK???????

I have been watching your talks on RU-vid for a while. I disagree with much of what you say, but there are gems of Jewish wisdom. As a retired psychologist, I have to say that I vehemently disagree with you. I have taken courses at Chabad, and benefited from them, and I usually listen to your talks when I see them pop up on my RU-vid feed.

Thank you rabbi !

I love correction because it helps me grow. There is a difference between correction and ctiticism.

😅 love this, thanks for sharing

This was amazing 😮

This is everything

Excellent commentary 📚

We still need men.. you are not ever nothing ❤

this might have been the best thing i have heard

This doesn't apply to everyone. I'm a female who's been told I'm nothing my entire life. I've been reduced to a zero before I ever made it to 1, muchless 10

I love him!❤ Great insight!

You can't undo a creative condition. You are right, you can't. However, God did not create them with fear. He created them both in Love. They felt no fear until they ate of the tree... That awakened knowledge/awareness without Wisdom/understanding. Knowledge without understanding is what causes fear in anyone's heart Male or Female. You "know" something is in the dark woods you are walking next to. You "know" it is following along side you. But there is no understanding because you don't "know" what "it" is. Your mind is screaming, "Bear! Mountain Lion!GAAAAH!!!" Then you get to a steet light and out comes a stray dog. 🤷‍♀️ And immediately you understand from previously gained Wisdom that this dog is seeking your help, not to make a meal out of you. The whole time you can't "see" the whole picture your imagination is attempting to fill in the blanks... Fear is very real, and triggers certain physical responses such as an adrenaline rush to flee if necessary. It's not just our emotions that are affected by the fealing of fear, its our whole body system... Which is wired with physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects that all need to be in balance to work properly. To function as we were created to function. I understand that you believe the fear of annihilation is exclusive to men, but it's not. I have experienced things in my life that I can no longer even put into words, and spent a good majority of my early years living in a constant state of fear. The emotions are driven by feelings. So if someone feels afraid, their emotional reaction will be triggered based from the bank of either Wisdom or hurt. It truly feels to me like each one of us have a well of both inside of us. And we can draw from either one with any circumstance we face. If we draw from our hurt, our emotional and physical reaction will be a reaction of hurt. But if we draw from our Wisdom, it will direct a response of understanding. Leading to what you said... The thing that you hate, don't do to others. It hurts my fealings when people talk over me, as in literally won't even let me finish a sentence. And this has been a consistent circumstance in my life for years now. So if I draw from my well of hurt, as I have done in the past, I am going to be angry, frustrated, and eventually just cut them off completely. That's not healthy for anyone. But if I draw from the well of Wisdom I have learned through my experiences I will instead feel compassion towards the one talking over me because we all want to be heard. I will not talk over them. I will let them be heard, and hope that someday they will at least feel heard by me. As a matter of fact I pretty much stopped talking almost completely several years ago and no one even noticed. I am pretty sure despite the internet, or perhaps even because of the internet... 🤔 That the majority of people do not feel heard. I want to be heard too. But no one can hear anything when everyone's talking... Because you can't talk and listen at the same time. These are emotional issues that we are dealing with. Not spiritual. The spiritual and physical are just out of balance because the emotions are out of balance. Therefore there is "dysfunction" that will not go away until the emotions are brought back into balance with the physical and spiritual. 🤷‍♀️

Wow this is so good!!!!! 🔥🔥🔥

Also people who has had serious child abouse except being a 0.

Men love to give each other put downs as play.

Apart from the wisdom and kindness, you are the far best comedian out there ❤🙏🏻☺️.. Thank you Rabbi 🙏🏻 for making my day so much better.

Awesome 👏

Yes I agree with everything the Rabbi says, but the man must realize he was created first and first is always first. And therefore although a woman may be an improvement, man is the original.

in the Beginning of the audiovisual Lesson, the ''Conception of Human'' was mentioned but, and it is exhausting to having and repeat this constantly, in ''Genesis'' Chapter 1 Verses 26-27 explains how the original human Being was made Male and Female simultaneaously, the neurophysiological System, Intellect, Rationality, and the cardiovascular System, Affectivity, Emotivity, and ''G.d the Absolute'', ''Elhim'' biblical , that is ''Elh'' in middle eastern Language and the Suffix ''-im'' for the ''dual Form'' equal to the ''Neuter'' in Latin, that is ''-um'', and indicates the Presence of both ''masculine and feminine Qualities simultaneously'' or none of them, and this indicates that the ''Name'' is a ''Whole'', is provided with ''Balance, Integrity'', made the Human as a perfect Representative of ''G.d the Absolute'' Itself, provided with masculine Qualities or Intellect of the Head, Brain, and with feminine Qualities or Affectivity of the Chest, Heart, as well as making the ''Human'' as a Couple, one generatively a ''Man, Male'' and the other generatively a ''Woman, Female'', that has to do with one's Womb, Gonads, while thereafter the ''minor Deity'' so named '4grammton'' forged a ''Fétiche'' as it is named in ''Kirikou et la Sorcière'' an Animation Movie by ''revolutionary, to restart and evolve'' Author Michel Ocelot, made of ''Ground and to which an 'Entity' was insufflated, cfr. these Entities as exposed in 'the Book of Medium' by 'Spiritualist', 'revolutionary', 'Allan Kardec', of some 160 Years ago'', and eventually in ''Genesis'' 6 it is clearly stated that ''the Infants of G.d the Absolute'', mix with the ''Infants of the Ground'', and they obviously generated a ''new Kind of human Being'', very material and very spiritual at the same Time, the one who is ''called to'' restore the World, repair the World, rescue the World, save the World, cfr. ''Salvation'' as ''Salve'' in Latin, ''Shlom'' in Ëbr, ''Slamah' in Ärb. ''Shlom'' to You and ''Strenght, Truth, also 'Vir' in Latin, 'Zkr' biblical, masculine, alchemically united to Good, also 'Gratia', 'Nqvh', feminine to generate Beauty'' to All.

Thank you.

THANK YOU

This is giving me a bit of panic. If a man can’t take any criticism, how is anyone supposed to have a relationship with one? I honestly have no idea what to do. Pretend they can do no wrong? That actually sounds like exactly what they wish.

Hmmm... Maybe that reminder serves to keep them humble and dependent on God and not self🙏

We, as men, have great aspirations. So, it is difficult for us to accept naive women. We always look for a great woman, and that means a healthy, wise, and communicative woman.

Terrific !

Think of it this way, how does G-d feel when he does not get praised by his creation. How does a husband feel when not praised by his wife. Humanity came from G-d, and Woman from man. G-d exalts the humble, so a man exalts his “virtuous wife.” So praise him to keep his morals alive husbands are not perfect like our Lord.

Have you thought that society puts the barrier so high for women and that is why women have the need to reach ‘ 10’? Things that women do are diminished and taken for granted like caring for other ie a child, elders etc which is hard work. The workload that we as women carry according to the society’s expectation crashes my heart. Feminism has saved women. Men if you feel like you are a 0 go to therapy to look inside and find what is the cause so you can fix it and we became a better place for the generations to come.

Wisdome

The masculine and the feminin balance the life

A man is only loved when he has something he can give. A man who doesn't have anything to give is reviled and cursed and treated like so much trash. And this is why many men choose to simply be alone with the creator and no one else.

I don't think feeling like nothing is strictly unique to men. Women have literally been treated like nothing for a very very long time and unfortunately women have eventually been convinced we are nothing by many religions. That's why real feminism is very important to remind us that we are extremely important. I believe that saying that only man can't be criticised is an excuse to say that women can be criticised and brought to nothing without any consequences. As an agnostic i've always felt that religions saying men were created by a higher being and then a woman from a man is just trying to lessen womens' importance by making it seem like men didn't come from women. Religion throws a role of a submissive, kind, quiet mother at women saying nothing else is good , then make it seem like in the begining it wasn't a woman who brought a man here. And then make every sort of excuse to "justify" men badly treating women. To me, from what you said, it seems like it's just about male ego and how easily it is for men to feel offended if someone points out any wrong doing or drawback and then them not being able to work through it like an adult should be able to do. Everything came out of something. Life started from microorganisms and it just blew from there. Talking like you do will make women, especially vulnerable ones, like young ones or victims of abuse think we are less than and can be treated like nothing. All based on a text written by a man. It's almost like having women passive, thinking bad of themselves and feeling like a punching bag would be very comfortable for some