Yes, it does. You sence like you are cold and not empathetic. It takes a long time to get there. But you don't become that. It is just that you put yourself first and stop taking others emotins even when you notice them, only if people address to you directly, you decide to give them only what you think you should give and you stop them if they try to suck more energy out of you, without feeling guilty. For us it is not natural, takes time to learn the skill and adjust, but it will always be something we have to pay attention not to repeat old pattern.
When I love...I love with everything I have. When I quit caring, I feel absolutely nothing for them. They're basically an unperson to me. I don't wish them ill will, I simply don't care. INFJ Door slam
@natasavelimirovic6155 with me...its like a switch. I will care a great deal but.....hurt me, REALLY hurt me.....and I switch off.......feel absolutely nothing for THAT person but, still love others.
Push me over the line and I turn and walk away with my self respect intact. No one can take that from me. No one. I never react to any insults because I know the truth of who I am. They don't.
It took me 5 years to leave my narcissistic husband who treated me the same way my mother did. It took me 62 years of total destruction of my family to leave my mother. The only reason that I am still here is because of Jesus. I am certain that without Him, I would be 6 feet under many times over. God bless
I just got out of burnout, ended with severe depression and hospitalized. Not something I would like anyone to go through. Every word in this video is true.
Wow! Just what I needed to see today! I am in the process of leaving a marriage of over 50 years. He sustained a head injury 2 1/2 years ago! I had hit my breaking point shortly after the first 6 months but kept holding on until I finally realized I kept making excuses for his escalating physical and mental abuse! I finally said enough and called the police and had him arrested! (He was forewarned right after the incident previous to this) I am still struggling up from the darkness I had fallen into but being me I will! This video today lifted me up and was such a gift! Thank you for continuing to support INFJ’s with your guiding videos! ❤😊
A few times but NOTHING compared to what was going on after the head injury. I think it was in the background but he knew I wouldn’t stay with him. He was more likely to use passive/aggressive stuff in previous years( I know! Still abuse!) @mightymouse1005
We don’t decide, one day we are finally pushed to far and a switch flips and there is no going back. The learning, growth, and moving on takes us a long while. We heal, strengthen and move forward; but it doesn’t happen over a week end. Takes time and self care.
INFJ more than likely is really great at looking out but struggle looking in. When you start applying the skills you use when looking out and turn it inwards, life changes.
#4 is huge, well said. I don't think i ever stop caring, but i can accept that someone's success or failure is ultimately up to them, rather than my assistance or persistence in their success.
This reminds me of what happened when I got divorced. It took me a whole month of contemplation and a major anxiety/ emotional breakdown for me to summon up the answer and strength to end my 12 year relationship.
This videos is my only part of my life story, but it makes sense! I've been seen as an uncommon weird invisible human being my whole life! I've learned 2 get over that my mother n father r both narcissistic! N so r most people I've met in life! Thank God I'm Still here, ALIVE N WELL! AMEN! 🙏 😇 🕊
I just broke ties with somebody recently, and have done it many times before. We usually also stick with certain people (too long) for some of our own selfish reasons, and that’s important to note here but often left out when describing INFJs. Yes we’re very loving and empathetic, but we have weaknesses to overcome just like everybody.
@@cc1k435 Yes, I'm aware of that...however trying to balance the ying/yang here because the content online tends to make it sound like INFJs are walking on water most of the time. Very often we do try to be the bigger person and compensate for others, however, I can only speak from my own experience that I've also done that in order to make a good impression / plan something else far in advance / not disclose something private about myself / etc / etc. After all, we wouldn't even be talking about this unless INFJs didn't have plenty of areas that we can improve on. Sorry, long reply...it's just a pet peeve. I'm very careful nowadays which INFJ channels I follow because the last thing i want is for videos to stroke my ego. Not saying you do either - just sayin... Most of the time I'd rather focus on the things that help me to improve and keep improving, instead of being focused on how i have been in the past... I already know! 😄
I think our savior complex was addressed in this video. I think that's our "selfish" reason for being in toxic relationships but we aren't always conscious of it🥴
Yes we stick too long with certain people because we are people pleasers. Learn too door slam people sooner I learned that one too late in life but better late than never ❤
Excellent @ No. 6 - after all the pain and struggle INFJs can “get a surge of liberating motivation”. So true. One must wait … but it appears that ultimately the strengthening and increased freedom does occur.
I have learned not to care about some people . I help those thst appreciate me . Now i think the rest dont deserve me . They are toxic so i avoid them.
Thank you, this came at the right time, for me. I have had to let go of someone, it’s incredibly difficult, but liberating at the same time. Practising love & gratitude is key, not just for the other person, but for yourself, too. What I have learnt, is that I should listen to my body more, the signs were there, saying that this relationship wasn’t right, but I ignored them to the point, where physical signs became more magnified, such as; high blood pressure, weight loss, lack of energy etc. I’m financing my way back to peace.
This is the exact process I'm going through and have been through. This channel spells it out like no other and gives voice to what I experience as a human. Absolutely phenomenal.
I am in the middle of exactly all of this with a friend that has been draining me. Everyone around me has been telling me it is toxic. They do not understand I have to go through this myself. This vid really is extremely spot on and helpful. I do not feel so alone. Thank you !!
Thank you, I have been going through this very thing, actually getting better at it now. Reducing the number of people who are only intent is hooking me into an illusion because I see their potential. So grateful for these amazing videos of support and help. Love & light 🤍
I'm no longer accepting "potential " I'm at the place now where I am looking for excellence and capable. They can save their potential for job interviews
