When to Sever Ties With Toxic Family Members 

That sounds like me. After I cut the tether, I started remembering all the horrible things they had done to me. Made me sad. It has been better estranged.

I can relate! Be strong ❤

I feel your pain. At 41 I gave birth to a daughter with Down Syndrome who was rushed by ambulance to a NICU at another hospital because she had a heart defect. It was so traumatic that my blood pressure skyrocketed and my feet swelled up so much they couldn’t fit in my shoes. My father called me up and blamed me for taking medication that “caused her to have Down Syndrome”. It was then that I realized that I was part of a toxic family and had been my entire life.

Ditto...you are not alone in this journey. So proud of you for choosing love. Its the toughest decision I ever made but so much good has happened to me, like this man says. I was bound by invisible shackles, till one day (45 years) of All the gaslighting, manipulation, lies, betrayals, set ups, etc, etc. Sickness, (near death experience) Dr.s inquired about trauma, abuse,, PtsdI. I painfully yet Victoriously walked away. Bless you all who are walking through this dark valley of shadows of death.🙏🙏🙏💕

@@elizabethferniza5295 can this be done with a spouse?

Absolute truth.

I've had it happened instantly, and in another decade of my life it took a little while-- but it happened for me too! (Even when it didn't happen I met some amazing strangers why I wondered if God was not intervening doing me a favor while I was struggling because of the backstabbing smear campaigning going on... Back in my agnostic days a few years ago)

@@katiematzen2773 t

I had to let go of 2 family members. My family since salvation is the family of God. My problem is that I tried so many times that I can’t count because I felt bad about locking someone out of my life. Everytime it ended with attacks on my character and making up something that never happened to put me down. I don’t like being manipulated either. Troublemakers are not welcome in my family of origin but they can’t figure out why. So I feel sorry for them. But I suppose I should feel sorry that the relationship is toxic. Full blown Narcissists cannot be helped because there is nothing wrong with them in their eyes. I wish I had known this thirty-five years ago. Now living with a weird cat. She’s a source of amusement but also exasperation. God provides everything even pets for company. Limited contact with people. I meet with Gods people weekly. Other than errands or special occasions, I stay inside with my cat. I think twice a week with people would be enough for me. I’ve never been highly social. Faith in God has kept me going, nothing else. The gospel is life. Jesus told the truth!

​@@Dustandfuzz My family rejects the Gospel and are impossible to deal with. They believe in religion only and tell me I'm crazy saying it doesn't matter if it's true or not you just have to have faith in Jesus which makes no sense. Religion they believe in has accepted gay marriage etc. But I'm out because I say where is that in the Bible?

I love THIS testimony!!! I am absolutely alone looking forward to GOD blessing me with my spiritual family....blood is deadly toxic....

😅 I am almost 66 and learning boundries and seperating from toxic non Christian family/relatives. It's not easy, respectfully I told them I am setting boundries for my well being and health - the harder they try to keep their control and influence. Even tho I have different beliefs and vaules! Praise the LORD, He is our strength 🙏❤️✝️🕊🙌

I am 63.... same here! I don't think I will be seeing my mother again in this life, sadly, but hopefully in the next. Be blessed!

Gee Im not alone with those feelings. Sometimes I get a case of the uglies and have to ask GOD to forgive me for being unforgiving..

​@@Denise-mx6pwme too I decided next life

That is SO RIGHT! Their version of love is toxic, unhealthy, sick & twisted.

so true...and you can't expect others will treat you the way you have treated them...not everybody lives by the Golden Rule

Like this false teacher!

Sad 😔 so true 😪 no matter how hard you try. They want to talk to you, they want you to listen - but they will not hear you. Or care enough to ask about you... No wonder the Lord tells us My sheep hear My voice and for those who have ears to hear 💓 A saying that has helped me with boundries: "May we never be comfortable sitting at tables that Jesus would have turned over."👍 Hallelujah❣️ Amen!!! Come Lord Jesus 🙏❤️✝️🕊🎺⬆️

True.

Me to sonny, but no cat. Blessings in your lonely life that is awesome with Jesus🎉🎉🎉!

Me too, because they are atheist, and are toxic people. I love them but we clash because I believe in Jesus Christ.

That is me dude. My cat my own space

Maybe I need a cat, but I’m a relational person.

I live alone I do not have any animal since I cannot take care of myself much less than animal but anymore it is just phone calls that come through in my caregivers

That's a POWERFUL statement!!!

I believe that. My older brother & sister have always disliked myself & my younger brother, believing us to be 'favoured' and as the years & decades have passed their behaviour has become more and more evil - their hatred more obvious, with no attempt now to conceal their lying, self motivated and yes, murderous spirits. We had to cut ourselves off & leave them to God.

Yes of course. To study each virtue, to study each vice. That ought be our prayer life.

People confuse " jealousy" with " envy". Anyone can feel jealous but that doesn't mean they have the desire or urge to cause harm to someone. Jealousy is a reaction to insecurities, envy is a cold, vengeful hatred caused by pride that wants to control or take a life. That's why Envy is one of the 7 deadly sins, rather than jealousy. Pride is the deadliest sin, because it leads to indulging in the other 6 deadly sins.

Is it that Biblical, though? We have to be very careful repeating what other said, if it’s not Biblical. Pastor, pastor’s wife, mom, dad, friend, for etc

I love this…but my life is sad because…. I don’t really have any friends. 😔 Please pray for those who are lonely, with no family AND friends…. ❤️‍🩹

If I didn't have any friends I wouldn't have any family.

Love it

​@@TheMarvelousMrsMarquez That's what I was thinking. I haven't had any friends in many years. Toxic family members are all I have (except for my 3 sons, of course)

@@TheMarvelousMrsMarquez Similar situation..Not a lot of close connections…On my own

THANK YOU I NEEDED THIS!!!! ❤🙏🏼😭

Well said! True stuff. I experienced that geographic blessing of freedom while travelling far away from my parents & brother living in another European country close to my residence. About 500 km away thank God!❤

I felt this same freedom after moving several states away. Then my toxic MIL moved 15 minutes away from us…for no reason. And now I want to move again and not tell her where we go. There is no end to her toxicity

Oh my goodness, I FUCKING LOVE YOU. 😂 Sorry for cursing! I just…wow. When you said, “cut the generational curse,” I felt that deeply within my SOUL. I think it we have something like that here, AND I SWEAR, something tells me to move outta here. Like outta Arapahoe and Denver county (where my family resides). And you’re right about holidays, my boys are feeling it. I guess it’s just hard to make friends. When you’re 39 and look 29, the older folks em don’t wanna hang out w you and the young ones say you’re old. 😂 Help and please pray for us lonely folk who cut off ties from crack addicts, tweakers, and Satanist’s.

Great advice, awesome share, great choices. I am saving your share to share with other people.

I feel you! ❤

Sister tells me I'm the devil

I try to help her a year ago

And control's me fro. Seeing my mom

I feel you! Same situation on my end too. 🙏🏼

AmericanGirl: "Narcissist," is the new tag/label we apply incorrectly to others. The secular world has fallen in love with the word, and applies it far too liberally. Go look up the criteria for Narcissism, in the DSM. Notice the number of criteria that must be meet to be diagnosed as Narcissism. Once society abandons objective definition, it's in trouble. Late 80's, society entered a phase of "toxic parents." Many, many books on toxic parents were sold. Fads come and go.

Not just narcissists but also people who are high functioning but with issues like Aspbergers or Brain Damage or childhood trauma! We must be careful how we label people esp if we don’t know the whole story!

So you both incorrectly Assume to know that I do not know what a Narcissist is. Or that I would just jump to conclusions without facts about people I don't even know very well. One of my parents is a textbook Narcissist. My Ex is a textbook Narcissist. And yes it's a fairly new word. So let me use an old Bible word instead. Reprobate! Or Base Person! Or Wolf in sheep's clothing! Or swine! Or fox or whited sepulcher! God seems to be okay with labeling evil people. And gives us many warnings to beware of them! So if a pastor molests a dozen girls over a long period of time. Grooming them. Abusing them. I should Not call him a Narcissist. I'll try to remember to pick one of the labels God used instead! You both are part of a HUGE problem in the protestant church! The " don't judge or even don't tell if you know! Club" or better yet just keep preaching at all the innocent victims. Telling them they will go to hell for gossiping if they tell anyone. And of course just turn the other cheek. Give it to God and move on!!! I know way too many young people that were abused and it was covered up and now they will have nothing to do with the church or God!

​@@sheilasmith7779 Okay. Let's say you're right. These types of sermons are still necessary and long overdue. If you've ever endured true narcissism or almost had your entire life destroyed by it, you would better understand. A few people in this world are blessed (or cursed) to be able to see clearer than most.

@@MsDera81 Yes, teaching and sermons on the New Testiment are needed by Christians. However, one we are clear on the principles of Christianity, there are many, many to pastor's to choose from who share our beliefs. Why would I follow any preacher/teacher that behaves poorly....even if they share my biblical beliefs? We must stop throwing labels like Narcissim on others. It's just a label. I don't need to label James White a narcissist to stop listening and following him. He could be right as rain in his beliefs, but his arrogance, patronizing, belittling of oponents, and habitual, deliberate misstatements of opponents; these bad behaviors should stop all Christians from listening to him. We should never enable anyone's bad behavior, pastor or not.

Congratulations. Sobriety is Awesome Blessing. I was told 44 years ago you're Family is very Loving but very Destructive. So true. Heartbreaking. God is Great.

We can forgive and walk away. Many people are demonized in this age.

We don't ever stop loving, forgiving and praying for them ❤

Turning the other cheek does NOT mean letting people walk all over you and just accepting it. In Bible times, Roman soldiers would strike the cheek of a slave with their “clean” hand (the other one was culturally used for doing one’s business… hence unclean). They would also only do this with the **back** of this clean hand, to show dominance and superiority (a back-handed strike meant “I’m more important than you - you are nothing). This meant that a soldier could only strike one particular cheek like this, in a way that was acceptable to them. This concept was culturally understood at the time, and that’s why Jesus told people “turn the other cheek” - it was not a command to be struck again and again by toxic people. It was a command to stick up for yourself and show godly defiance. If a soldier were to strike that other cheek, it would be a cause of shame and embarrassment for them - because they would either have to strike it with the palm of their clean hand (symbolizing equality with the slave) or with their unclean hand. Since socially they would never bring themselves to do either, that act would basically be considered like a non-violent slap back to the soldier. A message of “I don’t care how important you think you are - I don’t deserve this treatment and I won’t stand for it.” This is the exact same idea MLK Jr. had in mind when speaking about and acting in nonviolence in response to racism in the United States. Very few people, it seems like, nowadays really understand what it means to fight injustice of any kind non-violently while also not letting people treat you like a doormat.

@@Romns1513thank you for the explanation. It has been a real stumbling block for me.

@Rmns1513 Thank you so much!! I always needed to know this, but didn’t until now!

I was going to ask about toxic colleagues in the workplace and then I see your comment! It's true we carry the presence of God as believers, and that shifts the atmosphere to align with what is within us. Toxic colleagues are just another story for another day!

I can tell you don’t work at my Walmart!

❤❤❤

I was between jobs working at a Wendy's. I am/was Christian. It seemed Satan came out of the woodwork to persecute me. The blacks declared me a racist for no reason. I never discussed politics or race. One black lady said I said such and such racist words I had never spoken. She was strangely delusional. The manager told me others said I had stolen meat and insisted on looking in the trunk of my car with it's pro life bumper stickers. The manager mocked me often snd loudly to humiliation sbout not being able to pack a box with fries. I threatened to report her to the police for falsely accusing me of theft. She said it was the general Manager's fault and cut my hours to nothing. I called a hospital in front of her and they told me I was hired and would make $18.00/hr. I loved the look on her face. At that hospital the persecution started again by manager and coworkers . The Holy Spirit can draw persecution wherever you go and all the demons around you will make your life miserable. Be joyful, the Bible says. Your reward will be great, as you swim in a toxic swamp.

@@sandman2345 1

Sorry, but that is not the message Jesus gave to His disciples. He just said LEAVE - and 'shaking the dust from one's feet' isn't indicative of a state of peace! So many comments here that are 'Christianese' - but not biblical! - I mean, did you even listen to the example of Jacob & Laban? - There was no gooey sentimentality here - God told Jacob to just LEAVE - and He would be with him! - When you're addressing when to leave toxic family members it's obvious that all other avenues have been exhausted. - I left on the advice of police after being chased with a knife! - Was I calm, forgiving etc? No, I was terrified for my life and God spoke through those police officers who could not guarantee my safety. Oh I was praying all right! - This all occurred after constantly forgiving the person & trying to 'express' myself! - You and the 56 people who agreed with you don't have the faintest idea what that sermon was about. Maybe listen again!

@@LibbySlaughter101 I moved two times to get away from having my privacy and property violated and vandalized. I could write a book. I I’m about to move again.

@@LibbySlaughter101 I was told one Sunday morning I had to move now and I was packed and moved by the end of the week out of town.

@@Carol-sy3rf Oh Carol, I am so sorry sister. This is too much trauma for anybody. I pray you'll be safe & I know Jesus is with you even though it may not feel like it. It's only been in hindsight that I realise God has always had His hand on me. I will pray for you, & please don't go back. Some people can't, won't & don't want to change but the way some Christians talk, there'd be nobody in hell. Unfortunately that's not true. Stay strong. Love & blessings from Australia 🌹🙏

@@LibbySlaughter101 we are in it together. This post has brought us together for common support. God is with us always. We will make it . If God is for us ,who can be against us. Some people don’t realize they are fighting more than us. They are fighting God.Thanks for your support! I will surly pray for you too.

AMEN!!!

100% the truth.

Run and don’t look back.

Very well said

Amen❣️🙏❤️✝️🕊🙌

I know how you're feeling. I'm 68 and I have 2 daughters and 2 grandchildren, who are being raised without Jesus in their lives, while their mothers live sinful lives. I'm so exhausted. I'm putting their lives in God's hands.❤🙏🙏

I’m so sorry, but i also understand. Draw a line in the sand. Will it get their attention? Whether it does or not, you are saying you are worthy - no longer an under dog to their disrespect

The more you give them the more they take for granted . I’m 76 and I’m tired of being treated as third party.Time to let go and let God

You are not alone. Blessings unti joy that remains.

I had to tell and show my Daughter that same thing. She wants to keep a pattern of when things are going good she wants to come around and when things are going not so great she wants to give me her butt to kiss. She just had a new baby girl 15 months ago, and decides to bring her around when it's convenient for her. I have released all of this over to Jesus Christ. I absolutely will Not put up with that type of Mistreatment. It is in the hands of My Father. My prayers are that she will not have to spend her whole life being immature and disrespectful. My Prayers are that she will grow up and make up her mind to do what is right so she will not Reap the error of her ways. I am believing her to give her life to Christ and serve him for the remainder of her days and turn from her Sinful patterns.

Well said.

Yes

Start with yourself sis

My oldest Granddaughter and her liberal mom haven't spoken to me or seen me in 3 years..and when she had my first grandchild..she said I was selfish, and unstable and she didn't want me around her daughter because I didn't take the jab..She not only broke my heart, but, my son's .I did nothing but be good to her and love her since she was born..I pray hard for all my sons family..they all took all of the jabs.

Thats insane

I got that too. Manipulative tactic.

It also says not to provoke your children!!

Omg my mother is the same way. She is classic controlling Narcissistic woman. I am not living with her anymore and she is old and sick now and she still doesn’t change. Like what the hell ! So I help her and work for her as a caregiver and try to come 2 days a week and I have another job too but she is always complaining and nothing is good enough. I have been trying to look for another job cuz I am getting ready to leave soon cuz I have been having anxiety attacks and stress issues due to this situation. I told her to get someone else. But no one else can tolerate her . But she is going to have to learn because this is toxic.

@@debbie2520so true!!!

This helped me a lot. I get confused sometimes, we're supposed to forgive everything, everyone, always? Even if they don't ask for it? Even if they give u the silent treatment??

Amen. Block them if you have to.

I did block them! I even moved out of the state without saying goodbye. @@JF32304

So true!

Good for you! It takes courage.

As long as God is our ABBA, Father, we are not orphans because we are beloved by the Most High God 💟

Got to give God the Glory and depend on him.

44 years, finally learned to set boundaries. Then she did everything she could to destroy me and my children's lives

Good for You. Guard your heart unto the Lord, and continue to pray God's word over yourself and your family. Simply feedback. I'm healing from a toxic family environment as well. My prayer is that I embrace God's Word daily, I continue to walk in God's deliverance and that my family is delivered as well. ❤🙏🏾

❤

No, you are not alone.🙏❤️

My evil sister has given me gifts. Should I throw them away? My jealous friend gave me gifts. Should I toss them?

@@danilaroche1156 You better ask Achan from Judges 6 & 7. I understand the point the preacher was making, especially when dealing with Narcissists. However, you need to seek the Lord on an individual case by case basis.

@@6toe687 Thank you.

@@danilaroche1156 give them away or throw them away. Be free. YOU buy gifts for yourself.

@@sonnyroy497 Why? Do you think the gifts are cursed?

🙏🏼❤️

❤

Amen

Same here

Amen thank you for a healing message that has helped me understand I can walk away withoit the guilt or shame and love them. And pray for them because the Holy Spirit is leading me through with a spirit of forgiveness and kindness W❤W praise God for His Grace in letting me get this message ❤

Always look after yourself. Isn’t that the way the culture is now?

​@@doriszimmerman4409That is where woke society has progressed over the past few decades.

I need to get away from my toxic husband. I feel God saying go.

To you also and thank you for caring, may God bless you and keep you in the days to come, in the precious name of Jesus Amen.

That is how I feel too!!! So grateful and it feels so good to be separated because now I don’t have to feel peer pressure in a bad way anymore

Vanessaschoettl I hope you read this, I have several family members who are like this . On Sunday they are in church but Monday- Saturday they are living in the world , most of the people who don’t personally know them assume that they are Christians. But to be a Christian is to live it/ not talk about it ( repentance is to turn away from your sin , not to ask for forgiveness and go right back to it ) I finally got to the point where I cut off all contact with the ones who are manipulative, narcissistic etc… since then I have never had such peace and my walk with the Lord has grown stronger. Don’t misunderstand me- I have forgiven them and I pray for them everyday…

@@bobdees6428 i did read it and thank you for sharing: i mean that. There have been several things in my life which put everything in perspective. You see, Jesus came for the broken, the sick, the lowly in spirit. I'm a nurse and worked years in prison. I worked with the broken, the abused, the forsaken. Do you know when I was in the valley that these are the ones who asked me 'are you ok' and told me 'Nurse, I am praying for you'. It was those years I spent in corrections that really helped me heal AND get everything straight in my head. It was there I witnessed the hand of God and countless miracles! Thank you for encouraging me: I woke up and just happened to read it. Blessings, my friend.

I needed to read your comment today thankyou 🙌🙌

I'm also having an issue with my dad and his wife. She is extremely narcissistic, manipulative, guilt tripping, controlling, scapegoating (i'm the black sheep and she seems to be in a one sided competition with me), condescending, forceful and rude. I'm not even allowed to talk to him on the phone without it being on speaker. I'm always feeling forced to do things she wants me to do because i don't like conflict. In small ways i've tried standing up for myself but am always met with her pushing back. She leaves me in so much distress and chaos when i talk to her. My dad just lets her do it too. His mom did the same to my mom so it seems to be a generational curse. Well, i'm not putting up with it anymore. I know it's going to be a mess and i don't know how this conversation is going to go but i've been leaning into the Lord and His word a lot and listening to videos like this and i think i'm going to have to step away from them altogether. I'm willing to keep it text only if he doesn't respect the boundary of only talking to him, but if not, i'm gonna have to walk away from him too. Your comment gave me hope 😁❤️

But when does the grieving process end, it seems to go on forever.

After my narcissistic father passed away, I walked away from my malignant narcissistic older jealous sister. I have to wonder if my father being alive delayed the final decision to walk away from my sister. I couldn't take her negativity and talking to people like they didn't know anything. Blessings to all.

@@jedi.in.christGood day. ✨ Respectfully, I just returned home from attending a Holy Mass. I stumbled on this thread and feel compelled to share. I’ve really struggled for a long time with feelings about this (estrangement from your own family members) and after much discernment, I have concluded this: 1. We all have a cross to carry: 2. The heavier the cross, the greater the transformation that occurs in our life; the greater the learning, the greater we surrender to God, and the greater our reward. 3. Jesus didn’t put boundaries on those He loved; 4. Jesus said: (Luke6) 31”…Do to others as you would have them do to you. 32 If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do the same. 5. The evil one’s ultimate plan is to break up every single family on earth. That is the ultimate destruction of God’s work, right? Will we really let Satan win? He is deceiving as many as possible. He entices us all and says “…you will be happier.” “Abandon them.” “You are better off without them.” “They are toxic. They are narcissistic. They are selfish. You are happier without them.” Do not do it. Be the LIGHT in your family. Be the one who saves your family. Show unbelievable mercy. Show unbelievable and impossible kindness. Kindness that no one deserves, but that you will extend because you are LIGHT and your reward will be great! And nothing else really matters. When we are in our final hour of death, what will matter? All that will matter is if we loved unconditionally. This is God’s truth and His greatest lesson, right? Jesus loved us even when He was hated by the world. He loved us so much that he even laid down his life for us. Even those who despised him, he loved. Let us imitate Him. ✨❤️🙏

Was it emotional manipution?

@@becca4559 yes it was and also control, blame and shame

@CarmenCarrol I'm sorry but praise God you are healing. I'm still in the midst of the struggle of balancing what is my doing and what is their doing... am I crazy, it's been a struggle to accept that I've been emotionally manipulated my whole life and have truly come to terms last year. But now I have to face a few things with them and hoping I can stand firm. God bless your journey

I understand what you have been through I have live with it in almost 50 years enough is enough. God bless you

Amen to that 🙏 me too

💯💯💯

Yes, me too, I'm done .

This has been so enlightening. After 60 years of not understanding, the pain and the whys, I now understand what we have been through. God has protected and guided. All praise to Him. Thank you Heavenly Father.

Awareness is Automatic , Discernment comes w/ Wisdom ; undisputable and LAW - Loving

Turn the other cheek is meant for Christians dealing with Christians. When facing evil we are to put the full armor of God. With general nonbelievers we try to bring them to Christ in a peaceful manner but if they do not have eyes to see and ears to hear eventually you have to come out from among them and pray for their souls.

@@kathryngagne5813 🙌

@@kathryngagne5813my family is people who just call them selves Christian but lack ALL fruits of the spirt espeically my mother. I’m 15 I want to cut them all off because I’ve been mistreated and bullied and made to feel worse about myself because all I wanted was to be treated with love and respect. I’ve been bullied by my own sister when I was younger and she’s so confused why I never speak to her while we live in the same house..she’s 20, she bullied me again recently and my mother got mad at me because a few years ago she begged for my forgiveness but didn’t know what she was apologizing for. Apparently she doesn’t remember anything she did to me. My mother is also a bully and my other sister is a coward who is the eldest sister and did not protect me whatsoever. I feel so lonely, I have no one to hug or cry to when I’m sad. I sometimes feel like live really isn’t worth living especially since my routine and life has been the same ever since I could remember. I just don’t feel loved and I feel so lonely and sad, I sit in my room all day, I used to say I hated people but I never went out. I just didn’t realize at the time it was just my family I hated. I try and try to forgive my mother as Jesus forgiven me 100 million times but I’m just so tired of everyone in my family. I’m so so so sad and tired and I feel unloved and I just want to die and just feel loved and respected in heaven with him. Even if I told my family how I felt, it would go one ear and out the other. My mother lacks compassion and once manipulated me pretending to leave me for good and I was begging her crying not to and she knew I was emotionally dependent on her. I think she enjoyed that. She’s so sick and twisted in the head. She works a lot and uses that as an excuse. I absolutely hate assuming other peoples relationship with the Lord but my mom is definitely lukewarm. She’s mean spirited and i don’t love her, I will never ever love her as much as I would’ve wanted to.

Currently in this process

@@allisa6010life gets better. Keep praying and don’t give up. I was there and so glad I held on! You can too!

Ditto

Amen!

Amen I did not know so many going thru this thought I was one of the few going thru this

Same .. we walked away from toxic family members 14 years ago

Smart move. Waiting for a different result will result in an infinite wait.

Amen!!

@beautifulsoul9479 God definitely reaches out to his people. Stay strong..

​@@johnj8840i had the HOLY GHOST was fine and I don't remember what happened but I got DECEIVED into the world long time. I don't know what to do. I regret looking back

Found this sermon this am. After a toxic text from daughter in law and son. 10’uears of trying to reconcile. Every thing you spoke in this reaffirms what we have been hearing.

Amen!

I'm on year three. It is God's will. I tried and tried. God made me try. Then He said enough.

@@user-fh9bv3vh3w Well said!

Praise His Name ✝️ I had to separate myself from my toxic family. The Lord is faithful and He’s healing me✝️

Same!!!! We are warriors 🙏

I have experience this personally toxic ppl in my life..i had to LOVE, forgive them and release them To GOD..because THE JOY of THE LORD is your STRENGTH don't let 🙏🏽 anyone take it away

I've been the toxic one in the past, but now a family member has been toxic to me. What an eye-opener! But it's good because it shows me that God is working on me. Thank you, God!

Praise God that you obeyed the leading of the Holy Spirit. God Bless you!

@@vnedecim Thank you. God bless you as well!

You are amazing!! So happy for you and thank you so much for sharing❤️❤️❤️

That is amazing!

Yeah. Arnold Murray wasn't a topical preacher, he would read straight thru the Bible, but many times in his sermons he would have to discuss this subject bc of the toxic family members in the Bible. Other than him, & this preacher, I've not heard any tackle this subject.

I’m in the same position, question did you ever say why or say, write , that you can love her , but from afar as she is not safe for you? Or just walk away without explanation? I’m conflicted

Amen

So true!

My in laws are toxic, ive had to forgive inspite of them not appologising for the abusive words theyve used against me...for my marriage and family sake. Only God can do this in me...please Lord Help!!

Actually, it takes two to reconcile.

@@lincolnlove1855 that’s at the surface of what I said. Though I forgive ( even when they aren’t apologizing), I will not continue to come near an animal that ( say dog for argument sake) that continues to bite me . Much less a family member who claims they love me/spouse. A person that loves you ,cares about how they make you feel. Until they want to be loving, kind and have a relationship that is healthy there can be no reconciliation. I will be praying and waiting, however no longer pursuing.

Hey I too just found out 1 year ago. And both my twin sister and older sister's because of what dad did are Very highly powerful sorceress who Like to attack my material goods. I just offer it up united to Jesus. But of course I pray hard and am doing all I should, fasting too, Deliverance prayers fill my life lately. Thanks for sharing. A huge shock for me at present all round. Just not sure how to block their sorcery on my material items. I do cover all in precious blood maybe not every item. Satan is so crafty, it's hard to keep up. Hahaa. Must 😃 laugh.

My comment got deleted, but again. Freemasons are a satanic organization. They commit heinous crimes especially against children. They cover for each other's wickedness and crimes. God protect the innocent 🙏🏼💜 You are not alone.

IStandWithRussia. You made the right decision. God bless you.

I understand! ‼️

They will stalk you if they want to make your life hell. I've got relatives and former friends affiliated with them as well as law enforcement, local politicians, and organized criminal forces. They will not leave you alone until they have no hope of getting the upper hand, even then they will never stop conspiring because that is the soul sickness which they share among themselves.

It's not from JESUS! Satan is cunning! Go to a real Church!

I just love so much how God uses his children to bless and teach others. Such a miracle for the timing and it showing up at the top of my feed. 🥰✝️🕊️💖🙌

@freedom fields Me, too.

I have broken ties with my only son(my youngest son died 3 years ago) several times and always end up trying to get the relationship back because I love him but I get hurt every time time. He is incapable of seeing the harm he is doing to me. He is a chronic pot smoker and I think his brain is damaged from all the drug use. He promised things would be different after his brother died but it didn't last long. I would love to find a support group for mothers who are abused emotionally by their children.

Same here

I'm in the same situation. Now my mother in law is on her deathbed. I feel guilty for not praying for her healing, but she is truly one of the most evil human beings I have ever met. I've just been praying that she won't die in her sins, that she'll meet Jesus somehow before she dies. She calls herself a Christian, grew up in church, taught Sunday school for years, but most definitely has a murderous spirit. It's horrible, but I long for her death so that everyone can be put out of her misery.

Moving on is a very good move. I gave my m in l over 30 years. What an utter waste of time. My husband didn't defend me. I had a breakdown but still persevered. Young fool. She died. Bliss ensued. But when my husband died suddenly her 2 daughters not only went in for the kill but aimed at my devasted, heart-broken kids, too. Evil ph calls, texts full of vile, vulgar malice. They contacted my pastor with lies about us. They gave me dirty looks at the funeral. Btw.They had bullied my husband, too. His step sisters. None of us had ever done anything but good to them. The day after my husband's funeral we all went zero contact with them. I changed my ph number. Never answered the door. I've moved since then as has my daughter. They won't dare go for my son. I wish I'd this teaching at the outset. I gave them decades in Jesus' name. They shouldn't have been given more than an hour. Take care. ❤❤❤

Oh my gosh my mother-in-law is the same way… What breaks my heart is this is definitely not the relationship I ever envisioned having with a mother-in-law!!! My mother-in-law has said some horribly mean things to me and I don’t get how my husband cannot completely cut her off.

After forty year I recently had to cut off my 94 year old mother in law… I tried for decades, loving the unlovable… no more. She can live out her life alone in assisted living. The final straw was more lies, screaming, calling my husband a thief and then, of course said, “ I didn’t say that.” I have not one bit of regrets. I pray for her salvation and leave her to God. My only retreat is that I didn’t do this decades ago.

@@Timbertrussminifarm I don't know if this is any help to you but if your m in l has to be in your presence in any way make sure you are not alone. I bitterly regret letting mine into my home alone...for years. I now wish I'd said to my late husband...I will no longer open my door to your mother or step sisters. You can do it. But I was away from my close clan and had hoped being welcoming would have improved things but it never did. Take care.

Controlled by demons and/or the flesh of evil thoughts. Must capture each thought.

Sounds like my daughter

I truly understand how you feel. I was like your daughter once. My Dad had cancer, and suffered in the hospital for a long time. I was rude to his mother, my grandmother. Because I hurt so bad, and didn't know how to express it. I've grown up now, but she's passed, and I can't ask her forgiveness. But I talk to God about it. Now my daughter-in-law has manipulated my son from me. So sadly we reap what we sow.

Alot of women get to a certain age and they turn into the Oedipal mother (men can do it too but not so much if they're married)... Believing their children and grandchildren are extensions to themselves... They aren't. Not to be mean, but there's a good chance some of the children and grandchildren grow alienated when these patterns continue... The mother doesn't realize in her rebellion of the Oedipal mother that she also is becoming one with her own children. The best thing she can do is be honest towards the mother/mother-in-law about her feelings... Instead of cutting them out or just "dealing" with it until resentful. If nothing comes of it, then sure, distancing might have to happen but I never think it should happen so much so that it devastates the other person unless they absolutely are just that awful and manipulative.

How tragic for you. God bless you and change her please

Wait, WHAT? You’re talking about your daughter? Damn…she sounds cruel and totally manipulated by TikCrap. I’m sorry to hear…. She sounds like the devil has a good hold on her, even when I was 16, I wasn’t that evil to my mother.

I had a similar experience after being married to a narcissis for 21 yrs. He was a womanizer & treated me as if I was his mother talk about walking on eggshells! When I told him I was very unhappy in our marriage & wanted to leave he sd I wld get nothing & I wld lose our daughter in the process. Well, I left thinking our daughter was in college at the time & she encouraged me to leave so I did. Unbeknownst to me it was a setup & I haven't spoken to my daughter in 11 yrs. I have written to her & have tried to call her but she has shut me out of her life! Her father passed away over 20 yrs ago & she still does not want to have anything to do with me. I am now 74 yrs old & still alone but do not regret leaving him he was toxic & now I think my daughter was brainwashed by him. I have been saved for 43 yrs now & know I will go to heaven & my husband I am sure has gone to Hell!

That's their biggest draw they use...rewarding God's word..now just sit back and watch God work on your behalf❤

Amen sister

AMEN.

Amen

Amen sister 🙏🙏🙏 me also 💙

Amen.

Amen.

Bbb

I am so sorry.

HE redeems and restores…the most powerful part of your comment!!

Amen…God will redeem and reconcile!🎉

34 plus years I just walked away from.

What about to love and honor in sickness and in health til death do you part?? I can’t believe God told you to leave a marriage. Maybe you listened to the wrong voice in your head.

Forgive and don't hate, let go, let him go

@@Justin-jf4ub sure. But he needs to be accountable for his behaviour. Would you go walk into a snake pit? That's exactly how I feel about walking into his company. Lord help him to change, but until then I'm good over here.

With Family members like this There is never peace With them and they use The Bible against you Always accusing you Of something that never Crossed your mind. It is so peaceful when you Break the pattern and cease Communication with them. You can love them pray for them. But not allow them to Keep abusing you.

​@@jenb7772indeed. Agree. Preach it!

Yes I have a brother like that too. Almost 4 years younger but so evil from early childhood. The devil got a hold of him from an early age

Not all family members take advantage of each other. My siblings and I help each other equally.

Yet there are siblings that turn thier own children against thier own mother.

The weakness link in the family becomes the scapegoat. Toxic families sit back watching it go down and are too afraid of the controller to say anything. Nothing is discussed or resolved. I’m admitting I. Am one from that type of family. Parents who are left behind usually don’t know why! The kids never tell. Boundaries are set and “no contact” rules are set into place. They may live just a handful of miles away but it might just as well be 700 miles away. I call it the land of the living dead. I know who is the prince of this world is and the prince of the air. But , since childhood, I have been a church goer. The main theme every Sunday is our King is not king of any nation but of heaven. The main theme taught in every Sunday teaching is how we can enter into His heavenly Kingdom. Salvation from a world of sin and despair is freedom to share the Love God and to see his face. He has a real home being prepared for us. There is my refuge and hope.

​@@robinluich6626 You are blessed not everyone is.

​@@robinluich6626 God bless you. Unity within a FAMILY UNIT IS A BLESSING...

AMEN!

🤗👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿🤗

You wrote this so beautifully ⭐️. Just wow.

WOW! Thank you for those powerful words, "Shaking you free from a dying tree"! Funny (not funny) how we think we are odd or retarded bcuz we are different from them, when all the while it is our Savior who is separating us from the caustic dead family tree.

I've had to cut off contact with my adult adopted daughter. She only calls when she needs money and when I don't give it to her... she calls me the filthest names. No one on the planet talks to me like that. I just gave up, sent a calm letter and blocked all contact

May your broken relationships be restored in the way only God can. To be truly nourishing and healthy. ❤

I have 2 sons also. I’ve had to cut ties with the younger one who is a major narcissist and is married to a Jezebel . They are disrespectful,cruel takers and it’s been on and on for years. He has broken my heart indescribably . I don’t get to see my grandchildren. He has 3 sons. The woman he is married to isn’t even the mother of his kids. She is so evil it’s hard to put into words . Thank the Good Lord my other son is good, respectful, and appreciative.

@@bamapatriot6750 Same situation for me. I'm not sure how the woman can determine whether the grandchildren see me- I literally helped to raise them, as he was a single father with full custody. My heart is broken. The grandchildren told me, don't worry- they want us to forget you, but we won't.

I have a sister just like that. she is a narcissist.

​@@fayharper6267 me too, and my dad's not far behind. Been taking care of him for two years and I'm ready to pack up and disappear. My sister's excuse is he's old...but he's been that way he is since I was a child.

They're referred to as the " ungodly" in the Bible. Romans describe them to an absolute T, when speaking of those who are turned over to a reprobate mind.

My hus is in that Narcissist arena. Not making excuses, I strongly feel he has mental health issues and it can come off as Narcissist. I looked up Aspergers syndrome and he fits that personality.

Yes, narcissism. Include all other cluster b personality disorders~ antisocial, borderline, histrionic

@Happy Dog put him in God’s hands. God will take care of him and you and your relationship. God bless you.🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️

I'm going through this right now. I have grieved and I am tired. It hurts.

​@Happy Dog I too, have one child, a son who has crossed the line in how he talks and treats me. I have had enough. Haven't heard from in almost a month. I'm sad but I know this is what needs to happen. I will pray for God to change his heart. I truly believe he is being controlled by evil. So scary and heartbreaking to say the least.

@@maryd9387 I agree that Satan gets a hold of our family members. But the Bible is available to all of us, and we can find safety, security, and comfort in the arms of my Lord Jesus Christ. I have come to study Israel’s history and prophecy, and it has given me so much peace and comfort that I can’t recommend enough to any of us that have the time to study. I am 74 years old and have never been closer to Jesus. God bless all of you that have had to give up toxic members of your family or friends.

@@AMS7200 thank you. I'm reading thru the Bible. I'm in 2 Kings right now.

I agree. This message is right on point, and what I needed to hear

Same! Have you read Toxic Parents by Susan Forward?

So glad you did now judges cps guardian ad lidem need to take notes

For about two-and-a-half years everyone I know ran when they saw her coming. I took this lady to Church and ran her to do errands and that part I did not mind. She had a drug problem. She lied to me about anything for money from me . Since you went to Church all the time I thought eventually she would change. She didn't I finally had to give her up because I was finding that I wasn't pure heart when I prayed to God. I was upset all the time. Jesus forgive. 😢 It was changing my mood and the way I looked at the world sometimes. Since I stopped her a pressure's been lifted off me.

Exactly! And thanks for the words ' bringing us together out of the murky waters" . I have felt so alone for a long time, now I am encouraged!

This!!!!!!!!!! They don't want to be "told" what to do, I'm a grown man. Now we are toxic and they have to cut us off!! Craziness! I feel like Mark needs to quit doing the clips that don't include this part. Self reflection is key when studying the Word of God

I was just thinking the same thing, but God doesn’t want us to be alone. The devil wants that for us, so he can whisper sweet nothings in our ears. Stay encouraged, and I will to.

Me too

Good for you!! That’s a young age but I pray God will lead you!!

Becareful as you age... I left home at 15, went back to try and repair the relationships as an adult in my 30s worst decision of my life. Most people do not change.

Smiley: There is a way to stop gossip shared with you, without abandoning a family inwhich the majority of members do not gossip. If every family member denies a serious crime, (i.e., pedophile in the family) we must leave the family....but not because a family member is a slandered or gossip.

@@sheilasmith7779 But if none of those family members that are listening to the gossip have not come to Smiley in private and stated that they are disgusted by the mother in laws gossip, then why should Smiley be concerned with having a relationship with them? They are just as bad as the mother in law.

My Mum is like that…she is two faced and tells Lies to hurt me. She humiliates me in front of my step family …She lied about something really bad happened to my Nana her Mum she is just a liar and I see it clearly now.

I’m so sorry I can relate.

​@@alpal87 Its so hard...Ive detached and I am letting God take over.

Very similar story for me.

This was amazing and so validated my decision to walk away from toxic family members who I've endured for over 20 years to be there for my parents gone now 14 years. I tried to be a member of my family to watch my nephews grow up having no kids of my own. I endured the hurt and invalidating of how I lived my life and my chosen professions but mostly my character of kindness and caring, empathy and love. I found my voice at 64 and walked away from these toxic people who bear my father and grandfather's good name and I'm done. You have to walk away from the bad and walk toward the good and God gave me the strength to do it. Great sermon. Thank you. Bless you.

@@drhuby6292 Sending prayers and love vibes!

I pray for God to protect my dreams and for only God to give me dreams. ❤

Found out at 33 💨

Yes, that’s what happen to me: the enemy sent me a demonic dream trying to make me believe the same. But, I canceled that dream, denounce it in Jesus’ name!!

I pray for my siblings but am finding it hard to forgive them because what they did was so deliberate and hurtful.

@@janeschreiner5000 Know that the narcissist is badly hurt, thats why they are the way they are. They put on the mask as to not show the hurt and pain and now all there is is the mask. They are damaged severely themselves. Fragile deep down inside but of course they are incapable of showing that now. Maybe that will help you to forgive them. 🙏

@@imy5279 ❤️Thank you. I don't think if you read the letter my brother wrote me that you would think he was hurt. He mocked me about taking the money and the items that were left to me that he was keeping. It was absolutely cruel. It’s going to take a long time to forgive that.

I’ve seen a whole lot of these in my family rand workplace. People who get together and become friends for wicked reasons. They are against someone and share the hate. They are jealous of someone and share the envy. It’s just bad honestly 😔💔

Demons know human behavior. God doesn't call ppl toxic! Driscoll is a false teacher! RUN! RUN FAST!

Same to me. Thanks GOD!

Amen. The same with me.

Amen…the Lord spoke to me concerning my toxic mom & dad!

​@@tonihendrix6652me too , God even took me on a trip through my spirit to show me some things !!

Me too! 37 yo son has had no contact for 5 years, from his loving, supportive family. Anti- family, cancell culture, wokeness is Marxism, Not Christian! DO Test the Spirit here. Very Dangerous, personal Anger.

As hard as it will be, pray for his will to be done and guidance to follow through, then set boundaries and stand by them. It will take time, but continuing to pray for the ability to endure and remaining consistent will pay off. Remember, the payoff may not include reconciliation.

it's hard but try to not respond in hurt or respond as yourself. i'm dealing with something similar with my mom, our history is long so i won't get in to it just know that it seems similar. she makes all sorts of hurtful claims about me in particular despite me not having done anything to her, literally the only thing i did was share the gospel. we were no contact due to my childhood for YEARS and when we finally reconnected it seemed she went on a spiritual journey. we bonded through this, talking of 'god'' often, speaking of the evils of the world, ect. that is until one day when i mentioned jesus. took her 2 whole days to respond to me and when she did she was trying to pull me away from jesus, saying he was actually lucifer, that the entire new testament is made up by the catholic church, among many other blasphemes statements. i was actually happy to know where her mind was because it made things going on in her life make sense to me, she asked me for my input and i gladly wrote up paragraphs upon paragraphs with links and sourcing, ect, explaining why i believed her messiah was false (she believes that enoch is the true messiah) and why i believe that jesus truly was the son of god. all of this was done in a wonderfully loving manner, she asked to have a discussion and i thought it was like a mutual happy thing, but i was so wrong! silence for days, then im met with paragraphs of why i'm the worst daughter in the world, why 'my god' is a disgusting pervert, and much much more. just told her i loved her, told her she was being attacked by the enemy, and that i'd still be there for her and praying for her. she reached out again 6 months later for about 2 weeks of peace before losing her mind again and going on a tangent to me and my brothers about how she can smell death on us, how HER god told her the world will end in a year, and how she doesn't care about us anymore. how she's smiling and playing with her kitten as she's writing the message and how she will happily continue her life without thinking about us ever again. it's hard! but truly i think the best thing i ever did in that situation was let god respond to her through his word and his works. many times i started a reply up addressing the hurtful things she said, or wanting to add my own hurtful things back at her to make her hurt, too. but god stopped me, made me take my time to think, and then used the opportunity to plant a seed through me. i will never look back at my messages with her and regret what i said, and i know i would have if i responded to the painful things she said. god is a miracle worker, keep your daughter in your prayers (im sure i dont need to tell you that lol) and respond with that god given love when the opportunities present themselves.

@@Bijinstraightstudio yes I think she is very mixed up and hurting us all.😞

@@lettus143 oh my so sorry about your mom. The erratic behavior sounds so familiar. And yes excellent advice about forgetting oneself and responding with love and compassion. I believe God is working on my daughter and am grateful. Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better.