Where I'm at, mentally // Grace Helbig 

I'm reading all of your comments and I'm overwhelmed TO SAY THE F*CKING LEAST. You are SO kind and SO thoughtful and SO real/raw/relatable/vulnerable and it makes me SO happy to be amongst a bunch of very cool and complexly beautiful human beings that welcome and support not only me but themselves and each other. It might take me a little bit to be able to process and respond to the ridiculously beautiful energy happening here, but, for now just know I see it. I'm reading all of it and I appreciate it more than you know. I started reading these comments while I was on hold with a customer support woman from Omaha steaks (I got my step dad a subscription box of steaks for christmas - don't tell him) I started crying while I was on hold, but when she came back on the line I got it together bc I didn't want the Omaha steaks customer service rep to think I was having a god damn meltdown bc my step dad might not get his cardboard box of meat on time. This part isn't necessary to tell you, but it just happened and made me lol to myself and in the wake of being more open and transparent here we are. This got away from me. Thank you for being wonderful. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being. Let's take care of each other.

“You’re most transparent when you’re trying to hide.” Shit, that’s deep. Thank you, Grace, for this video. It’s helping so many of us feel less alone. We appreciate you as you are NOW and always❤️

Beautiful and I love you and I’m very proud of you.

I’ve been watching you for 10 years... in a non-creepy, endearing way. Since I was literally 15. I grew up with you like a weird, absent sibling. Adapted to life through your videos as well as others and couldn’t be more thankful for a person like you in life. Anyway, I’ll be here for as long as you want to make content and when the day comes when you want to stop doing this, cool. I just hope you’re in a good place regardless because you helped me to get to a better place. You’re cool!

Honestly? I’ve always felt the most “connected” to you when you were the most candid. But I also realize that might not be an easy go-to for you. That to say, I’ll continue watching whatever you put out. Because you’re awesome!

It's nice to read all the comments because everyone was like, "2019 was weird." We are all not alone. I had a killer 2019. It was really tough. And I don't see it letting up--but, I've developed my skills of managing it. Things work themselves out. Things happen for a reason.

As someone who struggles with anxiety and depression and BRUTALLY beats themselves up for not being as motivated to make the art that used to make me happy, videos like these hit home and help tremendously. I've been a fan for many years and I wish you nothing but health and happiness in your life.

“I needed baby yoda to come into my life at the end of the year”- GIRRRLLL I FELT THAT.

I feel like 2019 was a non-year. Don't get me wrong, a shit ton of stuff happened in my life, but my brain just goes "nope" whenever I try to reflect on it, and the last three months have just been a black hole of emptiness. And january is not bringing the new year, new hope promise for me either. Well, writing this down is not making my feel much better. And cheers to me for bringing the whole place down! I honestly hope everyone reading this is doing alright and has much to look forward to for the next year/decade.

🎶killing me softly with this vlog🎶 EVERYTHING you said is what I have been feeling all year. Negative self talk. Comparing myself to those "golden years". Feeling disconnected from the internet. Overall feeling like I am both a senior at this school AND that don't deserve to be here. Thanks for putting your heart out there. You have always been an inspiration. ☺️

Hey friend, been here since I was still in the closet, in my literal college dorm in 2011 watching you and still enjoying everything you produce. I appreciate your candidness and authenticity. It is refreshing. Focus on the joys of your life right now. There may be a lot more you want, but there is a lot you have right now as well. You’d be surprised what opens up for you the minute you entertain the idea of noticing the abundance around you and relaxing into that. The world keeps spinning, your career is still rolling, your partner is still there. Life is good, sis🌈. And if change feels like it’s arising in some way from this place, accept that change and embrace the new because there are even better things to come (there always is!) Just know that regardless what emotional place you are in, us fans who’ve been around since you were gaming with Michelle in Brooklyn will always support you. And even further, your friends and family will never change. Focus on those constants when the rest seems like it’s fleeting. Even if you retired tomorrow, we’d still support you. But most importantly your closest connections in life don’t have to ever change. You’ll always be able to produce that joy and comfort with them as long as you have them. Don’t retire. Lol. But you get what I’m saying. We love you and this support is real. We want the best for you. I don’t mean to sound so direct. I just felt this in my heart a tug to share this should you find some note of resonance in here for you, because your true fans really do care. 💙

2019 was the worst if u ask me... You're not alone.

I love you! Thank you!

Just so everyone knows NAMI is an organization that acts as a resource for mental health conditions. What's great is that they have free programs and groups and volunteer opportunities. One of the best is family-to-family, and the way I like to describe it is as a "google translator" between friends/family of those who struggle with mental health conditions. Many people/loved ones want to help, but not everyone always knows how. Thank you Grace Helbig for having the courage to discuss your struggles with maintaining your mental health and its importance, especially in this hypercomparative era. Everyone, cheers, onward, and have a great tomorrow!

2019 was to quote the Great Goose... “Rough.”

2019 has, ugh, personally, I just, it wore me down like grain in a pressed mill. I’m only 33, but I had to move three times because of others untimely or not planned out departures, and because of being attacked in my own home. I had to have surgery, all kinds of medication changes, and I’ve been in this apartment since August and still really haven’t unpacked at all. I find myself distant and worn and not at all experiencing joy from the hobbies and content that usually bring me that. So I get it. Here’s to 2020, flappers and vision.

The uncomfortable vibe and she still talked about this and posted it 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 yes

Anxiety and self doubt are hard enemies to fight. Be kind to yourself on this journey, I have faith that things will get better.

Grace, I’m so proud of you. 2019 was a weird year I think for everyone. Anxiety and depression always fight with each other and make being a human hard. Thanks for being vulnerable with us ♥️

“I’m allowed to feel all the feelings cause I’m not a robot hahaha” 😭😭😭 that brought me wayy back. I’m 25 and idk wtf is happening (well we all kinda have a glimpse of how messed things are) but 2019 was a Whirlwind and I haven’t even processed 2016! I’m also feeling super nostalgic for 2012-2014 idk why they seemed so perfect !? Life was so different so much have changed and so much is changing so suddenly and I think we all kinda have a little shell shock from the massive shifts. You are totally not along there.

"It's been kind of a transitional year" Oh girl I felt that.. 2019 has been a YEAR xx💜 *sending you love from Vegas*

Everything you're saying sounds right on target for me. I'm a 52-year-old woman in the throes of a midlife crisis (that shit is real, people!) and every day is a challenge. We all think everyone else has it figured out. That's just not real. Thanks for sharing these thoughts with us. It helps to know I'm not alone on the struggle bus. I listen to you and Mamrie every week and the laughs you share together and with us are a gift. Thank you for that.

I've worked at a movie theatre for two months now, and have already become teamleader and the one who schedules movies. My boss came over to me today to say she thinks I'm doing a good job and asked if I had had time to process it all. My response was "No. I haven't had time to process this year. I have had one 4 month intership and two different jobs, graduated university, been unemployed for two months, moved three times, had three people pass away, and three of my best friends have had babies. I don't know what day it is or what I'm doing." Luckily, she gave me a hug and sort of laughed with me. 2019 has probably been the craziest year of my life so far. Like, the writers of this timeline we are in must be terribly drunk. The highs have been SO high, the lows so terribly low. The amount of doubting in myself that happened in those unemployed months were massive. It is so easy to slip into comparison, with yourself and others, and it gets you absolutely nowhere. But I know that you know that and that it doesn't really matter that people say it to you, because the little voices in your head are hard to fight. All this to say, Grace, you are amazing. Both of your podcasts always cheer me up, and so do your videos. You are in such a tough business which, from an outside perspective, you seem to navigate so well. Know that you have fans who truly love you, and we are all cheering you through this!

2019 sucked! Here’s to 2020 being the best year yet!❤️❤️

Thank you for letting us in, Grace! We are all here for you, and hope you can work through all your feelings! All the best!!

2019 has been a hideous beast and I’ll be glad to welcome in a new decade

Comparing yourself to yourself is much more healthier than comparing yourself to others.

‘It’s like I tied a bunch of bricks on to my feet’ , that hit home. Sending lots of love your way ❤️

Grace, I love you most when you show you are human.

all I gotta say is that I watched you years ago because you were charmingly awkward and relatable, now I've continued to watch because you're relatable on a different level, you're a super genuine person. Thank you for being one of the few that are so open about what you've been going through, it definitely helps us understand and want to keep supporting you. Plus I'm sure tons of people can relate. Excited to see what 2020 will bring!

The last few years have felt like a lot. The best we can do is try our best to be kind. Thanks for being candid, Grace.

2019 was a weird ass year. It was a terrible mental health year, but hey, we’re trying. So much love and respect to you Grace, for talking about these hard topics and feelings to deal with. Also, go Team Therapy! ❤️

I can’t possibly relate more to the feeling of guilt that comes with having an amazing life except for x,y&z. People would kill to be in your shoes/situation in many ways, yes, but as hard as it is for me to digest, things truly are all relative to the individual in question. I tend to be super freaking hard on myself and have a very hard time practicing or *feeling* what I preach when it comes to this.

Last time I was this early, Hannah was still in her vest, hat, and rolled shirts phase

At 8:09. I felt that. I got out of a toxic 3 year relationship this past February and fell into a hole of not wanting to do anything each day. It took a lot out of me to even get out of bed to eat or take a shower. I ended up dropping out of college after failing all of my classes that semester. And continued feeling like a failure. But since then I grew closer to my mom (not that we weren’t close before, but the toxic relationship strained it) and can actually talk to her about anything and now feel like this is the strongest bond we’ve had, I’m in a very great relationship now and we’ve helped each other grow, and I have an amazing job that I love. I love seeing my favorite RU-vidrs real talk about their mental states and just be real. I’ve been watching Grace since about 2013(?) and watching her grow and real talk is great. Grace, (if you’re somehow reading this) thank you for making me laugh when I felt nothing some days. And thank you for being you and the inspiration you are💜

2019 was a tough year for me too. My depression and anxiety were out of control. It seriously made me feel crazy sometimes. So, no, you are not alone. And thank you for using your platform to let us know the rest of us aren't alone either.

I went to college for writing. I’ve always been a “writer”, however my anxiety and a very current and new diagnosis I’ve published three posts in three years. The negative thoughts and self-hate is always the worst. Let’s kick 2020’s ass and throw lots of fecal matter 😂

I have mixed emotions about 2019. I’ve had some of my lowest lows and highest highs this year. Im ready to leave it behind and start a new year/ decade.

Grace, I'm an RN and I've dealt with anxiety and depression since I was 16, I'm now 38. It's rough. Yes, I take medication, but it's necessary. You have a different life than me, but we have the same obstacles. I have to be there for patients and their families at work, and ironically, I do OK at work. But, there are MANY times I feel like I want to rip my hair out. I've learned to focus on myself when I come home. Relax and unwind. Breathing exercises and using the Calm app. My husband is EXTREMELY supportive. Take time for yourself and do fun things... Even if that means just watching a movie! I personally love mini golf! Lol love you ❤️

Every person is allowed to work through their feeling even people in creative jobs, and people who have a social presence. Thanks for sharing this with us.

I’ve watched you forever. I have grown a lot since my 20’s and I know you have too. It seems perfectly natural that trying to be the same RU-vid “character” as you were back then not to feel right anymore. People evolve. I agree with what others have said. I love when videos are more candid and more real. I love watching you figure out life and grow. I have really loved the podcasts because it’s just you with no frills. Clear your head and get the pressure off yourself. It will come to you.

hell yeah, Grace! Therapy is amazing and "should" IS a dirty word and YOURE DOING GREAT SWEETIE.

Generalized anxiety disorder actually peaks for women in their 30's. It's happening to me too. Extremely bad, negative self talk even though I'm deserving of the positive things coming my way. I've had plenty of weight and burdens put on me before, but I'm having a harder time handling now more than ever-for seemingly no reason. Some of it is simply getting older and feeling a greater responsibility to be an expert in my field. I'm not the new kid anymore. I have people depending on me and the pressure is immense. And a new thing that has manifested for me-panic attacks. Never had them until this year. You can go through all of the exercises, therapy, attempts at positive self talk...but the biggest help has truly been to know that we aren't alone. What you are feeling isn't abnormal. The creative ruts your feeling aren't abnormal. You're one of the best and most experienced channels on You Tube. You're feeling the pressure. You just care a lot and it's tearing you down. Just remember you've worked so hard and deserve everything positive that comes your way. The younger version of yourself worked so hard to get you here. It's okay to take breaks. It's okay to slow down and reflect. Once you start to feel better, know that you deserve to be where you are. And you aren't alone. We're all having heart palpitations together. :)

Girl, the struggle is real. 2019 has been a weird time.

I’ll be 28 in January and started watching your videos a long long long time ago. We’ve basically grown up together, thought we figured it out, realized no one has it figured out. I think your core group of subscribers will always be here to see your content. Whatever it ends up being.

You’re appreciated and loved so much , by multiple people, and you matter ❤️ I love you and your videos lots❤️

I lost both my parents this year and have been STRUGGLING and let me tell you what, you might feel disconnected but This Might Get has been so helpful. All my friends seem to have disappeared because they didn't know how to deal with my grief and the podcast helps me feel like I am hanging with a couple friends just talking shit and having fun. So thank you for just staying true to yourself and being a refreshing candid human being.

This has been a wonky year for me too. I watch Michael Buckley's IG stories and he picks me up every morning!! Thank you for staying "HUMAN" and making this video showing us you are just like us!! Just getting through life the best way we can! We get to watch you and that also helps me get through the bumps of the day. Stay strong HELBIG!!

We love you Grace. I'm a 45 year old straight divorced man and you inspire me. Keep up with the therapy (been there doing that.) You and Mamrie and Hannah are everything right with RU-vid. Keep on keeping on!

2019 has been the worst of times and the best of times. Financially things have been hard. I stepped out of my comfort zone as a plus size lady and started my burlesque career.

It was hilarious watching the negative self talk slip out naturally and then the positive self talk be forced out. I've struggled with negative self talk basically my whole life and find this very inspirational to change

i relate to this a lot, 2019 has been a weird, sad year. let's hope 2020 is better for all of us. thank you, grace, i love you

I've been seeing a therapist for 18 months and when I found out you were seeing one too I felt like I had a therapy buddy 😊 I'm so happy you've made such progress and I'm proud of you for marching your brain back into those sessions week after week. You're setting a precedent that will inspire and save lives x

I feel like you're content hasn't been as c r i s p y because you've matured and grown in so many ways but you haven't really allowed your content to mature. Just ACTUALLY do whatever you want. No formula works for too long on RU-vid so you might as well give zero fucks and just do whatever makes you happy. Or, y'know, you could always just say fuck it and become a fortnite streamer. Side note, your hair looks really nice. Secondary side note, show us your tiktok likes. Sincerely, Abby

One time in a group therapy for anxiety/depression I was struck my how brave everyone there was. Struggled with considering myself a coward for all the feelings the wacky brain chemistry was providing. But bravery isn't the absence of fear, it's feeling that fear and doing the thing anyway. You're doing the thing, and putting it out there like this is an extra shot of "roar".

I can’t wait to hear your perspective, I love these kinds of videos with meaningful talk!! I hope you’re doing well Grace ❤️

Girl. This year has been BRUTAL. And I hate that anyone else is having a hard time, but also am glad to not only be the only one having a hard time. Here’s to a better next year!

2019 has been odd to me as well. Change is scary and it's been hard to convince myself to leave the job I've been at for 7 years but I had to do what was best for my mental health. I had a lot of time off work bc of a car accident but it gave me time to think. Started at this new hospital and so far it was the best thing I could have done for myself. I was stubborn wishing things would get better on their own but at the end of the day I had to take the leap and try something different. It's scary at first but worth it in the end. Taking breaks gives us time to reevaluate our lives and maybe that's what we need. End ramble and hang in there Grace! I feel ya

That point about the guilt for feeling bad when it's not that bad is so important! I have such a hard time with that and it's nice to hear other people thinking about that. Thanks for sharing all your thoughts, I appreciate your vulnerability in a space that isn't always supportive (a.k.a. the internet).

I’m so happy you have shared this with us Grace - I have watched you forever and was sad when you began to doubt yourself - it was very evident I think for your long time fans and frustrating because you haven’t ‘lost’ anything, you are one of the few youtubers who actually thinks of the viewer rather than the views - I admire you hugely, your work ethic, the intelligence, integrity and humour in your work is more often than not bloody genius - it’s been lovely to see you happy with your fella, that has shone through your content 🥰 I’m excited to see what 2020 brings and will be watching/listening/clicking/subscribing to you every step of the way 🇬🇧✌️

One of the nice things about life is that we are who we are right now. Not who we were last year or a decade back. It often takes a while, or advice from someone who cares for us, to see that as a 'nice' thing. That 'now' us is the important part of the 'life is a journey' idea. It's great to have done amazing things in the past, especially if we were being kind and helpful to those around us, but its the kind and helpful 'now' us that makes up a big part of our worth. You are a lovely, kind, helpful, intelligent, talented, incredibly funny person, who also happens to be just as beautiful on the outside. It was the now 96 year old (kickass lady, compassionate, selfless, always helpful, so wise and so much fun) grandmother of my partner, who over time helped me to see this. After a life changing car accident I was no longer able to function as a 'normal' person at all. With the help of amazing therapists and teachers and my loving partner and family I relearned speach, reading, writing, eating and moving around. As well as many effective tools to deal with suddenly crippling anxiety and depression. Almost every part of life that takes physical movement was an extreme effort. The kind of change that either makes you want to die, or hopefully with help, to change perspective and live the best you can right now, because what you could do in the past might have been nice, but what you do now and how you view it is what's important. I'm sorry to ramble, but I hope this helps people see another perspective on our view of this gift that is life.

Coming off of a weeklong meltdown because I'm not the way I used to be and I can't ever get back to it, I'm so glad you've come to some of the same conclusions I have. It's enough that we exist, here and now, and that we're present. You deserve time and space to start figuring yourself out (because it never really stops, does it?), and I, for one, will be here no matter which direction you and your content take. I've been here since 2010, like hell am I going anywhere. I hope you enjoy the holidays, Grace.

Negative repetative mantras (dark ones) have often had me over a barrel. They started off as thoughts, but when I started vocalising them, (involuntarily... often more than five times a day), I started cognitive therapy which helped me. I learned to call them out and challenge them each and every time I said them. You soon realise it's just your self destruct button being a muppet and trying to do it's thing... It's not who you are. It's not who you will be. After a while of challenging them, they start to fade away. Still show their faces sometimes, but it can definitely get so much better. You are a very intelligent person. You deserve your successes. You got this. Lots of love from little old England.

You’re the realest, most genuine RU-vidr I’ve ever watched and had the pleasure of meeting. Your videos have gotten me through so many tough times and I hope you can see the amazing impact your videos can have on us. You’ve been hazed. ❤️

Started watching your videos at 15 as a sophomore in high school and near 10 years later I'm two year out of college and in my career and your words couldn't be more relatable. A lot of us here have your back and support whatever kind of videos you want to make/make you happy! Forever along for the journey.

2019 has been a weird year. Even though amazing things have happened to me this year, my depression also came back which meant that I couldn't enjoy the amazing things that happened. I love your videos and it's great to see that I'm not the only one feeling like this ❤️❤️

My mom used to always tell me that everyone has the right to their own anxiety, because someone else always has it worse. If we never got to feel sad because things are relatively good, or happy even though things aren't going great, we'd hardly ever feel a thing. Having thoughts like "People would kill for this, I'm ungrateful" or "this is so wonderful, why am I not happy" is taking away your own right to feel your damn feelings. Feel it! It's yours. Also: you were the first RU-vidr I ever watched. I think I was 12 or 13. I'm 22 now and I still think you're so wonderful. All your different forms of content have brought me happiness for a long time. Thank you for that.

I started therapy a few months ago, and it has been a while since I've felt like I needed something so intangible. I've had one of the worst years of my life and having the ability to access your content when and wherever I need it has been a blessing in disguise. Thank you so much for being as honest as you can let yourself be and for being aware of the struggle that a lot of your RU-vid family may not want to recognize, but know that there is at least one person who kinda understands. Hindsight is always 20/20. Happy Holidays and Happy New year to everyone.

Grace, you’re breaking my heart. I have gone down the same thing. You are perceiving too much. If your looking for personal peace... your world needs to become smaller. Everything you want to do in your mind can’t possibly happen. Take a break for a few weeks in nature. Then focus on the single thing you want for the rest of your life and achieve that. Mortality is an interesting thing and you are on the eve of discovery. You are not insane, there are no words for us. Remove the noise from your life.

I think it's interesting how Not Too Deep is becoming more and more deep.

the struggle of anxiety and depression is such a dark, all-consuming fuck of a hole. depression makes you feel worthless and makes the mere thought of even trying to pursue things in life seem pointless. at the end of the day, depression makes us feel like we have nothing to offer..so why try right? but then the anxiety kicks in and is like.. wait hold up, what do you mean do nothing? doesn't that SCARE you? and then a never ending negative dialogue drives our mind. and our mind is the hardest thing to convince sometimes. for anyone going through this right now, I know it's easier said than done.. but be understanding with yourself. allow yourself to understand that you are trying your best and that your best is more than enough. the days that we live are so heavy to carry sometimes..but we make it through and for that alone..give yourself some room to breathe and a reason to smile. take care of yourselves everyone! and I applaud you grace for speaking about this. also, please drop a hair tutorial you blonde goddess. thank you!

2019 has been a weird year. Fingers crossed for 2020.

Grace, As a fellow creative, I have so much love and respect for you and I’m totally tearing up rn 😭💕. I’m 23 but you remind me a lot of myself and the way I carry myself and view myself creatively, if that makes sense? Anyway. This year I’ve been so uncomfortable and so scared and so brave and proud too and I wouldn’t take any of it back. I’m so glad you are having regular therapy now and I am so happy to see you with someone who recognizes how truly talented and hilarious and brave you are. I have mega bad anxiety and depression and your videos and podcasts have gotten me through months and months of insomnia, anxiety/depression, and kept me “company.” Wednesday’s are my absolute worst day of the week and TMGW helps me stay a little more sane by laughing on my drive to work, and just giving my brain something else to focus on. THANK YOU SO MUCH MAN. REALLY. And you are definitely not alone mentally or creatively. I’m a writer and I haven’t been able to write a single thing since I graduated or even put an honest effort in because I am straight up frozen with anxiety. My writing was really successful in college and I had professors that really loved my work and told me I could be great. I could not and still do not have the full capacity to believe that the work I create is important or even good. Now that there isn’t a due date for an assignment or a fear-motivated-goal to accomplish- now that it’s just me- I have no push. And I don’t believe in myself. And I get so scared to try new things and write and be truly OPEN with myself again, I feel myself closing up inside, creatively, and I get TERRIFIED thinking about like, what happens if I actually, completely TRY, and it turns out my best isn’t even good? And then I don’t even try because my brain keeps telling me I’d rather not try than try and have the possibility of failing. I’m clogging my own mind up with negative horrible thoughts like this all the time!!!! So oh my godddd do I get you. Anyways I’m going to shut up now. I love you and you being brave about all this honestly gives me the guts to do, go about the world and be human?

This video is such a mood and it’s so me. Hahahah. Power through, you’re talented and got what it takes

Thanks for being so candid Grace! Been watching your videos religiously since the daily grace days- you always seemed like the older sister I never had . I’ll support whatever you choose to do! Be weird, be funny, be candid and I’ll always watch.

I'm not sure if you'll read this but this video made me feel so at ease with myself! I drifted towards a bad depression and anxiety this year as well and might be able to relate to what you're feeling. Just know that whatever you do or what content you make, there will always be a huge amount of love and support for you. There have been so many nights this year when I've listened to your podcast with Mamrie and it just made the pain of feeling depressed go away for a little while. You're not alone with your feelings, you're just going through them publicly and that takes a lot of courage. I wish you all the best

My first year of marriage was also the worst year of my life, mentally. But i have to say that having that safe space to fall back on truly was the reason that I had such a "bad" year, I was finally in a relationship that was conducive to true healing and growth and creating peace for myself. So alllll my baggage and bullshit from my childhood came FLOODING back. And as I've learned to piece myself back together, I'm much happier with who I am now. I'm so proud of you for standing up to your anxiety and working through it. It's wild how much of your story mimics my own, I'm thankful to have been a viewer for so long. Thank you for letting us have a peek inside ur brainspaces.

2019 was definitely a weird year for me. One of the most emotional, and for pretty intangible reasons, so I really related to you saying sometimes you feel guilty for feeling badly about some aspects of your life when you're so fortunate in other ways.

GIRRRL - as someone who's trying to come out the other side of an ED and trying to manage anxiety and try not to like, fall into depresso land... it's SO SO COOL to hear you publicly kinda own those things. I mean, not that you have to or that you owe that to anyone but honestly it's just like, so amazing and brave and it makes me want to be amazing and brave too

I think its interesting that certain people's ~brands~ are being anti-emotion or "Not Too Deep" in this case because a lot of those times i think those people are the ones who really want to be deep and share stuff. I see this with Grace and with Elliot (and myself). These are the people that once they start to let the stuff thats been trying so desperately to get out actually get out everything will feel better and then they find themselves craving those conversations. Its just a matter of letting inner self lead their own actions and not trying to push those instincts down. Maybe this is me projecting and its really only me. I think when people are influencers (gross word I know) they want to project something and not change it but here's the thing with content - it always changes. The best TV shows have storylines. The first season of New Girl is not the same as the last. The characters grow. People like seeing that because its real. Its okay to grow and to share more or to share less but just be you. That's the whole point of this weird world we live in. Change. Grow. Be you. Share with people (or don't). Just Be.

it was a really weird year. my horrible lack of motivation got worse and worse progressively and i struggled so much to get through my last ever school exams. i am SO glad for it to be over and now i’m finally working a job i love (although it can be pretty hectic) and i’m on holiday from education and it’s so much better

“It’s funny how you’re the most transparent when you’re trying to hide.” 🤯 I feel this and relate to this, Grace. Love this genuine, raw, real vid. I feel deeply in my heart that 2020 is something we are all looking forward to ❤️

as a 22 year old who’s seen (probably) all of your videos and felt like I grew up with you as an older sister of sorts, it’s so amazing to get to continue to look up to you even now as a semi adult/college student. Glad to have watched you through it all and so happy to support you in whatever you do in the future :’)

It's so nice to hear someone who's in a similar boat. I just graduated and need to find a job...I just can't figure out what I want to do, and it's definitely been affecting my creativity and mood :/ You've always been an inspiration, I can't wait to see what you do next :)

I'm 100% here for totally real, not always "on" Grace. That's all I want out of watching/listening to what you create!

2019 has been a very weird year for me mentally! You're not alone.

Long time listener first time caller, I have lived for your videos since forever (Daily Grace days). Thanks so much for all of your content over the last years.

Grace we liked you aka you just sat in your apartment feeling like a person. I actu ally clicked on this video because I was hoping to not see someone overly put together but and it wasn't and it was a pleasure.

grace, you are frickin amazing and we love you. like seriously, i and thousands and thousands and thousands of actual people actually love you. thanks for being you!

Loved it. Love you. 2019 wasn’t great.... let’s do 2020!!!

Im turning 30 next month and everything you're saying is EXACTLY what I'm going through. I feel like I've grown up along side you, been here since Daily Grace, and I LOVE that you're changing and growing, and it's not always linear. Because, same.

2019 was trash but I have hope for 2020 - idk why but I feel it

2019 kicked me in the ass, Grace. Transitional for me. I lost a job. Thought I was going to change my entire career path. Was afraid I was going to be homeless when I couldn’t make bills. I’m ending the year in the same field I was in before, but in a much more emotionally supportive environment. The transition has been exhausting, but I’m cautiously optimistic about the future. Here’s how I’ve reconciled: discomfort and pain come from growth and change. If I weren’t growing and changing, of course I’d be comfortable. I’d also be stagnant, though, so I’ll take the discomfort if it means I’m gonna end up a more badass, better version of myself. Also, like, I love you?

Honestly love the energy of this

I've been watching you for YEARS and ad a 34 year old it's been really encouraging to feel like I'm not alone in a lot of the things you're sharing about, thank you for being real and sticking with us

Love this type of content. I feel like everyone “popular” on social media is trying to make everything seem so exciting and crazy to get views where as most of us would rather see something chill and real like this.

You catching yourself using the evil word "should" in present time brought such a smile to my face. It is so hard sometimes to identify the mean ways that we talk to ourselves and knowing that I am not the only one that has to catch myself on a day to day basis on things like that is such a relief.

It's funny, last time you posted one of these videos I remember thinking: "Man, I'm a little worried. I hope she figures this out." Watching this though my immediate feeling was.. "Oh...she's going to figure this out. No doubt." You're clearly in a healthier place now! This is where all the good stuff happens and you just get to let go and be. Can't wait to see it :)

As someone who also struggles with their mental health, I completely understand what your going through. It’s like everything you have said has resonated so deeply within me. I’ve struggled to get out of bed, struggled to leave my house. Struggled to do anything to be honest. Thank you for being so honest. Thank you for being so vulnerable. This year has been just atrocious for everyone. But hopefully 2020 will be the year! Also I have put waaaay to many full stops in this but I’m here now? So yay?

2019 was a fever dream