Why 90% Quit:The Brutal Truth of BJJ & The Art of Emotional Stealth 

What helped me was a change in perspective. Coming from an Mma and wrestling background, it was all about smashing and dominating all the time. But I recently just slowed down and went with BJJ because it’s more chill (I work a 9-5 now). And at first I would get butt hurt when I’d get submitted, throwed, or get my guard pass, But since studying Zen Buddhism and meditating everyday, I’ve come to a point where, I really don’t care if my opponent passes my guard or submits me. I actually am proud of my training partner, and always thank them, because without their success and improvement, how will our sport continue to evolve? So anytime I’m in a bad position, it’s always a new learning opportunity. Also, I don’t roll as hard as I used to, I’m much more relaxed and fluid. It feels like “tenseness” went away. It either is from meditation, or maybe I’m just getting older, or maybe because I’m 6 years into the sport now, but whatever it is, it’s amazing because I feel like weight is lifted off my shoulders. I love this martial art even more. I’m excited and I am ready to train till old age! Thanks for the video. It’s had me reflect on my martial arts journey. Peace.

first class - broken rib. 1.5yrs later.. still feels broken. thanks bjj

If you want longevity in this sport train smart. Im 40 have been training since 25 and haven’t had any serious injuries. Don’t get me wrong I’ve been banged up but nothing that has kept me out of training for an extended period of time. I’ve consistently trained 2 days a week. After white belt I really concentrated on technique. I surround myself with good training partners. Lose your ego tap out . That little piece of advice will pay huge dividends. Good luck.

Over 40 here. Been gym’ing for 20+ years. I can answer how to get back to the gym after falling off or letting yourself go. 1 - Kick your ego out the door. You’re not going to be as strong as tour last lift. You lost a lot, but not all. 2. Start slow and low. Don’t blast your body in the first few weeks. Start with two days a week, low weight, 5-10 reps. I suggest compound strength workouts. 5x5 is fantastic for this. 3. Focus on form like you’ve never have in your life. Pain and injuries can be prevented when you move properly. You can also lift more. 4. Make your goal to maintain exercise and health, don’t chase abs or that vacation in 6 mo. Frame yourself like this - death is coming for you, but as long as you regularly exercise/gym/activity you’ll stay ahead of it. 5. Listen to your body, and treat it with recovery. Stay hydrated, soak in salt baths, massages, what ever routine works that makes your body feel replenished. 6. Eat and sleep good. They’ll both feel like forcing positive consequences when you’re exercising again. Your body will crave both. See point 5 - listen to your body. 7. When you fall off again, jump right back on. It’s not a race. It’s a marathon. Good luck.

58 year old purple belt. Started at 51. Never wrestled or any grappling. However, I 've been involved with other sports and martial arts over the years. He is correct on many levels. Have competed in a few IBJJF Master worlds and Pans with some success and some failures. As a Master 6 moving to 7, I stay fit (5' 6' 160lbs) by training four days BJJ and four days in the Gym lifting...When training, I have learned now to drill and roll with higher belts out of self-preservation and keeping my injuries down. I nutruition in alway focused on maintaining a constant weight, and supporting the muscle mass I need as I get older.

Very awesome for an ex Iowa wrestler to find BJJ as an arena in which to excel in his 50s.

My favorite Conrad story is how I changed my weekly massage appointment to better line up with the day I have rolls with him.

90% quit because of cost, family and injury. I competed IBJFF and won a lot and was ranked pretty high for several years...then i herniated 3 discs in my back, broke a rib that never healed, torn my larum, tore my rotator cuff, got a concussion, tore my patella, broke a toe, broke cartilage in my neck, sever bicep tendonitis...so there you go. Im not one of the 90%

At 38 I made purple belt in three years flat with no prior grappling experience. I'm stronger and better than I ever was. I've podiumed in 10/10 of my comps with four golds. Age is a state of mind and nothing else.

I randomly rolled with this dude at the Sunday open mat one time! Who knew! He effortlessly passed me and took whatever positions he wanted. I was like damn, am I that bad? Good to know that no, he’s just really good 😂 or maybe both 😢

I got a blue belt and spoke to the purple belts who had terrible backs, necks, joints overall, and realized I would rather ski, climb, do muay thai, and learn the basics of wrestling and no gi. And trekking in the Himalayas and free diving. So there is a big world out there besides BJJ.

Having started in 1996, from what I’ve seen, most stop formal BJJ training for three reason: Time (work/family), money and injuries.

I was a highschool kid when I attended the 2-week Dan Gable intensive wrestling camp at the University of Iowa, Spangler was there with the Brands brothers and Lincoln McIlravy and a bunch of other legends. When the thumbnail showed up for this video, I recognized his last name 23 years later!

Ive been training since 2007 and this was such a fantastic representation of the sport.

I am pretty sure I rolled with this man in El Paso TX at City Wolves BJJ. Nice guy and a beast on the mats. I think he was recovering from some type of surgery but still a beast!

Awesome video/ interview! As a 42 year old, I felt like I could totally relate to being an older practitioner. OSS 🤙🏼

I'm coming for you Spangler! Also, congrats on the brown belt!

great interview. respect. im a 42 yr old brown belt and I agree with all this.

Im in Houston myself, I started BJJ a month ago, and its definitely something I recommend to anyone. My first class I wasnt sure if it was for me, but I decided to stay and I have gotten hooked.

The combat sport where you don’t hit each other and tap when something hurts. Great art but it’s the only sport that a geek become a tough guy.

many want to be a warrior and many try to harness it but the true warriors will always rise to the top ..respect brother...love the advice and content. 15 yr purple belt lol with over 35 plus years martial art experience.

Your my boy blue! Conrad Congratulations on your brown. I look forward to rolling with you when my knee heals. One of the best rolls. He is super controlled and incredibly kind man. He is also shredded. I’m a 43 year old purple belt. He was whooping my butt before the promotion.

Imagine a guy coming to class and saying that he only wants to wrestle because he’s scared of getting injured by the BJJ ground game… exact opposite mentality of most hobby people in most classes :)

Yeah, not being able to walk for days after every training session because of arthritis in my hips and two herniated disks, it was no longer worth it for a fun hobby. I’d rather not further injure my body that’s already broken at 37 years old. That doesn’t make me weak, it makes me sensible. I want to be able to play with my children and grandchildren.

I’m 54 as of yesterday. 27 years show up every day train hard, put ur self in bad positions. Tap and smile and train hard.

It's got little to do with "toughness:". I played flanker at rugby for 20 years. That's a tough sport and tough position. I only ever missed one game with a dead leg. Maybe I was lucky. I was certainly younger. Played from 8 to 28. Of course you can get injured playing rugby. But for the most past people are not trying to injure you. My experience at BJJ - I was a lot older but from 43 to 47 I was a hobbyist,. In that time I broke my nose requiring surgery, torn my MCL, tore my groin, broke toes and fingers, and had lots of other smaller injuries. Young guys were getting more into leg locks which can just wreck your knees. People say "just tap" - but it's not that simple when things are fast moving. At the end of the day I loved the sport - but decided the injuries were just not worth it. So now I just run and lift 6 times a week. I am in pretty good shape and I am not injured all the time. Just my 2 cents. I do still follow the sport and wish I had started younger,

Great videos man! The quality on your vids are insane 😊👍

I punked out after a while because my main thing is cycling. I was constantly worried my knee was gonna get jacked and I'd miss my fav thing in the world. Kudos to sticking in there with it though!

This is great, dude! Keep it up!

I was 58 when I walked into a BJJ (Buddhist pajama party) gym. I was rear ended in a motorcycle accident two years prior and had many past injuries. Severed right ulnar nerve, broken right collar bone, neck damage, knee damage,etc. I have never trained any martial art. I have never done any PED's. So, these guys 20 to 30 years younger than me, proceeded to beat the shit out of me. I made the right choice and preserved myself. At 52 I bicycled 9,000 miles in 5 months totally circling the lower 48. Slept in bivvy bag and under a tarp. I am a US Marine. I can see trouble. I don't get into any. I took an oath to protect and serve the US Constitution. I will always remember that BJJ Gym as a senseless place. All of peoples "what if" mind sets have never happened to me and I have been around the block. BJJ is another trend. Join the Marine Corps. Good Luck to You All, My Friends.

Dead on accurate. The truth is never glamorous and this was a perfect example of good, solid mindset.

54 here….purple belt on the edge of getting brown…excellent video

Fucking brilliant video. Nailed it dead on, BJJ and fighting in general will beat you down but you will never be truly defeated until you stop walking onto the mats.

Awesome channel Jae! I trained with you under Brian for a while, but now I'm further in town. Looking forward to watching your content!

Fact of the matter is that any physically intensive sport like BJJ has most of their guys over 40yr are running a decent TRT program or PED cycle just to keep up with the demands on the joints and recovery. There's way too much nonsense on the internet regarding what most people can manage once the injuries start accumulating (especially things like damaged ACL, torn rotator cuffs, herniated disc, etc). BJJ without a physically intensive strength/conditioning program is just asking for horrible injuries, there's way too many BJJ hobbyists I know that just do BJJ and refuse to train their body accordingly in order to take the demands placed on it. The lack of proper training and nutrition is the main reason so many people end up with injuries and unable to sustain it long term. Can't work a desk job, spend no time lifting/running, eating a shitty diet and expect to be able to do a combat sport. Mindset alone will not overcome the most basic requirements for the foundation required for longevity.

This was a fun watch, thank you. Guy seems like a badass.

I like this guy, he is thoughtful and looks like a peaceful man who can rip your arms out of your sockets lol.

Is there a version of this without all the interruptions?

90% quit because its 200$ a month and a gun can beat any black belt 😅

"Anyone can handle victory but only the mighty can bear defeat"

Trt is the fountain of youth after 40.. just saying

Never quitting. I will be the nail if I have too but never quitting

2,5 years of training and i quit. Injury after injury and just plain feeling shitty all the time both mentally and physically. Now i finally feel great. Fuck jiu jitsu.

Hell yeah. I’m 35yo blue belt. I hope to still be able to do jiu jitsu in my 50s!

A lot of people roll harder than they actually need to.

Great quality production, great message and great values that you have brother. Subscribed and may God bless you and your channel

BJJ is really badly taught and then BJJ guys like to hype themselves by doing these kinds of videos about how tough bjj is bro, the weak can't survive. BJJ is not being taught in a way to bring people through to proficiency in a sustainable way. The bjj is tough argument us just students being left to sink or swim

I trained with Spangler in Arizona. Great guy

dudes like, I was in the military. Oh, what branch? All the militaries.

Conrad: Those are the most frustrating to me. When people don't want to open up and show their skills. They're basically just trying to survive. Me: cries in white belt...

it's not that "mental toughness" or whatever why ppl quit. It's the joints being ripped apart, dislocated, constantly inflamed for what exactly? So that you can be a quadriplegic at 60?

that is all very admirable but you have to also tell the other part of the story - that you are obviously also on exogenous hormones which tremendously helps to be tough, driven and strong, dont tell the guys in theyr 50s they can just come on the mat and do the same beacuse theyr body will break down at much quicker pace, i dont judge and i have nothing against it but you need to say truth and dont play it on mental toughenss alone bro

90% quit EVERY martial art style. Style exceptionalism is pretty stupid frankly.

I stopped because it was too expensive to afford a jits membership. I can't wait to get back on the mats.

most people who quit do quit not because it is so tough and brutal that is plain bs .maybe judo is the case for that maybe kickboxing but in bjj a lot of people quit because the dojos are boring the coach is not dedicated fully they play the same music etc other reasons are people go in bjj for the wrong reasons and soon they find out it is not for them other people quit because of toxic or elitist dojo culture people quit because of different reasons unrelated to bjj and the training...so if joe rogan and other influencer sent you to a bjj dojo or just because it is trendy and you have to be there well you will quit soon because you are just another consumer addicted to buying and this time you got convinced to buy bjj gear ha ha ...so as danaher said you need to have some demons to enter a dojo and even more to stay

Because it’s really kind of lame. No kid ever thought of BJJ when dreaming of martial arts.

No wonder he's so tough, he wrestled under Dan Gable.

Inspiration man, I'm 38, trying to be like this guy

Fractured my toe first class, cracked a few ribs, got staph twice. I’m still not quitting. White belt for life!

Incredible interview, I love his outlook! I live in the Houston area and would love to roll sometime!

Great interview skills and your demeanor is highly l engaging

A 5'4 compact guy with genetics like a bear tells me, at 6'5 and with bones that literally crack and a spine that fractures a hundred times more easily, that it's about mental toughness. NO, I JUST DON'T WANT TO BE PARALYSED!

Good interview!

Thanks for the video!

90% of ppl can’t afford $150 a month gym memberships, three $150 pajama outfits. Want to do an IBJJF tournament, better talk to ur boss about over time. Register ur belt, hotels, gi,No Gi, $500 weekend easy. I’d just wrestle. They don’t even let wrestles compete as white belt.

Grat interview,I'm a 56 old black belylt who used to train consistently 3/4 times a week before covid,but since trying to get back into shape has been difficult. Also injuries take longer to recover from. But still love training just have to train smarter

13 yrs in Bjj yes all that are true but trt makes a huge difference in our 40’s and 50’s

I've been the nail for long enough. IT'S HAMMER TIME!

That guy gets it!

Coach Conrad is a beast

Great interview, interesting comments from Conrad. However, I would quite strongly disagree with the idea that the vast majority of practitioners quit due to ego or mental toughness reasons. The biggest reason to quit, by far, is sustained injuries. Not sure why few videos actually highlight this. What Conrad mentioned here was that he, as a former wrestler with a very strong body already, suffered many injuries in this sport. Imagine a person without that level of strength or wrestling background and how susceptible they are to injury.

Anchors In Conrad... Semper Fi

Nice content, not many we have role model from older people who actively compete and doing great.

Ok so we find out right away why he's a beast. "I wrestled at Iowa." Period, I don't need to know anything else.

Great video

if youre not on TRT things will be much more difficult

Frist video . I have watch man huge respect sir I pray we get to train together one day man huge respect.

I'm trained very well with knife fighting and guns. I like knives better. I've paid my dues in BJJ, but it's not good for street fighting. If you can avoid a street fight, DO IT! This BJJ shit is a nightmare. I beat a guy's ass, it went to court, the D.A. made me look like some killer on the streets. I was sucker punched at a "house party" and had to defend myself. I gave this person a beating, big time. Then I had to fork out THOUSANDS of "dollars" to fix his face and mouth up and attorney fees to keep me out of prison. It's not worth it. Stay away from trouble, bars, etc. That was over a decade ago. Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu has a lot of bad "instructors" which will land you in jail, prison, or dead.

Nice video old man.

I was in the same unit with Conrad at JMC Fort Bliss. I am 43 y/o currently a blue belt and compete. Where do you guys train?

Thank you!

Yeah HGH and TRT to the gills baby 😂.. talking about mental thoughness 🤣😭

Why 90% quit; no offense, but a lot of people cant afford the extortionate fee and charges

Damn bro, quality content. This shit is it. 👏

subbed - good work

are these guys even serious? of all the combat sports i learned, BJJ was by far the most chill and fun. Unlike with others, with bjj i dont have to worry about having eaten enough, having slept enough, being in good shape atm. I can always just come and do a lil rolling. When doing techniques i sometimes do em blind because vision often doesnt even matter. After i started BJJ i became so goddamn lazy because in BJJ you just lie on the floor most of the time.

Super expensive can't find a gym below 150 around, it's crazy

Loved the part about "emotional stealth" and keeping the poker face, I've always knew this but its one thing I want to get better in...

I agree ... everything mental especially competing

It's all about genetics, I think. I'm 46 and with my back I can't roll. Emotionally, I'm not taking it well.

My man is roided to the gillz!

I don’t respect BJJ I view it as an ultra sporty submission wrestling form I prefer MMA with my base as Greco, Catch, Folkstyle, Boxing, and Muay Thai But I am mostly interested in combat sports for self defense Would like to compete but it’s not my priority Hoorah to that marine I’m a retired infantry marine for combat ptsd from my tour in Iraq from 04 to 05 But I am sure that coach understands the difference Grappling is a sport MMA is a sport Most tactics will not be used in combat or self defense but catch wrestling is far more superior so is Pankration

Half way to blue belt!!!

I’ve only rolled once but never figured out how to put like an arm bar between my legs, would seem to squeeze or squish my groin. Someone said to get a cup and it would solve that ? Also, you have to accept the fact that you will be up close and personal with another sweaty guy. I guess wrestlers BJJ artists and athletes have been doing that for years, but some nerdy folks like me are just not used to that. :) Blessings!

He reminds me of chute from vision quest.

"People just don't have the mental toughness" I'm people 😭

Good video but title is misleading. Not a lot here about why 90% quit.

Hi, could please share the link of knee support he was wearing for BJJ training? Thank you

BJJ is awesome. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

I go to renzo gracie milford under Mark cerrone I agree its such a good culture I love it there