Why are weddings so damn expensive? 

If you think a wedding is expensive, wait till you get a divorce.

The attitude of avoiding talking about price makes me furious. It's just disrespectful to the customer.

my 'ancestors'?? Did she mean my 'descendants'?

And we wonder why millennials don't bother with marriage. The wedding business is killing the wedding.

If Americans think their weddings are expensive, wait till you see the Indian ones! People go bankrupt after them, and I'm not even kidding

The 3 biggest rip off industries: Weddings, Homes and Funerals.

It's funny to see people say "Invite only a dozen" clearly you don't have an Arab or Latin family... Am I Right?

Weddings are expensive because society, especially women, have taught young women that being princess for a day is so dang important.

My wedding cost almost nothing. We had a reception at our church (free to book) with just a few snacks for people to come and go whenever they pleased, family made the cake and helped decorate the reception area, and we had a simple wedding breakfast with just close family at an inexpensive buffet restaurant. I have never understood the mentality of spending thousands of dollars on a wedding.

And then they divorce afterwards. A huge waste of money! Marriage is way more important than the wedding.

In most asian cultures, wedding is where families who wed their children. "show-off" their wealth buy inviting large amounts of people (consists of close relatives, distant relatives, colleagues, families that were brought by the guests, and so on), heck it can even reach to more than 400-ish people came to the wedding event. also renting a big ballroom in hotels or someplace, hiring a reputable catering service, wedding gifts for guests that came to the wedding, music/band, photo/videographer and so on. All of this can cost up to $100k-$150k and can be even more!

American channel: Weddings are expensive. Me: *laughs in Indian*

Your ancestors are going to see your wedding photos? Do you have a time machine, because that is awesome!

30k? You can get a all expenses paid year round vacation with that money...

my ex and I got married in the park and had a BBQ afterwards. cost about $500. we divorced 8 years later so I am glad I did not waste 10's of thousands on a silly wedding.

As a former wedding photographer, I listed the price range on my site. The clients appreciated the transparency and I avoided all the tire kickers.

Remember the wedding lasts one day but the marriage lasts a lifetime. Save on the wedding and splurge on your marriage ;)

we did a backyard wedding - 75 people.. wife's dress was from a second hand wedding store - we rented a pizza truck and we hired a dj who was cool to not overcharge.. it cost us under 7k including the dress and my outfit.. everything! we had an excel spreadsheet :)

Not going to go through all of this ceremonial crap. I'm going to make the honeymoon the actual wedding. And get a drone to photograph and film all of our experiences. Problem solved.

I don't understand why people think weddings are always expensive. You literally choose how expensive its going to be. It could be $200 if you wanted

I wonder how much a Red Wedding will cost.

Starting a marriage with a huge (unnecessary) debt doesn't sound smart. It will just create stress and unhappiness later on.

try a Chinese wedding. you get red packets from guests and this way the it pays for the wedding itself plus you get extras. Chinese are smart :)

Yeah I'mma just use that 30k for vacations and Start ups

Then it settles it I'm getting married at a courthouse and throw a small party for friends and family afterwords in the back yard complete with cake I baked myself.

I think that last bit of advice is a good one. Rather than being like "This is what I need, what are your prices?" saying "This is my budget, what can I get with it?" will give a salesperson less of a reason to give you the most expensive thing possible, and make them think of the best thing within those limitations. I used to work for a wireless service provider, and when selling a phone I would always ask them their budget first, because my commission was usually the same no matter what they chose. When the money you make is directly proportional to the money the client is spending, however, you're going to want to do what's best for the business and try and entice them to buy more.

My wedding, and dress cost my husband and I about $1,500 for 110 guests. There was no way on earth we were going to start off our lives together in debt by throwing a party for people who would forget every detail the next day. We took a week long honeymoon in an expensive hotel in the mountains of Colorado to celebrate US. We have never been in debt, we travel the world with our son, and wouldn’t change a thing about our wedding day.

Heck no!!! 15,000 dollars? In that case I will have a nice little ceremony with family and close friends, i mean close, at my home church. Then rent out an affordable reception hall, maybe one in an inexpensive hotel. Food, cake, fam, friends, dj, photographer, videographer. No extra. That's what I see at weddings. A lot of extra things done for just one day. One main thing for is having flowers as the center pieces to be honest. Guest will be less than 70 people and that's pushing it. Have a cheap wedding and then go somewhere nice for your honeymoon, at least for me that's what I want. I love traveling. You can have a beautiful, cheap wedding.

tip #1: make your own dress or wear your job interview dress same for tux tip #2: make your own cake tip#3: learn to make paper flowers tip#4: you can make beautiful decoration with things from dollar tree tip#5: go to a courthouse for the actual marriage part and just have an after party tip#6: Call everyone to see if they would bother attending before sending invites tip#7: There are plenty of photography students at community colleges who want money and charge less tip#8: use a small local park as a venue just like people do for birthday parties

honestly, if you can afford it, why not? I don't see any reason to shame a couple who wants to go full out, same goes to those that don't.

The most un-original comment in the comment section: "Save your money, don't get married."

REALITY CHECK: Weddings do NOT have to be so damn expensive. All you *have* to pay for is the marriage license, which costs around $20 - $100, depending on where you live. Everything else (the rings, ceremony, gown, suit, food, afterparty, etc) are things *you* choose to purchase and you are under no obligation to spend a certain amount on any of it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

For some reason I've always hated economical plots and strategies in general. Makes it feel like you sell a little of your soul or sacrifice some of your empathy for others in order to make greater profit.

One of the reasons I loved my florist is that when she saw pictures of what I want see immediately warned me about the prices of the flowers. We then talked about substitutes for the really expensive ones so I could get the look without the cost. That kind of thinking and consideration of my budget is why I recommend them to everyone in my area. And the flowers were great! But she was one of the only people who were honest and upfront about price.

did anyone else think the intro was an ad?

Both my parents have been married several times and they've gotten cheaper prices from caterers and other vendors by calling the event a "party" rather than a wedding, some companies really do take advantage

Well.... better than the funeral industries. Also a "once in a lifetime" experience (literally) but the cost of caskets, embalming and services are super high with no reason being why. The funeral industry is basically a cash cow. This industry target extremely unstable and emotionally vulnerable just like the wedding industry (yes, i just said wedding couples are unstable. Its true sometimes!) to get a shit ton more cash. There's a circle called Greed in hell just for them.

I'm so glad I didn't make the big mistake of paying $31,000 on my wedding. My husband and I only spent about $3500 on our small, DIY church wedding and only invited families and friends. It might not have been the grandest wedding, but we had the time of our lives. Honestly, the way I see it, what makes a wedding day memorable is finally being able to marry the love of your life and being surrounded by the people that truly matter. People spend thousands, sometimes even millions, of dollars to have their dream wedding, only to divorce soon after. In the end, it's the quality of your marriage that matters not the quantity you spend on your wedding day.

My fiancé and I had set a budget of $4000 for our Harry Potter themed wedding thinking 'yeah that should be enough'. Little did we know looking for vendors that our entire budget would be the down payment for one place. At first we thought 'are we crazy, but does $4000 for a single vender sound too much?' After watching this video we realized that 'YES' it was too much. We think it's absolutely horrible that certain vendors take advantage of new couples just because we drop the 'W' word. Going into shopping for the rest of our wedding, (were still in the process of planning it), we are supper careful when using that word, and now we know the truth of why they are so expensive. p.s. Still considering elopement as an option!

Weddings are a ripoff, why spend all that money when there's student loans and mortgages to be paid?

many years ago, my girlfriend was planning her wedding and she noticed when she called around for prices if she said it was for "a party" the prices were quite a bit lower than if she said it was for "a wedding" for the same exact thing.

lol 120-115 ppl wedding? lol that's less than half the helpers involve in an average Indian wedding.

I wonder how many people get divorced why they are STILL paying off the wedding? OUCH that's gotta suck

sorry, in America it is not "once in a lifetime".

I rather have one of those backyard home weddings

we needed a hotel room for after the wedding before we left for our honeymoon. we asked for the wedding night package (whatever it was called) which was supposed to include stuff like rose pedals, champagne, candles, late check-out, his and her robes, etc.. the hotel didn't do any of that so I figured ok they just put us down for a normal suite and ordered a bottle of champagne via room service. next morning they slid the paper under the door at normal time and when we went to checkout they still charged us the special wedding price like 300 buck MORE than a normal suite. unbelievable.

Screw weddings , why in the hell are funeral so damn expensive! I think they prey on the families . Same as they do for weddings. all about FEELINGS! So what is the price for YOUR feelings?

Well, my husband and I spent maybe $3000 for our wedding, and honestly, it was just as amazing as those $25,000 weddings. Heck, my wedding dress was $750 alone.We didn't get a wedding planner, we were only engaged for 6 months, and it went really smoothly. Both our families were involved and helped out a lot and we were able to find amazing deals. It may be my inner cheap Mennonite heritage coming out, but I think people really don't need to spend so much on a wedding.

My wife and I got married by the justice of the peace at the courthouse. It cost $75. We bought no flowers, no new clothes, no cake, no reception hall, no wedding planner, no professional photographer, no DJ, no catering and we didn't fly anybody in from out of town. We JUST GOT MARRIED. We wanted to be able to focus on getting our mariage right, rather than obsessing over the details of just one day. Not only did we save ourselves a ton of money, we saved ourselves a ton stress!

We spent under $1000 (including our clothes, rings, licences and everything) to elope at the courthouse in NYC. It was great and we had fun!

I bought a long white lace dress from TJ Maxx for like 30 bucks and got married in that. Didn't stick out at all because people don't wear those poofy dresses from the 90s anymore. The wedding dresses of today are just white, long cocktail dresses. Now, people WANT to spend that money on that dress. They want to feel "special". Of course the woman who asked for a 5000 dollar diamond ring won't feel special with a cheap dress. It has to cost more than anyone else's dress in the room. I understand that and respect that. If you feel good doing that, hey who am I to talk. What I am trying to say is, it isn't just the fault of the companies that mark up the prices and rip you off. People want to be told that what they are wearing that day is incredibly special. And they actually want to pay a very big amount to feel like they got what they were looking for.

Nothing destroys marriages more than the wedding industry.

3:14 If there's ever one picture your ANCESTORS have of you, it's the one in your wedding dress. Man, I wish my ancestors had photos of me. Maybe I should mail some back to 1758...

Unpopular opinion down below, if you get upset then sorry ⬇⬇⬇ Weddings are highly unnecessary. Tons of money, making a hundred people come see it, some words and a kiss, immense pressure. Another reason humanity is very unintellectual. What does it do for you? A little less than half of married couples are unhappy with their relationship at some point in the future. Going to a fancy restaurant (or your house if your comfortable with that), having yourselves a feast, and having a close friend ask those magical questions would be much better

My wedding was under $1k. I refuse to participate in this ridiculous cultural status-flaunting ritual. It was beautiful and fun and that is all you're gonna care about in 20 years. Also, the rest of my life with my spouse is more valuable and important than one day. I will have happier days I spent $0 on!

My wedding is in April and with budget of 6,000 we are still 1,000 under budget right now because we refuse to go in debt...DIY is my best friend along with help from family and friends

I don't every want to get married, but I think its unfair for people to judge others on what they spend for their wedding (providing the couple can afford it). I mean, even though the idea of marriage to me is ghastly, I still understand that for others its very important and their wedding day is expected to be one of the highlights of their entire life, surely that justifies a couple trying to make it as perfect for them as possible, and that means high costs are almost always inevitable.

Actually, some study suggests that there's a correlation between money spent on weddings and divorce rate--the more money spent, the higher the chance of divorce.

How great this is to have you, from within this business, come with such a truthful depiction of what is going on and give such honest, blunt advice for future brides and grooms. Thank you. It would be hard to explain here, but this brings me a lot of comfort. I had my wedding last year, in the fall, and it was quite the battle breaking through the marketing techniques to respect my budget.

As a photographer, I do charge extra for weddings. A few reasons why as well as how I set my prices 1) I know their budget is higher as the event. I plan my prices based on overall budget of an event. The impact is minimal, but it is there. The local band will pay less than the big AAA. 2) I don't charge by the hour. I charge one off fees, tax included. So I want to know exactly what you want, and base myself accordingly. I will provide what was agreed upon and nothing more. Weddings demand more. You have specific moments that needs shooting, client usually wants the photos on an album, etc etc. The more work there is to do, the more you'll pay. If I feel there's going to be more than you initially ask for, I'll quote higher. Gonna avoid the annoying "U didn't pay me enough for that" moments. 3) Weddings are not fun. Simple. You get a discount if I get to enjoy the event. The more professional I need to be, the more I charge. And oh god are weddings rigid and professional. Compare that to a concert/nightclub where I get AAA pass, +1 invite for my friends and free booze from the backstage minibar and you wonder why the price doubled. 4) To quote the CEO of Luxotica "everything is worth what people are willing to pay". Photographer isn't that well paying, so i'll grab every penny I can by charging as high as I can. That's simple business. Rule of thumb is, if you get a job too easily, you're priced too low. 5) Finally, time of the event. If I have to re-schedule or cancel something, I'll add extra for it. High demand hours where I know I almost always get booked, or vacation times will cost more. Book me on April 20 (By bday) Halloween, Xmas, NYE or the day of a festival I planned to go to and it will be astronomical.

An average Muslim wedding (Qitab) ranges from $1,500-$2,000 for the entire thing. The most expensive thing would mostly likely the mahr (agreement to the bride from groom) itself. The food is probably made the family, and the Imam (Priest) could be free. Mine was really cheap and my mahr was $1,000.

If your Indian or Bengali, you know how huge weddings are and how much of a big deal it is. You have to invite cousins whom you've probably never met before and never will and all those relatives and even multiple events.

This is the second or third video that RU-vid has recommended about how expensive weddings are. Like RU-vid is trying to discourage me from having a wedding at all 😭😭

Our wedding was pretty modest, planned for 150 people, located in a small town venue, did our own taco bar from Costco, bought flowers from a farmers market, etc. and it was still $10k. Even “cheap” weddings with more than just your immediate family are expensive!

weddings aren't expensive....people choose to blow too much cash because they aren't being realistic.

Pssh please have y'all seen a brown wedding? At least costs 3x more than the ones in this video.

I got married in 2013 at a country club for less than $5000, including the stuff I didn’t pay for such as tuxedo rental and bridesmaid dresses. 50 guests. No one believed how cheap it was. My advice, shop around and be flexible.

and then some people don´t go, and you see all that great food going to waste T_T that´s the real tragedy...

My teacher got married in Las Vegas...in a drive thru wedding ceremony for like $50

I do not understand why everybody just " gets married" and thinks they have to have this costly wedding. Seriously, you dont have to rent some giant ballroom, have everybody dress like penguins, buy a stupid giant cake and the likes. Just meet all your friends and family at a park and have a picnic, or throw some chairs and food in the back of a car and drive up to the top of a mountain. That would be much cooler and cheaper. Traditional weddings are silly

My dad married my step-mom the second month of getting to know her in a courthouse. They married right after my dad got off from work. He wore simple clothing, and he had bought her a simple dress and cheap rings. Small family dinner at a family member's house after the courthouse and that was it. They have been married since 1995 and still going strong. My husband and I didn't care to get married legally but we eventually did after 7 years at the courthouse. We had no rings, I had no dress and it was done right after my husband got off from work. We had no dinner after...nothing. We are still married and have been together since 2008. Remember that a marriage license is a legal piece of paper that doesn't guarantee your marriage will be successful. We always advise to go as simple as possible because if you focus on materials, you take away from the true meaning of marriage which is LOVE.

My wedding cost $2k and I thought that was too much

when i got married, it wasn't that expensive. i got a cheap beautiful wedding dress from david bridal. photographer was someone my in laws knew. cater was someone the in laws knew and we did the ceremony and reception in one location for cheap. honeymoon was covered.

India has the lowest amount of divorce rates because dude you can't clearly afford another wedding unless you are hella rich. And for those people who don't know Indian weddings can go on for days, 3 days minimum.

I once witnessed a wedding party at a night club in a sea resort. Their bachelor/bachelorette parties were at the beach the same morning, then probably went to have a regular reception, and partied the whole night in the club. I'm sure it was less expensive than the standard way.

the biggest reason for my pricing as photographer is that there are so few days of the year we can possibly work. editing, client acquisition, advertising. It's a full time job. So you have to max out your potential earnings on each wedding. And unlike "family gatherings " weddings are way more stressful.

When I get married, I’m just going to go to city hall to sign papers, then go for a celebratory drink

They have difficult to pay the flat/house, but forget about the $20000 lost by the weeding.

Reallt appreciate the honesty in this video!

My wedding cost less than $6,000. I bought my dress online (8 months in advance just in case), it was a bbq style reception so I DIYed some mason jar center pieces that had wet wipes and condiments, all of the decor I made by hand. We got married at a Trap Falls in Townsend MA (look it up, it's beautiful) next to the waterfall, and had the reception at my parents house in NH. The most expensive thing was the food, which was about $2,500 for 125 people, and we did a pig roast which was a huge hit. Next most expensive thing was renting the two tents and tables and chairs , which was about $2,000. When I called into book all of the tents, tables and chairs, I did not tell him it was for a wedding, I told them that it was for a family gathering. Because when I called in a week earlier and told them it was for a wedding (for a price quote) they quoted me $4,000. I used to work in a cake shop and I kept in contact with the owner, who gifted us our wedding cake. My dress alteration was done by a family friend as a present too. All in all, we had an unforgettable day, and walked away debt free. We still get messages about how much people loved our wedding compared to other weddings people have been to. It was so much fun the caterer even came back and partied with us when he was done

Hey, thanks for that! As a wedding vendor I’d like to add that besides we get more work as you explained, in my point of view there’s a key factor that goes within the price: operations. The team that we need to set for a wedding has always to be way more experienced that a regular gathering. Because you don’t have the right to do any mistakes. You HAVE to be PERFEC to achieve a bride expectation and that’s ok, it’s in the job description of a wedding vendor! You have to set a perfect plan B as well, there’s more risk of being sued (yes!), and all of this comes with a cost. Of course we have to nail in any event. Everyone deserves to get what they’re paying for. I’m just pointing that brides always need more attention, vendors get more responsibility and a lot more of expectations to achieve. The prices are a fair reflection of all that.

That's why I'm eloping and spending the money saved on an amazing vacation and maybe a down payment for a house.

A reason I read online was that wedding cakes are typically made differently than regular cakes. Wedding cakes have to sit, usually in un-ideal conditions, for long periods of time. Also, a delivery is preferred so it won't get damaged in transit

We spent about 5.000 euros for our wedding in Greece ( for 100 guests ), which was a really good price since most people spend around 20 to 30.000 euros. We got all our money back, since we asked for money as a wedding gift because we didn't need any more stuff to fill the house. We did some diy stuff but not a lot, since the hotel where we had the reception covered the food, the service and the cake. Even if I had a ton of money I wouldn't spend so much money for just a day. We still had a great wedding day and we didn't go broke. Also part of the money we got back from the wedding we will spend to go to Bali for our honeymoon!

Guess I'm the only woman around here not giving a flying fart on weddings. My husband and I wanted to marry, but not the party with over-sweet cake, never-ending boring speeches, hysterical mother-in-laws and oh the facade! We're so happy happy and in a moment a unicorn wil merge from the woods along with a million butterflies. Hell no, we married without telling anybody, and took a long walk in the moonlight. He's even the first guy I ever met, and we're still together.

Being a millennial I've already thought about it just in case I decide to get married with a party, and one thing is certain: I'm not telling people that I'm planning a wedding. I could book a venue for a "celebration" and it would cost less than a wedding. It would cost less to commission a "princess dress" over buying a premade wedding dress, if it's even something I want to keep (what use will I have of it afterwards?). I could get a cooler and rarer stone in a ring for less than a diamond. I could get catering and an open bar for a "party" and it would cost less. In the end I'd rather plan it out so we could spend less on things like a venue, but more on fun stuff for our guests (like an open bar) and a honey moon

I am loving this channel so much right now

As someone who worked in weddings for years, I can't agree that people are getting ripped off because they are unaware. It's not that hard to do a little research and there are SO many ways to save money and keep things classy and elegant. The people that lose sight of the meaning of a wedding or are really, really lazy are the mostly the ones who spend thousands and thousands of dollars. The best weddings I've worked are the ones who were chill, happy, kept things simple, and invested in the most important aspects.

I had a small Asian wedding, most extended family were not invited. 80ppl on the wedding evening. Total cost £5k and we had it in London. 3 day event. I did a lot of things myself, hand made decorations etc family and friends helped, friends made my flowers and did my photos, it’s how I kept the cost down. Main point is you don’t have to be OTT!

Because women want to be a princess/queen for a day. There I just saved yall over 4 mins. You're welcome. - Sincerely, a woman...who labels herself a queen. DAMN IT EVEN I'M NOT IMMUNE!

I worked for a caterer for 19 years. We did NOT charge extra for different kinds of events. We were an off-site caterer, meaning we took food to the place where the event was being held-few event halls have complete kitchens. This means everything, every plate, fork, glass, steak, and appetizer had to be: Picked out of the warehouse or refrigerator via a packing list, then double checked Loaded on the truck at our shop. Driven to the event hall. Unloaded from the truck and taken inside the event hall. Unloaded from the bin, racks, and transport boxes, etc., and distributed as needed. Tables had to be erected, then set. Food finalized (stuff was cooked in our kitchen, but apps had to be re-heated, arranged on plates, etc.) ** The party happens. ** Then everything had to be loaded back into transport boxes Reloaded on the truck. Driven back to the shop. Unloaded from the truck Washed Placed back into storage containers. Restored in the warehouse. That is a LOT of handling. And someone has to pay for it. So, why don't catering halls have kitchens and staffs to prepare the food and handle all the stuff? It would save a lot of handling? Simple. Most event halls only do 1 event a week, maybe 2 in the busy season. And 70% of the business is on Saturday. How do you hire cooks, warehouse people, dishwashers, and especially servers for 1 days week. These people need to work a 4-5 day week like everyone else. They can't work at more than one event hall, because they are all rented out at the same time, Saturday afternoon and evening, 70% of the time. So we had a full-time kitchen and warehouse staff, and the servers worked part-time. BTW, one way to save $$ on events, especially weddings, is to do them off season. The Season varies by area, so ask around for when the slow season are, and see if you can get a discount. Also, someplace give discounts on Sunday weddings.

In some parts of my country, weddings are a 3 to 5 days of party. This parties tend to be huge with a lot of family, friends and even strangers coming and the couple have to give them a place to stay but also food, drink and music all day. It seemed to me a huge spending just to entertain but there was a catch. In between the dancing and presentation of musicians, the couple will start to present and open the gifts, the bigger were the first to be opened and things like refrigerator, TV, a set of couches, etc. Someone even gave them papers for a new house and another gave them a car in those gift openings. It was really an spectacle to stay just to see what was going to show up next . And get as much people as possible drunk. Then came things like the guests forming a circle with the couple dancing in the center, with drunk guests randomly approaching the couple to put money in their clothes, and all I could see was bills of at least 50 dollars of worth covering them. That's the trick, you have to approach the couple at some point, if you don't put bills, it would seem you are a stingy person in front of the crowd. And that's how I lost a lot of money that week but it was entertaining and amazing to see that after this wedding, the couple is all ready to start their new life with everything they need.

Hey Anne Barge, my ancestors are never going to look at photos of me... BECAUSE I WASN'T BORN YET. I'd be wary of purchasing wedding products from someone who gets recorded in an interview about their products using antonyms for what they really mean. Lolz.

Historically, wedding comes from religion concept, if you're not religious people (atheist/agnostic) and live in western countries, Why bother??? I know there is _marriage without religious content carried out by a government institution_. But, what for? commitment? prevent breakups? parenthood? There are so many marriage failures out there. In certain (eastern) countries yes the procedures are needed for having a child at least.

Another cool video from Vox.

My cousin is a party planner and I help her with some of her projects so I understand some of the time, effort, and energy that goes into events, let alone weddings. If you're having a large gathering, expect a big price cause you have to worry about food, supplies, decorations, and so much more if it's a wedding. But there are a lot of swindlers out there so you have to be careful.

Me and my husband got married at the court house and spent our money on our house car and honeymoon and our rings. as for photos for once in a lifetime pics we did get wedding photos but I got them done free because I'm a model and know photographers

This is what I took from this video.... I wonder how much it would cost to get into the Wedding Venue business?

In India an average wedding costs around 65k and lasts for 2-3 days.We usual have around 300-500 guests, because it is a once in a lifetime event (divorce is very very rare) which is meant to be enjoyed with all family members and have a good time.

The expensive wedding is a total scam. Imagine what you could do right now with an extra $30,000. Pay off some debt? Buy a new car? Put a down payment on a house? I guarantee you aren't thinking about throwing a one time party/religious ritual/family reunion get together where you only like 5-10 of the 200 people attending, that will be an absolute nightmare to plan and which you won't even be able to enjoy because of how much it stresses you out.