We do, we don't run our mouth. We prove and practice to perfect. I don't tell people what I can do and have mastered the art of playing dumb until I can shock people.
all I can tell you is I am hated by most men as they have become emasculated beyond words and most women because of their low self esteem, and it saddens me so, it's the over all confidence I have and straight forward talk that I think does it, not to mention I am in the best shape of my life since finding out who I really am, I honestly would't trade shoes with any of these, to me, unhealthy, ugly looking men or women, it's their envy in me that kills them most, they only validate me and make me push harder to go out to love and serve as many people as I can and always take care of me first, mentally and physically
@Diane C Not one for politics, but you are a Trump and Giuliani supporter who thinks looks mean everything. As a male infj, I wouldn't want you regardless of what you looked like. You have negative energy and give off the entitled vibe.
I told my now ex-husband this time and time again. I told him it took far more strength to be nice, and generous and gracious instead of animalistic greed or 'me first' mentality. I don't know if he really couldn't get it, or didn't want to get it.
From my experience as an INFJ: People often underestimate me as I don't go on boasting in front of people that I know something until I master it to my satisfaction. By the time I would have mastered that skill I would be far ahead of those people and I think that makes them jealous. People think our humbleness as our weakness until they see our capabilities. And, once they see what we are capable of they feel insecure.
Exactly exactly! Exactly-fucking-lyyyy!! People underestimate me and I always prove myself better than them. They find it hard to digest and hence hate me! Get jealous! Make fun! Demean me! Insult me! And when they cross their limits, I leave them.
Bingo, i could have the cure for cancer or i could have no idea what im doing and ill have the same fun loving nonchalant way of being. And ill never tell someone i know something unless i know EVERYTHING about said subject.
I dont like gossip, Im well-mannered and dont like to hurt people AND for some reason this makes certain people hate me. I think its people who hate themselves.
Me too. I hate gossip, am celibate( they don't believe me)...they have tried repeatedly to "set me up" just to test me, they have failed. With work, this describes me and my situation at work exactly!!!
Ive tried both, gossiping back to them and staying silent. Better to stay silent but neither actually worked. Envy is a bad one because they dont recognise their envy, too busy blaming their target for everything and anything i guess.
I feel like a hot topic shirt. "Does not play with others." I'm self disciplined alright but the problem w/ that is ill only operate on my time. But yeah, I don't really think anyone could torture me. I'll do that plenty enough on my own. Overthinking actually helps me tho... it just means I'll hafta find my way through. No matter the hurt. I guess I really am the stoic kind. I don't try to be mysterious. I'll just absorb & act accordingly. These things are kind of fun. It's like astrology 🤣😅. I'm so "low key", low key anti ppl, I don't even want ppl envying nothing. It's wasted energy & it creeps me the f out...
Same here. I used to think something was wrong with me until I finally realized something is wrong with THEM. I would hide out in my house and refuse to go out in public much (let my husband do all the shopping etc). Not anymore!! I walk into the local stores with my head held HIGH now!! 😄
That very thing caused me a lot of anxiety when I was younger. I just couldn't understand why other kids didn't like me even though I was quiet and shy.
Same!!! I was thinking about why my friends ended up hating me in secrets until I found this video and found another INFJs feeling the same way that I do 😭
The supernatural gift of an INFJ characteristics that God has blessed me with,grows stronger the closer I get to GOD. I'm truly grateful and thankful of this gift.
I resisted God for 45 years and was astonished to realize He continued to protect and pursue me while I was an Atheist. I am now 74 and very grateful He did not give up on me.
All the time I seem to trigger envy in people and I’m always layed back. I tend to downplay my goals around people because I sense the envy coming and it’s exhausting. I don’t brag or boast about anything when I know certain people already don’t want to see you succeed.
I learned this lesson very early, started in junior high , and ask mother why people always seem to act weird around me , her reply : they are jealous of you and it will no doubt always be that way with you , but they have no reason to be jealous of me, I struggle and struggle, yes you do , and they cannot do that so they get jealous, just learn to deal with it and remember this: as people often copied what I did and it made me angry , rely imitation is the highest form of flattery, go tell that to those fff mean dumb ass girls I know that bore me unto tears. I always want people to succeed, but if you do not , that is your fault not mine as I am always working and planning and you never do that, btw, they hate hearing the truth and I love telling them the truth! I got the SHINE! THE IRISH SHINE ! AND ONLY ABOUT 2 OR % OF POPULATION IS BORN THIS WAY! SO THE SHINE ,INFJ( BUT NOT ALWAYS AS IT CHANGES ) AND OTHER TALENTS , AND IT IS NOT ANYTHING BUT A GIFT?? AND A CURSE( A CURSE FOR A FACT BUT IT KEPT ME ALIVE AS KNOW WHEN HOLD , FOLD AND DAMN SURE WHEN TO WALK AWAY, WALKING AWAY IS SOMETHING I DO, I JUST LEAVE AND OWE NO ONE A REASON WHY, AS THEY SHOULD KNOW AND IT BORES ME TO CONSTANTLY BE AROUND THESE BORGS AND LOW AND MID WITS !
Oh I frequently get the " there's something I don't like about her" especially at work coworkers think I'm the bosses favorite but I'm just an intelligent , competent employee.
INKNOW RIGHT!!!!!!! Even when I try to explain it to my therapist i end up just shutting up because I can’t figure out a way to say it that doesn’t make me sound totally woo woo or obnoxious!
My relentless perfectionism in all areas of my life definitely causes strong reactions from some people. No, I don’t think I’m “better” than you, I’m just trying to be a better me.
I was using a rowing machine at gym once and had a strange lady approach to tell me, "Wow, I can see by your body type you would get really fat if you didn't work out!" This kind of belittling/undermining is something I experience often - whether it be from colleagues, neighbours, acquaintances or total strangers. 🤯 It's confusing because it happens while I am engaged in the most mundane activities. Just minding my own business.
I agree with you 100%. My neighbour purposely beliitled me on my birthday last year. Since she doesn't know the date of my birthday that means it was the demonic spirits inside her that was controlling her. These types of people are filled with legions of demonic spirits and should be avoided like the plague.
That snoot deserves a come-back, like "I wonder what would make you think it's OK to say a thing like that." Yes, I wouldn't likely have been able to have un-dropped my jaw from the floor fast enough to retort, but Ack! What a boundary crasher.
@@PSYCH-O I ask people to stop if I find their behaviour unacceptable. If they continue things may escalate. I never mean to hurt anyone but sometimes it just happens
My husband is an INFJ...I've learned a lot from him and his great examples. Yes, some people try to make absurd remarks about his appearance, and habits but he's not triggered. Highly analytical, providing calm responses, always logical. A great relief in this world full of egotistical and hedonistic people.
I agree with this. We definitely trigger weird feelings in other people. They look down on us as there isn't visible accomplishment in a grandiose sense to begin with. But the results we achieve seem unlikely and attract jealousy
@@reesedaniel5835 they are never gonna know that, I don't talk about my hardships with anyone but myself. People think I have such a calm life when I have been through sea storms in a wrecked ship🙂
and what they hate the most is that we don't really care. They feel like they can get a reaction out of us by being mean but we're just like "sure, okay if you think so" just because we understand emotions much better than others.
I’ve been told by a boss that “you definitely march to the beat of your own drum.” What does that even mean???? That was when I was trying REALLY hard to fit in to company culture 😂😂😂😂 So what do I look like when I’m just doing me???? I rub my bosses the wrong way, but I’ve never been fired. I work too hard, and I’m too dependable.
I’d guess that you’re an intelligent, self-driven and independent thinker. Corporate culture encourages and rewards loyalty to the company but appears to us as brainwashing. I may be wrong but that’s my sense of it. Take it as a compliment. You’re a self-contained individual in a cookie cutter culture.
This is why I have had so many jobs in my life and made to feel that I am not good enough, regardless of how hard I work, the quality of my work, and how well I get along with everyone. It just takes ONE person with a bit of power or liars to make your life miserable enough to make you leave. Always made to feel like I do not belong of course!
Wow! I was just thinking something like this today and I feel your comment has be written with my life also. I appreciate reading this. Really helps. God Bless you on your journey in life continually, In Jesus name, Amen!
I've somehow triggered envy in superiors by staying in my lane and doing everything i can just to be supportive. I sense that these individuals have a desire for me to "screw up" so they can internally legitimize their negativity relating to me. These people will constantly assert their authority despite me never challenging it. I'm still struggling to figure out "why"...
I always have issues with normal ppl as INFJ, they don't seem to understand me, further, i can't bear that usually sneaky, untrustful, unserios behaviour from many other ppl...it drives me crazy.
Countless individuals seem to have been envious of me for one reason or another. Some were obviously envious. Even saying so, to my confusion. I couldn't figure out, what, exactly, they were envious of.
Yup. I definitely trigger envy in certain kinds of people. These are NOT subtle people either. It actually becomes funny watching these people purposely act different around me. Even funnier watching them cope when their playpen bullying tactics don't work. Can't imagine the amount of effort it must take for them to nurse and maintain such a poisonous feeling. But then, I noticed that these people have something in common. I am comfortable with myself, independent, articulate, and I can reach goals I set for myself within my own timetable with my own way. But these palpably envious people aren't comfortable with themselves and need to be buoyed by others. Yet despite all the people who hold them up, they can only seem to get so far. I must admit that I alternate between pity and disgust when regarding these people. Seems they have not yet learned to better themselves.
I've noticed that those types of people watch you intently, just waiting for you to trip up, make a mistake or do something they can easily misinterpret and spread lies about on you.
@@reesedaniel5835 They are also likely to have ambitions grossly disproportionate to their morals and talent, and are normally not above sucking up to bosses. They are creatures of pride.
@reesedaniel5835 indeed... we've experienced a tremendous amount of injustice in our lives everywhere and anywhere we go... yet, we're one of the most positive, upbeat, kind, compassionate people around AND always willing to help those in need.
I am one of these INFJ's. I asked someone this very question. He said that human nature is really strange, but other people will get triggered by jealousy when you do not own your power. This is a major characteristic of this personality type. We just like doing positive things because it is the right thing to do. But this sends out vibes that get misunderstood by other people. This person said that when you own your power, people respect you. I am not good at "owning my power" either. It feels like a lot of conscious effort when I would rather devote my energy elsewhere. But this is something that I need to consider to grow. INFJ"s are the ones who like to do their jobs well and not try to assume leadership positions We avoid the issue of power and focus on just being good and doing good. We become really good at what we are doing. But without owning our power, we trigger jealousy in people. We are supposed to be the ones in power, in higher places. So this is a lesson we have to master...to be respected, not the target of jealousy. On the other hand, if it may really feel like being more preoccupied with power and owning our power is kind of a waste of time. If owning your power is contrary to your nature and your consciousness, then the other way around this is to work harder on your goals, your projects etc. till you produce results that really outshine everyone and no one can touch you...power by positioning. Power by positioning is one way to get out of power struggles with people in your immediate environment.
Also when we are about to undertake something important at work I tend to be " What if this or this happens" And my colleagues say "stop panicking" And every time I have to tell them I'm not panicking I just want to make sure all bases are covered
Exactly! I have even heard a comment from my colleague "Why are you so negative?" I'm not a pessimistic person but someone who likes to deliver top notch work.
Most out of jealousy, hate, bitterness, etc. Just stay away from certain ppl who are envious or sending you the evil eye or wishing you harm, etc. Always protect your energy. Always guard your heart. Set some serious boundaries. No compromises.
I think when people upholding social facades compare themselves against us and our unabashed authenticity, they feel a bit unmasked and that can be unsettling and upsetting.
Another great video, very relatable. Another reason I have suspected is because I am not overly concerned about others' opinions about me. Some people seem to feel threatened by that.
I have learned that calm quiet confidence intimidates a lot of people and can also provoke envy and anger in them! The reason is because most people are always in need of other people's acceptance and validation and they envy people who do not seek OR NEED validation outside of themselves! One of the things that I have learned in life is that there are so many people walking around with FAKE CONFIDENCE........... totally INSECURE and unsure of themselves within! There are so many people who are not happy with themselves or their lives.........but they pretend to be so that they can get acceptance and praise from others! It puzzles people to see someone dancing to the beat of their own drum and not being moved AT ALL by the drums of others!
I actually do care what people think about me, but not enough to act against my values. It can lead to me closing off, or if i feel cornered, I will say something I immediately regret. In reality I just want to do my thing in peace, and don’t understand why other people want to control everyone else.
Yes, exactly. Even in some situations when I thought there's nothing to be envious of there've always been people who envied me just for being different :-)...
It is one of my goals, never to trigger envy. No conflict, whenever I can manage it. My peace is exceedingly important to me. That way my senses are working in prime order. I do not need to be right. I need to be happy.
In my experience, it’s because of the level of self-confidence/authenticity I operate with. It’s seems to be very triggering, for those who are faking it, at any level. I can’t count how many times I’ve been accused of “disassociation” type behavior, because even in the times of the worst circumstances, I’m still calm. It’s really horrible, to experience the loss of a loved one, and be accused of being cold/disassociated/stoic, by those whose grief unravels them.
It is so impressive watching the modern psychology community over the last maybe 10 years, even manage to plumb the depths of my own personality as an INFJ, considering how rare it otherwise is that anyone typically even knows we exist. Prior to these kinds of conversations, the feeling of being from another planet could be quite extreme, but I can definitely approve this summary of some of our traits!
I have often been looked at sideways when people see how I breeze through life, capable and unbothered. Some who don't connect dots well don't realize my biggest power is weaving webs. I envision the relationships in my life almost like a chart. I know exactly how much give and take I have in or over someone's life. I constantly watch the people around me and the problems they face and watch to see how they resolve those problems. So, later in life, when I am faced with challenges I am actually prepared to handle everything that comes my way. In a way, these events are like spells in a spellbook; and I am able to destroy obstacles in my way for everyone to see. And that does cause envy in some people around me. I try to pay attention closest to their needs, because they are a weak point in my web and I need a strong web.
I always wondered why I was able to see other people do things/make mistakes and in turn, avoid those things or handle them based off what I watched from their experiences; even when I’ve never experienced the same prior. You’re totally right. They are genuinely like spells in a spell book haha!
My own mother was envious of me while growing up. I think that she thought that I made all of my successes look easy. When I was older, I was so self sufficient that my mother thought that I always had rich boyfriends who were paying my way/rent. She so jealous that she tryed to destroy me.
Me too. Once she said that I didn't let my fear stop me. I didn't understand what she meant at the time. Makes me wonder what she would have been if she hadn't let her fear stop her from being her best self. My mother did everything she could to make my life as hard as possible, too. I won the National Merit Scholarship but couldn't use it because they wouldn't take me off their income taxes even though I had to move out when I was 16 to finish high school. Her and my dad would search my room for my school books and burn them if I brought any home. So, I'm used to being sabotaged. That's why I'm happier alone.
People are always envious of me and that’s why I choose my friends, my time, and I focus on personal development and celebrate it with high achievers as well for they’re the ones who influence and inspire greatness. Frequency is contagious so vibe with people who lifts others.
8:44. This is so true. I have never understood why people do things to impress others while messing up their ownselves in the process. And also greed for more money, not letting people have their piece of pie. I have never understood these traits. This is an excellent video. Tells me I'm not alone.
Even my driving route for the next day is well thought out for the quickest and most efficient way to get there. Especially during rush hour, I do my best to plan around routes that have left turn without traffic lights. As far as clumsiness and mistakes go, certainly I am. I choose to look at a mistake as learning. My clumsiness I turn into a joke to brighten someone's day.
Yes 🙌. I have older siblings and my mom who are extremely extroverted 😮. They were abusive and mistreated me. I never 😢understood why! 😮. Recently, it was revealed it was jealously. This video 😮explains it one step further. Thank you! ❤😊🎉
im infj and i find its my steadfast ethics that upset people, i think people see me and it makes them feel like thier bad. i have herd untrue bad things said about me many times
Up until now I never understood why people want my life. As soon as I achieve my careful plan, someone is trying to take it away, and I give it to them, because surely they need it more than I do since they are willing to connive and sacrifice their very soul.
An INFJ, this may seem a really odd thing for me to say but I, now a pensioner, have decided from a lifetime of being ignored, belittled, insulted and taken advantage of, that we have general traits which others aspire to but know they will never possess. The reaction of many is so positive that it can be embarrassing but, even at this age, I still provoke the afore - mentioned negativity.
Well said. I'm still waiting for the positivity though! Have you noticed that people project their negative baggage onto you? I'm baffled when I hear how I'm perceived by others.
Everywhere I go there’s always a sense of hatred towards me. For some reason, I’ve just gotten used to it. No one ever explains why, I just gotta figure it out after the fact.
Not just noticed by me, an INFJ, but my close friends (ENFP, ENFJ, INFP and INTP) have noticed incidents of envy/jealousy towards me on different occasions. Especially, my ENFP friend has a good radar for this.
I am definitely an INFJ but I do not feel unflappable on the inside. Nor do I see myself as well accomplished. Certainly not as much as I would like to be. The tendency toward advocacy and protectiveness was not particularly highlighted, though altruism was stressed. This applies to me in abundance. I am getting out of a 30 year marriage to a covert narcissist, who sucked the life out of me and discarded me for a much younger, foreign female, so I am not able to see my strengths at this writing. But I definitely do not know how good I am at the best of times, nor do I feel the need to live my life in competition with others. That is in large part why the estranged spouse desperately needed to triangulate me with this other individual. I do need my solitude and am very self directed. However, I burn myself out doing for others. Blessings to everyone.
@@maryrudy4046 TY. I send you loving thoughts and blessings. You certainly deserve them. TY so much for showing love when you were denied the same. ❣️❣️❣️
Many years ago I was very surprised and a bit offended to learn that a person I only knew through friends had called me "fake." Although she wasn't in my inner circle, I have turned this over in my mind and see now that integration is the task of authenticity for an INFJ. I realize that I have many reasons for not sharing all of myself with anyone: conservation of energy; maintaining boundaries; being there for them; and yes, mediating struggle. That is why I find the MBTI so useful, because I get to work on the natural struggles of my personality. And of course I said work on myself, that's what we INFJs do! 😊
I have most ETJs I met playing dirty schemes to abuse/bully me/keep me away from praises, recognitions, and admiration, including my mother and my sister. I realized it’s my Ti that constantly challenges their Te and my Fe intimidates them especially in social situations. I spent decades to finally realize I did not do anything wrong trying to be a good person in every way I could but it was their jealousy.
Yes, people project their negative emotions and thoughts and insecurities onto us, and our humility is seen as weakness, so we tend to be bullied. I'm still learning to have healthy boundaries. 🙏💝🐦🎶
Do I think I have "ever" triggered envy in "someone" ??? I know I have been on the receiving end of it from hundreds of people, starting with my own mother. It's not pleasant - people who feel envy tend to express it in spiteful actions, and our empathy means we feel a lot of hurt. it' exacerbates the Introversion, in the end, we tend to stay solitary out of self protection.
We don't need others we like do things by our selves and we don't always give time to the attention seekers. I can be cold from apathy or you crossed me too many times. I think the cold side of the infj and the I don't need your help attitude can make people not like you. I can't help it, I don't like help unless I really need it. I do better by myself. The people that do best in a group don't like us because they don't understand us.
After a very abusive long relationship, I have learned to be very cautious of what I share about myself. I maintain boundaries at such a level in such a way to protect myself. Part of that comes into I don't let people know enough about me to be jealous. If anyone is jealous I am not aware of it.
I would imagine taking credit for a achievement would be difficult for one of these people, modesty to a fault. Hence a lot of the best achievements that we see are taken for granted.
Aa a mature INFJ , there is no problem in taking credit for anything I've done, but I do not boast or make myself appear above anyone else as I am secure in who I am and my abilities. If anyone else contributed, I would make it a point to acknowledge the contributions of the other person. Now someone taking credit for my accomplishment is a sure fire way to get my attention and get my hackles up, as that is very narcissistic trait.
Yes, and i can never understand why, when i m just being myself. That last part is so true though. The minute i think i m just gonna do whatever without thinking, it goes wrong. Like literally, i could drop a knife and it falls into my foot. I ve tried it a couple of times, now i don t any more. I saw it as god warning me not to take life for granted. Now i understand it s probably also my infj ness.
BEING IN A WORLD THAT WE LIVE IN? BEING "DIFFERENT" IN ANY WAY WILL ATTRACT HATRED.😢 I'VE LEARNED TO EMBRACE MY TALENTS AND FLAWS. DESPITE HOW OTHERS FEEL ABOUT IT. I SPENT TOO MANY YEARS NOT. NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN! I NOW KNOW WHY I'M DIFFERENT AND I'M NOT LETTING ANY HUMAN FLESH MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT IT. DON'T YOU ALL HERE DON'T EITHER!!!🎯🎯🎯💯💜😘😘♓️👑
Even disregarding whether people envy INFJ (and yes, unfortunately, it seems somehow I have managed to trigger that reaction in people and to quite a destructive extent in some cases, which I try to avoid, but it seems it is quite hard to second guess where the next form of it will appear) generally there's useful information in here, in terms of understanding how it works if you find you have INFJ traits.
As an infj I have jealousy of a few. It's normal to wish you had what others had. I like to think someone is jealous of me for a change, that would make me feel better but I know with jealousy it means you secretly want bad things to happen to that person to bring them down to the pit where you are. It's not Godly and it's cruel. I am ashamed of myself when I catch myself wishing something bad on someone.
I don’t really care about that , however again the accuracy of this description of thee “enigmatic INFJ” personality type is even more enlightening and clarifying than ever. Really clear and actual, just “true”....basically. It ‘a like a combination code figuring out or understanding that this is an actual phenomenon of being. It seems very like ethereal and especially with these video excerpts like NOT AT ALL, so. This one really refined and specified my understanding and association with this mbti personality classification type more than ever. (Impressive). This creator is 50% super empath 50% social scientist, rather apparently. Really quite something (this channel ) very transcendent and amazingly tangible and pertinent, as well .🤔🙏✌️
I mostly feel sad because i think people don't like me. It is a lonely feeling and i am already lonely. I yearn for a partner but need to feel some attraction to the person. Unfortunately those i am interested in are not interested in me. People are so negative on dating sites. Sometimes i wish they would zip it and quit ruining things for some women. These men deserve to stay single till they are old and in diapers lol
I just realised my ex was envious of me. He always brought up how amazing I was to him, how easy I made everything look and how little he thought of himself. No matter how much I tried to validate him and assure him he never felt good enough. He cheated on me in the end. Hahaha go figure
I took my entire post secondary by distance education. It suited me fine. I had no trouble motivating myself and best of all, I set my OWN standards. I had no idea how everyone else was doing and that was great because they didn't know how I was doing either....so no envy or sabotage. I graduated top of my class and got an award that my narc husband immediately belittled. In the workplace I still set my own standards but when someone makes some offhand comment indicating jealousy, I dial it back. I'm in my 60s now and don't have to prove anything to any body.
