Why I Stay Married To My Transgender Partner 

“Go and love someone exactly as they are. And then watch how quickly they transform into the greatest, truest version of themselves. When one feels seen and appreciated in their own essence, one is instantly empowered.” -Wes Angelozzi

Growing up, my mom would tell me a story about her teacher who transitioned to a woman, and her wife stayed happily married to her. This was the 70s and you can imagine the social backlash. My mom admired them and their love so much and it was a powerful story I heard growing up in the 90s. Here's to you both and your everlasting, all powerful love ❤

You are an incredible, incredible woman. Your partner is beyond lucky to have you. Your videos are also so well structured, informative and brilliantly edited. You speak so well and so confidently with nothing but understanding and compassion, it really is a breath of fresh air.

I thought I was open minded and accepting of the trans community until my child came out to me. It is a very different acceptance when it's not an abstract idea but someone you love. It's hard but they're still the same person deep down. If you truly love that person, you want them to be happy.

Its just so beautiful that even coming from a mormon background you can see the most righteous and empathetic thing to do is accept and support LGBTQ people. Your channel really sets a great example for religious people with long held beliefs to hopefully question their views. Very beautiful couple and family ❤

As a trans woman this is how I want to be loved

I think it's wonderful that LOVE is what is keeping you two together.

I've watched a LOT of transgender related content on youtube. And without doubt, this is the most inspiring, loving and beautiful story I've listed to. Shaye is so lucky to have you as her wife. If I ever meet anyone half as kind, intelligent and compassionate as you, I would be over the moon. I wish both all the happiness in the world.

This was so well stated and well done. There are so many people who need to hear this message. By supporting people to be themselves, lives are saved. Sending you a standing ovation and sharing this for others to see!

My wife and I are both 60 I came out seven years ago after 34 years of marriage. She has the same feelings you have. I am just father in my transition the new wife is, as you stated, you love the persons, heart, not the body❤

Just found your channel and am so glad I did ❤. I am trans woman and my wife and I have been together 12 years. Seeing someone else go through a similar journey of transition and faith change , just brings so much visibility to a journey I felt I was navigating without much of. Thanks taking the courage to be so public with your lives. Excited to explore the channel and wish both you and ur partner the happiest of lives!

Your growth and intelligence through this is amazing and admirable. I hope more and more partners of trans people are open to developing a new normal with their partner like you have with your family.❤️

I think for some people they don’t think of how supporting someone can mean different things. As a queer person myself, if my partner told me he was trans it wouldn’t change my feelings. We would have a lot of growing to do and change to work through, but that’s ok. In your family support has meant staying together, which I love. I’ve also known couples who after one came out as trans their romantic relationship ended, but they continued to support their former partner as friends, sometimes co-parents, etc, because they didn’t break up because they had issues with their former partner being trans, they just weren’t compatible romantically anymore which is also valid. Love sometimes evolves as we grow as people, and that’s ok. We can support people we love in so many ways.

What a beautiful testament to tolerance, compassion, and the enduring power of love.

Love your idea of "Humanizing" trans people (but of course some of us have always known that we are all humans first of all and everything else about us comes next). I totally agree that by supporting our transgender community we are uplifting humanity in general. And although I don't call myself a Christian I am absolutely sure this is what Jesus (and the Buddha and Krishna) would have wanted us to do and would have done themselves. Your story and strength is so inspiring and even more inspiring knowing that you are both ex-Mormons. 🙂

You are a beautiful couple navigating some really big transitions together. I appreciate and honour the way you are sharing your journey with such sincerity . I wish you both so much happiness ❤

Wonderful video. I’m a 61 year old transgender woman I started transitioning @ 58 year’s old. Nothing about being transgender is easy but I’m lucky I have the support of my wonderful wife and children. We celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary in September and yes our relationship has changed but we are more committed to each other than ever.

I very rarely comment on yt videos. Your story and this video really moved me. I was sobbing by the end. Thank you for putting this out here.

You’re such a great narrator/public speaker. Love your stories. I’m sure you’ll help so many ppl and I feel you can change minds out there.

I live in the same town and so I know that things have not been easy for you and Shaye. I am a Christian (Lutheran) and I agree with you that Jesus would be behind you supporting you both. I wish you and your family all the best and that any negativity by others avoid you all. I'm in my 70's and the world is very different from when I grew up in the uptight '50s. Some people are afraid of change or anything they don't know about. Thank you for putting this out there and I hope it will educate people and give them understanding.

So glad you’ve found peace. I love your videos, seams like you’ve come along way since morman stories too

I LOVE THIS VIDEO 🥹♥️ such incredible points. thank you for sharing another very personal part of your journey/life Amanda! Sending love to your beautiful family!

I don’t know how this channel came on my time line but it is wonderful. The way Shay explains self acceptance and not fighting the tide. Resonated with my soul. I’m compelled to look at other videos as I still work toward with finding the joy I desire within.

I love ALL OF THIS! Thank you for sharing your story so openly! WOW!

This is absolutely beautiful and I am so grateful to both of you for being so honest, open and vulnerable - which to me = brave - in order to help educate this often narrow minded, rigid society. All peace and love and truth to you and your family. Look forward to your next video! I hope healing is going well and I admire all of you. ☮️❤️🌷

This is one of the most important videos I've ever seen. May every single person in the world see it and UNDERSTAND. Thank you so very much!

This video is so beautiful and wise !!! I watch all your videos about your transition journey and they have touched me deeply!! I am so so so happy for Shaye that she finally can allow herself to be herself and that she is so loved while doing so! You are so right: trans is beautiful!!❤❤❤

Brilliant talk, Amanda. If anyone or anything is intrusive it is the criticizing people and the one's intruding in to someone or something that has nothing to do with their ignorant life or thoughts. We are blessed and thank you for the time you spend with us outlining things because you don't have to, but letting us in your world is super cool. How can any outsider or anyone for that matter put down someone's very personal choice about their identity. An identity and choices is so individualized and deserves acceptance only! It's almost as absurd as criticizing someone who is not wearing the exact same clothes or exact outfit as we are wearing. Everyone wakes up every morning with choices what they're gonna wear or what they're gonna do so how can someone not understand those choices are different for everybody. I hope those are good analogies. I have two older self-riteous sisters that I tell you I cannot be around because of their close-mindedness and that is toxic.. i grew up with a critical mom so I vow to never critique my 17 year old daughter no matter what she comes up with. But anyway the moral of the story is live life, be healthy h][_

I love your vulnerability and williness to share your journey. Thank you for sharing and allowing us to celebrate your stories.

This was really really well done. Thank you for sharing your experience and letting us in on your journey.

It’s difficult to think about these things without the traditional binary considerations. At first I was like, ‘so are you now gay?’ But I see that it’s not about that. It’s about commitment, family, acceptance and the literal work of marriage.

Omg......I'm going threw the same thing. Wow this sounds like our relationship. This bring tears to my eyes. Thanks for being you.

Amanda, this vlog is beautifully said. Peace and love to your family. 🕊️💕

You speak so articulate and poignant in this topic. It’s really inspiring you talking about this and hope that it opens many more people’s minds. Love is truly the value that this message holds.

True love. It’s beautiful how you support and accept each other. Wishing y’all the best! 💗

Thank you for being a thoughtful, wise, and discerning person and modeling true compassion, love and a commitment to understanding. Your words and example are powerful examples of how to create a world that is safer, healthier and more full of love for everyone.

So inspiring. Wishing you both well on this journey. Thank you also for sharing the stories and pieces of history that depict the spectrum of gender. I find that fascinating and helpful in bringing awareness that this is part of humanity for much longer than we know.

Beautifully said Amanda. Love is love. Love will conquer all. By you and Shaye sharing your journey you are teaching us all so much. Thank you. 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

Kudos to you honey! Love is love! Your children are very intelligent and know that they are truly loved and not letting gender play any role in this. Praying for the best to y’all! You got this. Love 💕 y’all!

Yes! Yes! Yes! It’s about educating yourself on the subject! Most of us have never had to think about it until you know someone close to you going through it. Thank You so much for sharing your journey, heart, thoughts and education with us!♥️♥️♥️ Much love to you both.

You’re both beautiful inside and out I’m so glad to share this existence with y’all ❤

I admire your honesty and openness. Your words and expression are very well thought out and empathetic. I wish you both a life of love and happiness.

Love is love, it defies, gender, religion, governments and a thousand other roadblocks. SO happy for your family ❤

Found yall today and binging your videos. Yall are seriously beautiful people!! So happy that Shaye has a partner like you. Sharing the experience from your side is so needed. ❤❤ Also, the quality of yalls content is top notch.

"With gender we're all in costume" I love the way you express this and directly take TERF's to task on this issue, this makes so much sense.

Great video. Love the powerful love and empathy, love the intelligence and humor in the editing, what a wonderful example of humanity!

So very proud of you and Shaye , Amanda. Thank-you for sharing your wisdom that you are continuing to gather. Love to you and your family and may God continue to bless you. ❤️

I clicked on this video not sure what to expect and was happy with what i watched. Great job!

Thank you so much for your willingness to share your journey, both of you. Wishing you all the very best.

Shaye and You are extremely fortunate to have one another! This is a very beautiful story and I am so happy to be able to see the strength in your selves and your marriage.

here's to growth, acceptance, and love 🥂 thank you for making this video, amanda.

Congratulations on your transition! I found your channel today and it warms my heart. Your family is beautiful, thank you for standing up for all the trans out there. ❤️

I am so glad I found you guys. You have such a beautiful family and relationship, and even looking at older videos I love your home and your geeky interests!! My favorite channel now

I love this ! Amanda, hope you do not mind that I sharing this link with my support groups ! Bless you two.

I find this really beautiful... The word that kept coming up in my head when watching this video is "unconditional love" - love that is not bounded by any physical traits or label... Love that comes from the heart, without any condition... Thank you for sharing both of your journey... 💚

I can't say enough positive about this video and your kindness and humanity! Thank you!

Hello Amanda and Shaye. I loved this beautiful insightful video. Thanks for making it. My husband and I have relatives and friends in the Pride Community ( easier for me than always saying LBGTQ community because I tend to scramble the letters. ) Anyway, I found this video especially touching. I'm a retired early childhood educator and social worker, who mostly worked in Child Protective Service. I have a lot of experience with children and it's easy to see that your adorable gorgeous kids are happy and well cared for. No one can ask for more!

All I can feel from this video is … LOVE! ❤️ Thank you and your family for that!

This video was so well made, you are so well spoken! The editing was really good too :)

thank you Amanda, I cannot my feelings in words, but your words, how I feel, my confusing gets "words", thank you, please Keep us updated as much as possible

Thank you for sharing your story. As the mother of transgender son, I find hope in your story. I wish you all the best in your journey and may you find the light in the times of darkness.

You are a lovely person. As someone born in the early 60's I never would dream that this would be possible. Things are changing for the better :)

Loved what you said about learning a lot of gender theory and history but how you’ll never know how you’ll react to as situation until you’re in it. You’re very beautiful, empathetic and wise! Thanks for sharing your story!

Thank you for sharing. I think you should write a book about this journey.

I think your take on the situation is beautiful. I wish for all the happiness in the world for both of you! You deserve happiness and acceptance and love!!!

I really REALLY appreciate that you and Shaye share your journey and you answered many of my questions that I had as I followed you through this process. I understand you supporting Shaye, I do too, however, a place I was getting stuck was are your needs being met? You touched on this when you mentioned your attraction and fluidity, if you are comfortable sharing more on this subject I think it may help me and others understand how you can be served in this relationship. You are SO giving, loving, open-minded and supportive and I hope that your needs are not put behind Shaye's, and that you can also be well served in your marriage. I support and applaud you both being brave and authentic and I look forward to learning more from you!

I love the way you talk about this subject! I'm so glad I found you! The way I see it, trans people are showing us what is in need of change in our society! Gender role can be oppressive and not for everyone. In my mariage the role are fluid depending on what makes sense for each other in the moment. Thank for sharing your experience, and mostly to share it with such deep love and calm. It's very healing! Much Love to your family!

I’m very happy for both of you. I hope you continue to grow. I myself a concerned with the transgender movement, but am open to learning. I try to live with as much grace in myself for other people.

thank you for sharing with such clarity, conviction, and tenderness.

This makes me so happy I'm crying I hope for your family to continue thriving and be happy and healthy 💗 💖

Well said Amanda. Ty! I hope Shaye is doing well in recovery and it is so wonderful you have each other. ❤

Your openness and acceptance will save lives. ❤ Originally came for the home content, staying for the complete honesty and strong family unit.

“I definitely feel queer”. YASSSS GIRL!!!! I bawled when you said that!

You’re such a beautiful couple. Makes me sad to see negative comments but you handle them with grace and kindness. You’re very intelligent and I’ve learned so much. Thank you for sharing

Love you guys and that you’re sharing your stories. (Just a side note of love I don’t think you need the memes to back up your voice, it’s loud and important enough just as you are) x

That story is truly something deep and amazing. Thank you so much for sharing so openly

I’ve watched several of your videos this morning, and feel compelled to say how beautiful and uplifting they have been. Thank you for sharing your story with us, and explaining what must be difficult feelings so very, very well. I hope you’ll carry on making family vlogging videos in the future. The open-mouth dog kiss was both hilarious and gross haha! Love to all 🇬🇧

You shouldn't need to explain why you're staying with her. It's your life you do you, we do us no need to explain your love, and affection to Shaye. If people don't think that love can go beyond husband/wife then people need to be quiet. Shaye is just as much a human as we are watching her life. :)

Beautiful ❤ Thank you for having the courage to share your story! You are teachers for all Much Love for your family ♥️♥️♥️

I love this so much. True love that is stronger than harmful social constructs. Watching this made me cry.

My husbands “Mormon parents” (long story and best term we have come up with). The “father” has transitioned to female. She did this in her 60’s which I think is amazing and I’m happy she can live the rest of her life the way she feels. They are still attending the Mormon church, they are still married. They are best friends. They did an interview on a podcast and I cried! The love they have is one that I find beautiful, and I think it’s an example of what a marriage should be! They are absolutely best friends. I think that is the key in the relationship. I think that should be the key in any relationship, but that is my personal 2 cents. Their children have basically disowned them. So we invite them to things because they are important to us and what they have taught me personally has been beautiful and amazing! The person who has transitioned has said “I’ve learned that grace is the key”. It’s not about changing people but helping them understand and accept. They are such an amazing couple and I love them so much!

Wow, powerful. Thank you for your perspective and sharing your family’s lived experience.

This is a beautiful story of your experience. Thank you so very much for sharing. 💜

So proud and excited for the both of you and your entire family! It’s great to see you standing by Shaye’s side. It is very special to have a partner who is so loving and devoted. And most importantly, that you won’t be leaving her or seeking out an intimate relationship with a man outside of your love and bond with Shaye. I look forward to following your family’s journey and wish you all the best!!!

You have a heart of gold! I could listen to you talk for hours💛

I love your honesty, openness and overall curiosity. ❤❤❤❤ Sending you warm hugs and beautiful journey together❤❤❤❤

You really did alot of research. I have family and friends who don't even care to understand people's journey's, but I truly admire your family's story. Loving someone while they feel comfortable to be their true self with you and around you. Thats love. ❤. Hope your family's journey is filled with joy and happiness onward and may every trial make you stronger together 😊

I found your channel through watching your story on Mormon Stories. I really appreciated how much information you both shared about your experience. I feel like i am a very excepting person but was very confused by all the different lables and each personal experiences, but was worried if i asked a question that it would be rude or come across as judging. My adopted son said he thought he was Pan sexual when he was 10 years old. I had never heard this term before because i was living under a rock trying to survive being a stay at home mom and dealing with some other violent behaviors that my son would show. So i had no clue what they were talking about, but tried to reasure them i would always love them, and if they still felt this way when they were older and had a bit more time getting to know themselves we could continue to talk about it. They got older and during the teen years it was super tough for me. My son would get very angry if i asked questions and accused me of not being supportive. I was just asking because i did not know, and was genuinely curious. I really liked your interview on mormon Stories because you did mention that some people are genuinely curious. I am so happy to have found your channel as well. I love how you both are connected, and committed. I am just very moved by this video and what you talk about. I feel i can learn more about this all through your experiences you both share. I hope Shay is doing better everyday after the surgery. So breave and empowering. As for my son, they are 18 now, living on their own. They are on their journey of life, just like each of us are. I feel your videos will continue to help answer some of my possible questions i might have with my relationship with my son. Love what it can become. Thanks.

You couldn't of said this any better! What a beautiful story!! How can you not love this story ❤

My feeling: sometimes adjectives are in the way. my adopted son? adopted daughter? nah.......it's my son! my daughter! same holds true here. my transgender partner? nah......my partner. I marvel at the grace with which your family is traveling the path that'll get you all where you are meant to be. much love.......

So wonderfully explained. Wishing you both much love on this amazing journey.

My partner and I just celebrated our 5 year anniversary and only a few months ago he told me he might be trans (definitely questioning). I already identified as bi (or pan idc) so it wasn’t an issue for me that way, it’s just new and different. I also have been straight passing in this relationship so far, so there are people we would be coming out to who I would also be coming out to. That makes me a little nervous just because dating a guy I just kind of thought with certain people I would never come out to them. I know we are staying together, but I just don’t have many resources or people to talk to about this, so I really appreciate this video and your perspective!

I said thank you after your last video and I’m saying it again after this one… as mum to 2 teenage boys, one of whom is trans, and as a Christian who has had to battle not only with my own preconceived ideas but sadly with my former church over this, I too believe this is what Jesus would do too… I love both of my sons absolutely and unconditionally, and that’s the message I hear in your story too. Thank you both for being strong enough and brave enough to share your story- I really don’t think you’ll ever know how many people you will help and I wish you and your family nothing but love as you grow and evolve together 🌈💜

I love this video ❤ taking time to understand and discovering is a life lesson for many ideas we have assumed were the only way, thank you for sharing your story ❤️

An absolutely amazing example of unconditional love 💕

My husband left me because his family made his choose them or me when I came out as trans. He tried to stick by me for a little while but said that with all the hate I garnered for being out, he didn’t have it in him to walk that journey with me. He said my life was going to be hrs and he wasn’t prepared for that fight, forever. I don’t slight him, not everyone has the strength of character you do. I appreciate you sharing your story so much. You are strong. Your family is strong. Your love is strong. 🏳️‍⚧️ happy pride!

Thank you for sharing your story so that there are more positive light towards our community. Your love goes beyond gender and it’s truly beautiful to witness. ❤

Oh my heart♥️♥️♥️ I cried at the end🌻🌷🌺🌼🪻🌹

You should be commended for your openness and your honestly about your feelings and this journey that your family is on, in a world that is full of judgement and hate. You are very brave. Kudos to you. ❤❤❤❤❤

How beautifully and lovingly spoken. God bless you and your family. ❤