Why we get mad -- and why it's healthy | Ryan Martin

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Anger researcher Ryan Martin draws from a career studying what makes people mad to explain some of the cognitive processes behind anger -- and why a healthy dose of it can actually be useful. "Your anger exists in you ... because it offered your ancestors, both human and nonhuman, an evolutionary advantage," he says. "[It's] a powerful and healthy force in your life."
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10 июл 2019

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Комментарии : 573

@curiouscarpenter3152 5 лет назад

"If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you."

@curiouscarpenter3152 2 года назад

@Luz & Fe Nonsense

@chaseburns8418 2 года назад

This is ment for this people you can't seem to stand up for themselves either mentally or physically.

@user-rx6qz6uf2h 4 месяца назад

I agree with you!!! You either use the anger and rage towards something positive or it will eventually come out in a negative way!!

@maxz8807 5 лет назад

If that title is true, then my dad must be the healthiest person ever.

@Ra-oi2hl 3 года назад

same... :(

@farzanehei604 3 года назад

So it's not true,simple.

@PlanetC64 2 года назад

I admire your sense of humor

@payalkulshreshtha4786 2 года назад

Hahahah 😂😂😂😂

@omarthewizard1344 2 года назад

Lol

@DrPhill26 4 года назад

I didn't recognize him at first but Dr. Martin was one of my psych professors in undergrad, and I can attest that his lectures are exactly like this. Right down to his hatred for roundabouts.

@mobileandroid5299 2 года назад

What are roundabouts?

@faisalalharbi2431 2 года назад

@@mobileandroid5299 an intersection with a circle in the middle

@Siennaalbertina Год назад

Hilarious 😂

@scottyh8494 3 года назад

Anger is an emotion just like the rest of our emotions. We have the power to channel our emotions.

@NR-kz2nj 5 лет назад

This talk was AMAZING, anger let us ACT when we see discrimination or injustice only if that anger is transform into something positive and productive. Wow! Thanks for this video

@OrbitalVibes 2 года назад

And how tf you suppose to transform anger into something productive while in traffic!?

@yummy8074 2 года назад

Also be understandable towards angry people. Anger never comes out of nowhere and people always have a reason to be angry. Don't brush off angry people as being unable to control themselves, because they probably had enough and the burden of injustice is too much to bear for them. Don't think they shouldn't break under so much pressure, you would probably get even more mad if you were at their place.

@Peanuts76 2 года назад

how can you read me? yes, anger it's a sign of something was not right, if you ever facing violations, mock, bully, and you'll keep silent/ avoiding your anger, it probably results in mental illness or some destructive behaviour..... but you define it correctly on people who have anger problem....

@evphex 3 месяца назад

This guys suggestion to deal with anger is to cuck yourself? Im sure that won’t increase anger at all…

@yeseniarobles4289 Год назад

I was born angry. Ever since I can remember I have felt anger, frustration. At first I used to lash out towards others, then I learned that you can harness it to achieve things. It activates your amygdala, it pushes you to look forward to things, like a personal vendetta, it increases creativity because now you’re going after something and there’s nothing that’s going to stop you and if something gets in the way you will come up with a plan to either remove the obstacle or go around it, and it increases performance because now you have the drive!

@ages1010 Год назад

Wow. Well said, Yesenia! I appreciate your elaborations on anger and the benefit it can have. I needed this today

@gerloke914 5 лет назад

Anger saved me from a life of serving people who will do me more harm than good. The one time I let anger go and turn the other cheek I left my job and moved to a bad neighborhood. I lost everything. We are angry because we sense that someone is taking advantage of us. If you don't follow your nature, you won't see the real picture.

@DavidLee-ge3nx 2 года назад

You will lose more.

@lowceyn2875 2 года назад

@@DavidLee-ge3nx No because it stimulate your brain to get better. Life is not lottery, you can manage it

@JustinY. 5 лет назад

"That's my secret Ted, I'm always angry."

@Feber2001 5 лет назад

Same..

@johnmivule-novabow8143 5 лет назад

Hey Justin, found you again

@anonymoususer8387 5 лет назад

Hi Justin Y. 👋

@studiorose11 5 лет назад

Damn Justin is popular 😂

@NJOverclocked 5 лет назад

Where you been

@divyamurugesan5557 5 лет назад

His talk on Anger was creating Smiles😊😊

@laeihbvaljefhbvalejfhbv 2 года назад

I was actually angry watching this lol, I feel better now

@divyamurugesan5557 2 года назад

@@laeihbvaljefhbvalejfhbv Glad you are feeling better now Julian. 🤗🤗

@Chan-tb7sz 2 года назад

Same .

@cart00ner6 5 лет назад

Been divorced 8 yrs, never been angry since.

@melin9799 5 лет назад

"Don't pick a fight with the man with nothing left to lose"

@blucow6677 5 лет назад

so what you're saying is to never get married? here I was feeling a bit lonely lol

@arjun6358 5 лет назад

There's nothing worse than a bad marriage. I have seem my parents go through it, it was soo hard to make it to adulthood

@peakhead7087 5 лет назад

How's your kids?

@millertas 5 лет назад

Been married for over 34 years and in a relationship with her for four years prior to that. I still get angry but not as much as before AND never lonely.

@maliksaleem4242 2 года назад

The main issue is that I get tired of people looking at my mistakes and they tried to judge me and no matter how hard I try to avoid any situation like this I be ending up getting into a fight with them because they keep judging me for something I did wrong and idk why they do that and yet they acting like they never had made a big mistake before in their lives and its true I've been there done that.

@6184aabbcdefg 7 дней назад

How things going on now? I wonder.

@uchihaobito7654 2 года назад

2:32 I Felt that. Like everytime that I got angry I felt stronger than before. It kinda gave me strength.

@d1want34 5 лет назад

Its ok to be angry, its just you need to be aware and take positive solutions to that particular issue

@prestonrobert2625 5 лет назад

I listen to Mexican music problem this is solving itself sometimes even road rage.

@youssefakdim7695 4 года назад

@Allison Bauch The main issue, is that some people are fairly patient, but when someone starts to annoy them in any form, they seem to ignore it or try to convince them to stop... but when it escalates to them starting to get physical, the patient person is bound to unleash

@gablit-gt8kk Год назад

Being angry is being insane

@MariaJimenez-ye9sn 5 лет назад

Beautiful. It was an eye opener. Being labelled aggressive for reasons unknown to the rest. It is refreshing to actually accept that you can get mad. The channelling of the energy is still a work in progress. Thank you.

@veganjotaro 5 лет назад

@SAITAMA but is those people who control their emotions or generally have it easier than others.

@melin9799 5 лет назад

@SAITAMA Angry people are usually trying to be scary. But there's always people out there who are so good at looking calm/happy/etc. that no one can tell when they're not. I'm perpetually pissed. I've done a lot of things that I can't take back. I'm never totally fine. But I've got it all tied up with string. Just. Don't. Pull. The. Strings.

@bruatou 3 года назад

I tend to hurt myself when I’m mad at someone, especially if it’s a unfair situation. the feeling of pain, although i know its not real and just discomfort, and the sight of blood leaking out of my fists seems to calm me down from not hurting people I am angry at. Then I reflect on it and begin to cry and realize I could have probably just sent someone to the hospital out of my anger. I have been dealing with this by powerlifting seriously and bodybuilding to keep me calm and collective. It just makes me really sad though the idea of hurting anyone..

@scorpionmelo943 3 года назад

well, do a search about the lizard brain.... if you understand how it happens, you'll never feel the urge to be angry anymore. i hope it will help, stay strong

@Peanuts76 2 года назад

same, hope i can take your suggestions for me

@angelinal9377 2 года назад

:( 💚

@jenniferduncan3411 2 года назад

Same, I hit my head so I don't scream at customers

@munetoshiyamasaki7536 2 года назад

People who always get mad are actually nice and very down-to-earth people. They don't hid feelings. People who do not get angry easily hide their true feelings.

@munetoshiyamasaki7536 2 года назад

@ItsOnlyDanny I agree. Depend on personal level, but for me I was a destructive kid myself in my early childhood, however now I even care the life of animal and do not even want to kill the ants by foot. I think some of successful people are the opposite of me. They don't even care ants' life, but it they're not self-centered and arrogant, they wouldn't been successful in this cruel world.

@k39564 Год назад

if people who are always mad how are they nice? I wouldn't want to be around someone who is always mad, they are not very friendly.

@vinhmai8416 5 лет назад

Wow, this talk was an eye-opener. I hated how unproductive I get when I'm angry and he just taught me how I can channel it to something productive.

@catsplantsandart5462 3 года назад

i do art its helpful

@perryrobles2615 5 лет назад

Anger is unhealthy if you let it fester. If you do not deal with it.

@christopherneelyakagoattmo6078 5 лет назад

To which many DNA angry people would say, "Mind Your own Business, Sunshine." Sometimes there is no deal. You'd Deal with the Devil and All her Minions and God and Hers: if it would give you one more day. one of those child-like innocent Perfect Days. One more half-day with that Loved one that you've Lost. And how did they die? A lot of pain? Fear? Hate? Confusion? Horrible ways to go. The days before everyone was paranoid about pedophiles. Billionaire Child traffickers that steal, kill, addict, abuse, and destroy lives. Some, he just made disappear. Out the door of the Lolita Express over the Ocean: Shark Alley. Poof gone. she O'D'ed on the Heroine, THAT HE GAVE HER. Little Girls. Allegedly. Mad. Yet? If not. I want whatever Drugs, or religion, you are on.

@manubhatt3 5 лет назад

Many times, generation of anger IS itself the problem, NOT what you do with it.

@gerloke914 5 лет назад

True, then you would run away from your problems and meet the devil. You know. The voices in the head.

@perryrobles2615 5 лет назад

Ger Loke Yup.

@TinoMT 5 лет назад

@@christopherneelyakagoattmo6078 It's a choice, Christopher. You choose to be angry.

@jessxkirby38 3 года назад

Someone give Ryan Martin the noble prize! Well done! Blew my mind!

@OrbitalVibes 2 года назад

What blew your mind? A lot of gibberish nonsense talk about channelling anger into productivity?

@pbinsb3437 5 лет назад

Usually the emotion we experience right before anger is fear. If we spend a little time to explore what we are afraid of we can better understand where the anger is coming from.

@annekerotterdam7499 5 лет назад

And grief!!

@virgin_mary_in_islam2469 4 года назад

The Prophet Muhammad said : When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good; otherwise he should lie down. Abu Dawud Book 036, Hadith Number 4764

@virgin_mary_in_islam2469 3 года назад

@@pmt1489 change the position

@TNord. 3 года назад

Good advice! Sitting down avoids confrontation. And laying down makes it impossible to physically harm others and allow time to think it over first.

@ratanaun2960 3 года назад

This law is great, how many of us follow it? The prophet (pbh) clearly knew that anger is bad, not healthy as this person on TED said.

@ratanaun2960 3 года назад

@@virgin_mary_in_islam2469 He wants both way. This talk is not beneficial to anyone.

@cedricmissonnier 2 года назад

Muhammad is not a prophet of God.

@esmeraldamunoz6262 5 лет назад

It's awesome to be able to share this with students and parents. Thank you for your amazing talk!

@heydavedawson 2 года назад

I can’t help but feel insane guilt when I get mad... this video helps a bit.

@Leto85 5 лет назад

9:58 Lovely line. I've read a similar theory in the book Emotional Intelligence. We adapt our world to ourselves faster than we can keep up with it emotionally because we evolve slower than we adapt our environment, according to that line. I found that utterly interesting because it makes so much sense to me. I like this speech. You came with good arguments and you called me off-guard with that key-commend. :)

@ydnis8374 5 лет назад

One of the best TED talks ever!

@aerodynamicist4 4 года назад

Okay buy why do I get mad when people ask me if I'm mad? Even if I was literally nowhere close to feeling mad

@brigsmith949 4 года назад

Go see a doc

@AldanahDougherty 5 лет назад

I was today years old when I found out there such an occupation as becoming an 'anger researcher.' You learn something new everyday.

@Fahim_Lalani 3 года назад

Remember-Anger is healthy 👍🙏❤️even thinking about this calms me somehow which is cool 😎 plus if I get angry accidentally I can forgive myself more easily. This person is genius

@rudolphiscrying7575 4 года назад

I just wanna say thank you for this man. Because of his talk I can get to know myself more and embrace my anger in a healthu way 😊

@pamlacooper3288 5 лет назад

Outstanding, I’m sharing, thank you Ryan Martin.

@victoryartist1641 4 месяца назад

Thank you for this. We are told to never be anger so are go to response is to shut down. But my dog was being attacked by coyotes and if I didn’t love my dog. I wouldn’t be upset enuf to run after my dog into poison oak to save her from the coyotes. I am also experiencing some injustice that I need to hire a lawyer for now I don’t what to and so wish it could be done just by talking. But I didn’t care about what needed to be done I wouldn’t. So thank you so much. This gives me a sigh of relief. Somethings are worth fighting for.

@melin9799 5 лет назад

It's also important to remember that YOUR anger can be just as justified as someone else's provocation.

@Fbitypeshit 4 года назад

Sean O'Neill so you are saying that if i get mad at someone it’s my fault that he is mad at me because i hate him?

@Huy-ed2re 5 лет назад

Great talk, thank you so much!

@lessatwi1 2 года назад

Best statement- channel ur anger to something productive.

@iknowsomestuff7131 Год назад

I had an experience of using anger productively once : I was preparing for an examination and I wasn't doing good . My parents and teachers criticised me because of my low scores in tests . I felt very angry and ashamed at that time . One day I decided I WILL show them how capable I am , and then I could be the one criticising them for THEIR mediocrity. After an year of hardwork , I succeeded . But by that time I wasn't angry anymore .

@Okratron-rr8we 5 лет назад

I suffer from intense anger but I also have an huge need to hyper analyze every time I get strong emotions. I noticed my anger stems from the times I feel powerless and impotent to a situation. This realization doesn't help my anger much but I have a better understanding about a close family member who has worse anger than me and it's put us on bad terms. I feel powerless because he's so powerless now I'm angry again. Such is life.

@lieuwetop1821 Год назад

heey, thanks for the nice talk! I have this experience to scream and run and feel anger in every part of my body. its never focust on humans or living things. i feel my bounderies and my own motives speaking. taking a stand. and it is the best source of energie to change things in the world. when I let the anger out it is feeling so right! so liberating and natural. i have talked. it feels like strong and powerfull healthy mesculine energy. since 1 year now i am living on the country sight with not to much neihbors and for the first time i am able to espress and scream without concerns of neighbors. i feel how much energie it took me before to deal with that anger. to supress it. i recommend everyone who feels like they hold their anger in. FREE IT!!! LET IT TALK TO YOU!! it helpt to talk to partners and friend who are close. so they understand whats happening. good luck! and enjoy

@ooshma444 5 лет назад

Yes indeed people are always throwing their anger around & abusing others with it & no it’s not ok. They should be getting their anger out cathartically in a way that harms no one yet even when I give clients exercises to do so they never follow through because deep down people are afraid of anger. And most disturbing is how no ever throws love around the same way as they do their anger.

@dumbledoor9293 5 лет назад

I heard "anchor" for a good 1 minute, and thought "yes, finally another person who likes anchors!". When it occurred to me he was saying "anger", I got so mad! And now I have to channel that into action? 😡 HERE YO GO THEN, AN ALL CAPS COMMENT!

@dianaschmitt8854 5 лет назад

Great speaker; entertaining with useful information.

@teaburg 5 лет назад

I ask myself if I will still be angry about something a year from now, yes..then be angry. A week from now, no...forget about it.

@ratanaun2960 3 года назад

You wise. Compassion will arise from this as well.

@GardenFootCreature 9 месяцев назад

I have autism and ocd and it can make every provocation feel like the most unfair and nonsensical thing in the world. I really appreciate Martin’s humour and eloquence

@tatiyana8934 4 года назад

👏👏😘👍👍 - it was many times I've read in comments on TED - "..it was the best speech on TED I've ever heard..." - now, it is my turn 😳 - It was The Best speech I've heard among all speeches I've listened on TED for the last 2-3 years of my experience to choose the speeches, available here - on RU-vid... - THANK YOU!, - 😘👏👏👍👍🌟✌🙏💗

@jakeabel9925 2 месяца назад

Thank you for this video! It actually helped me overcome a ton of large business ordeals.

@QueenEspeon96 2 года назад

What gets me really mad is lack of communication and people who change their minds at the last minute 😤

@cs8782 5 лет назад

I wish I were like you, easily amused.

@26cotocoto 5 лет назад

Thank you Ryan.

@sean8081a 4 года назад

My wife has anger issues, i wind her up and use her as a weapon against the injustices of the world. Believe me, you don't have a weapon as powerful as my wife, she's unstoppable :0)

@barrycharlesbrebner 2 года назад

"Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." the Word of God (Bible)

@jfrd-pw4hk 5 лет назад

People only hate anger when they're not the one having it.

@MESENJAH 2 года назад

So is that your justification for getting angry.

@ps123fan Год назад

wtf, that dosent make sense, it makes sense.... ''People only hate anger when they're not the one having it.'' because no one likes when someone is angry, but they themselves are not angry. (thats why people say, dont get angry, calm down etc) do you like me punching you in the face, no ofc you dont, unless you're a maschochist.

@alenaalena9322 4 года назад

Don’t let your anger permeate your mind and stay in it permanently.

@jackluo3355 5 лет назад

This is the gist. I like this way of treating.

@SWEmanque 5 лет назад

I get angry when my girlfriend hasn't eaten enough. Because when she doesn't eat she is mad about everything, she is mad that she is hungry, she is mad that she has to eat, she gets mad that she doesn't eat so her solution is to refuse to eat... oh, and she is mad about everything anyone does and doesn't do at the same time. So don't let my girlfriend get hungry. That will ruin the day, even though you have tonnes of fantastic food, once she is hungry she is hungry until the next day when her hunger finally overcomes her madness. I have a really difficult time understanding the evolutionary benefit of being hangry.

@mmmk1616 5 лет назад

Oh man, your gf's behavior sounds like it's rough. Or you make it sound worse than it is. I have a friend who gets testy when she hasn't eaten but is just fine after she eats. What you describe is irrational. Maybe bring it up with her sometime, when she isn't hungry, tactfully.

@SWEmanque 5 лет назад

@@mmmk1616 Nah, the best tactic is that simply tell her very angrily to eat, and she may do it reluctantly. She is very aware that she is stupid when she is hungry. No need for taking it up tactfully. :D BTW, she is the worlds kindest girl when she has food in her belly.

@ps123fan Год назад

is she depressed or have high functioning depression? that would be my guess

@kaleidojess 5 лет назад

At 8:13 honestly that’s how it feels when I’m angry

@HumansOfVR 5 лет назад

*_Anger_* is universal, that means it must have a purpose. What is that purpose? stress relief maybe

@Yarblocosifilitico 5 лет назад

self-preservation I think... If you had to fight a lioness you better be angry at it, cos scared you have no chance.

@manubhatt3 5 лет назад

It's only useful when your survival is in some kind of imminent danger.

@michaelcook3168 5 лет назад

It's purpose is to give you the courage to tell someone they are harming you.

@DimitrRaev 5 лет назад

As stated in the video ... anger GENERATE stress. May be cursing can be considered as a stress relief, as it is a form of verbal fight :)

@heavenlymonkey 5 лет назад

The answer is stated in the video: to motivate/energize you to deal with the injustice you are faced with.

@robertm8656 5 лет назад

Great topic.

@minhyegu4 3 года назад

I fell in love with this talk. I love it!

@MESENJAH 2 года назад

Guess you get angry often...

@dillerhiller Год назад

“Fear is the path to the dark side … fear leads to anger … anger leads to hate … hate leads to suffering.”

@ahanafridi2624 Год назад

I get angry 😡 on small talk if it against me. I have a very poor attitude about always keep my self up. I am really fighting to stop this 😢

@williamdevonshire356 3 года назад

i work on a computer and most of the time im on what seems to be a wild goose chase, install this dont install that blah blah blah, anyway i do it all and it still doesnt work... so the problem with that is when you get angry you want to punch people in the face and yell... but when you are on a computer you have to sit still and be very small in the movments with your fingers etc its very exact... also to figure out the problem you have to be calm, because the angrier i get the more difficult it is to understand because im so distracted by the anger... back in the day you can get angry and use it to move a big stone out of the way, or fight a animal or fight your way to the top of a mountain and it was a very big physical thing to live etc... but now it becomes an impediment in that it makes it difficult as i mentioned above

@SilentTrip 2 года назад

I feel the anger... but I can't get it out or express it. People walk all over me because I don't express my anger or protest

@karaokelvis 3 года назад

We have to practice the two greatest virtues: empathy and compassion to alleviate anger manegment.

@urbanwarchief 2 года назад

It's a real shame folks dont understand that these days

@k39564 Год назад

what if I do or at least try , but your partner is not ?

@resilience4lyfe331 5 лет назад

Well said!

@SnowTerebi 4 года назад

The tricky thing is that everyone have their own "justice".

@isabellouise8164 3 года назад

exactly... that statement can be easily taken as a justification for the righteousness of ones destructive rage...

@sylviaodhner 5 лет назад

I don't experience anger, that I know of, except occasionally in a dream. Anger isn't as universal as some people say it is.

@christophmunch4796 5 лет назад

Then hope (and I of course wish it for you) that you don't get cancer, MS or another disease which correlates with suppressed feelings. Read for instance Gabor Mate for more about that.

@xd-r-rex-2307 5 лет назад

You must be Jesus

@christopherneelyakagoattmo6078 5 лет назад

Don't Marry your Soulmate. You will know anger. You only want the best. Outcome. Possible.

@tsunamininja 5 лет назад

@@xd-r-rex-2307 Jesus got angry tho

@sylviaodhner 5 лет назад

@@christophmunch4796 I hope so too, but I don't think that's what's happening. What often manifests as anger to other people makes me cry. I do experience frustration directed at people and situations, but not the physiological characteristics of anger.

@old888 5 лет назад

This is awesome 😍

@taisenscoolstuff732 5 лет назад

People aren't always going to be happy, we're not robots!

@michaelcook3168 5 лет назад

Actually, many of us are !

@jonpadrejuan5357 5 лет назад

anger + resolve = growth

@mehmetbuyukbayram3166 4 года назад

He told very simply things that is known everybody

@tainguyentuan698 5 лет назад

Sometimes i just wanna ignore everything....

@kelterskelter4 2 месяца назад

What makes me mad for the last few years is the guy living above me. His Uncle let him move in and he is just a young guy who can't or won't interact with the world. He sits in the bedroom which happens to be above mine. He thumps and bumps his video game whenever he hears me making any kind of sound. He runs the power drill along the wall or bathtub, he kicks door stopper. He never goes out and he is always waking me up between the hours of 10pm and 5am. I can feel his anger running down my walls. He fights with his Uncle who even wants him out. But he has no where to go. His parents unceremoniously dumped him on my head for me to deal with. He only goes out for necessities and has no social life whatsoever. Only the internet.

@karanjeetchohan8210 Год назад

Agree with the roundabouts

@jeffersondavis9415 5 лет назад

I'm the happiest person

@davidpeacemeister1462 5 лет назад

Congratulations!

@Weavile12 4 года назад

Nevada Kid r/woooosh

@gm4993 5 лет назад

Good talk!

@user-rx6qz6uf2h 4 месяца назад

Great presentation!!!

@mhmm8725 7 месяцев назад

This dude is not just well practiced, but extremely humorous, which makes me wonder if mastery of anger increases your humor levels.

@joshwilliams3653 5 лет назад

Your anger is a gift

@onomequenuncative Год назад

incredible.

@shawnhupp6560 2 года назад

Awesome 👏 thanks

@dukedex5043 Год назад

This video made me realize fake laughs in crowds make me angry.

@sw123n7 2 года назад

I need this

@kevinsbott 5 лет назад

I am a fanatical collector of quotes. Mohandas Gandhi has perhaps my favorite quotable phrase. He said that properly channel anger is the most powerful forces of good in the world. And that anger is like electricity, It can light a whole village, or Electric You.

@user-uf1bd9dv7n 5 лет назад

kevinsbott I think this helps me Thanks internet random gentleman

@sgt.warski2958 4 года назад

Choices made in anger, cannot be undone

@David-eu1ms 2 года назад

Sometimes there's no good reason for our anger, just like there's not always a reason when we are happy and contented.

@Bangandthedirtisgone 4 года назад

I agree with everything he says it’s just these talks are so *vague*. Like, they tell you to manage your anger but not *how*. Simple platitudes make for a pleasant talk but in reality I think many people watching this (and most other ted talks on similar areas) are looking for real, tangible tools they can use when they find themselves in the situations that provoke their undesirable feelings. Seems like a nice guy though.

@GTRliffe Год назад

anger is growing universally. Anger against woman is growing. Family ties are being severed more than ever...ALL these relate too mans inability too get secure in these most expensive times we live today, once upon a time parents that weren’t able too spell their name could afford buying and paying of house, AND many with multiple property!! TODAY were all more connected with each other, have technology that is close too magic AND YET the ability too acquire AND pay-off a home is close too impossible!!!! this is today’s reality!!!!

@borisbrian6082 5 лет назад

This made me subscribe TEDx

@matthewutter2060 Год назад

Yes I agree with Ryan is right and that’s true I don’t get mad anymore then

@mindfulnessasia1082 Год назад

Lord Buddha said, "Anger is like drinking poison but expecting the other person to die." A lot of our behavior is counterproductive to what we really desire, what we seek. Because we are eternal spiritual beings, we desire spiritual love and happiness. According to ancient wisdom, another person in this world cannot make me truly happy in the long run. Yet, we always try to blame others for our anger. Anger is a condition of my own heart, of my consciousness. When anger resides there, all someone else has to do is touch that, and it erupts. When we notice that anger is rising up, then we need to hit the pause button and not act on it. In anger we will do and say things that we will regret.

@mrthomaschannelearth 5 лет назад

All I have to say about roundabouts is.. I'd rather be mad than dead

@pacmanshooter247 5 лет назад

Hm. I do have a rage problem. But I don't experience anger the way he describes it. I just get insanely angry, not thinking anymore, not catastrosizing or anything. Mad. blind. irrational rage. No thinking. I cannot listen to rhat anger. If I give in to it, I start smashing things. I have to go be alone and meditate or listen to music or go for a walk to make it go away.

@Boobies92545 5 лет назад

Pacmanshooter I was the same way.. Let's just say if it wasn't for meditating I would be in prison or dead right now.. We have to learn to not let the thoughts and emotions we are experiencing control us.. Repeat this everyday "I am the master of my mind, I am the master of my reality ." "Thoughts are just thoughts they have no control over me " it takes practice but the more you're aware of reacting the better it will get

@Boobies92545 5 лет назад

I also started to scream like 2 years ago . It helps to get rid of any anger or stress.. When I scream I feel so powerful and afterwards I feel calm. I learned on RU-vid if you ever want to try it. Listen to Disengage - Suicide Silence .

@pacmanshooter247 5 лет назад

@@Boobies92545 Thanks for your advice. I cannot do the screaming as it is too destabilizing for my psyche - I do suffer from C-PTSD and the screaming happend in a rather.. uncontrolled fashion on its own, for some time, and I had to get it under control. My rage used to be worse than it is right now, but sometimes it suddenly happens and catches me unprepared,- problem with thoughts is that that wouldn't work for me. My mind is a very rational place - but the rage completly shuts off my mind. Thankfully I usually have enough control to just shut away from everyone and leave. Though it ruffles a few feathers sometimes, but I think that's better than hurting anyone. I don't think I'm in danger to become too violent right now. Was worse a few months ago. Anywho. Hope you're doing okay too. I'm happy you found a way to deal with it.

@k39564 Год назад

when my significant other gets angry, I somehow mirror that too. but I soon realized that I'm just in a "monkey see monkey do" situation. lately I try not to mirror anger. but then I feel guilty when im not angry , especially when anger arose from some stupid silly little thing. I feel guilty because that person feels anger for hours and hours and I can "just let to go" . is anger something people (people with rage problems) enjoy, or maybe not enjoy, but neccasary to be sane in our current environment.

@ps123fan Год назад

i used to rage if i did bad in gym class, i hated losing, i would flip out. but besides that i dont think i had any rage problems as a kid.

@virgin_mary_in_islam2469 4 года назад

A man came to the Prophet Muhammad and he said, “Advise me.” The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Do not be angry.” The man repeated his request and the Prophet said, “Do not be angry.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 5765

@allaliensaredemonicandmust7566 5 лет назад

anger is priceless if justified

@jaredlarsen9419 7 месяцев назад

what about if we do not feel anger in the moment of injustice/mistreatment, but feel it later on? how do we feel anger in the moment and respond accordingly?

@haloinipatrick8432 Год назад

sometimes i can't understand when someone get mad, but sometimes i feel mad but i don't know why i think is unnecessary

@danielthomas7791 2 года назад

Awesome

@Mindset19877 3 года назад

The reason there are bad people who make us angry is because of a bad value system we live. Every emotion (guilt, happiness, anxiety , depression ) turn into anger if these emotion crosses an internal threshold. As a result of these threshold we develop a system in our mind . This system is called our value system . Collectivity it defines the value system and culture of a society.

@Calel_S 3 года назад

This is why when angry, one must use that primal energy force for self advancement. We can’t think ourselves out of anger because it will fester and grow internally the more we pretend to fake happiness externally, or express what some call toxic positivity, which is just a colorful phrase for someone who’s delusional and incapable of confrontin there problem.

@Tsunad360 2 года назад

I was super angry at the people closing the gate to my stairs after a fire had happened on the balcony upstairs. I tried communicating through the landlord, writing a keep open sighn, and nothing came of it. Finally i got so upset when it was raining and no kids were running outside that i ended up banging on the door. I had a cup of tea and tried to collect my thoughts. They didnt open the door finally i left and went back to my house they opened the back door and we had a good spat. Hopefully they had listened when i asked them to close their own gate instead or to open the gate after the kids were done outside. Anger is strange i guess it was created from not being listened to on a danger possibility.

@johnrainsman6650 2 года назад

My anger toward something is complex. Has anyone ever gotten so _tired_ of someone they see constantly? I feel we see my mom's sister more than my two other aunts (her sister in laws), and I think I'm annoyed because...they're my favorites over the maternal aunt. I get to see the aunt I'm most annoyed with (secretly) than the aunts I enjoy, and I guess I feel that's not fair. It's her, her, her, her, her. Sisters can be SO annoying, even as moms (with the sisterly comparisons, you know). Besides, I think I resent their relationship a bit because I'm a brother with only sisters, and I feel brothers are less important to sisters? You know, brothers are for brothers and sisters are for sisters? Like I said, it's complex. Is it possible how I'm feeling is actually normal, so I'm not being a bigot toward my one and only blood aunt (without her knowledge)?