If your wife doesn't want to initiate and you always do, you can either accept your fate or run far and fast. Even if you were able to get a compromise, it's just pity and a chore for her. And even if she says it's not, you'll always have that in the back of your mind. if she isnt putting in the effort, don't bother. You are wasting your time.
That is one solution. Or, the two of you can talk about it. She probably has responsive vs. spontaneous desire. Actually, most of us do. Men just "respond" faster. Compromise isn't what you want. A real solution where you both feel seen, heard, valued, and loved is.
@@leslidoares That hasn't been my experience nor what i have seen by discussing it with other men. Cutting our losses is definitely the best outcome unless we can't financially.
Talking or trying to talk about issues in your marriage usually just results in a fight. Ask a marriage counselor. They see fights all the time. Doesn't solve anything. It just makes both of you angry.
What do you do when your wife doesn't want to be touched has absolutely no interest in any type of intimacy let alone be ravished, I know how this guy feels you can only take so much rejection I don't want a divorce I want my wife but when you have no physical contact its impossible to be intimate and everything else becomes irrelevant, its got to the point where you don't care anymore
I'm in a similar place. I'm in counseling. He wants me to be independent, not dependent. Then he wants us to come together in interdependence. Meaning you do things for each other out of love, not if I do this, my partner should do this. He feels my wife has depression. Counseling has helped me. I'm learning to be independent and do stuff I enjoy regardless of what she thinks about it. (I have gained some best friends, and we are fixing a boat we paid $500 for and two 4-wheelers) I'm independent of her feelings. She is crying, and I don't take it in. It's her problem. It's not my job to keep her happy.
You make a choice. They open up the marriage and lets you have it from someone else with conscent or you divorce and move on with your life and with someone who cares about you for who you are and not what you can provide. Alternatively, you can learn to cope and focus on yourself and get more hobbies and activities.
True that no one wants to be raped (I hope). But it’s not true that no woman fantasizes about being raped. I’m not saying it’s healthy, but rape fantasies are not uncommon for women. Good video, lots of good insight. Thanks.
"This can be a little bit confusing..." yea...because it's totally subjective and NEVER specific at all, just a THING that makes her FEEL a certain kind of way. LOL....don't do it guys, it's a trap.
Remember what drew the two of you together in the first place. A certain Band, concert, author, color... breakfast, dinner... dessert, snack... talk about the things you have in common, reflect, plan... daydream... and just start stimulating her senses. Then comes the slight touches... shoulders, fingers, hands... brush up against her, look into her eyes when you talk, look at her ears, lips, chin, cheeks... now Mix It All Up and get her talking to you... and Listen. She wants to be heard, noticed, appreciated and then touched... and not just physically.
All good in theory. In reality I think few women are willing to give up power and very rarely at that. And how many women are willing to do the work needed to make their man want to ravish them? There is an old word that is basically extinct today: ravishing, as in darling you look ravishing! Today, many women wouldn‘t dream of catering to chauvinist male stereotypes of female attractiveness.
I am thinking that I will go to this other apartment I have and I tell her that call me when she is ready to be a wife again, I will manage alone in that other apartment.
Your 2nd definition is off. It means she wants to be taken by a stronger and more dominate man. She wants his desire for her ti be so strong that he can’t help himself because she is so desire able to him. He his involves her , almost unwillingly, being weaker in this fantasy that she has no choice other than relinquishing her control (being taken) to that man enrapturing and ravishing her.
Good point, women do need to get out of their own heads and stop crushing their husbands confidence. Plenty of confidence in what I want to do with and to her, just lots of rejection
I couldn't agree more and I'm sorry you're being rejected. Having conversations about intimacy are tough but necessary. It's a skill that can be learned and can make all the difference in getting things back on track.
"Instructional session" not really. Its a correction session. Instruction would actually open the lines of communication. Correction is a game of trial and error until you hopefully get it right until you finally give up in frustration and wish you never had a sex drive. Its cruel to not say what you like but not a problem saying what you dont.
Every woman I've ever known wants to be desired as if she is a super model, or as if she's my celebrity crush. And none of them tried to resemble anything like that. Starfish pose, waiting for me to perform the magic. Ugh.
If you are locked in for financial reasons then seems you are fooling yourself- no money or finace should replace a human bings self worth! Move on life is too short
The speaker here drones on based on her ‘feeling’ women want this… she shows no hard evidence or facts to back this up. Don’t listen to her unless she proves her theory.
Did you just mention your client’s name Tom? And not saying it is a fictitious name? In my profession that is forbidden by law in my country. Nothing said about the ethics. I hope his real name isn’t Tom….
I'm pretty sure "Tom" is a placeholder. She also left zero other identifying details. Clinicians need to be able to pull from past experiences to get their point across.
