Worried My 93 Year-Old Dad Broke the Family Trust Rules for Ex-Mistress 

That is such a simple way of looking at it. Elderly people get taking advantage of everyday by strangers and relatives who are no where around when the money is gone and he needs care. If that happens, why should she be left holding the bag. She actually has a right to know what is going on. Been through it.

Christine my husband had the family business given to him after 25 years of work. His sister and brother had a fit, claiming concern about their parents. They were planning on my in-laws dying and being my husband’s new boss. I’ve seen “concern” first hand. I also know what fake concern sounds like. It sounds like this lady.

Pickles432 Noname we don’t know this lady. This man is 93 years old and she is his daughter. If her father made his wishes known and now he is behaving differently then it makes sense that she question it. I don’t assume her motives are all bad. They could have a fantastic loving relationship. We don’t really know that history and we don’t know his mental capacity.

@@pickles432noname6 my Dad is manipulating my siblings and I over his will, trying to get us to give him money. I choose to stay out of it, don't ever expect to get, and don't expect to give anything.

Right? Lol

GREAT POINT

Honor my mother by dragging my father through the mud 😂

And if you hear her exact words, she wasn't even 100% certain he even has a mistress. These are just allegations. She is absolutely money-hungry.

Or maybe she doesn’t want some “new friends” take advantage of him. if his wishes were to leave the daughter and other family members money then what is wrong with that? Nothing wrong with families passing wealth to the next generation.

I can see where she wants her inheritance. You would too--anyone would.

Maybe he *did* give it to his daughter - the *mistress* daughter that's his too, that is...!

Exactly...

Ah, no? If it is a trust then the trust is bound by the rules of the trust as set up by the person setting up the trust.

I know a woman trying to sue her grandparents over this same type issue. The same grandparents that paid her way through college, grad school, bought her a Mercedes and a condo for her to live in in an affluent part of town. Can you spell UNGRATEFUL.

Chasity Everett ...Wow, sad. Yes and I can also spell ENTITLED BRAT. Sounds like they created that “monster” and are now reaping what they sowed.

Chasity Everett how awful. I mean, sounds like all that WAS her inheritance. Some choose to dole it out as needed, instead of making kids or grandkids wait until they die. If she wants cash, she could sell the car/condo/both 🤷🏾‍♀️

Well I do sorta disagree. I believe that yes, it is their money. However, if you have children you should have a goal of creating, or adding to family wealth. The key important factor is to not take from it, ever. Eventually, you would have enough interest throughout the generations to live on interest. Create a trust that goes to your kids, and their kids etc. Half the interest it makes goes to them, the other half gets re-invested, this way it can only grow.

Hello!! Annoys me so much when people pocket watch their parents.

Forth generation realizes that every first generation was a third generation at one point.

This. Jackie Chan said his son isn't getting any money in an inheritance. To paraphrase "When I die my son gets none of it. If he can't earn his own fortune, then he doesn't deserve mine."

savage 😂😂😂😂

Right????

I think she's mistaking an estate for a trust

@@bmmk12 the family has TRUST ISSUES

Exactly. My grandfather had a trust and his personal residence had nothing to do with it. She's confusedm

She wants her dads money she don’t want to earn lazy kids theses days stop sitting on your parents money go work and go up in life

Exactly

Yup. Fighting over inheritance is ridiculous, kids aren't entitled to a single red cent. My parents already told me that their may be some assets left for myself and my siblings but don't count on it.

@Mike Park My mom called a family meeting and laid out the will, explaining it all and what she expected to happen among almost all those in the will to get something. I took one look and said.... "The lawyers will get it all. And since I wanted to be a lawyer I won't complain out of professional courtesy." (LAll was lost the minute she got a *WILL* instead of a living trust - and I *KNEW that* but Momma never wanted to listen to the youngest kid, no matter how many law classes I had taken or how much I tried to explain it to her. Just so the rest of you folks know.... *A will INITIATES probate* ! Once you have a will, it takes a probate to transfer property from the deceased person to heirs! Just a heads up, because we lost almost a million dollars due to a judge who wanted to hold onto all the rental income in a special bank account yet refused to allow *any* money to go out - like for paying the mortgage!!! - until the probate was over. After over 4 months, the lender took it back and got almost a million dollars in equity because of one stupid judge - on a property that cash-flowed like a dream. After getting my first chest pain ever fighting with the family member who was supposed to be administrator trying to fix it, I got the message and walked away from it all. The saddest thing of all was, Mom and her closest friend both went to see the same lawyer at the same appointment. The friend got a living trust for her real eatate at that meeting but Mom did not, so thanks to probate and a dumb judge we lost it all.

@@samjordan8800 ouch

donald johnson @Donald Johnson Finally, someone with common sense. It sounds like you have been there. The kids will definitely be expected to take care of mom and dad. Even nursing and hospice care require a huge time commitment. Seriously, anyone who has been through this knows the sacrifices that have to be made to make sure mom and dad are in a decent place and taken care of. Those sacrifices can include missed career opportunities because your time is spent with mom and dad which result in missed opportunities to build your own wealth. Geez, makes me think most of these people haven’t been down this road yet.

HAHAA

A 93 year old parent usually winds up being the kids business at some point.

@@Chris-tg3qy She said he is still working and never retired LOL. This guy sounds like a character, hope he leaves her an old truck he used in the 90's.

Bingo, nailed it!

She's already acknowledged that possibility to her self or she wouldn't have brought it up.

Oh she called you later and told you the rest of the story ?

You know she’s been racking up debt saying “I’ll be fine I’m getting an inheritance!” And is now scared 💩-less!!!! 😂

GenX X 😂 happy?

I feel like he kept saying that to emphasize what she said in the beginning and was saying that to remind her she said it.

@Kyle Webber 110% this

If mom and dad told her they wanted to leave her some of their wealth then logically she would expect that. Why does that seem to bother some of you? Children should always question “new friends” and out if character financial decisions made by a parent who is over 90. It is their obligation to make sure dad and mom are not being taken advantage of and that is why Dave is not angry with her. He sees that too.

It probably is!

And don't want to wait for the one that earned it to die...

@Online Complainer Refuses to die?

😂😂😂

@Online Complainer refuses to die with dignity? 😂

I think that the children should be the beneficiaries of any assets in an estate.

Real good 😂

I started doing the birdman handrub

ex mistress granddaughter - meaning HIS grand daughter

minischnauze13 no, his daughter if anything. his granddaughter would be his mistresses daughters daughter

@@jackfleming7137 right, I was implying that he and the mistress had a child together and that the granddaughter in question was the subsequent grandchild.

Sherry Ellesson Have a little compassion for the poor girl! Being rejected by your father for a mistress and her kids is horrific!! If we’ve learned anything from Dave, we know that money means way more than buying stuff. She obviously feels like her dad loves the mistress more than her mom. And that hurts deep in a person’s soul.

@@priscillalongworth1720 She's far from being a girl, and she never said that her father's dalliance caused her or the family any kind of hardship. Have a little common sense.

@@SherryEllesson i think you're the one that needs common sense. The lady doesnt have to say "my dad choosing another person over his legit family hurts me deeply" for you to know thats the case

@@priscillalongworth1720 she said she has a great relationship with her dad. All her complaints had to do with assets and what the dad was doing with it so it appears her issues are more financial than anything else.

That’s not true. Trusts go into effect immediately. Wills are only good after some one dies

If he set up the Trust chance are he has complete control of it. You will be the original trustee of your living trust. As trustee, you will have complete control over the property that will be held in the trust.

This is another reason God hates divorce.

Jesus Christ is Lord still a shame to see you get cheated from those assets

Aint it funny how we have to forgive the bad people for the bad things they've done for us to "have a better relationship" with them, while they dont really have to reconsider where they have gone wrong?

@@tandyrichae6194 That is not in the bible...

@@usernameluis305 who said they don't?

Jennifer Tackett this a very true and mature statement.

This is a very wise comment

It's almost a universal truth that step-moms are bad for a father's children, no matter how you try to justify it.

@@riumudamc4686 Wow! Reference?

Very wise way of looking at the situation

He build it with her mom and he’s giving all to the mistress. So wonder the kids are upset. It’s not just his money. Their mom worked for it and I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t have wanted the money to go to his mistress.

@NurturingTalents she didnt get cheated on tho, it was the mom

@@MarksTournaments you wouldn't care if your dad stabbed your mom in the back?

@@missy3505 Maybe the mom was ok with it because she didnt want to do the deed anymore.... Different strokes for different folks.

@@grantarmbruster6591 OR......Maybe the dad is a homosexual Russian spy and he only married the mom and had an affair to cover his tracks🤔

@@missy3505 Yes this is exactly why as Christians we should hear both sides. Why on earth Dave allows people to talk bad about people who are unable to defend themselves from evil charges is beyond me. So yes we don't even know if he really has a mistress or not. Thank you for proving my point.

You ever notice that when people start statements like that, whatever the opposite of what they say is probably the truth?

She was really looking forward to owning that Lake House . And he randomly sold it without telling the family.

If he's in a right state of mind, then none. But this has the markers of elder financial abuse. It's worth getting involved just to be sure he isn't being manipulated or tricked out of all his wealth. Like if I had gotten a call from her back when I was working at a bank, I'd have already filled out a form to have this investigated.

@Johnny Five that's often part of getting involved, right.

@Johnny Five by "I don't see" do you mean "I can't imagine she would", or "she's not currently doing it"?

@Johnny Five not asking you to write one, just clarifying. But assuming it's the latter, I'll point out that she's still trying to figure out whether/how to approach him about it. She doesn't know if she needs to get a 3rd party involved yet.

When my father left my mother I said to her let's watch Jerry!

@@dteun plot twist, your dad left your mother for Jerry!

@@LT-iz5eq haha it was kind of dramatic but that would have made the show..

Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

@@LT-iz5eq Jerry was is the best antidepressant therapie out the no meds can beat Jerry Jerry Jerry

This is probably the best response on here. There is a lot going on and dad should make his wishes known legally and verbally to the family. The reason he needs to tell them is to make sure nobody is influencing his decision and to make sure anyone that he gives a responsibility to is willing to carry that out. He also needs to address how he wants any possible health issues handled so when the time comes his wishes are carried out. The daughter may not be going about this in the right way, but dad definitely has a responsibility to clear up any confusion about his wishes. If a parent doesn’t want to do that then they very well could be leaving their children a mess to sort through. If you love your kids, don’t do that.

Yes, I loved that movie.😎

W

When a parent cuts out the children, it’s hurtful and hateful.

@@hollyb6885 if the children only care about money then they deserve to be cut out

Mr Mackey Giving gifts shows that you love someone. We give birthday gifts, wedding gifts, etc. to cut your children out is hurtful and hateful like I said before

@@hollyb6885 Oh so you must be one of those people who expects everyone to give you a present on your birthday.

Dillon H I don’t expect presents from family and friends so if I get one, I know they love me.

@@Austenfan177 yeah i dont get why people in comments think you should just accept your parent essentially moving on from being your parent and being someone elses

"clout"

@@ieatpussy1000 😂😂😂 Dave's not cheap he's FREE!

😂😂😂😂😂

Good to know you think of people as play things instead of people

The possibility of elder financial abuse should have been addressed. It’s incredibly common.

Back to my evening exercises asap, hopefully some multi-millionaire leaves me his trust fund.

@@thecatnextdoor12 whats ur name

😂😂😂

Well there is now more to that story of why he looked so uncomfortable.

Indeed! Maybe Chris’ estate will have extra beneficiaries that we don’t know about. That reaction does have a panicky realisation about it.

Yeah because people who take care of the their parents don’t need those places