My Dad Is Asking For $55,000 To Pay Off His Debt! 

The mere fact that he’s asking is because he knows what you have. One reason why I tell nobody what I have

If her dad can pay the daughter's loan back with interest, then the dad can pay his own debts. He has no intention of ever paying it back.

She will NEVER be repaid.

i dont think Dave caught the fact that she said she'd have to pull from a retirement account. DO NOT DO THIS

It won't stop at $55k. If they say 'yes'there will be more asks.

80 years old and STILL in debt .... Ive come to the conclusion that for some people debt is like drugs

My parents are 94 and 91, living on their own, haven't had debt for years, and don't ask for a thing but for us to visit occasionally.

It’s not $55000 because once they know that they have access to free money they will keep coming back for more

Her dad should be ashamed of himself for even asking.

“No” is a complete sentence. Thanks Dave. 👊🏽❤️

My dad who left when I was four and took all of our money asked me to help him buy a house. I told him no. He took all of the money that my grandparents left to me and never paid a dime in child support. He foolishly spent all of his money on motorcycles and alcohol. I do not owe him anything.

The fact that he's not pushing his wife to go get the money from her family means they don't want to offend them, and they don't mind offending and pressuring this lady. They're BULLIES.

If this guy hasn't learned how to manage money at 80, he will never learn. If I were his daughter, I would feel zero guilt!!!

I don't understand, they say they will pay her back, then just pay your debt back instead. They have no intention of paying her back.

My mom asked me for $600 a few years ago. It felt weird, but I gave it to her. A few months later she asked for $2500. It just feels wrong. She made plenty of money, she was just horrible at managing it. She and I are estranged now for other reasons but parents asking their kids for money is definitely indicative of a broken relationship.

Dave is correct, she is an easy mark. She needs to stand up to her Dad.

This father is wrong for putting his daughter in this position. The answer is NO!!

Years ago I was given some good advice about "lending" money to friends and family : never lend them money, rather give it to them. Think about how much you can give with a peaceful heart, give them that amount only, and then tell them it's a gift they don't have to pay back. This technique has saved me a lot of stress over the years.

I paid a relative's 48,000. Debts. Paid each debt separatly to not give them the cash. In exchange for their paid off house title. 11 months later they are maxed out out on all credit cards. Some people never learn. I don't loan money without collateral, anybody.

My family tried this same stuff the second I became successful. Amazing how fast the vultures come and suddenly think they are entitled to YOUR money.

Dad; Hey sweetie can you pay off your mother in laws debt so she can run up more? Daughter; No!!!

Tell your dad your husband said NO and he will divorce you if you give them money. We do that all the time.

I have a feeling that "his wife" is behind all of this.

"No. You're 80 years old and should have your life together financially. You have had plenty of time."

I take for granted that my my parents are stable sometimes. My family is as “plain jane” and boring as it gets. But we love it! No drama

If the father was starving, then help. His problems are his own doings. The father is entitled.

I was asked for money years ago by family member. Too many red flags. I offered her help with making a budget, talk with her & her husband, review life & career decisions, etc. Never heard back after that discussion. I was using the principle give a man a fish & you fed him a meal, teach a man how to fish & you feed him forever. I believe many of those loans are asked because they know they won’t pay it back & no legal repercussion; no accountability like taking a loan from a bank. That same family member got money from my brother, he never got it back, never heard from her again. Shame!

My mom, sister, and brother are all millionaires. I am too. We all made it ourselves. My brother tends to brag about his net worth to me. When he does, I always immediately ask him for some. He always says no way. (I wouldn't take it anyway.) Recently he found out I was a millionaire too. He offered me and my company (I own my company) a large contract job. He had no idea about my finances. It's best to keep your good financial position to yourself when it comes to family.

“NO IS A COMPLETE SENTENCE.” -Dave Ramsey

“A travel agent for guilt trips!” I’m gonna use that line

Im so glad Dave made a point about the father. My parents asked me (and I listened) to give my sister thousands. I finally got my head on straight and I don't talk to any of them anymore. My husband and I now have over a million net worth and it wont be long for our house to be paid off fully. We are focusing on ourselves away from toxic family & its been the best decision of our lives. We are only in our early 30s too - this lady needs to suddenly go "quiet".

My parents tried to get me to pay off their debt when I was 18. They spent recklessly on credit cards and didn’t even try to save money. They racked up the debt when I was young and I had no idea. When I said no they said they would kill themselves if I didn’t. Some parents are just awful

The fact that this woman doesn’t even know how much money they have is evidence that she is also dealing with money trauma. She needs counseling. Her father is manipulative and irresponsible and her need to people please is a red flag. Dave is on point as usual!

The best response is no. It’s a complete response.

Never put yourself in a position where you can take from your children.

Why's Dave so surprised by her dad's age, she already told him she's 56!

Don’t make Dad’s problem your problem.

A good strategy that I have used when a family member hits for a loan is to flip it back on them and tell them you were just about to ask them for a loan as you are so broke and quite embarrassed about it. It works, try it.

I love how straightforward he is with people, no kid gloves. Which is what is needed sometimes

Don’t put your bad decisions on your child!

She will become the gift that keeps on giving.

It all stems from people TELLING others how much they have....that's WHY he asked you guys for money.❤

If that $55k is in pre-tax retirement accounts, it's gonna cost caller even more than $55k to give it to her daddy. She's gonna have to pay taxes on that IRA distribution, too. Just a bad idea all around.

She should turn the tables and force her dad and make him feel embarrassed to why they are not getting back the money her step mom's family owes them. Like dad why are you letting them take advantage of you and rip you off. I can't see you like this let's go get your money back!!

The caller and husband are both under 59.5 yo. Just tell the dad that they can’t take any money out of the accounts without a penalty.

This lady needs to get to the point. She is basically excusing it and laughing. She doesn't know if they have two million or three million. So wishy washy. Say yes or no and move on.

I am 76. NEVER would I ask my kids for money, loan or no.

When you tell soneone 'no', it earns you respect from the other person.

She could have just said she does not want to publicly announce her net worth in case family and friends are listening.

How do you not know if you have one million or two million? That’s a huge difference. It’s mind boggling..

We dont want to do that. Me: Then dont

They want to be debt free so that they can start buying/spending on the cards again! My answer would be "no". And I agree with Dave that "no" is a complete sentence!

Why cant he just pay off his own debt the way he thinks he will pay off his daughter. Unless he has no intention whatsoever to pay her back.

A lot of parents think it is their child's responsibility to take care of them during their older years when they did not do the same for their parents. My guess is that this guy did not lift a finger for his parents but is now demanding things from his kids.

My dad would never have asked me for money. He was a proud man. But if mine asked me, he would get it because he was a great man and if he asked me, I would have known he would have needed it.

I lent my parents money, several thousand dollars and they are refusing to pay me back. So now i will have to take them to court just to get it back.

Nope! No is a complete sentence. Parents don't always have your best interest at heart. Wish I had learned that lesson earlier in life.

Daddy Dearest is going to ask for more money when you cave. This is just the start.

Wow. What Dave said about Biblically to honor your parents, NOT their misdeeds?? Hit like a ton of bricks, as I had (past tense) a similar situation. That can apply to any family member. God will help each one find their answer, and with great teachers such as Mr. Ramsey, and then when your cup runneth over? You get to give to those in true need. I am grateful to be able to listen to him in addition to Him!!!

They give Dad and his wife the money. Wife’s kids get out of repaying. Dad, wife, or both, die. At best, their assets will be split, with half going to his kids, and half to hers. This means the caller gifts Dad’s wife’s kids half of $55K, and loses out on half of the $55K that should have been back in the estate. Actually, the caller is out $77,500 (Caller’s $55K plus half of what the kids borrowed and didn’t repay). More likely scenario is that Dad dies first, and wife leaves everything to her own kids.

Ramsey usual advice is "Dad I can't give you this money because we LOVE YOU.". Lol

You can tell in her voice that she is going to give the money. Her dad will sweet talk her and guilt her into it. Many older parents are excellent at guilting their kids into believing they owe it to them.

I 100% agree with you. DO NOT give your father the money. I've learned to say NO with no explanation.

This father's debt is the product of bad behavior. To solve this problem, it is most effective to resolve the behavior rather than wasting time effort and resources on the debt.

Thank you for your commentary on what it means to honour your parents ❤

I used to lend my younger sister money for her random “out of the blue I need a spot this month I’ll pay you back when I can” situations. Never again.

I practiced in front of a mirror saying over and over "no but thank you for thinking about me" and it has become a real good habit. So much so a friend asked me for something simple. The line just popped out of my mouth and my friend was furious yelling i know what that means. Years ago i told her that in my head it means f**k off, eat dirt and die, nope not happening. And NEVER explain why, just stick to the original no phrase

This is a hard no. It is not a life-or-death situation it is not parents fell ill and may lose their home and I have millions in cash laying around.

I would tell them we don't have $55,000...I would give them $20,000 and end the conversation...take it or leave it.

It's annoying when people call in and don't know their numbers. But good advice, Dave

My first rule is to never financially help anyone who is retired. If dad's working as a greeter at Walmart, we can talk about the kind of help he needs.

I genuinely mean it when I express my stress and concern regarding the market crash and high inflation, particularly in relation to my retirement. I have been experiencing losses for quite some time, and while some may argue that crises can present opportunities, I am feeling overwhelmed. However, I understand that investing is a long-term endeavor, and it is crucial to maintain focus on the bigger picture and the long run.

She probably told her dad that she was a millionaire. You don’t tell anyone you’re a millionaire. At 80 you can die with the debt. Just pay the minimums. At 80 you can rank up the credit cards.

Walmart is always hiring for a greeters for old people.

Just tell him to go to a bank for a loan. It sounds like he has bad finically behavior and you would never get the money back.

A big part of Financial Freedom is having your heart and mind free from worry about the what-ifs of life! Have an amazing week everyone!!!

I have a brother who asked me for money several times. He has filed for bankruptcy twice. He wanted our mother to give him some of her modest retirement money and that was the final straw. I couldn't believe he would put her at risk like that. We have to trust our experience with people and do what is right for us.

To speak to Dave Ramsey is on my bucket list.

I would just give them the money. No loan, end of story. One time, non-repeating gift. But I'm not a pushover. A year or two later, the answer to "Could we have some more?" would be an unhesitating "No." But it's not me on the phone, so I feel like this was the pep talk this woman needed to hear. Her gut was saying no; she just needed some help getting that no up to her mouth. Edit: I would probably ask for a copy of the first page of the credit card and loan bills and send in the payoffs directly. "There! Debt gone! Have a happy life!" (Narrator: But the debt wasn't gone. It would later rise from the dead.)

Never.... Ever.... Touch your retirement account

What's the difference between owing the credit cards and the car loan and owing the daughter? Nothing. It doesn't change their situation... If they are saying they will repay the daughter "with interest" then why not just pay the original debts. It's just moving the debt from one creditor to another. It only helps them if they aren't planning on repaying it ever. I know they SAY they will make payments... But after a couple they will stop. They have to be expecting the daughter to make it a gift. The parents already know how it feels to be owed money from a relative and not pressuring the debtor to pay it back... Now THEY want to do it too. The daughter needs to say that they don't want to be in the same situation with a relative owing them money and making the relationship weird.

Don't do it. My parents gave my aunt and uncle 1,000 for a lawnmower. Later when mom was a widow, they asked for 5k. She didn't have a house anymore and they did

I know some parents that asked for $250,000 from their daughter so they wouldnt lose their house. She helped them and they promised to "give her" the house for helping them with that debt. Once she paid parents said "Nope the house is worth more than 250k but thanks for the help we'll add your name to the house as a beneficiary"

Dave is a such a golden soul. Really glad that he is blessed by God with all spiritual, intellectual and material riches, he really deserve it. Dave thank you for everything!

Tell your dad and stepmother to declare bankruptcy.

I use to know a relative who always asked my husband and I for a loan whenever they were in a bind. I started saying no because I felt like a bank! Truth they will find someone else just say no!

" The bible says to honor your parents. it does not say to honor their misbehavior " 👍🏾

Totally different situation, but reminds me that I had a drug addict parent figure who would steal money from my birthday cards. After I moved in with another family member and got a job in high school she'd still ask me for "cigarette money" all the time. And never being taught how to stand up for myself and being gaslit into thinking she deserved it for raising me, I'd cave in every time.

I would die working on the Walmart floor, before asking my son for money, like this.

I’ve given my dad a truck before… only because he wouldn’t buy one. When he died… he left far more than I made through out my life or could ever give him.

Her dad's credit card debt is not her problem! If she pays it off, they will just run that credit card debt up again! "No" is a complete sentence.

Because one has done well in life, nice home, nice car, clothes, etc. because of hard work, the "have-nots" in the family think you are rich and expect the hard working ones to "help (read: give) them as well. There's one in every family. "No" is a complete sentence. Don't let emotion make a mature, hard working, responsible adult feel guilty.

You don't owe him anything. Don't do it. You know he will ask for more. It's not your responsibility to pay their debts.

I have multi millionaire family and friends and feel guilty when they pick up the tab at a restaurant 😐

I've had this sort of thing happen only 2-3 times in my 78 years. The first time was in the mid 60's. In-laws were desperate for a $355 loan that they promised to pay back. They never paid any of it back. The way I look at it is that if I were to ever again to consider loaning anyone money, I would be agreeing with them that they are not capable of making the money themselves. And that is a terrible message to give someone --here you go, I am capable and you are not. Nope, I'll not do that. Instead I'd go to great lengths to help in their education of handling money, finances.

80 years old and hasn’t figured life out

My family resents that my husband and I are financially stable.

"For What?" The first time Uncle Dave made me laugh.

"No, is a complete sentence." Yes! Dave scores a single-punch knockout!!!

It’s so hard when a parent asks for and expects money. The guilt trips: “we raised you” “I took care of my mother, and I thought my daughters would do the same” “the Bible says…” “You are so successful and have the money”