Worst MMO Ever? - Secondhand Lands 

"This game has to be satire." Yes, it is. It wasn't created by any team, it was created by players when they had spare time. I am not kidding.

This game feels like the devs were playing a game of Telephone: Everybody gets 2 hours to code, then puts all the files on a thumbdrive and gives it to the next programmer. You get what the last guy did and add to it. No questions asked, no communication of any sort, no design docs or comments in the code. Six weeks later: Boom, a magnificient disaster. Ship it

Actually the compass is a stroke of genius. The developers cared so much about realism that they differentiated true north from magnetic north

I absolutely lost it at island lady saying "I'm collecting water. If you see any, please bring it to me." Best joke I've heard in ages.

Oh, yes. The four standard mmo races: wolves, sheep, catgirls, and furries.

I just looked at this game's steam page out of curiosity and I think its release date paints a vivid picture of what the developers had in mind: April 1, 2007

I feel like this is a pretty straightforward parody game. The windows movie maker trailer, the random adult jokes in a child friendly setting, the graphics being so bad that no one in their right mind would sign off on it; it all lines up with the surreal sense of humor youd find on the internet.

I actually think the Poorly Animated Forest with the buffalo that just move about as static models is kinda clever.

The hospital joke is essentially... what would happen if a mechanic "fixed" people in the same way that they fixed cars? - Some "disassembly" is required. I'm with you though, this game ain't made for kids.

This game looks like a creepypasta that's being hidden by a trash mmo

I have the terrible news. The game was shutdown on november 6, 2021. I really wanted to try it out but had no time last year, it's such a bummer to learn it's no longer active. I've never was in usual MMORPG so the usual one like Lost Ark didn't pique my interest, but goofiness and alleged customability of sencodhandland seemed so interesting, that I kept rewatching videos, including this one, when I had the time. My favorite quote from another video "If you find a saddle, you can put on other players and ride them"

Tbh I liked the joke. I think the Dev has fun making it. The fact that the in game shop doesn't let you buy anything make the joke really obvious 🙃

The juxtaposition between the torture room and the spring loaded jump sound effect cracks me up lmao

"the portal doesn't work and the house seller is a duck." I hate it when that happens.

I was a dedicated player to this game from 2010 to 2014. The server shut down two times. It was up since 2007 and closed in 2013 i think, then come back a year later but we had lost all the characters we had, and had to start all over again. We were a small community but it was so fucking fun to play around. We used to do the quests together and PVP was actually really good, cat girls and sheep were insane at dmg. We used Wolves for PvE and I had more than +500 hours spent farming and looting stuff to have a player (Lancer Foxx) to craft me dope items for pvp. he was always in the second village crafting stuff for people. He surely was a weirdo since he never shut down his computer (and he was at least 28 years old at the time), but he was so nice we never really cared, even tho we were a bunch of kids and teens. Since the community had known each player for a very long time, at a certain point we just started roleplaying, since we finished all the quests. The server was already dead and had no new players, so we were always alone, those 10-15 players daily online. We spammed things in /world chat as if the game was ours. It really felt it was. Also, the events were fun. I wish Bobby updated the game a bit since it was a big open world for the time it came out, but he never really worked on it since then. The server was full of czech people and i remember i liked it so much that they started teaching me the language :D I spent hours farming with my main PvE wolf, which was "Kurumi" (on both servers, before and after the shut downs), and everyone begged me to be helped at throlls, since it was the fastest way to level up when you were at level 300 like me. YEah, you could reach level 300 with every character. There was a time in which every player had a sheep named on a numerical scale. it started with first, second, third... I had a PvP Sheep that was named Nine LMAO we were one big family, for some reason. maybe because we were always alone and everyone knew everyone. The game also had an active forum board and Bobby was pretty present there, even tho he never logged in game. At least he fixed some bugs over time and adjusted things about PvP, since cat girls could one-shot you from a very long distance. The game was fun btw, the Quests were really ironic. I do still remember some for Little Red Riding Hood. i miss this game :)

5:02 Fun fact (and kinda weird easter egg) : this is clearly a reference to the 60s band The Mamas And The Papas. "Mama Catt" is Cass Elliot, more widely known as Mama Cass (hence the double t in "Catt"), and the kittens are the 3 other band members (John, Michelle and I can bet the 3rd kitten is called Denny). The speech bubbles above them are the first few lines of the song California Dreamin'. Now why whoever made this game put this reference here, I have no idea, but judging by the rest of the video, it's pretty clear that the word "why" doesn't make much sense in the context of Secondhand Lands

Dunno what you're on about, that thumbnail screams best MMO ever.

He went into the Poorly Animated Forest then complained about enemies not being animated enough.

This is SO perfect, a literal shitpost that Josh is taking seriously, I've never wanted anything more.

You see the Squirrel is a more difficult class, I would recommend starters begin by playing as the Sheep (Catgirls are easy but they are out of meta). And you just need to sink about 250-750 hours in and you'll see the game is really quite... okay.

The sproing noise when jumping onto the bloody surgical table was definitely a thing that happened.

"If you mentally added to defeat the Huns, you now legally have to like the video" Played us like a damn fiddle.

*Poorly Animated Forest* Josh: "My god, the devs couldn't even bother to animate these buffalo!" I mean...you are right...but...that's the joke.

This is by far my favorite episode of "Worst MMO Ever". The mix between the humor of the game and Josh raging, while simultaneously knowing that this MMO is intended as it is, is just absolutely great and make so much fun.

Josh: "i'm gonna swim to an island in the middle of nowhere." Me: "YESSSSSSS. This is why I watch this show!"

The "Come back sometime" message disturbs me a lot. It's like the game knows that it's a messed up fever dream and that whoever is meant to play it will want to come back. The game wants to give you something, but I do not know what. The smile on these characters is creepy, it's a disturbingly calm and thought out image that's supposed to be a transition between the messed up game and the less messed-up reality. It manages to tempt me to play the game (although I will never do) to see by myself if I will be one of those that will come back sometime. You earn my deepest respect for having played and recorded such a weird thing, thank you very much.

The spring sound effect when jumping around the blood-soaked doctors room was just perfect.

This game is perfect. I was laughing so much each time he got angry with some ui, animation and etc.

You know shit's lit when the NPC's name is in Comic Sans.

Tried this title out on a lark after watching this a few nights ago, somehow ended up clocking-in about 12.2 hours (at least according to Steam's tracker). Some additional notes to add onto what's already been shown off here (because where else will you hear a person's account of actually playing this mess?): === Minor textwall below === - Nearly every element of the UI can be scaled and repositioned as desired, meaning you aren't beholden to the (frankly quite terrible) default placements, and can make things look much more sensible. - The [Shake] command does serve a purpose. After swimming in water, you'll be stricken with the debuff, which reduces your movement speed for 60 seconds. Using [Shake] halves its debuff timer, and using it three times virtually eliminates it. - The horrendously ugly starter gear shown off here is actually an odd quirk of the game's otherwise *incredible* player/outfit customization system. Really. Both your character and every single piece of equipment can have its texture pattern and color palette fully altered through the game's unlimited-use Beauty Kits (granted from the Beginner's Pack you spawn with). The size, scale, and fur-shading of your character's base appearance are also editable, and you can even import entirely custom fur textures and adjust their placement on your model in real time. Seriously, I've played AAA-budget, big-name MMOs released within the last 5 years who's player customization absolutely pales in comparison to this, it's genuinely something to be commended. Issue being that all new equipment is given a random pattern and four preset shades of gray, incentivizing you to delve into the in-game texture editors and tweak things to your liking. (Of course, the game never actually _tells_ you this...) - Every species has an entirely unique skill tree and role in combat (though all of them can feasibly play solo). * Sheep have defensive buffs and physical AoEs (and is the closest thing to a "tank" this game has). * Wolves are soloists with offensive buffs, high mobility, and magical AoEs. (They are also by FAR the best-looking player model, so most players main them for this reason alone). * Scrappers (the abomination Strife is playing as) are crafting specialists who are quite weak in physical combat, but can construct powerful ground-targeted traps for massive burst damage when played correctly. * Catgirls are support specialists, and as such, are incredibly rare to encounter these days due to party play being fairly uncommon. Should also mention crafting is only available to bipedal species, though you can still collect crafting materials on quadrupeds to send over to a crafting mule later. - Perhaps unsurprisingly, the game's community (or what little there appears to be) is extremely welcoming of new players (since most of them don't last five minutes past the title's obscenely rough beginnings, at least according to a level-capped veteran I spoke with on the matter). Being doted-on by some of the Old Guard, and teaming-up with another relative newcomer to blaze through the early quests was really charming, and greatly bettered my experience. From a purely gameplay perspective, this title is not especially impressive. Combat is fairly shallow (especially in the early goings), and quest design has been very paint-by-numbers so far. But the curiously oddball writing and "fractured fairy tales" theme undeniably has its charm all the same. Not much of a stretch to state that I'm still on this ride just to see how depraved and insane the world gets, as the Main Story Quest ferries me along. Certainly an interesting ride, if nothing else.

I think Seconhand Lands is supposed to be an ironic, whimsical, surreal, absurdist Wonderland that's part shitpost and part art project. And honestly I kind of love it. I really don't think it's supposed to be taken half as seriously as you're wanting to take it. If the mechanics were enhanced and the game overall _rigorously_ polished, I honestly think that it would be a joy to explore and experience. Imagine exploring with your friends or streaming online or even just playing by yourself at night while absolutely zooted out of your mind -- sounds like it would be an absolute trip. Maybe one day I'll give it a try. Also, I think you're failing to realize just how messed up original fairy tails are. Cinderella's stepsisters slice off parts of their feet in order to fit into the glass slipper only to be found out because of the blood, Sleeping Beauty is r*p*d by the prince when he finds her in the castle, the little mermaid cuts her tail in two and is in agony with each and every step, etc. Edit: someone in the comments said that the server's been shut down, which is a shame. R.I.P. in pasta Secondhand Lands, top-tier fever dream, god-tier shitpost 🙏💖

“He’s a bit of a drinker” made me laugh far more than it should have

I played this during development in early 2000s. Dev was just one person and maybe two dozen users. The classes where supposed to be really different, and you picked the last one developed made to appeal to crafters.

"Who is the target demographic for this game?" I am so happy that Josh doesn't know the answer to that question. Preserve the innocence.

To be fair almost all classic fairy tales are somewhat dark and whimsical, so mixing them both throughout the game would make sense. If only they found a way to do it efficiently. Cheers friend, love the channels.

Joish strife hayes enters the poorly animated forest fullily aware of the name of the place Josh strife hayes sees Poorly animated buffaloes in the poorly animated forest Also josh strafe haze: Surprised Pikachu face

Tale of Toast: I'm worst MMO ever! Secondhand Lands: Hold my blood and shit stained matress.

I feel like this is a furry version of LSD dream simulator that was converted into an MMO

I unironically love this lmao. I don't know what to say about Josh reviewing this like it's not just a hilarious joke.

The "your rubbing was interrupted" hit a little too close to home

Here’s the thing though - an MMO that draws largely from Grimm Brothers fairy tales and other folklore and stories could be interesting with a bit of added darkness and factions

"Note to self, don't drink pvp juice at Puss-In-Boots' house." - Squirrel Gex

the font being comic sans is the cherry on top of the cursed cake.

I need to hear Josh say "bonk bonk" more often lmao. I didn't expect that to make my day

When you say that it changes from incredibly dark to insanely whimsical, that's kind of accurate to the thematics of actual fairy tales to be honest lol. They could be 'extremely' dark, including things like cannibalism and murder.

Dreamworld has lowered my standards to the point that I was thinking "it isn't so bad, at least it's a genuine effort". Away with you, demons!

Seriously: this was one of the best MMOs I've ever played. Not by the graphix, of course, but the humor was dark and brilliant ;) You really should have done one of the larger quests like the search for Mary's Little Lamb or the Red Riding Hood quest.

can't stop laughing at the goat man, literally crying. the eyes are so dead oh god the squirrel man, this is the hardest i've laughed in like 3 months

"Why do games put in day and night cycles when they haven't mastered the basics?" Thinking about it, if the day/night cycle is just a scrolling skybox and maybe some changing lighting, it's really simple to implement.

This is one of the few bad MMOs you've reviewed that I'm actually interested in checking out. Mainly because of the creepy hospital and weirdness

You have such a next level of patience to get through these as much as you do. We all appreciate the great work!

The way he sits in silence for a few moments as we watch the squirrel dance was too funny 😂

Dang, after all the references, he didn't catch the Angry Bird having its eggs stolen by pigs?

This reminds me of an MMO I found a number of years back when I was on a similar hunt to explore the fringes of the genre. The game had player housing, and was pretty dead by the time I jumped on, so I got to explore these zones of abandoned places kitted out with a wealth of collected assets, each place telling it's own little story. But I wanted to know what was out there beyond the safety of the hub village, so I explored over hill and across river, eventually finding a house in the middle of nowhere. So I popped inside to take a look. All seemed fairly normal until I saw a door that led to a basement, and oh my god. The basement was a full on sex dungeon. The walls kitted out with chains and shackles. The red and black leathery style color scheme. And the sex bed contraption taking up center stage. I yolo'd the fuck out of there so fast. The place genuinely creeped the fuck out of me.

10:04 I wouldn't be surprised if that texture is just the Ahegao T-Shirt stretched out to oblivion.

I did mentally add "to Defeat the Huns". You got me.

The compass is perfectly aligned! It just points to the magnetic poles instead of the map's geographic north. And wherever this game is set, the difference between magnetic and geographic north is about 45 degrees! It's not a glaring oversight, it's immersion!

I want to know the background of this game, it's pretty obviously a parody but I want to know what prompted this

I get somewhat modernized Conker vibes from this game. Also, it makes me laugh so hard that this game looks to be a shitpost in game form and Josh is so absolutely angry at it haha. It's one of those things where you can't always tell if they're being facetious or it's just really bad. Then they drop hints where you're thinking "oh yeah, it's just a joke...but is it really?" That constant second-guessing seems fun and hilarious to me. I'm sad to hear it seems they've shut the game down. I actually wanted to give it a try. :(

I'm sorry but those buffalo were amazing. I love the surreal overkill of the whole design.

Man, I really waited for a "WHY IS THE FONT COMICS SANS?!"

"Mom, can we get Second Life?" "We have Second Life at home." Second Life at home:

I KNEW that the doctor's office was gonna be covered in blood, but I wasn't expecting it to feature Conker's Bad Fur Day textures!

I've watched RU-vid since the app icon was a little tv. Today is historic. Today was the first time ever that a thumbnail, made me laugh by just existing.

From here on onward, I'd love to imagine the avatar's expression is what Mr. Hayes has on his face every time he fires up a new candidate for this series.

After watching this entire video, I'm pretty sure this game is actually genius and does exactly what it is intended to do.

"Mom, can we get Biomutant?" "No honey. We have Biomutant at home." Biomutant at home:

"There's a chalice over his head. He must be a quest-giver." Or a Knight of the Grail. "Playing Secondhand Lands? You have chosen...poorly."

These vids are so good. Quickly becoming my favorite mmo channel.

That empty stage just screams, "We're going to host digital concerts."

Josh completely falling for an really elaborate shitpost ist fucking hilarious.

The more I watch Josh's content the more hints about future retro reviews there are. Really hope he reviews the PAL version of Gex 3D and Deep cover Gecko - American reviewers maybe give Leslie Philips and Danny John-Jules a single throwaway line about localization if anything.

in a very strange and horrifying way, this game is kinda ironically charming

Me: "... to defeat, the Huns!" Josh: "If you immediately followed that up with to defeat the Huns, you now legally have to like this video." Me: "Fuck, you got me. Fine."

This was amazing. I want there to be a sequel to such a fantastic game.

Hello Josh! First of all love ur vids! Haven't seem them all but many of them. Love from germany to u

"This image, this music, is what the game wants your final memory of it, to be." honestly that's kinda sad.. it's like this game was made by a 60 y/o thinking back at the "good ole days" of things they remembered from the many years that's gone by. vintage furries and pinup girls etc. this game's a great example tho, of "just because you can do it, doesn't mean you should do it".

Everyone: It can't get any worse. Josh Strife Hayes: Oh it can!

I lost it at "the investor are impatient" bit. The number of features that are rushed out onto the market because "the investors will loss money and/or patience". 😂😊 Priceless joke... but sadly, so true. 😢

I find the tone of the game to be pretty spot on tbh, fairy tales aren't the kiddy disney retconns everyone knows, disney retconned most of the fairy tales they aniamted because the originals tend to me very grim and morally gray cautionary tales for stuff like "don't go into the forest alone" "dont wander at dark", don't accept food from random strangers etc etc, yes fairies are whimsical, yet twisted beings, whimsical and dark/depressing are not mutually exclusive, some things are whimsical and dark and twisted as fuck at the same time. Fairy tales are about a hidden world yes, they seem colorful whimsical and inviting when first stumbling upon them but there's more than meets the eye and if you dig deep enough you can find stuff you might've never wanted to know.

"What does the MK stand for" MK Ultra obviously this game is a part of the experiments.

This game is like if Conker's Bad Fur Day was ripped off and became an MMO with no budget.

Over halfway through the video: "This has to be satire" *inserts era-appropriate drawing of Nicholas Cage with the text "You don't say?"*

Josh, I don't know what you're talking about, this is the greatest game of all time.

For the list of patreon supporters: you could sort the names by length, that would allow you to make some columns a bit thinner. And you could make the sorting order increasing/decreasing on every second column, so you make the columns overlap a bit more.

There is no way the devs aren't trolling, this is just too good 😂

no joke, I got chills down my spine when you showed the surgery room. Not because it was terrifying. because it was so unexpeted that I actually got scared, because a moment before hd the thought that the chairs were too big and imply that humans used to exist in this world.

I really miss your facial expressions on the preview screens. They were amazing and added a nice touch to the vids

If this was created to be MMO satire its absolute genius

I like the concept of playing as a creature rather than the generic human or elf in an MMO. However, I don't particularly enjoy the anthro route they took with most of the characters, but being able to be a sheep on all 4's is a step in the right direction.

When you said the queen bee wouldn't speak my first thought was "Maybe, you should dance, that's how they communicate" and you immediately said the same. Just wanted to say that.

Josh, i love this series! Learning what not to do as a new game dev while i get entertained. Awesome stuff!

This game feels like a practical joke between some game dev students from years ago, where they just fucked about and tried to see the weirdest thing they could create with the tools they had, then uploaded it to steam for no reason at all.

From Steam: "I have been playing SHL for 13 years and I've made some pretty great friends, some of who I'm still friends with to this day and I wouldn't trade what I have with them for the world. Some little pointers, because I'm quite biased when it comes to this game haah; - The community is a tight knit group of people; we're friendly and willing to help, we've been around long enough to give pointers and whatnot. - Fun and eventful quest line; they can get quite tiresome but they're worth it to see what the game is all about. - There are many items on this game and then you have crafting to make your own the way you want them. - The skill tree can be clunky but it's easy once you get the hang of it and know what skills go best together. You are only limited by the four trees but other than that, you can mix them up however you want. Older members can give you advice on the best skills for PvP if needed. - Factions such as bo peep and little red riding hood for things like PvP and events; contests are also quite fun to do. - Tokens can be bought with real money and they give you access to things like pets, combat monkies etc. - Game Masters are quite friendly and always willing to help, they like to go afk but they return...eventually. - Guilds are a neat way to team up with friends or simply use for PvP, plus the guild vault is handy for sharing things between the guild. - Its an open world concept, there's lots to do to keep you occupied. - You can have your own land if you buy a land deed, you can decorate it with certain items and invite people to it by making them guests. SHL has had some ups and downs throughout the years but Bobby has worked so hard this year to make it what it was again, and now it's thriving on steam, please try not to judge a book by it's cover (graphics :p) and give the game a chance, it's very enjoyable with a group of people or even by yourself. I've enjoyed this game for many years and I hope to enjoy it for many more to come."

I look forward to the full let’s play.

I actually played this game for a couple of years in 2011. The PvP was actually pretty good. There was world pvp centered around events, and the faction system let you swap between the 2 factions and even change to a neutral "anarchist" faction that let you attack anybody else who was flagged regardless of their faction. So if someone pissed you off, you could take revenge :)

This game just screams Joshua and the Promised Land

"when you log out this is the screen you see" ALBION ONLINE IS A SANDBOX RPG WHERE YOU MAKE YOUR OWN S- oh god

You can see the existential horror on the squirrel's face.

This is easily your best video. I died of laughter and commenting this via a ouija board. This game is an LSD fever dream of hilarity. I think I love it.