These are the worst self defense videos of all time My COFFEE ☕: topofthemornincoffee.com/ Twitter : / jacksepticeye Instagram 📷: / jacksepticeye LAUGH remix by Chetreo: / chetreo Edited By: / @aliceandchill
I had a self defense teacher who would always say “no matter what, always remember that your most useful and important move is this -“ and then he would run away
When jack was talking about how the ‘hands were never meant to hold anything’ I was expecting him to full on drop the mic like, “oh no! Guess my hands don’t work” 😂
I'm convinced Dale is some sort of immortal neanderthal which is why he keeps saying "the hand is not meant to hold anything" and he's trying to blend in with human society
@@jacksepticeye Hi Jack, I reported all the bots so they should be gone, I'm sorry you had to see those bots say that. And I absolutely love your content especially MEME TIME. You are just so hilarious
@@TheJack-o-King which is why you're "supposed" to keep weapons and dangerous chemicals AWAY from children but unfortuately what supposed to be done and whats actually done is completely different.
You know, a cop instructed us on how to easily survive dangerous encounters with people armed with a knife. In the video he introduced his friend who will be trying to hurt him. They then both stood not too far apart and the guy with the knife started running at him. The dude books it in the opposite direction making as much noise as possible
Yeah if I’m about to be stabbed I’m running. Idc if I have a knife too. First way to defend yourselves in almost any situation is leave. Now if I had a gun I’m robbing him lol. Pull a knife on me you fuck lol.
That actually kinda bothered me. Sean is shitting on these methods like they're bad advice. Someone hasn't grown up in a bad area with a lot of muggings. Some of these are self defense 101. And yeah...hands AREN'T good at holding things. The only good thing about hands are the thumbs, without that any grip strength is gone, palm is just open space.
Thank you for saying this. I'm glad I found someone who sees this like that. A lot of it is practicing it. I do hapkido and we have done some similar things to strip the gun. It might look dumb but in a situation like that, what else are you gonna do.
So true!!! I've learned a few of these in my martial arts class and while they're legit, they're not easy to pull off without a lot of practice and timing. Honestly, even with practice in some situations I wouldn't feel confident enough to risk my life to try to pull one of them off. Not easy or simple self defense that anyone can just try.
The thing that made me the most confused was Dale casually grabbing a gun after getting shot. *_You can't recover that easily from a bullet to the chest._* It's like getting kicked in the balls: You're going to be down and out of it immediately and for a while.
Kids shouldn't know what guns are Meanwhile, 8 year old Jeffy playing Fortnite, Call of Duty, and occasionally surfing the internet on his smart phone- specifically located somewhere in a privileged american area; "Go away mom am not do chore, am get Killstreak on Halo Infinite" Gets grounded, then proceeds to still use phone to look up Rust player trap tutorials so they can torture some rando later in their virtual sex dungeon.
@@grodygibsonlcd8038 there was a lot of effort put into that scenario, either that's first hand experience or you're just very creative. Either way I applaud you
Better than getting hurt or killed because they didn't know what a gun is. Like, "Oh, I wonder what this thing does." *Pulls trigger while pointed in an unsafe direction
I’ve never seen these self defense videos before, but this just looks like re-enactments of the fantasies you have in the shower of how you would handle these situations
@@malachiwilt3891 So you haven't had to sit through the elementary school training as a four year old being told "if there is an active school shooter cover yourself in the blood of your shot schoolmate next to you and play dead" huh?
Honestly the blues tabby one (I forgot what it’s called) is actually used in some martial arts for attacking pressure points and the one where he just pulls his arm from buff man actually works because he is pulling upwards against the thumbs which are the weakest parts of the attackers grip. He did word these both VERY incorrectly but these two actually had some truth. Edit: Also some of the leverage ones work but there are still much much better ways to go about it.
10:47 That actually works and we are taught that at the academy. When we do live action scenarios where we are geared up in protection gear and go all out, those grab techniques work ahha
If I was going to rob someone, it would probilly go something like this taps guy/girl on shoulder: "Hey! I'm going to steal your wallet and use it to buy video games. Is that ok?" Guy/girl response: "Ummm.....nooo" my response: "Ok.....I'll just go home and try to find another source of income" Then just walk off XD
I can’t express how happy the consistent reaction uploads make me. Maybe I’m easy to please with low effort videos, but just watching Jack react to funny things is always so entertaining
6:44 The tapping his leg is to let the person showing the action know that 'that's enough', in karate it's used when you are training so you stop when the person does it. If they aren't able to react and say it. Kinda like a safe word.
Hands down the best things for self defense: 1.)Cardio 2.)Situational awareness 3.)Mace or pepper spray 4.)Not trying any of Dale's BS, ESPECIALLY if they have a firearm
Why is nobody getting "awe" by the fact that Jack literally created a TV show, like a proper host with mic, clips, intro and the best commentary. As far as I remember in his first "LAUGH" video he actually said that he remembered such shows and wanted to create something like it. He DID IT! OUR BOY MADE IT!
@@baconlovingvampire4523 Kids dont understand how dangerous something is unless they fuck up and find out themselves, no matter how many times you tell'em. So no, don't teach your kid to use your gun.
to be fair, the "trick" of self defense, from 10:23 - 10:51, is literally what we were taught in karate to do (and taught little kids to do). it's not that the hand isn't meant for holding things, it's that the thumb is the weakest part of the hand/grip, so you utilize that weak point to break the grasp. if you pull against the fingers, you will NOT get loose. but if you pull back suddenly, especially with two hands clasped together, against the thumb, you can break the grip on you and you can flee. i've had male 5th degree black belts grab my wrist(s) with their whole strength, and I (a girl and a blue belt) was able to break free from their grasp by pulling against the thumb. we would surprise the kids we were teaching (literally 5 year olds) by grabbing their wrist and trying to drag them with us, and they had to get free. and obviously I wasn't gripping hard enough to hurt them, but I made sure that it was a challenge to break free. and 95% of the kids were able to break free in mere seconds. the other 5% just needed reminding to pull against the thumb, not the fingers, and then they got it in seconds too. so yeah, most of the jokes about how the hand isn't meant to hold things is sorta true sorta false. it's just better phrased as "the thumb is the weakest point of the hand, so utilize that to break free" just my long rant about self defense lol
@@vaporishbell957 by itself, yes the pinky is weak. However when someone is grabbing you, they are using all their fingers, so the pinky is just added strength. When the pinky is combined with the other fingers, you can't break free against the fingers, even if the weak pinky is involved. It's kinda like math. Would you rather go up against one person (the thumb) or four people (the fingers)?
@@Riverspirit86 I learned it the same way and it does work very well. They really could have explained it better because that is a legitimate skill to escape.
Jack holding the mic and waving his other hand around saying “HAND! … is NOT meant to hold things very well” is giving me like church preacher vibes lmao
Gospel of the hand. How hand work, and tips and tricks you didn't know about hand! Did you know that hand can't actually hold thing well? Not good for resisting dale's subsonic movement. Only good for smashing words together for shitpost. What you didn't know is that human targets, specifically *hand,* is 50-75% weaker against opponents that use the fist of Detroit Dale. Those who've mastered the way of dale ignore armor against untrained opponents, and reaction time is decreased by a full 30% when up against dale masters. Dale himself can pick-pocket your inventory while in combat, hence how he can easily remove a gun from almost anyone's hands! Downside- Dale and any one of his disciples are also 30-50% weaker when up against trained fighters, and approximately 99.999% weaker against combat experts!
10:55 PFFFT I fully see what you mean now lmao It's like one of those churches where everyone is either staring at the Priest in complete fear or awe, or they're cheering and screaming "YEAH! PRAISE JESUS! AMEN!"
That one thing was just to see if you're really being followed by a car. I love that he gave actual advice and said "pull into the nearest police station" instead of "jump out of the car and push his thumb because the hand isn't made to hold things well"
After watching Charlie and his crew meet with Dale, I'd be more inclined to believe that these might work. I think Dale's downfall is that he doesn't explain these are last ditch efforts if you know you're gonna die
He’s said it a few times but not enough. These aren’t l tools to provoke deadly situations. This is to give you a better chance of getting home when the attacker wants to kill you. If you do nothing you’re dead so you have realistic techniques to get you not shot, or if you’re shot not fatally. Dale is a bit of a dick from some of his interviews so he doesn’t explain it. But they are very practical
@@invest-i-gator8896 as someone who grew up heavily emphasizing gun safety. Seeing Jack talk about guns so blatantly wrong was infuriating. It’s just clear to me who’s been in fights and who hasn’t. Cause when you’re in fights you’re like “oh yeah that hand to the nose thing works, hard to fight back when your eyes are watering” but in all reality. The self defense guy is a dick. And he does a shitty job at explaining why because he’s like fuck you I don’t owe you an explanation
Dale os also trained. A regular person who hasn't been in these situations or hasn't been in real rough areas like Detroit wouldn't be able to execute these moves.
I like how Dale or whatever his name is said “you don’t want to hurt them” but shortly after he stuck his fingers in the other guys eyes and falcon punched him in the throat and stomped his knees in.
Charlie's video with Dale is worth a watch. He actually went deeper into the techniques and when to actually use these. He also conceded that these aren't 100% effective, but could improve your chances in certain situations.
Those keychains are actually quite useful. One of the teachers at my brothers old karate school gave me one and showed me a few different ways to use it (I spent far too much time on being homeless as a teen because of a not very nice household). I honestly thought it was pretty silly at the time. Then a couple of months later I got jumped. It's amazing how much pain that silly little keychain can inflict with minimal effort and how much pain it definitely saved me. It's been 30 years and I still carry it with me. So yeah. If you live in a sketchy area I highly recommend getting one and learning how to use it.
Hey got a question did you have a legit good kubaton or a cheap crapy one like in this video or you would get on wish Edit: if you didn't know those key chains are called kubatons
@@lewilewi1800 I got a good one. It's a solid piece of metal with some weight to it. Not like the lightweight ones. I did know it is called a kubaton. I just didn't bother calling it that because whenever I do people just look at me like I'm talking gibberish lol
However, the problem with that keychain, in the beginning, is that I heard if you were to use it for self-defense you can get into some trouble (do I fully remember why/how much trouble, no). I would definitely do research, although it may be handy I heard from several people there are far better things to use. I believe the reason is that the use for that keychain is to be a weapon so it makes you look guilty. I've seen people use tacticle flashlights and they wouldn't get into trouble because the main use of it is to be a flashlight, but "it just so happens to also be a powerful tool to use for self-defense". This is just from what I heard but I would do more research. (also they are said to be able to break windows, you know to get out of a car, they aren't actually capable of doing that from what I've seen as well.)
@@yourmomsdinner yes they can be illegal for example there are some states in Australia where I live that they are illegal and you are also right just a flash light can be very useful but most useful is learning self-defence other then starting to carry stuff like this
Legit, like how the fuck would a caveman get away with tackling and killing a moose or stabbing a lion to death if hands dont hold well? People will literally say anything to sell something, fuck history, I guess.
Nope, sorry. Dale negates that logic. Reality around him bends to his will. He actually has video game stats. All humans, specifically their grip strength, are 50% weaker when up against Dale himself. But if you're a fighting expert, suddenly *he's* 50% weaker. And if you're good that's 100% odds, so uh..
The technique at 10:45 is actually taught in martial arts. He just taught it terribly. The thumb is the easiest to move, which is why this works so well.
I can confirm, I was in Tang Soo Do for 5 years and have seen it taught plenty of times. Anyone lower than red belt wouldn’t be ready for it yet. But yeah, that technique was so bad when he showed it. Frick
12:58 The point where Dale actually gripped on the pistol won't allow the trigger to go off since the barrel is gripped on, this tip is risky but it's not completely useless and obviously the whole point of the tip is to not let the gun fire while you're trying to get the weapon out of the criminals hand. The pistol can't fire if the barrel is blocked and once you're gripped onto the barrel you have easy control of the guns point direction
I took actual self defense courses a few years back and the women who gave the course actually taught us how to break bones if we had to. Like I know how to break someone's nose if need be. At the end of the course we had to break a wooden plank with just our bear hand. Needless to say I did. After watching these videos all I can think of is "Damn, this man can't teach shit. All I could defend myself against is a pillow or a toddler!"
Well , breaking a wooden plank is just to boost your head , breaking a plank dont take much force if you hold it right , if you want a good self defence training I would say go train Krav Maga
The stuff where Dale was talking about the thumbs when they grab your arm or wrist does in fact work and it’s taught in Jiu-Jitsu and yes it works since it puts them in an awkward and somewhat painful position it forces them to let go it doesn’t matter how strong or good of a grip they have as long as you do it properly.
if you get shot in one place that's not immediately lethal, and you're hopped up on adrenaline, getting the gun out of your attacker's control is a lot better than letting them keep it and finish you off.
The statement was kind of stupid but if someone grabs you, the weakest part of the grip is the thumb. So it makes sense to make movements to escape by challenging the thumb instead of the opposing other 4 fingers. But one definetly needs proper training for such situations. Video clips like these can fool people to feel like they know their way around self defence... That abduction prevention video was horrible...
On another note, I really like this new setup where Jack is standing and has a mic. It brings something really new and fresh to reactions and obviously plays off of stand up comedy.
6:11 You gotta love how Dale advises you to use literally every part of that keychain except the pointy bit that at least looks viable as a self defense weapon against an attacker.
@@Biteme1362 In what kind of a f*cked up country is a tiny piece of metal on a key considered as a weapon, as if it mattered if you were using it in self-defence.
@@SlaaneshM30 it's a pointy stake "designed to hurt others". The tiny piece of metal is sold and exists for the sake of being dangerous and being able to inflict pain on others. It might be laughably silly, but the sellers want it to be a weapon, so the government treats it like a weapon. Dunno what government they're even referencing. But it's kinda logical that if something is specifically sold to be a weapon, and it can inflict serious harm onto others if applied with malicious intend, that it is regarded as a weapon.
10:00 Technically the hand really isn't meant to hold things very well, it is meant to grab things and manipulate larger objects, but when it comes holding something tight, all the fingers apply their vectors on different directions and disrupt each other, making the final vector much weaker, specially if we're talking about round objects
I think "retain" rather than "hold" would be a better choice of words. The thumb and nerves around it are the weak point, which is the grain of truth in these multi-grain loaves of bullshit that channel is handing out.
I beg a differ, try having a military man grab on you or anything for that matter. they grip hard and also someone that has nerve damage from the hands to the shoulders has a tight grip as well
The "being followed" advice is actually pretty solid. The 3 left turns are a bit unnecessary but calling the cops is the best option if you suspect you're being followed. Heading towards the nearest police station just gets help to you sooner
I had some creep guy follow my daughter and I from a park and we did this...3 left turns....we lost him on the second turn but we drove a different way home as well.
yeah but if you cant, my mum told me to dont actually head home. if theres a neighboorhood near by turn in there and park in someones driveway, turn off your lights and car. and usually this will get them either lost or confused. if theyre waiting nearby then yes call the cops.
I recognized that type of mic. those are very good at loud vocals like singing and the like(depending on the model has 2 channel with separate volume control if you are using a multichannel mixer)
Actually, the one about driving three rights and three lefts it actually works. I've had to do it twice, once in the states and once overseas. If someone is following you NEVER go home. They'll know where you live and if you're a target for whatever they have planned then it makes you a sitting duck. Always drive to a police station or in my case I drove straight to the military base I lived on and told the gate guards. Both followers fucked off and turned around. It does seem silly I'll agree to that, but it can really help ward off horrible people. And calling 911 on the way is useful because they can either have a cop meet you or have someone waiting for you to arrive, plus since they record its good evidence in case something DOES happen before you can get to safety. Stay safe everyone!!
I used to work a job in the evening (3:30pm-11:30pm) and I was always aware of other cars behind me. If I thought a car had been behind me for too long I'd go past my house, around the block, anything but home. Only once in all the years I worked that job did I feel I was actually being followed. Most just went their own way or even pulled into a driveway themselves a little further down the road. You can feel a little silly, but I'd rather be a little paranoid than a lot dead.
this is good advice for more highly populated areas/cities. If you live in the country or a really small town with nothing but farm land this advice isnt that useful
I've had situations like that as well but then other times I'm going someplace and someone ahead of me thinks I'm following them when I was only going to the same place. For example Walmart to Homedepot, I was behind this guy the through a turn , two lights, and the final two turns to the Walmart. He did a weird circle move and left glaring me down like I was going to do something. Good on him for taking safety but again it was coincidence in that matter with me wanting to go to the same place. I feel bad that I scare them unintentionally.
@@tuel7664 i still remember how shy he was during his old videos and then how energetic he became the more comfortable he got after so many videos, man time flies
4:14 I think what he was trying to say was since the hammer of the gun moves back right when they shoot, if you grab the hammer, it won't shoot. Either way, I don't think anyone would get a good grip of something that slides back and forth really fast
It's still hilarious to me how he literally shows he's not faster than the gun, and then proceeds to demonstrate how to stop the gun by being faster! 😂🤣😂
What most people dont seem to understand for self defence is that the majority of it is recognising the threat before hand and either 1. getting away from the situation or 2. failing that getting the drop on the guy before they get the opportunity to do anything... Being aware of your surroundings at all times aka being "situationally aware" is the best self defence tool you can have.
The aim is NOT to be faster than the gun, but to catch the gun wielder unaware. If I throw my hands in the air, the man with the gun may shoot me, because "WTF is she doing?!". If I quickly grab the slider without him noticing, and push it away, he more than likely WILL still fire, but will end up shooting the wall behind me. Giving me a moment to pull or kick the gun away and escape the situation.
@@diefluchendehexe5775 And you're really gonna bet your life on that? That the gunman won't maybe step back in surprised leaving you still open to be shot, or just shoot the second he sees sudden movements? Nevermind the point I was making about his contradiction, no human is gonna be faster than the trigger pull of a gun, which takes extremely little effort on the part of the gunman. You're literally betting your reflexes against the highly tuned mechanics of a trigger.