I haven't watched the video, but this doesn't sound right. You can and should heal in public too. People should be more public about their woes - then people wouldn't feel so alone in our modern slave work era.
Honestly this at 30 I'm still working on and truly it's because some of us don't have balance for some there's been more lovelessness then love and acceptance so out of fear it becomes almost like an unrealistic control of how we want to be wanted by others or that someone but I say unrealistic because you can't control the way you are valued this world Is certainly not even
I Remember being in Marching Band in high school. We went to Band of America (to preform the marching show ‘Artworks’) and we didn’t place super high, we weren’t able to Polish up the ending before hand, and we knew we could of done better, but all the audience was doing was Cheering. When we came up to the seats, they were chanting ‘red, yellow, blue, green’ over and over, (based on the dance break Sequence were everyone chants those colors repeatedly and we do a little dance, words can’t do it justice) all I’m saying is they didn’t care we didn’t do amazing by our standards, they just saw what was there-a fun show.
another one i live by for romance is "you cant convince someone to love you by giving more of what they already don't appreciate" good luck everyone and remember, you are worth it!
@@saltminer4463 I wasn't really talking about liberals either, but conservative states are filled with old people, where you will get hate crimes for simply wearing a pride pin on your hat (atleast where I live, west virginia is a shit state for the most part)
This dude is actually gonna clutch up this generation. Most older men are js making garbage how to get laid content. Like jelqing, mewing whatever the fck. This dude is genuinely honest and real.
“there’s artwork everywhere, some people don’t like this artwork but go put it in another museum people will worship it” 1:57 those are some beautiful words❤
The positive male role model the internet actually needs. No toxicity, no belittling, just straight facts and positivity! And his advice can be applied by everyone! Keep doing what you're doing bro! Love this!
Rejection is protection. Being rejected by someone who would've simply used and abused u had u been attractive in "their" eyes is a blessing! Trust God's wisdom in your creation.
“You are just looking at yourself from the eyes of other people and that is corrupt.” Man, thank you for that statement 😭🙏🏿. I really! Appreciate this 🙌🏾
@@GoatSimpulator Their opinions and how they treat you will never be something you can control. People who thrive in hostile environments thrive by knowing they are something else, and that their immediate surroundings don't determine them. People might treat you wrong, even sometimes without ill intent. You cannot be determined by that. So listen to what they're telling you, but then think for yourself. Take in data, analyse, determine what's useful, and dispose of the rest. Sometimes, they'll have things you can use to understand yourself. Sometimes they don't know sh*t so whatever they say or do can't matter at all. Sometimes they'll have advice for something that just doesn't apply to you, and doesn't align with your personal goals. Like hell, I suck at hunting. It isn't a problem for me, I don't hunt to eat and it was never part of my goals. So no matter how many times people insult my inability to hunt I won't feel the least worried or diminished. Similarly, *when you know who you are and where you want to go, then you will decide what gets to you.* That's why "judging yourself with their opinions" makes no sense.
@@Kiwi_DeFruit Wow that's quite a paragraph lol but sound advice my dude, thank you... I'm just saying if you are a person who tries to value other people's opinions, it sucks when their opinion of you isn't favorable for some reason you can't change (people thinking they can go over or back me down easily simply because of my height or size). I don't like constant confrontation but I'm also not one to back down from aggression so my life is filled with drama.
As an Asain male, I thought always looked unattractive. I hear people around me always tell me I have an amazing smile. But the more I look in the mirror at myself, the more confident I am in the way my face looks! Attraction will come naturally when it's the right person.
I have the exact opposite thing, my resting bitch face (I'm a Latvian) look solid, don't wanna be that guy but for sure above average, but seeing my smile makes me get rid of it.
As a person of color I find Asian men to be extremely attractive. I've grown up seeing a lot of girls dissing Asian men,but know there are some gems out there who aren't like that and find yall attractive
i’m 25 and i’ve been single my whole life while people around me are coupling up, so my self esteem and mood have been really shit. this came at such a perfect time that i couldn’t help but cry. thank you for your words and the motivation. i will work on bettering myself while learning to be kinder to myself.
Everybody's path is different. We might've been placed in the same environment in daycare and taught the same stuff in high school. But once you become an adult, you look around you, and everyone else starts separating from you and forging their own path in life. It's so, so difficult to really implement into your life. But there is really no strict blueprint for how one should live their life, no matter how much we're conditioned in childhood. You don't have to have a romantic partner at a certain milestone. You can go look for it if it's what you really want, but you have to look out for yourself first and foremost. Don't feel pressured to get into a relationship just because everyone else around you is in one. Let it happen when it's supposed to happen.
I figured this out when I realized I was attracted to traits that societal consensus deemed as 'ugly'. People have different tastes, and beauty is in everything
@@truemori6700you’re beautiful, courageous, caring, thoughtful, and loving, I’m so sorry you haven’t had that special day, but just know I love you. This life can be so hard sometimes, I know how hard it may be to get out of bed in the morning, to feel unappreciated. But I appreciate you, you’re struggling, and that’s okay, you’re so much stronger than you think. We’re all here for you. I love you! ❤️
A world of everyone being attractive to everyone else would be a nightmare. We already see relationships broken over infidelity with some of the ugliest people I've ever seen in my life.
social media conditions us to believe we are ugly, they come up with new insecurities to make people feel shame every 5 business days. social media detox is important.
@@mil-kw9ziit affects people with overconsumption but it depends on what you use it for, some people base their whole life on social media. Then there’s others that use it for interests hobbies, entertainment or learning purposes.
Seriously though. Get out of your house and just go do something else for a few days. Book the cheapest hostel in a town nearby, go walk in the woods. It helps a lot.
I dont use social media much at all and only really use RU-vid reviews, vids like this and some gaming channels and yet I still see those perfect models and streamers pop up all the time anyways. I see them everywhere in movies and shows. There is no escape and even knowing everyone has different taste and types doesnt help. There is no niche set of people whod find me attractive and never will be, there is no being happy unless id magically be one of those perfect people everyone loves. Im glad other people can come to terms and be confident despite it but not all of can or have reasons to be happy with a body that I cant stand being in🤷♂️
He gives me such Bob Ross vibes. He speaks so gentle and informatively. Edit: do not associate this comment with race because race has nothing to do with it. Bob Ross was a legend + a lovely gentleman, and this guy evokes the same aura in my opinion. Please don’t get offended by this comparison.
THANK YOUUUUU. No one understands when i say i do my makeup and dress nice and do my hair everyday for MYSELF. I really could not care less what someone on the street thinks of me, it just makes ME feel good when I look good.
My heart melted when he said "Don't y'all know that you're still growing and morphing into your bodies" To anyone reading this please find confidence in the fact that you are blooming into a beautiful flower!🥺
@@solus8685 haha I feel you on that. There are definitely days where it's the opposite for me. I'm not always the kindest to myself, so I do need that reminder that if there's love out there, there can be love within me as well. I'm hoping the two aren't mutually exclusive!
i really enjoyed the pep talk. Even though i already realized being focused on dating culture is not healthy, and how sexualizing everything isn't healthy, this genuinely was still more helpful than any other video about "men suicide more" and "dating sucks". none of that, just "be the best you"
honestly this is probably the hardest a youtube video ever hit me. recently i’ve been the only person bringing myself up and motivating myself, but sometimes it just doesn’t work since i’m the only one telling myself this. everybody has been bringing me down recently and i’ve been bullied in the past. i really needed this since self confidence is not my forte, i hate the way i look and i’ve been working on loving myself, but it hasn’t worked. i needed to hear this, thank you.
i’ve been crying for about an hour just because of how ugly and lonely i feel and this video made my tears dry up. really made me realize that i needed to stop looking for validation from others ❤
@@acidicsoul4978That's maybe a nice try to lighten the day of someone but tbh the person does not want to hear that because for them their focus is elsewhere, all you say is "Stop complaining there are african children that are starving." That's not the point, just because someone sufferes more doesnt mean that you have problems that you see as something big
No lie your videos actually have helped me i stopped watching porn i started working out i started focusing on myself i started to stop overthinking about everything i finally could of talked to people without being scared Thank you so much shimon for your help
This is a beautiful response. I just found your video @askshimon, and I must say... very calm, cool, collected and wise words. I hope they help many many others. 💫
This right here arrived on my feed at THE most perfect time in my recent life. Much love for making this vid man, good reminder to keep my head up and wear the crown, it aint about how others think but what's within you and your qualities 👑🙏
Yoooo! Look at this young man speaking with an old man's wisdom! I appreciate everything you said, and wish I knew at your age what you have already figured out. Keep learning, growing, and sharing. You really did some good work, here!
Every man and woman needs to hear this. Can't stress it enough. Me and my fiance have been together 9 years. We are inseparable. Completely effortless and blissful. And the secret sauce is we've never had to be anyone other than ourselves.
Plus working together even if it get's hard. Every lastig relationship went through at least one huge crisis together. And not breaking up over stupid nonsense
9 years together and still not married, mf that’s not a fiancé that’s a concubine 💀 be surprised if that shit lasted another few years idk how she ain’t fed up with your non commitment
Hey, you got any advice about 'shooting your shot'? I'm in Middle School and there is this girl I really like that I am really good friends with but don't have enough confidence to shoot my shot. As you said, you have been together for 9 years, so you must have some advice, and that would mean a lot. If you see this, thank you in advance.
@@braydenkaiser33I'm in middle school too and I have had this problem alot before I met my boyfriend who I've been with for almost a year. I recommend just be yourself and tell your brain to shut up and go with it. It's not easy but it's helpful, do your best to calm down your nerves beforehand. If she says yes, awesome. If she says no, that's okay too just remember to heal and focus on your growth as a person. As you said that you and her are friends, just act as you normally would (If that means being yourself, if you can't be yourself around someone then they aren't for you) I hope this helps, goodluck))
As a Muslim girl I absolutely love the advice you’ve given in the video. I don’t date because I practice my religion intently but I love educating myself about the world and how I can be confident in my own body without needing attention from others.
you have been a gem for me. today has been so rough, and scrolling on youtube, i found your channel. i feel better and i know that you’re an amazing human being. thank you so much for your kind and caring words . 💛
" when you find someone for you, you do not have to play games. It is harder for you to get RID of them, than it is to make them like you". Wow, I had to listen to it multiple times, the make sure I got it right. I never thought about this.
Someone who likes you will like you as you are - you wont have to put on a facade to impress them. And it’s harder to get rid of them because if you realize you guys might not meant to be, they’ll be reluctant to leave you because they like you as a person and don’t wanna lose you.
I really needed to hear this. I've been feeling pretty insecure about features of myself that I can't change and that's led me to be very self-conscious. I'm quite lanky for my age and my hair isn't growing how I want it. I found this video around a month ago and ever since then, I've been going to the gym consistently and eating right so I can start bulking, my facial hair's started to come through, I've started taking care of my skin, sleeping earlier to reduce pimples. I feel much more free than I used to and it mostly stems from me working so that I can be happy with myself rather than with how other people see me. God bless you brother. You're doing good work out here🙏🏾
Also don’t get stuck in the trap of trying to impress people. Just keep being you and you’d find someone who likes that. Otherwise you’re just pretending and that’s no way to live.
been there brother, live and learn you just gotta have that wake up call one day and realize you’re worth more than being dragged along by someone who only enjoys the attention you give them. glad you have woken up and i wish you the best on your journey of loving yourself
my major problem is comparassion. I am not ugly, a lot of people find me cute, but I always strugle comparing me with a lot of beautiful ladies, ig models, etc. I am not the type of beuty that I like, i have not a thin face, slin body, wavy hair, big eyes, i am overweight, big face, hooded eyes, afro hair and i hate that
The greatest gift you can give yourself is internalizing the fact that life is not a competition. Wealth, beauty, education, culture all these things become descriptors rather than caste partitions when you understand that you are of equal value to everyone else. Be blessed on your journey.
One advice I can give you is to follow ppl who look like you! Seeing them being beautiful will make you realize you're beautiful too and maybe give you some inspo for hairstyles and outfit that look good on your type of hair and body :)
"You're just looking at yourself through the eyes of other people." - Shimon Davis. This one hits hardest for me. So true and so simple that it makes everything clear.
I used to linger on my looks so much just to get older and realize no matter what you do to for your looks you won't be everyone's type. Adjust yourself for yourself and you'll attract the right things and people
The problem is when you're proven to be no ones type. Everyone says this stuff but they always can find people who are attracted to them... im sorry to say but short, ugly, skinny, and pale guys are no ones type and never will be so
this is what i mean by body neutrality… i dont care what you think i look like because it doesn’t matter. i won’t change what i like about myself for someone because the minute you want me to change such personal aspects about myself is the minute i know you don’t like me how my person should
"why would you use their opinions to judge yourself", is when I shed a tear. I have always seen myself through the lens of other peoples eyes. I felt like a lot of us needed to hear this.. and be hit by something particular. I can't tell you or stress to you HOW much I needed to hear this. I have been going through a rough time, and everyone I talk to kind of brushes it off or doesn't know what to say, so this was exactly what I didn't know I needed.
My mother was never a woman I listened to often, people called her crazy and she mistreated me when I was younger. But as I grew up I began to see her struggle, not that it makes it okay, and that she was never crazy. Mean and cruel out of mislead love, yes. But never crazy, I love my momma. When I turned eighteen she told me something that truly stuck with me, something that I think only she could say I could understand from her. “Always be yourself, truly. And watch how people react. Their reactions tell you everything you need to know.” If you are being yourself, and you are being put down, or judged. Or made to feel crazy or like your emotions are being brushed off, do not take anything THOSE people say about you as word of law. If they are being cruel and mean, not trying to help, only saying things from a place of hatred. Do not listen. Those who care, who want to be in your life, who value your emotions, will show that. People show that differently, but you can tell. You can’t value the opinions of everyone about you. Try to focus on your opinion of yourself, and the opinions of those who truly care. If you look around and see nobody truly cares, look inside yourself. And you have to search for people people who do. I hope you know that the opinions of those who only want to tear you down, and hurt you. Those who have never wanted to see you happy or succeed, or those who don’t value your worth mean nothing. I am a random person on the internet and I care about your well being dude, as long as you’re striving to be the best you, I think you’re doing great. If a random person cares this much, someone out there who knows you better will care 1000000x times are much dawg
There’s a quote that goes “we all ugly to somebody.” And that is what keeps me confident. I couldn’t care who likes me, finds me attractive, or not- I am who I am ✨🤷🏾♀️ took awhile to get here, but working on one’s self is veryyy important.
I *just* found this video, and boy is it powerful. Pretty much everything this guy said hit the bullseye. I’ve always been pretty secure with myself physically, but I always had issues with people and my personality. Sometimes I feel like I’m unappealing to be around just because of the negative side of my personality showing on my face. I get irritated easily by small things, and it’s something I’ve always struggled with. I’ve been trying so hard to right myself personality-wise, but maybe I don’t need to rush to fix it. Maybe I just need to focus on myself and wait for God to put the right person into my life, and just surf the waves at they come, rather than try to rush against the current. Thank you, dude. New subscriber here. God bless you for this powerful message.❤
im in high school right now and really struggling with people pleasing, among other things. it’s like this video came across at the perfect time. your words come out so comforting and trustworthy, thank you for helping people
Shimon, just makin sure you know you got me to go 34 days no drugs or alcohol. I was around a bit before Christmas at my rock bottom then i clicked one of your vids. Thank you for what you do and keep making good content
I am a latina woman and I just wanted to say, you are a beautiful man. You have an angelic face and you are very soft spoken. I could listen to your voice for hours. Everything you said was 100% true.
Thank you so much for this important message I’ve been dealing with insecurities and not being confident in myself cause of they way I look but after watching this video! You have really helped me, I’ve been bullied my whole and named called by other people. I truly wanna say thank so much for this!❤🥺😊
So true. On top of that, your shyness is actually attractive. Being nervous and shy when meeting a girl, not knowing what to say, saying simple and "unoriginal" things is attractive - if you're genuine. Be genuine, even if that means being shy, or silent, or not smiling - even when you approach, especially then - is the most attractive thing you can do. Don't listen to dating coaches, don't use techniques, don't play games. And you'll find lots of people who would want to hang around with you.
I cannot tell you how much I needed this. Seeing other girl (and guy) 'friends' seem more happy and social than me has destroyed my self-esteem, but videos like this and meditations on this I do by myself are really helping me. Thank u
'develop your sense of self worth from _internal standards_ and not incessant comparisons' reclaiming the self-esteem that's been stripped away over years is tricky, but worth the effort. healing takes time.
Bro I took your advice about doing something different for different results and whatnot. Changed my life in a weekend. I knew you were right, I was just scared of the unknown. After a couple of weeks you convinced me. Thank you my friend
This is one of the best youtube videos ive ever watched, and ive took alot from it. I always stay in relationships way past due, i stay with people who dont treat me right cause of the fear of not finding another person after. I always find when the relationships do happen to come by its always when im in my best state of mind, the time when i stop yearning for a relationship and instead yearn for the love of myself is when i always find love. I have a hard time letting go of my ex especially when they have a new person they are talking to every month and i havent even had a crush since we dated. It makes me feel like im in a rush to find another relationship too, like im meant to move on as fast as he did but im starting to love myself and what i do again and who hes with doesn't effect me. Thank you for this video it was a beautiful reminder, keep doing what you do and spreading whats positive💗
"some people may not like this artwork, but go put it in another museum and people will worship it." "until you realize it, it will not come out" "We are not all meant to be attracted to everything." my God. I needed that.
For some reason your room aesthetic reminds me of Prince. I prefer to be single, happy, healthy and at peace than to run after people and convince them that I deserve a chance. I used to pray for inner peace, that's my treasure ❤🙏🏻
Thank you for this..I’m going through heartbreak rn. This helped me find closure. I was wanting to sleep and not think about it but this video popped up when I needed it. Thank you for helping me heal
“there artwork everywhere, some people don’t like that artwork, but put it somewhere else and it’ll be worshipped” is such an amazing mentality, i actually got chills. i love this guy!
This is like a watered down and MUCH more down to earth version of those "mindset"-influencers, with advice that's actually valuable to a lot of people! Awesome job 👍
As a 19 year old black male in his first year of college this video really resonated with because of the simple fact that I’m always self Conscious and wondering how I look to other people , watching this video made me realize that maybe I’m not focusing on myself as much as I think I am. Thank you for this
Its 1am in the morning after a very stressful week of self reflection, intellectual challenges, phycological and soul bending experiences. I'm having a 2 lb steak and yogurt wondering who I am at 30. And I cant tell you how much I needed this. Thank you brother man, +1 to the tribe
In 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, it is written, "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies." This suggests the importance of taking care of ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
I grew up and still live in a white town as a black girl. I could never find people I liked interested in me and thought it was my fault. Like I tried so many times and nobody liked me and I chalked it up to not being attractive enough. I know this isn’t true but sometimes it’s super hard to think otherwise. Your words hit so close to home and are very comforting thank you
This is beautiful! This is something I've just started learning on my own and I'm about to be 28. I hope this reaches a younger crowd so the can shine brighter earlier in their future and excellence the process of finding self love. Keep up with the content ✌🏾
Spreading the most important crucial knowledge to the youth than any one else i been seeing on this platform recently 💯 but u are definitely amongst some of the most soul touching ones 🙏🏾 keep up the work
