Your Rude Coworker Will Regret Insulting You When You Say This

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If you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker who is undermining your ideas, criticizing your work, or insulting you at work, you need to watch this. This type of coworker is incredibly toxic - until you know exactly how to shut them down instantly. In this video, you’ll learn how to make your rude coworker stop, scripts of what to say to stand up for yourself with confidence (and in a way that makes you look like a powerful professional), and the secret to never being insulted at work again.
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Chapters
0:00 Intro
0:21 The mistake 90% of people make
1:31 Two power moves you must make
3:04 Literally…
4:40 The Dinner Party Reaction
5:55 Starve them of the ONE thing they really want
7:44 Callout questions you need to have ready
9:35 The secret to being uninsultable
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Опубликовано:

4 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 77

@Uksoapfan Год назад

Hence why I never socialize with co workers, ever. I keep a strict boundary. I have friends who I have known since pre school so I hang out with them. Colleagues are just that and nothing ever more.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Sounds you have thoughtful and inventional boundaries!

@Uksoapfan Год назад

@@JenniferBrick Sadly escaping loud and disruptive co workers is not easy, especially if they are one of the boss' cronies and can take advantage of that a bit.

@IrmaRoma68 Год назад

I had to learn that the hard way

@IrmaRoma68 Год назад

I work in a clinic as a therapist. I have a female co-worker who offered to help me find a car when I first started working there. She came to my house and the next day she said my house was haunted that she was psychic and was attached by a spirit that lived in my house. After that two months later she insulted me for not having moved out yet. I live on a 3 acre vineyard it’s absolutely gorgeous. That she said something at work about my ponytail that it was thin and started laughing. Than when I started seeing our chiropractor for my back she started seeing him too. At the Christmas party she wanted to know what I was wearing and when I told her she said it was too sexy so she showed up in a very exposed outfit. She requested to be my friend on Instagram and when I saw her at work she said I was naked on Instagram? I workout and was wearing gym clothes. Last Wednesday I said in the staff room my hips are tight and she said you need to get laid and fucked real good. Friday I had a family emergency and she kept asking me personal questions and I lost it. She tried setting me up on a blind date with her friend in the past too. I told the owners after she stormed out of the staff room for no reason on Friday because I wasn’t responding to her at all. She low emotional intelligence and jealous. I told my boss I will quit if this continues. I told her never to contact me again. She is off my phone and Instagram. Never mix work with your personal life.

@seanmysel5823 Год назад

I remember getting called, "a fat spaghetti sauce salesman" by a co-worker and remember just turning around, smiling and saying, "well somebody in here has to put some sauce into the sales figures..." Then this eruption of, "OHHHHHHHHH!" happened and I got taken out to lunch by my co-workers. Well, the guy that insulted me got to eat out of a brown bag by himself. Great video!

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Loled out loud. Responding with humor is the best.

@seanmysel5823 Год назад

@Jennifer Brick a heavy dose of Stoicism (ie not caring what this person said) didn't hurt either

@patrickglaser1560 10 месяцев назад

I ain't buying sauce from a skinny chef;)

@pattigibson4396 Год назад

I loved this video. I had a work "friend" who I realised would take as many opportunities as possible to low key insult me, even about things that were not true. I realised that for her, it was a way of establishing dominance and used to cringe and take her insults to heart. Eventually, I learned to ask her if she was ok, or to ask if she felt better after getting the bile out of her system. She never knew how to respond. Slowly, by degrees, I put distance between myself and her. Life is too short to fill it with toxicity.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Agree with you hard on that last part!

@victoriacorcoran1258 Год назад

So true Jennifer. I looked at her and said "What" when she said "settle down" I went to the staffroom picked up my bag and walked. She had 3 rounds and shot them.

@careercarepackage Год назад

Wow, love this. I find the passive aggressive insults the worst - the digs that are so subtle you're not quite sure if you've been targeted. When this happens to me I find I self reflect as to why I'm upset. The bit you said about uninsultable at the end helps, because things can only hurt if you believe there's some truth to it. That said it also helps me 100% to take action on it and the steps you've outlined are great as they are so practical.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Exactly! When we *know* something isn't true or is something we accept about ourselves we don't get offended. But just because we're bothered doesn't mean we don't need to be ready to respond.

@davidellis5141 Год назад

Good Morning Jennifer 😊 - I generally try & ignore or be indifferent to a snarky remark & failing that deflect the question right back at the person or ask an odd question of them that they aren't anticipating. I don't let myself get triggered. Have a great day ! 🌞

@JenniferBrick Год назад

That's the way to do it, David! Hope you're having a great day.

@RonnieWisdom Год назад

This is a powerful video! I love the clarifying questions and usually ask them too. This makes the person think about what they are saying, and helps me to call out their BS and note that I l see their intentions. Once the boundary has been set, they will never cross it again.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

I think of a lot of people speak without intent. Those questions make them aware... and I really don't think most people want to be jerks.

@yukio_saito Год назад

Waliking away is my favorite one. I use it as the first step to deal with them. Don't give them a chance to speak to you.

@BBenoist Год назад

Taking things at face value is really good advice because too often the message delivered was not the message sent.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Our intrepretations aren't always correct. This can save miscommunications!

@user-qi7bc7ix5m 5 месяцев назад

Im autistic and have changed offices and the person “in charge” of helping familiarizing me with their systems is absolutely AWFUL. They have the office convinced im rude when all Im doing is being autistic. Im not hurting anyone or trying to but am not letting her treat me badly. Which has set this in motion. I don’t know what to do. I am being reminded I’m still in my three month probation period by my manager. Your videos are helping immensely ❤ thank you

@Sileaine Год назад

Would love to see this role played out

@jgmatp 6 месяцев назад

Just found you on here a week ago or so. Because, you guessed it, I have a new 'toxic' co-worker that I have to deal with. Your advice on the many of your videos that I've seen is absolutely top notch! Just wanted to say thank you!

@jlynngambler Год назад

It would be helpful to have some skits to show examples of scenarios with both passive-aggressive and intentional offenders and different things one can say or do in various situations.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

I'm working on some shorts!!

@jlynngambler Год назад

@@JenniferBrick Great! I think it would be really helpful 😄

@sophieszabo1771 Год назад

@JenniferBrick Agreed, looking forward to those shorts! Thanks for your videos, super helpful!

@deeptis7702 Год назад

Aaah, I wish I saw this video sooner. So much gold in this video.

@DanielleFerreira-kt7ix Год назад

I guess these questions can really disarm a toxic commenter...

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Make them show their hand. Most don't want to and will backpedal and gaslight, but they won't try you again.

@barackillbombya3835 Год назад

She is so wonderful!

@laselecta9012 Год назад

I use the clarifying questions all the time! I also highly like the part u mention in the end about liking yourself. When you respect yourself others will respect you as well. As long as you know how to set the proper boundaries with people of course .

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Confidence is contagious. We can each become that person no one messes with, not because of fear, but because the vibe we give off they know that no one (including us) will stand for it.

@SugaRosh Год назад

Spot on!❤

@unknownbrokenlink Год назад

Jennifer, you are just awesome. Thank you for yet another informative video. This one was gold! I actually have used some of these strategies before wtih toxic coworkers but I have definitely learned some new ones I can try if needed because of this video.

@JenniferBrick Год назад

So happy I could add a few extras to your toxic coworker toolbox 💜

@angelapruisman536 Год назад

Awesome video and tips, thank you! I'm a medical professional and work with what I would describe as "chronic incivility". Not sure if this is related to stress, but it can make an already stressful situation even more stressful. Will try your suggestions when appropriate.

@teacherof20 Год назад

Thank you!

@JanusLoggie Год назад

I never have these problems, as I'm always prepared to play a "Reverse Card", But I still love listening to your expertise!

@JenniferBrick Год назад

I'm glad you still hang with me, even when you've mastered the topic!

@evanvelardi Год назад

I cant get from your videos and expertise jennifer!!! Love it 😁

@Princess_Of_Flowers Год назад

Omg, this arrives just in time! Thank you so much!! 💕

@JenniferBrick Год назад

I hope it helps you!!

@Princess_Of_Flowers Год назад

@@JenniferBrick It totally does and I am sharing it with my friends, just as your other videos! You rock!! ✨

@evanvelardi Год назад

X2, jennifer you just saved my job 😁when we have lazy coworkers and talk about them and their BS we are putting our job at risk😂we need to play the game 😁and i am playing very well😂

@ninijellybeanie6853 7 месяцев назад

“Is she going to take that?”…. that’s a hard one for me grrrrrrrr !!!! #toxiccoworkersstink

@alicea9823 Год назад

This was too fast, I had to rewatch it again

@JenniferBrick Год назад

You can change the playback speed too.

@juliebell4545 6 месяцев назад

Give an example of Taking it at face value

@megaposter2437 Год назад

I got through a lot of toxicity by genuinely not understanding that it was malicious. 😅 I have a really difficult coworker that will just change topic (to something else toxic) when asked clarifying questions, so it's impossible to navigate that smoothly, but on the other hand she screws herself over more than anyone else.

@elayned6147 Год назад

Awesome ❤👍👍👍

@tanyag6917 Год назад

New sub🤗this is great

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Welcome, Tanya!

@desireebedocssteelees6483 Год назад

I really wish you would make a video about how respond to comments with examples. Like exact examples and what words/Phrases you would say. I need specific examples! 😢😢😢 I know wording is very important and I always seem to not say it right

@PaulaC-137 9 месяцев назад

Regarding taking something literally to de-scalate: years ago I was working as IT support and a coworker sent a very angry and unprofessional ticket stating something like 'I am tired of this BS system'. English is not my first language so I did not connect those dots and I genuinely replied to him "We don't have any system called BS, can you send me a screenshot of the system you are referring to?". Immediately his tone changed to polite, even apologetic. He never explained what BS was short for, but when my teammates saw the exchange, they told me what it meant and we had a good laugh.

@JenniferBrick 9 месяцев назад

🤣🤣🤣

@saritaylor3648 Год назад

This needs examples

@francescajohnson6868 Год назад

This happened to me today, she through her tenure

@makeda.andrews Год назад

OMG, am I the only one that likes brussels sprouts?

@JenniferBrick Год назад

I did come around to then after several months of cooking then with bacon and maple syrup.

@makeda.andrews Год назад

@@JenniferBrick yessss! So good

@sbattle4787 10 месяцев назад

I didn't know about these things to do instead I prayed to Jesus and He started turning their lives upside down and they became afraid of me and left me alone.

@icem6765 Год назад

Jennifer I have a weird situation. We work from home and my co worker normally sends memes about me to my other co workers in secret groups which I'm not a part of but everyone else including my supervisor are. So I notice they all grinning at me during rhe meetings and I dont know how to defend myself. What should I do?

@megaposter2437 Год назад

In other words, someone is talking behind your back.

@icem6765 Год назад

@@megaposter2437 obviously 🙄 . I was asking her how do u cope or handle these things

@lastraven7205 Год назад

@@icem6765 start interviewing at other companies

@nikkip8272 Год назад

Hi! What to do when your manager is the evel 😢 spirit?

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Plot an escape is generally my answer. I've worked with clients who've had narcissist bosses who they were able to get on the good side by appealing to their tendencies but that's a bit trickier.

@nikkip8272 Год назад

@@JenniferBrick Thank you Jennifer! I think you are right. Have a nice day!

@jdrpodcasts9302 Год назад

Hi Jennifer I have a question. I have ADHD and it’s negatively affecting my workload and my relationships with my colleagues. Should I reveal to my boss and coworkers that I have the condition?

@Dee14444 10 месяцев назад

No itmay get used against you. Revealing personal info may not be perceived professionally.

@PaulaC-137 9 месяцев назад

I am also curious for Jennifer's answer about this, I have ADHD myself and I have thought about this and talked with other people about disclosing the condition. Even in places where you cannot be fired or discriminated for a condition by law, it is legitimate to be scared about disclosing something so personal, that many people don't properly understand and that could work against us even in the form of unconscious bias. But what you can always do is to ask for accommodations to better manage these issues. Is your environment too distracting? Maybe you can move to another desk, or use headphones. Are you getting too many interruptions? Tell your team you need to focus and not to interrupt for the next two hours unless the building is on fire... Of course, depending on your job, the challenges are going to be different and you need to get creative with the solutions, and present them to your manager and your team as ways to be more efficient and work better and with better results.

@t28mcd Год назад

If someone says I've gained a few pounds I take it as a compliment. 💪🙂

@dragoda Год назад

Re take the video in the current situation when everyone is at home and chatting and insulting themself on microsoft teams and not face to face. How do you handle this online?

@JenniferBrick Год назад

Not everyone is at home, and companies are capitalizing on everything going on to drag things back in the office. And why do you think human interaction is different online (though Darwin awards should be handed out to anyone dumb enough to put direct insults into monitored company comm platforms).