Loch Kelly, M.Div., LCSW, is an award-winning author, meditation teacher, psychotherapist, and founder of the 501(c)(3) non-profit, Effortless Mindfulness Institute. lochkelly.org/
Effortless mindfulness, also known as nondual mindfulness, is an ancient wisdom practice that integrates with contemporary neuroscience and psychology. It is an advanced, yet simple, next stage of mindfulness. Effortless mindfulness allows you to shift out of your small chattering mind and into an already awake compassionate mind - any time of the day.
Loch is known for his warm sense of humor and his trust that awakening is the next natural stage of development.
“Loch Kelly is one of the clearest expressions of authentic, awakened freedom and love that I know.” ~ Adyashanti
Pity is Not empathy! Empathy is being with a person in their experience, whatever they are experiencing. Compassion is actively working towards easing the suffering of another. Empathy is a being with another in their suffering. Empathy is the Yin to Compassion which is the Yang, both are needed in love, healing and interdependent awareness. Lower forms of Empathy come from parts so can lead to burnout, just like lower forms of compassion that come from parts rather than Self can lead to compassion fatigue. IFS keeps citing one lone study to demonize empathy. Tanya's study has a questionable definition of empathy and meta studies on empathy do not support her claims. I embrace Ifs but it's understanding of empathy is very flawed. There is a huge difference between compassion coming from a part , which is what leads to compassion fatigue and compassion coming from Self which is boundless. The same is true with empathy. Empathy from a part leads to burnout because it references the therapist's part's suffering. Empathy from Self is a being with the unique experience of the other, not arising from one's own part's experience so it is boundless. Dick Schwartz uses this kind of empathy all the time in his demonstrations when Dick selflessly or from Self reflects the feelings of the client. It is beautiful to witness and completes the experience of compassion as the yin completes the yang.
I find I am aware from my jaw and throat area. It just seems to originate strongly from there instead of the heart area. Does any of this matter? Thanks for any insight.
How are you aware that you are aware from that area? Part of the pointing out techniques show that there is no base of awareness, it's not from the heart, it's not from the head and it's not from the throat and jaw. It's just pure awareness without a location. I might suggest that perhaps you are mindful of that area, rather than from that area.
I have tried other apps like Headspace and Waking Up and now I use mindful glimpses which is first time I have found inner peace and ongoing joy. What a gift!
Wow thank you Mukti- as a fellow sponge/ porous being this was very timely for me as the stillness is deepening and thickening , thank you both for such wonderful conversation ❤
This distinction, and the interweaving nature of the therapeutic and the spiritual is so important. It's the first time I hear this is explicitly mentioned and explored. As a therapist I (try to) navigate this on a daily basis with my clients. I am really happy with your exchange of views. Would love to explore further. Thank you both so much.
Beautiful conversation, thank you. Addressing those aspects of self that have been marginalized and welcoming them back home is key to awakening. Trying to step over or ignore what's already been dismissed or put in shadow simply adds further pain to those aspects of psyche that are often very young, even pre-verbal and pre-cognitive, parts. I started my conscious investigation into spirituality with The Power of Now and then discovered another well-known spritual teacher to whom I devoted 8 years. These 8 years brought many insights, shifts and recognitions/glimpses of my deeper nature, but at the same time I further pushed my ego into very painful places in order to do away with it completely. It got to a point that I was asked to leave the community and get some counselling. This started me on a more healthy path to slowly build my fragile ego, bring self-compassion and empathy to my personal self and realise that all of me is Divine, as are all parts of everyone. The body has to be included in awakening. We are in a body for a reason. And, the old emphasis on pure awareness at the cost of our humanity, as though it wasn't Divine, is extremely damaging and wrong-minded. Embodied Inclusion 🙏💞
So true and vital If consciousness is all is love harming and neglecting this wonderful vessel we were gifted by life would be the utmost hybris- in my eyes It’s the human seeking to be God, when God is in all humanity of us - we are both- I’m so glad you found your way
Gold! This worked like a charm for me on something today and then I had the total freedom and space to inquire into it which was incredibly fruitful. I also added the step "spacious awareness is taking the shape of this feeling" which I could feel removed the subtle sense of the feeling as any kind of intrusion. Thank you for these tools!
As a nihilistic form of spirituality becomes prevalent on youtube I'm ever more grateful that Adya was my introduction to awakening...watching him do Q and A's taught me inquiry in such an intimate, alive way that serves me to this day. And Loch's tactile glimpse pointers are a great compliment to that to get somatically oriented to what has been awakened to. The arising of say an unexpected bit of anxiety can be "spiritually zapped" or it can be like the prize in the cracker jack box saying "look here!" Just today I used Loch's series of shifts to get space around something that was arising until it was no longer a bother and could have easily stopped there and went on with my day but I inquired into it and had an absolutely amazing journey with it from childhood to right now. Can't thank these guys enough for these incredible tools. 🙏🙏🙏
Hay Loch! Your meditation app is quite insightful. I have experience coding my own meditation app called Leshpngo. If you ever need some help with your glimpses app, I would gladly donate my free time to help your mindful mission!
Great video. At the end there's a discussion about how it feels in the body. I get similar feelings in my body watching this as I get watching ASMR videos. I wonder, Loch, if you're familiar with ASMR? Could there be some connection between ASMR and what's being shared in this video?
And yes, the felt sense of local awareness - the "sensation" itself of local attention, open that felt sense of sensing all the way out 360 degrees to the totality of perception. That takes me right there. :)
Yessss. Pause the momentum of mind/reactivity/contraction/suffering, re-connect with the felt sense of being/space/openness/totality, re-approach situation. In addition to the sublime freedom and functionality where there once was endless tail chasing, it can be absolutely stunning what is seen from there, the layers and layers of conditioning/associations/chain of events. Thank you for sharing every patient detail of this. It is received and incredibly helpful. 🥰
Thank you. I enjoyed this but it was mostly over my head and my experience. However I agreed and somewhat shared Sam’s experience with your guided mediation towards the end. That question “what is here when there is no problem to solve?” did something that I don’t know how to explain but was quite remarkable and felt sacred to me (for lack of better description.)
I found you through the Waking Up app! Your glimpse practices are vary nuanced!! Then theres the book Shift Into Freedom which is my favorite I've ever read!!! Thanks Loch!!!!
You direct these so well. I think I know what's gonna happen, enjoy the vibrations and the breathing then you make me realise I'm focusing from my head and then drop me into presence. You always do it.
Unconditional positive regard is a mofo! Any expression can be interpreted charitably or uncharitably, not just in therapy. Think of an argumentative person poking holes in a metaphor by intentionally taking an interpretation that contradicts the metaphor. We do this all the time, negative confirmation bias. We think something is wrong and "choose" to interpret it from negative regard and from doing so we see the negative that we just projected on to it. And when we do this, ultimately we suffer. We're annoyed or in conflict with this negative interpretation we just created. Unconditional positive regard flips this so the highest/best in us sees the highest/best in the other and that is a completely different relationship, it orients to compassion and understanding rather than division and animosity. And "spiritually" speaking, it orients us to that which is open, whole, clear and loving instead of the conceptual problem maker. A very powerful orientation corrector!
Cheers guys. One thing I find about most teachers and teachings, who have a certain flexibility, is how these teachings are communicated. I fear that most teachers mistake their ‘new age/buddnist/mystical bubble, as being bigger and more effective than it really is . This is not a criticism. It’s just I know many folk who are soooo close to waking up but are not fortunate enough to have a more robust and out of the box catalyst for awakening to the reality of what is and often get tripped up by the well meaning but flawed unicorns in space’ approach to enlightenment. Of course, I know that I don’t know and ‘reality’ is nothing to worry about or something that simply needs a ‘broader technique’?! 😊 Why, despite my realisation that ‘I am not’ do I still feel a leaning towards communicating (to those who see the flaws in our current linguistic limitations?) Great talk either way. XX
