11. Don't stalk your ex's social media! 

You make me feel so normal. No contact is the hardest thing to do. Stalking on fb is something that i subconsciously do and it makes me so sad.

Not only did I stop posting on social media, i deactivated all of them entirely and it greatly changed my life for the better 🙂 Its so empowering to no longer seek digital validation and makes it a lot easier to get into other activities I never made time for before. I would highly recommend for everyone to consider leaving social media altogether; the water is nice here 😊

That is exactly what I do, I see all the time if he is online or not. If he is online, my head say he is talking to an other woman, if he is of line, I concluded that he closed his phone cause he is with an other. These thought drive me crazy! So, I decide to not going to Facebook to get out from their ! Sorry for my English lol

I don't care she can stalk all she want it's her that made that decision 😂😂 😂 you see that I grew up to be a real man god bless you to

Yes Rory! I'm counting all the days I'm working out, the days my mental health is getting heal... I'm counting the days I'm increasing my push ups and not counting the days I'm in NC, it's helping tremendously. I stopped stalking his social media and I Uninstalled IG, messenger and my friends FB. Because I'm starting to love and value myself finally and I don't want to hurt myself like I used to do it before... thank you Rory!!

I learned the hard way that if you unblock someone, then you have to wait forty-eight hours to block them again...

It's interesting whenever I am needing something to hear, I stumble on what I need .. I so needed to hear this, in the way you described it.. I am here in my journey of healing from a 2 year relationship, where we lived together .. Thank You !

What if you unfollowed because it hurts you to see their new relationship and to prevent stalking? I felt that was the best thing to do to mentally and emotionally detach myself and heal

If she came back and had slept with someone else before she did, what then? Isn’t that my business? I know she’s rebounding right now but I also know that personally for me if she came back after sleeping with someone else that means she loved me while sleeping with them and that’s cheating in my eyes.

What if she is stalking mines even two weeks after she played me ? We don’t follow each other but she always watching my story and knows I’m dating someone.

I don’t have time to stalk nobody’s social media. I went straight and block him same day he dumped me

Rory. I deleted my ex after the breakup on all social media for me JUST for me, so i could be able to move on with my life. But right after i deleted i got a message telling me how cold and stupid i was and then i got blocked. This action really affected my healing process because i didn't get the "end" i wanted. Any suggestions on what i should do? should i just ignore it or contact again somehow?

I ask her to block me from everywhere because if I keep her in my Social media I know I would talk with her ,she did blocked me and now waiting for her to text me. Is there any hope she will reach out again

My ex recently deleted me off social media after almost 5 months of the break up. I really don’t understand the theory behind this. I did not delete or block as I wanted to keep the lines of communication open should they want to speak again. Is this a sign that they are definitely over the relationship, if they have deleted me months after it has ended?

Too late. I already blocked his number and he knows it but it’s not really blocked lol. I never heard back from him 🤦🏻‍♀️ Don't be like me. I'm happy now, though. I've moved on. But sometimes, I miss him and wants him back. Idk anymore 🙆‍♀️🏻

So if you blocked them, should you unblock them? Wouldn't that make you appear like you're like weak if they noticed that you've unblocked them?

What if he blocked me, and we had a great relationship, not a bad break up at all, he decided to block me one day, but didn't block me on txt and calls. He left a coworker of mine on fb but deleted all my other friends, he knows I can see his fb through her fb. I'm so hurt I don't get it! I've been blocked over a week now and been in no contact! Well started no contact again after I txt him about blocking me how hurt I was! Ugh he's been doing confusing things since the break up, he's confused so I am too

What’s the protocol with photos on social media? In NC. I still have mine up, my ex still has hers when I checked. If I take them down will it look a bit like a manipulation, a dig? Alternatively I don’t want them up for such a long time my ex think I’m not moving on

What if he dumped me and blocked me in all forms of social medias/phone number?

why, after 9 months post break up and totally out of the blue did she block my Instagram? Mind you, she already unfollowed it right after the breakup and we're still friends on Facebook... makes no sense.

I had to block him and even his friends because he kept appearing it's like they are purposely hurting me. It's not like knows I blocked him, he probably doesn't give a shit. I'm hurting while he's really happy. I just can't. He initiated the break up.

What percentage of ex's do you think "stalk" or "check" their partners social media and how often? I wonder if there are any studies.

Is it too late if I blocked them then unblocked them. I couldn’t bare seeing her on my timeline.

I blocked my x months ago i would rather not see what's going on with her but if she wants to call or text thats her option her son unfriended me while back and never spoke to me since i respected him he knows i respected hes mother i say it must be a sign of never again i dont know.

I have been doing no contact for the last couple of weeks, but I have been stalking and recently stopped, what do I do once I have not contacted her for a while, I deleted all my social medias and our only source of contact now is through my phone number/texting; however, I dont know if she has my number blocked, if she does then there is no way that we could get back in contact so what should I do? make a social media and hope she sees it there? or contact her once I am in a better place

But he blocks..bed I keep asking his new girl..why he blocked me?

Oops. Already blocked them lol

So i shouldn't like her profile pics?

My ex broke up with my about two weeks ago. She’s been posting on her storyyy soo much and I always see new people she follows and I know I shouldn’t . Iv put her on mute . She still looks at all my stories and she still has our pictures on her ig and it still says we are dating on Facebook so I’m just confused . Why would she keep pictures of us still together , kissing etc and have us still dating . I get it might not be a priority but it makes no sense to me and I feel like I’m driving myself crazy

It's so hard not to check their social media and it truly becomes a habit. You do it once, see no one liked her newest photos you feel good, but then you start coming back to see who else liked, and everyone seems suspicious, you start thinking they are seeing someone else. When you stalk them you feel relieve for a couple minutes, but then anxiety comes back and you want to do it again and again, if you dont check you still feel anxious, hope this feeling goes away soon.

Dont waste time on social media, live your life! Have fun! Meet new people!! Real life is much more exciting than cyber life!!!

Watching this rn bcs I can't stop stalking my ex. :/

Social media doesnt mean anything to me... i blocked her and disable my fb account for her to really have my total absence...she has my phone and wassap...so if she wants to reach out she can... but i really dont believe in social media crap...it doesnt help in anything im working on myself and distracting from this nightmare...

Don't do this. For god's sake, DO NOT do this. It will set you back. It will make you feel awful and worse. I am kicking myself. She's having a great time travelling while I'm stuck at home, going to work every day. Listen to Rory.

My ex dumped me. Blocked me on IG stories. I guess he muted my account. But then I saw his friends who doesn’t follow me seeing my stories 🙄. I don’t understand. You don’t wanted me in your life and you’re probably sending your friends to check on me? I was sad at the beginning now I’m starting to think that I had so many possibilities out there that I didn’t see before. I have to admit this breakup affected my confidence and self-esteem but watching these videos I’ve doing better. Thank you so much 🙏

I needed to watch this again. It's good to know I'm not alone.

It sucks. We want to be someone who clearly doesn’t want to be with us. We make stories in our minds saying maybe if this happens or if that happens or if anything happens we will still have a chance again. But all of this is so destructive. Accepting it is hard like really hard but you gotta do it for you. You don’t deserve being with someone who rejected you even once. Let them go

I challenged myself to two weeks of no social media. I’m currently on a week of no social media and it feels great, but not going to lie I miss it. I know two weeks isn’t a lot of time, but I’ve never taken more than 2 days away from social media since the days of MySpace 😂.

I unfollowed/unfriended them but did not block them. I don't want to see their posts, don't want any reminders of them as I grow and work on myself. It's not to be mean or get back at them, it's for me!

Thank you once again for your videos. I actually blocked him from Instagram because I post everyday on my beauty page. I did not want to leave aside what I like to do most because of him, but at the same time I don't think he deserves seeing anything I do. He changed his phone number so I am calm with the decision of blocking him. I tried to tell him how I was doing through DM but he ignored my messages. If he ever wants to know how I am he knows my number which is still the same.

I unfollowed my ex and removed them from my following. My reasoning is that I was still checking any story I posted on Insta to see if she had viewed it. This was very harmful because day after day she viewed and viewed and it made me anxious that she was just indifferent to me. It also gave me access to seeing her Insta stories (I muted her posts and stories but could still see them via her listing on my story viewers and I had such a hard time resisting.) So I unfollowed and haven’t checked her stuff since, she hasn’t checked mine but at least I know if she does then she made the effort to come to my page and do so. Who knows.

This helped me so much! My ex blocked me for 2 months, but unblocked me last week and since then I can‘t stop stalking them, and I hate it. I even feel like he wants to hurt me, because since he unblocked me he started to post pictures with other girls. I wish he never unblocked me. I just feel so devastated, he seems like he does not care about me anymore. Really thank you so much!! I am going to watch this video more than one time!

So glad i found you 🙂 I only listen to you and the dating guy ! Thanks so much for all your videos x

I was so hurt and upset at the start of the break up I unfriended my ex on Facebook, after pleading my ex said getting back together will put a lot of pressure on us both, now 1 month of no contact I am slowly healing and I want to friend him again, should I or not? We were in a long distance relationship, only 50 miles apart, but we parted ways on good terms, would I look stupid to request a friend? Already embarrassed myself enough. Any advice? X

Can you do a video on if they broke up with you and unfriended you immediately?

I try to not stalk her on Instagram but I still get the anxiety at times as if something's wrong and I end up looking up at her profile. I don't follow her and her profile is private but whenever I get a feeling a new post is added to her profile and I'm like wondering and sad what's the new post about ☹️ It's hard to move on as well. No girl's been so attractive to me emotionally and I end up making them friends and not a potential partner 😩

Asking "what am I hoping I'll find?" Is very helpful. Because you want a photo of them being sad right? I know thats what I wanted. Logically, that is never gonna happen. Social media is a highlight reel. What your looking for isnt there. Will you feel better? You know you wont. Put it down, go outside, read a book. Like any bad habit, I find just asking what my intention is helps to stop me from doing it

PEOPLE LISTEN UP! Social media allows you to MUTE THEM NOW! Mute!! It saves my ass from seeing my ex’s posts. It’s like blocking, without the blocking 😌

I have a question. You said “blocking your ex on social media is showing that you don’t want any more contact with them” however in other videos you said it means that being blocked means they just don’t want to be pestered/seeing your stuff/ etc. So which one is it? He blocked me, I didn’t do anything to him. I’m finally getting over it, I just distract myself with everything else in my life. It’s just tough because he lives in my street. And shops at the same grocery store I do. So I started shopping elsewhere, but I occasionally see him jogging outside or driving by. I’m the one being avoidant now because I don’t want anything to do with them anymore. But I haven’t blocked them. In fact, I want them to see how better off I am. I started my second business, I’m graduating college, I am moving soon! He walked away so easily and I do agree with your videos that some people do regret it or go through some stuff. But he is a prideful person and he would rather rip his balls off than admitting he was wrong. Anyway, I love your videos and your voice is soothing hahha

What if i blocked them? Can i unblock them now?! She still stalking me from fake account, even when she’s in a relationship Thank you rory, and hope you answer my question.

It's so true I've been looking to see when my ex has been on whatsapp she was always in bed early so when I see it's like last seen 10 11 at night my anxiety goes mad but could be anyone and I look on Facebook and her tiktok etc to see who she follows its like my little addiction at the minute can't wait to look until one day I look and see something I don't like and go back to square one on my path to healing

What if I will just deactivate my account?

Love chat should I stop posting positive snaps on my Snapchat story? My ex is currently in the relief stage but she ALWAYS checks my story. It's a tough question I've been having trouble with. P.S. it's only been around a week since the break up.... And holy shit, I've recovered so quickly it's almost as if I'm superhuman😦😦😦

Thanks for this video - it's my ex's birthday today and I've been waiting for this day since things ended in early March. We've had surface contact since then (a couple of texts and brief Twitter exchanges, 99% initiated by him). We were friends for 11 years, so normally I'd be inclined to reach out and say "happy birthday" via text (he did so for mine in January). But what happened with the break up was so underhanded, thoughtless, and hurtful. So part of me is hoping that he posts on Twitter that it's his birthday so that I can just "like" it and move on, lol. Either way, because we've been somewhat friendly, I feel that this is the last day I actually owe him anything, and things will really change on my end. As much as it still hurts, I'm really looking forward to a new chapter.

I unfollowed on FB, but I didn't unfriend him. And I've been very good at resisting looking at his page. It's so tempting to make sure they're not with someone else and to see if the pics of you are still on their profile. But the temporary relief means nothing. I don't want to see his face. Not yet.

What if I blocked her first? I didnt want to see anything she posted and I only blocked her just on facebook...but then the next day I came to find out she blocked me on facebook and also instagram and snapchat..saying she doesnt want to see what Im doing and I dont need to see what shes doing. YET she said shes doing nothing with my number... what the fuck kind of game is that? Does that mean she’ll reach out? Or does it mean nothing?

Why do dumpers always have to be the bad guys? I feel like a lot of dumpees don’t want to recognize the part they played in the falling out. Like, any kind of relationship takes maintenance, and some of these dumpees, they’re complacent and make no effort or try. It should always be a 2 way street.

After 2 weeks of no contact, I literally couldn't stop myself from looking at his fb profile bc I was hurting so bad. I knew I wasn't able to stop looking at his page. So, I sent him a brief private message telling him that for me to move on in a healthy way, I would need to unfriend him on fb bc I couldn't keep seeing him in front of me every day. I told him I didn't want to unfriend him bc I still still care about him...But I need to, to move on. He sent me back a message that was kind and told me I'm wonderful and if I ever need anything that he's there for me. I sent him that message bc I didn't want to just unfriend him and come across as petty. Since then, it has been another 3 weeks of no contact (5 weeks all together since he wanted to be just friends... which I told him I couldn't do). I wish I was stronger and was able to just keep him as my fb friend. But I wasn't able and I had to prioritize my own mental health at that point. Is there still a chance he will contact me if I stay in no contact, even though I'm not friends with him on fb anymore? Or did that ruin everything? Thanks.

Not sure if true but no contact 7 months and is it true if they still follow you on pintrest and Instagram but unfriend you Facebook that keeping those doors open means she still wants access and me in her life in a certain way? She would not hesitate to block anyone ever or any ex some I’m just curious.

I'm glad to have found this I don't stalk his Instagram since that's the only social media I have him on there and his number and her been liking every post but then I think about and I try to think otherwise but I don't post so much as I have before after the breakup I've been focusing on myself and post once a week but nothing crazy just showing how I'm glowing but again I try not to think about it because he also has a girlfriend

I stopped looking at her social media after finding out she was with someone else (alight monkey branch) however I gave in earlier and looked at hers after a week or two without. Such a bad decision just made me feel worse. I’m not sure if I should unblock her though ?

Nearly 2 months in, god bless you Rory think I’d have a meltdown without you

False. I'm blocking... Deleting....Unfriending .... Unfollowing.... no contacting... new phone numbering...🙋🏻 Can I get it in a combo deal and go large with it? cause I want everything boo.💁🏻

yep...unfollowed on facebook.... does feel like relief...didnt unfriend or block... didnt want to send that message..... Went NC for like 12 weeks now

what if they break up with you & stalk you

My ex said let's be friends. I was for 1 month. But then she started talking ti new people and kept reminding me that we are not getting back together. And all the time she kept saying that 'it's not you its me' But I was hurting myself in that period, so I started no contact. I told her I can't be your friend. She blocked me from everywhere. Now she is posting bad things about me on her instagram stories. I didn't react, but I don't understand what am I supposed to do. Should I keep doing no contact or msg them and ask them what all of this is about ?

7:00 Well she actually liked another guy for a long time and I was kinda the guy she was with so she can forget about it. All of that in 6 months of relationship + an extra 7 months of friendship (before that, obviously) Sooo yea, how I take it, is that "If you don't like the way I changed, then fuck off" It hurts but I must do it, and for me it's definitely way more important to be myself. More than anything else.

I deleted my fb and messanger. Eventhough she still has my phone number.. currently doing my own thing work and school.. What does it mean when she txt mad or frustrated. Thank you for your video it has helped me

After I got dumped by my ex-girlfiend, I blocked her number and her Facebook page. Including, her family members.

What if the ex is stalking you while she’s in a relationship ?

The way I look at it is like this. When you're assessing what your ex is posting, are they posting on social media in ways that are not normal? I.E, are they posting a lot more than they usually do?... Also, are they posting on social media that they know you can see, or both, social media you can see, and social media that you can't. Because if they're only posting on social media that you can see, and they don't seem to be very active on social media they don't have you on, there's probably a good chance they're posting literally for you. Whether it be to make you jealous, make you wonder, make you wanna reach out in some neurotic state. etc. I have a girl I was dating on snapchat (only snapchat) and since we've been in no contact for 3 weeks, she's posted more snapchat stories in these 3 weeks than she has the entire Ive known her, yet, doesn't seem to be posting any new pictures on any other social media, and we don't follow each other on anything else. Coincidence? Fuck no lmao

I unfriended her after a month. The. She breadcrumbs and I ended up blocked her on Facebook because I couldn’t stop looking at her page. I left her open on snap she looks at every story even tho I don’t look at hers(easier to avoid snap because they’ll know if you look. But ever since I blocked a month ago she has not reached out and she ignored me a few weeks ago when I saw her in public. So I wouldn’t recommend blocking either just delete the app. I probably f ed up and I guess I just gotta deal with it.

What if you've become more active on social media? For me, it wasn't to get back at her and show off, but because I started to make new friends after the breakup and we tag/comment on things all the time. Even on platforms like Instagram I have started posting more because I have more things to post about. I barely posted in the relationship. Could she take these things the wrong way?

Yup I avoid it at all cost but its annoying when close mutual friends/families of his contact me 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️ like stop

1 week after the breakup and my ex is going on a trip. It broke my heart when I found out. I’m waiting for the time I don’t miss him anymore. Waiting for the time he becomes a stranger to me. Part of me wanted to see him suffer as much as I do.

I got a question for you maybe you can make a video Did i lose her/him forever? I mean to the point that it's impossible for us to be in a relationship again

my ex is stalking me on discord and ive told her countless times to stop. im gonna send this to her so she hopefully stops

Hello I unfollow my ex on facebook and instagram and I stop messaging her coz thats what she want...but she keep on asking my sister about me about my status on facebook or even personal question..why she need to do that? But she dont like me anymore😢😢 whats that mean??? Thank you sir rory!!

What if your x blocks you off of FB a month after break up.

Your turning into my therapist🙏

Great video. I would like ask something relative. She broke up with me recently however we follow each other on instagram. Let's suppose that i don't want to take some time off the social media and i have one of our photo in my profile. Should i delete the photo considering that i am planning to do "no contact" properly and also win my ex back later?

i agree with rory for the most part, but sorry no i dont think it was caused at all by me not being authetic. i was always the same. all of a sudden he just acts cold, says he has "lost himself" and he wants a breakup...even though i was an amazing supporting partner for 4 years. and long distance for a long time so wasnt even smothering him...hes just selfish.

Man I’ve been watching her IG stories with my low key account. We broke up at the end of 2019 and I still find myself watching her shit. Funny thing is, I see her face now and I don’t feel attracted to her anymore but I can’t figure out why I keep watching it.

I'm in a group chat with all my friends and my ex is in it, shall I not speak in there or is it acceptable to speak in there as long as its not directly to them?

I didn’t see this video before I did this. I blocked her on IG and Facebook to not obsess over her social media and then realized I shouldn’t. Then unblocked. Then the same day, she ended up blocking me. Did I screw myself?

Do you think i follow my ex on linkedin but before when we fight she told me i will give your details to embassy so that you will not enter in my country? Is this possible that somebody can give information to embassy authorities so that you will not be able to enter in her country?

I didn't block my ex, I just unfriended her. Bad idea?

Too late I think I fked up man I unfollowed her private insta and public and unfriended her snap and unfriend on fb she’s not blocked I just unfollowed her cause I couldn’t control myself I kept looking at her stuff even when I muted her but I still found it hard so when i did that it’s been easier I’m in week 1 I ain’t even search her up once I find it made it waaay easier also on the last day we talked I called her twice she said don’t call me but txt so from that ik I’m still in her contacts so if she wants she can call me or txt directly I’m working on myself but I’m down on flu I have watched all your vids and I’m finding peace in myself I hope the unfriending and unfollowing is justified please get back to me

I only unfollowed her on all social media after she dumped me.. than a day later she unfollowed me (it’s ok for me) but what I didn’t understand is that another day later she blocked me?? The brake up was no drama, she dumped me over what’s app voicemail and her behavior was like she is the victim.. no begging writing calling or what ever I just don’t understand her.. sometimes I don’t get it how a mature person with 32 years is behaving like this..

I think I did a whoopsie. I deleted her because I couldn't help my self from stalking, next day she blocked me withouth a word, now what chief?

I have wasted a lot of time stalking my ex on social media and to be honest the urge to stalk them is so so so powerful that my mind immediately takes over and i can't stop it

Rory you’re not making sense isn’t the goal of no contact is focusing on “me”if they’re like around then that would distract us why not just block at least on Snapchat? And leave whatsapp unblocked ?

This video is really helpful after listening to it. It made me prevent myself from stalking him.

We were not Facebook friends. But on messenger. I couldn't take it anymore. I blocked him. So he won't think im spying on him. That irritates him.he left because of third party. He lied about it and i caught it. I love him and miss him but hey gotta work on me. And if i was being cheated on who wants sloppy seconds. Good bye

She blocked me on Facebook and Instagram so idgaf, I have a fake account and I want to stalk her but I can't

I unfriended her On Fb right when she broke up with me. I told her I am sorry I cannot be your friend I have plenty of friends. You are my lover not my friend. I did not block her so she still could message me on messenger if she wanted to. I’ve learned from my past to do no contact. If you sit message them too much they will just block you. That’s why NC is important and she still has the option to reach out. Also it helps me because then I won’t stock her page either because I’m not her friend on FB

Anything that you would recommend in this pandemic setting, because all my work revolves around social media right now and its difficult to go out and do something else :(

my ex posted picture with his new gf...

I didn't unfollow/blocked him. He then unfollowed me then blocked and unblocked me on Instagram. So now we both not following each other. He then made his account public so I can't help but check it out so should I block him to prevent myself checking his page out?

I can't look at my ex's social media. It would tear me apart. However, I never blocked her. I know she still looks at my Instagram but I don't look at hers.