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13 Harsh Truths About Men That Women Learn Too Late

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In this video, I'm going to discuss 13 harsh truths about men that women often learn too late. Understanding these realities can save you from a lot of disappointment, confusion, and heartbreak. If you're tired of experiencing the same issues in relationships, then you need to hear this.
CHAPTERS
00:00 Harsh Truth About Men 01
00:52 Harsh Truth About Men 02
01:57 Harsh Truth About Men 03
02:39 Harsh Truth About Men 04
03:22 Harsh Truth About Men 05
04:12 Harsh Truth About Men 06
04:54 Harsh Truth About Men 07
05:40 Harsh Truth About Men 08
06:15 Harsh Truth About Men 09
06:51 Harsh Truth About Men 10
07:31 Harsh Truth About Men 11
08:15 Harsh Truth About Men 12
08:50 Harsh Truth About Men 13
09:28 Closing
01. Men treat you based on their perception of your worth. If they see you as valuable, they'll be dedicated.
02. Don't expect unconditional love. Relationships thrive on mutual support and effort.
03. Insecure men can be destructive. They may try to dim your light and isolate you.
04. Transformation after wealth can be risky. As men achieve success, their priorities might shift.
05. Cheating often comes with lies and denial. Men rarely admit to infidelity readily.
06. Being nice isn't usually a top quality men seek.
07. Great guy is not a Great husband. Compatibility and commitment are crucial for a successful marriage.
08. A man without direction struggles to commit to you. Find someone passionate about their goals.
09. Beware the "chaser." Secure men express interest, not play games.
10. Your past relationships may be judged. Be honest, but avoid unnecessary details.
11. Men can move on quickly. Unlike women, their goodbyes might be abrupt.
12. X-rated content can distort expectations. It creates unrealistic beauty standards.
13. Men value freedom highly. Respect their need for independence, but ensure they choose you freely.
======================================
Ismael Gomez III
I'm a Cuban - American Relationship Coach, Author, and Speaker.
FOLLOW ME
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If you're looking for a Private Consultation:
savethemesseng...
======================================
Disclaimer:
We do not accept any liability for any loss or damage incurred from you acting or not acting as a result of reading any of our publications. You acknowledge that you use the information we provide at your own risk. Do your own research.
© Save The Messenger
#relationshipadvice #relationshipcoach #relationshiptips
KEYWORDS
truths about men, dating advice for women, relationship advice for women, men psychology, relationship advice, dating coach, dating advice, what men want, boys psychology, men psychology in love, male psychology, psychology of men, man psychology in love, relationships, love advice, relationship coach for women, cracking the man code, crack the man code, break the man code, breaking the man code, love coach for women, dating tips, relationship expert, how men think,

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17 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 1,1 тыс.

@SaveTheMessenger 21 день назад

Please support our RU-vid channel by Subscribing - ru-vid.com It means a lot to me to see you want to learn about these topics.

@Vibeshai 17 дней назад

LISTEN I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU.. I GOT A RELATIONSHIP FOR JUST A MONTH AND HE DID CONTACTED WITH ME PHYSICALLY..AND THEN HE JUST RANDOMLY ENGAGED WITH ANOTHER WOMEN AND START LIVE IN WITH HER.. WTF.. I CAN'T EVEN TELL ABOUT IT TO MY PARENTS AS HE KNEW IT AND HE GOT A WOMEN WHO IS A CABIN CREW AND HAVE A BUNCH OF MONEY..I AM NOW DESTROYED.. WAS THAT A S**XUAL HARR*SMENT?

@sandythao7933 Месяц назад

Only give to a man as much as he gives to you and pay attention to his actions, NOT HIS WORDS! Seriously!

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

I prefer words and actions to align

@platin2812 Месяц назад

Yes. I had to learn the hard way to take this lesson.

@LadyParisien Месяц назад

I appreciate you all mentioning this. I've been learning this the hard way after 10+ years of marriage. Recently been telling my husband when he says something "what are you going to do about it?" Sounds so harsh to me personally but it's something he responds to well and it kind of pushes him in the direction to actually make changes. I would not personally recommend that style for others but we've gone through a lot and overcome a lot. I wish so much that I knew then what I know now. I especially appreciated the beginning of his message. Ladies - take what he saya seriously! You will save yourself so much heartache and confusion. My husband and I have overcome a lot but we chose a different path than we were told to choose. It was difficult and not something I would recommend to others. I'd like to add along with what he said about being driven: how does he handle hardship and challenges? Does he show signs of anger? Anxiety? Does he keep his head about him and seek wide counsel? Does he make wise choices? Ask for your advice? If he loses his mind over what you think is ridiculous, he WILL do this in your relationship. If he doesn't ask for your thoughts and opinions especially if it's something that relates to you or affects, he WON'T ask for your thoughts later on. He WILL make the decision without you.

@ElizzzaB Месяц назад

So true.

@SchöneNeueWelt Месяц назад

Exactly, i am 48, and this is true

@user-wh9sv7nd2y Месяц назад

As a nurse, I have seen husbands and wives come in the morning and stay until late, every day to be at their spouse's bedside. And, these are clients who are hospitalized for months in the ICU. This is my witnessing of unconditional love.

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

I have witnessed that as well from people close to me. Genuine and true love is real. It’s like losing a best friend. But if that person started treating you poorly and ignored your needs, I bet your feelings for them would eventually change. But if your son/daughter did the same, you’d still love them unconditionally.

@zathenhcambidestem-iliv2464 Месяц назад

We are more than our lower selves. There is greatness within us, every challenge asks us to reach in for the gold.

@joanneblack7697 Месяц назад

I have witnessed this in Hospitals as well. How true. There is a maturity about people like this. Not an age maturity, but an emotional maturity.

@joanneblack7697 Месяц назад

@SaveTheMessenger You made me laugh in a good way. Unconditional love is for kids, parents and dogs. 😂 (Let's not forget cats, horses, goats ... 😊). It's "funny" because it's true.

@UterineBlackmail Месяц назад

You missed the point, my dear nurse. Just because they come to visit them, it doesn’t mean it’s true love. You’re too naïve and brainwashed

@jilladams7573 25 дней назад

'A man will treat you according to the value he sees in you...AND to the value he sees in himself.'

@SaveTheMessenger 18 дней назад

You've got it.

@omotayosatuyi252 14 дней назад

None of that is true sure some guys might think that but most guys don't have that belief

@kristenk708 14 дней назад

What do you mean?@@omotayosatuyi252

@omotayosatuyi252 14 дней назад

@@kristenk708 I'm saying that guys aren't just one way

@justicevibes1252 Месяц назад

I stopped caring when he said, "I'll eventually commit to you." What a joke. I knew right then and there that he was not the one for me. I wasted years on that man. Never again.

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

Any guy who acts like he thinks he can put me on " hold for later" is deluding himself..

@justicevibes1252 Месяц назад

@@UnashamedCaliforniagirl I agree. 💯 You deserve better than that!

@francesdonald8743 Месяц назад

WOW. Just. Wow. Good on you for leaving at that point. At least you weren't co-dependent! I think we all come to our senses at some point. The personal growth journey is the most important one. When we make ourselves a priority (without being narcissistic about it) we scare off the weak, and attract the like-minded.

@LittleBambi777 Месяц назад

Researchers found that men need about 6 months to know if they want to marry someone, so if he is not sure after a long time, you are a placeholder, and that has nothing to do with your worth, he's just not the one.

@justicevibes1252 Месяц назад

@@LittleBambi777 Agreed 💯.

@shreebrnwl 25 дней назад

1. A man will treat you according to the value he sees in you. 2. He won't love you unconditionally. 3. Insecure man will destroy you. 4. Transformation after wealth. 5. Will lie about cheating. 6. He doesn't care about you being nice. 7. Great guy doesn't equal great husband. 8. When he has no direction in life. 9. Watch out for the chasers. 10. Will judge your body count. 11. Will replace you instantly. 12. Brainwashed by X-rated content. 13. They value freedom.

@d-0v0-b 23 дня назад

Happened with me ...broke up and ...I hate to say that I'm crying. I just wanna move on Quicker like he did with another Girl ... I wanna be Richer than him . He thinks he got money and I was only with him for money ... He wanted ONLY $exz from me And today he said clearly for him it's only $ex which means love for him ......for the sake of Self respect I have to leave the Relationship 😔. Idk but it was too much toxic for me ... I hate to say this that I loved him.... I just wanna Freaking move on Quike Nothing is more important then Family, SELF RESPECT ,INNER PEACE ✌🏻 and SELF LOVE ! Edit: I never did $ez with him , when he literally ask for it , I instantly rejected !

@Maoma-mp4sp 23 дня назад

RUN!

@jojos9788 23 дня назад

@@d-0v0-b f around and find out. May Allah give you hidaya 😑

@d-0v0-b 23 дня назад

@@jojos9788 Ameen 💗🫂 Alhamdulillah, I'm better than ever , and I have to be . For the sake of Allah ... I seriously never wanna be in these anymore ❌

@themobilemage2137 22 дня назад

Well I'm glad I'm single then!

@witchbetelgeuse 20 дней назад

God bless this man for warning women about man despite being a man.

@In_My_Ambivert_Era_I_Guess 23 часа назад

He is truly is a women saver.

@katev3832 28 дней назад

3. Insecure men will destroy you Hindsight is 20/20. I experienced this more than once, unfortunately

@vionathalitasalsabila6832 22 дня назад

Stay strong gurl. Don't let him ruin your precious life

@sarahicarranza3462 21 день назад

This Is so true!! Stau away Front insecure Guys.

@chatsu5441 17 дней назад

This type try to pull energy from others to make them richer, more power ... run

@Rebel1990V 12 дней назад

My partner wanted my sexy curves to go away by making to put on weight, so that no other man would look at me. He used to tell me that it was my USP, ultimate selling point.

@jennalavena Месяц назад

Another thing i’d like to say is guys will even commit to you just because they want your body. dont give it to them & see how they react

@trishahalder4375 Месяц назад

I agree! 💯

@priyankarmajumder4152 27 дней назад

You mean weaponizing intimacy as a manipulative woman? But that's abuse.

@LoveLife-oo9cz 27 дней назад

@@priyankarmajumder4152How about you need to stop manipulating women about their personal lifestyles? Ever heard no marriage no ses?

@pumptds 26 дней назад

What are we committing to then. Your bitchy attitude??

@oilcubebottle6389 25 дней назад

@@priyankarmajumder4152 men being entitled to women's bodies and pressuring them into "intimacy" is called cohesion. That's abuse and that can lead to rape

@bestrong-bm9uj 10 дней назад

My heart hurts so much when I watched it. I made a huge mistake in my very early twenties, went dating too soon and settled too early and married a narcissist after 20 years. I've got noone to blame but myself and I wish I learned everything from your video before I got married. All I ever wanted was a husband that loves me. He never looked me the same as soon as he started earning his 6-figure sum salary and saw me as a burden and that he was better than me because he was the breadwinner. It still hurts so much to this date after I filed for the divorce because all I ever wanted was for my husband to reciprocate the love and action I gave him :(

@aashikumare7990 8 дней назад

I am 19, in my eyes You are one of the strongest women ❤️ I appreciate your life 🫂 Love from India 💓

@bestrong-bm9uj 7 дней назад

@@aashikumare7990 Thank you so much. It has brought tears to my eyes seeing your beautiful message because it has meant alot to me. You are such a beautiful and kind person. 💞

@thunder.gun.cheese Час назад

So sad to hear, I hope you find love and peace

@dreckigerdan8244 26 дней назад

I am a 27 year old woman and never was in a relationship. Thanks for the advice. A lot of it is in allignment with my own observations about men in relationships. But watching this video feels like that it's not worth it having a partner 😕😅

@letstrytogetbetterokay8516 23 дня назад

I'm a 27 year old woman too and never had a relationship. By the amount of pain I see my female friends in their relationships (not always the guys fault, sometimes my girlies are the red flags or both are red flags) ... it's exhausting to watch. I doubt I'd ever be able to put up with so much bs. I like my alone time but I dream of being in a happy relationship. The reality though is scary.

@ayushiyadav1 22 дня назад

@@letstrytogetbetterokay8516 that's true

@vionathalitasalsabila6832 22 дня назад

It's okay, better live a happy life than suffering with a wrong man

@farzanahaquesnigdha8667 20 дней назад

@@letstrytogetbetterokay8516The reality is you must go through painful experiences in a relationship and you better be prepared. Never imagine e happily ever after. That thing doesn’t exist. And with those pains, you have to continue and if you both can fight those pains together and stick to it, that's real love. But never let it be onesided and never leave the side of logic and your selfrespect. Protect your rights and also his. Don't do any odd by yourself and if he is not doing that too with you, then he is not your cup of tea

@priskruger314 19 дней назад

@@farzanahaquesnigdha8667no there shouldn't be pain. If both have humility life will b good n peaceful. Considering most people dont have humility (incl myself) this causes drama.

@happygolucky9004 Месяц назад

About truth #1. So basically I think it says a lot about men's character if they only treat you well if they like you. How about treat someone with respect because it's the decent thing to do 😐

@joanneblack7697 Месяц назад

Yup. Like Ismael says, his own intentions are not clear to himself. This sounds like immaturity. Also, just because someone treats you and others with decency ... it does not necessarily mean he loves you.

@realheckertrustmebro Месяц назад

So you're basically asking for fake love? Would you want your man to treat all women equally even though he says he loves you the most? wtf

@happygolucky9004 Месяц назад

@@realheckertrustmebro Who's talking about love? I think doing what you say you are going to do is called integrity. It's not love to be a decent human being. Treating someone well should just be how you treat people.

@realheckertrustmebro Месяц назад

@@happygolucky9004 agreed. i'm sry, i misunderstood.

@happygolucky9004 Месяц назад

@@realheckertrustmebro No worries, glad we are on the same page. Thank you for asking a question 😊

@janewasson4845 Месяц назад

Remember, too, that men don't "love" the same way women do, and do NOT become a broke, trapped housewife and servant. You may be devoted, trust him, be giddy, expect a beautiful home, babies, family holidays, etc, but once you're seen nude, won and slept with for awhile, the man feels trapped, bored, resentful, and starts blaming the woman. He may slack off on chores, helping with the kids, be gone all day playing golf, shut up playing video games, or glued to football games, cheat because "he works all week." There are 1000 excuses, and you're a nagging B. And in the marriage alone. Ladies, l can't stress this enough: get educated, have a career, not a mere job, and set up a bank account that your husband NEVER knows about. Keep your mouth SHUT. If things go bad, you'll have a bed, roof, food, gas, and protection for your kids. Not every Mommy and Daddy will take you in, and pay your bills. And they already raised their family, and likely want to enjoy life, save for retirement, travel, and have peace. Not a sad daughter, a bunch of screaming kids and added expense. It's not fair to them, either. So! Have that secret bank account, SHUTUP about it, DON'T tell anyone, and add to the "run fund" on a regular basis. Even if you don't use it, you'll have nice savings for your retirement years. If your husband is still alive, SHUTUP about it. In the case of your ill health, put it in a specific trust (before you get ill) and have your bank pay your bills for you. And legal directives to keep THEIR mouths shut. Good luck out there!'

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Great insights. Thanks for taking the time to write about your experience. I hope others here get to read it.

@teresarhodes3845 Месяц назад

My husband told me more than once that "I didn't have to work". I knew differently. Working outside the home, and helping with household expenses was valuable in many ways. Now that he has passed, and I am retired the decisions I made years ago were proven correct. As Tina Turner would sing, "What's Love Got to Do With It?"

@janewasson4845 Месяц назад

And, not only do you contribute something, but you have self respect, and are treated more as a valued equal. No man wants to come home to a resentful wife, or one who can only talk about soap operas, the kids, Hollywood gossip, or what's up with Mama. Ugh!

@janewasson4845 Месяц назад

@@SaveTheMessengerExperience? Not personally. My hubs and l just celebrated our 50 year anniversary. It's more a conclusion from what I' ve heard professionally over time. Love your channel, and solid advice!

@user-mu6wn7cv3m Месяц назад

Best advice ever. ❤ The "run fund" advice is genius, necessary and solid. It's also a good idea for financial reasons. You never ever know what can happen in life. Illness and death can happen to a spouse. My mother was widowed and left with 2 children to raise 10 and 12.

@bluliite Месяц назад

If there is no real love, there is no point.

@zathenhcambidestem-iliv2464 Месяц назад

There is true love, we can remeber it inside our souls. We know!

@aprils.r8418 Месяц назад

Luckily we don't have to rely on men for finances anymore

@cynthiaschell7246 Месяц назад

@@zathenhcambidestem-iliv2464 Yes, we know and we are willing to wait for it, not chase it, unlike men who will saddle up and settle down with whomever and whatever they fancy.

@AliseIam Месяц назад

Probably not in hetero relationships… not that I have see thus far

@Cryptisss Месяц назад

There is no such thing, love romantically is based on mutual benefits, these being emotional or physical, true love would mean that you put the other needs and values further than yours which will destroy you.

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

My husband passed away last year we did both love each other unconditionally ❤

@francesdonald8743 Месяц назад

I am so sorry for your loss! That is a hard thing to experience, and I hope you will keep your heart open to experiencing that again in the future. Every love is different and no-one will replace the unique individual who was so close to you. That said, you can experience that love again, in another flavor, when you have grieved and are ready to.

@Negin_arts93 26 дней назад

Im so sorry about it. The people who better die won't die!

@babydoll9354 25 дней назад

@@Negin_arts93😂 like my in-laws , nothing ever happens to my evil inlaws

@babydoll9354 25 дней назад

@@Negin_arts93my evil sister in laws uffff they are too happy uff uff nothing bad s happening to them

@babydoll9354 25 дней назад

@@Negin_arts93my sister inaws uffff nothing bad s happening to them ufff

@remieurena1081 Месяц назад

some men are born to fool around never satisfied whatever the woman is good

@evarodriguezalequin5705 Месяц назад

This is so unfortunate. But then when they are sick and dying they wish they had a woman nearby. I seen it all. Some men are womenizers. Sad

@jockamofeno7632 28 дней назад

I am like this I dont want to live a long time either

@melt2947 25 дней назад

@@jockamofeno7632You may end up living a very long time..simply because you don’t want to..

@jockamofeno7632 24 дня назад

@@melt2947 All of the times when Id be laying in bed next to my girl, I knew I was already alone My inner world, my emotional turmoil and suffering, this would send her packing. And every time Ive gotten comfortable enough to be vulnerable, the abuse would start, and then Id be discarded. So I know now in retrospect that the woman was never *with me* She just wanted to have me *with her* Ive been through alot, and this is how it goes every single time.

@aaaduccs6667 24 дня назад

@@jockamofeno7632 i hope my friends and i never have the great pleasure of encountering a person like u. i will pray everyday that god blesses me to stay away from people like u😊

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

I am a woman ♀️ and I value my freedom and personal space 😂. I personally have experienced more " smothering" by men than I have tried to smother men.

@biljam972 Месяц назад

I totally get it. I've been single for long time and now I am too addicted to my freedom and personal space. I've met men who immeditally insisted we meet on regular basis and hear each other every day, and I felt it was too much for me, at least for just the beginning while I don't even know them. They all left when I said I am not ready for that kind of commitment yet and I need time to get to know them. Some of them were really angry and pissed of like I insulted them by saying that.

@Liza-Loves-You Месяц назад

@@biljam972 Now that's an excellent way to scare off the ones that only want, well you know what 😂😂😂 ❤

@relaxwithme__ 29 дней назад

Glad to know there’s women like you! I’m a Woman who loves her space too and hates being smothered as well 😂

@monicab9961 28 дней назад

Same here!!

@abigailcosta1716 28 дней назад

Same

@tahniamendes9575 Месяц назад

Definitely harsh. Hardly seems possible to find a good man. Maybe better to just learn to go it alone

@tahniamendes9575 Месяц назад

@@martinlacunza5250 I was with my late husband for 41 years, never with anyone else. I suppose it’s not possible to find love twice in a lifetime

@TheLadyBlerd Месяц назад

@@martinlacunza5250 so to you, if a someone only ever had sex with their spouse after marriage and that spouse dies young... the surviving one is no longer a good person? 😐 how irrationally and unnecessarily judgmental, which is not a trait of any good man would have or not one any good woman desires. Genuinely hope that gets better for you at some point, as you might have a long way to go if you genuinely have nothing more productive to do with your time than comment on RU-vid videos intended for straight women.

@pendafen7405 29 дней назад

You can always partner with other women! Even platonically and in a sisterly way! Living and working only with other women most of one's life was normal until the last few hundred years, interestingly...

@Wewereneveryoung 24 дня назад

@@Nathanea21Please do not entertain the internet trolls. They know what they're saying is stupid

@rd5184 24 дня назад

@@epona1525this makes zero sense, what??

@pordniara 26 дней назад

I was 29 and had been set up to date a man who was 40. I've never dated before nor had physical intimacy with anyone. Nor had this man who was 40. I thought someone of that age would be mature, so I gave it a try. He said if im scared of sex, dont bother contacting him, so i didn't.

@SaveTheMessenger 26 дней назад

You did the right thing.

@alezy7645 16 дней назад

Wtf ...

@deepika3389 15 дней назад

😓

@miraiedits 7 дней назад

I love how you handled that

@hellohawra День назад

Only date a man older than you 5 years as max!

@bonnacon1610 Месяц назад

We need secular communities where women can live together, particularly in middle or old age, supporting one another and getting help together. Living alone is fine but not practical in later life.

@faodail3913 27 дней назад

That's one reason for having a family.

@bonnacon1610 27 дней назад

@@faodail3913 Family members can pass on, or move away, or let you down in many ways ... It's not always the solution.

@AkireMaru 24 дня назад

I would not want to live in an all female community 🤢 The pettiness and passive aggressiveness would be off the chart.

@kiaragaysekati1130 23 дня назад

love that idea❤

@jomansson5742 22 дня назад

Just to add that there are single men too, who gave up. A community of mildly cynical singles, past their prime would be amusing.

@f2dw 27 дней назад

"Secure men will never chase you". Wow that is an eye opener for me that is so true. This was an excellent list and I have experienced the truth of quite a few of these.

@BoldAgentMedia 26 дней назад

A man that loves you truly, sees value in you and wants to have you in his life will chase you. Secure or not secure has no business with that.

@Danken4 18 дней назад

no false, when I love a woman I go Approach her and she give me energy that I need to prove or to chase her its means. She doesn't like me back , men don't waste time on women who say u need to chase them. They are vampires they will consume your energy, your time, giving you fake Hope's that one day you gonna be with her after proving your self 😂 , it's a lie, when a woman truly love the men she love him back instantly 😊

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

@@BoldAgentMedia Secure men have lots of women at their feet. Theyre attractive. Nobody's fault, just the cruelty of nature

@JayasankarNair 16 дней назад

@@BoldAgentMedia once men start chasing women ,women see him as subssive and leave 😃 women care who do not want them because of narcisst

@superboy3633 11 дней назад

This is 100% true. Successful men never chase women.

@rahel5144 Месяц назад

This is horrible.😢I think I rather stay single for the rest of my life.

@galadrielwoods2332 Месяц назад

Yes, it sounds horrible bc he’s painting all men as the same. They are not all the same just as women are not all the same.

@monalisa2662 Месяц назад

Who are the women raising such sons???

@STak-ju7gx Месяц назад

@monalisa2662 why? Fathers don't raise sons too? It's funny that almost universally, the kids are the legacy of the fathers and take their names. But the kid does something bad, and all of a.sudden we find a.woman to blame. Even women hate.women this much.

@monalisa2662 Месяц назад

@@STak-ju7gx Certainly the fathers too. I was raised and raised my children full time while my father and their fathres worked full time so I was speaking from my own reference point.Nothing but love for the fathers... I had a wonderful father! He was working 80+ hours a week though and I saw much less of him than my mother.

@Dean_Winchester__ Месяц назад

Same girl. Males are demonic. Like, why even bother for such a creature? Thank God I’m bi.

@Kristy_not_Kristine Месяц назад

#1 hit me hard. My husband has been raging on me the last few months out of the blue. He's been impatient and unkind. I have not known what was going on until a few nights ago when I felt prompted to look at his phone. About the time this behaviour started, he began watching inappropriate videos on RU-vid of women in various stages of dress, or in skimpy clothing... so ya, I would say that he no longer is seeing me as his wife, but an object... extremely hurtful. I don't know how we are going to recover from this. Better to be alone than with someone who will betray me, though. We'll see how he responds when confronted with it when the time is right....

@pendafen7405 29 дней назад

Without delay please contact loved ones you can trust 100% to keep a secret and take your side, gather all the money you can access together in an account he can't reach, and make steps to leave to a secure location without a trace and without letting him know. Confrontation could endanger your life, and this abuser who's trapped you is not worth fighting for nor redeeming. If you need support or pointers, use a library/work/cafe computer or someone else's phone to get on forums and call local helplines or a shelter.

@happylama5744 27 дней назад

good luck girl how did it go

@pheonix9291 27 дней назад

Don't confront, men like this aren't worth the effort

@snowyyy. 20 дней назад

girl good luck. if shit hits the fan pack up and dont look back.

@dxnerro 20 дней назад

So sorry to read this

@kleinschmitterling Месяц назад

True. It took my mom almost 17 years to walk away from a cheating husband. A couple of years later, she met my step-father. They shared more than 10 years together before my mom passed. Just a couple of months later, he had moved in with another woman! This has happened with other family and friends. Less than year after losing their wives, they're marrying someone else.

@susandavis903 Месяц назад

Some men & women don’t like living/being alone especially over 50. My uncle is now married to wife #5. She will bury him.

@gentlegiants04 Месяц назад

It's a lot more important whether or not he was faithful while she was alive. Starting a new relationship soon after losing someone could just mean they are deeply lonely and can't face being alone. When you have been in a long term relationship and are used to always having a partner there to talk to and eat with and so on, just being alone can feel like torture.

@kleinschmitterling Месяц назад

@@gentlegiants04 The fact that they married so fast made everybody wonder if they were...

@alisonainsley7745 Месяц назад

I've noticed that too, they just can't stand to be alone they need somebody to have sex with. It's not even about love. They don't even grieve their deceased wives, already moving on and looking for some easy target.

@alisonainsley7745 Месяц назад

@@kleinschmitterling men seem to have issues being alone whereas women like to be alone and discover themselves again

@Lucida1818 27 дней назад

I am a mature woman in my 50’s all of this is true!!!!!!!!!! I live with men in a shared house. Their freedom and independence is everything I agree with this totally. My freedom and independence means everything to me too so that’s why I understand. We are just housemates by the way.

@shruti3465 16 дней назад

I was in a relationship with a toxic man for almost 3 years. He had no ambitions in life, all he wanted was temporary pleasures in life. Now, when he finally got a reality check in life, he started regretting his decision to play around with me, he keeps coming back asking for chances. Even though I loved him deeply, I know a man like him, can never actually realize their mistake. He needs me now because he is not getting the unconditional love I was giving him back then. Again, longing for temporary pleasures.

@ldr580 28 дней назад

Number 4 is true . My parents married young when my father didn’t have a lot of money so they both worked. My mom always wanted to be a stay at home mom but my dad made her work. I remember my dad telling me when I was born he picked up a second job just so my mom could stay with me longer when I was born. After she went back to work. Fast forward my parents are in their 40s and my father is the main provider and my mother no longer works. I can tell he quite resents her … I remember seeing him talk down to her as if she was a child in public very demeaning .. I also remember when I was younger accidentally snooping and seeing he has another secret instagram page just following girls. Now that he is in his 40s he’s having a midlife crisis and doing all the things he couldn’t do when he was younger.. you’re so right

@Violets14 27 дней назад

Thank you for sharing an honest story. ❤ It's interesting to hear your perspective.

@cheekytitaable 26 дней назад

That put tears in my eyes. Kinda hit close to home. But one good thing is that you are aware and seem mature enough to learn from this. I hope your mom finds happiness ❤

@KopyErr 22 дня назад

Yo my parents are like this

@libellchenhonig2060 28 дней назад

The 13th point about freedom is the realest thing ever. Every time one of my exe‘s or my current boyfriend was about to break up with me I was just like: ‚then do so. I don‘t want to force anyone to be with me. Leave if you like‘ and then they immediately switch topics. It‘s a weird behavior.

@DennisDelap 26 дней назад

Thank you Gomez, well constructed video. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

@DennisDelap 26 дней назад

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

@DennisDelap 26 дней назад

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

@kleiokaleidoscope9248 23 дня назад

Um...What in the twilight zone is going on here...?

@Proof_you_ate_corn 22 дня назад

@@kleiokaleidoscope9248😂

@theverhohnepeople8934 20 дней назад

It is an elaborated ad scheme here on RU-vid underneath dating related videos. Account 1 speaks relatable about heartache, account 2 consoles and mentions a pricey counselor with an online service. Account 3 acknowledges it's value. In the case above someone might have reported account 2 which then has been removed leaving a gap in the fake convo.

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

I have two brothers. Neither of them ever jumped from girl to girl. My brothers are not " stereotypical guys" though.

@justyna1863 Месяц назад

Mine is the same, he's looking for a "good girl" after being cheated on many times... He's handsome tho.

@danielle-bi3tk Месяц назад

my brother does jump from girl to girl and i find it funny how some girls still have a crush on him cause many of them approach me in order to reach my brother i try to warn them but if they dont wanna understad i let them have their lesson leraned the hard way

@madi8763 Месяц назад

We gotta just hook each other up with our brothers ig lol

@babydoll9354 25 дней назад

Maybe they never tell you about their reality , 😮 Or you could be correct

@babydoll9354 25 дней назад

@@danielle-bi3tkhey my brother had the same issue in my brothers youth

@sararatliff7707 Месяц назад

I can't find content that will help me stop wanting a healthy romantic relationship. It's never going to happen, it's an unrealistic want, and it distracts from personal growth. No one can tell me how to tell my heart to stop wanting it, even though that heart has been broken multiple times and is sick of it. Fellow ladies, throw me a bone. I'm desperate.

@venusdied6452 27 дней назад

It's normal to want a healthy romantic relationship and it's not impossible. Sure there are assholes but there is also nice people, you just have to try and find them that's how it is

@adu_adure1266 26 дней назад

Assholes aren't worth your energy, rotten men aren't. People existing to play you is a problem with them not you. You manifest your reality and you have to stop telling yourself that having a healthy relationship is impossible because that's what you'll get. You have to stop needing love, yeah you can want it but the need is how you undervalue yourself and put your self worth in these men and relationships. You are the most important person in your universe and have to treat yourself as such. Don't settle for rodent men, don't settle for people that won't give you the time energy or respect and fill your heart and life with happiness and experience. The time won't matter because you're putting that value in yourself and your respect for yourself with mirror out into other people especially men that will also respect you. Destroy your mindset, reframe it, and continue to be hopeful

@snowyyy. 20 дней назад

gurl im gay, wanna be with me? 😂💍

@d5h0 19 дней назад

@@adu_adure1266 Thank you, I was needed to hear these words❤

@CP3A4 19 дней назад

Gurl… stop watching rom-com movies, romance book and all those stuff that keep telling you mythical stuff exists in reality… these things will give you that idea, instead of that think about self development and how you can make yourself strong in every possible aspect and become the kind of gurl that is a blessing to a guy, a gurl if let go by the guy will be nothing but a disadvantage to him, nothing affects you tho… imagine being that powerful, get the taste of that power yet🙂

@lumity238 28 дней назад

My boyfriend of 2 years was so nice and honest and told me he loves me but is a broken man , and doesn't want to hurt me, and will never marry. Well we are still together and he is still broken and tells me ,I should find another man , it breaks my heart when he tells me this. I don't understand why... He tells me he loves me ... And he treats me like a Queen, very affectionate, but now I noticed his eyes look at other women , especially beautiful women. It's sad that I have too feel like he's over me ,but stays because he doesn't want to be Alone.😢

@Stella.N123 28 дней назад

Leave him, you're wasting your time and energy, but it's upto you whether you have respect for yourself or not

@clud9099 27 дней назад

Well let's stop looking at what his needs and wants are. What do you want? Do you want marriage? Are you okay when he looks at beautiful women that isn't you? Then make that decision for yourself. He doesn't owe you stability, loyalty, you owe it to yourself to find your own happiness

@Jennyetsu 27 дней назад

He is warning you of what’s to come. Run far opposite before he breaks you and you will never be the same.

@solmazsurvivor 26 дней назад

He's making excuses because he has found someone else already or has another one in the list. It's hard but value yourself and put your broken pieces together and JUST RUN. You'll see how you'll feel good yourself a bit later and with this experience you'll find another man who REALLY loves you.

@bubblesmixer 23 часа назад

Dont let somebody treat you as an option

@LilyWe-v7g 29 дней назад

Ladies live your life. Don't compromise for a man.

@FullMoon_BloodHarvest 23 дня назад

Number 4 is the ultimate male blackpill for me tbh. Knowing that a future husband will drop me in our middle age if he ever gets into money, that our life built together and love means nothing, that he only loved me for my youth...its just too heartbreaking. I'd rather be single or with a woman since im bisexual(if I could find one, the ones around me are straight or married lesbians.).

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

Yeah there's terrible black pills for both sexes. Oh well. Hope you find someone nice one day

@Kenl0x-lm7jw 16 дней назад

Don’t be with a woman , it’s still the same thing .

@system4686 20 дней назад

As a teen, I find this advices very true but it's also hard to act normal. I act very carefree of who I am, but yet men gets bored of me because of my constant happiness around them. Lastly, I act very obessive, clingy, and possessive just to keep them around the walls and how I like it. At the end, they luckily slipped through the walls and never came back. Love has taken a toll on me and I distract myself by drowning in books.

@kimt8162 6 дней назад

It's true. My husband married me (I was a really good option) I made more money than him at the time. Had children, I stayed home as the MOM. He had no value of what it takes to raise kids. I move to different locations for his career. He didn't care and left us. We were facing homelessness because of him. Yes, I was the nice wife. Good, dedicated mother. and he didn't care about any of it. When he made serious money, he was getting attention from younger girls and wanted to do the midlife crisis thing. His BFF helped talk him into it. This is sooo sad. My daugther has never recovered from this.

@GodHelpMe369 25 дней назад

All I do is navigate my way through the world... Doing my best, moment-to-moment, to endure the least amount of suffering as possible... And I keep doing that every day, just waiting to die. There's no joy, no hope, no happiness in my life. It's just pain and trauma and survival and misery. My heart is shattered. Rage and grief consume every cell of my being.

@rayrodriguessilva5172 25 дней назад

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him. Psalm 28:7 May Lord bless you and keep, let His face shine upon you and give you peace. Wait in the Lord Jesus, He is coming soon.

@psychomaster-0 24 дня назад

What happened why are you suffering?

@alezy7645 16 дней назад

Girl this made me cry 😢 please try something new, focus on God friends or charity.

@blueskies773 Месяц назад

At #8……. This is starting to feel like finding a needle in a haystack 😖🥴

@morganadavies8319 29 дней назад

😆☺

@bunnyworld29 Месяц назад

"Secure man will never chase" Thank you❤.. I needed this clarification👍

@bomcdowell-kim9194 Месяц назад

Sobering truth. I knew a woman who had been a housewife her entire life and believed so strongly that her business leader husband was absolutely faithful. I often thoutht that her husband did a remarkable job at deceiving her, probably out of love. He was staying in Paris she, where I live.

@jzwalz51robin45 Месяц назад

Sobering truth: there are marriages that are successes out there...

@bomcdowell-kim9194 Месяц назад

@@jzwalz51robin45 The problem is, the wife in my little story probably believes that she is happily married to her husband, while he lives in Paris, working at fancy job all on his own, coming home only one or two weekends home. Happiness is not knowing the truth! Oh, he still looks good whereas she looks somewhat like his mother. Guess what he is up to in Paris when he is not working..

@hikerhobby1204 Месяц назад

Was he faithful or not? Or you don’t know.

@LoveLife-oo9cz 27 дней назад

@bomcdowell-kim9194 Long distance marriage is always a red flag. I never believe in it. They want to keep a cheap or free labor faithful wifey so they can come back anytime at old age. Those guys are mostly yucky in my book. Demand respects and time. If he doesn't fulfill it, dump him. I wouldn't be faithful to this type of guys. In general, women often have soft hearts, that's how we got taken advantage of. The truth is men love gold diggers, because gold diggers are consistent and love themselves more than men. Gold diggers are often good looking. Why? They don't give a sh!t about those men, they take the money and gone. They are numbed and desensitized to the situations like surgeons.

@user-jw1bl4hq9j Месяц назад

I WAS SAYING THE SAME THINGS TOO …BUT THANK YOU FOR VOICING OUT THE TRUTH ABOUT MEN ….WE LOVE A TRUTH TELLER ALWAYS .

@lucycarrillo5712 Месяц назад

This is the most honest video I’ve heard concerning men. Thank you for this

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

I appreciate you took the time to leave such a lovely comment.

@user-hj6hl6yc4c Месяц назад

Thanks so much for this honest, realistic video. You are spot on. It seems to me that masculine culture, that is what boys learn from other boys and later other men, is that arrogant, self-centered, self-indulgent and shallow behaviors towards women are an entitlement for men, the way “cool”men should behave. It disregards the fact that women are as much people as men are. It’s as if the culture is saying men are the favored gender and the world is theirs to play in. Coolness is all on the surface, impression management. There is disdain from men for men who are not this way, disdain for men who see women as fully human partners like they are, and who are considerate, thoughtful, looking for something deeper with women. It’s a shame that the influence of good families, where women are partners in life and not interchangeable servants, goes against the powerful tide to be “cool”. raising girls to look for a Prince does not help but unbalances the culture even more. Women are expected to behave to a higher standard so they can be controlled because they are naive. The culture is not balanced and it is cruel to both genders. Women get used and men miss out on the deeper side of relationships with good women.

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

I can’t express my gratitude enough.

@bankergill8340 28 дней назад

I feel the same 👍

@Kenl0x-lm7jw 16 дней назад

This comment just says it all

@julietroberts1385 4 дня назад

Well said!!

@NicoleDea-o4f 8 дней назад

This was the most honest and truthful video ive ever seen on this subject. I've been in a toxic relationship for 14 years and everything in this video he has done, when I told him it was over and I knew he was cheating , he promised to change, bagged for me to stay and within a year we had our first daughter. He did not change, it was still toxic and got progressively worse while still saying that he loves me and wants to live his life with me. I recently found out that he has cheated on me and hes constantly on social media accounts asking women for nude photos in exchange for money and on snapchat. we now have 3 girls under 10 years old, he yells at me infront of them, tells me im a bad mom because I work full time, talks down to me and blames me for every problem that happens. I know that i deserve better but i'm unsure how to actually initiate it without confrontation, I want to take my daughters with me without confrontation but I know there will be. I'm just trying to gain the courage i think, if i was by myself i could leave a lot easier...i think because i have the girls im convincing myself to stay

@aashikumare7990 8 дней назад

Always remember, As a 19 year old, for me You are one of the strongest women ❤️ 🥹 You are literally a winner as a women I adore you so much 💓 🫂🫂🫂 All power to you Find peace, looking at your daughters and travelling ✨️ Love from India 🙏

@rosam4929 2 дня назад

He sounds like a narcissist. Make a plan and leave with your children before they are mentally affected by this. Believe me.. It really does affect the children and can lead to complex ptsd. Don't tell him you are leaving and have family and friends to support you at the beginning until you feel free and safe. He will not change.. They get worse with age. 😢

@charisse234 Месяц назад

Im going to say those were not harsh realities of men it was the truth.i have subscribed to your channel because literally every single word you say is spot on.thank you for enlighting us women it's greatly appreciated! Positivity peace and love ♥️

@joanneblack7697 Месяц назад

Ismael ... every point you've covered is true. I am 40+ now, and these things are now obvious. At age 18 to 25, they weren't. What your Abuela says is so true! Number 3, absolutely true. Best to leave this type of relationship immediately rather than try to "work on it". This is a slow moving train wreck that will drain you if you stay. And it WILL wreck! Also, "chasers" ... how right you are! They are not chasing you because YOU are such a wonderful woman ... rather, this type of man loves "the thrill of the chase". And once the conquest is made ... game over. Young women ... please don't be fooled by this type and think the "passionate" chase is about YOU. It's really just about him ... a certain type of guy. Everything on your list is true. This does not mean that ladies should "lose all hope" and begin to "despair". It just means please be discerning. And do not believe that life, relationships and people in general will be the way things are portrayed in Fairy Tales and Rom Coms. 👍🏼

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Thank you kindly, you’re a blessing.

@Kalavatinails 22 дня назад

I am so glad we are getting to the point where we are leaving men absolutely lonely. Please get it together.

@SaveTheMessenger 21 день назад

You're glad about making other people feel lonely?

@exxtra0rdinaryyy 18 дней назад

@@SaveTheMessengerwhat if more than half of all women decided to be single? You couldnt ever force them to fix a loneliness issue

@stylesyndromebygauri 17 дней назад

@@SaveTheMessengerGlad about prioritising self and not entertain/promote unfair behaviour ultimately leading to loneliness. Unless men start to do better, they are gonna end up lonely, because there are no disposable women to ‘use’ now bec financial freedom and laws protecting all humans.

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

That means more lonely women too. You go down with the ship

@SomethingCoool8O 14 дней назад

Women need to start looking in the mirror in a different way 😅 u don't get it.

@user-gq6uy8ey3y Месяц назад

My father way back in 1927 met my mother and had eyes only for her. They married jn 1929, had 3 children. Until my mother went to be with the Lord 1971. I married in 1963 after 30 years of marriage my husband said to me .... there is no one better than you. We were married 47 years until he went to be with the Lord. No stupid business about being bored. Just two people, meaning what they say and saying what they mean. People today...... one little thing. Pack up and leave. Shallow and meaningless. They have not a clue what marriage means. How serious it id to take your vows before Almighty God.. never ever to be broken.

@joanneblack7697 Месяц назад

This is the kind of marriage my Grandparents had. They took vows more seriously than many do today. They went through difficult times in life, both before and during the marriage. I think it made them appreciate good times and true devotion to each other. They experienced WW2, escaping from it, and coming to America, and building a good life from scratch. Having a fight and dropping each other over something trivial seemed, for them, to be a completely absurd and immature notion.

@user-gq6uy8ey3y Месяц назад

@@joanneblack7697 my parents went thtough world war I and Ii. We did not have much. Had a good meal, Godly parents and a warm loving home. From nothing my both brothers were brilliant, got bursaries, graduated BSc. MSc PHd MBA and became leaders. My one brother saw the carnage in dry dock of the ships caused by salt and set about looking for a solution to this ptoblem. He worked on it for a long time and developed a paint that no salt water would have an effect on and so it is. Used all over the world. When a man and woman fell in love. He would ask permission from the Father, ask the lady. They got engaged, married in church. Devoted to one another. Marriage is a very serious blood covenant before the Lord. Girls were virgins. No thought ever of divorce. No slutting around. A wedding ring was highly respected. No man or woman would think of ever going there. Today, bloke after bloke. Woman after woman. Lust not love. Love is a decision. You take that decision before the Lord God. It is very serious. You do not vow to a person. You vow to Almighty God. God richly bless you!

@user-gq6uy8ey3y Месяц назад

There was no fighting in the house. If you truly love someone, do you want to pick fights? No. I was married 47 years. My eldest son said to me. Mom, I don't ever remember any fights in our home. There was respect. I bet your Grandmother respected your Grandfather. Selfishness... unheard of. Men took up as leaders, were Godly. Took their families to church. Reverenced the Lord.

@TheElephantInTheRoom12 Месяц назад

Thanks for your comment. The more I listened to this video the more hopelss & discouraged I felt about having a good marriage ( I'm unmarried) or dating/ relationship. What you made me realize is that this is the world's perspective and way of being in marriage and relationships and that God's way is always best and he is always able to bring change to any person or situation and that my future marriage can work if I commit it to him. I needed to hear your experience because this video was getting heavy!

@user-gq6uy8ey3y Месяц назад

@@TheElephantInTheRoom12 the first thing you must do is repent of all sin and then say Lord Jesus, I am a sinner and I need a Saviour. I now know you are the Saviour of the whole world. All those that will accept God's plan of Salvation and that is the finished work of the CROSS. PRAY THIS...I ACCEPT YOU LORD JESUS AS MY PERSONAL SAVIOUR AND I BELIEVE THE BLOOD OF JESUS, GOD'S SON, CLEANSES ME FROM ALL SIN, I AM NOW BORN AGAIN, JOHN 3 V 3 I AM A CHILD,OF GOD. ROMANS 10 V 9 AND 10. THANK YOU FATHER FOR BRINGING ME INTO THE FAMILY,OF GOD IN JESUS NAME AMEN! Father God, I ask and thank you for my wife. I want your choice for me. A Godly girl or if you are a girl, a Godly man.

@gachaglitchtragedies1358 28 дней назад

#4 is EXACTLY what happened to me! I'm a new subscriber and I feel like everything I've heard from your channel so far is spot on. I got married at 24 and helped my ex husband through VERY difficult times. I thought that we struggled and came up together but it seems as though as soon as we were doing well he cheated w/other girls and didn't even care when I left. I was devastated for a long time bc I felt like I was loyal and a super good partner and it felt like a real betrayal. 2yrs later I'm doing alot better but I feel like I probably need to seriously evaluate and change myself for the better so as to attract better more compatible men when/if I ever get into a relationship...

@Lotta_222 Месяц назад

”A lot of men settle down with a woman because she is the best option they can find at that moment” - How do you know as a woman if your man is going to turn out this way? What are the signs?

@galadrielwoods2332 Месяц назад

There are none. That’s what marriage/commitment is for. It’s for committing to each other through all of the years of changes. Literally everything in society is disposable nowadays, including other people. It’s disgusting. Some signs to look for would be: Does the man have a dog or cat. If so, how long have they had them? How do they treat them? ------ What about friends? Do they have longtime friendships?------- How do they speak about other people’s relationships? Do they speak of relationships and other people as if they are disposable?

@ec1222 Месяц назад

I read that integrity is one of the best traits you can look for when looking for a new employee. I think it’s the same for romantic partners: good character is the best thing that might indicate he has the ability to stick around - integrity means he keeps his promises even when it hurts him (eg, till death do us part), impulse control, the moral disdain for women who flirt with a married man, a desire to keep sexual intimacy exclusive between you two (no porn or third party garbage is allowed to enter that sacred bond), and in general whether he acts in accordance with his own values in daily life - does he own up to scratching someone’s vehicle? Is he honest and reliable at work? Does he speak badly about others? Does he honour family bonds when that’s possible (not enmeshment but healthy respect), does he demonstrate interest in and kindness towards people he has no use for and no sexual attraction to (unattractive women, older women perhaps, weaker men, children, animals). The list could go on, but you get the picture. There’s also a list in the Bible which describes love definitively, and you can measure your relationship against it to get a marker if it’s love or not - none of us keeps the list all the time but the person you wanna trust in marriage shouldn’t be habitually aberrant from the list - it’s in 1 Corinthians 13 verse 1 if you Google that, it starts like ‘love is patient, love is kind….’ And ends with ‘love never fails’

@BurcuKyarGokkaya Месяц назад

@@ec1222 Even though a heart yearns for a husband like this, the person you describe doesn't exist in real life 😔

@Romainelettucetuxe Месяц назад

How do they speak of others' goals, and mistakes, and others' reruns?

@Wombiebat Месяц назад

@@BurcuKyarGokkayadisagreed.

@Hannah.1911 Месяц назад

A secure man will never chase. Thanks for the reminder and your videos. Love from Germany

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Much appreciated.

@alezy7645 16 дней назад

I don't understand what this means ?

@monalisa2662 Месяц назад

Who are the mothers or fathers raising such sons (men)? You are talking about worldly ungodly men... Maybe even the majority of men but not men of God who are not self immersed and look for ways to bless, lift, and love others. This momma raised two good Godly men alone and then remarried and two selfish sons with my second self consumed spouse. The real harsh reality is this... Your myopic view leaves little hope for women who love men. You are talking about selfish self consumed men who leave a trail of heartache and are never truly happy or content. Instead of talking about what women need to understand about men why don't you talk to men about how they can understand themselves and build a life of serving others instead of waiting for others to serve them. My father's life was all about service and he was one of the happiest men I've ever known.

@pendafen7405 29 дней назад

The difference between boy-mothers and girl-mothers tells the tale. Same as for a man, I never fully trust a woman with sons she dotes on, always something really sinister about it. Shakespeare was right.

@antinutjobs 23 дня назад

In this video he spoke the common traits and reactions of men that good women should avoid in general. It's sadly common that many men fits the description listed in modern society. I believe this video helps women in doubt of their relationships to make right choice of leaving. So it's not very little hope for women, but better hope for future by get rid of unworthy users!

@pendafen7405 22 дня назад

@@antinutjobs 'good' women? That there says all that need be said about user. Beware of men who rank women and abide by the Madonna/Whore dichotomy.

@artemisk.2334 18 дней назад

So avoid shallow people with no sense of responsibility and really insecure ones. Got it. 🤓

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

That's as simple as it is. Good on you for keeping a level head.

@Dalenaxx3 Месяц назад

You’re definitely my favourite coach, so smart, rational, empathetic and realistic! Also loved that you mentioned the point about X-rated content cause it’s so true! And harmful to the brain and interpersonal relationships 🙏 Thanks for this video and all your others, bless you 🌸🌻

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Your comment made me smile. I appreciate you.

@suzannemckenzie7035 28 дней назад

There really isn't unconditional love other than an infants and puppies but they are also taught good behavior.

@amandaboado7057 Месяц назад

I really don’t want that drama in my life. I’d rather be on my own with stability, peace and happiness. Men don’t seem worth it. I’m so happy I’m free!

@thu6064 23 дня назад

You taught me every lesson I need to learn about men in just 9 minutes. If I didn't watch your video, I will have to experience all of them to learn the lesson. And I already met one guy that is the type you mentioned in the video. Now, I know my worth. I won't commit to any men I think nice guys because they are real red flags. You will never see their true faces cuz they are too good at hiding them.

@SaveTheMessenger 8 дней назад

Glad it was helpful!

@eastcoastmusicmachine7989 Месяц назад

“Don’t expect unconditional love from your man in a romantic relationship.” Why?, men expect unconditional love from their women every day

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

I put myself as an example that men shouldn't expect that as well.

@francesdonald8743 Месяц назад

Doesn't justify the expectation, does it? When you encounter unreasonable expectations from ANYBODY, it is time to set boundaries and have frank conversations - with respect.

@DanandDonna1 Месяц назад

For that, they can go to their Momma

@bluraine7739 Месяц назад

Just don't give it to em. No point

@pendafen7405 29 дней назад

Men are the most entitled creatures on earth, they expect EVERYTHING and when they don't get it they throw tantrums and become abusive. Write offs.

@maui_3 21 день назад

A fool learns from his/her mistakes,but a wise learns from someone elses mistakes

@alexandrasmith7682 Месяц назад

Absolutely spot on!! I have two very handsome male buddies who are chasers. Women will talk to me about how they know they are the one because they are chasing them .... Meanwhile, I try to gently explain that this is just their usual play. One is now 50 - he's been married 8 times .... He has never stayed faithful longer than the end of his honeymoon.

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Married 8 times? That sounds intense.

@saynotohookups Месяц назад

Smh.

@wanderlustoceans8205 18 дней назад

Not only men like to experience freedom but women too!! I love my freedom so much, hence i rather have a man that respect that too and have healthy boundary from it!

@mehak7086 13 дней назад

R you independent?

@wanderlustoceans8205 13 дней назад

@@mehak7086 im an adult so yes, all adults should be independent and such

@mehak7086 12 дней назад

@@wanderlustoceans8205 which job do you do and where are you from

@wanderlustoceans8205 12 дней назад

@@mehak7086 do not want to be rude and such but, you are a stranger on the internet, I am wondering, why you are so interested on my personal information and life including my country? I only can tell you a have an amazing great paying job and I live in a first world country, really won't give you more specific details since I really dont know you

@lunafairfield9913 Месяц назад

the sad state of our current masculinity

@angelcoyote9802 Месяц назад

I'm sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing about your beautiful experience.

@user-bk3qi4tf4n Месяц назад

Yep 100% fact

@Ruthforme Месяц назад

Facts!💯 In no contact with a Sag now, he’s a good f-boy and NOTHING more. He was a complete waste of time. What a joke! SMDH

@stephaniethrasher7816 Месяц назад

Mine had 6 gf’s , loser

@jijadelmais Месяц назад

54 year old here, the last one is pure gold truth and somebody should really write a book about it, because is a hugh and deep thing worth analysing and discussing to finally learn and accept it young ladies.

@aravi105 20 дней назад

This is just for those, who have brothers , girl if you didn't have one , i know. You are the purest soul this world doesn't deserve, men these days are taught things by women with their limiting beliefs, so only settle where you see your standards are met , and never love a man unconditionally if he doesn't love you unconditionally NEVER. Give that unconditional love to yourself you deserve it❤

@lolitsmatt 17 дней назад

1. He wont love you unconditionally. This is the most toxic thing I've ever seen on the internet, and its truly sad. I've told everyone ive been in a serious relationship that unconditional love IS the pillar of a strong relationship. Ladies, if a guy says this, or hints at this in any way, its a giant red flag that the relationship isn't gonna be serious. Unconditional love isn't something that someone can ask for, thats true. But it should be strived to. And ive seen many people strive to it, do it, and its something I do as well. Holy shit this is a psychotic video. Couldn't even watch 1 min. Please retitle this video "Random pieces of toxic advice to random people on the internet no one should ever take seriously."

@SaveTheMessenger 17 дней назад

Thanks for your comment. Just wanted to let you know this point specifically comes from interviewing many married couples that have been together for decades. I'm just the messenger. You may be misunderstanding what "unconditional" means.

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

Guy here. I don't think women should love unconditionally either. It's how both men and women wind up in abusive relationships or look the other way when the partner is a criminal or a scumbag. I think you should be strong and walk away when it's right, and not be a beaten dog.

@vixxcelacea2778 7 дней назад

@@smileydog5941 Woman here. Been in a relationship over a decade. This division between people of different genders is the super messed up part. You as a self-admitted dude and myself as a self admitted chick don't have that much uncommon between us. I'm not an alien to you and you're not an alien to me. Neither is my partner. We're all people. This obsession with differences feels like thinly veiled sexism that is feeding off of itself. It's like finding division in someone of a different race or just skin color even if ethnicity is the same. I'm just baffled and creeped out by all of it. A lot of this just sounds like many people get into abusive relationships (which I have no doubt in trusting is the case. Abuse isn't anywhere near as uncommon as people think and it comes in many forms, not just bruises) and since the majority of the world is heterosexual in orientation, it will end up in generally men and women dynamics. Therefore, there is implicit bias into thinking it's all one the "female" or the "male" from both sides. I think there are a lot of people who are raised in toxic environments and reflect that. That and the sad truth that if you have been abused, you tend to seek out familiarity which leads to cognitive bias that all "x" are this way, because the person can't see the pattern they've gotten into. Which is absolutely not their fault because abuse twists the mind and requires a lot of different things to get out of it. TL;DR: A lot of people need some serious therapy. But instead we're shoving all of that onto whatever gender, genitals or appearance someone has and saying it makes them "x".

@smileydog5941 6 дней назад

@@vixxcelacea2778 Well said, I agree. It's important to not paint any one group with a broad brush, especially in heteronormative dating. What other option would you have if you demonize the sex you would like to have a relationship with

@angelspirit525 12 дней назад

Thank you for sharing all this. I realize from this that what I kept believing I saw in men is actually true. It makes me very sad and makes me realize I really should just concentrate on my life, making vast sums of money to ensure I am well-cared for, and no longer hold out hope for having the kind of love and relationship my grandparents did. I wish I'd learned all this ages ago.

@Sidd3102 Час назад

Bro ..your words r tearing my heart with an arrow.. u have sharpness of clarification and haste of proofs...

@spidermuffin1596 28 дней назад

At first listen to him really hard. Listen to how he describes other women. Listen more than you speak at first, it will save you some hard times.

@SaveTheMessenger 28 дней назад

Much wisdom in your words.

@sb853547 26 дней назад

I personally believe unconditional love exists for the good people.

@angiemartinez8041 Месяц назад

Insecure men will get yours shine ✨️

@maureensheppard3613 Месяц назад

Ansolutely then they go on & on & on & keep pulling you down - over everything thing you say or do or are.Twisted.Dont bother with them.

@galadrielwoods2332 Месяц назад

It is a mistake painting men as all the same. I’ve never known a man that “valued freedom” as you put described. I have found them to be quite clingy. I am an Aquarius so perhaps I just want more “freedom” than men. 😹

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

My husband definitely valued freedom

@blueskies773 Месяц назад

What kind of men are you attracted to date? Their traits (besides clingy?) I need to find those love language through touch men.

@smileydog5941 17 дней назад

Most men are actually really lonley so they get clingly. I would too

@georgiababalou7193 Месяц назад

I am so glad you mentioned the bad influence of x-rated videos on young people. I believe they damage their brains with such content as well as their perception on human relationships. All you said is correct. People search for security on the partners so yes the truth is a bit cruel. Romantic love happens in novels, life and reality have no "and they lived happily every after". Everyday is a battle and if you are alone is difficult but imagine how it is if you also carry the weight of a family. We all need to rethink our overall criteria considering human relationships I guess. Right now everything goes wrong.

@user-dd2fg7ru5j 8 дней назад

I agree. I've learnt something new - about insecure men

@gachaglitchtragedies1358 28 дней назад

#4 was the first point that really resonated w/me personally but after watching the whole video I'll just say that I may be saving this video to possibly show to my daughters in the future when/if I really need to talk to them about guys and then let them hear what I'm saying from a guy! This video is spot on!

@shayennebouts4724 28 дней назад

I love that everything is short, concise and to the point!

@RickStephVaughn-rp8dp Месяц назад

Thank you for always keeping it real no matter how harsh the truth can be at times. 🙏 ♥

@imazai4884 7 дней назад

I 'm 19 year old girl I can understand and relate to some of them They are all true and will help me❤ On may 28 , a boy who was my male friend confessed that he likes me I was confused at first , but i was also having feelings for him but not much as him He seems like a good guy After 3,4 days ,, i also confessed and then i started falling for him harder And after almost 8 to 9 days , he started ignoring me ,, like literally he replied me after 7 hours in day After 3 days , on 13th of june ,, i asked him straight , don't you like me anymore? He said i m confused ,, i was shocked ,, cause his change in behaviour was so sudden And in the same day evening ,, he said "No" My heart broke ,, it was feeling end of my life It hurted me so much ,, but now i know i have to work hard , build a career and pray for a good partner And will marry him So , gurlies i never thought he will change You never know whats going to happen in the next moment of your life So , don't expect much Work on yourself... If you have gone through any heartbreak , just level up yourself and in the end never forget to love yourself❤

@ronnaedavis2745 6 дней назад

Men, and women actually, will treat us the way we allow ourselves to be treated. Also, Joyce Meyer says "if you want to see the true character of a person, watch how they act when they don't get their way. " That was a real eye-opener for me!

@estyrandonlph9014 Месяц назад

My goodness I never knew a lot Both of my big brothers (apparently) made sure not one guy would approach me I found that out in my 30’s I was so mad at first but, I simply love them for what THEY thought was their station as my older brothers Harsh life never knowing love (all the this and thats) in younghood Super unbelievably passionately thankful now forever

@Mooo0oo-o0ooo0 Месяц назад

Truth is misery loves company and if a man or woman is failing, they will want to be around others who feel the same. Thus this video and thread. You're all fine, you don't need a guy with a opinion to tell you who you are.

@cazzawazzawoowoo1600 17 дней назад

Most women actually know this and have been saying this for years. This is why we want to be single. It's the men sitting here trying to tell us all they're not all bad like this!!

@valinski_ 3 дня назад

Nr 7: When he has no direction in life. I just got out of a 3 year long relationship with a man that has absolutely no dedication or purpose in life. I changed countries for that man and sadly I figured it out when it was too late. Signs where there from the beginning. Don’t try to change a man. It will never work

@marshaphonda7057 Месяц назад

If women would only start to see themselves as Queens or Goddesses, everything would change.

@francesdonald8743 Месяц назад

WRONG!!! Wrong, wrong wrong wrong.. Or at the very least, if you want to be a Queen, then treat your man like a King. Likewise for god status. Beware of your North American cultural bias. Then imagine you are the opposite sex.. hard isn't it? You want a partnership of equals who respect and love each other, even with inevitable differences of opinion or taste, etc.

@marshaphonda7057 Месяц назад

@@francesdonald8743 I never said you shouldn`t treat your man like a king. ;-)

@thetravelcrunch 23 дня назад

I was head over heels for a man who I ,frankly, was way out of his league. He would make jabbing comments sometimes I would dismiss until one day he said I had "goat teeth". What an absolute bizarre thing to say, it didn't even offend me just made me laugh! especially when my teeth are one of my best physical assets. I get compliments on my smile frequently. That's when I realized he was #3 An insecure man will destroy you!! TIP: Write down the red flags like this ladies!! You will dismiss it in your gaga state but he said what he said! ALSO most importantly only TIME will tell you who a man is, and his ACTIONS. So take it slooow and see what he DOES only.

@esraalrashed6867 11 дней назад

Insecure men part is an amazing reminder coming from a "I can fix him" // I'm an "empath" type of a lady. Thank you Ismael.

@anikasuraiyasura9158 25 дней назад

This is just full of facts. Thank you so much. There's so much to learn even if you're single or mingle.

@SaveTheMessenger 18 дней назад

Much appreciated.

@isabellesebastiansadventur1858 28 дней назад

Number 3 is my favorite because that kinda happened to me. Now I’m working on me and I can tell he misses me

@Moonlightditto 29 дней назад

I feel sorry that your grandma told you what she told you about love. For me, I feel like that was a cruel thing to say to a child. Maybe she wanted you to not be a criminal and was trying to scare you out of it (which is not how that works lol, but older people are like that sometimes). Or maybe that was her own sad warped perception of reality. But it doesn't have to be yours. You can choose to see the small flourishing pockets of love that do exist in the world. You can choose to make your awareness very attuned to the sweetness in others and you will be more light-hearted and naturally be more attractive. That's the secret to giving off healed, comforting vibes and not hurt, bitter, angry incel vibes. Things don't have to be so serious, life can be a joy. The married people who really love each other until death are unconditionally loving each other, or at least something very very close to it. I think love is like magic and it just makes people click and it makes sense to love this person and spend time with them bc they make you really happy. Love doesn't have a checklist, and its supposed to be natural and flowing. It should be easy. Thank you so much for the video! Much love

@nahtsch 6 дней назад

I’m very empathetic and just genuinely nice, like, I feed street animals, and feed homeless people, I don't scream, I don't fight, I respect everyone… Men always seem bothered by that. I’ve come to realize men enjoy being mistreated and they like mean women. To me that is a major red flag and just makes me feel really frustrated with the fact I’m a heterosexual woman. Women, on the other hand, love that I’m kind and they just feel safe around me, which makes sense. Men don’t make sense, that’s the truth. That's why I gave up

@mercifancy647 28 дней назад

Wow the most objective analysis I ever saw...u effortlessly put across every word so well...I hv learned something Abt insecured men pulling down my shine.....

@SaveTheMessenger 28 дней назад

I'm glad my video spoke to you.

@SoBlessedByYou Месяц назад

I wish this information was taught in high schools across the us

@fatemeesmaeili4522 Месяц назад

I think all these 13 are probabilities not facts, so to be realistic, we as women need to consider them as common male. Behaviors but not a definite one

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

I certainly hope that you are correct

@UnashamedCaliforniagirl Месяц назад

Because honestly he is making all men seem incapable of loving a woman in the way that she actually needs.

@f4lkonX 25 дней назад

@@UnashamedCaliforniagirlThats one thing I felt off about the video. Yeah stuff that he explains in the video does happen which ofc sucks. But it doesnt mean that all men have these characteristics (maybe some, maybe none) or all men are the same. Cant really generalize all people just from someone telling you abt men or just some personal experience. Generalizing a group is rather bias and stereotyping them which is more likely inaccurate and can be harmful. For sure, truly know the man that you have some kind of interest in before getting into a relationship and be realistic about it. Consider their flaws if youre able to put up with it, make sure youre actually mentally ready, and other things to think abt. Hope this helps somewhat

@vixxcelacea2778 7 дней назад

Common in cultures and countries that promote division between the sexes and obsess with gender roles. Seeing content like this is like watching aliens to me. I can't fathom people actually thinking there is this much difference between any two people of any gender. It's weird (in a bad way) and toxic. Sure, some people suck. But that's not a gender thing. Some people are taught dumb things about gender roles and are often repressed, misinformed and divided from others in both race and gender so that they assume things are so different. People are people. Some people are products of crappy dumb environments, childhoods and cultures and reflect that. Some people are awesome and products of the same, but good environments, childhoods and cultures.

@kittylove685 19 дней назад

I find all these disheartening... and it clearly kinda ruined the happy mood today... anyway great lessons and I will keep watching you... I am not interested in relationships yet... as I am trying to be independent have a career make my dream come true and make money... I am 32 and really behind in everythimg.. .. but this was a real wake up call as I am mentally kinda ill kinda a lot, and also quite disabled from IBS, this clearly shows me what I can expect from life... it is kinda scary... honestly .. kinda like a horror movie... life is hard and I like comfort and cute... but I think I can find my happiness... I am sorry it had to be this way... but life is not what it seems when u are young... and I have long ago accepted that.😊 i have also realized that romantic love is not without conditions... it is a different thing... seeing you explained it woke me up to the truth of the matter... and made me realise that for romantic love u gotta work like mad... it is something u gotta earn... this video kinda traumatized me cause i started being bitchy in the kitchen😢

@SamanthaOblea 21 день назад

This is honestly true from what I've heard from most of my woman peers and elders. For example my grandma's story. Before she married her husband, my grandpa's upbringing was not of a wealthy household but my grandma is in middle class, and she chose to love him dearly. That was before my grandpa got rich that he started to get attention because of his money. What does my grandpa do about it? Brag, boast, drink, and sleep with other woman. When my grandma found out about it, she's obviously devastated and outraged. The most pitiable thing about it is that my grandma was forced to live with that wretched excuse of a man in the present. As in forced is that she has no other means of escaping, truly sad.

@BBean26 Месяц назад

Ismael: I follow you and have encouraged a number of my friends to do so. We are women who are in our 60’s - either widowed or divorced - and it would be so helpful if at some point you could address whether or not you feel the remarks in your videos are applicable to older women. Sometimes, we feel isolated - a separate entity - and wonder if it’s ridiculous to think about dating and relationships at this stage in our lives. Some of us want to marry again, but some of us are merely looking for companionship. Your input would be greatly appreciated.

@SaveTheMessenger Месяц назад

Hi dear. Thank you for your lovely comment. Funny enough, my mother is also single in her 60s so I always think about her when making these videos. I had a client who found the love of her life at 61 so it's definitely possible.

@kathycoker7763 Месяц назад

@@SaveTheMessenger Where did she find her new love?

@NotAStanAccount 27 дней назад

Hello, all. I'm a woman in her 40s who has, at times, wondered the same thing. As much as i ADORED (and agreed with!) every word of this video, I must admit (mainly to OP, here) to having sworn off men & relarionships for at least 10+ years, and possibly forever. Reasons? I have a) children to raise, and b) very bad habits of picking scummy men. Therefore, my goal now is to work on myself & focus on raising my daughters, on setting good examples for them both.

@tobyfitzpatrick565 Месяц назад

This is gold. Thank you!

@sararouhi3942 Месяц назад

My guy is good in all aspects and we go along well the only issue is the No.8... he is lost for his future which leads dissatisfaction from my side since i can feel it completely when he is saying: "im there for his relaxation but not inspiration " ... its been 3.5 years i don't know what to do😢

@surrealstr Месяц назад

My problem is that everytime i come through a guy who has some of the qualities im looking for he is either low or mid interested in me

@user-wd3ou1ru5hlionessoflove22 Месяц назад

Thankyou for your guidance truth and knowledge Ismael!! As an experienced woman, some of these are common sense but still shocking that men behave this way Yes, they do change their minds about you at the snap of a finger, they do chase and drop too, they do also have a hard time committing, but younger women have got to look for all things and REALLY learn from them. I now give 1 chance, because I live by morals, principles and integrity, show 1 fk up now and theyre GONE. Because they're guaranteed to repeat that sht in another way and you open yourself to heartbreak. Be yourself but stay aware of their behaviour because, too many men of these generations even up to their older years still haven't grown or matured to even get to know themselves, so they WILL play you like a fiddle, especially if you open up verbally or sexually too early. So. If you have more red flags than green flags?? Say bye 😅 Take care of your hearts ladies. And this is advice I've already given my daughter. ❤❤