"Financial Freedom" is a big word my Friend. Even a girl's father could not say confidently wheater he is financially free even at the age of retirement.
True when I was in radison hotel Jaipur ….party. Me models and high class girls …..bhai Mai surprise reh gya itni sundar ladkia….Ameer uncles ke saath thi sirf paisa aur extra affair b
Being emotionally unavailable to my ex was the reason for my breakup. This happens when you take them for granted and don't invest enough time and efforts in the relationship.
Stop blaming yourself. Yeh sabka rona hai. Emotionally involved nhi ho, for granted le rakha h. This n that. Truth is she already found someone who is better than you.
Yaar parag achha kiya k tum usse granted le rakha tha, matlab kahin achhi jagah tumne invest kiya hoga. Kyun k ... Unlike other men you are different. Those men who revolves around pussy all day, they somewhere ended up hopeless, uncofident , not desirable goal in life. Yaar women are hypergamous in nature.. They likes to be stay in upper zone like they wants to wear good cloth, wealthy, fruitful lifestyle. Those men who have skill like u, stop idolise, stop pedastalise, taking granted kind of men who fall in this category called as high value men... So cherish your goal, your life what you wants to make
That is not love . If one loves someone then loves their unemployment, love family problems, love their personal problems etc. Then boys has only one solution. Get govt job then marry with girl whose father gives him hefty dowry. That is the slap on the girl who is pretend to b in love but in disguise c love his money, carrier, social status etc.
@@ChetanBhagat1 I would love to see your opinion on “Self respect”. I personally think men do disrespect their self respect a lot. If one can’t respect themselves, they can respect none. Hope you make it :)
The career point is true, although my only suggestion is, don't work on your career because you want to impress girls. Just work on your career because you wanna do something great in life. You need to work on yourself for yourself, not for anyone else. And we gotta ditch this possessiveness. Look the problem with guys is, we don't have any value. The girl ignores us, and we keep running even faster behind her. I think its high time we pick up ourselves and leave this race for women, discover the best version of ourselves.
My genuine feedback for young boys is to think of girls as partners/friends. I am now 12 yr married to a guy who is not only my best friend but also encourages and supports my career decisions. Once you move forward from the initial honeymoon phase of dating and romance, reality hits. Both individuals need to be happy and satisfied with their carrier choices( money matters). We need partners to raise our kids. Here in US, there is no support system. You need to be hands-on with everything. Giving space and respecting each other are very important. I think of my life partner as my purpose-partner. We are achieving success by literally taking turns in our careers. Coming from a mom of 3 little toddlers. Communication is the key 🔑 by setting the right expectations.
Totally agree with your points sir. One more point I wanna add is Career these days are equally important for both guys & girls, sometimes girls also don't focus on their career jus becoj they are so possessive for their boyfriends. Good career can lead to good relationship but not always vice versa.
Not true sister. If a girl is not focusing on her career or even if she don't have any job at certain age a boy who love her or any boy will marry her and will provide her the best life possible. But if talking about vice versa that shit is imposible. A girl with good or handsome career will never marry a boy even they love each other or any guy.
Abha Verma yeah I do agree with you entirely as in today's world both boys & girls require to be self relient as suppose if a boy losses his life after getting married & his girl stays just as a housewife then she will certainly become very much helpless
@@thebeatboxguy For girls having good career:- Ofcourse girls can look for handsome guy if the that guy loves her and posses a good nature then both can live happily, but only looks are not important rather girls prefer to marry a guy who is loving & caring. Coj looks would exhaust when he get old,but good nature will be with him always so he can better take care of his lady & kids😇
You absolutely nailed it Chetan bhagat ji..🙏🏻 I loved someone so much, I still love that person, but that person has rejected me, she outrightly rejected me, she didn't tell me anything, she just said No, and I Know why she rejected me, it's because of my career, I am not yet settled, that's the reason, hell I know, now Chetan bhagat ji just confirmed that, but let me tell you this, it's hard real hard, if you love someone so much, then it's going to hurt you as I am hurt, but I respect that person's choice and I am not that person for her, time will heal every pain stay strong boys.. ❤️
This is so true... Also, some advise for my boys Be confident Dress nicely for yourself Forcus on your career Don't be insecure and possessive Be real And the right type of girl will be attracted by you, bcoz if you are like this you deserve an equally great girl. *ignore grammatical mistakes
It depends on luck too. And past experience We can't say to a guy who was bullied in past to be confident He can try but to expect he will be confident always is unrealistic. But anyways I agree with your points
Truth into 100 . Bro , heart se zindagi nhi chalti . Its important but , girls look for security . And either way if you have a secure future and life , isn't it good for your own too . Plus you should also know your worth , don't sell yourself to anyone , just because you want closure , know what you want !
Too much emotional dependency of boy over his girl..I guess is one of the reasons Or should I say irrespective of the gender... never be fully dependent on others STAY strong...stay HAPPY ❤️
@Sumant Sahu lrkiya apne parents k sath rhti h aur bahar jane ka v mauka nhi milta upar se agar middle class h to sare bhai behan ka ek hi kmra hota h jiske karan wo baat nhi kr pati apne bf se😭😭😭it is also a cause of break up.
Hi Chetan... the coming generation will be luck to have you as their motivation guru. I am a 90s kid, who knew Chetan Bhagat after reading his first novel Five Points Someone. There was no RU-vid or Insta to connect to you. We did all these mistakes and learnt from them. Luckily this generation will know all this before taking wrong steps.
Chetan Bhagat told "Possessiveness insecurities se aati hai", I totally agree. But what if the girls actions makes the guy insecure, like talking with exes after break up, posting revealing selfies on social media where little to no skin is covered, keeping old memories of exes like photos, hiding small to big things, lying about small and big things. Isn't it enough to make a guy insecure, now who's fault is that? Guys cause he is being insecure or girls who is doing certain actions that are not suitable being in relationships and directly or indirectly making him feel insecure. If I plan to share my future with someone I need to know everything about her. Lies creates doubts that's how insecurities arises.
i swear i went through these same thoughts when i was with my ex. what used to make me more insecure was cus she wad actually a hoe, she was a cheater in the past, also she wasn't a virgin whilst being only 15. she left me over me being over possessive which has taught me a lesson not to trust girls who've had a bad past. they don't change. and i don't really care enough to change this mentality of mine. im good being single. im too secure of myself now that i just don't bother caring about someone else 😂😂😂 you depressed ass boys need to listen to some Future
"You're born alone, you die alone, and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one." Don Draper Mad Men S1E01
I agree with you sir. I just want to share my point on girls. 1, Dont try to understand a girl. 2, A girl is made to be loved, feeled & we should enjoy their presence.
If women are loved unconditionally then you shouldn't have any problem with them being workaholic and have big career dreams to pursue even after marriage which obviously no one should have a problem with it For everyone career comes first and you should know that and nothing even after marriage nothing should hinder it
@shristi aditi Stop generalizing, if killing of all girl child were true you wouldn't be alive today, neither anyone else. You have also generalized by comparing today's situation to earlier, by saying matured men only want to marry girl with job. Get your timeline correct. If you are considering how nowadays men wants to marry working women then also consider nowadays people don't kill their girl child. Give this a thought, anyways you'll get attention from feminized boys like @Electro OP, who thinks just by ridiculing someone for breakup or career will make their point valid.
Well said.. Every word of yours is linked to another, 1.yes its REALLY easy for a girl to get nice guys, but lemme tel you it's EASY for a guys too to get nice girls, IF they are sensible enough. 2.career is imp to everyone if it's a guy or a girl, if you ain't focused on your career even your parents are gonna take your case obvsly they wouldn't like you to waste your life so how can you expect a girl to accept you if you ain't focused on your career. 3. Don't ever be possessive, if she loves you, she won't leave you for any other guy, and if she doesn't love she can kick you anytime anyway, so why to get worried, and too much possessiveness ruins the relationship badly, 4.if you try to control her, she will definitely go against you... LAST....... if she is yours she will never cheat on you so why to get worried bro, BUT if she isn't urs she will eventually leave you so why to cry for some one who wasn't yours ever right !
Chetan Bhagat told "Possessiveness insecurities se aati hai", I totally agree. But what if the girls actions makes the guy insecure, like talking with exes after break up, posting revealing selfies on social media where little to no skin is covered, keeping old memories of exes like photos, hiding small to big things, lying about small and big things. Isn't it enough to make a guy insecure, now who's fault is that? Guys cause he is being insecure or girls who is doing certain actions that are not suitable being in relationships and directly or indirectly making him feel insecure. If I plan to share my future with someone I need to know everything about her. Lies creates doubts that's how insecurities arises.
Before some years ago, I used to watch such type of videos . Now there is no need. Iam very Happy No breakups No pain. Iam 38 yrs old, married and settled.
Agree to the Moooon!!! You are the super father of Indian youth. Pin point. Now, I am scared to share it with a friend who is having all the girlfriend repellent qualities you just discussed! 😂 He will jump to 🔥 probably.
Entirely agree sir !! Most relevant point is where no one should control other's life. If she is yours and you really deserve her, she would come to/stay with you !
I want to add 2 more reasons why girls leave guys 3. Having sexual desire or forcing girl without girl's concern 4. Maximum boys thinks ghar ka kam ladkiyon ka hota hai it became very hard when girl is working One Extra reason.: Not respecting girl's value . Well it applies for both boys and girls.
These are good qualities, even I want the girl who have these qualities or we can reason, merko chahiye hi nahi koi chapri ladki. And sex to bilkul hi avoid karna chahiye shaadi se pehle no matter ladke ho ya ladki itne hawsi mat bano yarr.
I agree! And mostly guys equate career with money which isnt always the case. Many a times, girls look for boys who are already into a good career or at least have an aspiration of one because such men/ boys generally (of course not always) tend to be practical in life and value certain morals like time management/ importance of time, being able to comprehend the gravity of the situations, living in real time and not in some lala land always, being able to shoulder the responsibilities, being secure, etc. Also most of the times, it is such self made men who are able to appreciate their partners profession or job which any ambitious/working girl would want.
@SOMA: Flowing With Life then leave that girl... and put ur brain in finding a girl ... who likes for who your..... update ur choices and see what u want in a girl and get here. if you still fail.... blame ur self for not finding such a girl... after knowing what you want.
Saari tension ladko ki hi hai...Gf v chahiye career v banana....😐😐😐 Nhi to gf chor degi... Aur ladkio ko..Bf chahiye well settled ho.. Bss..Simple.. By the way I agree with ur words..Sir...😊😊
The thing the guy needs to prioritize himself and prioritize his family that is his parents....you have to live your life ...there is a huge trust factor and if you do not have trust on them, you have to get rid of the elements which is harming you..career is important and you need to sacrifice everything to achieve your goals...my take is very clear reject everything other than your parents who are your best well wishers and live your life
I was doing very well in my career and I wasn't insecure about her still she left because I was too into career.... Girls leave doesn't matter how good you are... It's better to not focus on girls focus on Career when you are doing well in your career you don't need girl.
Girls often keeps multiple options. They compare people basically based on their looks also the security they can provide. Unfortunately most of the times they choose the wrong partner for which they regret later although they don't disclose.
Try to find someone who is happy with the way you are. Someone who does not want to change you or expect you to be someone else. Don't fall for someone who thinks you are a project to be delivered. Finally, don't just go by looks (what Mr. Bhagat said out of your league and some other crap), try to see the person within.
It's damm true , because whenever I used talk to my bestie about her relationship, she always used to say that her guy had no good career and therefore she can't see the future with him... really
As a woman I think that's because we owing to biology we know that we may be bearing children for which we will want financial stability. And it's not necessary that a woman should not earn for the household, but the traditional responsibility still rests with the man.
@@jayeshpatil9399 yeah bro they are hypocrite 😆😂 they expect men to be provider but when we talk about household chores, cooking, cleaning they have a problem.
Loved the comment "Quality girl knows her boundaries" Thats absolutely true. As such babies are clingy towards you, when husbands also get clingy it is rather painful :) ! Good point!
One thing i couldn't understand Boys will support a girl for her career but why girls are not supporting him until he get successfull in life ....he is trying his best then also .....
None of these points apply to me. And yet, my girlfriend/best friend of 7 years left back in 2015 when I was in my First Year Engineering @ IIT Kharagpur
I wish exactly the same from boys ,are there boys who don't have problem with girlfriends or wives being workaholic and gets little to no time for husband during her struggle period? If yes then that's wonderful
@@physicsislove6100 you said it as a reaction to his comment. Because you think he made a patriarchal statement. 😅😅 Grow up man.😅 Till the time you are reacting to someone you have no real existence. Speak something which you feel strongly about, not something because you want to counter somebody. Because that is always superficial.
Same thing happened with me .. He became too possessive which i used to hate about him and he stopped focussing on his career and used to abuse me or throw his anger on me anytime which ultimately led me to be in stress for a long time and i am still recovering.. I have taken an oath not to come into any relationship anymore cause it's taking my peace away
As a 25 yrs old...been in good amount of relationships...I can say each n every bit is so fucking true❤️ Bt definately all girls should make themselves worthy😊
@Garima Khuteil i can give lectures like chetan all day. I feel sad for people like you who fall prey to people like chetan and get their brainwashed. Chetan is always against dating, enjoyment..all he talks is career , health and money. Tell me one thing, why only those people talk of career who are themseleves a failure and making it by giving lectures to others. Why only those people talk of health who never read any book on medical science and have no knowledge of surgery, medicine, disease and body parts. Lastly, even young healthy people have died from covid at age of 25 , but people like you would never understand how short is life so that so that you can follow stupid chetan and take life for granted.
@@shivammahajan9051 girl u see all his video...he say keep career fist priority and have relationship later... He is not saying that do not enjoy ur life... U should see his videos.... I hope u r ok becoz ur comment says that u r going through a difficult time... I hope all will be good 😊
@@shivammahajan9051 make your career and then do ask for dowry or date a similar successful career oriented girl (financial standard) it's nothing wrong to ask since girls ( mostly) do date men who have stability or money in life so it's nothing wrong for you to ask it back good options should be their in your list. ( money and other factors from girls). Do go just for beauty ....
@@shivammahajan9051 bruh Ur the only one who said the truth!!!! I was looking for this answer...chethan bhagath doesn't know a dam thing... although I agree with some point...most of the things that he says is bs....
I was Broken for a year I used to cry at night ! ! My whole family suffered because of My depression. The girl who Betrayed me was the one who proposed me but when I started loving her she left without any reason!!! Anyways the experience made me strong Now I am only focusing on My carrier and Don't wanna get into any relationship Just want to make my parents proud that's it!! 😊
@@pritam5278 it means u gave her too much time. spent too much time with her. women love men like kabir singh. not nice good men. women hate good guys.
👌👌you are right sir 👌👌Career is very important , lazy log kabhi bhi kishi ko pasand nhi aa sakte........... Unki soch big ho , hamesa apne aapko growth ki taraf le jaye..... Deeply soch rkhe ..... Netrual hokar kishi bhi cheez ko dekhe..... 👌👌
That is not love . If one loves someone then loves their unemployment, love family problems, love their personal problems etc. Then boys has only one solution. Get govt job then marry with girl whose father gives him hefty dowry. That is the slap on the girl who is pretend to b in love but in disguise c love his money, carrier, social status etc.
Sir I agree with your points , and second point is the strongest reason for a break-up.... Possessiveness is there in a relationship but within a limit only and if it exceeds far it will turn into ownership ...... Thanks sir for your thoughts and guiding us ❤️🙏
As sir said, possessiveness comes from insecurity, in many cases girl's are also possesive, the only thing which help to change the possessive behaviour of your partner is trust😊 that's what I think
Possessiveness girl or boy both ko Aati he Gara larke Se jiyda Larki Sundar ho to larke ko Dr hota he ki ya Kisi or ke sath to Nahi he , ya fir boy smart hota he girl ko dar Lagta he ki sayd ya.to Kisi Larki ke sath Nahi he , logic Yaha pe ya he sir ya to hota he dono gendar me lekin girl Karti he possessiveness to larka ladta he lekin Uske hi sath rahta he lekin Agar larka possessiveness ho jae to Galat he 😑 wahh re duniya ,
This is the main reason why my breakup happened , I am a career oriented guy , but because of my over possessiveness the girl went , and one more point I want to add , some people are lonely they just want to come in relationship to fill that gap , and once its over they will go . So be very sure before choosing some one .
yes, I agree with you sir over possesiveness kills the relationships. Because, it creates trust issues and being insecured and jealous won't lead to a healthy relationship. Because trust is the key for any relationship or friendship. Relationships are too complicated. It would be better to focus on your career first. Relationships Don't go anywhere which we need to deal with them our entire life afterwards.
Books which every guy should read :- 1) Rational male series by Rollo Tommasi 2) Models by Mark Mason 3) The way of superior men 4) Redpill handbook 5) love letter to America by Yuri Bezmenov
I can share from experience that guys should focus on their career first, your health and building a strong character. You will be more likely to get a better girl at 25 if you have a good career than what you will get whekn you are 19 when you haven't seen much of the world. If you are physically fit and making good money, girls will come to you.
You are exactly right sir, things change for boys as soon as the campus interviews in colleges are over And girls now know which boy has better career option and earnings.
I am a girl and I completely agree with your points. I am myself a CA student and ambitious, so the very first thing I would look in a guy is the same ambition and career focus
@@vinayaka004 toh socho naa, no one stopped you. Guys prioritize looks and beauty over career and ambition. It's truth. I would love if guys start thinking like that
I am in class 11th when she breakup with me , and she tell agar tumhe mere sath rehna hai too tumhe friend ban kr rehena padega . I agree with her decision then next day she'll call me and said kal se hum baat Krna band kr denge jab tumhe mere yaad aaye tab call kr liya Krna , too maine thik hai bola , Lekin uss din puri raat mai soya nhi , 2 months hamare bich batten hue ki kyu tumhe friends ban kr rehena hai kyu tum mujh se baat nhi Krna chahati but har baar usne alag alag reasons batayen or baat Krna band kr diya bcoz of this I am in depression for 6 month and today I am a b-tech student but still mai yeh he sochta hu kyu usne mujh se baat Krna band kr diya , vo mujhe uski family se bhi jyada pyar krti thi.... Please reply me ?
That's completely fine. You don't need to give explanations. I am an ambitious guy and I love feminine and beautiful(mostly interior)women and some girls ask me why. I am tired of giving them explanations.
This is absolutely trueee... It's not like that the girl who wants will stay no matter what. Guys genuine actions awake feelings within girls. You should keep your career and family as your priority. Otherwise it's not gonna work the way you want it. If independence matters to you it matters for us too maybe more than you guys.
That is not love . If one loves someone then loves their unemployment, love family problems, love their personal problems etc. Then boys has only one solution. Get govt job then marry with girl whose father gives him hefty dowry. That is the slap on the girl who is pretend to b in love but in disguise c love his money, carrier, social status etc.
@@kpchandan25 This is not what I said. You got me wrong bro. I just said instead of chasing girls n stuff chase your dreams. The goal should be to grow with the partner. Even if that person doens't help you to that he/she might not be good for the specific person. That's it...!!
U r doing something really great for the youth , sir. I have read your book, making india awesome. It's really inspiring, sir. We indians are proud to have u
Sir I totally agree with you but I want to add a point..... Sometimes we feel that we love someone bt actually we don't. We don't understand the difference between love and ephemeral emotion. Later when we understand so....We wish to move on in search of a true love, causing a heart break.
2nd Reason (Control Freak) is most common reason for Breakups, it can even breakup marriages. 1st reason can be managed with sincerity of purpose. Indian guys do not help in household Chores. They expect Women to do everything..., a sense of preferential entitlement ingrained in by society in boys.
Just Read : "Two States & Revolution 2020" Books Of Chetan Bhagat Sir..... You Will Get Understood All The Chaos About Love & Relationships..... Still One Of My Favorite Author ❤️
Completely agree, my bf had career focus, that's why I never thought of leaving him. On the other hand, I rejected many majnu guys coz they did not have career focus nor career. For possessiveness I will say, those who wanna live with you, will choose to live anyhow. Those who do not want, will make a small excuse and go. Completely agree, thankyou
Exactly I too feel so,so I don't bother about if someone would leave me,but in initial phase of love blind trust on someone gives too much pain if she/he leaves u so take it easy,not like majnu who gets into depression after breakup.
@@abhinavverma740 Ek to population itna he Bhai Bharat me ki rojgar Ka kami ho Raha he 😂or tum Sabko add Kar.raha he Sab job hi karega to duniya Ka. Kya Hoga 😂 wahh re duniya
There are two main two reasons as per my understanding and experience 1. Girls in School, college and work places are fewer in number, and when you are not given enough attention someone else is giving! (this happened to me) 2. Girls has to marry early are you are not employed or ready to marry for some reason.
He is right. I was in the same phase in college and She left me because One reason was, She was placed and I wasn't and Second reason, I was possessive. That's fine guys, We are in a phase of conversion of becoming modern and belong to very Orthodox family or society. There is a reason behind everything happened in your life. Today I am placed and focusing on myself rather than becoming a bodyguard to her. Peace!
You are a deep thinker and you can observe and remember your experiences And these stories are all coming from your memory lane I like people who introspect and think
That is not love . If one loves someone then loves their unemployment, love family problems, love their personal problems etc. If anyone in love can't give moral support in struggle can't b lover. Then boys has only one solution. Get govt job then marry with girl whose father gives him hefty dowry. That is the slap on the girl who is pretend to b in love but in disguise c love his money, carrier, social status etc.
I cheated my bf at my teenager age and I am realized from how much pain he suffered. I arranged his number and said sorry to him but sorry doesn't makes any change and every day I am feeling very guilty for him but now he is with another girl into a relationship.
You were soooo true Sir......I can't express a lot on social media but the 2 points are really true........the main reason I have seen for the breakup are these two only.....
For me like boys also want their girls to have same career , productive thought yess I want she should motivates me each and every single day , otherswise no need of anyone 😂😂❤️❤️❤️
Boys should choose a girl who has a great career 💯🔥 Y should girls have all the fun ? It they can choose the best guy we have the rights to choose a best gal. Women should not be burden for a man's expenditure. Instead they should be beneficial financially.
But sadly this thinking changes after marriage as boy and family expect too much from girl how she will sustain great career..at that boy also make helpless face yar mami papa he karna pdta he..so think twice before choosing ambitious partner😭
Completely agree!!but my boyfriend is focused so I never planned to leave him...infact I always try to encourage him and try to keep him in a good path...but unfortunately sometime he behave so bad with me...I think his rude behavior will be the reason tht I will leave him one day
I completely agree to what Chetan sir mentioned. But these 2 things are even applicable on girls as well. Boys do like career oriented girls and who are confident enough and obvio not possessive or insecure. In India, unfortunately people have done Phd in judging others specifically if girl says somethings. I'm even trolled 1000 times for presenting my thoughts and opinions so that becomes a reason for us to not openly present our thoughts. Thanks a lot Chetan sir for what this video. I hope this video becomes an eye opener for guys.
Lesson of the story:: She will choose a guy according to her preference and her preference will change time to time and everytime she will put blame on you for being not according to her. Live your life and stop listening and caring about these bullshit.
He’s spoken the truth, at the end of the day having a serious career shows that the guy is responsible and able to financially support his family. Just like Chetan bhai says at 4:55 , the nerd or studious guy ultimately wins.
Nothing is more beautifully then true friendship in a relationship... so one should respect the bond of friendship and after this that relationship will be positive for both and you both can be better version of yourself... IF THE LOVE IS TRUE THEN IT WILL DEFINITELY BE GOING TO CHERISH AND EVEN IF THE LOVE IS NOT TRUE THEN YOU WILL REALISE AND LEARN TO CHERISH TRUE LOVE FOR YOUR FUTURE MATE... #Be the best you.. SO YOU GET THE BEST FOR YOU 😃
@@BasavarajJambagi i dont know whats ur experience but in my opinion every relationship starts with friendship nd even if you relationship dont work out then one should at least respect the friend....
Sir i totally agree with you. But fir gf aur commodity m kya farq reh jyega ? We are literally buying their loyalty and we can buy that of any girl. But love is in the example of srk , her partner chosed him when he was nothing. But as u said this is the reality we can't change it, this is what they want and we can't change it. Thank you
