My grandmother used to say that you need to look at your family as a house. The marriage is the foundation, kids are the walls that get built as you go. If the foundation is weak and cracks, the entire structure will be weak and fall. You always take care of the foundation to make it stronger so it can withstand anything. Ive always adored that advice!
New subscriber here. I've been with my husband since I was 14 years old to and married at 18. It will be 61 years in September. Lots of ups and plenty of downs. Life is not easy but the Lord makes a way.
Husband and I got married at 18 & 19 years old and I was 5 months pregnant. Obviously we weren’t living for God and didn’t for many years. We both loved the world! But about 10 years ago we both came to God. It took an affair for that to happen. We just celebrated 28 years married and we are both madly in love with each other. Having God in the center of our marriage is the best thing ever! Husband is my best friend, lover, etc. reading Gods word shows us how to love, esp our spouse.
👩❤️👨👩❤️👨👩❤️👨👩❤️👨Thanks for sharing this. Can you please share guidance on how to navigate a marriage where one person is walking more closely with the Lord, and the other is not. Also how should we guide the children when you have a marriage where one person is seeking the Lord alone?
Please share your story, I believe it will help my marriage. I have been praying for the Lord to touch my husband so he encounters Him. We argued a lot when it came to faith, and I have decided to let the Holy Spirit work in him.
Much appreciated reminders. Married 45 years and in this age and difficulties when you are both working at full steam. Relationships can just slip and be overwhelmed by circumstances. God bless.
You are a breath off fresh air the way you serve the Lord and your long uncut hair not all the makeup and the Godly way you dress your bubbly sprit and the Bible knowledge
Just started watching, but I really appreciated the scripture references in this video over some of the others that lacked that. It really gives me a basis of where to start going to the Word and diving deeper. Thank you for constantly looking to God and sharing!
You sound so much like us! I was also 17 when we got married. Will be celebrating 20 years in October, 7 amazing kids, Christian, part homeschooling... Just love your content! I feel like we are best friends. Thanks for sharing!
Thanku for being an Awesome example of Trusting the Lord & Not giving up on ur marriage! In today's culture its soo sad & discouraging to know that Christian marriage divorce rate is the Same as ungodly marriage divorces! It must grieve the Lord because of the children affected by it. God Bless 🙏
Great advice! I read the love and respect book by Dr. Emmerson Eggeriches at the beginning of my marriage. Very quickly into the book, he talks about wives writing a letter to husband's about how much they respect them. I did that. That letter meant more to my husband than any love note I've ever given him. The pure importance of spouses getting the love and respect thing down, on both sides not just one sided, can truly change the dynamics in a marriage. All the other things are important too, but if I had to choose one to start with, it's that!
You've been such an encouragement to me lately! Thank you! You are so transparent and honest. We did not have an easy start either, but by God's grace, He has taken us so far and taught us both in areas we could improve. I'm glad to hear from someone who has come from a very similar situation and didn't start off like a perfect "instagram" couple lol!!
@HeavenlyMindedHome Yes for sure, I'm always so thankful in this season that I continued to persevere and seek to honor the Lord even in difficult times (and even though I didn't always get it right) because now I am seeing the fruit of trusting God and being in such a good season with my husband. God is so good and we can trust! This video made me both laugh & cry! I look forward to watching more. Have a great evening sister!
Great video. Glad I found your channel. Me and husband have been together for 22 years we have always had a good relationship but this year we took in his 3 nephews and it’s been a ruff season as we have 3 of our own raising 6 kids driving me a bit crazy and I’ve completely forgotten my husband I don’t even greet him anymore when he comes home as i use too but thank God he used you to remind me of my #1 guy my husband
How do you cultivate these tips in A blended family? My husband doesn’t see his daughter often and we don’t have children together, so it’s tricky. I often feels he puts our marriage on a shelf when our daughter visits and that I’m not the #1 relationship in his life.
I have a question about the dresses. What type/style do you buy? I struggle finding dresses that are modest, comfortable and cute. I work from home and would love to get out of the rut of tshirts and shorts/leggings.
Great question! I prefer crew neck dresses as I don’t want all my business hanging out 😝 and I don’t want to be yanking at my top all day. 😉 I also prefer things past my knees. So when I’m at the thrift store I look for those two things and then work through it from there. 😊
Just a quick tip when looking for dresses at thrift stores: I tend to look toward the floor first… if a dress is hanging lower than the others around it I look at that one first- it saves me so much time instead of rifling through all the hangers, getting excited about a color or pattern only to realize it will barely cover my behind 😂
Just a couple notes I want to add to the 'quality time and intimacy' section - sometimes it can be tempting for some to try to use sexual intimacy as a tool of manipulation against their spouses, especially if they're in the midst of a disagreement and they're trying to be petty. I understand that in the midst of being upset with one's spouse, it may be tempting to be petty and manipulate them by withholding intimacy. But please don't do that. In the long run, you'll hurt your marriage rather than helping it. I understand not being "in the mood" to be intimate if your upset. So, instead of withholding intimacy to "teach them a lesson," talk with your spouse. Get to the bottom of whatever the issue is and reconcile, or find a solution to the problem to get passed it. I heard it said once before that "before you're married, the devil will try everything to get you into bed. And after you get married, he'll try everything to keep you out of it." This because Yahweh designed sex to be more than a physical act, but also an emotional and spiritual one. For a couple who is walking in The Way through Yeshua Messiah, it ties the couple spiritually together, making their bond strong, and a force to be reckoned with against the kingdom of darkness - a weapon of spiritual warfare even. So we cannot let the enemy get a foothold of the marriage bed. Something else I want to address regarding this segment is that, in this segment, the Scripture you mentioned mentions prayer and fasting as a valid reason to refrain from intimacy, which I agree with! But, there are other valid reasons to consider: If the wife is on her monthly cycle (Leviticus 18:19), if either the husband or wife are sick or injured, recovering from illness, injury, surgery, if the wife is recovering from childbirth, etc. Just some thoughts to consider.
I’m having a hard time being emotionally and spiritually satisfied with intimacy. I can physically but not the others. I feel like 9+/10 times we are intimate, it’s just sex and nothing behind it. Neither of us barely initiate. He just tells me he is always ready but never get that initiation from him. And because of that, I feel unwanted which in turn makes me not want to initiate. Help
Loved this video!! Any advice on how to get quality time together while having lots of little kids, we have 5 and finding time together has been challenging.
I wonder how to deal with the "wanting to be pretty for him and make him feel the happiest guy in the world who finds you so pretty" when severe health issues are challenging you as a person, your body/weight, your energy levels, your personality and also your "sexual thrive"... how can one then still put him as priority, even when those things kinda make it impossible? thanks for your perspective on that. I'm really struggling with that 😢 And this all makes me feel so ugly and not desirable...
I know this is an obvious oopsie, but at 22:30 you say, We don't have to follow the ways of the Lord...". I'm sure you meant "world", but just wanted to call it to your attention. Or maybe I heard wrong? Take a look.❤
When my husband and I first met he was not a Christian and I was. After getting married he became saved and we went to marriage counseling before we walked down the isle. My husband had an disagreement with someone at church and things did not end well and we stopped going (too long). Unfortunately my walk with God is non existent even though He has brought us through so many hard times. and my faith is not where it should be. My husband had a tough life with parents, several car accidents and even drugs. He doesn't like to talk about religion since the incident at church. We have had rough patches in our relationship and are not putting enough effort into it. My husband is stubborn, is quick to anger and set in his ways. Does anyone one have any ideas, other than praying obviously to bring Him closer to God?
I seem to be doing these things. My husband is my best friend. As far as intimacy, I know the thought of that wives never want it and husbands always do. Not in my marriage. This has been a struggle for many years. There's no infidelity or porn. I do need to be praying for my husband more
My husband loved everything i did for him....but it was never reciprocated...i got mad at God and my husband..I walked out after 43 yrs..he just didn't get it...
Wonderful video! Something I have never heard anyone else talk about is, if your husband wants you to "keep up on" your hair, nails, makeup, dress, etc... whatever that means for you... then they also better be happy about the time and money and effort those things take!! So often I hear of men wanting their wives to have their hair and makeup all done up, but then they are mad that she spends money on those things, and takes time doing them! Quit expecting magic tricks, men!
I think it’s very important to discuss what the budget for such is. Sometimes our spouse may not be aware, but also- sometimes we can be more frugal with what we’re getting. ☺️ It is a balance!
@@HeavenlyMindedHome Certainly we can try to be as frugal as possible, and yes the budget definitely needs discussed... preferably before marriage, right? Lol! I am very thankful that my husband is not demanding but I really feel for the women whose husbands are, and they are also expecting "magic tricks", like she's supposed to look a certain way without being allowed to put in the time and $$ and effort that takes! I think it applies to both the men who like the more stylish things and want their ladies all dolled up, and also the men who want the more "conservative" Christian look on their wives and require very long hair arranged a certain way, but then are grumpy about the time that it takes her to manage that very long hair and do that hairstyle. I know you're not preaching to men, and I agree with everything you said, and I so appreciate your videos! This is just an additional perspective I have come to see, and wanted to share. ❤
@@katieyungen1647 I do think that when we Pray and bring GOD in, Everything changes! It may turn out that the woman spending 60.00 a day to be beautiful for her husband needs a spiritual change not a painted one. You would be surprised what a .99 chap stick and a brush can do. GOD changes the inside and moves in ways I do not understand. The whole bible is filled with whiny people who want but never go to GOD in Prayer. It is when people bow down in submission and earnestly seek Him that change happens. Please encourage your friend to do the best she can (GOD doesnt make junk, There is beauty in her already) And to seek GOD Everyday. One thing I have noticed is that Men do not always know what they really want either, styles change but if we get it in our heads that I am not good enough, That may become a very large stumbling block for our walk with Jesus.
I would love to know how you guys did it? You keep saying a spouse that was not living through for the Lord and now he is a pastor. Would love to hear. We are doing much better but really Digging in can be a struggle For him. We have 8 kids and he works 2 jobs. Little two are 2 and 4 months. So hard to find the time😢
My husband feels like he's not loved by me when the house is messy, but we have a 2, 3 and 4 year old, I work part time, and he doesn't help with the kids or home. I have a really hard time keeping up with it. Other than decluttering (I've already done that so much) what do I do about this?
I work full time and I go to school, I feel your struggle! I have a routine that keeps things somewhat in order. My routine starts at night. 1. When my youngest goes to bed, I do a ten minute clean up: I pick up anything on the floor, load and run the dishwasher, sort thru mail, wipe counters and put things away. I toss in a load of wash and set the timer so it runs overnight usually it'll kick on about 4 am. I get kids backpacks ready to go, clothes are picked out and I check my planner for the next day. Vacuum and Mop when necessary. 2. In the morning, beds are quickly made, I unload the dishwasher, make coffee and lunches, switch clothes to the dryer, pull dinner out to defrost and wipe the bathrooms down. 3. Afternoons I fold the clothes and put them away and then focus 30 minutes on one room a day to clean before I head upstairs to my office for my classes (or head out to campus for my in person courses). My family knows that from 3:30 until 6:30, mom is doing school work, do not disturb. Dinner will get cooked and they'll he fed when I am finished!
I love what she said! 👆 Scheduling your time is key! Small things you can do before work and after work add up quickly especially for maintaining a semblance of clean during the work week 😅 I would also like to suggest if you can sit down with him and ask what is one area he absolutely had to have clean? Bedroom? Bathroom? Kitchen? Etc and prioritize that one. I work full time from home and also have 3 Littles so it's a constant challenge to keep clean if I don't stay on top of those small scheduled tasks .
@@tiny.terrorist.negotiator I love that for a working mom routine! However, since we are at home all day it gets WAY messier than most homes where no ones in it during the day until the parents get home and kids get home from school. It takes 30 mins just to pick up the items on the floor, 30 mins to hand wash dishes, 10 mins to sweep up all the floors, 5ish mins to switch over laundry, 20 mins to fold, etc. 3 times per day. (Except laundry) Then at night I have to do it all while fighting the kids to go to bed. By the time I'm done it's 11pm because I had to stop every 5 mins to put someone back in bed or try and do it quietly so I don't wake them, which makes it take longer. I'm not saying it's impossible and I have kept the house really clean for a while, but every night I went to bed hurting so bad, and too tired to be intimate with him, and it was super super hard to Maintain that. Working a full time job as a ranch hand didn't even do that tole to my body! I'm going to try and stick to a strict schedule and see what happens haha. Also, I know sitting down on my phone 5 mins here and 10 mins there doesn't help. Especially when that's the times the kids decide to make messes haha
@westdellarosecreations9827 lol it also helps that my kids are older! I have a 20, 17 and 8 year old. My 20 year old is on his own living in his own place closer to his work. My 17 year old is hardly ever home between work, school and friends and my 8 year old is responsible for keeping up on her own messes.
A simple system makes a big difference! I do this- ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-hU7HvHXmZTI.html But also- a lot of communication between you two goes a long way-- and oooodles of prayer! XOXOXO
My husband is reactive and calls me a fat cu** Am I suppose to respect him? How long do I accept this behavior? Also, I have a mind of my own and use it to make decisions without asking my husband.
#1, a boyfriend is NOT a spouse. Are you all getting married? What is the purpose of your relationship? I would start addressing those things ASAP. Does. this man love the Lord, does he live for Christ and desire to be a Biblical husband and father? What about you- are you living as the Lord calls you? I would start addressing those points right away. :)
@HeavenlyMindedHome Yes, we've discussed marriage. We're not planning just to date, but to marry. He does love the Lord and the lost. I see it in his actions as well.
We obey God ABOVE ALL. Submission is to the Lord's truth (scripture) first, then husband. We walk by our convictions to show our unbelieving spouse the Lord without even a word. XO
I’m not going to say I don’t ever agree with things you say. Asking for someone’s opinion is good… for both husband and wife. I dont think the husband has to be this head of household. Not every man is like that.
