7 Things Confident Men NEVER Do (Make Excuses, Play The Victim & MORE!) | Courtney Ryan 

1:00 - seeking validation/ approval 2:06 - fear of failure/ rejection 3:33 - making excuses 5:02 - being judgemental 6:22 - poor communication 7:48 - a keyboard warrior 9:18 - playing the victim hope this helps:)

"Don't attach your happiness to anything you don't control." - Taylor the fiend

As a 43 year old male who’s learned these lessons the hard way & still managed to get what I want out of life, I approve this message. 👍🏽

Mustering up the courage to kick-start your dream career is one of the most magical ones I think. Paralysis by analysis, self-doubt and pessimism are powerful roadblocks. That one little, initially-nerve-wracking step. Thanks Courtney.

Taking responsability for your actions and mistakes is the single most important point in the list. All other mistakes can easily be avoided if you finally accept who you realy are. It is kinda humiliating at first, but it's an easy path to humility from there on.

And confident men know which battles to fight and which ones to walk away from... a lot of guys think you should always throw hands If another guy picks a fight with you.. a confident man knows to fight for the right reasons and walk away from senseless confrontations with their head up like kings

"Don't be judgemental" is a real banger. If they aren't bothering you, don't bother them

You are one of the few content creators who make subscribers feel like more than a number.

2:02 Something else to add: whilst it's important to ignore the haters and do what comes naturally, it is equally, if not more, important that you should keep interacting with the people who want the best for you so you can gather a reasonable perspective on your attitudes towards others.

I love these videos. They edify and encourage aspects i was already raised in, and kept with, even while I'm 32. You were correct about integrity being most important compared to confidence

"Pitiful and cowardly" is great to hear regarding keyboard warriors. You are very wise, and have high standards and values Courtney. Thank you for making the world a better place.

Challange your fears. When I was younger I had many insecurities. Speaking in Public, about my looks, Things People sayed about me, I was even afraid of talking to girls. Then I read a book about overcoming your insecurities by actually doing things that makes you unconfortable. So I litterally did everything on a regular basis, were I was afraid of. Public Speeches, Approaching Girls, Changed my looks (clothes, haircut...) If People said negative things about me, I asked myself, are these people important to me? If not, I did not care. I even went Base Jumping, riding horses... This helped me in my Professional Career and with finding a nice girlfriend. Even to this day, I keep on Challaging myself to learn and grow. Everything is possible, you just need to be focussed and go for it for 200% with Passion and a strong belief. Even if you fail in the beginning, learn from it and become better. Regrets are far worse, then not trying because of fair. That's what I have learned in life.

I am not a confident person but after watching your video you’ve encouraged me to work on these points and hopefully become the best version of myself. Thank you.

One thing that helps boost my confidence is cheerfully helping others who need help without expecting praise, compensation, or the favor being returned to me

I'm glad you charged up the necessary amount of confidence you needed to start this channel. It's very helpful and I'm glad to see more women willing to help men in a healthy non-condescending way. You still hold men accountable (and even women) yet aren't so jaded by men like so many other women are these days.

Courtney - I very much appreciate when you mention the areas in which you struggle. It adds a "human" touch to your presentation. Good content; I very much enjoy your positive message. BTW - I struggle with fear of failure and procrastination.

Courtney's feminine energy is so encouraging. She's the sister we've always wanted. Sometimes, we men need a woman like Courtney to say, "Go for it".

As a classical musician and single man, number 1 and number 2 are tough for me and I’m constantly working on them. The peach analogy really hit home for me. Awesome video, Courtney!

5:09 The light analogy is the exact one I use at work the most. People always feel they have to make you look worse, rather than just being better themselves. I've gotten into the habit of helping others brighten their light slightly, anytime I know im going to shine. It hedges against the negativity and makes everyone better along the way!

I really liked this video! Number 5 sounded to me like "learn to be more assertive", which I've struggled with in the past and I'm still learning and developing that trait now. Courtney, I'm still looking through all of your videos when I have time. But I would love to see a video on conversational communication. I'm not great at it and could use the extra help. Thank you Courtney!!

This video came at the right moment for me. Thank you. 31 years old , still learning and self improving.

Been trying to work on all seven of these things, particularly failure and rejection. Been using this quote at the moment “Action cures fear” . It has helped me a lot. Thanks for this video, it has helped keep me on track.

I think sometimes it is necessary to acknowledge one's victimhood if one is in an abusive or traumatic situation. When i was 19, I had my first sexual experience which was pretty negative. I went a long time thinking that that was how women normally behaved and I was pretty messed up. Once I acknowledged that i had been abused i was able to start my healing journey. I'm in a good place now, but it took a long time to get here.

I noticed when I had a downfall during the pandemic, a lot of this stuff in me came out but not all of it. I also learned that a negative person often exhibits these traits as well. When I got away from that negative person, a lot of my confidence came back up.

Love this Woman’s energy for sure, keep it going💯

I’m so glad you got over your fears and launched your channel. I appreciate your insights.

I really appreciate that you don't put yourself above these common human faults, but rather bring them to our attention. You are with out doubt helping me make a better person of myself Thanks Courtney.

Hey Courtney thanks for everything you have done. These videos are awesome and helped me in many ways. Continue the hard work!

People with ADHD fear rejection. It’s like the most painful feeling in the world to them. I can’t even describe it but after i learned that it explained so much about why I struggle with rejection. Moving past it is not easy.

You hit the nail right on the head with the very first point for me. I think the only reason I see the validation from others is because i've spent most of my life, younger, being torn down by those around me for trying to be me. People don't like to raise on another up to be the best, but rather pull them down to the lowest. I've been trying harder this year to break out of that and just be me no matter what.

Again Courtney thank you so much for your content. I know there are trolls and men that oppose your content, but that’s on them. If a negative person comes on here and bashes you, that’s a reflection on their character not yours. Thanks again 🙏👍🙂

Ove learned so much from Courtney..she is so helpful I been working on my self and rewiring my kind ..just want add that tomorrow is not guaranteed..time is short..take action now ..don't wait..you don't have time ..thank courtney..be safe stay well ..❤

Last vid from Courtney for week,now next one will be in Thursday.Thankyou Courtney for amazing videos for the week

Number 1 had me locked in a pattern of self sabotage for almost a whole decade, and it had affected almost every area of my life. Don't let it do that to you. I am so glad to be free.

I liked what you said in number 5. I am 33 years old and always avoid some kind of conflict with other people. But you are right, tough conversations must be had.

Congratulations on reaching 200,000 subscribers. You have provided positive content for the dating niche, which I haven't been able to find anywhere else.

You do a great job with these videos. Speak the truth, real and down to earth. The topics you covered in this one was on point!

' Hi everyone, Welcome back to my channel is my favorite line'. Keep it up Courtney you make amazing videos which really help.

"If that person can't change that thing about them in 5 minutes, then don't say it" This kind of blew my mind. Makes total sense and is so simple. Thanks for the great video!

I really liked this video, it touched on a spectre of different topics but we're all correlated to confidence. I've struggled with confidence all my life, and this videos really opens my eyes for what I need to do. Thanks a lot

Great share Courtney. Love all your points. I would say to people don’t be too hard on yourself. If you’re not confident now you can with time and effort.

Avoiding conflict is one of my top bad habits, if not the worse. And it makes life so much harder. I had to deal with a bully at work recently. The fact that I got in conflict with them and talked to my supervisor about the situation I know saved me was so much less emotionally draining than if I avoided the conflict. That bully and I are actually getting along now and they are a little timid of me now. I'm not flipping the tables on them, but I am sticking to my boundaries on this. I'm still friendly, but I think they realize I don't trust them that much. Standing up for yourself can be very hard at times. However, it often makes life a lot easier in the long run.

You’re smart and elegant Courtney. And so young. Thanks for another great video! I loved what you said about keyboard warriors! There’s something wicked about the internet that makes people super mean. The same with driving cars, it makes people super mean. A lot of people are aggressive and angry behind the wheel, they tailgate and cuss people out

Huge fan Courtney! You actually seem to care about the struggle young men (and maybe women) face! Thank you for your content!

Subbed a long time ago and to watch the channel now be at 200K subs is amazing, it went up so fast... shows the quality of your work. Congrats and keep going ! 🤜🤛

a bonus one: being overly apologetic. no, apologies aren’t “weak” or lame, but being TOO apologetic is annoying asf. learned this the hard way. great video btw !!

Amazing video Courtney! I will show it to my students in class. Hope they can all learn something ^___^

You are really doing a great job,honsetly!..Thank You for sharing your energy!

Courtney congrats for 200k subscribers, lot more success to come, wish you good luck alpha girl ❤

Yeah this definitely isn't a attack on men. I think Courtney is only trying to help. To me being confident means not being afraid to show when something is bothering you so you can talk about it and find a solution. We all wanna be accepted and not rejected but it's apart of life. What is for us, will attract us. Anyways that's my Ted Talk comment lol. By the way, i did watch and commented on the last 2 videos just so you know i supported those. Have a lovely day 💛💫

I agree with most of what’s said in this video. I agree that confident people aren’t judgmental. There is a proper way to go about handling disagreements But I do believe confident people are open about things they are critical of. There is a difference between being critical of something and being judgmental. People are often to afraid to speak their minds out of tear of being seen as “judgmental and intolerant”. And being afraid to speak your mind and stand up for what you believe in, out of fear of being seen as judgmental, doesn’t make you a confident person, it makes you a coward. Because if you were confident that what you believe is right, you wouldn’t allow others to walk all over you and tell you to shut up.

Self awareness is a foundation of all mentioned traits. Thanks for remind us🙏

One thing that immensely bothers me is validation seekers. I learned at a young age with older siblings to kinda be in my own world and there’s a bit of independence that comes with that. You find ways to entertain yourself and find joy in what you’re into and not worry about keeping up with everyone else. I never made a point to show everyone what I was up to. I didn’t care and I naturally didn’t. That’s the independent part of the whole not fitting in or knowing your place. Being the youngest I was always the one left out of most things growing up. So I got into model trains and would set them up in my room and run them under my bed and in the closet out into the hallways. Eventually the older ones took notice in how much fun I was having with it and they wanted to play too. But I didn’t let them touch my trains. They were too busy for me in their worlds so why would I let them in on mine? But here’s the part about validation I wanted to make: you don’t have to show off what you’re doing to get attention. Just be you and do your thing naturally, and naturally people will notice you. They will come to you. I know a guy who puts his whole life on display for the world to see via social media. His Instagram is plastered with everything about him. There’s no mystery to the man. It’s exhausting sometimes to have to keep up with his constant posting numerous times a day about random things happening. I go months without posting and it’s not because I don’t have anything to post but I don’t feel a need to keep people informed about what I’m up to. Naturally people ask what I’m up to. And as a result I’m not stressing over not getting fake attention like this guy does. Literally all he does is give daily/weekly updates on his life and how awesome it is but then he cries about not having a girlfriend. Therein (possibly, most likely) lies his problem. Another example of this was in college with a roommate I had. He came into my room and got in my face basically tried to intimidate me by showing off his muscles and the guy looked at me straight in the eye and said, “You’re afraid of me. I can tell.” I almost died that day from the laughter from that comment. But this went on for awhile. He would buy expensive things and come in my room to show it off and ask what I thought about it and tell me how expensive it was. He bought a pair of shoes and came in all excited and asked me what I thought about his new, expensive shoes. I just said they were nice…he smiles. Then I said, “But I wouldn’t wear them.” He immediately got defensive and couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t wear them just because he would. Not my style of shoe, not into the colors, too expensive, etc. So what does the guy do? He returned them. All because I gave an honest opinion and he couldn’t handle it. What good did it do him to keep seeking validation? Nothing. I wear my shoes and I get decent compliments on them. But one time my brother’s roommate walked through the door one night when we were all hanging out and he saw my shoes and he said “They were gay.” Oh, really. His opinion. Did I go and return them? Fuck no. I like what I like, so I bought 3 more pairs. That’s true confidence. Just be you. Don’t worry about what others think or feel about what you should like or not like, or what you should or shouldn’t be doing. They’re the ones with confident issues.

Geez this woman knows more about men than real men and honestly could make a better man than most men

Courtney you speak truth and reality with passion and insight. These are things that people really don't think about or us reflection or introspection thank you🙏

Courtney is always kind and thoughtful. That's real, can't fake that.

Great Video . My thoughts are numbers 4,6,and 7 run hand in hand. The great thing about that is if you clean one up I fell the other 2 will be easier to fix thanks for these videos.

Great channel Courtney. Very uplifting and very pleasant.

Thank you courtney; you always leave us so desperate to see you again.

Great advice once again, nicely explained and fyi, you really look great in green. Really matches with your eyes. Thanks again Courtney Ryan

Hi Courtney 👋 You have nailed with this video. Excellent video for those people who has no confidence in themselves. Keep it up girl, I love you !!

One of your best vids, Courtney. Well done and thought through.

Being true to yourself is the best thing for yourself and partner. I'm not going to please anyone or be someone I'm not.

Great video as always, Courtney 🥰

Spot on. Per usual. Thanks, Courtney

Thank you Courtney, the clarification you mention, I went with and I'm a much happier me! X

How could anyone not like you. Your so nice and real with really great advise.

This young woman's emotional intelligence absolutely amazes me. Every video she produces is right on point with zero pretence and "down-to-earth" wisdom. Well done Courtney. I'll be a long time subscriber and looking forward to many more years of viewing.

I TOLD YOU CLEARLY we are friends GROUPS ARE REMOVED PERMANENTLY. I feel better BECAUSE of your friendly talks

Thanks Courtney! I love your videos! Great advice!

Hi Courtney, I'm relatively new to you chanel and felt compelled to post a comment- Just wanted to Thank You for another thoughtful, insightful video- I don't know what your background is, (obviously), however I appreciate the fact that you are compelled to help others with your content- I think you are a very squared away young lady not to mention easy on the eyes with "0" attitude! Keep up the good work, look forward to future presentations :)

I always remind myself that I wake up a bad mf and no matter what someone else says or does when I go to bed, I'm still going to be that bad mf.

You're right... Seeking validation is when you rear up and run right into the curb. I've made a million mistakes, except when it came to myself and you (all). Excuses/procrastination means: Take my advice; I don't use it anyway. Excessive judgmental tendencies is a red flag for low integrity. Successful team effort requires communicating, even if it's the human race. Mean people are the ones that do poorly in EQ analysis. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Imagined victimization : Like searching in the dark for the leak in life's gas-pipe... with a bic lighter. My grandmother told me, "Laugh and the world laughs with you. Weep, and you weep alone." A little appreciative gift for Courtney: It's the small moments that breathe life into experience and should be seized upon. It's not like looking for souvenirs from life, but experiencing the journey.

These were wonderful. Nothing better then always looking for improvement and growth.

Wise words. A good blueprint for a positive self and friendships.

This is awesome ! More mindset love you Courtney

Thank you for this video. Touched alot of topics in my life atm.👍

I like a lot of Courtney's videos. She has a lot of practicality about her that makes her seem a lot older than she is. I think that the comment at 8:20 something is slightly off. There is no point in trying to change something about someone that they have no control over. That being said, if there is something that they can't change in "10 minutes" does that mean that you shouldn't try to help them? I think not. Just don't be a jerk about it. There is a right and wrong way to change someone, to help someone. Thank you Courtney for sharing your knowledge with us. It has changed me.

I'm confident in some ways & I'll always be alone, but I do possess some good qualities. The truth is I hate any form of compromise, so singledom is the only real option for me. No Serial Killer.

You were completly right about all points in this video ! especially the 6th point, thats pretty accurate description, of how our current disgusting society works.

SOOO wise Courtney! Excellent video!

A+ message. I love the positive videos. Great help and thank you

Your videos are the best and your voice is calming

I always feel better about myself after watching her videos x

Thank you Mrs. Ryan. I have benefited from your podcasts.

You found the words that i needed to express how i feel about all this. Thank you.

You are very wise and mature for 25. Love your content. Your success is well earned.

WOW!you are very knowledgeable COURTNEY! Bravo!

One thing I work on is being more understanding. When someone is being immoral or you feel like judging or hating them, try to understand why they are acting or being a certain way and show some empathy. Hard to do but I’m working on it!

1. Seeking Validation. 2. Fear of Failure and Rejection. 3. Making Excuses - can only hurt and dismpower you, procrastinate, just use time. 4. Judgemental. 5. Poor communication - including putting off problems. 6. Keyboard warrior... 7. playing victim - not introspective or empowering, just blame others, no improving.

Thanks for these videos! You are amazing!

This was great, thanks for sharing.

Very well said!!!!! COMMUNICATION solves a ton of misunderstandings

Came across this video at the right time. Good advice!

Courtney is a breath of fresh air of a smart feminine woman. Something I personally don’t see too much. Most women are extremely egotistical with low self esteem.

Social media has made too many people comfortable with disrespecting people and not getting punched in the mouth for it. 👊👊👊👊

Guys I was watching this video at 240p ,I taught it was running at 1080p n freked out! # The point here is Courtney is giving it all,this is quality stuff(all heads down to the lady with brown hair)

Not only can being judge mental hurt someone else but you’re hurting yourself as well. If you have to judge someone to feel better then you have more issues then you realize.

This was extremely helpful thank you so much!

Congratulations on your 200k subs🥰❤️