Abandonment Issues: Signs, Causes & How to Overcome

Rabbi Simon Jacobson at Meaningful Life Center

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Do you have a fear of being abandoned? Abandonment issues involve a deep fear of being hurt, rejected, or abandoned. Fear of abandonment is a form of anxiety that often develops in response to specific painful or traumatic experiences like childhood abuse, neglect, or the loss of a loved one. Abandonment issues are closely linked to insecure attachment styles which are characterized by difficulty forming close, stable relationships with others.
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Опубликовано:

9 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 69

@Francisfaustina 5 месяцев назад

I had a dysfunctional family and abuse by my father. My husband (RIP) said something very wise to me. "You just need to belong"

@Learning_tobeaaJW 5 месяцев назад

I know exactly what he’s talking about from first hand experience

@Alan-Godden 5 месяцев назад

Yep, me too. I'm disabled and disfigured terribly. People treat me awful. I have no one who gives a #$@% about me.

@monilev1 5 месяцев назад

@@Alan-GoddenIf I had the opportunity to meet you I assure you I would care for you. It's not what you look like, it's your soul and heart what counts. Be blessed

@Alan-Godden 5 месяцев назад

@monilev1 That's very kind of you. You are a Godly person clearly. However, there are many far worse off than me. I really appreciate your kindness, tho it will not go unrewarded. God gives me what I need, not what I want, so I'll be ok. 💝

@k.st.angelo1108 5 месяцев назад

Appreciate this video. I was given up for adoption by my birth mother and adopted by severely dysfunctional child abusers. My adopted parents are dead (15 years), and I was happy to refuse their death bed requests to see me. My faith in God has given me the ability to rise above the horrible circumstances that I was born into. ✌️😊

@hollylorn131 5 месяцев назад

Thank you for this video, Rabbi Jacobson. May you be blessed for your work on this channel. I would like to hear more videos on this subject of abandonment, even a series. This video helped me. Thank you. 🙏 ❤️

@melissak.8385 5 месяцев назад

Thank you, I appreciate you and this message..feels healing to listen. These hurts that happen when we are so young and hopeful. No one would intentionally wish abandonment to be passed down generationally, and yet it becomes a painful life pattern. Kindness makes such a difference in our world. May we reflect the same kindness back to ourselves-ever gently.

@user-ug3vn5wq5e 5 месяцев назад

Thank you Rabbai; for sharing your views on this sensitive subject often ignored by scholars. The following quote inspires me. “The whole conviction of my life now rests upon the belief that loneliness, far from being a rare and curious phenomenon, peculiar to myself and to a few other solitary men, is the central and inevitable fact of human existence. When we examine the moments, acts, and statements of all kinds of people -- not only the grief and ecstasy of the greatest poets but also the huge unhappiness of the average soul…we find, I think, that they are all suffering from the same thing. The final cause of their complaint is loneliness.” ― Thomas Wolfe, God's Lonely Man

@susanwoodcarver 5 месяцев назад

Thank you.

@BaraSchmidt 5 месяцев назад

To find oneself can be a lifelong journey. I love your soul-driven approach, Rabbi Jacobson! When you develop, nurture your sense of self at the soul level it becomes unshakable and opens you up for so much more. You more easily find deeper meanings in all areas of your life. Your content - everywhere it's offered - continues to positively enrich and grow my life experiences! “You are only free when you realize you belong no place-you belong every place-no place at all. The price is high. The reward is great,” - Maya Angelou

@user-pu7yl5py1u 5 месяцев назад

Yes, I felt abandoned during my formative years.

@yashpatel261 5 месяцев назад

I am alone since i was young. I realized i am stronger this way but i need to change.

@donnamarsh3474 5 месяцев назад

I read a book called the Primal Wound that helped very much with this. I was adopted.

@mercedespombo5768 5 месяцев назад

Thank you. Yes sometimes you get hurt by the people you love the most.. all blessings.. Ion Tov Rabbi

@MichelleSchneidmann-no2gl 5 месяцев назад

I was abandoned at birth and thank god I was adopted by 2 holocaust survivers. Got married , my ex husband had a mistress he asked me if I would fight for him and I told him no. Last year in June I was somewhere and had a stroke in the eyes. My children are in Israël and grandchildren also. I left a world of secular ✡️ and want to be religious am not bitter but I will not take a job to work on Shabbat. BUT IT IS TRUE NOT GOOD FOR A PERSON TO BE ALONE. HAVING ONLY JEWISH FRIDAYS BUT NOT RELIGIOUS l really fiiend myself between two worlds. God willing I will find way. You have no idea how much you bring emotionally to me not affected me got raised by jewish parents became jewish

@ez2u1 3 месяца назад

I don’t know if there is healing on this earth for all the abandon issues sexual and physical abuse I have suffer through… I still wanted to have life…. I chose life. Than my children (two) died one fell 70 ft off a cliff the other an asthma attack. Most days I fill like an empty shell. My wish is I would like to have someone that cared about putting something into my life. Even at 70 I need someone to care about me. Someone to nourish my soul.

@janette6993 5 месяцев назад

Rabbi, my son and I become estranged when ex-husband re-entered his life when he turned 18. I thought we had a great mother son relationship. However after spending time with ex husband my son heard his resentment against me. Untrue things, hurtful. My son has totally abandoned me for 20 years. I keep in touch with letters texts etc. First time he replied was when I offered him family photos. But he made it clear he wants nothing else.😢

@akai.christo 5 месяцев назад

Thank you Rabbi Jacobson!! 🔯🙏❤☀ Wish you and all here a wonderful day!! ✌😉✌

@giuseppedantzelo2531 5 месяцев назад

Thank you Rabbi! You are amazing. May HaShem bless you and your family.

@user-pu7yl5py1u 5 месяцев назад

Yes, that's true.

@shadnunemaker5869 5 месяцев назад

I know when I was born I came out screaming!

@TalieKellman 5 месяцев назад

As always, so deep and profound. I've experienced repeated cycles of abandonment my whole life, it does become a self-fulfilling prophesy when you experienced emotional abandonment as a child. When you look for signs of abandonment, you will surely find it and it can become a vicious cycle. I've learned to rely on myself over the years, but that's not true healing. Luckily i do have a few friends in this life who support value and encourage me and I've put distance between me and those who don't... but the soul connection is the missing piece. Thanks for your wisdom and your encouragement, it is palpable.

@susanwoodcarver 5 месяцев назад

Thank you. You are the first Rabbi I have ever heard. Your words and thoughts are wonderful. I like and appreciate you. Blessings, and hugs.

@jonathanlefkowitz3515 5 месяцев назад

Thank you thank you! Such great information about this topic. ❤

@Macboy62 3 месяца назад

From experience I can affirm this is true. It took me decades to work this out. Rabbi Jacobson I wish I could have seen this in my twenties. If this problem is deep it will adversely affect all your close personal relationships.

@lynetterowberry2 5 месяцев назад

Very painful topic. Family units with dysfunctional family dynamics breed siblings all operating from the same point of lack ... it's hard enough finding the innerstanding for oneself while one drama unfolds after another to those around you which has a ripple effect on the entire unit ... the silver lining could possibly be that the experience mirrors G_ds concealment. There are times I feel like I can do anything because G_d is with me ... then I don't feel Him at all 💔 I move in and out of these states ... feels like a roller coaster. I've Finally reached the conclusion that G_d is a decision beyond reason (my ego has given me a hard time with this) and that's what I call Faith ... regardless of what's going on around me I've accepted that I can't give that belief to anyone it can only be acquired through self actualization.💫🙏💜 You Are appreciated Rabbi.🌻🌹 See and You will find. Not seek and they will find.😅

@drrashidashavaktodiwalla589 5 месяцев назад

As always,dear Rabbi what a wonderful topic you chose. Most of us at some point in our lives have felt this sense of abandonment! Thanks for your insight! God bless n may we reach out to one another.❤

@susanflakes6968 5 месяцев назад

Perfect! Thank you! Blessings!

@cynthiacremeans7656 5 месяцев назад

Thank you Rabbi 🙌🕯🙌

@billmcculley9502 4 месяца назад

Thank you. Everything you spoke about I experienced one way or another growing up.

@lindacook8819 5 месяцев назад

I read “Fearfully and wonderfully made” by Phillip Yancey. This book helped me immensely.

@Galuppi728 5 месяцев назад

Christian teacher. What's so amazing about grace. Apostate all the way!!! Causing the church to slip deeper and deeper into accepting the West's Gay-agenda! Thank God I left Christianity after 40years, Oct 2022, when I saw from the weekly Parshah, Deut.32, that the rock of the church is NOT the Rock of Israel. Following Jesus is following the Queen-of-Heaven religion of Nimrod, aka, Mother and child, aka Tamuz & husband-son Dumuzid, and many other aparitions. We need to be so careful of nice-sounding psychology that seems to appease our wounded souls...

@Thewhippedhippie 5 месяцев назад

If you’re ever in Texas, I will fix a great ribeye for the Rabbi! Super blessed! Thank you

@lottagreenmalmqvist7651 5 месяцев назад

Thank you! You got a deep soul ❤

@epus40 5 месяцев назад

Thank You!

@juliasamson5123 5 месяцев назад

Thank you!

@360Jelly 5 месяцев назад

Spot on. Thank you Rabbi 🤍

@Adeleef 5 месяцев назад

You are truly a breath of fresh air 💎

@WeRNthisToGetHer 5 месяцев назад

Thank you so much for this Rabbi. You help to fill in the gap for those of us who feel this way. God bless you. This helped me. ❤🙏

@christinegithinji6328 5 месяцев назад

I really need this teaching today🙏🏽❤️

@denisewalker1120 4 месяца назад

Thank you for your wonderful insight rabbi Jacobson. 😊

@Kerstin2626 5 месяцев назад

You are amazing. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and time.

@carla-tg3bx 5 месяцев назад

Your teachings are so so valuable to me thank you 🙏

@johannaelisabethwiess6267 5 месяцев назад

Todah Rabah Rabbi Jacobson & Family! I listened to your video until the end... It is a question of learning how to teach your soul when dealing with the feeling of abandonement. The spark should come from within. "Everybody needs somebody". Thanks 👍 JW

@rhondasisco-cleveland2665 5 месяцев назад

Spirit crushing is a problem.

@maryw4609 5 месяцев назад

Wow❤❤❤❤❤❤

@user-fw6ne7zz4y 5 месяцев назад

The best words in this moment. Todá rabá

@lindacrist6736 5 месяцев назад

Deuteronomy 31:6

@timmiller7338 5 месяцев назад

It says: "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” , nice verse, thank you, God bless!

@omarmaxwell6971 5 месяцев назад

amen

@susanparker767 5 месяцев назад

✨🙏🏼✨

@bahtiyaruzumcuoglu4744 5 месяцев назад

Tunnels?

@plnbdy 5 месяцев назад

Adore these Rabbis, Jacobson, Friedman, and another i can't find ATM : / I'm taking this response from another posting but it kinda fits.... The other posting was about kids blaming themselves for their parents divorce which itself is the parents abandoning the child's family so..... (Regarding children blaming themselves for their family breaking up......)Only the good ones do that(they're all good for the most part).... The child assumes that everything was perfect between their parents because naturally their parents were good people like they are and their parents were sound in their faith as children are.... so naturally everything must have been okay and hunky dory before.... the child seems to be the thing that causes all the problems.... The child doesn't want to need special status and require extra attention, and care and work and worry and all of that, the child wants everything to be hunky-dory how it was BEFORE them..... Kids will kill themselves in service.... the child feels it all.... and when it's turned up? when people are squabbling over who will take responsibility for this and who will take responsibility for that..(in the BEST case) the child can't fathom that they could possibly be so important as to warrant all of this..... and since they very clearly are CAUSING all of this.......... Naturally it is "all" their.... "Occam" gets "quotes" because here..... A fight I fought.... At this point in the match I'm helping the people up who were squabbling... (Whether they like, WANT or understand it....) ❤🦁✡️🙏🪔

@liliherndz5792 5 месяцев назад

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made 🕊🤍🕊 God says you matter you are worthy of Merciful & unconditional LOVE ..AMEN

@slevy1ster 5 месяцев назад

I only watched this partially but what I did watch I found disturbing. #1) you don't tell a kid that what they are doing is great. If you do, the kid will have nothing to aspire to b/c they will think they are great. Instead, you can tell them that you like their idea or agree that it's a good idea and encourage them to think about how to improve it. #2) Children of divorce do not necessarily blame themselves. A perceptive child who witnesses physical violence such as punching holes in walls or destroying personal property knows which parent is out of control and deserves the blame. Also, it may be incomprehensible for a child to admit that the violent parent who took off actually abandoned them. It can even take decades for someone to admit that the father who split actually abandoned not only their wife but their children, too.

@Galuppi728 5 месяцев назад

It's not quite that simplistic. I wish you'd listen to all before you comment (although, I do it too if I heavily disagree with everything being said), and even realize that even a full video is not everything, coz the subject is very broad. I certainly blamed myself for my parents' divorce, coz a lot of the fights were around us kids; obviously my parents weren't coping! But, not all of them were... many of them were just because of whatever! And it was bad, and there were nasty flashbacks. And the problem is that kids are forced to lie, to take sides, to cope... when, in fact, no one parent is usually all bad, nor any one parent usually all good! It's better to learn to love and accept that they're confused and hurting like 99% of the world. They tried their best while striving to also attend to their narcissist drives. And, no, it's not wrong to tell a kid they're doing great - if they are! Just be realistic, and teach them that there are always people better off and worse off than them, and to have empathy for others. If I could do it over again, I'd put my kids in an observant Qibbutz to have Jewish people raise them;, as was the case in the 1940's onward, where parents worked the farms & saw their kids a few hours a day; good teachers & caregivers who knew how to raise kids beautifully & build the nation!

@rjchiedog 5 месяцев назад

if you have Jesus in your life you will understand it all. and you will never feel abandoned no matter what.

@timmiller7338 5 месяцев назад

Amen, A.D. 2024 A.D. , Happy New Year! Praises for our year, A.D. for A.I. , God's digital stump! Praise chant Gregorian chants!

@Galuppi728 5 месяцев назад

That's a complete lie! Christianity is a farce. I was in it 40 years, and all that happened was: I thought I was healing from my childhood, but only got worse & worse. So glad I discovered from Deut.32 while doing the Parshah in Oct 2022, that the rock of the church & its offshoots is NOT the Rock of Israel!!!