PLEASE LISTEN TO SHERA! My aunt helped my uncle pay for and build up a brand new mansion back in their home country. He allowed the women he cheated with to live there for FREE. Then he left her for good and moved in a young woman and gave her the lifestyle that my aunt should have had. Don’t do it ladies. Wait, be patient, and manifest the life you want.
This happens to me. When I was 20 years old I took in a homeless man who was 40. NOw that he’s no longer homeless and has a nice job getting paid more money than even me he gives all of his money to his mom. I said what about me? he said “did u push me out of your coochie?” This is what I get for building a man who was homeless. When he was homesless sleeping on the streets his mother was living it big in her big house with her boyfriend while her child was sleeping on benches and hospitals.
My mom married my father at 21 and had me at 22. Worked a full time job, gave birth to 2 more children, he cheated their entire 20+ year marriage, he built his career and himself off her back and misery. Only to divorce her, have a baby with a woman close to my age buy a house for her and her 2 other children by another man. He's still leveling up and securing that family while my mom still struggles financially. DO NOT BUILD A MAN EVEERRRRRRRRRR
Women today shame other women who like to be spoiled by their men. They feel the woman should be out working her career, buying her own dinner, clothes, house etc. With so many women now a days pushing that Independent Woman most men today feel like they don’t have to put in any work to court a woman more less spoil her.
A lot of these women scream they are independent and don’t need anything from a man or how proud they are to be the breadwinners of their marriages/relationships, in reality it sucks. These women receive gifts from their man/husband and they know off the back he used her money to buy it. These women can’t completely feel feminine with having a man that barely pulls his weight. A lot of them like being breadwinners and being pick me chicks but in reality those women are tired, worn out, stressed maybe even depressed, getting cheated on with other women who don’t have to lift a finger.
Pretty Glowin This is exactly how I keep my sanity as well lol this is the only place I can come to and like minded women think just like me when it comes to men. When I speak this language around friends they think I’m trippin for wanting a man who takes care of me. They always remind me how it isn’t the 1950s anymore and women should be out taking care of themselves without a mans assistance. That mind set alone has a lot of men thinking women should come 100% to the relationship and he doesn’t have to do much but bring his 1/3, 50%. So that leaves less room for him to spoil you. If a man isn’t going 100% for you, I feel he doesn’t truly love you. If he goes 50/50 then that means he loves you as long as you can provide lol
Laura Croft EXACTLY. Why pay half the bills just to come home and take care of the whole house the kids and you know he’ll expect sex at the end of the day. What woman really wants to give up sex to a man she’s having to play roommate with after doing all the work. That’s why a lot of these pick me’s end up in divorce or their man leaves. They do all this building their man up and most likely don’t want to give him sex at the end of the day from doing all the work for him. He’ll eventually cheat, she’ll find out. Either she will leave/take his half and level up or continue to turn a blind eye to his shenanigans and still pay 50/50.
Sorry but she's right. Every guy I date I make it a point to let the next guy know how much the previous guy adored and spoiled me. It never fails the new guy will bend over backwards to treat me better than the last guy
DON’T do 50/50!!! (I commented this on another video) I was married at 21. He was 23. He paid my rent for a while. Then we moved together & we split the bills 50/50. Now, 10 years later I am the sole provider & have been for years!!!! Do not fall for it! Idc how “good” he is!! I learned my lesson!! I’m leaving his ass in roughly 2 weeks.
blair zhang 😂😂 ok with the quarantine he is here because I need help with the kids (4 young children) but he does know I want to leave. He will be leaving again once school and daycares open back up. But for my own sanity he is here because I can’t deal with these children by myself 🤦🏾♀️
@@ee6255 Girl you need his help ... You think you do. Better to rely on yourself or family members than to give him box and an excuse to live in your house bill free
When I was 19 I dated a man that was 40 and he used to spoil me . If I ever bought the least expensive thing for myself he would actually get annoyed and replace that money . Said it made him feel like less of a man . Every minute he’d ask “what do you need?”Literally pushing stuff on me . Real men actually want to spoil you , it makes them feel masculine. I always had to look good though. If I ever showed up without a manicure / my hair not done (long hair) he would ask me to go and do it and then call him later . Also I had to maintain the same figure he met me with. The least increase in weight , he’d say “please you’re gaining weight, check that”. Like shera said , just look good .
Nina Lovely Same here. I’m bossing the hell up! I already have the nice whip and nice neighborhood, so I don’t have time for dusties or dusty mentalities.
She is talking real talk. I don’t agree with every single thing but if you want to focus on you and heal from toxic men and have a little fun in your life to build a self respect foundation listen to this woman. I wish I heard this years ago. I didn’t learn til I was 32. I was a doormat for too long. Listen to her 💯
I wish I knew all that when I was younger and had everything to be desired. What happen to older women, what are they suppose to do? If they feel they still got it
this is so true. My aunt had just received her MBA and was working in a big firm. Then she met this guy who was in his second year MBA and she fell in love with him and even got him a position higher than her's so that he would feel like the man in the relationship. WELL, six years after they marry, they have two daughters and he leaves her for a 20 year old college student. He buys her a Range Rover and gets her a loft in the city. My aunt almost went crazy. She's 46 now with two kids and not married.
And this is exactly why Shera says do not ever build with a man. Be the woman he brings his best to, not the woman who helped him build just so he can take his best and give it to another woman
True! They will ask you to be their girlfriend by the second date, lol. Let them know what you require to become a girlfriend... bills paid, shopping, dates, trips, etc. If you look good enough, most men will agree to your terms!
Exactly, I was a 50/50 i bought 3 cars, a house thought him all about credit cards, banks and even started a mobile home renting side business. Well thr chicks would think he was THE man little did they know everything was under my name. He ended up bringing a chick to my house and got caught redhanded by me. Soooo i learned my lesson. I will not ever invest or do 50/50.
if a woman can do all this while the man is looking, he aint a man to me i cant respect a an..cos the mascuine m be gone. ima talk trash at him every turn
Well would you help build up a woman? I’m isnoried by your hustle and I’d love some tips from you! I’m young and want to be finically successful like you! I’m sorry that guy took advantage of your help and guidance
I’m so sorry!! I did the same thing hoping he would one day want to do better. I hate that happened to you. We only fk with protector provider types now.
I did this with a friend. I gave her a bebe skirt and she gave me a sample size of hand lotion. I was pissed. I had her give me another gift. Then I stopped talking to her.
Ladies, trust me. It’s time to wise up. I believe what Shera is preaching is simple self-worth. Know your worth ladies, this is not about a dollar value but about having standards. Don’t be so needy to allow a man to walk all over you only to be left broken and broke in the end. Level up your life FAST. If you’re 30 and up speed up your level up I’m do it ASAP. Whatever vision you have of your level up- go higher-create the ultimate version of you- the version that would intimidate your current self. I have an aunt who helped her husband build a house, purchase land and even start a business. She never enjoyed the house because he moved his mistress in there- banned her children from previous relationship from even visiting the house. He then sold it without telling her. When he got sick she funded his medical bills, and helped care for him when he was in need- she allowed him to move back in- he left as soon as he got healthy- she waited for him until he died thinking her prayers would bring him back only for some women he married without her knowing to show up during funeral to claim that’s her husband and she wanted any possession he had. He divorced her and remarried and left her looking stupid. She spent her entire life praying and hoping and he reaped all the benefits of her stupidity. Wise up ladies. This is not about being a gold-digger, this is about knowing your value.
Damn My parents been married for twenty years. And last Christmas I watched my mom open her gifts and reject everything lol.. I was like mama why you doing that. Now I get it lol
Wow this works on my husband too, and I didn’t even recognize that I need to continue to do it. I actually would feel bad sometimes, but if he asks me if I like something and I don’t, I’m gonna say no and make a twisted face and shake my head no uncontrollably lol. He just keeps coming back with more gifts, unknowingly begging for a approval. He is always SOOOOO happy when he actually buys something I like. He will bombard me with multiples until I tell him to stop buying it 🤣🤣 the gifts just keep getting better and better!!
@@YourFavoriteRealEstateAgent I gotta get better with saying no or that something doesn’t make me happy when it doesn’t😩😩😩 a people pleaser in recovery
@@Theprincessinyellow I’m a reformed people pleaser too! You can do it. Just start testing and don’t apologize! You will be amazed bc I still am amazed at how Ashera has helped me learned how to EFFECTIVELY deal with my husband, his ego, and ALWAYS getting what I want 😎
Part of the game is triggering a man's sense of fatherly responsibility to provide. Youth is a trigger for a man. You want a guy who could be your father to trigger that response more easily and into the future. Ladies! You need to be retired (independently financially secure) by 45 off his money.
A new girl came to work with us few days ago and she said she don't know how to use the bus etc, and cz she is cute looking, at some point everybody was stressing out to find her solutions, while she was smoking her cigg undisturbed. Shera is soooo right !
My mom died when I was18, and I really wish I had a mentor like you back then. Dated losers because I did not understand Laws of the Universe, and didn’t understand that I make my own destiny. I wanted to take care of people, including my ex. I didn’t understand how to be feminine or look for masculine men.
Wow! This is the exact reason why I broke up with my Ex-boyfriends too! My last one called me spoiled because I demanded more from him and expressed what I wanted clearly!
Same I just wanted him to take me to Applebee's but that was to much for him...i even said I would pay for dinner but he never took me :( but it'sokay I took myself right after I broke up with him
It's TRUE !!! I let my husband know and he wants to do better to please me. I'm a stay at home wife/mom. I made sure not to do no 50/50. Because if I wasn't with him, he still be paying Bill's as a man.
Ooo this is a beautiful look, may you continue to shine. But, you’re absolutely right. I do carry myself high maintenance and people expect that, even my mom so certain things she wouldn’t give me. People treat you the way you carry yourself!
My car is broken. I need a man actually capable willing and able to fix, buy me a new one. Too tired trying to play masculine and feminine roles in life all the way along.
I love listening to your videos, I didn't grow up being spoiled, I was pretty independent at a pretty young age, being the older sister and being motherly etc, so I grew up not being spoiled. This has hurt me, I have been an I can do it myself woman, but I am done lol. I want to be spoiled now, I know I deserve it.
Me too but this year I finally woke up and men are showering me with gifts and before that I never wanted gifts because I thought they would feel entitled to my body. Newsflash even if you pay for ur own things they still feel entitled to our bodies
Same! I was definitely living in my masculinity, even went after a masculine career in the IT industry but I’m so done now! I’m ready to be spoiled like I deserve 🙌🏾💅🏾💅🏾
Crazy thing is….I come from a low income household and have ALWAYS been spoiled I am the youngest girl in my family.Currently I’m dating and older gentleman and he recently just asked me to be his girlfriend.Hopefully in the next couple of years I’ll get a ring! Oh and he bought me a car for Valentine’s Day since I wrecked mine💜 it’s definitely a mindset thing more than anything.I’ve been spoiled my whole life and I’m just now figuring it out.lol
The key is to be willing to “Risk it All”. I used to have issues with this, but now I am so comfortable with walking away if it doesn’t match with what I’m aiming for. 🔑
This thinner eye-liner and almost no eyeliner look is definitely more elegant and suits you the best. It makes you look younger. Even though, you already look like you're still in your 20's.
Whoa you are definitely not lying when you said that men put out there stating what they are used to. My ex claimed he was used to his ex taking his shoes off for him and waking at at 3/4 or even 5 am when he came after home after the “club” to cook for him. His ugly ass wore my ass out.
I’m only 18 and I love your channel ! ❤️ I lost my femininity around 14/15 because of my masculine mother. She never taught me any other this, I appreciate you 💘.
I wasn't raised like this, far from it, but I wished I was. I've seen this happened, and it works. Men need jobs, and women need someone to do it for them says Dr. Gray who wrote Mars Venus books. Good stuff! Keep up the good work cause we need this.
Yes, PLEASE do a Your-Own-$tash video. We, as women (wives, especially) need reminders, especially the up-and-coming princesses. They are walking blind today. - SheRa, I am a new subbie to your channel. I am old school and put these things to practice way back in the Nineties. Young bucks are not the ticket. I am now married of 15 years and I STILL put these to practice. I have my own business, as he does, but the way of life is just me. I am madly in love with my hubby, but this is what he expects because I was high-maintenence when he married me and he loves all of me. Stop settling, ladies.
I beg to differ Love. I haven’t gone through what your talking about. I’m 51 in a month I turn 52. I’m not over weight nor my skin isn’t horrible. My hair is healthy long and thick. I believe it’s all about the mindset and how you take care of the mind and body.
Looking GOOD 😚 I'm 40 and I dont look crazy either but some of the more mature women just age well naturally. Most do not though . I have never had a problem attracting men with money EVEN when I was overweight . But I dont carry myself like trash either and that makes a huge difference . Blessings to you ☺
A big up to Shera for helping us half asleep women a wake up call, I have been stupid my whole life lost alot felt suicidal im telling you LISTEN to her carefully she is telling you the truth DO NOT FEEL SORRY for a man x
honestly, it's not the advice that makes me feel better/ good it's just going in the comment section seeing women that are actually open-minded and aren't about "all men aren't the same and you shouldn't be with a guy just for his money🙄😤". like it genuinely makes me happy to see that I'm not the only girl tryna be smarter with guys because I'm so used to my friend group being stoopid and falling into the "true love" bs that you see in shows or movie yk
20 years ago, I’d say Shera is wrong. Now that I have lived and gone through so stuffff.. she ain’t wrong about any of what is coming out of her mouth. I’ve been the basic chick, the 50/50 chick.. all I got was cheated on, lied to and then left for broke. I put myself through school and am now doing well on my own. I will never again except a man that can’t give me what I want at it’s best! Thank you Shera!
You're not in a position to ask for that anymore, unfortunately. Too old. There's a 20 y/0 version of you that's more agreeable, tighter, fitter, and cuter. #coldhardfacts
@@wasimdbala349 You're not in a position to talk about what men with money want. Too broke. There is a more successful version of you that's more in abundance, wealthy, affluent, and well-off. #makemoremoney
LOL... I am actually spoiled, so I wouldn't be lying. But, I'm not spoiled to the point of being rotten and nasty. I grew up with parents, who treated me well. And I never have had to really ask for anything from the men that I dated, because they just wanted to give me things.
I'm late as hell to this video but agreed. I grew up extremely spoiled and privileged. 1st class everything. This isn't even a lifestyle anymore, it's a mindset. Once you taste luxury even once you chase that high in everything you do, the people you meet, and the life you create for yourself.
Yup bc you already “act “ spoiled naturally. That’s what she wants us all to do to have those same results. Believe you are what you want and it will attract just that
I have to disagree with the point that certain actions don't work on younger guys that only works on older guys. I had a guy paying my bills for well over a year and he was 10 yrs younger than me
Same here. But he is from a country where it is expected for women to not work...AND hire household help to clean and cook for them WHILE they sit at home lol.
I LOVE this video, sis. This falls under my motto to "Act AS IF". If you act it, you will BE it. Law of attraction. You want to attract someone who recognized how you command (not demand) to be treated. Like, a queen. :) The way you treat and respect yourself, is how you are teaching others to treat you. But, always do so with kindness.**All we as women need to do is Show Up** They need to treat us wonderfully. Not that we can't do it ourselves - make no mistake- But, I let a man be a man. Period And stop worrying about if he 'might stop calling me..' If so, Bye and Next!
.... It did work on my past boyfriend who was young and loved luxury. He wanted to spoil me like crazy. Just drank "waaaay" too much for me to marry him. ;)
I told this to my husband.. (before we started dating)I said “my daddy and uncles spoiled me I was raised around provider types” 🤷🏻♀️ I’m a housewife now. Met husband when he was 35 😂 not rich but generous
Please listen .. I’m 34 and literally did everything for my ex since we were 23… he left in 2020 when we had two daughters was paying for vacations and all this stuff for women.. hell took and filed my kids on his taxes and spent that money on woman.. he was the dust king!! Don’t let your emotions get in the was like I did.. umm and he wasn’t cute either so don’t think ugly doesn’t cheat or leave or is a good man.
Did you know that Bible has verses when God compares Israel to pick me up chick, who dont even take payments for sleeping with others but pays her lovers to sleep with them? I think it is to describe that pick me up chicks even lower than prostitutes at times, because they value themselves so lower than low. In fact things you are teaching - woman to stay in her woman position to be paid for and taken care by man and then as submissive but virtues (saving) wife and not emotional (quarrelsome) wife - is what is praised all over the Bible. Therefore it is a success pattern the way God designed for a good marriage. Modern times corrupted this wisdom by creating generation of identity messed up women and feminized men. And lastly, your saying - expect world to be corrupted and vicious and will not do exceptions because of your desires - is true and biblical as well. "Be wise as serpents and innocent as doves" applies here. as well as a man as a good businessman and provider and not lazy as a dusty man who just hid a coin instead of growing it with interest as other two investors, who got praised by God. God dont like dusty's too!
One thing my mother introduced to me early in life was all nice and expensive things. In high school she used to buy givenchy irresistible for me and j'adore for herself. She used to get facial massages and bring me and my brother's along and we would be very annoyed. Now she is a little older but does not look her age. She takes care of her health and always focuses on quality food and products. Now I'm the same with her and ppl I come across think I'm a little delusional. Well
2:20 What happened to your last relationships: I'm spoiled so a lot of people can't provide the kind of lifestyle that I am used to. 5:25 don't go in there trying to impress them. then stroke his ego. wow you picked a really nice place. you must have read my mind. 12:06 do you want to be my girlfriend? question after 3 dates: well i only date men who do a b and c, ie. pay all my bills. 22:07 a fifty fifty man's thought process on how he starts to stray after a 50-50 relationship. 25:00 easing out of a 50-50 relationship. slowly, over a year. 27:07 you worred about him cheating? tie up all his money
Good thing I don’t even need to act spoilt 😂 I am spoilt! Cooking and cleaning up is not for me. I’m a daddy’s little girl. Everything is done for me. I tried to get a job, I couldn’t even last for a month. I tried to start a hair business online. I ended up looking ugly because of how stressed I was. I think it’s time for me to accept it and get spoilt
So true what you say.....when i was younger I was just like whatever. But when I started to get emotional and fall in love, these guys took advantage of that. They knew i was responsible and it raised their levels not mine. I always thought I would fall in love and lived the fairy tale life we are conditioned to fall for. Wrong. The only thing you do when you help pay those bills is let them spend their money on hoes, dope hoes and strippers. Most of them are not even on your level and have far less than you. All i did was build for the next chick.. When you dip all into his pocket he has no way to go pay to take out someone else. I learned this long ago. However I was always the i love you kind and honest. After years of building and loosing and then having my finances drained to pull some deadass weight. Now I am like hell with this im getting back into the game.
You look younger!!!! Maybe its the red lips but you took my breath away in this one.... Yes mommy.... I take everything you say seriously and I feel like I'm making some sort of progress
I wish you had an online course based on all of the topics you discuss but what I do is watch your videos and make it seem like I'm in school and takes lots of notes and apply them into my journey.
Shera, I ducking love you woman lol, and I know so many others do too. I'm so grateful you post these videos and share this important wisdom with us. Whenever I'm feeling doubtful or don't know what to do, I come look for what you have to say about it and feel peace again with the knowledge you give. From now on, I'm gonna be thinking WWSD what would shera do lmao
I'd rather be that than a struggling broke pro who gives it up for free and still ends up getting cheated on. looking dumb coming out the deal with nothing to show for it but a baby. only men who can't provide complain about their role in life.
right we were put here to be help meets and care for the home not as providers of broke men. that's a role reversal. real men provide for their wives and kids.
i lost my femininity when i was 14 bc i dated a snobby dusty that just wanted to add to my problems. so glad i found u and reclaimed myself. now i’m w a guy (although younger) that never lets me pay anymore (i went 95-5 to 100-0). i feel more confident in the relationship as time goes on cause ik he’s putting all his money/time/effort on me :)
