My only hope is this will reach the right people. Here's my story about addiction to drugs and alcohol. Thank you for allowing me to do this. Love, Mod Sun
122 days sober today. Drinking almost ended my marriage, caused me to die, and also took some of my best friends from me. I watch this video once a month now to try and remember why I'm doing this. Mod, you are one of my biggest inspirations of all time. If you can get sober and stay sober, so can I. Thank you for everything sir!
I posted here a year ago about wanting to make a change. I had another self destructive binge in me, and it finally made me open my eyes. I just celebrated 5 months sober, and it feels great. Love you Mod, stay strong.
We need more people like this, willing to be transparent, willing to give their testimony, willing to be honest about these things that are HARD to talk about and share. 'Preciate you dude.
As a former alcoholic and addict who is now sober....and am in a super lonely/confused phase in my life....I loved this and I’m so grateful that he created and shared it ❤️
I’m hitting 6 years clean from fentanyl this December. It is POSSIBLE. My son gets to be proud of his momma, gets to watch me walk the stage for my bachelors next month, gets to have me there for him mentally and physically when he needs me. We can recover, it is possible, and I am sending all my love to anyone who needs it.
Erin! That is such great news. Awesome job with your sobriety. I hope my two brothers recover one day soon because my heart has been broken for the past 15+ years of watching my brothers on heroin, fentanyl, meth, and anything else they can get their hands on. Your achievements are huge, and I know your son must be so proud of his momma! You are amazing.
I hope you see this. I'm almost 3 years sober now. I saw this video literally on day 1 of sobriety. Watching this again now today, is a burst of sunshine to my soul . This pulled me back again like that first day. The work you've done on yourself is my motivation to stay on track. I wish you nothing but the best. Lots of love. I hope I can hug you one day and say thank you. Thank you for making this video that I can pull up when I'm lonely and questioning myself.
But its fake. Trust me, its Pretty easy to distinguish a real good moment from a fake, drug induced one. Cocaine hangover (for the lack of a better term) was worse than depression for me, one of the reasons i quit Pretty early (thank god).
@@barreldreamz7852 you seem like you have your own issues to work on...espicually for hating on someone who is bettering themselves. Smh, I hope you get better too dude.
dude i’ve never heard anyone talk abt the eating disorder shit w this like one of the main reasons i really think i started doing drugs was bc i thought they’d make me skinnier and that sounds so shallow but like disorders like that really consume your whole brain and i was like 12, thank u for sharing that seriously i’ve always felt so fucking alone in that and one of the reasons it took me so long to get sober was i was TERRIFIED of the weight i’d gain, much respect mod❤️❤️
Same I’ve battled bulimia since I was 15 I’m now 28 and I’ve been in recovery from it for 5 years I absolutely ruined my pancreas between that and being an alcoholic/addict (6 years sober on the 31st this month) the drugs took away the hungry and desire to eat so it all tied in “perfectly” being sober and in recovery for 6 years I’ve only heard 1 person share their story and in include an eating disorder so when I hear/see someone who can relate it is everything I still struggle till this day with being terrified of weight gain it’s a daily battle that never ends I have to stay vigilant
I also am terrified of gaining weight. I was put on a medication for a little while that made me gain some weight but thankfully I stopped taking it. Weight gain causes such depression for me. When I’m heavy that’s 90% what I think about all day.
@@psyfrosity1576 just remember that there’s no reason to feel shame about it. none, i hate that people go thru this because theirs no reason to feel that way luv ❤️ just know you’re not judged. beautiful soul
Sending love your way!! I truly hope you are becoming a better person. Please know you're never alone. Try your best to understand weight is just a number. Who cares. It's about how you feel internally. Don't let the turkeys of the internet get you down love. I Love YOU!!! ❤️
MOD SUN: I feel so lonely and lost right now. - 2019 In 1 year and 5 months, you will release 3 awesome songs called Karma, Bones and Flames. It's a MOVIE. MOD is an example of how you can really turn your life around if you dedicate yourself to your goals.
There is a street with a retirement home on the one side, and a kindergarten on the opposite side. The speed limit is 40 km/h. You speed down that road going 120 km/h and get caught by a law enforcement officer. The next day you are in court trying to defend yourself. You tell the Judge ‘’Im sorry I will never do it again’’ to which he replies ‘’by keeping the law in the future does not make up for breaking it in the past. There is a penalty that needs to be paid. If I let you go now, the penalty will be unpaid and no justice would be served.’’ The penalty he gives you is massive - you cant pay it because you don’t have that kind of money. You go to prison. Later that night, your 1stnight in prison, the warden comes and open your cell door telling you that you are free to go. Someone paid your fine. Will you accept the payment or will you remain in ‘’prison’’? You asked the prison warden ‘’who paid my fine?’’. He says some guy went and sold all he has in order to pay your penalty. You say ‘’cool thanks, I don’t even know the guy’’. What would you do next? 1. Climb into your car and drive down that very street again @ 120 km/h, knowing or assuming this stranger will pay your penalty again because he might have some other stuff to sell to bail you out again? 2. Try and find out who this person is and get to know him and thank him for what he has done. Also not to do what you did that caused you to land up in prison because it cost this person who paid your penalty a lot - He made a massive sacrifice for you. If the fine was $ 100 000 000 and you took out a loan to pay the penalty (hypothetically speaking), you would still be & 100 000 000 in debt. Only someone without debt can pay your debt. Jesus was without sin. Adam and Eve were naked in the garden before eating the forbidden fruit. They did not notice anything strange of their nakedness - to them it was normal. Once they ate of the forbidden fruit, their eyes opened to their sinfulness - they disobeyed God and realized they were naked. ‘’ The woman saw that the tree was good for food and delightful to look at, and that it was desirable for obtaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it; she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. 7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves. ’’ Genesis 3:6-7 The fig leaves they sewed together can also be seen as ‘’self righteous works’’ to cover up their sin - the fig leaves won’t last forever as they will dry out and wither, exposing their nakedness again. God provided proper clothing for them to cover their nakedness properly…….. ‘’The LORD God made clothing from skins for the man and his wife, and he clothed them. ‘’ Genesis 3:21 This is the 1st time anything died / was killed. It was killed so that the skin of the animal could be used as clothing for the 2 naked people instead of them using leaves. During Passover the Jews had to sacrifice a lamb each year to atone for their sins. The lamb had to be spotless and without blemish. Jesus is called THE LAMB OF GOD as He was without sin, YET HE was slaughtered so that his BLOOD could cover our sins. Our good works (fig leaves) wont do. For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift- not from works, so that no one can boast.
@@PVerse-fh4hl god ain’t got shit to do with my recovery, I put in the hard fucking work and looked within myself and did hard fucking work and nothing was easy or gifted by fucking no one but fucking me.
Life is a book. A good book is filled with happy, sad, confusing, even painful, hard to read, chapters. It can make you laugh, cry; It can evoke thoughts, and feelings you have to work through. But, you continue to read the book to the end. Life has this same effect on us. And, just like that good book, you have to always keep going. Why? Because nothing should spoil your happy ending; And you never know, someone else may want to read your book. ♡ Thank you for sharing your story. It opened up a realization into my own life, and I can't thank you enough for that. Keep on, keepin' on!! ✌💚
Just recently found you from your song "flames" with Avril lavigne. I started listening to your music and became a fan. I just discovered this video today. Thank you for this. Thank you for being so humble and showing that even rock stars, celebrities can feel lonely. I just celebrated 4 years clean off of Fentanyl on the 9th of February. Hope your still doing well bro and stay plugged in somewhere. Keep putting out bangers!! 🤘😁🤘
I always liked the taste of most opioids/ opiates unfortunately. well, heroin and oxycodone... I used to always joke that I'd love to turn that into a seasoning flavour. heh. ugh 😕
"Came to Believe" on the wall behind him, right by his head.... There's a saying in AA, "We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"
L. S. AA helped save my life in the beginning but as I’m sure you know, they don’t support any mind altering substances such as weed. It’s a shame really because it’s hugely beneficial in terms of harm reduction/maintenance.
@@mollyfoxxx I agree.I have 23 years clean off drugs, including alcohol,I'm 43 btw.I do smoke though.It is the only thing that helps my pain n my PTSD n anxiety.They don't condone it,so I don't mention it.I don't lie but I still consider myself clean.Many will disagree.But imo,MY OPINION, it's better than pain killers that can literally kill you.Marijuana will NOT!!!!
Molly Nolin I was actually onboard with “anti-weed” when I was first entering the program. It wasn’t until I ended up with my current partner, who uses marijuana for sleep, that I realized it’s entirely different. He can still stay off of every other mind-altering substance he struggles with. It truly is a case-by-case basis and definitely made me question the “die-hard” AA concept.
I don't know much about Modsun as a musician, but I give him major props and mad respect for putting this out and allowing himself to be that raw and emotional. I bet this has already helped so many people and will continue to do so. I like to weigh the cost/benefit of any decision, the positive effects vs. the consequences. I can't see many negative consequences of him sharing this, it's only going to bring positive change
Pray Without Ceasing Hello, I am building a channel based on addiction and helping others with kind words and happiness and positivity every day, in every video, I could use all the support & subscribers I can get to get the message out to people that it is possible to get clean! Check my vid out ❤️
I know this is an older video but still hoping this is seen…I needed to see this, not because I suffer from addiction per sé but because I have difficulty with intimacy and personal connection in my life. I’m a chronic negative Nancy and truly truly have trouble finding positive in myself, body and personality, so anytime I come across your content it’s conveniently when I’m at a low and I sincerely feel my spirits lifted. Thank you for your authenticity, genuinely. LG
You rocked tonight in Calgary. You're personality & energy is awesome. You would definitely make a great friend w a great heart.glad you sobered up. You're a good guy 🖤💚
@@hgs9880 dude you keep commenting this, you can't just whittle down a person's entire personality to "wants to be like cobain", like really?? Cmon my dude, life is not black and white👌x
This kind of honesty is so fucking rare. It takes a lot of strength to be this vulnerable - but there's so many people out there that need to hear that addiction & depression are illnesses, not character flaws. illnesses that they can recover from. I hope you continue to work & heal and create a life you're proud of. Be kind to yourself 💚💚💚
You’re so freakin down to Earth bro, I’ve been sober for months now, and after watching this, I’m gonna consider to just stay straight edge for good now! Thanks for opening up and sharing ModSun! Good luck on your journey and I wish you nothing but the best in your recovery for the years to come! :)
I've watched this video so many times and it still brings me too tears each time. I'm so proud of you mod and I'm so glad you have started a journey. We all have battles and you sharing your journey will help so many others 💚
This is such an honest, raw, accurate portrayal of someone with mad talent that unfortunately became an addict. The negative effects of drugs, how impactful, how completely consuming in everyway drugs are, and how it effects you mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually -to the extreme. The level of denial, excuses, and lies you tell others and yourself, to convince yourself to continue to use, and not get clean. The all consuming pain of it all. Thank you for this mad video! I hope it helps others, and when you need reminding, helps You remember who you want to continue to be! And who you do not, want to ever be again. I hope you continue to work at your sobriety, stay clean, and if you fall -get back up!!! You are truly an inspiration, such a talent, such an amazing soul, such a pro... I look forward to your continued success, now that you are on the right path and sober. Nothing but Love and peace for you man ❤
You’re one of my heroes. Thank you for your transparency. You have a beautiful heart, a beautiful soul, and I am thankful you’re here. Blessings, love.💚
Same here (17 mos)!!! It's definitely a struggle but I am so grateful to have the opportunity to go through this struggle. So many of us dont get this chance. Many of my close friends have lost their lives due to addiction. I'm lucky to have today and remind myself that tomorrow is not promised. Keep going and doing great things! Sending love your way and to all the struggling addicts out there!
I don't know you or Mod personally but I'm so proud of y'all. Thanks for sharing it gives people like us hope and people to look up to. I'm a recovering addict of 8 years and I've been clean for 9 months and going (opiates/heroin). I can't wait to be able to say I'm 2 years clean like you. Stay safe and stay sober, we got this🖤🖤
this videos still saves my life. i watched it the day it came out and im watching it again now. Mod your story is so many peoples story. I suffered from alcohol dependency while i was touring, and it was a toxic cycle. I also suffer from an eating disorder. Cannabis has truly saved my life and im so so so so so happy that you are able to use this amazing medicine and get better. To all the addicts out there please read this. IT GETS BETTER ONLY IF YOU ARE TRULY READY TO CHANGE AND GET BETTER. YOU CAN GET BETTER. YOU MATTER, AND YOUR PRECESNCE IN THE WORLD DOES IN FACT MAKE IT A BETTER PLACE!
problem is, if you get super addicted before you develop a personality (meaning when your still a kid), you dont connect with your higher self, you battle with you mind to create a higher self.
0. .0 the higher self isn’t the “personality” or ego. It’s something that you can always access if you take the time. Were born being our higher selves and the lives we choose either bring us towards or away from it. It’s never to late to turn around
@@DiU-beldwhn Trust me, im not giving up on myself, but i dont understand what you mean. Nobody is born self actualized, this is something that you acquire in life. What im pointing out is that with anything (in this case drugs) you can distract yourself from the pursuit of goals and needs. I'd imagine non addicts brains are wired to mate, feed, acomplish tasks, etc... Its my suspicion that drugs rewired my brain to demotivate and numb. Your brain (assuming your not an addict) sees a problem and thinks i need to find a solution to this. My brain sees a problem, and wants to bail out of reality. (side note, i dont want to come across as a dick, i just want to understand what you're trying to tell me)
Thanks Mod 🖤💚 I suffer with severe depression and alcohol abuse in my family as well… including me. I’m 28 now. Always told myself my drinking wasn’t an issue and I’ve been coping with it now. It has become a big issue. Your message is heard and getting out there as much as you dreamed it would. It’s so hard to talk about and to admit these things. It’s hard to think that you would be happy without these substances. I look back and wonder how I was ever happy in life without alcohol. But really I’m more depressed than ever and don’t know without it. Please know I’m incredibly in awe of you, I found your music on a whim one night and it’s helped me even get through some serious dark times. And then coming across these little talks is just so inspiring. You inspire me. And not only that it’s so clear you have a great support system out there, everyone I have seen talk about you talks so highly. You have a pure soul. I’m glad you’re doing better, we all love you. Thanks for inspiring the world 🌎 💚🖤
I stumbled on you about 3 days ago.. and I have more inspiration and uplifting hope in these 3 days then my 26 years. I needed this recovery story today. 🙏
@@kgbstudio ok so ur ignorant and disrespectful? Is that what I was supposed to take away from ur comment? I'm genuinely confused why u felt tbe need to comment that. u stopped the vid. Ok? but why are you bragging about it like not listening to someone's story is cool?
Came back all these years later to re-listen to your words and gain further insight. Thank you for sharing your journey with THE WORLD!!! That takes a ton of courage. You're Blessed!!! ❤🚀🏆
Kasey Solomon I’m so sorry, but I just gotta ask. Where are you from if that’s not too personal? Lol. Your last name is Ethiopian. So it just seems off because Ethiopians speak “Amharic” I think, and you speak English. Lol. Again, if it’s to personal feel free to not respond. I’m just a very curious being. 😭😂👌🏼
Sergio Alcantara I’m American. When my great grandpa immigrated here from Austria, American policies made him legally change his last name to something biblical before allowing him to live here. So it stuck as Solomon.
Thank you for this. I can’t tell you how much I appreciated it. You seem like a really great person. Keep up the great work on yourself. You are a light to people’s darkness.
The honesty in this video is so incredible. Seriously Mod, thank you for sharing your story ❤ so proud of you and your sobriety. You talk about how lost you were & now it seems you have been found. It's beautiful to see you soaring & enjoying every day of your life & career now! Keep going. Keep living your dreams ❤
"There is a reason why whiskey doesn't taste as good as Kool Aid. Because that shit is gon kill you." Been to hospital 2 times because my body was out of nutrients. Doctors said I'm okay health-wise OVERALL, but the temporary stuff I do to my body can and would kill me. Your heart even if totally healthy, can actually stop if minerals are out of your body. What did I do? Went into a turbo recharge, vitamins, vegetables, fruits, water, etc.. Got some money (more than enough to start a week of alcohol journey again), started over.
Hello all, I am doing my best to create a channel solely based on helping others with addiction and telling my story, IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD FOR PEOPLE WITH LIKE MINDS TO COME SUBSCRIBE AND WATCH MY FIRST VIDEO I MADE YESTERDAY❤️ give me a chance I will upload every other day or every single day with relative videos on how addicts feel and think. Come join me if you wish✌🏼
Impossible says "Im possible" Listen to "Look Up" every day. Think i just about wore the thing out. Mod you have an old soul, shit happens and as long as you learn from it, you can only grow. Thank you for you music and everything you do, but, your purpose isnt done yet. This world needs you Mod.
Your heros, were real and vulnerable in their music, and you are definitely following in their footsteps in the best way. I've only recently got to know your music in the past year, and what I appreciate most is your honesty. You've been through a lot but it's made you an extraordinary human being. Thank you for this, and for sharing your artistry with us all. Light and love
Hang in there Mod♡ I'm a recovering iv heroin & meth addict. I still attend a long term outpatient program but just had 2 years clean on Aug 25th. Sending positive vibes your way! *this too shall pass*
mercyorbit Hello, I am building a channel based on addiction and helping others with kind words and happiness and positivity every day, in every video, I could use all the support & subscribers I can get to get the message out to people that it is possible to get clean! Check my vid out ❤️
For a long time, since I got clean, I have been saying that schools should be getting recovered addicts to give honest talks to kids, and it never happens. The issue is that people are scared of addicts, it’s as if you can catch addiction just by being around us. I think that we have a lot of knowledge to share, and the most important part of prevention is knowledge. People lie to kids and tell them that there is nothing good about drugs, and then kids think on their own “well why do all those addicts do it then?” People are so focused on trying to just tell kids that drugs are bad, nothing good comes from drugs, instead of telling the truth: drugs are like heaven on earth, they make you feel nothing and everything all at once, and it feels amazing, the first few times I did meth it was better than the best orgasm you could ever have - and we need to tell kids that, there’s a reason that people get addicted, we can’t keep lying to kids like that, because then we can tell them the truth - that it feels so good you never want to stop, and it only has to happen once to become an addict. Just like mod said, the second he tried coke he was addicted. That’s all it takes. Sorry for the tangent, but I believe so strongly in the recovered addicts being the forefront of drug prevention with kids,
Proud of you. I’m sure all who personally know you are too! You’ve had such an incredible journey that so many of us can relate to on different levels. Thank you for sharing your story. Huge step ❤️❤️
@@noahsandland1276 Those aren't painkillers you fucking bozo, they're Benzodiazepines AND even more addictive. Know what the fuck you consume before commenting numbnuts.
I went from being dead from fentlyl on Christmas, to having a life again today, thanks to stories like this reminding me why i got clean. So much of your music has gotten me through the last 3 months of being sober, and starting to work again. Its so exhausting and difficult, but without drugs I rediscovered my LOVE for music. Thank you for being apart of my recovery story, just ny sharing yours. Much love
I'm so happy for you, I recently did Therapy sessions for my problems with Alcohol. I'm now finding it repulsive and I feel empowered to be my true self.
I love how transparent you are. Heyyyy I am from Minnesota! Lived here my whole life. I’ve got similar diagnosis as you and never took any meds I was given. You sir are an inspiration. I love you! My husband talks about how he met you at a tech concert and it’s one of his greatest memories. I hope to see you here soon man.
You can literally see the hurt, regret, shame, guilt and utter lost in your eyes. I’ve been through it with so many people. You’re still here on this earth for a reason. Reach out. I’m rooting and praying for you. ❣️ One day at a time. Also.. team front tooth gap 🙌 I hear we’re a special breed.
"codependent on chaos" "I'm unapologetical about the life that I've lived because it is my life but I am apologetic for the sides of my self that I have shown to people" This is video is amazing, and raw and fantastic.
“Usually the people who seem less self conscious are the most” that hit so deep I was in my own rough area of my life doing what I thought to be molly every day (might have been meth or speed) but yeah that’s how I always felt very self conscious like there was this way everyone or in my case every dude was supposed to look or like this idea that “ I was supposed to look a certain way” always felt that so once I started heavily dosing molly I started to say the same shit like “oh it’s making me skinnier” or “oh my jawline seem more prominent” do to my jaw being locked and strained. Final thoughts, you’re doing great I love your new album internet killed the rock star, it’s fire G keep up the progress with the health and music.
Juan gutierrez I almost had to change everything, stay busy, find some new things to distract you, couldnt go to a bar or a show for over a year without being triggered so just eventually had to find new things I like doing, surround yourself with like minded people and go to meetings. I went to two meetings a week for about three years. Now I just go once a month. Even if you don’t want to talk, just hearing people going through similar struggles helps a ton, you can do it
You are doing what 99% of your heroes and idols were not strong enough to do. You are overcoming a charming beast and openly sharing it. This will be powerful for so many people in the scene. A lot of your heroes have lost to it, some have overcome it, but nearly zero have been real. Remember, you can’t own sobriety or success no matter how much money, influence and support you have. You rent it daily. Stay up on the payments. Much love!
Just started getting depressed and thinking about drinking, after a year of being sober, then I came across this possibly caught my attention because mod sun is pretty damn cute, and made me think twice about relapsing
It's so crazy that a man who taught so many people how to love themselves was struggling so much in so many ways. Mod Sun changed my life & I had no idea how difficult his life was. No fans, Just friends. We love you Mod. You're a strong man. Go forward with sobriety and know that you have support all over the world ♡
Honestly, so true if I didn't stay single for as long as I did after trying to get sober I probably wouldn't be here anymore... I had to feel it and go through all the feelings I was always so petrified to feel.
Facts. As a codependent lover myself, I’m forcing myself to stay away from my ex and other people. (Hardest part is really staying away from my ex, I don’t feel attracted to anybody). Gotta feel these mental growing pains to change and become stronger.
Raw Hip Hop , in new sobriety you should aim to be single for at least one year. You can become addicted or co dependent on the other half and if things don’t go well it can risk a relapse.
Just barely heard about mod sun. Have so much respect for him and making this video. Went through those dark situations, and younger pulled my head out of my butt for my kids. I'm still working on not drinking as much, my family cross as responsible adults you recognize.
😭 amazing!! Thank you for your transparency and willingness to share, you are absolutely helping others! 💚💚💚 Praying for continued strength and recovery! 💚💚💚 We love you!
My daughter told me about this & it literally gave me chills! Thank u so much 4 doing this! I hope u continue in ur sobriety & helping others, cause that's ALWAYS a beautiful thing! God bless u Mod sun! 🙏🙏🙏
I’ve lived with my boyfriend for 4yrs. He’s went through addiction. He’s 3 almost 4 years clean. He was at his lowest. This video should be everywhere on RU-vid. Addiction is an epidemic. I really appreciate you doing this man. Good vibes coming your way man, you got this!
currently on this video trying to help my boyfriend out with staying sober, he fell off the wagon frequently. sending love to you and your lover x godspeed
wow, just by reading all the comments I can tell that your story really does help people and it wasn’t for nothing! You’re a strong person with a beautiful heart, You will get through this! Take it one day at a time x
