Air Force Member tried becoming a "HITMAN"..... and Failed 

LOL

We prefer the term independent contractors

Now you tell me!

This. 100% this.

Protip: if they want to meet in person they are the police.

He has milked so many men.

Nice one sir😂😂😂

it will be in prison..

@@AngryCops and he gonna be milking so many more now

Milk milk lemonade round the corner Fudge is made!

Damn, camp bullis... I went through there in January, it was so cold that we had to run into the constantly running showers and soap up, and then build up the courage for another run through to rinse off. Good times.

Maybe his nickname should have been "The Reeker". Silently choking people out with those odiferous green hands.

Chase, as the proprietor of the website, I honestly believe that nobody called him "Reaper" and that he probably did smell of soured Milk. Thanks for clarifying!

Find a kind lady on base to buy this fella a bar of body soap, so long as he hasn't been dishonorably discharged.

​@@fakshen1973 lmfao, that is perfect 😂

Was he SF?

He had to refuse washing to OCPS to cover up the scent for his hitman career

Keeps the wildlife away..

Ayo 😂😂😂

Source be "trust me" around these parts

That's exactly what I was gonna say😂

His score was......2

If I remember right, the lowest score allowed, is a 29, to become a Cook.

I remember zoomies being pretty uppity about their minimum scores being higher.

he at least met the minimum of 55 unless they dropped their standards

The bottom of the website is also hilarious, where they say they are no longer affiliated with Carol Baskin 😂😂

Now it says at the bottom it says "Rent-A-Hitman is no longer affiliated with Diners Club, the Las Vegas Raiders, the Illuminati, Donald Trump, Kyle Rittenhouse, The Island Boys, Vladimir Putin, and OJ Simpson due to contractual restrictions."

"That's no hitman, that's a member of the Tennessee Air National Guard."

This is a test of military bearing, try not to laugh.

But were those heels slamming together, or assholes slamming shut?

"The army National Gaaaaaaaurd, YOU CAN!.... Try and become a Hitman."

They did everything but tell him they where feds. First time I have heard of feebs not entrapping someone.

Well he had the wrong hue.. otherwise they make/let it happen

​@@Stephen85I suppose it's possible upon realizing his level of incompetence(address and phone number and all that) they just wanted an airtight case. But I'm not entirely sure even if they said "just so you know we could be Feds" he wouldn't have laughed it off and said yes anyway.

@@VioletDeathRei I can just see the agents laughing their butts off at the responses this guy was sending.

They trying not to ruin this idiots career and life, but being a dummy don't make you smart smh

They've really been killing it.

Almost as bad as the NAVY....HI GUYS....

@@jracee1

@@who346 Keep seamen out of your mouth.

Better than the Navy Drag queen recruitment. Air National Guard, see, any dumb ass can make it.

lol. Why would anyone even send in an application though? If they know it's a parody website, then why would anyone bother? So I would guess that anyone sending in an application is some kind of idiot that thinks it's a real website. (Unless there's some obvious jokes in there that make them think the application was sent in as a joke).

​@@deucedeuce1572you typed all that as if kids dont do stupid shit on the internet 😅

@@dokwalk True

McChode: "Will that be paper, plastic or 556?"

You mean it's NOT like applying to be a bag boy at Winn-Dixie? Because I was also going to put my 3 1/2 months experience as a barista at Starbucks on my resume as well.

These idiots vote.

​@@elwoodcope7152 LOL!!!! IT was insane!

It’s not an FBI sting site, it’s a joke website

@@ninjaked1265 Can vouch it's a private website.

Yeah... and HIPPA and not like the real one called HIPAA. They did spell HIPAA right, but then the "Hitman Information Privacy and Protection Act" is HIPPA and not HIPAA.

Thanks, we're glad you enjoyed it!

@@Guido_RAHmate, you’ve made a beautiful shitpost. Well done.

Same. I may have made some stupid mistakes in my life, but at least I know I'll never be this idiot.

It is one of the best movies ever filmed.

And one of the best protagonists ever. "there are no cool women leads and proganists" That's because lazy writers exist in today's day and age. Love the first two movies so much.

She is an American hero. Showing that women (she's so beautiful)can kill monsters and save little kids when the chips are down. I knew she would save Newt when she invented the flamethrower pulse rifle. I still get goosebumps from that documentary......

Ripley was always a bad ass. Captain Marvel or Kill Bill ain't shit in comparison.

@Kane Smith Literally duct taped a flamethrower to an assault rifle, with a grenade launcher, and said, "Fuck it, I'll it do myself." And, by the by, 16 minutes until the entire place explodes. *THIS* is you do a strong female lead in an action flick.

😂

Actually Mississippi guys are swamp masters. Gators, moccasins an guns

It's *never* a war crime the *first* time. :D

The ol' 155 ABCT Mothaflippin Dixie Thunder from down under

GO GUARD!!!

funny thing is, some people don't even know they exist

To the skyyyyyy

It is basically a Fed Site, Lol. They contact law enforcement all around the world when you submit a contract. It started out as a Tech Site and he realized how many people searched up “Hitman” and realized what he could do.

It’s like when at a Klan meeting its just a bunch of black people “undercover” and they all get really angry at each other

Feds stinging feds. You're under arrest for hiring a hitman! No, YOU'RE under arrest for conspiracy to become a hitman! [insert spiderman pointing meme here]

@@JH-wd6dp Wouldn't be the first time. Heard stories about undercover feds posed as drug dealers get in a nitpick fight with feds undercover as customers, so deep in the trenches they don't even know who's who

@@JH-wd6dp That would be hilarious. Reminds me of a story where the police was called on a drugs house. In the end, it turned out the house was a training building for the fire department.

No accident there, just petty trolling.

Deep web is where you go for all illegal things.

Sometimes its both

Not always. Feel free to give me a call for services. Sincerly yours, Mr. Totally not a Fed

Google says ANG is a federal military force, apparently. So it looks like we've hit that magic moment in time where BOTH parties are feds. It's like the spiderman meme, IRL.

I'm sure hits get ordered, but they are done within criminal organizations and street gangs. They don't use an unknown hitter.

Girlfriend ???? Picture that dependapotomuss 🙄

Being too sheltered in his mom's basement isn't the miracle here.

​@@JSp4wN Yeah, J is right our society has gone to extreme lengths to ensure EVERYONE survives no matter what...

The National Guard must have really low standards.

That's what happens when we have warning labels on everything, things don't darwin themselves out of existence anymore

@@jaxsazerac4904 The military as a whole is really hurting for recruits right now. I guess this is what you get when you kick out 1/4-1/3 of your entire force, and then you lower standards to try and replace all those people you kicked out 🤷🏽‍♂️

"I joined for the free boots."

"Chicks in New York are paying top dollar for this stuff."

It was over 40 when I went in!

I scored 96 on the ASVAB and signed a contract as an Operations Specialist ( Radarman) in the US Navy . My ' A ' School ( Tech school ) was 17 weeks long at Fleet Combat Training Center Atlantic at Dam Neck Virginia . I sailed on a Guided Missile Destroyer for four years and reenlisted for shore duty as a US Navy Military Policeman . I graduated from the USAF Military Police Academy at Lackland AFB in San Antonio , Texas . My Military Police duty station was CFAY Security Yokosuka, Japan guarding the Headquarters of the US Navy's 7th Fleet . After that I graduated the AEGIS Combat System school on the NASA base Wallops Island , Virginia . I then sailed on a Ticonderoga class Guided Missile Cruiser as a Watch Supervisor . I never thought that I was probably twice as smart as the Airmen that I trained beside , but there were some clues . One time during a training event the Airmen got blown up by a booby trap because they finger fucked around in a supposedly rigged building . I took off my radio , sneaked around inside and touched nothing . Two AF Instructors asked me what was my regular Navy job . I told them that I was a radar operator . They said it made sense sense I was a trained observer who used my eyes as weapons rather that grabbing shit with my hands . I said Yeah , we have Navy EODs for that .

@@victorwaddell6530 cool story bro. 😐

He wasn't a black lesbian.

FBI is probably like "I love this website! Does our hard part for us!"

WOW!!! Literacy is a real problem in this Country! LOL

I wanna send in a joke application now but I also don't want to get swarmed by the FBI

@@wisemankugelmemicus1701 DON'T BE THE REASON FOR A MONDAY SAFETY BRIEF DAMNIT

@@killasjanitor😂Legit I'm gonna wait for the heat to cool down at least

link?

@@budguy21 just go look up rent a hitman

True story!

Wow. That's insane. You always expect one or maybe a couple that are that stupid and that evil... but 200 a month is just insane (even if it was world wide). If he has to deal with them that often, does he report all of them to the FBI too?

@@deucedeuce1572 - Not all of the Service Requests are credible, verifiable, or contain enough information to do anything with. These are considered "not actionable" and are archived as such, The flip side of the coin is the 8% that ultimately do meet the criteria and get reported. These are handled in a variety of ways depending on the situation and not all of them are what they appear, some are cries for help from victims of child/sexual/spousal abuse.

@@Guido_RAH Pretty crazy to go to a hitman website... but I can see why a child victim of sexual abuse would want to kill a specific person/persons.

@@deucedeuce1572 It's pretty common when the victim feels that justice isn't being served. It puts a lot of pressure on an agency to do its job when a significant threat is brought to light.

Bruh i nearly forgot about that trainwreck worth of a netflix series

The daytime beach landing in white t-shirts...high speeddddddd alll draggggg

Donut did video awhile ago where the suspect had the bullets loaded backwards in the magazine. So there's at least one.

I remember that, I was in tears from all the laughter!!!

@RCoady I legit had a history teacher in high school who claimed German sharpshooters in WW1 used to load their bullets in backwards to shoot through armour plate...naturally I was utterly dumbstruck and I told my dad this who was in the RAF and he laughed for a solid fifteen minutes.

@@WhiteIkiryo-yt2it Yeah, there's an old urban legend about loading the actual projectile into the casing backwards. It's dumb and hilarious....

@@WhiteIkiryo-yt2it Germans soldiers did do that. They added more powder to the standard 7.92mm Mauser round and reversed the projectile. It was crap shoot whether or not it would explode when fired, but the rounds that did fire were effective against early tanks. That's probably what your teacher was talking about.

Go ahead and try - our skilled Intake Operatives can easily handle any Sponge Bob or Quandale Dingle submissions. Thanks for aksing!

There was one in WA some years back, where a husband hired a hit man to kill his middle-aged wife. Guy hid and hit her in the head with a hammer, so she choked him to death bare-handed, and then the cops found her husband's number in his backback.

@@jackiebiskan4748 crazy enough for both to be true.

@@jreese46 Poor hitman got hired to take out the fucking Terminator.

@@jackiebiskan4748 Not seeing it. Can you point me in the right direction? Most recent headlines I'm seeing all center on husband dying in prison and police commending her for fighting off hitman.

@@jreese46 im sorry i was doing a little trolling hope you didnt go to deep in this rabbit hole

You don't have to be dumb to be in the Army either, but you do seem to cover the odds.

@@snakerstran9101 don't say that in front of his jump boots. He'll start calling us legs and then we'll have to listen his knees.

Keep in mind Air National Guard isnt the Airforce. Thats like calling the Army National Gaurd the Army.

​@@ArmaGuyz Nasty Girls...

At least the leaker put out important information that the government has been lying about. This idiot... jaw drop.

Maybe all the intelligent people were moved to the Space Force.

I disagree. If you are wrong stay wrong.

Pvt. Joker taught us the DI will smoke the pvt. harder if he reverses himself. Lessons learned.

Well, are you an NCO in the Air Force? If not, then that drastically reduces the odds of this type of phone call.

True story

Dude, RULE number 1! NEVER OPEN a fridge! Only rookies do that sh&t. 🤢

Ew I hope this isn’t the pig section of the comment section.

How oddly specific but understandable.

That's like opening coolers in abandoned cars in the summer. 🤮

Oh God I can still smell that from abandoned apartments I had to clean out.

Imagine this: When he gets to the clink they put him in a double. He looks at his cell mate and the first thing he says is "There can be only one :|" and promptly gets stomped because it turned out he was bunked with an actual hitman.

@@NTAD He got surprised by that website. Now he gonna get the surprise butt sex.

I just sung this. Checks out 😂

Queens and the opening of Highlander series.

@@somsengphrachanh2117 princes of the universe

I'm glad you can find something to laugh about in the VA. It beats guessing the grades the doctor got in med school who is about to work on you.

Good

@@mikehenthorn1778 ...or what country they came from..." Can I get a translator please!" LoL!

Exactly, and I can see him driving the old dark blue ford econoline van down the flightline with "Free Candy" scribbled on it, like it should be, when left near maintainers. :D

I was active duty USAF Security Police for ten years 1987-1997, and this guy embarrassed me. How far my beloved Security Police have fallen. Although I didn't see his function badge of SP badge in the photos.

He’s guard…not Air Force

@@earlwyss520 a.f. security force in the 80.s were some bad ass hombres

@@azking420 The AIR National Guard IS a part of the Air Force lmao

I started Tennessee Army Natl' Guard and crossed over to the Navy. I was an HM in the Navy. I got some of the best duty stations. Corpsmen go everywhere. I sear were like cockroaches. I know I'm a little crazy but I ain't stupid. This guy has some issues they don't make pills for.

Which is odd because from my friends experience the Air Force Recuriter was the biggest pain in the ass to get through

@@2012sonora as one of those enlisted kids, I did get away with quite a bit of stupid bullshit, but if ya succeed 99 times and fail once, no one remembers the 99 successes

...and most get caught eventually (usually immediately after their first hit) ... which is how they know they have low IQ's. It's not surprising, because most violent criminals have low IQ's. There are some that have several kills... but that's not very common at all (as far as I know). Then again, if a hitman is really a good hitman, he is entirely unknown, because nobody would know his victims were murdered, but would think that they all died naturally.

He's Air Force Security Forces (military police)...that's just another regular weekend for some of us.

* spit take *

Right?? Lol they were harassing him and his family for months!