Anxiety Prevents Me From Making Friends (What Can I Do?)

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Anxiety Prevents Me From Making Friends (What Can I Do?)
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16 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 71

@mitchnerjosh Год назад

Totally understand where this dude coming from. I have terrible social anxiety. Definitely needed to hear this.

@foedeer Год назад

*hugs* ❤

@SaystheTruth3 Год назад

This poor guy... I just wanna give a huge hug... 💕

@butwhyshouldi Год назад

My social anxiety: 1. I'm afraid of someone turning me down. (I had a very close friend who would never come over when I would invite her. It hurt my feelings because I never turn her plans down. She took me in and treated me like family up until it came to my ideas she would be almost disgusted by them. But she was also someone who unfriended me later on with no explanation so that revealed a lot about the toxicity of it all. Not only her, but others would fire down any ideas I pitched which led to me giving up on initiating anything ever again.) 2. I feel like I'm boring. (A lot of social situations I find myself not feeling as animated as my peers, my conversation content seems not interesting enough because I get talked over or ppl start txting or distracted by other things. Or maybe I'm just too slow to speak my mind.) 3. I'm naturally an introvert who wishes to be a little more extroverted, but doesn't want the work it takes to maintain a friendship. (In other words, I'm very unrealistic when it comes to friendships. I want it to be easy. But when I think about having to put in the effort to make plans, txt ppl back, etc. not only do I fear it but it becomes this daunting chore that I avoid. Which ironically turns me into the exact type of friend that plagues my existence, one that makes me feel like I'm not interesting enough. I hate when ppl try to hang out with me and i avoid them not because i don't like them but because I'm overwhelmed by the idea. They probably feel the same exact way I feel when my friends avoided me.☹️ it's a never ending cycle)

@sunshine3914 Год назад

May whenever you realize that we’re all just imperfect humans… “viruses with shoes”, you’ll stop overthinking things & live a little.

@__jrod3 Год назад

As someone who had crippling, social anxiety, I can tell you firsthand the absolute best thing you can do is get one on one therapy. This made me not only regain my confidence, but I have more than I can possibly know was possible.

@casspower Год назад

Avery! I am like this too 33 and I struggle in all relationships. Something I am really really trying to work on because John is so right. The stress will kill me. The loneliness will kill me. You’re not alone! We can do this. If I was anywhere near you I would love to grab a cup of coffee and get through this one conversation at a time. Good luck to you and God bless!

@mycojay1oninstagram448 Год назад

👆👆👆👆🍄🍄 he got some good stuffs in the bag. Microdosing has helped me quite heroine. It has majorly helped with my depression and I microdose twice a month now just to keep me level. Already got my order for today and he ships fast too

@matw20519 Год назад

Calling it out immediately is underrated 😂 even in interviews I tell them I’m nervous!

@WetNosesHappyTails Год назад

This is 100% ME. It's really hard.

@Joshmarmolejo_ Год назад

I love when he calls like this.

@games68775 Год назад

For me, dialing into the feelings of resistance and anxiety with interactions and then exploring them instead of pushing them down or distracting myself from them helped a lot. You can try to desensitize yourself from interactions, but that's a temporary fix to an internal issue rooted in maladaptive self-beliefs, perspectives, etc. Dialing into them, seeing them in a non judgmental way, and letting go of them overtime is where lasting change is found (which means accepting them, letting the feelings exist and run their course, and letting them go instead of ruminating) , in tandem with actually pushing past the fear. After dealing with the internal aspects, the resistance I feel to interactions is way way less and actually surmountable, I'm able to be myself authentically.

@theowl2044 Год назад

If they won’t be your friends just because you have social anxiety, they’re not worthy of friendship in the first place.

@joeriveracomedy Год назад

After many months of ending an engagement I started reaching out to people recentlt to be social again. It takes effort. Gotta do it.

@Nrivera86 5 месяцев назад

This really helps. Thanks Dr John

@adnaaar6782 Год назад

One on one give me anxiety. I’m fine with a group of people and I can have fun but if it’s one on one I feel awkward and anxious. I guess I don’t wanna get personal or close because of some things in my childhood

@a.g.g9995 Год назад

Friends are a hassle

@ForAncientKingAndElvishLord Год назад

Wow I realized I've gone through trauma after watching this. I have this guy's problem and I was raised in s somewhat similar household. I love dr John's show. It's so informative. And the things he said about anxiety gave me a little hope. I have to face my fears.

@keithy5020 Год назад

Really appreciate this video. Needed to hear it.

@daviddahl83 Год назад

The answer is: cope and suffer nobody cares. I've had debilitating anxiety for 20 years, can't leave home unless I find someone understanding and supporting to go with and make me feel secure. But there is nobody. Everyone only judges, ridicules, insults, uses, neglects and abandons.

@thugnastykathy Год назад

don’t think this, we’re out there I promise! don’t settle & if you’re comfortable being alone then great! that’s the key

@mtndew616 Год назад

this isnt true! there are people who will support u you just have to find those supportive people.. I know its a struggle because I am going through the same thing

@daviddahl83 Год назад

Maybe you can find someone. I've never been sincerely cared about my entire life.

@dexie135 22 дня назад

Some people will be care for you, but you need to open yourself first, it means you will receive people that will hurt you, but also that will save you. It part of the risk you should accept

@PureLace Год назад

I have social anxiety, always have. I'm also a hermit who would rather be home than anywhere out in public. I truly don't care to go out and see anyone, people are fake, conversations aren't real and people are just awful. I have a hard time thinking of anyone in my small town who would actually be nice to socialize with or anyone I would want to even associate with. As much as we need to socialize and connect, I don't feel like the options I have are worth the time or energy. My energy drains real quick when I'm around people so it's a precious thing to give to those who don't deserve it. 😕

@casspower Год назад

I feel this! At the same time I know if I’m an honest and good person there have to be others like me. It’s not about letting everyone in. It’s about finding a few that will love you and care for you. I think we all need a little bit of community every now and then. Definitely respect your position.

@thugnastykathy Год назад

I always say go where you’re wanted & appreciated, you’ll find your tribe. don’t settle for less! we’re out there!

@ForAncientKingAndElvishLord Год назад

I don't know how much older are you but I'm 28 and I used to think like you. Let me tell you, it's not about talking to someone who deserves to be talked to. It's just simple socializing and you should take advantage of that to avoid boredom. You don't want to be anyone's bff so it doesn't matter if they're worthy of your love or something. It's just a hang out. Now I'm not telling you to go socialize with awful people. I'm just saying just take it easy and think of it as passing time

@girlygirl1890 Год назад

@@thugnastykathy yes, go where you are wanted and appreciated...as long as it is a Healthy tribe, who's living with good morals and are doing the right things. As soon as you witness the wrong morals, go the other direction and stay away!

@sarahalderman3126 Год назад

I agree. It isn’t worth it.

@vincentgarcia468 Месяц назад

I get what he’s going through, I get social anxiety as well. But it’s crazy though, if I’m walking around at the mall, airport or whatever like that as long as I’m moving I’m fine. But when it comes to a work conference and a ton of people are sitting and I’m sitting, I can’t deal with it. Got to listen to soft music like jazz and classical music

@Foxie635 10 месяцев назад

Hard to make friends in America when everyone is so clicky. Go to the bar, people go out together as a group and all they do is stick to the group. They don't expand out. You could sit or stand next to someone and unless you are HOT, no ones says hi to you or even bother to start any conversation with you just to converse. Really crazy in America. Then we wonder why most people are on antidepressants when friends leave or move on with their lives.

@ithinkigottalent4047 Год назад

Awesome call!

@willyfisterbottom6246 Год назад

I had a rough upbringing and had terrible anxiety. When I would go out I would just sit and be very quiet. I eventually started asking the question “why do I feel like I’m not equals with people?” I know I’m a pretty decent person, not perfect, but no one is. I deserve the good things too. It took practice and you still get hurt occasionally but you can’t stop... and it changed my life.

@Nitro91 Год назад

I don't have many friends now because most people only want to be your friend if it benefits them. I've learned to cut people off and it's nice haha

@sunshine3914 Год назад

I started charging. 😊

@sunshine3914 Год назад

I started charging. 😊

@LiamMill 2 месяца назад

I'm 24 and struggle with social anxiety too because of my Narcissistic Father, he messed up how I view relationships and people, I feel like I can't trust people, but it sucks because I want to have relationships, but it's exhausting putting on a mask to be able to act normal around people.

@luminous6969 Год назад

I kinda wish I had anxiety so that I'd have an excuse for having no friends.

@chiragmehta8212 4 месяца назад

Trust me you don’t want this. Id rather have broken bones.

@auroramothergoddess Год назад

I honestly think In our country in America in the western culture a lot of people suffer from mental health due to us being corporate slaves = toxic never ending cycles . because we are enslaved we rarely have time to hang out let alone afford it. I think we are so such an individualistic society we move alone, not in packs. We are programmed to work and spend and nothing else matters. Add all the evil in the world that affects the brain like corn. Not to mention the human nature tendencies humans have for violence and sixual needs where we can’t really trust people because there are bad people out there. …all these things combined is a complete disaster and bad things just waiting to happen

@thugnastykathy Год назад

I feel like westernized culture makes all of us feel this way even though the saying is true of IT TAKES A VILLAGE. where did that empathy go?

@ttalah2964 Год назад

Wait till you get married to your best friend and you realize how hard will be . To live in peace , don’t expect anything from any one , and be able to live without them any time .

@sarahalderman3126 Год назад

Better yet, wait until you marry your best friend only to discover they were never your best friend but your worst enemy.

@ttalah2964 Год назад

@@sarahalderman3126 that’s why I don’t trust anyone . Have a great day

@SassyL62 5 месяцев назад

I had all those things as a kid totally loved by my parents.. but I was always a shy child growing up and now struggle with social anxiety

@aingkieu403 13 дней назад

I know it's got everything to do with me and not them, but the problem is most of the time I just don't know how to connect with people. I have no idea what to say, in my mind I'm freaking out like "what do I say? What if I say the wrong thing? What if they think I'm stupid?" So while I'm mute, I'm trying to come up with something to say and I think people can sense that I'm freaking out inside and they just think that I'm weird so they're probably just don't want to have anything to do with me.

@aingkieu403 13 дней назад

Because who wants to hang out with someone who's super awkward?

@LindaM1976 5 месяцев назад

I’ve had anxiety all of my life and been in and out of therapy. The therapists always try to say we are worried about a certain thing or we are worried we are gonna die. Sometimes we are just worried about feeling the panic and so we will try to avoid that feeling at any cost.

@inkbythebarrelandpaperbyth6905 Год назад

Thanks for calling in this was practically very helpful

@bluered5527 7 месяцев назад

Wow i have social anxiety and trust issues and my mum has alot of mental issues including bipolar disorder

@Caringsoul245 7 месяцев назад

I have anxiety too. I feel ya... it's hard to make friends. 😪 we need to keep trying I guess. It's even harder to make online friends for me...

@Arturo_Zepe Год назад

I have the same problem, must of people the I know they abuse of substances. I’m afraid to get in trouble for them. I have no addictions and I’m trying to make friends, but I’m scare.

@girlygirl1890 Год назад

@azvshm you are definately on the right path my friend, with no addictions. Keep going on that path and stay there and never let anyone ever sway you towards that. Good for you. Blessings.

@voidedisolation 4 месяца назад

Oh hey ITS ME. Not really but might as well be 😞

@aingkieu403 13 дней назад

Is there an update? Is he doing better now? I have social anxiety and no social life, too. I started therapy like 2 months ago but at the moment I feel like I'm doing even worse, maybe because the therapist is forcing me to confront my problems. I feel like I'm on an emotional rollercoaster, it's killing me. I'm also disappointed in myself because I barely make progress. It's like I take one step forward then two steps back.

@ericmoore9444 Год назад

Friends are overrated and abusive anyway 🤷🏼‍♂️

@luminous6969 Год назад

Those aren't friends.

@MijoShrek Год назад

Yeah, that just means you just didn't have good experiences with what You had.

@Big_talks. Год назад

People will never understand this 😂 I won’t even say abusive but you are you’re own bestfriend smh

@sunshine3914 Год назад

As the other “doc” always said, “You teach people how to treat you.”

@lavans06 22 дня назад

Ok - Doc said don't use the 'be my friend' method - and I got lost lol 0.o How else would you word it for a platonic reasoning? --> I guess that's where clear communicative intention is

@sarahalderman3126 Год назад

What’s the worst thing that could happen? You push your way through all the crap, brave your way into making friends, working up your career, and upward in life… twenty years goes by and all your worst fears COME TRUE. I’m sorry this is wrong. Other people are actually a threat. I was raped and molested as a child by a porn addict. My husband hid his porn addiction and had an affair with my younger sister who I had spent the previous 7 years trying to help. People just take and they always take more than I could give. I can honestly say I have absolutely nothing left for anyone who isn’t my child and have ZERO desire to ever try any of it again. At this point in my life I am just done.

@Farmingtoon 9 месяцев назад

15:30 delony show

@imveryhungry112 Год назад

For me , I look kinda weird :(

@JJ-pt7xb Год назад

You're perfect just the way you are

@greencase Год назад

What are you doing? I have anxiety. K.

@rsnc23 4 месяца назад

Drink more alcohol.

@jovitarich7078 Год назад

I swear by Life Skills International, saved my life…the satellite where I went is “Bay Area Life Skills” in San Jose CA. I learned everything that’s I had questions about.

@SassyL62 5 месяцев назад

He sounds cute..I’m 25 let’s link up 🫢🤭