Are Flying Monkeys Also Narcissists Or Just Cowards? 

narcissist ''feeds'' them in one way or another with cheap affection and fake support,thats why and they a e not able to see the truth,they are stupid

They dont dare……the narcicist punnish is to hurtfull.

yes they are Astonishing Dolts! just Dump all Chumps! live with JOY!!!!!!!

They are invested in the relationship.

Or they might believe the victim, but don't want to admit it, because as DAvid said, the flying monkey is invested in the relationship with the narc.

My family believed the smear campaign and isolated me from them,I was the perfect target, I hadn't been around my family in years,and only had two friends I hung around with, I worked and came home,this narcissistic person got a plan to get me out of my workplace where I was quickly rising,at first I believe they were trying to set me up for some kind of sexual harassment, she wore really skimpy, inappropriate clothes all the sudden, I was thinking why all the sudden she was doing that,at the time I didn't think anything about it, when that didn't work I believe they hacked my phone, to gather dirt, I was someone who was rising,one person I know felt rejected, its was just a narcissistic situation, and I bet they've done it before in the past,now I'm smeared all over town,and stalked, and I'm supposed to admit my sins to get my life back,but I guess their sins are ok,if I work I'm harassed, so I'm homeless now.

@@targetedtyranny4661 They are unbelievably evil and cruel. I’m so sorry this happened to you.

Targeted Tyranny, I am so sorry this happened to you. My evil narcs sent a felon psychopath after me to destroy me. I ended up with serious health complications & stage 3-4 cancer. Murder with clean hands.

@@fifilafleur5555 I'm really sorry to hear your troubles,it seems these kind of things are more prevalent,it hard to understand why normal everyday people would go and lash out to strangers because someone asked them to,its a sad cold world.

@@targetedtyranny4661 my heart goes out to you man, I am also a ti and my family/town/community is also against me and it’s tough to try and make it in the rat race because these parasites seem to be everywhere. Don’t lose hope brother, if you are sinning turn away from that immediately and Become a righteous person and only do good, help others when possible. I hope to not offend but May I suggest praying to Jesus Christ for help and call on Archangel Michael for protection. Get back in the game and get a roof over your head! It’s hard work but the main point is don’t give up, believe in yourself for Jesus Christ already does… 🌞🙌🏽🙏🏽❤️‍🔥

Fascinating conclusion...the vicarious enjoyment (or relief) of being on side of the bully/narc...perhaps b/c they secretly wish they could do it or they feel that they will finally not be the target of that narc. Well said!

I couldn't have said it better! "They delude themselves into thinking they do". Spot on.

This is what the Bible says: Rom 1:28-32: "And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: *Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, NOT ONLY DO THE SAME, BUT HAVE PLEASURE IN THEM THAT DO THEM."* = Description of flying Monkeys 👍👍

THIS! 💯🎯

This is when their cowardice shows: They always GANG up on their victim. But if you approach one individually to try to solve a conflict - by using reason and facts - and you refuse to accept the lies they resort to, they RUN AWAY. Back to the safety of the gang. Truth, for the narcs and their minions, must be attacked, denied, lied about, shoved away, kicked down, and buried in the dirt. Truth is what threatens them most. If you dare face off with the gang, they work to make you feel like you're the crazy one, even when you KNOW you're not.

Or they have their own Cluster B disorder.

I think it’s not so black and white. The grey area is where the abused scapegoat subscribes to some of the narcissists behaviours in an attempt to placate them. The golden child is both trainee narcissist and a coward within themselves as they prefer an easy ride to challenging things. If you’re on the end of constant praise and adulation you soon accept the price of supporting them.

@@brynleytalbot778 it’s energy projected , I didn’t know that my bro was used as flying monkey and my cousin and leader- grown ass person my mom

100% agree, when I saw the title I thought definitely both. In fact this is how I worked out my mom is a bigger coward and a bigger vuln covert than my father. She is his flying monkey as well ✌

@@brynleytalbot778the scapegoat was the first golden child who CHOOSE to see the truth. But the narcissist hated not having control over them so they ditched them.

Yep narcs are petulant 6 yr olds ,so flying monkeys cannot handle a petulant 6 yr old gutless. L

Yes! 😆😆😆 Memorable!

Way too accurate, Alfonso 🤦😆

Yes! Led by the same ringmaster. Great comment , Alfonso 👆🏼

Spot on! 😊🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

You are right

@JohnOakes-mw5ls This is articulated perfectly 👌 I too am a survivor of narcassistic abuse from not only my Mother and 3 siblings but also my exhusband

@@teresafraser3049 I’m truly sorry to hear that! Bad men and women can see through people clearly who’ve suffered narcissistic abuse and are in complex trauma, and they target them because they know they are easily manipulated. Stay safe and stay strong! 🙏🙏🙏

Flying monkeys usually are surrounded by lots of other flying monkeys They are indeed narcissists and cowards That describes my sister perfectly They have sold themselves down the river Her betrayal of me was unforgivable and now she wants to be friends as l am the only member of our family still alive I find it amusing and the answer is noooo

You are so right I limit my circle to my children and their families and just a few friends who l know are trustworthy zThe rest can take a jump

That's a correct way to look at it.

Get yourself FREE!!! Forget them and have a great life. Do not let them know ANYTHING about you!! Stay far away and let the be in their mud together.

So very true. But still they watch things happen. Many evil things.

well said nd true to fact

Absolutely, Mary. Well said.

Love your post, every word you said is so true🥰💯

@@imeldafloyd5571 so sad but so true....onward and upward...

When we realise that’s how we are established as a friend it’s a great time to start taking back control, gradually, testing the boundaries. I don’t think being alone creates a healthy world view. We need to safety test boundaries and progress from there, confidently.

Kathi Lin thank you for sharing your story! It’s an inspiration to me! Unfortunately, my kids are also groomed by my stbx and are totally rejecting me :(. Hope I can get them out of his grip!

Im glad you guys found your way out together!

@@katiegeyfman6259 Katie, all four of my children might as well be total strangers. I agonize about having them slip away every single day.😪

@@rodandjudibowen5665 Hope they’ll slip away soon! 🙏🍀

c,.

They often lack the insight that come from having a well developed " self". Instead as the narcissist they have a self that vulnerable, and instead are focused on their " self image". That is their public self. They are also alot of the time machiavellistic. That is they are also manipulators, but they don`t have " narcissistic personality dissorder". What the flying Monkey don`t understand. Is that they are a blunt instrument in the hand of the narcissist. That is the narcissist have a instrumental relationship to the flying monkey. But the flying monkey often have a emotional relationship to the narcissist. As he say they are expendabel. But they are to brainwashed to see it

100% Good analysis. Flying monkeys have often had the wool pulled over their eyes and see themselves as defending the wronged party (the narcissist).

Agree 100%. This is why I disagree calling flying monkeys cowards or narcissists is going way to far, there are many factors and labeling them as such is 100% wrong. Flying monkeys, yes.....always cowards or narcissists no.

SO well-said!💥

Flying monkeys are very often just lesser narcs with less power. It’s a hierarchy system with these types. Really quite evil when you witness what they do to the scapegoat/target.

In my point of view and from my experience, the flying monkeys are either narcisists themselves or just plain toxic but rarely inocent people who just believe and want to help the narc. If someone gain some benefits from validating the narc and his actions, he is not naive but toxic. Many of the flying monkeys do get something in return.

Hello Elaine reading about yer self!

@@lesleybrown1583 Who's Elaine?

I find them to be very weak minded people easily led but nasty too…

Yes! You nor I do not owe those types any explanation. I just cut them off in silence at the sign of the first red flag nowadays

This happened to me too. I finally had to leave my job. And there was nothing to report. Who would believe me? The Corp Dir of HR had been in her job for over 20 years and was complicit. Mran girls indeed. I never was a cool girl in high school and I didn't become one in my 50s. Peace to you.

@@ebd12345 if those people are what's "cool" then good for you for not being one of them! I don't want to be their kind of "cool" either!

Also, I really think all businesses should educate employees about narcissism and HR should be there to protect the victims. If they knew more about it themselves, they wouldn't make the same mistakes over and over again and instead of an unhealthy work environment would be a happy and safe place to work at.

Great analogy

That is exactly how these people like to operate, cowardly, shallow and weak.

They are just as bad in my opinion

Excellent analogy! This is exactly the feeling behind this whole dynamic.

Personally I wouldn't use terms like "alpha" and "lesser narcissist" because I can imagine narcissists loving terms like that. I prefer more technical terms such as "individuals suffering from narcissistic moron disorder"

Yeah, part of their description is envy, wishing to be like the Head Narcissist but not quite as "successful."

Village idiots for sure

Maybe not clueless so much as too willing to believe in the innate human goodness.

@@krejados1 Yes. That too.

My little brother is stupid to his core, he’ll never snap out of it either. He’s got no reason to either so he’ll never change.

Yes . Both full of fear and disgust with themselves

I think the expression of narcissistic traits through self promotion is more evident due to social media but it’s not indicative of a rise in Narcissistic Personality Disorder. However it’s noticeable that narcissists with their social charm and zero morals are climbing up corporate hierarchies and building legions of flying monkeys crediting them with their positions of power. These monkeys are generally intellectual morons with the sole ability of following strict orders and operating under the fear of being unmasked as incompetent which holds up the hierarchy of support for the narcissist in command. I think this corporate paradigm is feeding narcissistic behaviour and undermining societies mental well being. No wonder so many people are taking antidepressants to mask the reality of their bleak world.

@@brynleytalbot778 While I agree with what you said we have to go back and look at what has been taught in the schools for the past 50 years. Our children were taught good things by us but they spent most of their time with school teachers who were training them to love themselves more than anyone else. They called it "self-esteem" but really what they were building was pride and resistance to correction and even instruction if they didn't like what they were hearing. An overabundance of attention and praise causes narcissism. It becomes no longer about getting joy and confidence from doing something well but it is about receiving praise no matter how lazy they were. I am old enough now to have seen the dramatic change in the culture from when we were children 70 years ago to our children who lack respect and honor, requiring praise to have a relationship with anyone.

@@gwendolynwehage6336 This is nonsense. Narcissists are created at home. Your assertions about kids being taught about self esteem jn school don’t make any sense.

@@LeeH688 you assertion that narcissists are created at home is not proven. I know people who were raised by very good families who were loving, but because the narcissist chose to act in aggressive ways as they get older having been influenced by the culture around them, they follow their own hearts rather than the way they were raised. I have had older adopted children and much interaction with people over the years and it is not proven that something bad happened at home to create a narcissist. People make their choices based on what they enjoy. Some people enjoy dominance and feeling superior to others so they reject good teaching to be kind and loving.

@@LeeH688 I too believe narcissists are created within families. But to support Gwendolyn's idea, some of it is genetic. There is definitely a strong dynamic that a child is sucked into at a young age. I believe most of it is neglect, abandonment, emotional abuse and betrayal.

Keep moving forward, Catherine!

@@SurvivingNarcissism Thank you.

​@@SurvivingNarcissism.. Hi Doc. Can you answer this question for me please. It would help put some things into perspective for me. My Mother "caped" for a narc I cut off months ago just yesterday. He had been shopping where she works. She called me after thier conversation asking had he called me. Because he had not called me as she suggested for him to she told me about thier "run-in". She said "he just needs a friend right now" and according to him he wrecked his new car, caught a DUI charge and his job is hectic. She went on for a bit and I just couldn't believe what I was hearing. Im over 40 by the way my Mother is close to 70. Would you consider that behavior as "flying monkey" behavior?

Totally feel you, Paula. My two kids are also narcissists, groomed by their father, whom I'd divorced long ago - ironically, to minimise his influence on them. I too piled on the guilt and blame and shame until Dr C's calm demeanour and wise words helped me find perspective. Take good care, Paula.

I think it helps at least some to understand who the real ringleader is and the BIG show flying circus at their command. In my case the head was/is my former MIL who commands the circus to this day, decades later. Not my ex after all, who remarried for a while to a really great guy who helped notch down the fire for a couple years, until her mother told her she must dump him too... Then right back at fever pitch how the narcissists have to have the endless drama. I had thought my ex and both her parents were narcissists, but the MIL turns out was and is the Leader of the pack and all the rest just inducted into the flying monkey circus. The show must go on! Drama, drama, drama... Former MIL has the pack (my kids too) so well trained they will still be performing their parts in the circus well after she has kicked the bucket, and no longer rewarding or threatening them. Bucket kicking coming soon but about 40 years too late.

I like watching Dr. Carter's programs too. Went through that sort of thing not once but twice. It was as if each biological father I had married starting at the age of 18 only to later get a divorce from were both being enabled to be continuing only for awhile with a stamp of approval given them from the family court system to continue profiting during their puppeteering of a step mother instead of me the biological mother while in truth they themselves were being used as a puppet too in the same hierarchy being run at the time most by the love of money, titles and status symbols too. Both step mothers had to find out the hard way why I left them.

I like watching Dr. Carter's programs too. Went through that sort of thing not once but twice. It was as if each biological father I had married starting at the age of 18 only to later get a divorce from were both being enabled to only for awhile with a stamp of approval given them from the family court system to continue profiting during their puppeteering of a step mother instead of trying to continue puppeteering by using me the biological mother while in truth they themselves were being used as a puppet too in the same hierarchy being run at the time most by the love of money, titles and status symbols too. Both step mothers had to find out the hard way why I left them. What have I learned most from both experiences? -- When any man starts grooming and dictating to you in word and/or in deed what your future should be for him, no matter how charming it is coming across at first, run for the hills and never look back at him again in quite the same way.

And what is your role? Is it only another person who made your children narcissitic??. Sounds pretty (covert) narcissitic to me! Playing the victim. No responsibility, I read.

Ime, if they're called on it away from the narc, self-preservation is the vibe they'll try to throw out,. But since monkeys always outnumber the narc, it just comes down to being lazy, spineless, and having a loose, ambiguous grip on the whole "moral thing."

Exactly

Because they are weak and they don't want to take responsibility. They are absolutely fine to see someone else suffering from the narcissist and for the cowardness of the flying monkeys. They don't have enough spine to stand up for justice. That is why they become flying monkey in the first place. It is much easier to have no confrontation. You can even hide your cowardness: the narcissist is suffering... The problem with that is: you enable the narcissist to hurt others and the narcissist learns he can do whatever he wants. There is absolutely no boundaries. They just have to demand. The flying monkeys created a monster because the monster never learned that there is some kind of limit. There is NOTHING. No logic, no reasoning, no common intrest. Only more and more denying, more lies, more twisted reasoning. Free fall into a world that has only one goal: keep the narcissist fed to satisfy his demands. It doesn't matter how unhealthy or damaging the consequences are. No consequences will be paid by the narcissist, only by the scapegoat. When justice, logic, longterm intrest, intrest of the common or even the survival of the common are all secondary to the narcissists demand: what left is pure chaos and a deadly threat to everything and everybody who is on the way. The narcissists will is the tornado of the highest category. How can a flying monkey stop that, they couldn't not stop it when it was only a storm? They created it and they are too weak to even admit that how much it is their own fault.

You can't trust anything in this kind of environment. Absolutely nothing can be trusted. No people, no "information", no "reality". Nothing. You can't even trust your own eyes.

The flying monkeys are getting some benefit from the narcissist in my opinion.

Parents are often the biggest enablers...

Yes I agree. My mother was my covert narc sisters forever flying monkey or enabler. Our mother has passed away fairly recently and my sister still clings to the need to have our mothers support even from beyond the grave. It’s almost disgustingly mind boggling. I call it triangulation by proxy post mortem. She still triangulates our mother against me. My sister will always say “our mother was so strong”. Um no. She just fed your self entitlement over inflated selfish ego and narc supply. Nothing more. Our mother was weak and gullible yet I’m thinking she wanted to preserve a sense of peace but only for herself by not becoming involved in her old age.

Shortly after my breakdown I’d recovered some physical activity by sorting out scrap wire and metal. Not feeling mentally able to face the scrapyard I got my narcissistic brother to take it. He pocketed the higher priced scale proceeds claiming it all went as ferrous, the cheapest. My narcissistic mother defended him stating I shouldn’t have asked him to help me. After she passed I found that he’d been ransacking the loft stealing valuables. He has no morals or ethics beyond his selfishness. He seeks high status associations, my mother recounting them with evident pride. Immaturity sums it up yet he played up his responsibilities, something I couldn’t emulate, my mother pushing the point to degrade me. A long absence, forced by him, as I’m of no use, and a threat to his false identity, yet it’s still bugging me, though I’m not so plagued by the feeling I’m supposed to sort everything out at my own mental cost. Yet this role still plagues me and is repeated in my life. Understanding why is good but no cure for repeating this conditioned role.

Not only is it gross, but on some level strange. I've experienced the same with the parents of someone who's impulsively mean, crude and rude. All they have to do is talk in a firm tone to their parents and their parents shut down. Makes me wonder whether or not their parents are afraid to anger this individual. Yet, they know better than to show this side of themselves on the job or around friends in public, thus presenting a false front, a façade to anyone outside of the 'family's dynamic. It's sad really as the parents are old.

@@rockstarofredondo 🤢

Here is the thing

My narc mom just finished chemo🤔

My Narc Mother had breast cancer as well.

Maria: Good point.

Thank you! As I read τhat I FINALLY undestood what's happening- Bless you! X (I've even screen shot it so I Can re read it over til it sinks in! )

Yes. This is a lot like my parents’ dynamic. FM mother is covertly envious of me and she got pretty good at making sure he often took it out on me too. So much so that for awhile I was confused about who was the worst one and who was pulling all the strings with the other one. One day I was just rather like well, toxic is toxic and so I consider them both unreliable, hopeless, unsafe, etc. Well and then you can also add most of the sibs and their kids to that as well. I spend a lot of time over here on my island alone, away from pretty much the entire lot of them.

It’s epigenetic. Narcissism seems to run down a family as if it were a generic inheritance. What’s actually happening is that the learned role of parenting is unconsciously repeated causing the trait to be fed and watered. If you prune it out it can be ended. However if it’s taken root it may well be impossible to put up the mirror to perfection that’s so superior grandiose it can’t be challenged.

I am with you in this. Both my young children (10 year old boy and girl twins) have a Narcissistic grandma and dad. I pray that I may be enough of a counter balance to offset the damage already caused by these two people. I learn and grow so my children can be confident, secure, know that they are loved for who they really are. May God help us all.

Buy a hidden camera online (or two) online. Get him on video. If you aren’t comfortable with video purchase hidden voice recorders. Begin gathering your evidence.

Same for me!

It’s great you saw that at such an early age. It took me till fifty to finally uncover the role I’d been assigned. When you’ve been raised in the scapegoat role and the flying monkey is your assigned purpose against your other parent you don’t see the manipulation as it’s a conditioned role with no comparative one elsewhere as you’ve been raised to fear opening up to others outside, or threatened should you share family dynamics with anyone. My mother made repeated threats all laughed off as me interpreting them literally and being too sensitive. I didn’t speak about my parental situation till I was in my late forties. My brother is the golden child and relished his position, learning how to play both saint and martyr, emulating his narcissistic mother. My father and I were mere spectators called on at will for support. A crazy family dynamic.

@@brynleytalbot778 my father was the rageing abusive narcissist and my sister a year older than me acted just like him by her age of 4 and stayed that way ,mom left my dad when I was 10 and the rageing sister just took his spot , she treated mom just as bad as dad and she hated me and my sister a year younger than me , my mom became the scapegoat and the flying monkey me and my younger sister had to constantly defend ourselves and mother would just try to make us do what sister wanted , it didn't work out so well me and my sister left home on our own she was 15 and I was 16 , didn't seem to phase anyone , we moved away from them over 700 miles and rarely ever heard from them , moved back to same town and 20 years later and narc sister was still running mom's life ,was never nice to her , my mom jumps at her every command and only let's her be around when she says she can , my mom is now 80 ,I act like I don't give 2 shits about anything so she doesn't bother me ,she does know I will tell her straight up what is what if she treats me in any of the ways , we all live in the same town and act like we don't know each other , it's crazy ! And I knew it was crazy since I was 3 , things were extremely not right !y mother took way to much abuse and just wanted things to be calm ,I did understand that also very young ! It's all been kinda a struggling,nightmare, lonely life . It's really strange that my sister,me mom all live alone in each our homes and sister has this big family that does everything ,big birthdays , big holidays , big vacations and no we weren't invited lol I always wondered what it would have been like to cook with my mom and have her in my children's lives as they were growing up ,I can never understand how a person can let someone else own them , But I see it all the time with lots of people over the years ,my mom apologizes all the time ,I never once thought it was her fault , my life was hard going it alone but mom's life was just so sad watching her try to please and got nothing but insults ,yep crazy world we live in !

That's an amazing insight and I applaud you for having the courage to face the truth and act on it. You should be proud of yourself. Not many can achieve this. 🌸🌷

I agree they don’t always realise this is what’s happening and have been sold lies lies lies. However, once you realise and still choose to stay then that’s different!

It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Epigenetic transfer. The parental dynamic of a narcissistic upbringing is the only reference point, as is the one if a healthy parental model, so that’s the paradigm used to raise the next generation. The upbringing will reflect the moires of that new generation but will, in action, replicate the conditioned one of their parents. Add in social media, for this generation, and the narcissistic behaviour has a greater potential than ever before. And add into that the growing trend for social fit to usurp merit in promotions, a facet of the feminisation of workplaces, and the narcissists have had a couple of good decades to ingratiate themselves into actual power. Welcome to the most depressed society, ever.

Absolutely!!! Coming to awareness for the ones who have been victimised and socialised is so difficult !!! You are the hero I the story who set an example for something different . I love heroes !!!

No, Flying Monkeys are evil and they are doing it out of their own choice. Of course they may have been through some things, we all have, but they made that decision knowingly.

IMO - if someone is born into a narcissistic system he/she is often comfortable with what is going on. The person doesn't recognize the dynamic because it appears "normal." For example, It wasn't until my mother died that I was able to recognize how enmeshed the extended family members were concerning dysfunctional behavior patterns.

Well said.

Soon to be X?? My Dear, I hope you have a good support network as well as a Counselor. The narcissist doesn't like to loose supply and loose in court. Mine cost me a lot of $$. And 19 months of hell on earth. Get prepared, if you haven't already. When my narcissist received the divorce papers, she went nuts. She sent copies to my family, went to all the neighbors, went to Church members, my friends, and somehow got to the people at my work. She told her twisted, embellished, fake story of lies. "The smear campaign" was unmerciful. And just horrible. Sorry. I know where you are at.

It makes me cry thinking how he destroyed their lives

Sounds like it’s a common thing they do. I’m grateful for this information

That’s where I’m at now. Free physically from Narcissist Ex but he’s weaponized my children against me. I pray that someday they might figure it out, but I’m not holding my breath.

❤️

It's actually good news when they show their true colors because you now know who to stay away from

@Carolyn Pitt I know Carolyn.... that's why I walked away. You can never win. They expect you to be a doormat and if you dare to disagree or stand up for yourself, you're in the wrong. Life isn't very fair, to us empaths.... everyone confides in us... knowing their secrets are safe..... but when we confide in them.... well, we're just giving them ammunition. Found that out the hard way. Not any more though. Funny thing is... now I have some distance from them.... I'm gaining strength, at long last and don't feel the same need to confide. Though it 'is' lovely to engage this way, with other empaths. ❤

So well spoken, friend.

@@stickyicky6418 thanks my friend! I deeply appreciate the compliment. Hope you are well. Peace and Love

Have you ever considered the monster Narcissist have mental illnesses with ADHD MINDED INTELLIGENT ADHD SYMPTOMS ????

ADHD troubles weaknesses with EXECUTIVE DYSFUNCTION. (HIGH PRESSURE SALES TACTICS to order people to do TASKS they are not able to CARRY OUT. SO they need puppets to carry out their ideals. & Praise Up them for thinking & inventing 💡💡💡💡 Ideas that sounds like a GENIUS. Etc. Everyone's BEHAVIORS are WRONG. THE PUPPETEER & HIS OR HER PUPPETS : Flying monkeys worshipers.

@@boostmobile9249 I agree with what you say. In my research, we are all here researchers, CPTSD causes ADHD like ways of behaving and thinking. I would have been easily diagnosed with ADHD. Yet getting the root of my cognitive dysfunctions I found CPTSD. Working through this with a wide variety of "therapies" from gut health, mitochondrial health and up through the mind and into spirit has removed all ADHD symptoms....oh exercise...key. Also staying away from toxic personality types. My kind and compassionate nature, a drive really, kept me from acting out like flying monkeys do. Still healing though. Hope you find your way out of what ever pain your in. I think your more than enough... intrinsically worthy of Dignity, Civility and Respect. A heart felt love going your way!

I too would like to see one about obsessions displayed in regard to a target and the lengths gone to to continue the obsession.

delusional behavior? my spouse, soon as he decided to 'Amp' up the mistreatment or ab use (went from covert to Overt) started saying to me how every woman wanted em, that he could pick up the ☎️ anytime he pleased and replace me and 'not even bat an eye' or feel a thing. 😆🤣

if not mistaken, have heard obsessive compulsive go hand in hand with nar....m. they tend to be o/c about *'something'* so they can be in control of that.

yes, the narc is very delusional indeed

DrC has mentioned the delusion. He refers to it as their “alternative reality.” So yes, definitely delusional. As far as the OCD goes… i have a feeling he will most likely give you a similar answer he once gave me about narcissism and hypochondria. I asked if all narcissists are hypochondriacs since nearly every narcissist i have encountered seems to also always have sometime wrong with their health. DrC told me, “Not all narcissists are hypochondriacs. But are all hypochondriacs narcissists? You might be onto something there.” Nearly each and every one of the narcissists i have had to deal with have also been OC about something… even if it’s simply how they HAVE to have control over every situation. That is 100% OC and also narcissistic.

That's a difficult task, but your mental health has to come first. Glad to be on the journey with you. Dr. C

❤️

Friends... No doubt. It's difficult to impossible with a narcissistic psychopath sibling, James, using government military surveillance to attack people around me. Praying for deliverance.

You said it, *deviant souls.

Triangulation of mother against father using son to support her. Threats of being thrown out used to bully the son who eventually sees no future outside of the home which has been cast as a place of safety and security against the world she depicts as hostile and unforgiving. Freedom given and he’s told he’s luckier than her. A false set of constructs, her world, imposed on him. And after establishing more threats over sharing the family situation with outsiders, no hope of forming an alternative perspective, one of reality. How to abuse in easy steps.

Agreed. Happened to me too.

@@brynleytalbot778 How VERY SAD 😢

You're so right.

Thanks for sharing this...there are so many nuances to the topic.

Is that you Will Smith? 🤣

I can certainly relate to this. For so long, I believed all of the narcissist's tales of woe and how they were always the victim. I played "rescuer" and truly was made to believe that if I just did more, gave more, etc then their pain and victim hood status would be cured. It is exhausting living with someone who is almost a "professional" malcontent, and needs you to always feel it is YOUR fault they feel that way. Congratulations on your escape!

You did things morally repugnant to your character..to save a narc? I am getting a whiff of SOMETHING... No honorable person does that...

They are willingly or unwillingly R U N for your life

Good that you see it, Texas Patty!

@@rooftopcat1785 They are pretty good actors in the beginning , then they get so lazy that they don't care anymore , especially if they think you can't go on without them . The big top show turns into a big 💩💩💩💩show & yes those back ups are there & ready for introduction . I did learn just how EVIL these creatures are !!!

You're welcome.

Narcissist can be very good experts in their field of work, pastors, doctors, ........there is no end. I disagree with the doctors summary that flying monkeys are all cowards and narcissists themselves. After watching and learning for so long from him I'm actually surprised he believes and is teaching this. Flying monkeys are what they are, but may not be cowards or narcissists. I think flying monkeys are sometimes the victims as well.

"Now instead of being the flying monkey" I love this line. I love your courage for not being the flying monkeys. Live well !!! 🙌

I guess some flying monkeys just enjoy being out of the firing line.

@@jarhead21100 very true. I don’t think the flying monkey always realise this is what they’ve been groomed to do. I think at times they take people at face value and only later may realise they’ve been used as a flying monkey. I know a flying monkey who realised this is what they were being used to do. They removed themselves from the circus, and are healing from the damage and all the lying the narc told to get them on-side. Sometimes I don’t think all flying monkeys intentionally set out to be one. I think when you realise the games and go you’re being used and still CHOOSE to stay then that’s different and not okay. However, when you realise, and CHOOSE to apologise to the people who were wronged by the narc (because of the barrage of lies they told you) and you CHOOSE to speak up and remove yourself from that then you do hold character and integrity because your eyes have know been opened to see the games/splitting and lies ….

Thank you for your kind words.

Go slow. See if she has true insight.

You are not the only one things like this happens to. It may seem like it, but you are not. You are the better person. They not only suck the air out of a room, they suck the life out of you. They are jerks.

Their intention to harm you was actually an opportunity to escape their No Fun Club. (They can go shove it, for all I care)

So true.

Exactly! I did enough self-work too and I got sick of sometimes, for a little while too long maybe, of finding ways to excuse the inexcusable as another mere misunderstanding or two different people being just different people

So pleased you have found them helpful. I'm glad to be on the journey with you. Dr. C