ASSASSIN'S CREED IV BLACK FLAG (Zero Punctuation) 

Watching this review again years later and it’s clear that he was right to be worried about Ubisoft’s stapler.

Can we talk about how genius it was to make the "chase floating pieces of paper" sidequest into a hunt for sea shanties?

I wonder if AC is at some point going to reenact that scene from space balls: "What we're seeing here is happening now." "Now? What do you mean now?" "What we're watching has caught up to the now. Everything is happening now." "Now?" "No." "Why not?" "Because it's over. Everything that happens now happens now." "When will the then become the now?" "... Soon." "....... How soon?"

Wait, pirates you might have taken some interest in recruiting? I was picking up guys out of the water on the way to my next objective just because the button prompt came up.

Assasins creed 5: vikings, now with 25% more sailing. meet harald bluetooth, gorm the old, find artifact related to valhalla, use axes instead of blades.

Unity definitely went down on the line graph

As a tall ship sailor I loved the sailing in AC4. It's one of my all time favorite games because of the mix of gameplay mechanics and how well the sailing was executed.

If Ubisoft likes sailing so much a viking themed assassins creed sounds like a cool idea

Ubisoft should just scrap the entire Assassin part of their title and make pirate games. The sailing's incredible, but the stealth doesn't work. It never has, and probably never will.

hey i just realized, the viking era would be cool for sailing as well! sea battles, land raids, all the fun stuff. though no cannons.

I'd like to see an Assassin's Creed game set in WWI... just hear me out. World War 1 began because of an assassination of an important dignitary, and the overreaction to said assassination... perhaps there was some whispering going on in the conference rooms... Also, WWI isn't very well-documented on the fronts, apart from things like soldiers' journals (in which some guy in a menacing hood could easily prevent himself from being written about) and officer reports that could be summed up in "Took German Trench 123. Casualties: **,*** men lost." And they only got a chance to storm trenches if the enemy was either shelled into submission or distracted, by for example a hooded guy stabbing officers. So maybe, the war started because the Arch Bishop who was assassinated was actually a Templar Grandmaster, and the Assassin sent to kill him took a newbie or something who just shot up the car, then Templars in European governmets started telling people to start a war, and so WWI begins. It's subtle, and if done right, there would be no record of Assassin or Templar involvement at all. C'mon, it'd be awesome to charge a tank and storm trenches. Maybe even fly a plane (as combat aircraft started to become pretty major around the middle of the war).

I actually loved Black Flag. Yes, the eavesdropping and stalking missions were a pain, but it was a good challenge. Loved sailing and blowing enemy ships up to splinters. Black Flag was actually the first AC game I played, and I loved it so much I went out and bought the PS3 pack that had AC1, the AC2 trilogy, and AC3. So far so good.

Yahtzee absolutely nailed this review it was so spot on and accurately captured my exact feelings on the game and the series in general.

>I'm reminded of that line from Heath Ledger's Joker: "I think you and I are destined to do this forever" >A line that proved slightly ironic for Heath Ledger but a good summary of the weary resignation I have towards Assassin's Creed at this point lmao I love you Yahtzee

This is the best AC since the 2nd one. But man those tailing missions. I hate tailing missions.

soooooo.... he enjoyed it?

Assassin's Creed CXXIV: Penguins Assassins From Madagascar Sailing on Turtles.

Awesome Pirate game brought down by the fact that it has to be an AssCreed.

I really, really hope Ubisoft will start to shy away from the annual release "thing" that they're doing. A year is simply not enough time to properly develop a game, but Ass Creed IV proved me (partially) wrong. The series should most likely take a break for at least a couple years before Ubisoft tasers it again with another sequel. I can almost guarantee that Assassin's Creed V will be announced at E3 2014, and if it is, I'll probably be a little pissed.

"I think me and you are destined to do this forever " a line somewhat ironic for heath ledger .... savage !!

"I do not like the look of that stapler it's holding" One of Yahtzee's funniest lines!

Personally, I either want to see a feudal Japan setting, an absolute monarchy Russia (mid-1800s, about), France during the French Revolution (I mean, come on, assassins and the French Revolution go together like bread and butter), Ancient Rome, preferably during the Julio-Claudian Dynasty, or Ireland during the Troubles (that might be too soon though, too touchy of a time period). Oh, or China during the Mongol invasions.

Being halfway through the story-missions, I totaly agree with Yahtzee on this game. Sailing around exploring stuff is fun, the story-missions are generaly not. Specialy when they are pretty much tutorials for side-missions that I have already done several times. And the Asscreed freerunning mechanic is as inffuriating as he says. Either you jump off in a direction you didnt intend, or (when chasing someone) you end up doing a strange mating dance against an unclimbable object.

*There should be an Assassin's Creed Rio de Janeiro. Seriously, let me explain:* As you can guess, I'm brazilian, I know my fair share of brazilian history. Shortly after the country aquired its independence, Brazil was run by the some corrupt republican assholes, who controlled the country because they held the only product profitable to the economy: coffee. Not only that, they had a complex system to manipulate elections, with rural militas and nepotism. After the Great Depression, coffee wasn't worth shit, so the country spiraled into a crysis. Not only the general population was pissed, but the elite too. A coup d'état was orchestrated, and a dictator called Getúlio Vargas came to rule the country. He was really intelligent, managing to save the economy, industrializing it in the process, inspired by Franklin Roosevelt's management. He was also loved by the masses, having a lot of populist policies, even being called "father of the poor". The catch? He was even more of a corrupt fuck than his predecessors, dabling with fascism and nazis. Hitler was a close ally to him, Getúlio's sole reason of not joinning him in WW2 was fear of the US. Eventually, he, in a very clever plan, abdicated his dictator role and declared Brazil a republic once again, being elected and ruling as a president for years to come. The part that gets really interesing: he commited "suicide". Everyone know he was murdered, but no one ever managed to prove it. There was actually a suicide note, probably not written by himself. It read "I leave life to enter history". Tell me that doesn't sound like Assassin's Creed? A pseudo nazi dictator who controlled the masses? That's totally Templar business. A secret assassination? Sounds like Altair had a hand in it. The architecture of the favelas in Rio, contrasting the rich elite buildings would be pretty cool to climb too, not to mention the beautiful scenery behind it all.

I rarely agree with your opinion on the games in this series but I greatly enjoy watching them anyway due to the humorous nature of how its presented. Thank you for your had work.

Well isn't this lovely. I've watched enough of Mr. Crosshaw's videos in a row that my brain now thinks in the same smug, obnoxious, pretentious voice I so love him for having. Heck, even my comments and speech style now work in tangent with his witty insult-creating mind.

Every word is true I just finished the first few missions and yea his description is accurate Jump Roll Jazz Hands and a whistle instead of a TA-DA

When will Ubisoft pull their fingers out of their collective arseholes and just make a AC game set in feudal Japan. Ninja Assassins vs Templar Samurais. That doesn't even have to make sense to be playable.

I KNEW he'd do a Windwaker sailing comparison.

Replaying this game now and he touched on pretty much everything. This game is so frustratingly close to great

i know the present day missions and story line add so called originality to the game, but i'd find myself much more immersed if i wasn't walking around with an electric piece of paper taking orders from some hacker i didn't even know the face of while spontaneously being the most quiet mother trucker that ever did live.

and I do not like the look of the stapler it holding

I always love how these reviews end! Can't believe it took me this long to find you.

Started playing rouge recently. Plays like black flag without the constant tailing so far. Unity sucked. Syndicate will be the first ac game I've not purchased. Ubisoft should really just give in and start a standalone pirate franchise.

I'd really like a graph of all the assassin's creed games tbh, I'm having a blast with 2and I come here for more recommendations for which ones are actually good and which ones to not bother with when the sales pop up

That heath ledger joke was tasteless... i liked it.

With everyone giving Assassin's Creed suggestions for different eras and places, let me mix it up with this: There should be a Sniper Elite game set in the Winter War, where you play as Simo Häyhä. I mean, it's like the game was made for that set up, you put up ambushes for the enemy tanks and such and then you snipe the shit out of them when they run around all confused as to how the enemy could possible know that they were going to use this road even though it is the only bloody road on this side of the bloody country.

How to make Assassin's Creed great again. 1) Remove Animus and Desmond. 3) ??? 4) Profit

Ahh, the last "good one". Running around muddy fields and overcast skies and one story hovels just doesn't compete with a goddamn pirate ship.

If they want the new game to be more interesting they need to make the combat more challenging It gets boring pressing the counter button to defeat entire armies of soldiers.

Who else PIRATED this game?... I haven't gone down to the comment section yet, so if this the billionth time this joke has been made, I apologize.

Fucking tail missions There was that one mission where i had to tail a rowboat but there were fucking crocodiles everywhere

My favorite part of the game was burrowing giant war axes into peoples craniums during combat. It made me laugh to no extent (it also made me come to terms with my blatant psychopathic tendencies)

4:11 made me laugh so hard cause it's soooo true

4:53 God, that gives me a thought. Wonder what they could do with the battle of Jutland?

4:10 is so true, happened so many times in just about every AC

Oddly enough, this video only makes me want AC 4 even more...

I wish they did Assassins Creed industrial revolution London. That would have been pretty coo

you missed the part where you have to chase ppl where a chair stops you cause you cant climb over it.

i don't care how late this is, someone needs to make fanart of that Link and Kenway sailing scene from the video.

The jazz hands got me

I'm from the future. Ubisoft now only make AC games (which are RPGs now) in settings where sailing is a core element. None of them are Feudal Japan for some cocking reason.

You're the only reason I'm subscribed to this channel.

I like how Yahtzee is reminded of the line from The Joker: I think you and I are destined to do this forever.' I am reminded of the quote from Harvey Dent in the same film 'You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.'

Everyones saying make a Feudal Japan setting, I just want them to drop the fucking eavesdropping missions. They're boring, stupid, and unnecessarily hard at times

That jazz hands thing was gold I straight up did that when it happened. I was like hey hows the whether?

Y'know, I think I'm gonna get this one. If the sailing and Errol Flynn-ing is at the forefront then I think I would really like this game. After all, ever since Assassin's creed 2, these games seem to devote a lot of time into making the player hoard wealth, which is exactly what pirates are supposed to do! Besides, as far as games go, the ninjas and the cowboys have had their fun so it's about time we got a new pirate game.

That batman comment about destined to do this forever and the ubisoft people writing about what they know made this vid shine

I've said it a thousand times and i'll say it again, make an assassins creed game in japan with samurai and ninjas and stuff. it would give ubisoft an opportunity to update the combat mechanics without making it feel out of place. nothing would be cooler than slicing up motherfuckers with dual katanas. maybe take a page out of the batman arkham games or shadow of mordor for the combat.

spot on in 2021

Everytime I see a new Zero Punctuation video I think whatever higher power that is out there for these videos always make my day!

I have looked forward to this game since the end of the previous title. My expectations were met,A much needed breath of fresh air for the franchise.This definitely feels like the biggest step forward since AC1 to AC2 (I also really liked Brotherhood).The developers have created a game with a more adventurous , fun tone that has an almost Pirates of the Caribbean vibe to it,

Well, think to the past, AC2 did good so they gave it an extension, while AC3 did poorly and they moved on immediately. I haven't played this one yet, so I don't know the ending, but perhaps it's success will generate a second pirate themed game. I'm a huge fan of Roman history, hopefully they go there sometime. There is an insane amount of material they could use.

That "Bittersweet Symphony" joke? 👌

Assassins creed 2 through revelations was the best few games, There'll never be a story like ezio

I finished AC3, left it a few days, forgot I'd finished it then loaded it up to play after work and was greeted with some weird 'Counter-hack dem hackzors' mission. So memorable an ending I'd forgotten that I'd done it. :(

He's right. Ubisoft will never stop making Assassin's Creed as long as they continue to be as successful as they are. Assassin's Creed is the COD of 3rd person action games. And it's just as douchey and unbelievably popular

I recently realized after finishing Unity that assassins creed is getting early representative of one of the circles of Hell in Dante's Inferno. In the poem the, hell for people who people who never took a stand for anything in life have to chase a blank banner around for eternity. It's a really weird coincidence.

Where do I find these Boobisoft games?

T cannot get enough of Yahtzee's humor (at least for the next little while) and I just have to say; thank you, for making these critiques.

Now we are ready to sail for the horn!

That Heath Ledger comment was fucking brilliant.

That bitter sweet symphony joke had me dying

the last sentence - oh, you're making my subscription to the Escapist worthy, sir.

Jesus this guy makes totalbiscuit look optimistic

Ever since AC brotherhood ended I hoped they would just make an ac game completely cutting the animus stories and setting the whole thing in present day for an epic animus-trained battle over the pieces of eden. But I guess now the templars just rule the world.

Feudal Japan right around them breaking their isolationist period is too perfect. I mean TOO perfect. End of the era of samurai in favor of industrializing? Oh hell friggin' yes. Could even have the first main release with a female protagonist. Who wouldn't wanna be a kunoichi or whatever the word for female ninja is. Either way, free running through a bamboo forest to throwing a friggin' shuriken into someone's brain stem? Yes please.

I'd go as far to say that Edward is the best assassins creed lead so far, he has the coolest appearance, awesome companions (ffs you're paired with a man who sticks cannon fuses in his clothes and lights them on fire to make it look like he was cast out of the depths of hell) most engagin story line and he's more relatable because he's not trying to be the good guy, he's just looking out for himself, which is a refreshing change from selfless heroes in games these days.

Wait, Escapist, why haven't you uploaded the newest video to your site yet? I'm feeling restless.

That line graph/stapler end bit really cracked me up

1:18 Am I a geek for recognizing the knife in bat-boxes hand to be the big-earner from Team Fortress two?

I have a friend who came up with an amazing idea for an AC game that takes place in Japan, right before or around the time that the outside world started to open Japan up. I told him he should try to contact Ubisoft with the idea but he refused and now I'm sad. TT_TT anyways, I'll admit that I agree somewhat with the overall review of AC4. The land parts were rather dull, except when I was busy raiding a plantation or smugglers cave. But the rest of the game was amazing, and it was really interesting seeing Edward actually develop as a character, something we never saw with Conner (and slightly Altair, as his development was really just his monotone going from arrogant to humble and that was it). Not only that, but AC4 could really tug at your heartstrings a few times. I was almost crying when we got to the end. Surprised he didn't mention the diving parts. *shudders* Honestly though, those diving parts freaked me out. I have a fear of drowning and sharks.

AC 1 was okay, AC 2 still the best AC game then comes AC 4 and Brotherhood while revelations and ac3 would't hurt even if they never existed tbh

That jazz hands bit actually killed my sides. FUCK.

I think you're awesome yahtzee, and your job (and rep) demand you to act like for want of a better word an arse, but nonetheless I don't get why people should go on about it "I'm sick off assassins creed making games blah blah blah" but to be honest there are many more fans (me included) that love the series and want more. It just feels like the gaming community nowadays feels the need to pick on certain games for making multiple ones, yet many people would gladly bleed through the anus for more of the games they like, maybe half life 3 for example :/ i just don't get why people just don't play or talk about the games they don't like :') still yahtzee your videos are awesome and I look forward to the next haha

Think all that laughter drained the forsaken air out of my lungs.

As some our saying feudal japan would be great for the assassin side of gameplay.

How awesome would it be if you could use your minion Assassins for the tailing missions. Then they give you the info, they gathered on the tailings and you plan out Assassinations your way.

Anyone come back after the disaster of Skull & Bones?

I'm pretty sure the next game will be about Haytham. I'm not saying I'm excited about it, but it seems that was the direction they are going. Ezio had 3 games, and the Kenways only have 2 to date. I'm sure theyre going for a Kenway trilogy.

It took another plunge

Just for reference: This is how he treated a game that he later named his #4 game of the year.

Is Rogue worth playing? I hear its similar to this.

Best PC game review I've ever seen. You could have added that from the first installment to the present, the height to which you're required to climb (and is thus available) has gradually decreased. Now it's reached sea level and I don't care to know what comes next.

Next thing you know, Ubisoft will actually make a game called Ass' Creed, where you play as a Donkey Assassin...

And what a linegraph it is. 7 years later and we're still doing this.

Why not Ubisoft make a game that’s all about piracy, instead of all this assassin’s creed. Forget the bridging future narrative, forget assassinations, let us free-roam around a gigantic map, hopping between land and sea, and raising hell wherever we desire.

To execute what you described in 4:14 you have to press Shift+E and forward. Then Edward jumps down.

you should do an episode with totalbiscit

mate i love you videos that is the third time i watch this one and still making me laughing.