This is the best breakdown of attachment styles i have ever seen. I feel much better knowing about all this information from this perspective. Thankyou
15:50 The part about secure people going back to equilibrium versus insecure starting the fans up again the next day was revolutionary to hear. My past experiences with a spice of lifer make so much more sense now.
I definitely relate with Spice of Lifer AND I had High anxiety for about year and half of pandemic after having covid and not wanting my mom whom I live with to get sick. And the political energy and collective ( and I'm HSP Empath) and the safest I felt was regular cuddling with weekly with my closest Rolling Stone friend... we were cut off. Then I got more anxious when she got More distant. My behaviors got more clingy in fear of abandonment and distrust with some of her behaviors and words (I think she was ashamed of her own needs of missing our connection) and then she Did cut me off after she went into more gaming and made new gaming friends. Sigh. But I've been doing inner work through that heartache and I feel less anxious and I also have other new connections. The isolation of pandemic was super damaging. My best friend had been back to work with people and I kept driving alone doing food delivery instead of giving massage because that's what felt safest. I'm back doing massage and see this friend once a week and she has Stonewalled me (which she did many times before) and it hurts but i can't do anything abt it. I've tried to have conversation and apologize but she says those attempts cross the Stonewall "Boundaries" and so she says I'm toxic and unsafe. Smh. I totally relate to needing much closeness and affection And value solitude as well.
Both myself and my Rolling stone friend are pretty self aware, but our dynamic had so many misunderstandings. I didn't realize how often I likely dissociate or did. And still do sometimes.
Hi Briana I find your videos very interesting and helpful to address our internal insecurities with external issues in relationships.Our behavioral responses to situations with partners and ourselves have such a impact on the inner work needed to become secure within ourselves.Thank you for your time and expertise on all the topics.
Thank you so much. It helps me to understand myself a lot. How can I fix my anxious attachment style at a body level to calm my nervous system? Please tell me. 🙏
The Dismissive Avoidant and the autonomic nervous system what impact does it make? How does one work through the Fear of Intimacy? Is a cognitive approack better? Can EMDR work in this situation? Thanks! Chuck
Thank you for watching and for asking. There are innumerable books and research articles. Most people start with the book “Attached” by heller and Levine. I review much of the research out there in my online courses, and for that most people start with my Attachment 101 courses. You can learn more about that when you take this quiz: onlinecourses.brianamacwilliam.com/attachment-styles-assessment
@brianamacwilliam.attachment thanks so much! I'll have a look at both. Very nice video by the way. It is helping me greatly to reconcile situations and relationships I'm currently going through
