Ren posted the below comment to about this song yesterday on his community page - if you haven't already go there and subscribe. "Now that there's so many new people here it's an opportunity to share songs that I released years ago that are still very close to me. This song is probably my favorite from the first ever album I put out It's called crutch. Weeks before I wrote this I had come out of multiple visits to the emergency room, I didn't know I had lyme disease yet and thought I was loosing my mind. To be transparent I was really scared being this sick, frail, crazy person would make me unlovable. My girlfriend Bibi at the time had been witnessing some of the hardest things I went through, and I was really scared it would push her away. I wanted to write something which put my fears to music, and this song was the end result. We filmed this during a cold October, when I was very underweight, but I wanted the video to be exposing, not shying away from the parts of me that repulsed myself. I think that's what's really powerful about art, it doesn't always have to be comfortable, and sometimes the things we think are really ugly, can be alchemised into something that contains beauty. Enjoy"
He wrote this one after going through a nervous breakdown in 2016 and was hospitalized several times. He was in a really deep dark place. I watched through his whole blog / documentary when he was going through his treatments and trying to heal himself. Not too long after this, he was asked to be a part of a documentary about M.E. ( Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ). He has a small part in the movie 'Unrest' where he also has one of his songs 'Patience'. The documentary was at the Sundance Film Festival in 2017. His part in the film was before he found out he had Lyme Disease. Thank you again for doing this reaction.
@@beardguyreacts This is the trailer for the film Unrest. You can hear Ren singing towards the end of the trailer and there is a small section of his blog that was included in the film. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-JvK5s9BNLzA.html
This hurts so much with every listen 🥺 but he is amazing for putting it out there. It helps so many people. I don't think that he can grasp how much of an impact he is making on people at the moment 🖤
Thank you for this one. Heart wrenching to actually see how much he had suffered and the agony he endured. There are very few humans that could go through that and express it so beautifully yet painfully and honestly to the world.
I found this track on RU-vid after watching Ren in the band the 'Big Push'....it has always been my fav of his...I could never understand why it was not more popular then it was cross fingers 🤞 after Rens 'Hi Ren' others will find it, and fall in love with it as I did.....
This song is so beautiful and painful. He never ceases to 11:48 amaze me . I had never heard of Bibi before. Her voice is so haunting and beautiful in this song 😢❤
Thank you for reacting to this. The only bad thing about this song is I want it to go on longer! So haunting, soul wrenching. My favorite piece from Ren.
A lot of people haven't got to this video yet, but they will, the numbers will rise. I can hope so. I had the feeling that she did not stay as his crutch, but then again, with Ren we can't be sure with his videos.
This one truly breaks my heart to see and feel him in so much pain. As always, whoever he collabs with compliments his voice so well. He has so much passion and pain in his voice. Like I said it breaks my heart. But, he is so damn good. That I sit here, waiting for it to be broken again and again.
3:08 Definitely, yes, in that he would feel ashamed because he wouldn't feel like he is enough of a gift to them, but that is ridiculous! What an incredible gift is the person of Ren.
I've just heard this Ren song for the first time...and here I am . Ren you are incredibly talented !! I never realised I need your music until I heard HI Ren two weeks ago . Thank you !
Please read the synopsis on the original video... Click on the title and Ren explains the background to this song and video... ❤️🇬🇧❤️ Thank you for doing this one... Xx
This is breathtaking... And your reaction is one I'll never forget ❤️❤️❤️ truly. ( As you can see it's only been 48 hours and I'm back 😂) BTW... The birds chirping in the background make my heart sing ❤️❤️❤️❤️
In reality, how many people in life really do find their crutch? Someone who loves you for you, and would never leave you side, NO MATTER WHAT. Especially in this day and age, people leave people over a FB like or something equally as trivial.
Top commentary mate. This is a beautiful and harrowing song. Seriously, this track wouldn't have seemed out of place on the likes of 'Pink Floyd's The Wall'
Great thought out reaction - I agree - can’t understand why so few views on this song - its hauntingly beautiful- and the photography- so simple and spare - like all his videos - no bells and whistles no cgi -- greetings from canada
9:15 unfortunately I have seen, more than once, a woman leaves a man specifically for the reason of his having an autoimmune condition. When I saw her disappear - heart = dead. If her answer was no then it was all conditional love after all, so much for in sickness and in health for such that would leave.
Too much pain and chaos to let much of his genius shine through here, for me. Full props for the usual mad courage and transparency and I absolutely respect his path to healing through this, but I’ll just say his arc of brilliance has to start somewhere and it’s understandable that your darkest time is probably when your art reflects that darkness the most. Ren teaches us to respect this part of the journey and dance tho so I still appreciate it though I probably won’t chase down every reaction like his others.
5:32 You mean I can trust you to stay loving me, through all the hell I'm going through??? SMH, I guess she is like the perfect dream every man has. Hope that dream comes actually true sometimes.
I've always related to this song. My perspective as someone who has suffered with painful autoimmune conditions and mental illness for decades: you NEED help, you WANT help, but you don't even understand exactly what help you need. You just know you need it. And you want someone to say all the things that Bibi says in the song, but that person doesn't really exist. She was never there.
@@user-xz6fj4lw2t Then what is your explanation? She said she'd stay, but left anyway? Because he was clearly just imagining he was holding her at the end.
In a livestream he once said that he broke up with his girlfriend in late 2016 so he moved out of the house that they lived together, that’s when he found Romain and they’d been room-mates until he left for Canada for his treatment in the begining of this year. And he also mentioned in an instagram story 2 years ago that he’s single at that time, so I supposed they went out but did break up
