Thanks Terri and Vanessa ❤. Yes,I agree 100%…being “seen” by parents is truly necessary. Let people be who they are instead of who YOU want them to be….this can go a very long way for softening the human condition.
What a beautiful lady with such wisdom. I was captivated from the first few seconds. Vanessa also looks just stunning with her silky silver hair. Thank you Terri for this brilliant conversation.
Thank you Terri Cole and Vanessa Cornell. This is very dynamic! I made that same boundary. The cult of selflessness resonates. I've raised 6 children over 30 years. I don't want to put this voice away anymore. I have recently become an empty nester and totally unprepared for what that would look like for me. I will say it out loud. This is important to teach to our daughters and grands as well. 🪷 💕
Man do I relate to this. When you subdue the actual self for the idea of you that everyone perceives it is so painful. I really resonate with the idea of fleeing and sitting in a cave. I too had to anchor myself to my children and also to my music to keep myself from floating away.
Thank you very much for this episode. I have been a subscriber for a while, but this really gelled. I listened 3 times B2B to absorb it all. I think I was misdiagnosed with postnatal depression when I was suffering from mum burnout. I had very little support, a highly critical husband and PTSD. Thanks again for deeply helping me dig through it all 😊
Thank you for yet another amazing video Terri ❤️ This was a brilliant conversation. I come from a south asian family and the rage when the realisation of over sacrificing and conditioning in cultural norms of doing so hits is too real. I still don’t know what to do with it sometimes. I would also like to request a video topic, if possible in the future about limerence. The stuff I keep finding and reading about either feels too dense for me to understand or too confusing. And once again, thanks for your content ❤
So glad it resonated ❤️ Have you tried honoring your anger? I have a few ideas for that in this video at the very end, near 17:30: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Gjt36s5zITo.html I also have a blog on it here (unfortunately the video's audio messed up): www.terricole.com/manage-honor-your-anger/ I'm going to be talking about codependency for a bit with my book launch, but what Qs do you have about limerence specifically? What are you hoping to find out?
@@terri_cole Thank you ❤️ I’ll be sure to check that out. In terms of limerence, I have struggled with anxious attachment in past and still healing from it. And I also tend to maladaptive daydream (for hours on end sometimes) I am not sure if I’m experiencing limerence when it comes to making up fake scenarios in my head about a person (ex or a new crush) or it’s just an escape mechanism to dream of a positive outcome when reality has disappointed. Also, a HFC here, so thank you for all that content. Looking forward to reading your book ❤️
Thanks for sharing that! I have a few interviews on my channel about anxious attachment that might help there: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-7nfBqg5kFyA.html & ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-XA0ASqtZ5Ic.html ❤️ What if you tried to look at the secondary gain of daydreaming? What do you get to not feel, not face, or not experience by dreaming of a positive outcome when reality has been disappointing? Or by dreaming, period? I touch on secondary gains in the context of dating a little in this video (might help): ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-cScMEiDMLlM.html Limerence tends to fade once a connection is made in real life, so with regards to your ex, it may be more of an escape mechanism, as you say. Fellow therapist Kati Morton has a video on it that might be helpful: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-1g3BQowUx4Q.html (Not a personal endorsement, just wanted to send you in the right direction and she seems to cover a lot of ground!) Thank youuu, I can't wait for Too Much to be out!! 💕
@@terri_cole You are so kind and amazing for all this information. I am studying psychology presently and you are truly one of my role models. Never stop doing what you do ❤️ So much love to you :)
Hi Terri, I love your videos and content so much. I wanted to thank you for giving us such valuable tools and guidance ❤ If it’s okay, I’d just like to give a little feedback, for some of us ADHD peeps, I sometimes find your nodding to guests in your videos a little distracting when constant, and it also appears like you’re mostly looking at yourself rather than your guest speaker. I’m not really sure why but both sometimes make you look insincere and I don’t think you intend to.