Cinematic Excrement: Episode 146 - Blonde 

Marilyn fixed herself a protein shake with a raw egg every morning. So yes, she knew how to break an egg.

It's interesting how Sean's Razzie Winner series started with a crazy biopic about the Village People and ends with a crazy biopic about Marilyn Monroe.

What a crazy ride through the Razzzies. Two presidencies, a covid lockdown, crazy international and local events, and series of movies that tested Sean's patience just our amusement. Brave man.

There's so much in Marilyn's life that was more interesting that wasn't even brought up in Blonde Big one is her friendship with Ella Fitzgerald and how Marilyn help Fitzgerald perform in segregated clubs as well as the two's bond overall being wayyyyy more interesting than Conspiracy Theories: Monroe Edition Anyways, I'll see you on the Worst Picture Retrospective when Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey probably wins

Congrats on completing your Worst Picture Project, Sean! It took five years, but I enjoyed watching and waiting for each new entry and it's nice to see you finally get through all those films. Eager to see what you do next on the show!

I’m just glad that Ana de Armas didn’t get nominated for a Razzie. Also, if you wanna watch a pretty good Marilyn Monroe bio, watch My Week With Marilyn.

Ana de Armas acts her butt off in this film. I WISH she had gotten to play a more accurate version of Marilyn because that would have been fascinating.

Marilyn deserved better.

Sean is one of the absolute goats of movie reviewers

Morbius should have won every award in existence at every award ceremony in existence because... it's morbin time.

To quote Frodo from Lord of the Rings, *_"It's done."_* At least until the Razzies announce the winner for Worst Picture of 2023. Wonder what it would be.

Why doesn’t anyone make a movie about how she started her own production company??? That would be far more interesting, less sexist and not trod out the same bullshit tropes we’ve heard about Marilyn over the years.

"No, the mistake was not me saying Justice League isn't a good movie" Well, if you mean the 2017 version, then I agree.

This is how I find out Birdemic: Sea Eagle actually got made.

I would love to see Sean's ranking of all the Worst Picture winners.

The fact you bring out a coat hanger at the end of this review after commenting on the weird-ass anti-abortion messages in the film caused my mind to go places.

Sean, again, thank you for doing this for our enjoyment.

I've been here since the Dirty Love episode was released. It's been a long wait, but the end is finally upon us. My hope is that Sean does reviews on all the movies that should have won but didn't, from Yor to North to Karen and Music. That would be cool.

Joyce Carol Oates has been publishing a novel per year since 1964 but I’ve never met anybody who’s read one.

Congratulations on actually pulling it off, and looking forward to your picks now that you're choosing what you want again instead of the idiots behind the Razzies.

I saw the original upload of this really late at night and I was very delirious. When I saw that it got removed, I was genuinely wondering if I dreamt it or not.

One slight correction I have is that Marilyn converted to Judaism later in life when she married Arthur Miller.

God, I hated this fucking movie. As beautiful and talented as Ana de Armas is, even she couldn't save this

The mistake made in the original release was Sean stating this film was the first NC-17 rated film he did, when he'd already done NC-17 rated films in this series prior. Showgirls, for example.

What a raspberry ride it's been.

Christ I felt like I was in the middle of a fever dream watching this film. The most bizarre movie I’ve ever seen.

I really gotta give you props for sticking through this to the end, but at the same time, I'm kinda glad this is it. I'll admit, while I have enjoyed this, I missed not knowing what you were going to review next.

Almost 6 years and you’re finally done with the Worst Picture winners! Whoooooooooooooo!!!!!!🎉 You did it, Sean!

Smeghead's Golden Rasperry Awards Worst Picture Project August 4, 2018-December 26, 2023 It has been such a long, wild and interesting ride that all started by Sean watching two horrible movies from 2017 that somehow sneaked by the Razzies: "The Snowman" and "The Book of Henry". Now it's time for him to begin 2024 by catching up on six years of bad movies.

If you thought 2022's Blonde was exploitative, wait until you hear of Redeeming Love, which was adapted from a novel that was published before Twilight.

Considering he'll have to resurrect the Worst Picture Project with whatever wins Worst Picture for 2023, I wonder what the "lucky movie" will be...

My Week With Marilyn is the best biopic about Marilyn Munroe. Granted it’s not technically her story, but it’s told from the perspective of someone who saw her as a person not the icon. Also Michelle Williams is fantastic in the role.

You deserve WAY more subscribers. This video is freakin hilarious!!!!!

Yeah, this movie makes Requiem for a Dream a happy movie...

Whoa. Deja Vu. **Hugs and hands you another drink** it's only human.

Noticed you corrected that N17 mention 0:52. Guessing you remembered Showgirls. Finally enough, that was the first video of yours I ever saw and I've been with you since Sean. Keep the great reviews coming mate 👍

I assume the police officer standing in the fire was also drunk.

The Saga is now complete

The End Of The Golden Razz Arc!!

Happy Late Holidays Sean and well done for finally finishing this Razzie Ride! 🎉🎉🎉

Peter Griffin would agree with me. It insists upon itself.

I was able to watch the original upload and I was surprised to see it disappear but I'm glad it was only to fix a mistake. Believe me, I know how it feels to make a small mistake and then completely redo something. Anyway, this has been one interesting ride through the Worst Pictures.

Thank you for proof the older Blonde exists! I have been trying to figure out what the heck that was since I was a kid. No context found.

This series has been wonderful viewing for me. Thank you. Please consider a similar one where you do Worst Adaptations from TV or Book, Worst SCi-Fi Based on a Good Concept, etc. Or even more traditional reviews of films from other eras. Some of your personal favorites, guilty pleasures, worst experiences, and the like. It's really your entertaining delivery that makes may day.

Congrats on finally finishing this five year long project, Sean!

“What the quack am I gonna do with myself?” Continue the cycle, Sean! Hollywood will continue dishing out drek, and we need you to spew your gold all over it! Happy holidays, man 😄

While it isn't perfect, 'My Week with Marilyn' is a much better film (with one of Michelle Williams' best performances in my eyes). I hope 'Blonde' just fades into obscurity and becomes forgotten like a lot of rubbish dumped on Netflix.

Congratulations on finally finishing the Razzie retroshpective, Sean! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

BTW Jackie Kennedy in fury pulled her support funds from a theater hosting 'After the Fall', Miller's veiled cheap-fest play about Marilyn. "...(abusing) that poor woman!" Jackie exclaimed.

Alright, Take 2. 5 long years we've been on this Worst Picture journey. And now, it's finally come to an end. Also, how much you wanna bet he's gonna do Birdemic 3 in the next review?

What a boxing day gift! We end this five year razzie run on a crazy Netflix biopic of Marylin Monroe! I am impressed! Also, I fear the people that thought Morbius was a good movie...

Congrats man, now this is what I call dedication, you deserve so many more subscribers. Now that this done, I'm glad to see you are hinting us on what movie you'll review next, and I already now what it is and I can't wait.

Hope you had a great Christmas Sean! Your angry rant at the parents was nine kinds of cathartic. More proof of why you're the GOAT

Thus, the Thousand Year Razzie War is over, for now. We can now go back to reviewing terrible movies regularly as well as ones for Xmas and Halloween.

Surprised with the Aspect Ratio, you didn't make a Transformers 5 joke

Hell, *I have ADHD* and Blonde hurts to look at. *PICK A RATIO, MAN!*

"What if a Disney princess film was written by monkeys?" I thought that was Charming....

Watching this now before anything else happens.

Another awesome review, Sean. I can’t believe you’re done with your Worst Picture project. Also, judging by the coat hanger you showed at the end, your next review is gonna be Birdemic 3, isn’t it? EDIT: Called it!

I’m actually happy he’s done with this project. I like not knowing what to expect on his roster.

Hard to believe this series started five years ago. Wow.

I feel bad for Ana de Armas. She had to bare it all for this pile of trash. She was literally being exploited. She is world class talent and I hope she got paid a boatload for her dignity.

18:32 - 18:37 Could honestly be called "Blonde in 5 Seconds" Also, Sean, congratulations on completing this long and difficult journey. I am sorry for all the bad movies and bloody pubic-hair pulling awful jokes courtesy of the Golden Raspberry Foundation, and I hope you had a Merry Christmas, and I would like to wish you a Happy New Year!

Congrats on finishing this series, Hope 2024 is the year we see some original stuff.

Really hope I can finish this before it's taken down again. Will you do the winner of next year's Razzies?

I was literally just thinking about this movie before I sat down at the computer. Weird timing.

I like how you had the segment about warning parents; when I found your channel I was twelve 😂

Mobius should’ve been nominated twice and everyone should’ve been allowed to vote for twice!

Hoping for a great new year for you. Your reviews are gems.

Thanks for all the videos. I love your sense of humor. I hope you do other projects.

I remember finding out about the novel when I read Voodoo Histories. I guess there's no surprise that a conspiratorial piece of dreck is the one that got the cinematic treatment. Your takes have kept me sane going into 2024, here's to many more!

From now on, I think every audience regardless of medium should henceforth be addressed as "Gentlemen, ladies and non-binary daisies" Great video as always, and thanks Sean for humanising Monroe in a way this movie clearly never could.

Congratulations on completion of the Razzie Project. Can't wait to see what you do next.

Alrighty!! A second dose!!🥰 I’m excited for what’s next after this one!

Cop: I see a drunk woman with a small child driving through a fire...I guess I will turn her around. Brilliant move

At least until you get to Winnie The Pooh Blood and Honey soon! It's the next Worst Picture winner until next year!

Well done and congrats on completing this insane task! (and thanks for not glossing over the insane baby stuff… wtf was that)

Holy shit! We did it! As someone who subbed super early on, it feels pretty satisfying to be here. I only watched but I'll pretend I was an important part :P

7:13 No wonder why the movie called Joe DiMaggio, The Baseball Player because Netflix would likely get sued by his family

I couldn't help but laugh at the baby talking scene.

When can we expect a review of United Passions or Strange Magic?

Seen this 3/4 times since this was released. So much fun, and funny, and the commitment to even watch the previous version of the movie. Almost makes me want to watch them just to check out what's up for myself. ... Almost. I wonder if a massacre your darlings cut down version of Blonde (this one) would work better. Or... be easier to get thru.

Thank you for this series! I waited with bated breath each month to catch these reviews. I will say this, now you can go back to Roland Emmerich and Transformers movies. 🤣🤣🤣

Sir I am so proud of you and your work the fact that you've been committed to this for like 15 years or more or whatever it's been is crazy and awesome and so much respect my man.. if I could commit for something like you did for as long as you did besides like drinking and drugs.. I would be proud of what you have accomplished .. not only are you funny as shit You started something and you didn't stop You said it go and you stuck with it I wish so bad I could have started this journey with you man... But needless to say I am a type of guy that loves to just been binge watch the whole first season this second the third and just don't have to wait 15 years to do it but hey man mad respect brother mad respect I'm about halfway through your shit I don't have to watch a few of them over again cuz I fell asleep to your sweet serenade of your sarcastic voice. I've actually been watching all your videos on my other RU-vid handle Henry Famerton. I just got on my old phone just to give you another sub bro. So I can't wait to hear like what you want to do now that you've got this I know you'll do the razzies you know every year you know up to date but I'm wondering like what what is it what what is it now what are we going to be doing man what can we look forward to I haven't finished this video yet for all I know you actually say all of this like at the end or something but I'm just too excited what's next buddy what is next I mean shoot you could do whatever you want to do man I like you know instead of just doing risees how about like the way you cover all of these you know razzy's like how you do like a like a retro respective. You could just start doing deep dives on all of your favorite movies all of your hated movies you know 25 35 45 minutes long favorite movies hated movies movies and never should have been made movies that should be made movies that here's everything they should have done here's everything they shouldn't have done I don't know man the possibilities are endless and I can't wait to see what you do God bless.. P.S. I did all of this on talk to text. And most the time it doesn't know what the hell I'm saying and shit comes out wrong more often than it should. I bet majority of it came out completely like ass backwards and it doesn't make sense but I just you know I couldn't type all this shit out cuz I was too excited and I just had to get it out man I had to get it out of my system.. wireless fresh in my mind soon as you said I've reached the end of my journey that's crazy man cuz I've been watching you for like fucking I started with all your old videos and shit and I'm just you know pushing forward man pushing forward I'm catching you know catching a few ones in the middle here there later or whatever but I am telling you bro I'm looking forward to whatever else you want to do Brother. P.P.S. I think all your subscribers should just take a moment of silence, and then just scream as loud as you can.. Thank you smeghead..!!!!! and Hollywood you can suck it.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttttttt..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Weird not to say that De Arma's performance was a Oscar-nominated one, since sometimes reference that stuff. Having rewatched all the mixes of styles that Dominic used in this movie make me appreciate the work and craftmanship done by Bradley Cooper in Netflix's (also) Maestro.

Its still on my watchlist...looks like I HAVE to watch it now..

Your original upload was taken off to fix a minor mistake. I thought RU-vid took it down for being too explicit.

Any reason why Paws of Fury wasn't nominated for the Razzie considering that it had a trouble production and cheap production values comparable to Foodfight?

In 2021, Ana de Armas played Marilyn Monroe. In 2023, Carey Mulligan played Leonard Bernstein's Latina wife. Should have been the other way around.

Appreciate your videos always

When Sean was talking about the winners and losers of the 2023 Golden Raspberries; he should have mentioned that Adria Arjona didn't deserve the Golden Raspberry for Worst Supporting Actress.

The long pauses in black and white reminded me of Under the Cherry Moon. Combined with the callbacks to Mommy Dearest, this kinda fits as a wrap-up of the Razzies so far. -Teo

Are you going to do a Razzie once a year from now on?

In Dominik's defense, his second movie "The Assassination of Jessie James by the Coward Robert Ford" is pretty damn good.

Neat! I have been bunge watching your videos and I just subscribed today. P.S I'm an editor with ADHD, but I'd like to think I would do a better job editing a movie.

Looking forward to what's next!

So are you gonna review Fahrenheit 11/9, Cuties, Corona Zombies, and/or Lady Ballers

I was not prepared for the surprise Dean Winchester appearance.

the aspect ratio and color shifts in Blonde remind me a lot of Thirteen Days' constant shifts between color and B&W footage - and they're about as arbitrary

My mom actually wanted to see this movie, but after hearing about all the dark stuff, she opted out of it. Yeah, I think she made the right decision.