Crossdressing Autogynephilia or NO? | MtF Transgender LGBTQIA+ 

Because women have spent more than 100 years fighting for that freedom. 100 years ago, a woman had to have VERY compelling reasons to be allowed to wear trousers in public (parachute jumping is an example I know of)

@@thiloreichelt4199 Feminazi fool, stop playing the victim, it is men who were/are used as disposable objects (War etc).

@@thiloreichelt4199 Indeed.

Society it is. We have to be more common so that if anyone says why we are doing it we can give them 10 more names rather feeling shame cause you have never seen anyone like you in IRL and feel lonely

@@thiloreichelt4199 u lost me, on parachute jumping. Plz explain?

Stories like yours make me say "okay. Being trans is a thing and good for her" but honestly when I read other trans people talking about wearing their mothers underwear it makes me recoil in horror. I wish their was more of a middle ground.

I can relate. When I looked in the mirror I stood and stared for a while.

Heads up, novel incoming: First time for me I was 12 when I wore a girls hoodie I had asked my parents to buy for me every day, even at school. When I was home alone one day idk why I just kinda did it, and started doing it a lot. I would lock my door and wear it as basically like a minidress. Pull my arms up through like the neck part, tie the sleeves behind my back, zip it up, stuff socks in where the zipper stopped to simulate breasts. I had started to hate pictures around 5 or so I stopped smiling for them, but this first time and even all those other times I wore that hoodie as a dress I took SOOO many pictures of myself it was like a dang photo shoot. Then I'd just like play videogames, sometimes fall asleep wearing that wake up to my mom knocking on the door to wake me up for the bus. "Why was your door locked?" 🤭 But yea Ive been heavily repressed because of not only bullies growing up, but my dad once said something about a neighbor kid about my age that was cross dressing in his mom's clothes and walking past the house, my dad made some kind of negative comment and I knew it was bad that I wanted to do that (I was maybe 6 when this happened) So I always kept it a secret. But yea I never showed those pictures to anyone.. Since I didn't have any real safe methods to dress Infront of anyone to explore things more basically the only method I had to dress comfortably in front of people was by meeting guys and doing it behind closed doors. I figured out that, I could care less what I wear for smexy times. It's more about how I'm treated for that kind of excitement. But yea I thought it was just a kink cause of internalized shame for a bit, but I started to question that pretty much immediately given that it started non sexual for me when I was a lot younger. Then once a friend I was staying with kind of called me out about not being horny and wanting smexy time even when I dress up, it was like yea, just cause I dressed cute doesn't mean I wanna play. I just like wearing the clothes during my everyday life I feel more comfortable in my skin and I can't put it any other way. And honestly I don't like any clothes that doesn't hide my masculine traits, like I would not wear something that makes me look like a man crossdressing, I prefer big floofy skirts and dresses that round out my shape and make my body look more feminine. I'm not on hormones yet for context. If I had a more feminine body, then maybe I'd have the confidence to wear tighter and more revealing clothing. Maybe. I'd have to see how dysphoric the clothes make me. Like if I look in the mirror and see like a Marilyn Manson instead of my authentic self, it makes me wanna drag my file over the recycling bin and empty it, then run a magnet over the hard drive and toss it in and incinerator. Otherwise known as self delete. It's even worse in masculine clothing and if I let body hair and facial hair go.. I used to be toxically angry about the girls I dated wearing tight clothing and makeup, at the time I didn't realize it was because I was jealous of them.. Also I've never really approached a woman. Every one I've dated approached me from what I recall. I have however approached guys, and I often find myself attracted to straight guys. Not attracted to gay guys at all. No offense they can be great. I tried it out it wasn't for me. Bi guys are tons of fun tho. Anyways.. My best friend actually was a guy I approached that turned me down because hes straight. I can remember very clearly the thought of "if only I was a woman this man could've been mine" I've been talking with a professional and recently got diagnosed. I'm sure you can guess with what.. 😅 Anyways that's enough sharing publicly, for the month I think. Wishing you well and hoping everything is going good with your journey. 🩷

😭😭 wearing your own clothes, and not someone elses, is just so liberating

Omg thats so cute

Hot!!!! So glad for you and love to hear you're both fans!!!!

@@AshleyxAdamson now i am finally on hormenes i am looking foward to growing my tits.

@@AshleyxAdamson bit sure where I fit. I'm not transgender but I'm atracted to trans women in the same way I'm atracted to other type of woman. But for different reasons.. transgender women in particular seem to highlight more feminine. traits. It could be an insecurity in my own masculinity that is validated by a person who asserts their feminity. What's your take on men who are like me . And conversely do some trans women seek overtly masculine men to feel More female

@@notsure1405 From what I've heard from other trans women (and as one myself) the main issue with "chasers" is that they fetishize the things that make them not cis (e.g. genitals). Most of us just want to be seen as women and treated as women. We don't want to be treated as freaks or as men. So I think it's okay for cis men to be attracted to trans women if they see them and treat them as a woman.

Same here..but me it was my mothers lingerie...it made me feel soft calm right..it was not about anything sexual but feeling right at that moment of who I was

Yr parents effed you up

@@dannyd7211 people like you make it hard for people like me to take your community seriously. Seriously...

@@sirennoir258 I am sorry you feel that way, but most of us are good people, we dont want anything bad to happen to you and just have good will towards you.This is how I was raised, I was bullied and beaten up on a regular basis alway thru school because of my medical issue, when I got to dating age I had parents beat the shit out of me because they did not want their daughters to catch what I had.

@@whitewolf8458 see and that is what I don't get. I don't think you should be beaten up. You deserve to live a normal, boring, everyday rat race life like anyone else and not be bothered. I think its disgusting to infringe in your right to be you. I think that hatred is a filthy disease of humanity to do this. Violence is never okay. However when I read things like people stating they wore their mothers underwear, or they want to transition children I get really defensive. Also I know a so called trans kid who, after HRT has now detransed and is a lesbian again. Do you understand what I'm getting at without sounding hateful?

But your clothes don't make you who you are .

​@@kimmmwest4641they help us feel like what we are!

openSUSES5, You worded that so well.

it doesnt fails at all if u read anne lawrence definition of agp, becoming what we love

@@alemusicgirl I did read that paper. I think she's stretching Blanchard's definition too much. I think the term needs to be retired. Self-eroticisim is simply a common experience for many trans women, particularly in the beginning when gender expression is repressed. It doesn't need to be more than that.

@@openSUSE5 self-eroticism is also experienced by cis women

​@@ms.aelanwyr.ilaicoshow?

It's a difference between stimulation and sexual arousal.. people don't ride roller coasters because it turns them on sexually.

How much of men’s lives are spent ruminating about their sexuality, whether they are gay or not? TOO MUCH!

​@@carlabroderick5508 what are you yapping on about?

Your mother's clothing? May I ask a question because I'm trying here. You wore your mom's underwear. That is not normal. I hope your experience isn't the normal trans experience.

​@@sirennoir258 it's not the "normal" trans experience, but it isn't exactly wrong either. Most of the transwomen I know have said they either used their sibling's clothes or bought their own but about about with 13 year olds.

@@mycelia_ow You guys are indeed degenerates.

@sirennoir258 I honestly don't think it has anything to do with the person they are borrowing the clothes from. At those young ages people just grab what is available to them. I wouldn't imagine that those same people continue borrowing their mother's items once they can afford to buy their own.

What's the study? Can you share a link?

sweetheart please realize that AGP and such is a normal part of a complex process. You are not gross or weird for having a sexually gratifying experience through your sexual exploration of femininity and how it applies to yourself. It makes you happy to be a girl. i think it makes sense to derive pleasure that way, no? Because you're a girl, it only makes sense you would feel good, happy and excited.

When you say “exciting”, you mean “sexually exciting”, right? You realise no actual woman would ever get physically aroused by wearing a pair of jeans, right?

This is a very important part of the conversation, and one of the major critiques of Blanchard. If trans women are just having experiences analogous to the experiences cis women, there's really no need to pathologize that.

Because someone clothes are sexy that doesn't mean u get sexually aroused by wearing yo daddy underwear

@@ms.aelanwyr.ilaicos it's not similar at all ... Sexy clothes make u feel sexy... That's not like putting on yo mama dress and getting sexually aroused

@@kimmmwest4641 The literature disagrees with you 🤷🏻‍♀️

@@ms.aelanwyr.ilaicos the Bible disagree with me too what's your point ?

Sorry I don't mean to offend you in any way but if you only could read what you've written .it's delusional . It's an illusion you're describing .90% woman? Dresses and make up don't make you a woman .

Gender envy really rang a bell for me. I so wanted to be a girl when I was a young boy. I "borrowed" female clothing whenever I could, and yes, I was envious of the girls.

@@qlnbd This is exactly what I think Blanchard gets wrong. He starts his theory at the moment of arousal and never mentions the inclinations that came before. I too was enticed by the envy not the eroticism.

@@RobisonRacing68 i started wearing girls clothing long before puberty. There was zero arousal. It was a need to be a girl. I dont even know if need is the right word. I KNEW I should have been a girl and wearing girls clothing was all I could do. Sure, in my early teens arousal played a part but that was a short lived phase - i was pretty flooded with hormones at the time. 😁

@@qlnbd Exactly!!

At the end of the day it sup to the person to figure it out some men and women simply get aroused wearing the other genders clothes and don’t fell that they are transgender and just see them selves and a man or a woman that likes wearing other genders clothes

@@bepitan not an autogynephile and never have been. AGP =/= transgender. Is this something you have a personal experience with?

I am a lifelong crossdresser and fully understand this. I get hot seeing myself become feminine.

It’s a logical conclusion when you’re so stupid you have to look for single points to separate trans women into different categories. Like of course I didn’t like pretending to be a man in sexual situations. I was basically crossdressing as a man and dating women. But I didn’t know how to be the man lol.

Also personally I believe that sexualising ourselves crossdressing is a form of escapism, or a way to actually percieve gender euphoria when all other options are seemingly closed. It starts with sexualisation because that is the only way you are able to adequately live out your desires before you are capable of understanding what's going on and coming out. So a form of coping, I guess and outlet, in a private sphere, where you can feel like a woman, since our culture already sexualises the crap out of women.

Agree with both of you. The other factor is that natal males have a naturally high libido, so it's no wonder they experience these things in a sexual way.

So you are saying that you think all cross dressing is escapism for people who are trans and in denial?

@@bperez8656 Where was that implied?

@@bperez8656 For trans people who don't have any other option of expressing their identity yeah, but like you can still not be trans and just crossdress because you enjoy it. But if you are trans, crossdressing is a way to experience gender euphoria when other options are closed off.

What surgery are you looking to get ?

@@bperez8656 my GRS surgery.

LOVE LOVE LOVE TO SEE THIS

Wow Quinn, that is exactly my one main worry, already for years! Does my seeing myself as a (trans)woman and my wanting to be a woman mean that I am, in fact, a transwoman? And is my being a transwoman enough that I should transition? I am due to start on hormones next month, at the rather late age of 49!! But socially I have been in transition for many years. In the end, I've found it impossible to be the man that others and I expected me to be. But this realisation took many many years to come to, in part because of my internalised transphobia, my fear of being autogynaphilic, and my fear of the impact that coming out and transitioning would have on my life. This realisation was the result of thousands of small steps and experimentation, increasingly taking on the role of the woman that I felt I was, over years and decades. Until it became blatantly obvious and undeniable that I am a transwoman, to the point that I could no longer argue otherwise to me or my wife (now ex, sadly). I think that it is important that, if you have doubts, you take small steps and experiment, just like a child and teenager would in their journey to discover themselves! It is really no different. Unfortunately, for many of us (trans or otherwise experiencing questions about our gender identity and sexual preferences), we simply don't feel safe enough to experiment and to discover ourselves. I know I didn't when I was younger, and I lost my marriage when I couldn't keep it hidden away any more...

Agreed!

I think this way to, I like a cuddle and a kiss way better than the sex. Sex to me is a relief but making love is pleasure.

Wow you are the first person I've ever seen in a comment section explain clearly what I think most of us "AGPs" are experiencing. We are becoming what we love. I love myself. I see myself (and the template of myself, as the perfect partner). I love femininity, extremely, like it's deeply embedded in me; so by that effect, not only am I compulsively forced, in my application of my own perfection, would see me as a girl, that would be the ultimate partner. seeing myself with beautiful breasts, and in my case, I actually prefer a penis. so essentially me as embodying the feminine entirely. I think it has a lot to do with being Autistic. I also have a meta sexuality. I'm also autosexual and with the merit of the metahypersexuality (which my theory is that i was instilled with this from my Autism, my male gender + the presence of testosterone, which gave me this complex sexuality.) combine these effects and like you said it's infinite. I would find myself reaching orgasm almost immediately and felt like a stacking effect in certain situations of sexual feminine exploration that's meta self directed

And the part about saying it out loud was 2 days ago...I am 63

None of that makes you actually female. Speaking as someone who is, and who's for female sex based rights? I wish you would just stay in your lane, and not pretend like any of this stuff makes you actually FEMALE. Because I mean, why do you have to?? You can enjoy your kinks in private, with or without a consenting partner(s). You can wear whatever you like. You can grow out your hair and put on makeup. You can call yourself by whatever name you want. You can perform femininity to the Nth degree. You can enjoy traditionally feminine hobbies, and have a traditionally feminine personality, if indeed you do. And yet..? Absolutely none of this makes you FEMALE! Why can't you instead fight to expand the category of "male", and what that can look like? Because by definition, that's what you are. MALE. Even if you have dysphoria..? You're still male, regardless! Doesn't make you magically female, and I wish you would stop pretending! Because you guys pretending as if it does..? Is EXTREMELY harmful to actual women, to confused minors that are getting sucked into this ideology, and just generally to society! And people are reaching their breaking point, and peaking, all over the place! Whereas if you instead HONESTLY said: "I am a male who's got dysphoria, and experiences such and such"? Or even: "I'm a male who's got a fetish"? I think you would find, you would get a LOT more sympathy from people like me, who no longer buy this.

@@InterstellarDreams you say "all over the place" but you have no idea just how tiny the trans population is. This doesn't affect you. Please educate yourself.

What does feeling like you SHOULD wear something feel like ? Like when it's cold and u feel u should wear a coat?

Alright so I watched the rest of the video. So I want to first say that I don't consider Blanchard to be an omniscient truth sayer. He could 100% be wrong with his whole theory. I'll however go somewhat devil's advocate and say that everything that you've described has been addressed with counter arguments by Blanchard himself and by Anne Lawrence. So basically the explanation is that the autogynephelia is what you initially experience, but it matures into a full blown gender identity over a duration of time. Also the sex drive of a hormonal teenage boy and a medically transitioned trans woman are completely different. A teenage boy's sex drive is absolutely ferocious, but with age and cross sex hormones, the sex drive in most trans women is significantly more tame. That certainly has been my experience. Also think about how pair bonding with a couple works. It starts off very passionate and very sexual, but eventually it turns into a more companionate relationship that's more tame with time. So according to Lawrence and Blanchard, you're basically "pair bonding" with your new gender identity and new existence, and it's no longer a fiercely sexual desire, but more soft and loving. Their research showed that although the sexually charged desire to be womanly does seem to dissipate, the gender identity will persist. Also the thing that you described about starting off as a straight man and now you're a straight woman. An inversion from experiencing exclusively gynephilic to experiencing exclusively androphilic attraction to others is well documented and not uncommon in trans women. The reverse happens in trans men often too. While such a reversal in sexuality has been observed, the reason why is not known, but Blanchard has what he feels is a good explanation. Blanchard's explanation for this is something called "meta attraction". It's also his explanation for bisexual trans women like myself. Meta attraction is when you use the man as a proxy for your own sexual self attraction. So by being subjected to sex by a man, it makes you feel womanly and sexy about yourself for fulfilling this normative female role, but having sex with a woman makes you feel masculine and yucky. This is an area where I disagree with Blanchard the most. He believed that male bisexuality just wasn't a thing. His research was largely centered in the late 80s and the 90s. However later research from some, including from his colleague Michael Bailey has shown that bisexuality in AMABs is very much real. And while I do somewhat experience what he described where men make me feel more sexy about myself more than women do, I also find men's bodies often to be very desirable and nice to ogle.

Back in boy mode you didn't look at hot attractive women and think damn I wish I could be her? That is me in my early transition. With hormones and transitioning I expect this to change.

@@timothygibney159 You know what? I did have some jealousy of women when I was younger. I learned of a female's monthly cycle and wished , oh god, I wished it for myself. I saw many attractive women as a young person but was only envious of their bodily functions and not their looks.

@@jimileecrawford7731 That is the vibe I got from her. Like her I m pretty straight in boy mode. I would stare at women and not only want to be them but felt calm feminine energy. It did have an arousal component but was because of an admiration. I was an ugly boy so no arousal for myself. I totally get her and wonder if I will like men soon if I go on E and view myself as a woman and that finally goes away. That I think is what is meant by this autogenophelia. I certainly have this and yes wish I had girl parts too ... Okay maybe not the menstrual pains lol

@@timothygibney159 Autogynephilia is a defunct theory. Trans women don't exist solely for their own sexual arousal. I certainly don't. Of course I do get aroused but it is only with my partner and is never self directed. I can't look at myself in a mirror and think ' I'd fuck me' Like some reject from a Jodi Foster movie. No, my 'desires' are not related to my parts, far from it. Do I wish that I was not trans: yes. Do I wish that I could hear children: yes Do I get turned on by being a woman: no I'm simply a woman, albeit a trans woman and that is a fact that I just accept. Autogynephilia is not a term that I would apply to any trans woman, it is borderline an insult and denies your actual nature for fetishism. My friend, self respect is key for our growth don't fall for this pseudo scientific jargon. Much love and hope, okay? ❤️

Talented as females? Now being female is considered a talent? That's extremely insensitive and misogynistic thing to say. Being a woman is not an occupation or a role. It's a biological reality and one which is not easy considering that misogynistic people exist.

Exactly. Same here. Borrowing someone else’s clothes seemed like such a greater turn on as if you were, putting them on. (Sounds like I’m borrowing from a movie we know) but buying your own clothes it becomes more real. These are after all now your clothes. This is just what you wear. You feel more genuine.

Me Too.

It is not a bad word to the LGBs. It is a bad word to the straight males that have it.