I have too many vines on my person... so I channel them back into videos... because I’m a Meme-loving trashcan... Music: The magnificent Gavioli fairground organ, The Troubador - • The magnificent Gaviol...
Chaotic good people don’t question the weird stuff that happens Chaotic neutral people do question the weird stuff that happens Chaotic evil people cause the weird stuff that happens
Bruh, I would pick every single evil option I could just to fuck with the party. Chaotic evil is where its at bby. Contractor NPC:"If you kill this man I kill give you 20 bucks"*points thumb at guy behind him* Me:"ok" Rest of the party:"what the hell are you doing?" Me:*stabbing the guy in the chest repeatedly"GETTING DOLLA"I post 5 karma(yes this is fallout now)
7:17 Oh god this happended in a game I was DM'ing for. They got ambushed by pirates and then the fight got called off when the pirate PC realized holy shit this other pirate was like his surrogate father.
Some clerics don't worship Jesus. Some clerics have minor alcoholism, drunk partied in the fey woods for 2 weeks, got blessed as a champion by the fey king Oberon and worship the forgotten sun god Lathander.
2:13 this actually happened in i campaign i was in.. we had to cooperate to intimidate a miniboss and someone in the party had the same idea. Everyone agreed to it, and EVERYONE rolled a nat 19 or 20, so we pulled it off FLAWLESSLY. The miniboss looked at all of us just doing this and slowly backed away.
6:38 the best part about this vine in particular is the fact that one of my characters is both a tiefling and a warlock and it is so accurate holy shit!
Okay, everyone listen up, I'm gonna change your lives. There is a mug. With a tiefling on it. With a teacup being thrown at it. The caption says tea-fling. You're welcome.
story time: I remember when me and my buddies were playing dnd and we had to get down a steep hill. Half of us used a rope and took damage from a land slide, while the rest of us (including myself) decided to create a human tumbleweed and rolled to the bottom safely
8:37 i started a campaign of d&d recently, on our first mission we found over 19,000 coins (they weren't all gold but that doesn't matter) we had 4 party members and could only carry 1600 coins between us. 1600 out of more than 19,000. Let's hope there's not some big boss there when we go back to collect the rest... *but seriously, first expedition, we were only half-way through the DM/GM's dungeon, and we got more than 1100x the max amount of gold we could carry in our backpacks.*
6:53 my Dragonborn sorcerer after following our tiefling bard up a mountain where they were going to talk to a dragon that we really didn’t need to talk to, then failing 4 dex checks in a row to not fall and then to save myself 3 times, then hitting the ground 40 feet below, getting knocked out because we were level 1, then left behind by the bard and another party member came up to save him but couldn’t get down to him safely, and failing death saves. Kinda worked out though because now I’m playing a cool as hell barbarian that gets a wild magic effect when he rages and kills people by body slamming them. I got the teleport effect when I raged and after using it to evade enemies twice I decided to see how I could make it an attack, so I teleported 10 feet above my enemies and body slammed then before attacking.
6:19 My wizard was in the rafters of a tavern during a barfight and cast catapult on a tankard at an evil monk/cleric dude and he just nat 20d redirected that tankard at ME in the rafters, and this gave me a nam-flashback to that.
Once I played a very small campaign to introduce two of my friends to D&D. One of which immediately looked for vodka-- no other alcohol. When they were under attack by a pair of hellcats, one fought and the first (vodka) fucking stood there. Kudos.
On my third time playing, the DM put our 5 man squad in a huge cloud of fog. And, there were 2 panthers with sharp tentacles. I am a paladin, so I tried to smite one of them. I rolled a nat 1 and the thing ate my hand and my sword. So, I tried again with a dagger in the other hand. DM said if I rolled nat 1 again, he would take my other hand. Another nat 1 later, the DM apologized and said he was joking. The party voted to take my hand anyway, so they did. I then grabbed a shortsword in my mouth and killed one. Then, after the other was dead, I cut the things open and got my weapons back. Then, a baby panther with tentacles ate my hands before I could get them back. Now, the DM is working with the Artificer to make me some homebrew steel gauntlet hands. TLDR: Hands taken by 2 nat 1s, getting better ones soon.
random storytime that I hope will make someone happy: so we did a little oneshot goof session and it was *_chaos._* it ended in our dm doing one of the best mr. rogers impressions, saying "welcome to my neighborhood, roll initiative." and her annihilating us.
When you're a big, beefy, tank-y dragon-born paladin and your party needs to roll stealth checks and you're the only one who succeeds: What kind of fuckery is this?!
4:03 me in my head, when my friend's character started stealing whiskey while a fucking lightning bolt was being attracted to anything dealing with "safflower".
One time a party in a campaign I played in accidentally summoned a demon while trying to summon a genie instead. In our defense, we couldn’t find any CRAM, so we had to resort to potatoes
tbh the best campaign i had was when it was setted in kind of ancient greece and i played a cleric of the god Dionysos, the god of wine and insanity, and my character didnt want to be cleric bc backstory and was only one because Dionysos was fucking (not literally) with him and everytime he had to use divine power i was like "hey you drunk fuck, i think it's time again to spill some of your ass glitter to look good" no need to mention that PC and Dionysos were constantly drunk
I might use the Bard/Druid combo for something later on(bard for the music and various effects the music can give off and the druid for talking to animals).
6:28 once we where trying to seal through a giant temple full of our enemies during a campaign and everyone got a good role for sneaking, except for two people who might as well have cartwheeled in screening sneak.
Yesterday my friend (our fighter) slammed a door in this shopkeeper's face, rolled a nat20, knocked him out cold, his wife freaked out and called the guards, our rogue sneaked out of town, our fighter distracted one of the guards by making a hat, rolling a nat1, and proceeding to completely undo the hat within minutes, and I, a bard, first ran to the back exit, then went back to hide in boxes (which failed horribly) , ran back to the exit, went back to the other side of the room to make sure we didn't murder the shopkeeper, played dead in the hopes of narrowly getting arrested, rolled out of the door, accidentally shut the door on the shopkeeper's head, got caught by a guard, narrowly escaped arrest by casting Tasha's hideous laughter, performed for the townsfolk, and then left town. And then we got our asses handed to us by some shrubs.
Once I was playing Warlock, and we recruited a cleric of Cthulhu NPC to are Cthulhu cult. We had a character who kept killing everyone and killed a guard. 4 guards chased us back to are sky ship and so we killed them and used them for my ritual. The NPC was sleeping so she didn’t witness the murders. I had such a good relationship, and charisma that I convinced her someone dumped the body’s on the ship, so for the next few deception checks I made to her I had advantage. We gave the body’s to the city graveyard so she wasn’t suspicious, the owner was suspicious and alerted the guard. We left her there because it was her home island, and the DM was tired of having an NPC in the party, but she was a seen with are party multiple times...I still don’t know what happed to her and I hope she didn’t get accused of murder
So, here's the story of how we royally messed up in the last battle (we still won, but it was bad) We were inside a half sunken ship. Water up to our waists. So, our cleric, the only one with healing spells, was paralyzed and almost dead. The rest of the party were occupied in fights. I had to carry her up the stairs. I lifted her, and heroically started my way over to the stairs. About three feet from there, I got paralyzed as well, falling face first into the water, dropping the cleric into the water, almost drowning her. We ended up with one of the party members dead, all of us less than half hp. It was bad. By the way, I was tabaxi bard
That one captioned "that one pc with to much money" reminded me of the time one of my party members bought 6000 ball berrings and gave them out to the rest of the party. Each person getting an amount according to how much he liked you 1 berring = 100 love. He gave most everyone 1/2 to 2 and gave his love intrest npc the rest. He then tried to convince the dm to let him spend his remaining 6,000 gold peices on approximately 60,000 ball bearings. When the dm denied his request he had a fit and explained how his character emptied his entire coin bag on to the floor. It was strange.
4:05 when my group started our first campaign we were hunting Kobalts and the Barbarian left and just about fucking died. So now we don’t split the party. Ever.
I imitated the koolaid man with my 7 1/2 foot tall warforge, I then spent an hour building a new better wall for that mans house and when the guards asked why I did that said it wasn't up to code.
Storytime I have a rouge tefling who has low social status and she has major anxiety. Well a priest cake up to her and called her the devil and her best friends (spell casters) and they burned down the village XD all for her as she S C R E A M E D
Ok, some weird shit here. I was just watching some of these for laughs but an hour ago I'd legit forgotten what Shakira's name was, and this video reminded me. Universe's wires are crossing man.
