You have no idea what this channel means to me and others. I have always been afraid of being seen as even slightly feminine and not acting 100% masculine. This video made so much sense. Why the hell am I trying to put on a show for a crowd that wants to see who I am? Men should encourage each other to become successful in their own way and definition of the word. I have been questioning most things about life, after going through suicidal thoughts a few weeks ago in a real rough patch (its better now), its really made me think, why did I think it was worth ending it instead of pushing through? Is who I am who I want to be, who I imagine my ideal partner would want to be with? You are more 'man' than most people I know, because you are willing to be yourself, not a stereotype or a group. After seeing what you have been through and what you have overcome, you have some pure wisdom and experience. I know its not much but I have never felt like someone has truly earnt a like and a subscription more than this. Keep doing what you are doing. ps. my channel name is a joke I'm not trying to be a 'sigma male' I find the whole thing rather funny.
This channel is a gem. Another video you may be interested in is DarkMatter's Debunking Redpill as well. It's long as heck but he speaks a lot of truths so it's worth it IMHO.
@@blessings-stranded FEMININITY-DEFINITION/MASCULINITY-DEFINITION/FEMINITY-MASCULINITY/FEMINITY-MASCULINITY-DYNAMICS/EVOLUTIONARY-FEMINITY/EVOLUTIONARY-MASCULINITY/EGO-SYMBIOSIS/FEMINITY-YING/MASCULINITY-YANG/YING-YANG-TEAMWORK/FEMINITY-MASCULINITY-TEAMWORK [They are states of mind, and both can be switched at a given notice; depending what a situation requires. A person's neuro-personality is what determines one's alignment to either masculinity or feminity, e.g. XNTJ is a 'largely' masculine neuro-personality type/brain-formation. INFJ is odd; the gender-focus (masculinity/feminity dynamics) is in reverse, depending on the gender and yet it is still [consciously] malleable (depending on the individual and the current situation; mirroring/personality adaptation can aid one to better adapt to a given situation with success, i.e. with little needles resistance). Evolutionarily speaking, the psychological dynamics of feminity-masculinity aids individual units (within the human colony) to better organise themselves within a 'team-structure', i.e. between support and leader (support-feminity[not mindless obedience, do not confuse the two or suffer geuine narcissit-abuse or borderline... masculinity-leadership or duty-bound. Both 'gendered-role' require intelligence and responsibility; gained/acquired experience and 'humanity for the group'). _______ At the core of 'femininity' (its essence) is "support". 'Masculinity' is to be "goal-driven" and "dutiful" (both necessitates intelligence and the absence of NPD; otherwise deranged animosity and cruelty is inevitable-both are counterproductive to 'teamwork/dualism/ying-Yang/feminity-masculinity'). 'This' is the ying and Yang that makes the 'team work in harmony'. Feminity-masculinity psychological dynamics is needed to make a team of both genders, evolutionarily speaking (pertaining to the purpose of that psychological feature, i.e. feminity-masculinity). To be "supportive"/feminity one must be a cautious team-player. To be supportive does not excuse or imply "lacking a will of your own" (the INFP neuro-psychology/brain-formation is ideal for a supportive-role. INFJ brain-formation can freely alternate between both gendered-role, more so than any other). "Acting girly" is just an 'act'- a deceitful one. On masculinity, being overly [irrationally] aggressive, hypersensitive/insensitive (like a robot) is a [possible] sign of a mental disorder - it is toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity is irrational animosity (thinking and behaving like a volatile neanderthal) and it destroys sustained teamwork. Narcissitic-personality disorder is the bane of 'humanity'/harmonic-symbiosis (in every context). Positive masculinity requires one to be intelligent/rational (not having a pathological disregard for rationality and reality), and to have sufficient levels of 'humanity'; humanity can be displayed/expressed intellectually or socially/emotionally. Positive-masculinity has no tolerance for geuine narcissitic-personality-disorder (NPD)/unfair abuse and unfair-cruelty. Positive-masculinity optimises whatever it does. Positive-feminity lessens hardship, it intellectually cultivates and inspires teamwork via harmony. Positive-feminity does not support narcissitic-personality-disorder (it supports the fight against it instead). Positive-feminity - it supports, it facilitates and it is guided by intelligence and maturity (not having a pathological disregard for rationality and reality).
Just came across your channel because your internet culture vid popped up on my home page 😂 hope you keep up with this kind of content it's pretty sobering. I'm 32 years old and I've struggled with this for years
The “just put up with your girlfriend” experience has always been really confusing to me. My mom has always told me “When you get a wife you’ll have to put up with all the things you hate!!!” and I’ve thought immediately after “then I wouldn’t marry that person.” There’s just too many negative stereotypes surrounding both men and women and if you don’t see genuine, kind and mature men or women for yourself it could be so easy to fall into the “all men/women are bad” trap
I always took that as more of an overdramatized way of saying that even if you love your partner, dealing with someone else’s bullshit for years on years every day isn’t easy, but it’s part of the package and in a way, part of the beauty in it. Maybe that’s just me though.
that quote makes more sense when applies to.. idk, the entire world? what I mean to say is that this quote is definitely accurate. you DO have to put up with things you hate-- to a degree, however. the person of your dreams may also be a clean freak; the person of your dreams may also have an occasionally short temper; the person of your dreams may be terminally ill; the list goes on when it comes to things you'll, "have to deal with." the solution isnt not marrying that person; that's just nonsensical. you'll never find someone who doesnt have a negative quality. but this isnt to say you should marry people despite negative qualities. everybody has limits to what kind of behavior they can "deal with", and some problems are impossible to endure. toxic relationships, for the most part, are the prime example of that; someone (or both partners) most definitely has a problem that the pair just cannot withstand. but the reason people say "you'll have to put up with your partner" is because nobody is perfect, and love also tends to be sacrifice. you'll have to put up with her shopping for clothes, with her asking "am I ugly", with emotional moody fits, behavioral trauma that causes weird quirks, etc.; part of your partner WILL be unsavory. but so will you, so offer her the grace of tolerating it. this is what I THINK the quote means. my English teacher told me to be confident when I write essays so pretend I state everything as fact.
I guarantee you, your long-term partner is going to do a minimum, a bare minimum, of one thing that you cannot stand, and you will do one thing that annoys her to no end. It's a combination of the imperfection of humanity and the brilliance of love between human beings, and it's absolutely possible for it to exist in a toxic way. But to this end, you will have a long-term relationship with nobody ever if you're not willing to put up with a few things.
I respectfully agree and disagree. I believe that everyone has a chance to meet the person that compliments them. Hating someone is a stretch tho cuz not everybody is the same but hating their partner is some work both parties need to work through, if it is not a disaster. Intense hate for a loved one often times came from a place of love. The idea of putting up with your girlfriend or wife is just saying that love goes beyond likeness and attractiveness I think. They have flaws that love can see past and become very special.
Masculine and feminine are two separate spectrums. Masculine being the opposite of boyishness. And femininity the opposite of girlishness. Both masculinity and femininity are simply knowing what is needed of you most. Maturity, when it's needed. And childish joy, when it is appropriate. Aggression, when it's needed. Level-headedness most of the time. These are all traits that define masculinity and femininity. This is my definition of masculinity.
36 year old black man here…..keep this up young man. I believe you are figuring out stuff that I only really figured out in my 30s. You earned a new subscriber with this video. Can’t wait to see where your channel goes from here.
dude, im a lesbian teen girl and i adore this video! i really want to understand men more and be more emphatic towards you guys! i have my dad ofc but i want to see multiple pov’s- thank you for this.
@@joshmaxspeed6906 yeah ive always tried to have an open mind, but trust me most women (at least the ones i know) wouldn’t label this as misogynistic at all. this says nothing against women and just helps men feel better in their body and mind (honestly some points stand for femininity/women too). i mean women are people with understanding and common sense- but i know why you would think that most would label this as misogynistic, the internet is really fucking misleading- but there is definitely a bias that women and men hold for their own gender and then hearing positive things directed at the other make us defensive,, at least thats how i see it (sorry for the long comment 😭)
I like this video man. Ill admit I was beginning to wonder why these red pill ideologies haven't been aligning with me lately,. I was thinking to myself "dang why do I feel hateful towards women? Why am I preaching about how to be a traditional man when I don't practice it myself? Why do I have a parasocial relationship with Andrew Tate when he doesn't even give two sh*ts about me?" There are lot of gaps in it and only half of what these red pill gurus say is true. I stopped watching that type of content the very beginning of this year, its getting ridiculous we shouldn'tbe hating on the opposite sex at a level this extreme. I realize that nobody has the right answers for me and I have so much to learn in this journey, and that is a beautiful thing because in the end my progess in life will truly define my future self. I'm in my young 20s and I'm also realizing that I need to give the internet a break and interact with the world again, I have so much to work on so I need to engage with humans the real way, it will be a few bumps on the way but I will make it. It is not healhty to be stuck living with your parents consuming the internet all day and complain how bad the world is when you don't interact with it in the first place.
This channel is a gem. Another video you may be interested in is DarkMatter's Debunking Redpill as well. It's long as heck but he speaks a lot of truths so it's worth it IMHO.
I would throw around in my head what it is to be a "real man." "Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one." ~ Marcus Aurelius I stopped bothering.
Masculinities biggest problem Is the constant obsession with superficial attributes. Instead of obsessing with physical appearance and men should focus on improving their communication skills.
For me, femininity and masculinity are both in everyone, and for someone to be truly in touch with themselves, they must find their own balance of both
Man you are based as fuck. I have been caught up with self improvement lately. Started working out allot and everything. It’s really nice to have someone in the community who seems to genuinely have the health of others as a priority rather than purely radicalizing certain sentiments for views. Keep it up man this shits really interesting.
They are so great such a nice break from anti woke and breadtube channels. These aren't overtly political and actually tell you healthy ways you can improve yourself.
@@biggnesss7192 as an enjoyer of breadtube content I definitely see how channels like these would be much better for my friends to show them to de radicalize them rather than breadtubers.
@@zirconiumaloe Breadtubers are meant to cater to the audience already present, such is the same with anti-woke content. It will not appeal to anything who's outside of the space, or doesn't already agree with the morals of the creator.
Im a more feminine bi guy, always have been. All of my male friends and boyfriend are masculine, my dads a 37 year old veteran. One thing ive learned from them is that masculinity isnt getting dah hoes, or dah money. That it isnt just pure stoicism or pride. To me, what I find attractive in a man is when they can put there compassion over there pride. Compassionate masculinity to me is more attractive than the top G look how many sterioids I took masculinity alot of Redpill youtubers and influencers profess. Excellent video.
As a trans man with not as many models of masculinity as I'd like to have and look up to, thank you so much. I don't look like a man to my own father, but knowing that identifying as a man and simply feeling joy identifying as one and in the process of becoming one, even if it isn't outwardly seen, is enough for me. I needed to hear this.
Good lord, I did not know how much I needed this video. Thank you, thank you so much. I had been trying way too hard for over a year to be masculine at every opportunity, and all that did for me was wreck my mental health. I tried to be at the top of the rat race and be the best man when I know that is not attainable for me. I forget that the red pill content is for those people who have an undying fire for success. I want success, we all do, but it comes at so many costs. I thought my true passion of being a musician was too feminine and wasn’t a good purpose to fulfill, but strumming my “dinky shitass six string” was the only thing that brought me joy. I got back from a practice with my band yesterday and they commented on how much happier I was. I realized then that you had solved almost all of my problems. I will consume a lot less masculine content, I am in such a good place, I have a job and 3 unbreakable friendships, and I am already above average, pushing myself to limits I couldn’t handle was ruining my life with the feedback loop of dopamine. As a man, I’ll be come successful in my own way, you’ll see The Oblivious Quartet at the top of the charts for U.S. rock, Just you wait. Thank you, Blessings Stranded. You may have saved my life.
I was watching a documentary film like 3 years ago and someone said that being a man is being able to do what you wanna do, love what or who you love, and defend what you love and who you love. I was living by that ever since
he's the type of person I wish I had in my life when I was 15-16 and barely knowing who I was as a human being. Maybe a lot of it could've been skipped. I wish I had someone like this in my life right now actually. I'm glad to have stumbled across your channel, stranger.
this is the channel and content that needs to be pushed out to younger men. A young open minded smart black man not afraid to challenge majority beliefs and opinions and just preaches facts
I would say, in my experience being socialized as a girl/woman, that girls are always expected to be more mature at a younger age because they go through puberty earlier. I've also seen grown men who are reaching 30 unnecessarily putting the responsibility of their personal failure upon women around them over and over again. I can see how women may be encouraged to stay immature in the sense of figuring out the outer world in a traditional sense but men are definitely allowed to be boys emotionally through out their whole lives, very few men I've seen who don't see women as house cleaning fuck machine who can coddle them at home. I hope to see a day where men respect themselves enough to treat themselves and women with emotional nuance on a societal scale.
@@BitchChill the rest of the comment was based on my personal experience, what I've seen in my life and the people around me, I can definitely see it could be a different experience for different people ya know?
Yeah, I was really confused about what he said about men being held to a higher standard of maturity and I feel like he didn’t really give any good examples of that. Women are the ones who are expected to work full time on top of doing the majority of childcare and housework. Men are allowed to be children their whole lives.
I agree that in my personal experiences, myself and the women in my life have been expected to have much higher levels of maturity than the men in my life. Between my brothers and myself (I'm the middle child) I was expected to be the most mature among us. I was held to a very different standard than my older brother (he's 4 years older than I am) and this started early (age 10 at least).
"If you have to uphold and maintain a version of you that doesn't even come naturally, and requires a constant effort to uphold 24/7, then what is the point?" So I agree and disagree and while I don't want to derail from the primary topic of the video, this isn't in regards to masculinity; at least not as it's primary focus. Because I have severe ADHD, if left unmedicated and to my own devices, who I am naturally is incredibly lethargic, immature, introverted, uninvolved, and without a lot of ambition. You know that analogy of the little voice in the back of your head that tells you to take it easy, you can skip a day, there's always tomorrow. Switch it around, there's a nagging feeling that is screaming to get things on track but I'm the one coming up with the excuses. Like you mentioned, that one RU-vidr who turned his life around but it needs constant attention and upkeep. I'm able to do that with the use of prescribed neurochemical stimulants, even then it's still and uphill battle, except the climb against myself is no longer 90 degrees. I take these medications because they make it an actual possibility to force myself to engage in the things I wouldn't otherwise want to. I can force myself to care about and engage in the things I normally would not want to. Also by "care" I mean that I can actually force my brain to problem solve in situations, or regarding topics I have no natural partiality towards, otherwise I do not give enough of a fuck. The thematic relation I'm trying to get across is that if I stick to who I am naturally, sure I can be satisfied in my hole of interest, up until the point that I look up and see the light outside of it, now that I've started climbing out, yeah each foot I climb is a monotonous upkeep to a personality and lifestyle that isn't who I am, but it helps me to get, or maintain who I want to be so to speak. I think a quote that sticks with me constantly is "Hell is the place where the person you are, meets the person you could have been."
i definitely appreciate you taking the time to comment this. i get what you mean. but my closing statements about growing into & working towards being the man you want to be should've implied that there's a difference between a situation like yours and his. basically, the guy that's working overtime to put on an image out of pure insecurity is not doing it for the same reasons you are. you're doing it because you genuinely do not like who you are when you're unmedicated. and even then you could likely say that some people take meds out of social insecurity too cause they don't like who they are socially when unmedicated but context is very important. i wouldn't even think to put both of your situations in the same category. i hope that made sense.
@@blessings-strandedGood day, sir. What about when cultures respect masculinity more so both men and women behave more masculine to get job opportunities, respect, etc?
Masculinity and femininity feel much more like aesthetics to me than actions or lifestyles. Masculine looking/presenting people, feminine looking/presenting people. I'm a 21 year old guy and I personally don't think of myself as very masculine, though I think others may see me differently and for now at least I'm trying not to worry about it. Also you mentioned Stoicism but I think you may be misinterpreting the concept. As I understand it, Stoicism is not about disregarding your feelings and toughing it out. Rather it is about feeling your feelings (which may include crying) but doing the difficult thing anyway. Feeling how scary and intimidating it is and still pushing through, rather than running, avoiding, or submitting. Basically not letting your feelings control your actions. HealthyGamerGG did an interview on his yt with Ludwig recently and I think he explains it really well in that video. In this way of looking at it, I think Stoicism is something everyone should strive for. Facing the uncomfortable and conquering it, without avoiding the worst of it is the most difficult and admirable thing to be able to do imo.
interesting perspective. i was going based off how other people in these spaces view stoicism however which was the basis for what i spoke about. those men and even just men in general view stoicism as showing & feeling zero emotion.
@@blessings-stranded those type of people doesn't understand stoicism. Stoicism is controlling your emotions, not surprising it. When you hear people say stoicism is surprising emotions, then they are twisting it's meaning.
@@blessings-stranded stoicism is just accepting stuff won't change no matter how long you dwell on it, say a loved one died, you will cry, you will be sad, you will enter depression maybe, thats normal, surpressing all that only will hurt you and may lead to suicide even, but, you need to move on, you need to accept what happened happened, and not try and change it, but instead try and focus your energy towards something you can change, everything you can change being only internally, which is a thing I love about stocisism most, it says to stop trying to stress yourself out and harm yourself based on things that happen externally, that you cannot control, but instead focus on what you can control.
@@blessings-stranded that's what I thought stoicism was too until I learned differently. It is easy to misinterpret and it's not surprising to see that misinterpretation gain so much traction in male spaces. I assume most people watching this caught your meaning when you used the term.
So glad I found this video and channel. I really like what you said about the women that you like being more likely to like you. In my experience this is incredibly true, I won't say what my type is but it's fairly niche, at least as far as I'm aware, and somehow of the like 5 girls I've ever known to have liked me, 4 of them were my EXACT type. I am not an attractive guy in any way, however a LOT of my friends have always been girls because of how feminine I am and that is why I've been so successful. The vast majority of people following the "manosphere" are young men between like 13-25. If one of the simplest definitions for masculinity is that it is the opposite of "boyishness", then wouldn't that easily make the "manosphere" the exact opposite of masculinity. Because that is EXACTLY what I think it is. People are too doomer over this shit, it really isn't impossibly to get girls to like you, you just gotta put yourself out there, pheromones are a very well researched topic, your chances ARE higher when you're attractive but every day is a new chance and sitting at home on a kick livestream watching sneako or adin ross gives you a 0% chance.
I watched your last video and wasn't sure how I felt about it. To me, a lot of it made sense so I checked the masculinity video that was recommended. To be honest I was pretty nervous to watch it. I'm trans masc and so many videos made about masculinity are made terribly. they usually make me want to leave in the first few minutes. But I was much more willing to listen to you because you didn't try to pander or add unnecessary stuff. I'm also black and I appreciated the short section about black boys. I love this type of conversation.
@@davidsplooge14 For me personally I don't feel like a man or woman. I am nonbinary but identify specifically with the trans-masc label. I don't feel a need to be recognized as male, only masculine. Being female doesn't really bother me, it's just something that I am. I generally prefer masculine terms for myself, but I'm not really interested in being a man. If you have any other questions about it, I'm free to answer.
@@projectcookie12 ah so no dysphoria. You are non binary you just lean on to the masculine side/aesthetics more. I sure do hope you wear androgynous or manly clothes because it is real confusing for people. Transfolk, not the trans-community, are slowly rebuilding their reputation but the damage and confusion from before is making it slow. But what do I know I'm a cis male from another country take this with the smallest grain of salt.
@@davidsplooge14 I'm not out yet so I don't really dress the way I want to at the moment. Despite that people have said I walk like a boy. ( I do dress pretty androgynous) People can be confused all they want but that wouldn't stop me from dressing the way I want. It's not really that I have no dysphoria I just stopped associating my body with how I'd want to be referred to. I'm not sure why you are talking down on yourself about being a cis male but it doesn't affect your points that much.
Damn. This came in clutch. I’ve been recently dealing with some internalized misogyny due to unresolved trauma. Its really affected my relationships because i am so slow to trust women. But i’ve always recognized it as a problem with my thinking, not all women. Just needed someone to speak a little sense to these issues. Thanks
I started watching hamza around the same time as you. I started getting on it because I was a loner and wanted to look good. His content got me into physical fitness and eventually I got into other things like philosophy and learning. I also started to come back to my religion in order to improve myself and become more mature. Now my mental health and physical health has improved greatly.
I actually don't give a shit anymore about me being feminine sometimes even though I'm a dude. I will stay a dude, I will behave like one, but sometimes I feel feminine and I don't mind behaving a bit more like a girl. I don't know why people stress themselves with opinions with the way they're standing, sitting, sneezing, sleeping and other things that can be called "feminine". Can't make a change anyway, ppl will always trash talk. Their life must be boring, I don't wanna share with them.
I remember hearing a story about one of my dads friends. She was showering with this dude and their was literal sh** in between his cheeks cause he said it was too “feminine” to wash your own ass
Have you ever heard of Jason Wilson? He wrote a couple books on a balanced, healthy, self-respecting masculinity that has biblical roots. Their called “Cry like a Man” and “ Battle Cry”
I’m not one to comment on RU-vid vids but damn I just found this channel and you gotta be one of the wisest and realest people I’ve seen on the platform. Everything said in this video made SO much sense, and yet no one else (that I know of) is speaking on it. Life has been pretty rough for me this year but I’m going to take the wisdom you’ve given and apply it to my own life. Keep doing what you’re doing.
As someone who was in the red pill black hole, this video is really important also i know its not the main point of the video but sneako is one of those redpill creaters unfortunately, he is a huge tate jock rider
haha yea. the goal was always to be an entertainer, that's the primary direction i'm headed after this year. so it seemed best to get these more serious vids out now, especially because all of them serve to help people understand me as a person. basically, this first year on youtube is one big introduction.
Holy shit. This guys video(s) are absolutely crazy. when i discovered you… It really helped me develop a higher level of thinking, especially how ideas flow out of you. Its baffling Thank you.
Thank you man! I’ve been miserable for the past six months, trying to be someone I’m not, attempting to control how others perceived me. But you’ve definitely helped me realize that maturity trumps masculinity. Because when you’re moving with maturity, your inner masculinity shows naturally.
Basically just be yourself strive for health physically mentally and spiritually and pursue what you want don't hurt others or self for no good reason.. This goes for all peoples.
This is a great summary of masculinity! As someone who’s friends with a lot of male friends (online specifically sometimes real life) I always try my best to comfort them and say you don’t have to follow these standards that are shown by the internet and on the red pilled side. It’s great to see people like you
I absolutely love your content. As a woman I’m learning so much about the struggles of men and I’m learning to empathize more thru this knowledge pls keep sharing more wisdom
Im feeling you. Thats the second video I've watched on this channel. You talk about so many things while ALL your words have meaning, no space holders. One really can see the inspiration and the honesty behind your videos. Im on my way detaching from social media consuming less and less every day. TikTok, Instagram, snapchat, all that sh*t is GONE from my phone and i feel way more pleasent with my life. I saw a lot of this type of content before and thats why i stopped using these platforms. And yes, it was all this masculinity and what not bs, but I luckily filtered that away and took advice that actually made sense to me. The problem with "red pill content" is that people inhale EVERYTHING out of it and put that as a basis for their life. They barely think about how they feel abt what they're really doing. And yeah, you shouldnt question that on a daily basis, but reflection is a key part of becoming a good person and it is THE KEY for becoming the person you WANT to BE. I've got a feeling that more and more people google "how to fix this and that on me" and follow a step by step guide from a guy living a completely different life while ignoring EVERYTHING around it. I already did that, Ive been there and at the end there was nothing left but wrath. You will go mad if you try warp your real identity instead of discovering and learning to live with all your needs and wants. And thats the point where you got yourself together. But there are SO many Idealists out there. Especially Tate-fans dont seem to get that you need to get yourself together FIRST in order to be even be CAPABLE of "providing" for somebody else. Another position ("provider") they put themselves in without any reasoning. I really hope your videos get more views, a lot of people really need to hear you.
needed this video man cuz this one time I was talking to this girl and she had stopped talking to me and she had said it was cuz I wasnt manly enough (we were 15 years old) it was very strange to me so I tried to put on a persona almost where I dont crack jokes and im jus quiet and laid back then people thought I was shy so I talked more again then people said I talked too much... moral of the story people are gonna say what they want and its up to you to decide if you wanna be yourself or exhaust yourself trying to keep up and turn yourself into something your not jus because someone said it would be good for you
What I love about your content is that you tap into the other plane of existence. Not the physical plane, but the one inside your mind. The one we all exist in but can’t put into words.
I have to say, i watched this and your video on incels and division on the internet and you have the most nuanced and level headed takes i think ive heard on the internet. I respect the fuck out of how your intospection. As a 37 year old i hope to reach your level one day. You got a good head on your shoulders and i hope i see you go far kid.
Best way to approach self improvement is to not seek out self improvement gurus. Take the time to identify and target the things you want to improve, then seek out information for improving in those ways. Self improvement figures are always mixing in personal views and ideas on what they think is best for your life, you don't need to improve your confidence in negging women at the club if you're already rejecting feminine things. Also because allot of these self improvement guys really don't have anything more than basic knowledge in health and fitness. Please go look for advice from people with a richer knowledge on those topics.
This is one of the greatest videos I’ve ever watched. You explained everything perfectly, everything I’ve been thinking subconsciously but never been able to articulate. Thank you
Your channel is a breath of fresh air. Im impressed with how well spoken you are and how fleshed out your ideas are. You legitimately sound like you're trying to be empathetic of all viewpoints which is something so many of us forget about.
20:02 THIS!! I swear man I’ve had no interest in girls yet for this specific reason. “Oh, they’ll think you’re weird if they know you do X or like Y.” “Stop doing that, you’re scaring the hoes away!” That’s why for the longest time I’d just accepted the fact that I’d gladly forego any of that if it meant giving up who I really am. Now I’m thinking of doing all that ‘masculine’ stuff now, but not because it’s masculine and is gonna get me all the girls; I just want to try something new. I’ve been going through the motions in live for years at this point - since elementary school - and it’s just gotten tiring; it’s a big reason for my depression and the shit I’m going through now. Part of me was tired of the way things were, while another part of me was scared of things changing. That’s why I wanna do this now; I want to push myself and find out who I really am and what I am not, because like you said, the worst that can happen is I just find out that the hyper masculine - get all the b*tches - lifestyle just really isn’t for me; and I’d be one step closer to figuring out who I really am.
it does boggle my mind that some people really think that trying to become hyper masculine will make them abundantly happier and get rid of suicidal thoughts, whereas in reality, setting your "goal" to such a ridiculous level where all these other hyper masculine men are at, only give yourself more room to look down on yourself and hate yourself even more.
I think when doing these essays and thinking about definitions, you should also not only think and research, but also talk with other people about the words and maybe ask them for their own definition
Thanks for including the part with Alicia and John Nash in the video. A lot of those damn Alpha male RU-vidrs had me thinking I had to act like a brick for someone to love me.
Fantastic video man! Your story of trying to be all in on masculinity is similar to my experience. I wanted to change and went all in. It was an invaluable experience because I was able to accept myself when I burnout. Putting up a facade showed me I can just be me and some people are gonna like me and some wont and thats okay.
My man, I just wanna say that I found your channel today and your content is really great! I love the fact that you approach complex topics in a level-headed and nuanced way, instead of offering an extreme perspective like the ones we get from the countless "bubble communities" on the internet. Keep working hard and putting out quality content like this and I'm 100% sure you've got a bright future ahead of you on this platform.
“If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or being hated, don’t give way to hating, And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise: If you can dream-and not make dreams your master; If you can think-and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools: If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’ If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with Kings-nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run, Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, And-which is more-you’ll be a Man, my son!” -If by Rudyard Kipling
I swear your videos are making me have epiphanies, man. I'm 13 and I've always been super insecure about not being "man enough". This made me realize that I'm actually more of a man than I thought I was and that it really doesn't matter as much as I thought it did. Thank you. I can finally relax lol
I’m a transgender man who presents himself as feminine despite medically transitioning for over 2 years. The gender dysphoria and imposter syndrome I feel is suffocating. I’m not “man enough” because of how I dress and what interests I have. To be seen and heard as a man, I need to shed every ounce of femininity from myself and become a carbon copy of my brothers, uncles and late father. To be taken seriously by other trans men, I need to be exactly like the hypermasculine, rugged, cis-passing guys that the entire community is seemingly comprised of. It’s incredibly isolating because no one (to my knowledge) truly understands.
